Rabbi Yaakov Nadel: Pharaoh and the Yetzer Hara - Learning from Yetzias Mitzrayim How to Break Free

thank you to the kazakh organization for inviting me to give this year and thank you everybody for joining this shivamshir i'd like to dedicate this year for rabbi avram torski he's been instrumental in helping guard your eyes in so many ways so i wanted to uh speak to you guys tonight about there's many parallels between uthiaz mitzrayim and our struggle with the tahara we're in middle of shaiva him now you know so why is shaivim a time for chuva and tikka nabris why specifically now these weeks so these are the weeks when we read about ethereus mitraim and it says in the safari that what we read down on this world is man in the worlds above so it's a time that's very misugal to leave mitzrayim during these weeks so you may ask we're not in mitzrayim what do you mean to leave mitzrayim so that's what i wanted to talk about a little um you know the plastic says every single jew is going to have to come to their ultimate tikkun by hook or by crook everybody's going to get there in the end some people will get there the easy way through the path of the torah which hashem uh gave us the torah to to make it easy for us you know choose life but if not sometimes we have to get hit on the head till uh we you know find our way to where we need to get to as as the muscle famous muscle with the gps you know keeps rerouting us the gps only has our best interest in mind obviously and the gps would never do anything to harm us obviously and yet you know every time we make a wrong turn it takes longer and it has to reroute us sometimes it takes us through difficult territory you know but it's always trying to find the fastest way to get to get us to where we need to get to so it's the same with akareshwarahu you know when we take take the wrong turn sometimes in life so he has to reroute us but he's always trying to get us to where we need to in the fastest and quickest path so breaking our nature is not an easy thing to do and um often we need to go through a lot of nasionus and a lot of trials and tribulations to purify our neshama and and bring us to the ticken and full potential that we can reach so we mentioned yatias mitsrayim every day a few times 50 times mentioned in the torah utilize because it's relevant to us all the time it's really a muscle to life you know paris is like the eight sahara he wants to keep us in mitzrayim which is um the word mitzrayim is a lotion of it's like boundaries like we say on shabbos without boundaries an inheritance without boundaries so mitraim and mitsarim are the same words basically the same letters so eretz mitzrayim means eretz a lotion of rotsen desires with a limitation basically means desires with the limitation that's the nature of the physical world a person's hungry they eat and they're full you know they can't continue having pleasure from food after a certain point like an empty cup once it's you know you fill it up it's full but with spiritual pleasures it's called the nachala belimitsarim there are no boundaries no limits it's infinite in nature and hashem wants to give us infinite pleasure not limited so he wants us to leave mitsrayams and to you know go for the real thing so we all have in us this story of mitzrayim both the paris and the jewish people both of them and we can look at the the marcus and see some incredible parallels between you know the ten marcus and the who's uh the power the power inside of us so hashem wants to wake us up and he sends us the first naka let's say damn right so he sends us a test or some suffering and at first the hour ignores it like we see by para he says he turned around he went home and he didn't pay attention to the maquis dam he just ignored it so then hashem sends another makkah to us to wake us up you know and something starts to waken up inside of us far daya so pari asks he says to moshe hashem take away these threading from me and i'll send you you could go go to you know sacrifice to your god but it's just words he's not really ready to let us go the power inside of us isn't ready to let the jew inside of our hearts to leave mitra him and to serve hashem so then hashem sends kinim and and then khartoum tell him wow they see the hand of hashem they see the finger of hashem we start to see hashem more in our lives he's speaking to us but we still are not ready you know to to really let go of our self-will then comes our of the wild animals and parry calls to moisture and he says go go serve go sacrifice to your god means in the land don't leave you can serve hashem but stay in mitzrayim you know stay in your ratsane herits again is a lushen of rotsen you can serve hashem just like those who serve by dezara they're really not serving anything they're serving themselves they're only serving the idol for their own sake so paris says you can serve hashem like that serve hashem but stay in your own retinus so what does maisha answer malaysia says it's impossible to do that giving up our desires our wilt hashem is really the the diametric opposite of what mitsrayam stands for we can't stay in our ratson and sacrifice hashem it doesn't make sense it's an oxymoron so after that paris says okay i'll let you serve hashem a little um you can do some mitzvos don't go too far as soon as you're done davening or learning come back to mitraim continue being steeped in our own will you know that's what the atar says to us okay fine i'll let you go serve hashem a little but don't go far but even this he wasn't really ready to do because when it's not real it's not real so we get hit again endeavor he hardened his heart and didn't let the people out and come by slave power and hashem his heart again and he didn't listen to them what does it mean hashem was his heart you know if para is really inside of us if it's really the eight taharah why would hashem harden our hearts why would he do that to us now the answer is very deep it's because hashem knows when we're ready or we're not ready yet really to let go we might want to serve hashem to avoid suffering but he knows it's not going to last because it's still just for ourselves so what he does is he hardens our heart so he can continue to humble us and teach us who's really in charge and then bharat comes the the hail with the fire and pari finally says hashem the person starts to see the evil inside of him he starts to see the lies of the atara for what they really are and paris says i'll let you go i'll let you go you won't and have to stay anymore but he doesn't really mean it again comes the locus arbe and he starts to break he says okay go go but who's going so maisha says everyone you know everyone's gonna go so power gets angry and he says no way hashem only the strong people should go only the gevarim giver is a lotion of strength of like you know when you're feeling it when you're feeling strong in navedos hashem when you really feel that inspiration okay that's when you could go serve hashem but you know it's not for the wives and for the daughters and for the children in other words when we're not really feeling it when we're not feeling that strength and whatever that that's not for you you know so maisha says no way we're all going to go serve hashem all a part of us even our physical our time and our bukka and that power he can't take anymore he says get out of here right garish is the darkness and you know we start to feel that tremendous darkness and we realize there's no way we have to serve hashem there's no way out of this finally paris breaks and says okay go go serve hashem leave your animals in mitzrayim he says i let you go i let your children go your wives everything whether you're feeling it or not but at least the animal aspects of your lives leave those in the trying leave those for me what does that mean in other words when you're eating when you're sleeping when you're doing physical acts that should be for yourselves when you need to serve hashem okay so go serve hashem but when you act physically in this world that you should leave him it's ryan what does moishe answer him is welcome you also will give us you're going to give us also carbonis in other words through the atara and through the physical acts in the world that we live in we're going to serve hashem the hall of awkward with both of your utarim and then moisha says to him from there we're going to take to serve hashem from our bahamas from the struggle with the torah we're going to serve hashem hashem in all your ways okay that's too much for power he says get out of here i'll testify thomas if you come back to me again you're going to die so hashem finally makes makkah and every jew has to come to this by hook by crook has to be broken the ego has to be broken until paris finally says hashem like you spoke take also your animal natures and go and go see in other words atari realizes that through our using the physical world to serve hashem um we actually uplift the eight sahara we give the tahara his tikkun so that was the first parasha of boy now we're holding by bashar allah and bashar allah is when we come to the yamazov the question is if yatia's midtrain symbolizes our struggle with the atahura and finally we we break free of mitraim and we're you know following hashem into the midbar why did they even need to go through this whole process of kriyasyamsov i thought they already you know broke free pari let them out and why did power change his mind you know and what was what was he thinking and lastly why does it say rahib isha para yasam when pare sends out to people paris sent out the people i mean didn't hashem force him to harry didn't do it from his own will so why does it say as if it was his decision so to understand the answer to these questions understand the depth of what the terror is telling us here you see the first place that the the yidden went to after they left the time was called sukhois and sukhas means that they came under the kanfe ashrino hashem went before them by day with the on and by night with the fire come after me in the mid bar hashem says in a place that's without food trust in me just follow me into the wilderness let go of your own will after hundreds of years in mitzrayim you know the atahara finally saw he has no choice to let us serve hashem but it's it's really not easy to let go of our self-will when we try to let go of the itsahara and we finally say okay we're leaving the time we're going now after hashem into the midbar the yatar reawakens and he says oh my gosh mazza is what did we do here that we let the yidden out of mitzrayim how could we have done that he took 600 charity at 600 as the gemachi of sheker he took with himself after the eden what what what did he take what was the sheikah that parry took the root of all sheker is that there's another valid will hashem has his will and i have my will that's the root of all sheker now the atari uses taiva and covet and all these things as like a bribe to get us to believe that there's also a valid will besides hashem like if you give a judge a bribe your goal is not to get the judge to take the bribe your goal is to get the judge to twist the judgment so when the atari uses taiva and covet and these things he's not his goal is not that we should just have taiva his goal is that is that we should believe the sheker that my will is also valid that is not just hakadosh baruch and that's what paris chased after the yiddan with that sheker with the 600 chariots which is gematria sheker he's he's running after us and saying how could we have let the inaudible how can we let go of our self-will as if my will doesn't mean anything and the yidantaka felt this this pain and they said to moshe what have you done to us to take us out of its triumph we told you let us serve it yes it's not pleasant to be a slave to our own yet saharas but if we let go of ourselves our self will will surely die so it's better to let us stay in its ryan then we should die in the midburg uh paris was getting closer and the lotion of hickory because at that point we realized there's no escape from the tahra our very nature we can't live without our self-will and if we do we feel would will drown in the sea the sea is in front of us power is chasing after us and that's when we realize that only hashem can save us you see the 10 mark has convinced us that we have no choice in our own self-interest it's better to serve hashem but paris still thought that he let us out that's why it says we still think that it's our choice that that we're the ones deciding that it's worth it for us we still want to hold on to our self-will a little bit and hashem played along the vulcan they looked like they're confused hashem wanted to give paris this illusion that he could still change his mind and that his will was still a factor and we come to the sea and we're stuck and we really have no way to let go we're between a rock and a hard place you know in the 12-step program for people who are addicted to all types of bad behaviors it's a known thing that the only way for them to really learn how to let go and let hashem help them is when they hit bottom they have to really hit bottom and realize that they're stuck there's no way out and the kriyas yamsuf was really hitting bottom for chloe's role there was this true recognition that on the one hand we're being chased by our self-will and we can't escape it and on the other hand if we if we let go of it we're going to drown in the yam there was nowhere for us to go and that recognition gave us a tremendous kayak of of dependent tankers just go now what does that mean why are you crying out to me isn't this the ultimate time to cry out to you when we feel completely stuck so i was thinking that maybe the purpose of tefillah is to bring us to that haqqara in other words why do we dive in when we need something it's to ingrain inside of us that only hashem can can can do it for us we really can't do anything ourselves so we dive in and we dive in until we ingrain this idea into ourselves and that's when our tree list can really have an impact now since the yiddin reached this recognition on their own they were so cognizant of this of being chased by their self-will on the one hand and not being able to let go of it on the other hand at that point they didn't even need fila anymore because they already had the tactless of tila they already had that complete recognition you already know that only i can help hashem hashem will fight for you and you will be still but what did hashem mean go go where i should go into the sea i should drown so here's the thing you see recognizing that we can't do it and that only hashem can help us is very important but there's still a missing component here that missing component is that we have to do it anyway cause i'll tell us an action jumped in and he went even though it made no sense well i'm going to drown the water was up to his nose he cried out oshie nearly kim ki bo hashem water has reached i'm going to drown and at that moment the sea split in other words on the one hand we need to know that we can't but then we have to believe that hashem can and do it anyways even if it feels like we're gonna die and that's why hashem said go now that you know only i can help you just need to go into the sea and it'll split now this takes a high level of emunah to completely let go of the self and jump into the sea you see it's one thing to know that we can't but to know that we can't and do it anyway that's mysterious nephesh and that's the lotion of naksha in action is a lotion the determination and the courage to go forward in spite of knowing that he can't having the faith to do it anyway going beyond your understanding and only then do we merit the true freedom from its rhyme so nakshan reached this level at the priyasiyamsu but it took the yiddin another 49 days to get to that level after the bear shall miriam and and all the nissan that they experienced where they were finally able to reach that level and say nasa then ishmael that's when they got the toro and they're able to do without understanding it says summed up the entire torah in one word sadiq will live in his faith the whole there is basically about doing without understanding and in the 12-step program also they talk about surrender letting go and you know it's hard to understand what that really means letting go what does it mean surrender i shouldn't fight so fighting means that if i just tried harder i think i i would be able to do it i believe that if i just tried harder i could do it but we often fail because it's really too strong for us but surrender means that i know i can't but i do it anyway because hashem can it's like jumping off a cliff because i know hashem is there to catch me this attitude is so powerful this attitude of surrender that it helps thousands of people break free from addictions but we can use this attitude for every struggle that we have for regular smear say naim as well you know sometimes we see something or we're pulled to look at something and it seems just too tempting too strong we can tell ourselves it is too strong i can't turn away but i'll do it anyway because hashem is there to catch me he takes care of my needs i can let go so even though i feel like i can't and you know like we ask ourselves do i have the strength to turn away from this it's too strong i don't think i can no discussion i admit i admit it's stronger than me but i don't care if i can or i can't because hashem could and he's with me hashem we change our kayak with hashem we get hashem's strength we no longer need to use our own strength but only if we jump off the cliff and trust him do we get hashem's strength and this is really the secret of beating daytar the etar is way stronger than us there's no way for us to beat him but hashem doesn't expect us to fight him enamel hashem is not looking for strength hashem just wants him he wants us to hope to him and he should save us from death the more we realize that the atari is death and we cry out to hashem to save us from death the more we're willing to do what feels like death and hoped hashem and that's when we merit true freedom from the eight sahara and from its time that's what nasa and ishmael means basically it means doing without understanding ready to jump even if our understanding says you're going to die we jump anyway you don't have a free man except who learns the torah was makable and himself the oil of torah true freedom comes from this ability to jump off without understanding my understanding says i'm going to die i'm jumping anyway because hashem is with me i know that that's what i need to do so what what's the takeaway from this whole drill show what can we learn from this whole process of utilizing so basically the first step is again that we we need to know that one way or another we got to serve hashem that's why they didn't have to go down to mitzrayim in the first place they would never have been willing to say nasa in ishmael if they didn't understand first the idea that they could either either be a slave to paoroi or a servant of akuresh baruch there's no two ways about it that's the way this world works and it was only because they had gone through mitzrayim that they realized how much sweeter it is to be a servant of akrishboku but the gayim who never went through mitzrayim they went never went through the quran barzel so they weren't willing to say nasa nishma why should they what's in it for me but they eden understood that there's either the slave to parametric or inevitable through the dark of the torah and you know now we're going through all the hard time with with corona and a lot of people going through very difficult times hashem doesn't want us to suffer but sometimes we have to go through certain things until we we are ready to be macabre and say who do we want to be servants of but that's only stage one in the second stage we have to realize that we really can't let go we thought we're gonna let go because it's in our best interest but we can't because hashem wants us to let go in a much deeper way not just because we feel like letting go because we realize it's good for me hashem wants us to let go on a higher level than that so he makes us realize that we really can't let go we have to be honest about that and cry out to hashem hashem i can't let go of my retireness i can't let go of my self-will of my desires they're too strong for me but then the last stage is we do it anyway we jump in and that's when the sea splits and we become truly free of mitzrayim and these attitudes take a lot of work and that's why i suggest everyone join the guard your eyes community thousands of years who are walking together in the desert after akuras baruch and sometimes we'll succeed in surrendering our desires sometimes pari will drag us backwards but together we'll get there in the end rabbi say so you can sign up to get the daily khizuk broadcast and your whatsapp or your email every day you'll get join our forums join our phone conferences and tools to learn how to break free of mitraim so may we be zaika this shaiva him to truly break free from the slavery of mitraim and to be zaifa to the coming of mashiach you