Stop Fixing Behavior. Start Fixing This Instead.

Okay guys, parasim. It's actually a double para. It's paras and parasim. But the lesson or message we're focusing on today is in parasim. The para of kadoshim contains I don't have the exact number but it contains probably 80 mitzvah or something. Um a lot. The 613 mitzvah are scattered throughout the Torah. Some paras don't discuss any mitzvah. Some discuss one or two. Some discuss multiple. This [snorts] one discusses a good amount and a lot of fundamental mitzvah. For example, the mitzvah of love your fellow, the mitzvah to not hate your fellow. But then there's some lesser well-known mitzvah in this parha. One of the mitzvah that we have in this para is to not pervert justice, to be honest in business, integrity. But it's more than just integrity. It's a little bit more specific and a it's a little bit more nuance. And when you read the actual sentence, which I'll do in a second, it may seem a little archaic, although there is significance even in the present and certainly spiritual significance even in the present. The Torah says, "Don't pervert justice with measurements, with weights." And it goes on to list different units of of measuring, whether units to measure distance, units of measuring weight, units of measuring volume. When you're doing trade, don't cheat people. Don't um don't [snorts] rig your scales. So, uh, to your advantage or to anybody's advantage, it's prohibited. It's stealing. The next sentence then says that not only can you not rig because it's stealing, if you have rigged scales or any unit of measurement, um, scales for weight, but you might have some sort of tool to measure volume or tool to measure distance. And if you even own a rigged measuring tool, that itself is a prohibition. Then it says, "I am the Lord your God who take who took you out of Egypt." Okay, seemingly it's it's pretty simple. Don't steal, don't cheat. It's a little bit more nuanced, guys, than just don't steal and don't cheat. Because as we know the real estate in uh the syntax real estate in the Torah is very expensive. The Torah is not going to tell us something that we don't need to know or something that we know already. We already know you can't steal. We already know that there's a prohibition of cheating and that you have to be honest in business. What is the exact nuance over here? So the Talmud emphasizes that the prohibition over here is not the stealing or the cheating. We know you can't steal or you can't cheat. Who cares if it's if it's robbery or or battery or with faulty measuring tools, you know, something a little bit more sophisticated or cyber attacks or whatever it is. What's the difference? You can't cheat. Why get into the details of how you can't cheat? It's not relevant. Don't do it. So, the Talmud says that the prohibition is not just on the act of cheating, it's on the ownership of these tools or the creation of these tools. Both. Were you to create some sort of measuring scale that was rigged or some sort of measuring tool that was rigged that you could potentially use to your advantage? That itself is the prohibition. If you use it, okay, you also violated stealing. If you don't use it, you are still violating a Torah law. You see the nuance here? Now, why is that so significant? The reason why it's significant is because what's being prohibited here is not a behavior, an identity. Usually the Torah is telling us what to do or what not to do, at least overtly. Over here, it seems to be very clear that the Torah is not just telling us not to steal or not to cheat or not to be dishonest, but don't own tools that put you in a position of dishonesty. Don't be that kind of guy. Don't be that person. Don't be that dude. The Torah is preventing or forewarning identity, not just behavior. Um there's there's something [snorts] quite unique about this mitzvah. So generally like if you contrast this to stealing when it comes to any mitzvah or prohibition there's usually a minimal amount. So this is true with anything right? If you eat matzah on pes in order to eat mat you have to have a certain amount right you have to have there's a minimum amount you need a kazayas an olive size whatever that means different different ways of measuring that. Um when it comes to cooking on chabas I'm giving an example right one may not cook on chabas there is a there is a definition of cooking like if is your steak rare is it medium rare right there there there is there's temperatures everything has measurements in the Torah when one steals they are obligated to return what they had stolen but only if they stole a significant amount amount. There's a there's a minimum amount. There's a measurement. You know what that minimum amount is? A pr which somewhere between like 5 to 10 cents. But if you were to have if you stole less than five to 10 cents, it's still not allowed, but you can't nobody could take legal action against you. Um, I remember once a rabbi living a class and a I mean he's like a hakic authority in Israel and a question came to his court where somebody stole um a lot of fruit from a fruit stand but in increments of less than a pa. So, we'd walk by the stand, steal a strawberry, walk by again, and at the end of the year, it's 365 strawberries or or whatever it is, and that's a lot. And there was a whole ethical question or question. Does he need to return the money or not? Over the course of a year, he had stole a significant amount, but every time he stole, it was be it was below the threshold. I I think he ended up having to pay that. You consider you add it all up together, right? But bottom line is there are minimum amounts to what is considered sealing, what isn't considered ceiling. However, when it comes to measuring tools, how many measuring tools can't you own or does it matter to what degree you are measuring? It doesn't make a difference. There is no threshold because even if they're not usable, they're too small. They're not functional. They're not usable. Even if you're just holding on to them, even if you're using them for chamber pots, that's what some opinions say, doesn't matter. You can't have them because the prohibition over here is not just don't act with dishonesty. It's don't be dishonest. It's not just about behavior. It's about identity. Which answers a very important question that commentaries ask. Why in the sentence where it says not to maintain these tools for dishonest business, for dishonest measuring um trying to think of what the equivalent would be these days. I don't know, some sort of app that can help you hack things, you know? I don't know, [laughter] whatever it is, right? There there's there's some sort of modern day equivalent. You can't even own it, right? Don't even download the app. [snorts] In the same sentence, the Torah says, "I'm the Lord your God who had taken you out of Egypt." And the commentaries wonder what the connection is. Rashi says, "This is why I took you out of Egypt. That's why you took us out of Egypt. You took us out of Egypt. We were suffering, man. We were suffering physically with the oppression. We were suffering spiritually." Um, if you look in the Hagada, it says, you know, we we recount the story and it saysanu, which we often translate as the Egyptians did bad to us. commentaries say if you translate it literally, it actually says they did bad with us because we were hanging out with the wrong people. Like we were talking about earlier and we had um we were hanging out with the wrong people and their mentality rubbed off us rubbed off on us. God finally took us out of Egypt and he says, "I'm taking you out of Egypt so you don't have faulty measurement tools that are used to cheat people." Like what? Why is Rashi saying that? The answer is because not having these tools as an identity. Not using the tools as a behavior, but we're saying not just to not use them. We're saying to not even own them because we have an identity of honesty, an identity of faith. The commentaries point out that what we saw from the Exodus of Egypt, what we witnessed, and the reason why it's so fundamental to our faith, we talk about it every Shabas and and every day we mention it. We have a holiday centered around it. It's the epitome of faith, of God's presence in our life. We find ourselves in a difficult point in an Egypt and we know that God could take us out and sometimes we find ourselves in a financially difficult situation and it could be tempting to do unethical uh business decisions. But we have to remember that this is why God took us out of Egypt to remind ourselves even in difficult circumstances. God is still relevant. God still matters. We don't need to even own those tools, let alone use them because that's just not who we are. There's a fascinating commentary known as Rabenu Bakaya. He's one of the spheric sages. And I'll I'll tell you why I find him to be fascinating is because every most commentaries have a certain style, a certain lit, not just a literary style, but a certain purpose that they're that they're serving. For example, as we know Rashi, his job is to give us the simple meaning of the text and the simple meaning of the text as he interprets it based on Tammudic and Midashic literature. So, Rashi sifts through s thousands of pages of the Talmud, thousands of passages of midrash that discuss the portion, the Torah, the para, and Rashi [snorts] will pick out the explanations from the midrash that he believes are the literal interpretations, right? You'll have other commentaries such as the benezra, the barbanell that will give literal interpretations but more on personal interpretation rather than um rather than pulling from or calling from sources. You'll have the Ramban who focuses on Cabala. You'll have um trying to think of other examples but whatever you know every every commentary has their speed, has their style, has their their purpose. You'll have the clear who focuses on homalytic interpretation goes through everything. He'll say here's the literal interpretation. Here's the midashic interpretation. Here's the cabalistic interpretation. Here's the ethical interpretation. And he goes through layers on every portion of his commentary. So it's very interesting to read. And over here he discusses the ethical significance, the ethical message of not owning faulty weights. And he says the truth is this is already addressed in the book of proverbs by King Salman. Mish. The truth is Mish is Mish Proverbs is kind of a hard book to read because it's looks like a bunch of it could look like a bunch of bumper stickers. There's no like storyline, you know? It's it it's but it's King Salman's ethical wisdom. And here's he quotes King Salman. Here's what he says. I quote for you guys in the name of King Salman himself who says my heart has been purified who says I've been purified from my sins I have multiple stones measuring stones multiple measuring units and both of them are are an abomination to Hashem. So says, "Well, what's King Salman saying? [snorts] Why is he comparing my heart being unclean to owning faulty weights and faulty stones?" Because the fact that one owns them, whether he uses them or not, is not a behavioral issue. It's a personality issue. And that personality issue needs to be addressed. And the way we start addressing it is not even putting ourselves in that situation. Avoiding the situation altogether. Many ethical deficiencies in life can be avoided not through just doing things differently but positioning positioning ourselves. That is the key to success. Proper positioning the proper stance. [snorts] So when the Torah says, "Don't own these faulty tools. I am the Lord your God who had taken you out of Egypt. Rashi says this is the reason I taken you out of Egypt. Well, what does that mean? I took you out of Egypt so you guys can position yourselves ethically, not just act ethically. In the Torah, it speaks about the prohibition of owning um these measuring tools that are meant for cheating. Speaks about it in other portions as well. And in the Torah, it's actually just juxtaposed to the story of Amalik. They're like in the same in the same para in the same paragraph. So the major says that that suggests that there's a connection. What is the connection between the nation of Amalik to owning these stones? The nation of Amalik um is a nation that we are obligated to annihilate. They're a nation that wanted us to be annihilated. They [snorts] tried killing us. They preempted their attack. And it was a baseless hatred. It wasn't it, you know, there's certain people historically that would attack Jews because of fear. When the Midionites attacked the Jews, they were afraid. We still have an obligation to defend ourselves. That's fine. But but the context is a little bit different. When the Canaanites tried attacking the Jews and Joshua led war, we were conquering the land of Israel as we were supposed to. They were afraid as were we. So there's a war when it comes to the Amalachites. When it comes to the Amalik, we left Egypt. We're on our way innocently to receive the Torah at Mount Si and Amalik comes and attacks us. But for what reason? It wasn't anti-semit anti-semitism guised as fear. It was just anti-semitism. It was just hatred. So we have an obligation to annihilate them, to get rid of them. Whenever there is difficult moments in Jewish history, [snorts] we do two things. We do the easy thing and we do the hard thing. And we need to do both. And there the easy thing is we got to defend ourselves. We got to fight back. I say easy because relative to the hard thing, it's much easier as you'll soon see. doesn't mean it's easy. Um, but the easier thing is to fight back, is to defend ourselves, is to protect ourselves. That's necessary. No question about it. But then we do the hard thing. We don't justify why it happened, but we also at the same time have some introspection. How did we position ourselves for this to even be possible? So the midrash says you know how we position ourselves to allow a malik into our lives to allow that crush of self-confidence and doubt in our lives. The spirit of a malik unfortunately still lives even if the nation does not. that spirit that says you're not worthy and there's just no reason. [snorts] You're just not worthy and we're willing to crush you for no good reason to spiritually crush you to tell you you're not good enough. You know how that's invited into our lives? So the midra says, "Well, look at what's juxtaposed next to it in the Torah. The prohibition of faulty faulty measuring tools. There's a connection of We might not be cheating, but we're owning something we shouldn't. We've mispositioned ourselves. And because we've mispositioned ourselves, we've invited a Malik into our lives. Put it this way. We're talking about owning weights that we shouldn't for false business for for for what's the word [sighs] for a lack of integrity of business integrity. The way the commentaries put it, we are giving weight to the wrong thing by owning that. We are prioritizing the wrong thing by owning that. And when we prioritize the wrong things in life, we invite the wrong things into our lives. When we prioritize the right things in our life, we invite goodness into our life. We create less space for negativity. A malik came and attacked us because we were weighed down by weights we shouldn't have owned. Even if we didn't actually cheat, but it was in us. And if we would have dropped that dead weight figuratively and literally, there would have been no space for a Malik to come in our life. At difficult moments in life, the very first thing we need to ask us ask ourselves is what is the most important thing? When I work with couples and they're going through a difficult time, there's fighting, there's distrust, there's a feeling of disconnection. There's two people that feel like they're living parallel lives like roommates. The very first thing I do, and not in this language, it's there's a little bit more of a tactful way of saying it, but I effectively say, "What is most important to you in life? What is that one thing you'd give up anything and everything for because it just matters so much? And how would you know you were closer to it if all the dead weight wasn't holding you back? Those corrupt measuring tools where we put weight to the wrong things didn't hold you back. What would you be most connected with? Because that is the most pure, happy, holy, safe version of you. >> [snorts] >> There's a rav in Israelic authority known as Rabbi Asher Weiss, an incredible scholar. He had wrote he had written uh tons of literature on um hahik like hakic medical ethics stuff like that. and he's like when it comes to medical ethical questions, he's often the go-to. You can look him up on YouTube, by the way. He's on YouTube. He has classes in English and he has a lot of uh teachings on on Jewish medical ethics. His name is Rabbi Asher Weiss. He has a very good English, [snorts] incredible Tal, incredible scholar. and he had a student that was serving in the military and his student got injured severely in war in the ID he was an IDF U reserve student he 20 years old got injured severely he's missing a leg missing an arm >> [snorts] >> Rabbi Weiss comes into the room and the very first thing this young student says, "Rabbi, I have important questions for you." Now, let me just pause for a second. What do you think he's going to ask the rabbi? like God, why why is God doing this to me? What I do to deserve this? Was it worth it? You know, you can get into political discussion. Why did this all you? This can go in many different directions. The rabbi is bracing for the question. Rabbi, I have important questions. I have three questions for you. Question number one, I have only one arm. I'm supposed to put tillin on my stronger arm, but I only have one arm. Which arm do I put my tillin on? I was putting on the fillain on the arm that had been blown off, but now it's only on I only have one arm. Do I put fillin on that arm? Do I just not put on fillain? That's question number one. [snorts] Question number two, I have to eat bread. And when I eat bread, I need to wash. Do I wash just my hand or do I wash also the arm? You had one arm with no hand. Do I just Do I have to wash the arm? Because sometimes that helpful for eating. You're supposed to wash your hands. Do you need to wash your arm if that's effectively my hand? That's question number two. Um, question number three. Sorry, there's actually four questions. Question number three, Rabbi, I'm going to be getting prosthetic arms. Hopefully around sukus time. Can I hold the lul of an esroer with my prosthetic arm? You're supposed to hold it with your hand. Is that considered my hand? Question number four. When my prosthetics come, is it considered does it have the status of a new garment where I would say the blessing of some people say the blessing of thinking God when they have new clothing, when they have new items, do I make [snorts] and I guess that was his custom. Do I make that braha? Ra, Rabbi Asher Weiss is just looking at this young guy and going, "Whoa." And he began to cry. The rabbi began to cry because this is a holy guy, holy kid. He's 20 years old. He has every right to complain against God. every light right or it would be understandable were he to say I don't believe anymore I'm done with this I fought for my people and this is how I'm treated and instead he wants to know how he could continue to prioritize what is most important to him is relationship with God how he could continue to give weight to the right thing at the same time not putting weight or giving weight to the wrong thing. Because when [snorts] we put weight on the right things in our life, when we don't possess scales or measuring tools for things that we should not be having, we don't even own those tools because we're our priorities are straight. We're focused on the right thing. relationships and life and faith and everything just flows so much more smoothly. And God says based on Rashi, this is the reason why he had taken us out of Egypt. That's the story. And I'm sticking to it.