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Overcoming Speech Impediment & Glossophobia | Torat HaChassidut (26)

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Rabbi Yaron Reuven avatar
Rabbi Yaron Reuven

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You want to know who you are? You were there, not your great grandfather. [Music] This ain't history. It's your identity. Fire in the sky in our bones echo deep soul stood there. Feel that shift. You think you just showed up in this generation. Now you were summoned for that revelation. The Torah wasn't just in laws, not just with the manual for what the soul [Music] needs. We were there. [Music] We got the Torah, we got the flame and we carry it forward. So don't [Music] forget it. Don't wait force. This memory is the weapon, the shield, the spear. It wasn't just identity. It wasn't a speech. [Music] Our mission began. We took the hope were heavy but the weight's divine. That truth in your daily grind. We just anient past. We're the people who blast from fire and cloud thunder and flame. We still walk in. We were there. No stories, no spin. Every Jewish on that fire with it echo inside where truth never fame. It's the same without shame. The god they saw what we got and ever since then we've been in their plot from Rome to exile to war. They couldn't handle the truth we swore but we ain't breaking we ain't afraid. We heard a voice already soul stood near the future with our time. Don't let it fade. That fires in you. Don't let it erase the fire. When your feels like it's breaking where your soul was awaken from where we got the flame and we carry it forward. So don't forget stood at the foot of the mountain. You were there. Not just your name, not just your DNA. Your nish stood beneath the mountain when he said no. You didn't ask for proof. You said, "We will do and we will understand." [Music] We're back here on our Sunday night series of the toat based on a foundational of uh called kan. Tonight's show is going to be for the Rabime David and all of Isra and all the righteous Noah that continue to support the organization. Anyone that wants to donate whether it's a uh through credit card or cryptocurrency or anything else, you can go to our website bezatashem.org org. Bes r a t hm.org. So Karim, even though we usually talk about the books and the updates and all that other stuff, we'll try to maybe mention that during the shure, tonight, we really want to just get to it because tonight's speech is about speaking. In fact, overcoming speech impediments or what they call in the industry glossophobia, which people have fear of speaking in public. This is a very common problem. This is a uh very severe problem for many people and quite frankly speaking is a gift from heaven that few have and many desire. This is more desirable in the world of Torah where people that have acquired wisdom are literally suffering so long as they're not able to share it. Jinsk gives us another powerful tool of how to overcome this test to the point where a person can get to a level where people would never know that they've ever had a speech impediment or any type of speech problem. This is actually was the case as we mentioned briefly uh in our last uh part of the series was a problem that may al shalom had. Few people know that he used to have a chronic stutter to the point where he was incapable of even sharing a simple idea. While not everyone desires to become a worldrenowned speaker, everyone would love to have some level of improvement in their ability to communicate. Even if it's simply to communicate clearly with their spouse or with their kids to just tell them what to do. A lot of the times when people come to me with schlumbite problems or different issues that they have with people, I would say eight out of 10 times it's because of lack of communication. And lack of communication doesn't necessarily mean people don't talk. Lack of commun communication means that people don't understand each other. He wants one thing while the other person wants the same thing, but they're communicating it in such a different way. They don't realize they both want the same thing. or they don't realize that what they both want doesn't actually contradict each other. So tonight we're actually going to go into this and see what has to say. He's told us how there are studied ways way proven ways to overcome different obstacles whether it's a natural uh stubbornness, anger, laziness and uh most recently talked about you know the uh a person that has a level of being shy that's actually detrimental. It's a shy that's bad for him. Now he's going to talk about speech and the same exact solution as he says similarly a person who is unable to speak clearly and concisely should practice listening to his own words for 40 days whether he's speaking of mundane or holy things and when he's studying Torah this is because practicing anything makes it second nature now of course in his holy words he said a whole lot in very few words which we'll clarify as we've done throughout the entire series. What does it mean to study and speak time? What does it mean to overcome these uh obstacles? Does that mean that you're now going to be able to study better or perhaps maybe just say a sentence uh without a stutter? To what level of improvement can a person get to? And is it only with Torah? I mean he himself says whether it's mundane or holy things. So here we first have to understand that to overcome a a problem is never easy. So anyone that's looking for a quick fix, a quick solution uh is unfortunately dreaming. This is just like sometimes people think that uh you know their problem is going to be solved if they won the lotto. Their problem is going to be solved if they find the uh right person to marry. Their problem is going to be solved if they have a child. Their problem is going to be solved if they have a surgery. Their problem is going to be solved if they uh you know if they get this job. The reality is if you really have a problem there's no such thing as a quick solution. There's no such thing as a quick solution. The solution takes time, effort, and sacrifice. And is going to tell us about something that could literally improve a person's life. Their ability to do business, their ability to uh find somebody to marry, their ability to raise their children, their ability to teach, their ability to uh communicate in every aspect of their life. But one of the things that a person has to understand first is that what is a speech impediment? What is a of course there's the obvious when a person stutters or stammers where they have a they were born this way or sometimes it happens to people where uh where sometimes it's through they succeed in the world of Torah and to such a level that people put on them and all of a sudden at an older age 20 25 years old they begin stuttering they don't know how to communicate they don't know how to uh uh deliver their idea without saying a bunch of ums and ends and and and all types of things that uh unfortunately make them very difficult to listen to. We all know that Moshe Aenu had the worst possible speech impediment known to man. Yet Akadosh Bahu chose him to be the deliverer, the messenger, the loyal servant that uh brought Am out of Egypt and even more than that spoke to uh spoke to um Pero in such a way that Pero was afraid to even communicate with Mosher Rabenu. So the key is to understand that if a person has a problem, it's not necessarily always something that they're born with. Sometimes a person has an idea, but the way they communicate it is not understandable by by anybody other than themselves. Sometimes it's because they uh speak too fast. Sometimes it's because they speak too slow. There's this one particular speaker that uh I tell people to stay away from. He supposedly teaches Torah, but he goes against all of the on a regular basis and he has a level of arrogance I think is only uh uh comparable to people that are biblical times like Korak and uh other people like that. But nonetheless, this person speaks so slow. It's very hard for me to understand how anybody listens to him in 1x to listen to anything he says. You have to at least double it just to know that he's still human. But there are sometimes people that speak slowly because they simply cannot get their words out of their mouth. Sometimes people mumble where their brain works faster than their mouth and uh they start saying things thinking that they've already said it. In their mind everything is clear but when it comes out of their mouth nobody could understand. So the speech impediment is not just something that a person is naturally born with. Uh it's also something that a person could uh simply have just as a result of nervousness, anxiety or not really knowing how to communicate. One of the things that uh we see with aside from all of their teachings in Torah is that the greater they were, the more people followed their everyday life, everything they did, all of the different things that uh they they encountered, all of the different things they said. As the itself says that even their mundane conversations have to be studied. One of the famous giants of Torah in not just in the world of Kabad but also in the in the world in general in history was the roachon. The roachon uh is his full name was Rabi Rosen. He was such a brilliant mind that they say that he's he's written over 50,000 chuvot 50,000 responses. Something incomprehensible. When a person understands what even a single response is, it's impossible to even think someone being capable of writing 50,000 of them. Now the roachon had such a brilliant mind that the way that he would think was so fast that during the week he was only able to slow it down through writing. This made his Shabbat very difficult because you can't write on Shabbat. One of the uh that sat with him for breakfast one time saw that the roach had the same breakfast every day. Two grapes and a cup of milk. That was his breakfast. But he saw that as he put one grape in his mouth, he did not allow himself to swallow the grape until he went through the entire yushami because he had a kush in his mind. He had a new insight in his mind. He was going through the entire Talmud B entire Talmud Yami literally at such a fast speed you cannot even think to such a level. As a side note, he was actually the one that gave the to the just so you understand who we're speaking about here. And the roach had an intense mind and the only way that he could express his mind is through his writing. The problem was that because his mind works so fast, his writing was almost incomprehensible or sort of like cryptic because every few words you would say look up this source, this page, this number and such and such and look up this source at this such and such this page and a few more words and look up this source and toot and such and such. And every few words it would be another acronym of another source that his mind easily flowed from place to place, from island to island, from planet to planet. To him this was normal because his mind thought the entire Torah over at all times. So this made his work very difficult to such an extent that says that we don't pasin like the goon the roach the roach goon because uh he was uh difficult to understand and the way he wrote was very uh very difficult to understand sort of cryptic if you will. You have to literally dig into his mind to truly understand what he meant in certain things. But needless to say, everyone understood that this is a gaon. But one of the most surprising things about the roach of a gaon was the fact that he was a phenomenal speaker. He had a gift of speaking that was unbelievable. And he didn't speak the way he wrote. He spoke in a very clear fashion. You would understand what he said. you would understand his meaning, his speech was second to none. One of the reasons for that is because as brilliant as his mind was, his mouth could not catch up to it. So therefore, his mouth was able to slow down the ga's thoughts and deliver them in a fashion that everyone was able to understand. Shalom was had a golden tongue able to speak in such a way that if somebody has any type of ill feeling, bad mood, uh depression, uh any type of already know this is bad. This is checked and verified. Just listen to speak. It'll cheer you up. Even if you don't understand a single word he says he had such a beautiful way to speak in his earlier days would give shim to balim to regular people workers blue collar people and he would actually give them tests he didn't just give them a you know sh there's a story about this is okay I'll see you next week no he would give them tests he turned these balim these simple people into give them tests. And one of the times actually he noticed that one of the balim had a very very bright mind, very sharp. He spoke to him. He found the guy was a banker. Worked under he was a banker. He told him, "Come, you're wasting your your gift being a banker. Come be a dian. We'll teach you how to be a dian. I'll learn with you. I will make you a dian. Come learnish me banker. How am I going to make pan? Goes don't worry pan. You'll learn how to be a dan. You'll make panas. You'll be fine. Says he listened to me. We learned with him. He passed all the tests and he became dian. And now to this day, every time he sees me, he's oh, he is the rabbi that turned the banker into the dian. So happy, always smiling. He was a gon. The guy, the guy was a brilliant mind, but he was using his talents in the uh banking world. Noticed this and said, "You're wasting it. You could be a go in the Torah." Now anyone that has read some of the writings of Ra knows that his brilliant mind literally had no limits. When you read any one of his each chuva can easily be anywhere between 12 to 20,000 words. Just to give you some understanding, the average book that people read, they buy from the store could range anywhere from 50 to 100,000 books depending on what type of book it is. So each chuva, each answer to a specific question, the you would write could be anywhere between 10 to 20% of an entire book, but certainly a whole lot more wisdom than the entire book times a thousand. So the amount of wisdom that he had in his mind was incomprehensible. It's often they say the story of how when Rab used to go used to go on a radio show for people to call in and ask any questions that they wanted, he would not only answer the people's questions and he would mention the source after source after source of where you could verify everything that he said and literally they would count the sources. You would see literally dozens of sources off the top of his head as he's answering the question. And the the radio host would remind the listeners every few minutes that the Rav does not have any books in front of him. Everything is here. The brilliance in his mind was unbelievable. Yet Abu Tai his family says that the most difficult sh that he would give each week was the sh that he would give on Shabbat to the badim to the simple people. Now you would think if he's giving a sh to the ones that he has to explain to them the what he just wrote 15,000 words about the depth of it the corrections of the contradictions the settlement of the contradictions the answering of the different uh uh refutes all the different things you would think that would be the most difficult but no They said that the shabbat that he would give to the balim to the simple common people took him three hours every Shabbat to prepare three hours. Why? Because he would review every single thing and see okay we have to give aada some type of story that people like that's going to warm up their hearts and open up their hearts. maybe even say a nice joke. Joke to make people smile. He'd always say one one of his jokes were the best. He'd always say some type of a joke to make people laugh. Give them some mus. And then there's the part. But the part, I can't tell these people 15,000 words. They're not going to understand. What can I take away from it? What is not absolutely necessary? Which part of it is not absolutely necessary to tell them that they don't need or perhaps whatever I do keep how could I simplify it in such a way that every person would understand and he would toil and toil to literally minimize his mind to the average person in order to make sure that everyone came in one way but left another way full of Torah that they understood, full of Torah that they're able to implement in their lives. And again, we see another example of another goon that his mind was at a different level. When the journalist thought that he had a bad memory, as I told you guys in a story a few times a few years ago, that journalist was surprised when he saw that RaF literally knew every book in his library by heart. We're talking about tens of thousands of books. Every word by heart. Who can remember one book by heart? Even if you wrote the book literally his brilliance was not shown in those where he was able to express his and everything. The brilliance of how he can minimize himself to the average person too slow down his mind in order to be able to communicate pearls of wisdom that every person could really comprehend. Now most people do not have many pearls of wisdom. Let's just say that. But they certainly would love to be able to speak clearly to speak in such a way that the words come out of their wa their mouth fluently and in a fluid fashion without ums and ms and ah and h and let me think and all types of things that a person uses in order to buy more time. I remember when I had the business on Wall Street, one of the main things that I had to do is train the salespeople how to speak. How to speak to people because 99.9% of the business was done on the phone. And if you're not able to speak on the phone in such a clear way, guess what? You're not going to have time to offer what you want to sell. And one of the most difficult pe things for people to be able to do is to think fast enough to respond to any type of issue that the customer had or potential customer had. So what we did which is common in the industry it's not something we invented but certainly capitalized on and a uh I would say uh upgraded is giving people everything they're going to say ahead of time. Meaning giving the person the pitch, everything he's going to say, and also a list of responses for the most common issues that the customer or potential customer would possibly have. And of course, if things were were at a point where they're not able to answer it, they would ask me or would uh, you know, start speaking to the customer myself. But nonetheless, one of the things that you see really quickly is who had the gift. Who had the gift to speak. Some people literally the the the the donkey of of of uh of Bilam spoke better than them. Just did not have the ability to speak. Didn't matter how much you trained him. Didn't matter if you told them to read, if you told them to repeat, if you put them in a room and told them, "Repeat this a thousand times for the next week. I'm paying you to sit in a room and just repeat this thing every single day until you know by heart." Didn't make a difference. They simply you should have replaced him by a uh with a with a donkey. As long as it's a donkey of Bam, he could speak. Other people, you saw that they caught on quickly. They're able to catch on and not only catch on, they were able to improvise. They're able to do things. With those people, you have to be a little more careful. So, they don't if they don't have enough experience and knowledge, they don't necessarily know what to add. But nonetheless, some people have the gift where they know how to communicate. But the majority don't. I've trained over 100 150 or so people throughout my career. And I would say out of all of them maybe maybe 10% of them became as successful as they can be maybe. And one of the primary reasons of why somebody would succeed or fail in that particular business was communication. But that's the same in in many other businesses where it has to do with sales. It has to do with communications. You'd find that the uh the lawyers that are that have the best communication skills usually are the ones that are not only paid the best but are also the ones that are the ones that go to court the most often. Whereas the ones that are not very good at communicating usually sit behind a desk, usually try to settle, usually try to do things without really communicating much and certainly not communicating on the fly. The same concept goes with a lot of different professions. And communications is something that some people are gifted with and some people aren't. In fact, some people are given a speech impediment or fear of speeching, as we said, glossophobia. Regardless of what a person has, they could improve it. And of Leensk says that the way to improve it is by doing something before or practicing it before you say it for 40 days. This is not a new insight that we've never heard of before. Rather, this is something that goes back as far as the Talmud. The Talmud In the uh second section, fourth says, "Let yourself hear all of what Hashem commands of you so that your ears hear what your mouth is saying." This statement of let your ears hear what your mouth is saying is mentioned several times throughout the Talmud throughout the uh the zah the and many others. Sometimes it's as a form of rebuke where a person says something that contradicts what they're doing to let your ears hear what your mouth is saying. But he obios is saying if you want to serve Hashem to the fullest potential then you have to let yourself hear all of what Hashem commands. Means when you learn Torah, say it out loud. Don't be one of these people that learns to quietly. Whatever you're reading, say it out loud. Not because other people need to hear you, but because you need to hear you. The more you hear yourself learning Torah, the more you're going to understand the material. Number one, because you're now using multiple senses. You're not just using your eyes to read, but you're also using your speaking ability and you're now hearing yourself. Secondly, this when you're using multiple senses, that's like as if you're reading it three times. You're reviewing the same material three times, three different senses. The other aspect of it is that when you read it and you read it out loud, you also catch the mistakes that you're making faster. Whereas when you read it just with your eyes, sometimes you could misunderstand something for several pages and sometimes even the entire book and only realize that the person that you thought was one was in reality something else. Had you read it out loud, certainly you would have discovered that this mistake happened. So says, "Let yourself hear all of what Hashem commands of you so your ears can hear what your mouth is saying." Now, what causes people to stutter, to stammer, to have any type of speech impediment or flaw? One of the things is because their brain works much faster than their mouth. Their ability to speak is becomes deficient as a result of them thinking that they've already said something before they actually said it. Or sometimes they think so fast that they try to have their mouth compete with their thoughts. So they end up speaking too fast or mumbling. This is common by the way when people make blessings. You see when people make blessings sometimes you have no idea what they just said. You think maybe they gave you a compliment, maybe they cursed you. Maybe they uh you know they just sneezed. You're not really sure. And then they ask you, "Why'd you say amen?" Oh, that was a blessing. Oh, okay. Okay. Sorry. Sorry, I didn't know that was a blessing. I thought it was a sneeze. What? What' you do? No, I said Oh, that was gein. Oh, I thought it was Abu. Okay. All right. No problem. Amen. Sometimes a person speaks so fast because they're used to the words or because their brain is used to it. Another place in the The Talmudi, of course, the Talmud that has all seven levels of wisdom in it, only hated by fools and ignorance that are typically anti-semitic that have never read the Talmud other than the excerpts that they see online that other anti-semites that have never read or studied the Talmud highlight and misunderstand and misinterpret. But nonetheless, the Talmud in page 38 says on the verse that's in the Torah, which means and you shall teach them thoroughly, teach your children and grandchildren the Torah thoroughly. What is it referring to? It is says that because you have to make sure that the words of Torah should be sharply honed in your mouth. The words of Torah have to become so clear to you that they become sharply honed in your mouth as if like it's a sword. such that if a man asks you something concerning a point of Torah knowledge, you'll be able to answer without stammering before answering him. Rather, you will answer him immediately. Just like said in Proverbs chapter 7 verse number four, say to wisdom, you are my sister. Meaning just as you know clearly that the Torah forbids you from marrying your sister, wisdom is also known to you clearly. But what can we do that there are times yet that although a person knows Torah, he has studied, he has read, he has heard, he knows the subject well, but he doesn't know how to express it. He doesn't know how to express the words either. has all of these buying time expressions. Um, m, m, all these different sounds that people subconsciously make without realizing. Or he communicates too fast or in a fashion that's not understandable by anybody other than him. Or he speaks too slowly to the point where people fall asleep by the time he completes a sentence. or he stammers, he stutters in so many words. He's not able to communicate even though he knows the subject for that person says you have a solution. What is the solution? Practice listening to your own words for days because practice turns into second nature. You want to say something, you want to say a story, you want to say kush, you want to say the weekly Torah portion, but nobody wants to listen to you. No problem. From now on, every time you study, study out loud. Hear yourself. Find the mistakes. See where you need improvement. You want to say a speech, practice the speech. Not once or twice or three times or five times like some people do before a sum or before a wedding or before some type of an event. But every day for 40 days. Every day for 40 days. One of the great things that a person can do to overcome the fear of being speaking in public is not only speaking and hearing themselves speak but do it in front of a mirror. Watch yourself speak. There you will see not only what you say but how you say it. The facial expressions. Do you want people to see that face or a different face? Do you want to emphasize something? Do you want to say something where you get people's attention? Sometimes you can do it by raising your voice. Sometimes you can do it by whispering. Sometimes you can do it by speaking really fast to make sure that everybody pays attention because what just happened? And sometimes you could slow down to the point where people are forced to listen closer just trying to figure out why is he speaking so slow. These are different types of skills that a person could hone over time. But without having the knowledge, there's nothing to talk about. Furthermore, even if one has the knowledge without having the ability to express the knowledge in a way that everyone else could understand, then the lecture is only for themsel. So says if you want to improve your speech impediment regardless of the reason and we'll provide proof for regardless of the reason start practicing every single day for 40 days. How much? A lot. What's a lot? a whole lot depending on the difficulty. The more you practice, the more you will hone their skills, the more you'll be able to communicate in such a fashion that you will even enjoy your own speech. Now, certainly, as I've said already multiple times, speaking is something that some people have as a gift from heaven. We always hope that those people use that for the right reasons. Unfortunately, most good speakers do not use it for good reasons. Rather, they use it for the opposite. Some people use it to make a living. Whether it's public speakers, it's a people that give speeches and get hundreds of thousands of dollars per speech, people that communicate their ideas on TED talks, people that are simply a delight to hear, a delight to listen to. All types of speakers are out there and you'll find that the ones that are usually the most successful are able to express their emotions in such a way that they make the crowd, the audience feel their words. Meaning they're not just educating them, they're manipulating their hearts. This is a skill that takes a lot of time and practice to hone. But needless to say, it cannot be the first thing that you worry about. The first thing you have to be worried about is simply delivering the idea you have in such a format that it's clear, it's concise and it's a pleasure to listen to. This is the first part. Now if you have a fear of speaking the idea of speaking in front of people is terrifying to you. It's something like what are you talking about me speaking to to somebody already you get so nervous that you start stuttering and this is not to make fun. This is a reality that some people have such a fear of speaking that just the thought that they have to speak in front of people creates such anxiety they start twitching. They start having a nervous breakdown. One of the most extraordinary stories I've heard in my entire life is the one I'm about to tell you. I told you a brief part of it last week or a couple of weeks ago, but today we're going to go a little deeper into the words of the Mazal. In the book of memories of Ra Maz called Levan in page 58 Muz himself writes about the time when he was 14. This is what he wrote when he was 14. 14year-old kid that is dealing with a problem that seems impossible. And he writes as follows. I have four reasons of why I was born with a stutter. one meaning that his parents were both related in some way where the the fathers were related. So that could be some type of genetic issue. Not incest at all. Not something that was forbidden. Still sometimes when families even a cousins or distant cousins marry sometimes there is genetic issues to being born during World War II. A woman is known to be emotional regardless, but the emotions and hormones are exponentially higher when she's pregnant. And when there is something traumatic like the war, certainly this could affect the uh the baby inside. Ramuz was born during World War II. Number three, I was born a month after His brother died. He had an eight-year-old brother who was a genius and he died tragically just a month before Ra Mazus was born. If the trauma of the war was not enough, the trauma of losing a child certainly would be. And number four, the fact that most boys are similar to their mother as the sages teach. Most boys that are born take a likings towards or are similar to the mother's family, the mother's brothers. And therefore he says I inherited a small part of the intellect of my uncle who was a goon himself but I only inherited a small part he says and most of his speech impediment I studied a lot I wrote a lot many and un and unveiled many clarifications that were bright and correct with dawa I wrote count about dik. This is the vowization the most difficult thing in my opinion that's in the world of of of uh of language regardless of what language he at 14 years old he already wrote a kress about dikt about ibu which is the renewal of the moon most people in the world don't even understand it I'm talking about even the world of tawat he wrote already a kris about the renewal of the moon about mathematics few people know that Mazuz published multiple mathematical principles that are still used to this day about architecture and beautiful principles regarding several subjects in addition to the that are deep and rich and even a few responses and clarific ifications on important works that gave me a straight mind that gets deep into the subject matter in order to explain it well. Here we're talking about a 14-year-old ga that achieved more in the world of Torah at the age of 14 than people would achieve in multiple lifetimes. And this is what he writes himself. But it's a shame that all of this toil may shalom go to waste because he can't speak. And now he's pleading to Hashem. If you just take away 90% of the knowledge and leave me with just a little bit, 10%. And grant me the ability to speak clearly in the merit of those 90%. And the courage to speak my truth, that will be good for me. Here you see a 14-year-old ga servant of Hashem saying all of this wisdom that you gave me I can't share it with anybody so no one would ever know take away 90% of it just leave me 10% so at least I could share something and give me the courage to speak the truth it's not enough to know the truth there are many people that know the truth but are too scared too scared to go after the truth. This is why I tell people don't complain to me about the heresy that Manis Freedman is doing in your community or Yaz online unless you have given out at least a hundred of these books. If you haven't gone to our Kiru store and got yourself a few of these boxes to distribute at least a hundred of these books in your community, especially since it's free, don't complain about heresy from Manis Freedman. Don't complain that your brother, your sister, your your cousin are following heresy. Don't complain. Why? You're at fault. You're not willing to fight Amalik. Not only have we published 25,000 books, we're providing them for free. We're paying even for shipping, but yet people are scared. Oh no, I don't want to be in. Oh, I don't know who's going to want it. Oh, I don't know if this. Oh, maybe this, maybe that. Fools, you have an opportunity to fight Amalik and you're thinking twice. That's how smart Amalech is. He's convinced he people that he doesn't even exist. Back to what we were saying at 14 years old is crying out to take 90% of the wisdom and knowledge that you've given me. Leave me with 10 and in the merit of those 90% give me the ability and the courage to speak the truth. I'm only I'm your lowly poor servant who's making the ruling so to avoid that no one will ever know of me. meaning the Torah that he has didn't say the one who learns meaning for the sake of heaven the Torah will give him solutions leadership ability to judge but I'm missing all of these due to my many sins what sins did he have time to make at 14 years old when he's making about every subject under the sun whether secular subjects or Torah, but he knows this is something apparently I'm at fault. God's not at fault. I'm at fault. Not like the fools that think, "Oh, if if God is so merciful, how come he made this and this happen?" Fool, you don't realize that everything that Hashem does is for good had such a chronic speech impediment. He says, "I do not have any of these abilities." Why? Miscan, he couldn't even give ideas. He couldn't give advice to people because of the chronic stutter that he had. Imagine being full of wisdom without a way to express it. I don't believe there's anything that could be greater suffering. If you truly understand it where comes to he sent to be from Isra and he says this is a it was a punishment for him to go into the exile. You have to go into the exile for seven years and over there don't tell them you're don't say anything. So he came to the Shiva ofan and before the sh the famous sh ofan he learned with everybody over there with the ofan and the student ofan and during the sh with everything that said he had a question about contradiction about an answer out. Whoa, who is this new guy? This lion. So immediately before the shuish comes to tells him a lion has come. A lion has come. Lion has come. So they put him in the front row. Now in those days the front row was for the ultimate scholars. Someone that's lesser goes to the next row. Lesser next row. There were seven rows. And the Ravan was sitting on seven pillows. And each time he somebody would ask a question or bring a contradiction to what the RV says that is valid, he would advance a row and the Rav would have one of the pillows taken away. So started speaking and he saw that this lion is not saying anything. What kind of lion is this? So I guess he's not at the level to understand the first level of Tawraat that I said. So take him back a row. So during the lecture they stop. They tell him listen sorry we have to go. You have to go back a level. He goes back a level continues again. No questions. He's not asking any questions or bringing any refutes toan. Why? Because his rabbi told him not allowed. You're allowed to talk to them while there's there's the outside, but the main sh quiet. Don't tell them you're he continues. No questions. Stops again, another row, goes down another row. This continues for seven rows all the way where he's in the back with the regular people. But Capella says, "Let this be this silence that I just suffered be the equivalent of seven years of exile." And now he told, "Rabbi, when you first started the show, you mentioned such and such." And he brings him a reputation. Kanan surprised. He's right. bring him up a row and take away one of the pillows of and then you also said such and such. He's right again. Bring him up another row, take away another pillow. And he does this all the way back to the front row to the point where he's sitting in the front and is sitting on the floor. No more pillows. The suffering that he had not being able to speak was unbearable. So a person imagine a person is full of wisdom, full of ideas, full of diamonds but he cannot share it with anyone. May Maz says this chronic stutter that he had was something so unbearable he was willing to give up 90% of the gifts Hashem gave him just to be able to speak so he could share some of his Tua. And then he continues and he says, "How could I be comforted? Because didn't Hashem show himself to Mosheu, his chosen one, to go bring the plagues upon P? And Moshe was reliable and loyal to go bring the plagues and rebukes upon Pero and therefore I will continue to do the will of Hashem and keep his mitzvot because in the end honor will come. Here he says despite the fact that he cannot find any other place to be comforted, he's lacking every possibility of being able to express any of his ideas, any of his advice, any of his insights. He says, "The only thing that gave me comfort was knowing that our leader Musher Rabenu, he was also with a speech impediment, but yet Hashem chose him and he chose well because he was the reliable shepherd. So I will continue to serve Hashem and do his will because in the end certainly the salvation will come. And later on Maz writes I was saved from this stuttering because I would speak out the many that I read and wrote. He constantly read out loud whether he was reading from a book or he's reading his own writing. Everything he did out loud to the point where eventually took away the stutter. Thisai is not known to most people because throughout life we've heard him speak so much that they published an entire set of books just on his shim that he gave on deep topics of the Talmud just from writing what he wrote entire set huge Thousands and thousands of pages of deep concepts and teachings of the Talmud and many other subjects and many more will come. Dozens of books from his speech. His speech was beautiful. Who was friendly with um one of the very close of of Mazus who told him once that Rahuz used to have a special way to help his students that would stutter. where a person could be perfectly normal, not have any type of physical disability, but at some point in their life, 15, 20, 25, all of a sudden they're or anxiety, whether it's or even the rabbi, they develop this stutter, this stammer, this inability to communicate. And the RV knew exactly how to calm them down. How to calm the TMI down by telling them to slow down and they sing a song. Sing a song. Yes, I wrote a song and I want you to sing it. This song is about taking a deep breath. And I translated the words of the song so you could you guys could understand it. And it goes like this. Breathe deeply and relax. Breathe deeply and be released. Breathe deeply. One more time. Breathe deeply and take some breath. Breathe deeply and don't be scared. Always trust in El Kabir, the powerful God. Breathe deeply and be healthy like a lion and a night's horse. A lion is which he he writes the gimat of is raam and a knight's horse is sus which the gimatia for that is great success and abil is the same words as bi healthy he even writes commentary on the songs that he writes breathe deeply and be strengthened breathe deeply and overcome Today this person that told the story to Rabime who used to have a stutter does not have it anymore. And like I said many of the maz had that had this anxiety had this fear had this glossophobia had this issue with speaking whether it was they were born with it or developed it later on. They're able to overcome it simply by understanding that they could overcome it and practicing what they said before they said it. Now, one of the things that often leads to a person stuttering is they're anxious. And one of the leading reasons of why a person develops anxiety is because they're not prepared. They're not prepared with the words that they want to say. They're not as fluid with the topic. They're not as sure of their cause. They're not as sure of their argument. And therefore, they feel like people are not going to believe them. But if a person prepares not only by studying but also by speaking it this in itself can improve their communication skills exponentially. Now, one of the things I also saw that certainly is related to this is how people use their mouth. Meaning the words that come out of your mouth. In fact, not only does the choice of words that come out of your mouth show whether a person has the ability to communicate or not, but the words that come out of a person's mouth show whether that person is humble or at least on the way to humility or not. In the in the gate of humility chapter 6, the Rav says there are six there there are 10 rules of conduct that a master of humility should observe. Here he's telling us that if a person wants to acquire humility, he has to have these 10 things. And I'll briefly say the first few just to get to the point. One is obtaining the knowledge of God and his goodly attributes and a superiority that he bestowed on man over all other living creatures. So in so many words, know what Hashem said, know the Torah. You don't know the Torah, humility is impossible. Two, one should know the duties prescribed by the Torah and those called by the intellect. Meaning not only know that God exists, but know what he commands of you. Without knowing what your purpose in life is, what your role in life is, humility is impossible. Three, one should for the sake of the of the creator may be exalted tolerate and bear patiently with hateful words and deeds. Meaning people are going to insult you at some point or another. If you ever want to have a chance of succeeding in humility, certainly you have to be able to tolerate this. Needless to say, if you want to succeed in business or in any part of career, you also have to tolerate this. Why? Because there is going to come a time where on your way to success, you will fail. The difference between people that are extremely successful and people that are not is the people that are extremely successful were continued to get up after they failed. Whereas the people that are not successful chose to stop getting up after they failed. Everyone fails. The question is whether you're going to fail on the way to success or you're just going to fail. So if a person wants to achieve humility, they not only have to accept failure, but even accept when what they're doing is viewed as failure even when it's not. They just simply choose to insult you, make fun of you, make fun of the way you speak, make fun of the way the words the words that you choose, make fun of the way you look, make fun of what you have, what you don't have, and so on. You have to be able to tolerate it. Four, this is the one that I wanted to mention. One should act kindly towards other people and speak well of them. Judge them favorably, not maligning them and forgive them for speaking ill of him and disparaging him even if they don't deserve it. Here is where true humility comes in. What the Rabb is saying, the is saying a thousand years ago that to attain humility, not only do you have to accept and tolerate hateful words and deeds that people do to you, but those that do it to you, if the opportunity arises, act kindly towards them. Help them anyway. Speak well of them. Judge them favorably. And then he goes on into saying that this doesn't only apply to how you should speak about them, but about anything. Learn how to speak good about people and about things. And he gives an example about one of the who passed by a carcass of a dog that was on the street with a few of his students. And this dead animal gave a foul odor. The disciples said to him, "Oh, how dreadfully does this carcass smell?" And he said to them, "How white are its teeth?" And the students quickly realized that they made a mistake by only noticing the awful smell of the dead animal rather than noticing something that's good. Not because the bad smell doesn't exist, but rather because they realized they have accustomed themselves to see negativity in everything rather than looking for something positive. The sadik's intention says the was to chastise his students in order so that they don't accustom themselves to speaking evil lest it become part of their nature. So too if they trained themselves to speak favorably of others, this would become second nature to them. As David says in chapter 15:3, he did not accustom his tongue to slander. Or on the opposite end, it says, "Your tongue thinks of injuring like a sharpened razor that works deceit. You love all injurous words." Or further it says a treacherous tongue. What will it give you? What will it add to you? Some people they only have the ability to speak clearly if it's insulting someone. If it's something negative, this is not a speaking ability. This is a deformity of character. I find it that sometimes people only watch part of the lectures where a wicked person is exposed. But when it comes to the teachings of of developing character traits of giving taka, of helping of doing better, those words either are unheard or they simply ignore them as if they don't apply to them. The way you know whether you're developing in the world of Torah is whether your character is developing, not just your knowledge. There are plenty of people that have an enormous amount of knowledge but are considered worse than a dead animal in the middle of the street. The Gh says a Torah scholar that has bad character traits is worse than a dead animal in the street. That's what the Sadik was trying to teach his students. Don't be worse than this dead animal by being someone that's constantly looking at negative. If all you can say about your brother, your sister, your mother, your father, your colleague, your neighbor is negative things, usually the problem is you. Usually the problem is you. Why would Hashem give you the ability to speak well if all that comes out of your mouth is negative? Now on the other hand, a person would read this if they would stop here, they would think, wait, so if you have to speak only good about people, doesn't that mean that you're not allowed to expose the heretics and say things about the manus freedmans of the world? This is why we don't stop reading there. The Rav says there's 10 things, not five, not four. We go to number nine. For the honor of the creator, one should take revenge against the wicked. One's practice of forgiving others in personal matters should not lead him to be forgiven when it comes to God's matters or towards anyone who speaks against his prophets, his pious ones or treasured people. When one takes advantage of another, he should not be forgiven as he is when he himself is wronged. Rather, he should come to the rescue of the oppressed and help free him from the hand of the oppressor. As it is written by the prophet Jeremiah, chapter 21:12, "Execute justice in the mornings and deliver the rob from the hand of the oppressor." Or the prophet Job says in chapter 29:1 17, "I broke the teeth of the wrongdoer." He should instruct others in the service of God, rebuke them and make them feel ashamed. He should urge them to write conduct and warn them against evil with his hand and with his tongue according to his ability. In so many words, do kiru. Help people do chuva. If you're able to do with money, do with money. If you're able to do with speech, do with speech. If you're able to do it with distributing books, do it with do with distributing books. Whatever you can do, you must do. Why? To help people do chuv and also to fight the wicked. These are two completely separate mitzvot that you're obligated to have. And if you think that maybe you're not at the level or maybe you're just too humble or maybe you're just too this, you're fooling yourself because this is one of the requirements to acquire humility is to fight the wicked and defend the oppressed. He should hasten to exact God's judgment from one who has incurred them and he should not be humble or meek in doing so as it says of Pinas in Taleim 106 verse 30 31. Then Pinas stood up and did justice and the plague was arrested. This was counted to him as a merit from generation to generation forever. In number 10, he says he should not utter any falsehood or keep company with merry makers, jokesters or delight with worldly pleasures in which the vulgar delight. Here the helps us distinguish a few things. Number one, he shows us that in order for us to merit the ability to speak, we have to know how to choose our words. How? When it comes to decent people, good people, be as generous as possible when it comes to compliments. When it comes to Hashem's creation, be as generous as possible when it comes to good words, to compliments. When it comes to Hashem, be as generous as possible when it comes to gratitude. On the other hand, when it comes to wicked people that are enemies of God, that spread heresy, that are missionaries to idolatry, that mock the Torah or its sages, those people, you have an obligation as a Jew to fight them, not physically, but rather in any other way that will cause to them to either slow down or for people not to fall for their trap. Whichever you can do, do. And if you could do both. And those that think that they are not spreading or they're not they don't want to get in the middle of or they're not sure. You're simply fooling yourself. Simply fooling yourself. The obligation to fight the wicked is upon all of us. If you have the ability to speak because Hashem has granted you the heavenly gift, by all means, use it. Speak to your family. Speak to your friends. Speak to whoever will be willing to listen to you. If you don't have the ability to speak, you now have a way to work on it as you study the material. You read the book, you watch the lectures, repeat it to yourself over and over again for 40 days. Not just this, but everything else that you study that's dua and things that are good. Repeat what you're saying over and over again. Watch yourself in the mirror as you do it. Correct your mistakes. You could even record yourself. Then listen and see where the flaws are. See where the mistakes are. See where the improvement could be necessary. See where a fluctuation of voice could help deliver the message. It all depends on your skills. Initially, you should just simply be able to deliver it in a concise and pleasant manner. Once you've achieved that, then you could even elevate it by fluctuation fluctuation of voice, raising your voice, lowering your voice, whispering, all the different skills that a person can use as a speaker. But use it. Hashem gave you a mouth to use it, not just to complain. I know that that may disappoint some of you because you like to complain a lot. But I promise you, Hashem did not give you mouth to complain. The proof, Hashem almost destroyed Am 10 times in the desert because of complaints. Because of complaints, complaints about the mana, complaints about no meat, complaints about the bitter waters, complaints about this, complaints about that. Constant complaints. Hashem is not a fan of complainers. Don't complain about the heretics if you're not helping fight them. Don't be surprised if a heretic doesn't show up in your family if you sit silently because you don't want to fight or you're too scared to fight the heretics. So use those skills that you have to fight the heretics. Now, while you are not able to hone those skills yet, or you haven't yet, Hashem has provided you another way to fight the heretics. And that is the book that I mentioned to you multiple times, distributing it to every Hebrew speaker in your community in every way that you possibly can. Because as much as this fight is ours, it's yours, too. Whether you are a rabbi or a student, male or female, if you have Hebrew speakers in your community, they should have this book in their hand with a strong recommendation by you to read it. From there, they will not only learn about the heresy of Manis Freedman, but they'll also learn the laws of They're also going to learn the of when you are obligated to protest and when you have to be silent. When it's a mitzvah to say something publicly and when it's a mitzvah to stay silent. For those who read it, they're not just impressed by the enormous amount of work that was put into it, but they're also impressed by the breath of knowledge that's in this small book. The only ones that have said anything that's I wouldn't say negative but not positive or not motivating simply are people that never read it from cover to cover. Why? Because if you understood the significance of the problem, you'd know that fighting amal is a mitzvah from we are all obligated and this is fighting amalik. So either you have the skill to speak and you should speak against heresy against the heretics. you don't have the skill, you now have a way to hone that skill, acquire that skill. Especially that you could also use that skill for many other things, especially since it's also going to encourage you to be more positive about the things that come out of your mouth in the right places. But last but not least, you could also use that body that you have instead of it just being another cow in the world that goes from place to place just to eat and drink and sleep. You could use that body of yours and hand people a book and tell them listen highly recommended. That's it. You have to tell them who, what, when, how. Highly recommended, giving it in their hands. That's it. I can tell you this since we've gotten the bookm uh Israel, few thousand books in America. We actually have one family took upon themselves to distribute uh 300 books just in one community, just in one community. Another couple of people took upon themselves also distribute about 150 books just in their community and they're looking to do more in other communities. There are some smart people out there that realize the significance of the problem. But then there is those that think that AML is somebody else's problem. Think that AMC may not even be a problem. I surprise you that sometimes those that deny the problem are a bigger part of the problem than you could imagine. Either way, who gave us the tools, the ability to speak, to communicate, to improve, and to share. More and more people will realize they have the responsibility to do the same. Thank you very much for learning with me. Hashem bless each and every single one of you that takes this to heart and applies it to their life. For those that want to donate and support, you can go to bzantashem.org. You can help us continue printing more and more books and do more lectures and continue doing all the amazing things that we're doing. And of course, those that are able to distribute can go to kirutore.org and get the book to your community in Israel or in the United States or in Canada. There's a uh couple of people over there that are distributing a few hundred books as well as we speak. So for that and will continue to succeed fighting in Amalech and most importantly getting closer and closer to Hashem and bringing as many people with us as we possibly can. Called [Music] toem but we need him with all of our soul man. [Music] We are meant to be a light unto the nations, not to follow their misguided practices. Remember, every Jew has to remember that he's a Jew and she's a Jew. We don't celebrate non-Jewish holidays, even if they seem harmless. It's a zil disrespect to the Torah and could lead to chal Hashem, desecration of God's name. Stick to our holy Torah and our own holidays. That's the path of a true Jew.