What you give attention to will grow.

If you want your relationship with your spouse to grow, you got to give him or her attention. If you want the tension in your relationship to grow, you got to give him or her attention. Attention could either enhance your marriage or it could create more distance in your marriage, and it depends on what version of your spouse you're giving attention to, what version of yourself you're giving attention to, what version of your relationship you're giving attention to.