Rabbi Leeor Dahan Chazaq Shiva Asar B'Tammuz program 5778

thank you to the new mayor of into the whole Kasich organization and also to tarney time comm they're all doing wonderful things for preparing this event and for all the many events that they do and inspiring many hundreds of people possession you guys can continue with the success that you have in Gromack identified to spread throughout the whole America the whole world I'm in them in few questions I'd like to ask about you warszawo Thomas maybe to get a little bit further in to hash out the details of what the what the seller what the morning is about and we know the Gemara tells us that there are a few things that transpired during the time of Shiva sub-item was the first one that maja mentions is initiative guardo quote which means that report were broken through moshe rabbeinu because of the worshipping of the golden calf and the mother asked a question he says i don't really understand why are we mourning the breaking of the record isn't it more fundamental shouldn't we be more concerned about the fact that we worshipped what does that idolatry that's really where the problem was located if you look at the core of the issue there's a dispute exactly when the worship of the incas avada have happened but it was either on the 16th or the 17th of Tammuz but it would seem to be that that would be more apropos to mourn the tragedy of ami said doing the most catastrophic sin that took place in the nation in the history of a messiah that's number one number two why is it that the morning and the the breaking of the new hot was so tragic it the fact of the matter is it's true that the new coats were broken but you can replace them as they were indeed replaced there was the second coat so in the long run we didn't really lose out from the new coat so what exactly is the reason to mourn something that wasn't really the final step it wasn't really the the last of the new hot that's number one number two when we talk about the fact that the code not stopped in Potomac - Butera to meet the Gemara says that the Cabana of the tamid which is a Caban that lasted every single day consistently Itaquera circuit I leave a book Leviticus - Anita seven album we had the Morning Calm and afternoon : it was brought every single day why is it that we stress the cabana Tamid you know first of all let's say fine we lost out on the Tamiya the consistency of the sacrifice okay we still have better Mik - there's still other Koba note we're not focusing on them we're not focusing on any of the other worshipping as we do in bed Tomac - why is there this focal point same question could be asked on the 3rd where we talk about the breaching of the walls of you who said I'm okay on its own right on its face that's not really where the tragedy lies the tragedy lies in over running the city taking over bitonic - destroying bitumen gosh why is the breaching of the walls made an emphasis is the one that we declared to be so tragic that's what we have to mourn for and in truth it's a fundamental line that runs through all these questions and we have to try understand a certain sense events could be catastrophic but not inherently due to the event itself rather the event revealed a certain relationship that we have developed with a kadosh baku and what we would call the turning of the tide the tide has now turned and Amy said benefitted and they gleaned from a very strong bond with a kadosh Baku we were in with a Kadosh Baruch to meet I am about to receive the Torah Michelle Ben who goes up to have seen ie and a Mesa in and does a terrible sin the fact that you did a terrible sin in its own right doesn't mean you lose that relationship you could still fix you could still create a bond when we'll shut up in who put the final nail in the coffin and he said no this relationship is going to be severed it's not going to be the same the new heart are gonna have to be broken we cannot merit such a heart that would be a in the equivalent of saying that the husband gives the wife the ring he says I don't want you to have that ring I'm taking that ring back and I'm gonna throw it away and that ring you're not worthy of it and that was a sign it was a telltale to the relationship that was never gonna be the same that I'm he said maybe we will have a second set of reports but that second set does not have the same love relationship bond with a Kadosh bahu and that kind of set the tone to what the relationship is going to be and that's really where the morning lies the morning lies not on the event itself but rather the fact that it proved and revealed that we don't have that bond in connection with a Kadosh bahu narcos bro who punishes it's not about the punishment it's that revelation that Akkad about who's not happy with us that's where the morning lies same thing could be said about the Tamiya the Cabana Tamid was a sacrifice that was brought every single day it showed consistency it showed a relationship and that was lost it was a tone we don't have that same type of worship that connection with a Kadosh bahu the breaching of the walls of you who said I'm the same thing can be said when those walls were breached it showed that we weren't impervious that a collage buffer wasn't protecting us the tide has officially turned and it has become negative and to our detriment and not to our benefit and that is the first signs of the final Galu to the final Exodus was right there that's when a Mossad realized that this is not going well for us and we are not really strong in our relationship with a Kurdish boku sometimes we have a very difficult time relating to the morning and why we have to go and be not listening to music during the three weeks why do we have to go ahead and not be allowed to take a shower during the show wash a car bowl or the nine days why is it that we're doing all these elements of mourning and I heard a beautiful parable in the name of love you'd love it he says imagine to yourself he had a couple was married for 20 years and as much as they tried as much as that he prayed as much as they did they weren't able to have children eventually Hakadosh baku in his great mercy gave them she became pregnant the wife became pregnant and they went through the pregnancy and first trimester second trimester third trimester everything's going by okay I'm pretty well by the time they are realized they're about to go into labor she the woman enters into labor and the husband's waiting outside in the room in outside the room and he's reading his Tehillim and he's praying to others but who that everything should go successfully but as the time passes on the husband notices that doctors keep coming in and keep leaving and they consulted each other outside the room equipment is being brought in he knows this is not standard procedure and he realizes that there's something going on over here the doctor comes over to him and he says look the situation is absolutely grave your wife is in critical condition we have two options in front of us they're both very serious and very sad the first of which you have the possibility we think we could save the mother but it would be at the expense of the child and on the other hand we could save the child but we can't save both we can't save the mother and the child you're gonna have to make a decision who do you want us to save the father shocked he doesn't know what to think he says I have to talk to love how am I going to decide this this is literally life and death situation there's no time for a live you have to make a decision it's moments we're talking about we lose these moments and when we could lose both of them says let me at least talk to my wife it's her life she has to be the one to decide what she wants to do and he explains to her the situation she says to her husband without hesitation what purpose do I have to living if I'm gonna live without live without a child I'm not interested in that type of a life I want the child to survive and I'm willing to lose my life for the sake of the child but tell the son tell that child that I want him to remember me don't forget the commitment that I gave to you please relay that message sure enough the husband leaves the room and the doctors did what they had to do and the doctors were right the mother passed away and a baby beautiful baby healthy baby boy was born to him you could imagine the next day during the funeral how tragic and how sad it was people that are by name that were speaking that were eulogizing they were crying everybody in the audience was crying it was so sad and emotional for everybody that was there time goes by the little toddler becomes a Bar Mitzvah boy and the night of his Bar Mitzvah the father turns to him and he says my dear son you know that tonight is not just your bummy so it's also the yard side of your mother your mother passed away the same day you were born please you are a few you have an obligation to go up to be the Hassan to lead the congregation make sure the yurts Fila your prayer is heartfelt that it's from the depth of your heart go slowly don't go quickly and the Sun goes up and he's standing up there and he's about to start Cuddy she's about to start the Shema and you're gonna have to get remember he starts running through the two feet ah she might say it he finishes it in a minute she won't I say I didn't want to show back six minutes haven't even passed and he's done with entire treati the father sees this and he faints he doesn't know what to do with himself he just collapses he can't believe what just took place as he wakes up he goes running to the sign people wake him up he looks at the sign says how can you do this to your mother where's your heart where's your emotions where's your where's your feelings the son looks at enemy says feelings emotions what do I know about my mother I've never seen my mother my mother to me is just a stone in the graveyard that's all she is a bowtie sometimes we act in that way ha kadosh beaucoup he had two options he could destroy the Potomac - he could allow the wrath and the sins to affect stones and sticks or he could take us he could take his children the two most dear things taça - beaucoup Anika - whoa who said I'm willing to sacrifice my glory my presence in this world for the sake of saving army soil the Potomac - was the vehicle that saved us and we look and we say well like a - beaucoup why shouldn't we let be allowed to listen to music is there anything we could do could we listen to this type of music maybe we could maybe we could find a loophole on this matter so we want to eat meat so let's find the way we could do it we start finding these loopholes how could you not have that emotion how could we not go ahead and implement in ourselves and realize to ourselves that what hakadosh baruj for us with the bitumen - meant for us is exactly what we have what we're standing here today sometimes what happens is that you know today we live in such an intellectual society there is a lot of wisdom a lot of education were very educated people and it's difficult you say someone who's so intellectually supposed to cry for the destruction of the bit Cermak - but let me tell you the live in ER lobelia uno PA and mentions the story that happened 3,000 years ago when the Potomac - was destroyed there was a philosopher you might all be familiar with him his name was Plato and Plato was invited by Nebuchadnezzar akasha to visit the ruins of Potomac - he came and he met none other than Yemaya Hanavi you imagine such a confrontation Yomi anivia on the one hand and Plato on the other hand and Plato witnesses that you owe me an AVI he is lamenting and crying and in bitter tears over the destruction of bateau media me an avi for those who went through you me I could see that there was no consoling over the destruction of bitumen - it was the most tragic event that he felt and he endured through the course of his life and Plato sees this and he's puzzled he looks at Yummie and he asks him you're the wise you're the Hakan of a messiah of this holy nation how could you go ahead and bring yourself and cry for this destruction of sticks and stones it's unbefitting of your wisdom plus additionally it's not the ways of an intelligent person to cry over events that happen in the past we say the expression spilt milk you don't cry over things that happen to pass because there's no way of repairing or fixing the past why are you crying over what happened in me Anna V does not directly respond to him but he says to him listen you're a philosopher I'm sure as a philosopher probably have a good number of quandary you haven't really resolved yet so Plato looks at him and says indeed I do I have a number of them that I don't think truthfully any person in the world will be able to resolve you me access to him why don't you tell me your sofa caught your doubts and I will resolve them for you and Plato begins to express all of his philosophical debates and ideas and where he has no more avenues to solve and what the problems are Yemaya off-the-cuff response to each and every single one of his quandary and solves them to the content of Plato himself Plato is witnessing this and he is in shock this man has never heard the question in his life and he already has beautiful and well thought-out approaches and ideas to answer and to explain every single one of the points he's looking at him and he says I can't believe you're an actual human being you you can't be it's not possible that you're a mere mortal and yummy and avi says all the wisdom that I have just portrayed in front of you that all came from the sticks and the stones of the Potomac - and I shouldn't mourn over it as far as your second question is concerned how could such a wise man cry and be sad about the past that I'm afraid I won't be able to explain to you because you won't be able to understand that's a powerful story I don't think if the levity I wouldn't have said this I don't know how we could have known this but you have to think about those words you'll me anivia saying well there is something to cry about even if it's in the past how do you explain that he says that Plato wasn't able to understand but we have to venture and try to do our best to understand what Ilyana he was crying about because it's incumbent upon us to cry those same tears that you me added it's possible to explain based on something that might seem unrelated kind in heaven oh the story of kind in heaven we learn when we are young kids and maybe pre 1a maybe 1st grade and the sad part is sometimes we don't revisit the story and we kind of take it on its superficial level and just assume that those facts but they can't be true I mean the basic story kind brings an offering and his offering is from the flax the land the cheap part of his portion and heavy ed brings from the best of the sheep which is his portion he brings from the best of it so our colors but who doesn't listen doesn't heed the koba and the sacrifice of kind and he accepts the sacrifice of heaven except you see so that's the story on its face and kind gets upset and he kills heaven but you got to think deeper into the story because the commentaries point out to us that first of all who convinced heaven to bring a koban the clea cow rights it was kind kind was the one that convinced heaven to bring the co by now I don't understand kind at all you have half the world to yourself every single tree every single land belongs to you you are the owner of all the real estate in the world why are you bringing a kodoku the cheapest stuff that you got doesn't make any sense you got to think about that heaven was not kind was no fool but the truth of the matter in kind was actually very very deep in his understanding of the way it works in shammai many understood something that we might fail to realize sometimes taka - Bravo makes no difference if I bring the best or the worst now one thing is for sure ha kadosh Bravo gave me a gift he gave me all the land of the world he gave me of the best of the worst and of the middle he gave me everything if I if I am to sacrifice that cuddlers but who the best in a certain sense what I'm doing is I am denying the good and I am not showing recognition for that which I Callisto who gave me because why should I give our cutters Buckelew the best in return it doesn't make any difference that cutters bohu whether you give him of the best or of the worst and as far as I'm concerned this is a gift from our Kadosh beaucoup so I shouldn't be negligent in the gift and give him from my best when I could give him just the same from the worst and it will be the same in the eyes of ekadasa-bhava so it would be negligent in my accepting of the present and the godly gift that God gave me that's a pretty interesting philosophy I mean at least he's coming from a very strong perspective as a matter of fact there is this seems to be approved to him from the garage as well we won't get into Sigma inch of wood that seems to back him up on that point what was his mistake remotion feinstein explains the error wasn't intellectual he was a hundred percent right everything he was saying on the intellectual level was correct there is no difference what you bring tackle is boho because Tycho Brahe who doesn't make a difference but that's if you work only on an intellectual level the part that kind failed to realize is that as a human being we don't just work on intellectual levels we have emotions and we have to be in touch and worship God with our emotions not just with in with in our and intellect and the mistake and the flaw that he had is he thought of it purely in terms of the mindset but in truth you have to have a relationship with us bahu what is your heart gonna believe if you bring from the worst your hearts not gonna feel a connection with like others boho you're not gonna feel it maybe intellectually you're right but emotionally it's not going to lead to a relationship and that might be part of the point that you me I was saying that you're right intellectually why cry over spilt milk but if you want to have a relationship with a kadosh boku the heart has to be vibrant you have to feel that emotion because what kind of a relationship we don't just have an intellectual relationship we have an emotional bond with our Kadosh bahu and we have to respect and honor that bond finish off I heard later saw in the show she edit are they shown of bisque one of the same it says about Reb Yosef Dov soloveitchik he was a co-wash shiva of the shiva vulajin and later on moved to the city of where he became the chief rabbi and as he was approaching an elderly age he decided that it's time for him to retire enough it's been a long time and he's worked really hard and he wants to have time devoted to his own personal learning so he wanted to step down from his position in and just as a private citizen to learn and to be you know maybe teach here and there but not to take such a heavy burden at such an elderly age when in brisk which was a powerhouse of Tola a strong vibrant Jewish community heard that abusive dose of a chick was stepping down from his position of they immediately pounced on the situation so this is our opportunity to bring such a great man to our city and they sent a delegation of their most important prestigious people they went out to to try to coerce to convince the love to come down to come to the to the brisk now that I've refused to hear it he did not want under any circumstance to go he was already older it was tough for him he didn't want to take the position and he refused they offered him a nice amount of money very respectable they offered him the honor of being in the most in the most great cities of teloth the strongholds of Toa that existed at that and he rejected it so okay what are you gonna do already they started conversing with him and Deva Toa just learning and different things they got off the topic they talked about other things and they got engaged in a conversation of the Toa and it was very lively and lovely they had a good enjoy enjoyable conversation they saw that the brisk revs attitude the abusive selvedge attitude was you know a much better spirit than he was before and one of the individuals of the delegation took that opportunity and he said okay right now I'm gonna go ahead and make a final attempt to try to bring him to the issue he says there are 20,000 Jews in brisk that are waiting to hear your voice they're waiting to hear your Toa are you gonna reject the calls of thousands and thousands of Jews that want to hear what you have to say and those words the way they were expressed with the emotions penetrated into the heart of repulsive dose of a cheek he thought about it and he couldn't reject it he couldn't say no he couldn't bring himself to say no to the call of thousands and thousands of Jews and he accepted the position that's a greatness of the brisker of that he can go ahead and it's not the money it's not the honor it's that there's Jews willing to hear what he has to say I can't say no to them this story the story came to the ears of the prophets cahiim one of its fame heard the story he began to cry he said if the great DA told our mind with the great knowledge their abusive dose of a cheek had in the Torah and in his understanding of the ways of a Kadosh bahu he heard the call of 20,000 Jews and he couldn't say no to them there are Jews that are seeking me I can't say no says the Hoffa tell him how much more so if I'm aside were to get up and they were to turn to Kadosh bahu and demand the coming of Messiah if we want to hear the voice of our Messiah of our Messiah know how much more so carrados bahu not turn them down and with those words the heifetz hain began to cry those words are the powerful words that we have to make sure that we live by that we understand we live in an affluent society we live in a very enjoyable period of time historically speaking it's very difficult sometimes to want and desire and to seek the coming of Messiah but it's upon us to make sure that we do that job properly and that we call out our cutters local and say we want we seek and we desire to hear that beautiful voice of the coming of Messiah Madhavi I mean oh c'mon I mean