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Rabbi Shlomo Nisanov | A Father’s Testimony of Loss and Faith | CHAZAQ
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Transcript
Auto-generated transcript. Not time-synced to the video.
Thank you for the introduction.
Should
we shoot my pes
should my mother
my in-laws
my beautiful wife my children and all
the family members who are watching at
home who cannot come tonight.
I am forever grateful
for Israel. I've been saying to
everybody,
I am proud to be
a year a Jew
and I'm proud to be part of this greater
family.
for me to stand here
and to
say publicly to everyone,
thank you for your prayers.
Thank you for being there. Thank you for
being with us.
I think I spoke to my wife
the half an hour we were trying to save
my daughters was the only time I felt
alone.
Otherwise since then and the whole thing
how it happened I still we saw it with
our own eyes
we didn't understand
and
no one else was there to jump in so I
just jumped in the water why would any
other father do except that I don't know
how to swim
and to see
I really thought we're going to be
collecting body parts because you know
they went so fast slammed into a slab of
cement. I thought, you know, the head is
going to be one part, the body is going
to be another. And just to come over,
got closer, we didn't blow up those jet
skis. And to come and see my daughter
first I saw Aviva face down
and they kept saying, you know, we have
one, we have one. I didn't understand.
They're talking about my daughter Aviva.
I thought they were talking about
so with my wife and I, we pushed them
up. My wife is screaming at the top of
our lungs, please call 911.
And for some reason, the guy who's
supposed to be with us disappeared
left the scene of the crime.
So like we're trying to push her up
again
that they were working on the house. So
the workers helped us pull them out one
by one. And now all of a sudden I'm so
happy my daughter comes to she wakes up.
You know I don't wish this on anyone to
see your daughter's face down in the
water unconscious. I don't know what to
think. I just
and then all of a sudden after we got my
daughter out of I see my other daughter
under the under the dock all the way
like from here till the beimma
like I I got so panicked I ran I don't
know how I grabbed her. I don't know if
my wife helped me. We pulled her up and
I turned her over again
but she had a severe head trauma. Her
head was she hit severely against the
pole which is cement.
I have scratches all over I had
scratches all over my hand trying to
save them cuz I had to hold on one thing
to try to pull them out.
And when by the time the ambulance came,
they were doing CPR chest compressions
on my daughter, my baby.
and they took her in the ambulance and
I'm standing over there trying to figure
out what, where, when, and how
you know I have a red cap on. Thank God
I have it because I have a bald spot.
I learned the hard way. If you get a
sunburn, it hurts. Really hurts. So,
like I'm just saying, I'm just praying
and like walking back and forth. We
don't know what to do.
Our stuff is on the boat, our slippers,
nothing.
And once we came to the hospital,
from then on,
we did not feel alone.
Kabad Rabbi came from Rur County.
My wife's sister from another mother
Vicki she showed up
and
the rebbitson also her name also happens
to be Rael
and they come and give us the news that
I wish no parents ever have to hear that
we saved one of your daughters
but we couldn't save the second one
and Before
initial shock,
the first thing I said to myself is,
"What am I going to tell my mother?
What am I going to tell my in-laws?"
And I started apologizing to my wife. I
said, "I'm sorry. I couldn't save my
other daughter."
My grandmother used to always say,
"Things could always be worse.
shouldn't make it worse because no
matter how bad you think good things
could be even worse
and how fitting it is tonight
which is
I am to my loved one and my loved one is
to me
and I didn't know
how many times
my The youngest daughter
always was thinking about her bobo, her
grandfather, my father
David
[Music]
28 years ago. I was telling people when
I was sh of Shiva, I sat in my house 28
years ago when my father passed away. I
was 26 years old and my father was 54.
And I was sitting there and I was
telling everyone
and then my wife told me that she always
cried. She always say, "Mommy, I feel
Bobo. I feel my grandfather.
I want to see him.
I pray for Mashia should come."
And she would cry.
And you know, Hashem, we have seven
other ones. I never heard any of my kids
say that.
None of my other kids say that we know
we miss Bob Mo, we miss our grandfather
and it's not for nothing that
tonight,
tomorrow night is my father's side and
the is going to be exactly on September
11th, a day after my daughter's
birthday. She would have been 14 years
old.
But I am forever grateful and I said it
and people think I had something script
prepared. I said it
from the bottom of my heart.
I love you
and I'm happy if you could say that that
of all people that happened to me to my
wife cuz I think it will be somebody
else. He would have been knocked out. He
would have been asking questions of why.
But my father taught me many years ago.
We don't ask why.
The goim say why. We as hidden. We never
say why.
Why was my father the youngest passed
away 6 months after my grandmother? I
don't know. Why did my father lose his
oldest brother at 42 years old only two
months after he got married? I don't
know. Why did my cousins
were not even bar mitzvah? My oldest
cousin was 12 years old and my youngest
cousin was only 2 years old. 42 year old
man walked out of the house and they
brought him back in a in a you know my
grandparents were alive. My my father,
my two brothers, my aunts, they were all
alive.
We don't say why. Why is the worst
answer to us? We just continue living.
I have never seen such a as was
mentioned before. We are one big family.
Adam,
we are considered one.
Adam in singular and plural is one
because we are I never thought I would
see so many people.
2:00 in the morning, people are coming.
I left the hospital at 2:00 to go get my
passport to get ready to go to Heritage
Israel. Till 2:00 people were coming.
I didn't know that the state police
trump security of the hospital.
People just said, "Okay, we know why
you're here. Just keep going. Keep
going." 2:00 in the morning. I left the
hospital 2:00
till 3:00. I asked my wife what time
people were coming. 3:00 in the morning.
The next day I had to go to Miami to
pick up my passport. 7 o'clock in the
morning people are calling me ready.
I am proud to be
I am more than that. I need I need
Bkhari J. I am proud Bkharian. We are
BAS Bkharian America not BS.
And I saw it when we sat together when
everybody came when everybody was coming
to supposedly console. There is no
consolation.
There's nothing he could say.
But the most important thing is that
as my father would always say, John, you
have to continue living. You have to
continue. And that's why I carry my
daughter with me all the time cuz she's
alive.
She will always be with us. Someone
asked me, "So, how many kids now do you
have?" I said, "I always have eight
kids." I will always have eight kids.
She is my infinity. She's the eighth
child.
It's not
my
She will be always a living thing.
How fortunate it is for everybody.
Everybody came together as one. Rabbi
Paris Steinberg when he came to my house
he said Rabbi Niss this is not your
Shiva. This is Shiva. The whole Jewish
people are sitting Shiva with you. Don't
feel like it's only you. Only you going
through this. People came. I don't know.
I don't know. I thought maybe they're my
sons. Maybe some. No. People just showed
up and said you don't know me but we
heard you came. And we wanted to give
you Maka coming here
to give you offer of condolences during
the time of Shiva.
And how fitting it is tonight of all
times that we gather here in this
beautiful hall of young Israel of where
we have many here, many bar mitzvah,
everything. How fitting it is that I
have
who I've known for many many years. We
did our first Shabbaton almost 25 years
ago Hudson Valley Resort when it was
still alive and looking much better than
it looks now. And we had a beautiful
Shabbat
and the rabbit crone was been my wife's
teacher when she went to Sher and she
was she is continuing to be my daughter
Aviva Rafas
Manah over there and we're a big family
the breed of my grandson my oldest
grandson
also Abro did the breed of my nephew
nephew David Aaria
and what a small world together we're
coming and unfortunately I don't know if
Rabbi Chrome remembers unfortunately we
were together at a good convention I
came over with my wife to do to Rab and
to Rabbit and we said I'm sorry Rab we
won't be able to hear you Friday night
because we have to go back to Queens and
little do we know that what happened may
you
when to continue to inspire others and
on a great note I'm very happy to say
that my daughter with the filot of all
gods is from all over the world uncles
from Australia from Austria from Israel
all over the you guys all prayed for my
daughter and she's doing very very well
[Applause]
yes she's worried about her missing
teeth but the dentist said don't worry
about it we'll take care of your missing
teeth. It's unbelievable
flow. The miracles that have happened.
She's sitting in the front and she
didn't get hit on the head. She how you
know she had the right side broken arm
and and some couple of teeth, but she
didn't get hit on the head. It's
unbelievable.
Hashem, like I said in the beginning, I
thought I lost both my daughters, my two
girls after my six boys.
Hashem for Hashem's reason I we don't
know why we accepted the
we accept it because this is this is the
works of
there was a famous thing which we I will
conclude
to brought down
we know that we one of the questions
that everybody's asked is when is
mashiach coming
is The only on we say we don't say
we don't say
the only prayer if you look at the only
prayer we say all day three times a day
only for your South Asian.
Do we really want Mashiach?
So the famous question the asked the
question is if Mashiach did not come
during the time the Rambam's time rash's
time
the rash the
people who
they are the people who are let us
continue learning Torah why would
Mashiach come in our generation where we
are so far removed
that's a question that bothered me if
Mashiach didn't come so many times when
they were more Torah more
people who are doing my Z
my great greatgrandfather who's buried
in next to the
where it says on his
he was he died in 1911 and it says
came to visit my grandfather's
grandfather
when he was awake
all the time. If Mashiach did not come
during his time, why would he come
during our time? Why would he come
during the time of
who am I?
It's a good question.
And the gives a mushroom.
He says, imagine a giant big, huge, tall
guy. But no matter how tall he is, the
mountain is a little taller. It's about
2 feet tall. No matter how much he
tries, he cannot go over it because he's
two feet short. All of a sudden, he
takes someone who's a dro. He's a small
guy, two feet. He puts him on the
soldier on the soldiers and he says,
"Let's go now. Let's go over it." And
now they will be able to cross it.
That's the name. The fact that we had my
grandfather's grandfather, the fact that
we have the Raam, the Rashi and everyone
before, it's only telling us that
Mashiach is on his way. We are the
equant
because my daughter wanted Mashiach
because she really wanted to see her bo
she said I want to see my grandfather
and that's why she's buried in
next to my father. says,
"Aba,
papa,
I know you hear me. I know you're with
me. I always say to myself, what would
you do if you would be in my place?"
There are times I want to do something,
say something to people I don't like.
But I am reminded of you. He always told
me, John, don't argue with a foolish
person. We don't know who's the fool. If
you argue with him, then you might be
the fool also.
And my father used to tell me if someone
spit at your face just look up and say
wow where is it raining from guys spit
in my face.
If hashem didn't want that spit to hit
your face it would have never happened.
And if it happened
don't ask why
again with that like to introduce my
mentor my storyteller. Every year at
Tagura convention, I know why they let
him speak last Friday night. Friday
night, nobody's going to stay up till
11:00. But when Rab Sakron speaks Friday
night, everybody's going to stay up,
including myself, including my wife.
prison.