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I came to Adelfia at a time when my parents were going through a divorce. It was a very difficult time in my life. And my first introduction to Rabbi Tran was a hug. He looked at me, "Oh, yoy, yily, gold hug." And I never stopped feeling that hug. Rebby had no problem standing up and screaming and yelling about the greatness of a boy, of a talmid, or even a random individual he had just met. I was speaking in a school in Muny and a woman came over to me. You don't know me. She said, "But I used to live near you in Lakewood. I had a child that was totally deformed, not regular. Nothing was right about her. I never wanted anyone to see her." Well, one Travis, she was walking with the stroller and all of a sudden she looks up. My husband is standing there. So, she says, "Oh, hello, Rabbi Tran." He says, "Do you mind if I kiss your daughter?" He bent down. He kissed him. He's like, "Such a beautiful daughter." And I was thinking, if I was that person who was passing her, I think I would have crossed the street only to show her that I don't want to embarrass her. My husband had no inhibitions, had no feeling of like something that he's doing is wrong. >> And the reason was because it wasn't about him. And that's why he was able to stand up on a chair at a Torah convention or dance on tables at braitzvas at kasinus because it was about the message. It was about the audience, what they needed to hear, and he was able to negate himself completely, even at the expense of looking and sounding like someone who's pushing the social norms. >> He never held back from telling someone how great they were and how much he loved them. Let's say Rab Matio spoke. My husband would call him afterwards. Rab Matio, I loved that speech. Ra Matio told him, you know, even an adult loves compliments. Ary Maliel when he came to Lakewood the first speech that he made my husband went to he called rabbits and racial cutler afterwards to tell her what an impression he made on mero the first book that he wrote my husband loved it and called him up my husband couldn't reach him so he called his mother and told her how impressed he is with your stories I thought to myself when I was maspedi rebby would jump out of the urin run over to me hug me pick me up and tell ME Y BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL that's what he did his entire life to If someone does something wrong, you want to tell them, especially if you're the mother, the teacher. You feel like that's your mission. I have to tell them what they're doing wrong and what they should do right. My husband never did that. Never did that. >> In Yeshiva, you were not allowed to smoke. And yet, everybody smoked. And rarely was anybody caught. The reason was because Rabbi Tran when he came to the dorm, he sent messages in the form of his own voice. TRAN IS COMING. TRAN IS COMING to let everybody know he's coming. Put out the cigarettes. Put away whatever is not supposed to be out. >> He doesn't want to criticize. He doesn't want to talk to down to them. So he didn't do it. >> Rebby made a choice to focus and zoom in on that do on that nuda that point of good. Amplify it talk about it and celebrate it until you celebrated yourself. >> Boys who came to my husband's class, they were already feeling like garbage. Everybody didn't want to have them. Nobody saw the good in them. When my husband would tell them how good they are, they denied it. Like, no, Ravi, I didn't even mean what you think I meant cuz I'm really stupid. But he proved to them otherwise it's not true. You are smart. And everyone says about him, he made me believe that I was something that I didn't know that I was. Like he knew it before I knew it. Rebi was so consistent and persistent about us being great that with time it started impacting us. It started penetrating and we started believing it. When I came to yeshiva 9th grade I had a hard time coming to shakus. Rebi would come wake up to Bakrum every morning 20 minutes half hour before Shakras come back 10 minutes before Shakras and then he would come back during Shakus itself and he would be in his talis in fill in and he would be yelling we would hear his voice still from down the hall and we would be in bed. So everybody everybody at once would jump out of bed and run into their closets and hide. So when Revi opened the door, nobody was in bed, but we weren't in the mismedr either. And Rebi was no fool. He knew everybody was in the closet, but he never ever opened the closet door. He never looked to catch anybody. And this would go on for weeks, for months. And then I remember one time I came to Shakus. It was like close to Alenu, close to the end. And I walked in. A Rebi would sit in the back of the ba medish. And he saw me walk through the door and he jumped up. He was so excited to see me. He celebrated my coming late that one time as if I showed up to Vika. When we had the yeshiva here, my husband was the bus driver. He picked up everyone every morning, brought them to yeshiva to Darin. And it was a very difficult job because everyone was still sleeping when he came to the house. They're not waiting for the bus. There was one boy that he went to every single day for 2 years. He never came back with my husband. never came to doubt him. But my husband never stopped. Every day he went to get him. And even after he came, he just would put his head down on the desk and just go to sleep. He never doubted. My husband never said a word to Beth Avenue. But one day he came over to my husband and this he's telling us the story. He told my husband that Roby and I forgot to say and Esray. I guess by then he was a little bit. Do I have to repeat? He asked my husband and my husband didn't answer him. Guess my husband had a hard time answering that question because he knew this boy doesn't like the davin. So finally my husband said to him, you know, if you're asking me the hala, if you have to say over again, the haka is that if someone forgets on rodesh by chakras, yes, he does have to repeat. But I have to tell you something, your question is better than the answer because nobody asks that question. And he said since that time he never didn't dab in chakras and he never forgot to say yala. I remember one man came with eight daughters and his wife. They're standing by the table. My husband says to him, "Bring me Reb Misha's book. Read me the first Shila in that book that they asked Reisha, do you remember when you asked me that same question when you were in ninth grade?" I'm looking at this man. This man doesn't remember. Don't embarrass him in front of all eight girls and how would he remember? But my husband remembers. And then he said to him, "And what did I tell you?" And my husband told him, "Whatever question you were able to ask, that's how we defined you. You are the guy who asked that kasha." >> Every kasher that amen asks is the MOST IMPORTANT KASH IN THE WORLD. WHY? Cuz he's asking it and he wants to know the answer. >> Rebby had the remarkable ability to love a Talmud even when the talmid targeted him or was angry with him. Rebi doubled down on that love. There's one guy in yeshiva who had an anger issue. Rebi talked about this Talmud as if he was the god Alhadar. He would come home, tell his wife and children, I have this Talmud who is the greatest of the great. He is smart. He's bright. He's learning. >> Once in my house while we were eating lunch, I don't know what bothered him, but there was hot food on the table. Lasagna, soup that I made. He took the table. He put his hands under the table and threw it at the boys on the other side of the table. And like my first thought was, I'm never going to get this kitchen clean again. It was all over the place. I said to Adam, "This boy Cayen, who you love, that's the one who's flipped over the table. I I wouldn't even want to have him here." He says, "What do you mean? He has a problem. I agree, but I love him." He always told his tummy he is the luckiest rebby because he has the best voice. It >> wasn't the technique to get you to believe how great you are. He genuinely genuinely genuinely believed that he really felt this way about you. >> He was always telling us our whole family such a so special. Oh, he's so special. He's so in love with him. He's so excited that he came to his class. My children thought that Adelfi Yeshiva had the best tummy. My daughter once heard in camp a girl said, "Oh, you're in Del. Oh, that's DC for that." You know, the boys who can't get into DC was she's like, "What?" Like, "No way. It's the best boys." One day during Shiva, we'll tell them from many years, different ages. They were competing with each other of who Rebby loved the most. And everybody said he was the most beloved student. I was the most. And everyone had a story to prove it. I was so impressed. and enamored with him. I could not believe the things that he did. One of the things that impressed me the most during the 6 months that he wasn't well was when any tommet came to see him any it could be from 50 years ago be from 17 years ago he always remembered what he had learned with him. >> Whatever ma you were learning he had one gumaro that he would review with his tidam every single day until they memorized it by heart. >> Everybody had a garra. You had your gar. And every time I called Rebi even 20 years later remember I still remember the thing by heart. I can say the whole because every day the entire ninth grade he drilled it into us planting that point of connection between us and him and he would always come back to it. One day the Rebbitson was sitting in her office and she hears yelling outside her window. She goes to the window and she sees this Talmud is yelling, assaulting Rabbi Tran. >> He didn't like something that my husband did a night and as he screamed at my husband, he punched my husband in the I'm watching and I'm thinking I'm calling the police. It's crazy. This guy is a maniac. But my husband didn't do anything. This young man, he punched my husband six times in the drawer. My husband's drawer was like misaligned. He had to go to the doctor to have it straightened out. He couldn't talk. >> Fast forward, Rebby is sick in his final days and this talmet shows up. >> The first words he said to my husband, "Rebi, I have to ask you ma." My husband not well. He said, "Absolutely not. You have nothing to ask me for. Please do not ask me maka." At this point, I thought he's going to have another attack because he wanted to do something. My husband's going to stop him. But my husband said to him, "Kayam, do you remember the last thing that we learned when you were here in the yeshiva? We never finished it. Let's finish learning now." I could cry. I could cry even right now because this boy, you know, to me there's something wrong with him and he hurt you and why don't you let him ask you ma? My husband learned with him. He left and he left. I said to my husband, why didn't you let him ask you ma? Because he kept on saying, "But Rebei, I have to ask you ma." That's what my husband said to me. Leia, if a boy had a bad complexion and it's oozing and you're echoed from it, does he have to ask you, Michaela, I feel like I'm so lower than my husband because I didn't even know what my husband was talking about. Why? What? What does one thing have to do with the other? He said this boy had a problem. We knew he had a problem. He can't manage anger. He has to ask me. >> Rebby realized that his anger is only skin deep. Behind every obnoxious act, there's a cry for help. It wasn't personal. Ah, he punched me. He hurt me.