Put an End to Your Fears - Rabbi Yom Tov Glaser

there are five fears that stop human beings five fears that stop people you have all five fears I have all five fears it's completely normal and natural to have all these five fears what your level of fear is on each of the five fears is unique to you some are higher some are lower but one thing for sure is that based on the circumstance you're in one of these five fears will stop you will just stop you and you'll see other people keep going but you'll be stopped you freeze you get paralyzed you can't move it's what's called a glass ceiling in personal development work it's a glass ceiling meaning you see other people reaching beyond it but you just keep hitting your head on it because you hit one of your fears the five fears that every person has just get a little more kink out of this thing five fears that everyone has is the fear of rejection the fear of failure the fear of being out of control the fear of the unknown and finally the fear of pain and suffering here I mean physical pain and suffering okay these are the five fears they're universal to human beings there's some cities have these fears and greater volume for example rejections a very West Coast kind of California issue Los Angeles Hollywood it's all about how you look in the face of others East Coast you get a lot of failure issues you know because it's it doesn't matter what you look like if you're succeeding yeah you're what you got what it takes out of control is popular in Toronto which is interesting why that is I've never studied why that is that Toronto out of control is the dominant fear but there's other obvious ones like South Africa Jews from South Africa are a fraction of the 10% of whites in a completely tribal land the unknown is you know Israel yeah his roads got the big unknown and pain and suffering would be any war-torn place that's going on you know any place that's dealing with Wars and stuff like this now it also hit sages interestingly according to this order I only made this order based on popularity because the most popular fear is rejection the second most is failure I mean if you actually just test a population these will be you know if you had it all mixed in a groups of human beings this is the order of popularity dominant less dominant wisdom but it also goes according to age when you become self-aware for the first times usually around three and a half years old three to four years old you become self-aware so the very first thing you have is rejection why you're a clumsy little kid you walk like a penguin you're you know your vocabulary extremely limited and it seems everything you say is the funniest thing everyone ever hurt you know and you you just don't know how to look good and in the eyes of others it's impossible to look good at three years old looking good is just not gonna be on the menu you know and there's no way to look good at that age but later when you start getting a little more adept at things and and you can now like you're in the world of doing things your fear of failure kicks in and then what you'll notice is people are dealing with the fear of failure for many many years until they hit generally around forty fifty you see we're all born with you know first we're fetuses which is a total question mark the shape it's like a question mark and then you're born but you're really very mushy you're still kind of a question mark then you grow up and you're really just this question mark that's kind of growing and growing and expanding but what happens in your in at least in the Jewish world in your early 20s but in the secular world maybe up in your 30s is you start turning those question marks into exclamation points meaning all those questions like who will I marry where will I live what will be my income you know all those questions what's gonna be my commitment Jewishly all these different questions become exclamation points this is who I'm marrying this is where I'm gonna live this is how I'll make my living this is my career you know this is my you turn those question marks all become exclamation points but what happens when you hit your late 40s 50s is you've now got all all your seeds you planted back in your 20s have no they've grown into trees themselves and you gotta somehow hold it all together you're holding it all together and you know once you're late for mid 40s late 40s 50s you're holding it all together in the fear of being out of control because it can hemorrhage anywhere you know that the situation feels quite out of control especially with teenagers acting like knuckleheads you know right when they should be getting ready for marriage they acting like Michigan is and and not to mention what it takes financially to to manage it all and and you're not like you're not a hot and your 50s you're not a hot item on the job market if your job or industry suddenly you know tanks yeah now how you're gonna float out you see how out of control is getting pretty scary but then what happens is as you know you start like you know you need a little oil for your hinges you know you got a little older you start to realize I'm gonna die one day I'm gonna die one day and that is it's the greatest unknown you know the final frontier dad you have no idea where that is what that is now of course if you're raised in Tura you're living in Terra so for us we get to beat this is the one thing we get to beat the unknown we get to be we got that beat when it comes to death because we all know that you know life is like a divorce and death is like marriage you know I know this sounds a little bit like a death cult but but we we believe that our souls have eternity to them we've come from a place called the world of souls or lamb honey Chaumont we've come from there we've been putting these bodies which are very uncomfortable and it's totally awkward that we have to go to the bathroom and and then at the end of our lives we go back to the world of souls we're home we're married that's why a yard sign is called a he Lula which means a wedding that part we're not so worried about because if anything if you meet the average Jew who's keeping Judaism there they're using up every last ounce of their body my wife said that when she gets the end after raising her 8 kids you know and all she puts out every day to this moment she says when she gets upstairs she's gonna take her body it's gonna be like it's meat draped like this it's just gonna take her body and she throw it at God here it is you snip every last drop by the way she goes to gym to yoga to Pilates and in brisk walks everywhere she's not like you know she's definitely keeping it together but she's she's here to use it use it last drop now I just want to mention one more thing is that death is a gift also because it makes you put on your running shoes you know if you look at the tour people are living like hundreds of years so we already see what teenagers are like in adolescence they think they're gonna live forever and they know they're not they know they're not and they still act like they're gonna live forever in secular world you act like you're gonna live forever till you in your 30s plus so God introduced death as you know and also lifespan kept bringing it down towards you know at least 120 which is what we like to say it gets you to wake up a bit you know it's like it's like finals there's nothing like a final in university to get you to study you know it gets you to put on your running shoes when you have midterms and finals you'll actually get busy with things and we have a reminder of that every single week with Shabbat because everyone knows one Shabbat hits you cannot cook another thing you cannot hit another light switch you're done you can't drive anywhere to go get anything you're done and that is a reminder of the end of our lives Shabbat it's a reminder of the end of our lives that there's a point where any Mitzvah that you can do will only be because you have a body and so your day if you're a young kid you're on Sunday if you're in your 20s you're on Monday if you're in your third year on Tuesday if you're in you know if you're in your 40s or 50s it's Wednesday if your sixties or seventies it's Thursday in your 80s it's Friday I'm getting ready for Shabbat because whatever you cook is what you eat what you cook in this world is what you'll eat in the next and we have that reminder every single week very rare you'll see anyone preparing for Shabbat on Sunday but smart people prepared they do a little something on Wednesday at least much more on Thursday and then you know Friday I don't know what your houses look like on Fridays but if you're ever coming to us please don't show up until after sundown if you don't want to get hit by a train and it reflects when you go to old folks homes in if you could if you go to secular old folks homes I'm a musician so I have to go these places and stuff when you go to a secular old folks home so I mean it's painful for me to watch this but you'll see some old lady or some old man walking from the dining room back to their room it is a test in patience it's something cuz the other joints aren't working so well they're real small steps but there's also there's no rush so it's something like this and I go out of my mind it's like that's like fingernails on a chalkboard for me I'm like and I see their room is like 200 yards away down this really long hall I would like pick him up and take him the rest of the way now elderly people in Jerusalem okay their joints work longer because everywhere we walk everywhere here so your joints work longer we're not sitting in we're not driving around Oldsmobiles up to the shopping malls you know where we're actually walking through the shuch putting vegetables and bags you know just keeps your joints move and when you're throwing those you know cucumbers in there and the and not the men's you're gonna be walking home like a Neanderthal man you know the missing link you know walking home with your knuckles hittin the floor by the time you get home and they it helps with longevity of your joints and your muscles and stuff I'm sure there's a lot less arthritis here just from the amazing amount of use that people have to their diet in and Jerusalem most people make their own breakfast the day they die so the but if you check them out when they get really old so then they're really old I'm talking like you know they're in their 90's or something when they when they get really to that age if they still they can't take big steps but watch them walk watch the elderly of Jerusalem walk the real white beards shining glowing people they walk like this they literally walk like that and they they can't move much better than the people in the old folks homes you know that I've that I've gotten to visit in America they don't have much more you know movement available to them but they're in a rush because it's Friday afternoon and the sun's on the horizon they got mitzvos to do as long as you're still in this body got work to do that was all parenthetical to our class by the way I hope you enjoyed all those Santa bites that was just for fun let's get back to our class there are five fears that every person has and where we got to was the unknown and then there's pain and suffering pain and suffering is sadly that's where my father's at no he's 85 you should be well should bless him to have no pain in his life but he's uh but it's he's he goes to bed every night with the fear of what's gonna hurt tomorrow what's gonna happen tomorrow what's gonna be the next thing that comes up because it body your body's filled with different systems and those systems have been running for years and years and years and years and they're they're getting tired these systems and they're the up keeps getting harder and harder and it becomes a fear of pain and suffering towards the end of one's life this is another reason why we have to work unconsciousness because the more conscious you are the less of a body you are meaning that's why the you have to become the consciousness of your body not your body taking over your consciousness give you an example have you ever stubbed your toe I just saw a guy stub his toe in the mix I really feel bad for this guy it was like cartoon his big toe is just like it's like throbbing and and he was just like he was his toe when you stub your toe you are your toe it's like your whole being just like fold it up into it a toe because when you stub your toe you are a toad you ever had your back go out your your back when your back goes up you don't exist anymore you're just the pain in the back your your back headache you're a head but someone who has become disciplined in the art of conscious living where you're identified not with the body but rather with the soul which is your consciousness when you become soul conscious and then someone hits the stage of the pain and the suffering well you may have some pain but you can get rid of the sufferer do you think nice people that you can have pain without suffering because you started working on this when you were when you turn let's say you all decide I'll start working on this when I'm 75 you think you think it's gonna work oh yeah if you want to not suffer at the end of your life with when the when these systems are shutting down which can you come to lead to a lot of pain don't wait till then to become someone who lives with soul consciousness being a conscious person now is your chance this is your chance most people that age if I imagine me you know a consciousness trainer I train people in conscious what I do you know besides some reaching out to Jews I train people in consciousness and my seminars so imagine me going up to an 85 year old and saying it and my father just me going up to my father and say okay for the dad we're gonna breathe we're gonna do deep breathing and we're just gonna become the awareness around the pain yeah we're gonna be the awareness around the pain my father look at me like I fell off some kind of stars on the like you out of your mind they're weirdos around the baby you probably mimic me and like make fun of it but you all know that you better be the awareness around the pain or you are the pain you are the back you are the stomach you are the headache you are the stiff arthritic limbs and joints you got a practice now and every ounce every ounce of every lesson you will ever learn in Judaism if you look deeper into it you can boil it down it's to get you conscious it's to get you to be focused on the soul you could show me the most mundane piece of Talmud that's just about like I don't know whose object is it anyway you know let's say it's a fight over an object or something or or it could be contract law it could be real estate law the most mundane thing real like what does this have to do with consciousness and my discipline in being the awareness around the object were fighting over but I promise you every single law I could take you throughout the whole Tara and if you be happy if you want to quiz me mention any law and if you just think a little creatively you'll realize that it's just our sages once again getting you back to consciousness because when you live in conscious and I'll give you the example by the way I just mentioned a couple business issues or a fight over an object let me give you that one for now since I brought it up is when you live in consciousness you are me and I am you I when you're in consciousness you're really now your soul oriented and you have a song I have a soul so what's the difference you know I want to make sure you're eating - I just I'm not gonna take extra portion at the lunch cuz you or me and I am you and that brings us to the laws of sadaqa the word snuff that means charity the word it's not gonna mean setec it means it means it's the scales it's then its apportionment its appropriateness its righteousness like I had more than he did well I want to share it I'm gonna share it snuck it means doing the right things it's making sure everyone's eating no matter what Mitzvah you look at it will always bring you no matter what hahaha even if it's in business because if you and I have a discrepancy in business if you believe you deserved more than I did in this deal and now we're both in front of a court case in front of a judge obviously a Jewish judge does were Jews you know every city in the world defers to Jewish courts you know that every city in the world the first a Jewish course meaning uh in the every city has Jewish courts real courts that are run only by Torah and we are allowed to go do everything we want in there judiciously there and and whatever the judgment is will hold civilly no matter where you are it holds civilly we're the fathers of the courts Judaism and Tomita Clause the fathers of all courts we developed this we are the ones who created it and it holds up in all civil courts so yours of my discussion there just are discrepancy our conflict the resolution of that conflict the law that will come up in the Talmud between us will will be to create equity between us it will figure out what we really owe so that we're one if you lose and I win you will leave happy if I lose neuen I will leave happy we always leave happy because we want what's right because we're conscious it's leading to consciousness whereas when you go into your egocentric loss of consciousness where you become possessed by your own egoic mind represented by Greece in the Hanukkah story when you get stuck in that mind so that if you lose you've lost you got that and he won when you're near Goa come on you're you're a social Darwinist less for you more for him less for you when you're in consciousness when you live from Seoul so then where we are one and you'll see that every word of Judaism you will ever hear is to get you to that consciousness but sadly I mean the next thing it's just gonna be a little commentary you can throw in the wastebasket if you want it's just rabbis spouting off here sadly Judaism's seen by most people as a religion not as a discipline and creating conscious living scene as a religion and people will literally dot their eyes and cross their T's and live perfectly electric lives they never get to consciousness and they will do very unconscious things in the way meaning they're never break hahaha but egoic minds at work disconnections of fathers and daughters disconnections of husbands and wives disconnections of siblings to one another your own blood your own blood can become a drama a drama that has led to icy relationships while keeping kosher and keeping Shabbat and having your tefillin with your little mirror perfectly in the middle when every ounce of the tour and all its laws were just trying to get you to be a soul just to be a conscious soul to be a person of the spirit I don't think you should throw that in the waste basket I think that was important too here let's look at these five fears when experienced from consciousness but before we do that let's do a little exercise in consciousness to make sure we're all there rather than talk about consciousness let's do an exercise to get us all to consciousness as I said before there is a conflict between your egoic mind and your conscious you know broader you know expanded self so what we'll do is we'll just we'll let our egoic mind be a little quieter for a moment and we'll slow it down and then we'll get ourselves into a broader space and then we will apply that conscious mind to these five fears which are the you know the really the worst part of being a human being is this is what's stopping you these five fears and what stopped you in life so let's see how they survive how the shadowy fears survive when we shine the spotlight of consciousness upon them and then see what kind of life you have so let's do a little exercise just to get ourselves conscious and then we will we'll move to shine the light on those fears let's begin by just sitting comfortably and do a little breathing why why breathing there's a lot of reasons we could breathe but for us right now the breathing is only to get your mind to slow down because if you start thinking only about your breathing which doesn't require any thought breathing's involuntary but by focusing on your breathing your mind's gonna slow down and what a pleasure to slow down the mind a little bit and get yourself more conscious did I just say the word more and get yourself conscious we're gonna do a little deeper breathing it'll be from the abdomen so you'll notice on the deep breath sit comfortably good posture give your lungs somewhere to be okay you'll notice my shoulders and chest do not expand with a deep breath ready it's only here look here feeling the balloon blowing out for those releasing the air from the balloon filling the balloon everyone breathe in show how fat you are to your little friends and then show them how thin you are while you blow out through mouth together tight tight stomach yep do the nose exhale through the mouth now we're gonna do a double breath is I mean first the belly and then the chest in through the nose chest hold out through the mouth through the nose belly chest hold release through the mouth real slow purse your lips so comes out slow as your belly contracts keep flowing out into the nose chest hold breathing out through the mouth and now close your eyes please continue with this work into the nose belly expands chest hold and just focus on the energy between your eyes on your forehead right between your eyes release through the mouth into the knows belly chest hold again focusing on the energy between your eyes just focusing on that spot on your the bottom of your forehead right between the eyes release through the mouth as your belly contracts now just breathing normally and focusing on your inner body you have an outer body and it's your skin and your nails your hair but inside of you is a whole inner body it's the actual living stuff where your pulse is pulsating your blood is flowing muscles are firing or relaxed at this particular moment it's an inner life force focus on that inner life force of yours let it oscillate the focus of relaxation of your inner body from the tippier toes focus now on the tip your toes and let it move like a wave with the count of three up to the tip your head one two three and letting it move its way up your legs to your torso and up to your head tip your head now from the tip of your head back to your toes one two three release like a wave of relaxation moving down in your body all the way down to your toes and now just breathing normally I'm focusing on the fact that God is not just surrounding creation but God is also filling creation as before there was a creation God existed in absolute oneness although there was nothing yet created and given that all that there was before creation was that oneness that consciousness of God God therefore created the world out of that consciousness in other words the whole world is the consciousness of God so allow that consciousness that God is in creating the physical world to fill the room feel yourself like you're in a cocoon surrounded by the consciousness of God the very stuff he created the world with and realized that the presence of God is surrounding you like a cocoon you're on the air that's touching your skin in the fibers of your clothing but realize why would you stop there it's in your skin cells your blood cells your bone cells brain cells God is creating you all with tremendous precision care desire for your existence God wants you here it's an unconditional love that he wants you here with because you'll notice no matter how you behave bananas are not less sweet sunsets are not less beautiful it's an unconditional love the world remains gorgeous take a few moments and just feel that God is creating you you're like jello in that you're you're like congealed consciousness as God which is the ultimate consciousness preceding creation congealed his consciousness into the creation and you yourself are a congealed consciousness inside the creation not only are you loved and wanted here by God but he's also orchestrating all the events of your life in fact how you got to this very moment where you sit in your chair right now it's all part of tremendous orchestration the details of which are mind-boggling they're unfathomable and they could never be counted or ever understood yet they have all in the end equaled use in your chair right now experiencing this moment and take a moment and feel the security that just like God ranek managed all those details just as God banished all those details he'll be handling the rest as well he's got you covered he got you till now he's gonna get you in the future so feel that security he's got you covered you can handle this feel that feeling of security when you're in the consciousness of God it's not just that you're gonna be fine it's that you're gonna be great and experienced as well the feeling of harmony that everything that ever happened to you is happening to you will happen to you it's all part of a great story like in an instrumental piece that has perhaps dissonant notes but when you play the whole chord together its harmonious your life might have had some difficulty there might have been tough times which are like the dissonant note in the chord that the piano player is playing with all 10 fingers but when you play all 10 together when you look at the big picture of your life you'll see that there's a harmony to it all that it all makes sense take a few moments and feel the harmony and now with that consciousness open up your eyes on the count of five one two three four five opening up your eyes and stay totally conscious now stay conscious go to your inner body now close your eyes go back to the inner body just focus on your inner body and now open your eyes looking at your hand so you're still focused on your inner body looking at your hand and just focus on the inner body the life force in your hand and now slowly look up from your hand at the world room around you staying but don't focus on me focus you can look at me but you can focus only on the inner body while looking at me okay don't take it out focus off the body your body keep focus on your own body and your own life force in this centered and grounded space while looking at other things and that's very slow thinking now we've slowed you down that was all an exercise to slow you down and to get conscious God conscious now know we're inside your brain will you be found brain science has searched the brain they've mapped it they know where hunger is where we're hot cold love ambition they found it all desire it's all there they've mapped everything and they were but they weren't searching for those things necessarily what they were searching for was you like the actual point of reference you call you you like the actual you that's what they were looking for well they got to the other side and they never found it because you're not in there you're not in there at all you have a brain but you are not your brain and as we said earlier when someone stubs their toe they become a toe when someone has a headache their head when someone has a backache they become their back well guess what we're all in a lot of trouble you know why because of your brain and the consciousness of your brain you wind up thinking that that is you you need that your brain is you because it's got content it's got lots of commentary if you ever noticed how much commentary your brain has lots of commentary in there and it's so darn loud and so darn fast your brain never stops according to psychologists Psychology Today brain science they say you think thirty thousand thoughts a day that's a lot of commentary and most of it pretty unnecessary hang hang hang hanging and because of all that contact and because of all that commentary you actually it becomes your stub toe meaning you become it you become the commentary of your own brain and that ain't cool cuz you're not in there in eight you you're never gonna find you there I mean I'll show you a picture if you want to see a big journal making any clear I think this will drive the point home here but this just you know yo I think everyone in the room will agree with me when I show you this picture that this just ain't you it's a someone left a an item I think you'll all agree that this is not you unless you're having a really bad hair day that ain't you but with a massive amount of commentary going on all day long you become it and you get reduced to that and no wonder the world looks hella scary no wonder the world looks so scary because if you think you're that well good luck dealing with that but these five fears let's shine our light of consciousness now who you really are the congealed consciousness of joy of God raspberry jello let's shine that consciousness on to these fears okay everyone just get your conscious state and you're wondering how you're coming off for others rejection how am i coming off for others well what does that mean exactly is that gonna be my finances second I mean the looks of the body that houses my consciousness my soul what exactly is it that I'm gonna be worrying about here probably something to do with my looks something to do with my money maybe something to do with my family's reputation does that sound like conscious living when you shine the light of consciousness on rejection it just fades you'll see that conscious living people when they get old they don't run to plastic surgeons every line on her face is a story it's a it's a world of wisdom it's a badge of honor a conscious life you shine the light of consciousness on to failure meaning how well you perform so a conscious person is someone who gets in tune with their actual gifts unconscious people try to become like med students because their father's a medical doctor and then they try to apply skills that they just don't have to medicine that's very unconscious living conscious people apply their actual skill sets like this is the gifts they were given from the Creator the universe actually apply those and boy do they succeed but again when you go to the egoic mind bed could not stand failure who cares about failure when you're in consciousness give you an example I was once putting my Taylor guitar in the first-class closet on an ll flight and this particular flight unlike most Ella flights the whole first class was empty and the whole business class was empty there was the economy class there's not a seat left and I'm there and the stewardess being very nice because a ton of room and she helps me put my guitar away and I said to her you know you think there's a lot of competition at the top she said oh yeah a lot of competition at the time I said well I don't know looking down there at economy it looks like all the competitions over there and she looks over there and we're both looking and there was like almost a fistfight already breaking out over the by the overhead compartment about six rows back and and it just it looked like a jungle only conscious people realize that the price for success is failure either you're willing to fail and pay that price or you'll just eventually bump into something and call that what you always wanted a conscious person sit there skills looks if the gifts God gave them and then they apply them to life and if you're smart you monetize it and it works but the unconscious person they're so afraid of failure because when you are not conscious this is like a another sore toe a stubbed toe and the last thing you will ever put up with is a failure so what happens is you fail here you go somewhere else you fail there you go somewhere the Evangel a you'll hit something where is highly successful people go meet them go interview them and I know anyone who's retired they'll be happy to take out to lunch once they return you will hear the story if you want to hear the story of their success what you're really gonna be hearing is the story of their what their failures and if you really want to see a great little clip on YouTube look up Michael Jordan's just right Michael Jordan of failure you will see a Nike commercial that knocks them all out he all he talks about is his missed shots including some that lost the championships greatest basketball ever lifts did I just say basketball the greatest basketball player mm-hm that ever lived when you're living in consciousness and God is running the show he's been orchestrating unfathomable detail capital details in unbelievable orchestration with precision beyond belief you can measure when the moon and what position it will be in 20 years from now to a millimeter in his system it the accuracy is insane in your own life then the details get uncredible of what it takes meaning what God is investing just for you just for you little old you incredible and then you shine that light on your fear of being out of control what's gonna be well what's gonna be more the fear of the unknown sorry when you shine that light on the fear of being out of control which will show up in all kinds of ways not going to go into details there but we all avoid lots of controlled people dominating people which can be parents can be law can be rabbis me can we God Himself when you're cut from the conscious place you can breathe because Hashem God's in control and you don't have to be he's got you covered he got you till now he's gonna get you the rest of the way and you shine that light of consciousness unto the unknown and what I'm not expected to be a prophet and Judaism teaches me if I have to deal with unknowns and I have big decisions speak to my rabbi making my rabbinic if he can't handle it'll send me to someone else but we have a tradition for that you don't make your own mistakes let the rabbi make the mistake but seriously everyone wants to sing I did it my way at the end of their life it's it's not Jewish Judaism of consciousnesses your your guided life it's got it why do you gotta make your own mistakes smart people learn from others and as we spoke about earlier you shine the light of consciousness on pain physical pain and suffering that's it's only the body that hurts you're doing great in fact it's sunset at the end of life when the body's kind of falling apart it's sunset it's about to be Shabbos Suns about to drop shots about to come in and you're gonna eat all the food you cooked throughout your lifetime you stay conscious throughout it you gotta get that now don't wait till then to think you're gonna suddenly get good at this all of Judaism is only there to get you conscious every Mitzvah every halakha every custom every act of service and prayer and every other shaking of vegetation and all these different things were doing dwelling and circus they're all just to bring you to consciousness please take this work we did today and live it don't leave it in here take it with you for the rest of your lives I mean I know I'm everyone just regarding the training I do for people is it's called the possible you the possible you is your conscious you as opposed to the egoic mind which is the rerun the rerun you that everything seems to morph back into the same old issues no matter what you do and you can check it out the possibly org anyone wants to see but it was a pleasure working with you all today Shalom