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Stop doing, start becoming. Let me know if I can help.

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Rabbi Josh Zebberman avatar
Rabbi Josh Zebberman

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When couples unfortunately discover that they have a difficult time trusting their spouse or they have a difficult time earning trust from their spouse, the first thing that comes to mind is, "Oh no, what do I do?" Which is a very overwhelming question because how can anything you do possibly rebuild such feelings of betrayal? But here's a more manageable question. And instead of asking, "Oh no, what do I do?" Ask yourself, "Who do I need to become?" If I was the type of person that was more trusting, if I was the type of person that would want to find more trust, if I was the type of person that would want to earn more trust, if that were to show up in my life, what's the first thing I would notice that let me know the quality of trust were to return? It's a more transformative question and it makes the relationship more manageable. Let me know if I can help. [Music]