Parshas Ki Savo, Chai Elul, and How to Discover Joy on a Mountain of Curses

What happens when you want to connect, but you feel like the connection's lost? We're trying to reconnect in a relationship. We're trying to reconnect with our better selves. We're trying to reconnect with God, and we feel like the connection gone. You can't believe that. You can't believe that the connection is gone. If you want the connection to continue, you have to believe that the connection is no longer perceived for whatever reason, but still there. So, it's not a question of getting connected. It's just a question of having to perceive an existent connection. This idea by the way is very much underscored during Lol because on Rashashana we talk about a connection with God. We coordinate God as our king with the chauffear. We remind ourselves that he is the king and what he says matters and that there's this he's a venu our father our king. But the context of that is preceded by an entire month of el of I'm to my beloved, my beloved is to me. We're trying in order to perceive that connection, we have to kind of culture it. We have to develop it. We have to nurture it. And in this week's para paras, we're going to learn one of the pathways of unbearing an existent connection that seems to have been lost in in this week's para. And the truth is in throughout the whole book of Dvarim of Deuteronomy, Moshe is giving his parting words to the Jewish people as they're about to enter the promised land and giving them various commands. Some of the commandments in the book of Deuteronomy are not going to be relevant for the future generations, but relevant to that generation, the generation entering the land. And for Moshe, this is a new crowd. Relatively speaking, it's been 40 years since the Exodus of Egypt. And most people had died out already. That was thanks to the sin of the spies and and the fear-mongering and and everybody kind of doubting God. So God said, "This generation, you guys didn't want to go into the land. Fine. Your children will go into the land." So this is already the next generation. Mosha is talking to a bunch of young folk. He's the old guy and very few others remaining such as Joshua, Khalif, Pinas are there going to welcome and and and escort the the next generation into the land of Israel. So Mosha is doing everything and Mosha is not going to be with them. So he's doing everything he can to prepare them and he instructs them to take stones. Take 12 stones. On these 12 stones, etch within them the Torah. You're going to take it with you. You're going to cross the Jordan River. You're going to turn these stones into an altar. And where are you going to build this altar? On Mount Aval Har. So imagine, we don't have a map here, but okay. Yeah. My point, by the way, you're not only supposed to write the whole Torah on these 12 stones, you're supposed to translate them into 70 languages. Now, how are you supposed to fit the entire Torah on 12 stones? How are you supposed to fit 70 languages of the whole Torah on 12 stones? >> Yes. Exactly. So, so that is the approach that some commentaries actually take. Some say that it doesn't literally mean the whole Torah. means write down the 613 commandments of the Torah. Some say it refers to just the ten commandments, but some take a more literal approach and this is discussed among the commentaries Rashi Ramban and others. Some take a more literal approach and say that it literally is the Torah and how it fit. None of our business because we don't have to figure it out. It's not a commandment that is relevant to the future. It was a commandment that was relevant to them. So that's the approach some commentaries take. But to me, there's something that really I I found to be really uh got me really curious. They're commanded to take these stones, cross the Jordan River with it, enter the land, build it into an altar on Mount Aal Haral. Well, guys, what is Haral? What took place there? So in this week's para the next the very next section in the parha Moshe is going to convey the curses that are going to be proclamated at Mount Aal the blessings that are going to be uh announced or proclamated on Harrisim on Mount Griezim and the Jewish people are standing in the middle. So imagine you have the Jordan River which is the border between Israel and Jordan. They cross through the land of Eureko. This is going to be with Joshua later on. They make their way to Shrem is the city where Moshe is sorry where where Yseph is buried. They bury Yseph there. They're standing in. And is a valley surrounded by the mount the hier grieim the mountain of blessings and haral the mountain of a mountain of curses. They're going to listen to the blessings and to the curses. And it's a very intense reading. By the way, the tradition is that when we read this para, that portion of the curses, we don't call anybody up for that aliyah because we don't want to be like, okay, we're calling you up for the ten commandments, we're calling you up for the shama, and we're calling you up for the curses. And we don't want to do that, right? So, we don't call anybody up. Um there's the famous joke where there was a shul that would pay um like kind of like a panandler to take that aliyah. Nobody wanted to take it. So they'd pay him to take it. And for him it was a way of earning money. And they get up to the aliyah and he's not there. Nobody else wants to take the aliyah. They're waiting and waiting. And finally the guy comes in and he's huffing and puffing and they say, "Where were you?" He says, "You think I make a living off one curse? There's a lot of shs to go around. Okay. But but the reason why I say that is because it it's it's an intense moment. The tradition is that the person reading the Torah reads it in a quieter voice. And for some reason, it's on this mountain where the curses, this intense moment are proclamated. That the altar built out of stones that have the old Torah etched on them in 70 languages for everybody to understand and make meaning of, we place it specifically on the mountain of curses on Haral. That's what the Torah says. Why? Why don't we place it on the mountain of blessings? Why don't we place it in the middle where all the Jews are standing? One of the reasons why the Jews stand in between both mountains, the city of Shem, is because that's where Yseph's buried. And apparently Yoseph represents the ability to pivot from curse to blessing. That's what Yseph did in his life. He He had to He was like a He had to pivot in life. He had his plans and God had different plans and he had to pivot. And the classic example is piv pivoting from curses to blessings. Pivoting from from negativity to positivity is when his employer's wife put his wife tried to seduce him and it was tempting and he held back. It was a big pivot in his life. It was a pivotal moment in his life. He was imprisoned and he had discovered his true values, who he really is, his true connection to God, his true connection to his values. He was able to make that pivot. So the Jewish people are standing where Yseph is buried, representing this idea to be able to pivot from mountains of cursings to mountains of blessings. We ideally should be directing our attention toward the mountain of blessings. Why are we directing our attention toward the mountain of curses where that altar is built? So, I'd like to share with you two perspectives that commentaries share. And what I believe lies within these commentaries are incredible lessons in when our relationships seem cursed, when our relationships seem like they're just not what they used to be. Whether it be a relationship with God, whether it be a relationship with people and the commentaries tell us, well, there's a reason why the altar is there specifically. Let's start with a commentary known as the alik Mosha al- Mosha al-H is a commentary from the 1500s. He's a student of the Arizal Rabitzk Ashkanazi Lura the famed cabalist from here's what he says what's the significance of Haral of mount Aval you know why mount Aval is significant even though it's the mountain of curses because it wasn't always the mountain of curses it also represents something else in history in Jewish history go back to the book of Genesis where God promises that he's going to give this land to his people, to his children. This is going to be your promised land. Go forth and I'll show it to you. And God shows it to him. And Abraham is excited. His children are going to get this land. Now, God says, "There is going to be a detour. Your children are going to be slaves in Egypt. They're then going to be redeemed." Then there was this 40-year detour in the desert. And now here we are. And Abraham builds an altar, thanking God. And where was the spot that Ara had happened to build the altar? This is what the alik says right there. Haral, Mount Aal, specifically right there. So, the Jewish people come to the land of Israel and they build this altar that has the Torah etched into it because it's made of stone in this exact same spot where Abraham had built his altar. The Jewish people are coming full circle. Now, why is that important? Why is that significant? Like, it's cute, but but who cares? So, I think there's two reasons why there's why this is significant. Number one, from a practical standpoint, we need to understand that when we come into the land, it's not just because we're strong and we're good at conquering and we're good at pager operations and we're good at blowing up Qatar and we're that's not the reason why we're able to get into the land. Those things help. But the reason why we get into the land is because of the promise given to Afraim. And it's written on these stones. It's etched in stone. It's in 70 languages. Everybody could see it. That there's an age-old promise here that we're fulfilling. And that when we finally come to the land, we have to remember what our connection to the land truly is. Which means when we fail or if we fail and we disobey God and we follow the path of curses which happens to be at Mount Aval. We can remember that before this was a mountain of curses. This was a mountain where Araham celebrated his covenant and Ara had bequeathed that power to us. We've inherited from Abraham not only the values of monotheism and faith but something much deeper a much deeper inherent connection and should we find ourselves on this mountain of curses for whatever reason should we find ourselves in a relationship with God that seems bare that seems empty that seems like it's in the red at a deficit Should we find ourselves in a relationship with our fellow Jews that seem at a deficit? Well, let's reflect on what this mountain originally was. Let's go back there. You guys have heard me say this, but one of the things I always ask couples is how did you meet? Like, let's go back there. Take me there. You have two people sitting in a room that are going through a difficult time and sometimes there's anger and betrayal and distrust and I can ask questions about those and tell me about the curses and that will satisfy a lot of curiosity but that's not my job necessarily because if I ask them well before this was a mountain of curses what took place here tell me about Abraham trekking on this mountain tell Tell me about what your relationship was like when you had first met. They start describing a more preferable version of their relationship that they can later replicate. And this is what the alik is telling us that yes, you're going to go to the mountain of curses. But what was it once? It was a mountain where Aramino had celebrated his connection and we could pick up from that connection. I believe that this is possibly, this is just uh my own thoughts, but connected to Yakov picking up the stones at Haramaria, putting them around his head to protect himself. And commentaries wonder, well, how is the stones going to protect you? Because it says he put them around his head. Put 12 stones around his head, which protects his head. It doesn't protect the rest of his body. So, how's that going to help? Right, when he was camping. So, the alik, the same exact commentary says, well, where did he get stones from anyways? The Torah says he was traveling with nothing but his staff. He didn't have anything. So, where did he get stones? There were stones there. How convenient. There happens to be 12 stones there. Well, why were there 12 stones there? because of Ramavu just a generation prior had brought his son Isaac for the binding of Isaac and had built an altar. So what Yakov actually saw wasn't just 12 random stones but he saw an altar. He took those stones from Abraham and used them to protect protect him. He took the values what he had received from the previous generation and realized I could bring that with me even though the night is dark and it's scary and I'm alone and I'm by myself and there may be negative forces attacking me I could take those values to stay safe and I think this is the same thing that the alik a similar idea that the alik is mentioning when the Jews get to Mount Aal it wasn't always mount a it was a mountain that used as sacrifices One of the classic commentaries known as theuni says a similar idea that the Jewish people get to Mount Aval where they hear all the curses and some people may find themselves figuratively speaking on that mountain. They may find themselves in a space where they're cursed, a space where they have disobeyed God, a space where they have isolated themselves from God, a space where they have isolated themselves from each other. And when we do find ourselves in that space, we don't have to give up on ourselves. We don't have to say, well, that's it. When we give when we find ourselves in that space, we remember that Moshe gave us these stones to take with us and told us specifically there. Build an altar, build connection, build opportun because what's an altar? You bring a corban. A corban is a a sacrifice, a gift to God. You know what the word corban means? Comes from the word kov closeness. Build yourself opportunity to come close to God. to come close with your people, to come close with your soul. Even on the mountain of curses, despite it being a mountain of curses, you can still connect. There's nothing stopping you from connecting. I had recently come across a letter that the Labavature had penned to somebody in response to um basically somebody had had either had somebody whom they had a relationship with. I don't know if it was friends or family or what the connection was, but somebody found that their acquaintances were in prison for whatever reason. And prison is no fun. Prison is not a place where you prison is a place where you survive. You survive not only because of the prison's conditions, but in general prison is a is really a bad place where you have to fend for your life. And often Ben values literally to not get killed by other people depending on what type of prison one is in. Prison is a very scary place. And the Reb offered brilliant words of comfort. It was such an insightful letter. Um, and to be honest, I I got to believe that from an inmate reading this letter, it's probably a difficult letter to read because it's true and truth is very uncomfortable. But if you're open to hearing the truth, it will be inspiring. And here and I'm going to paraphrase and share the ideas that I had read from this letter that I had gleaned from this letter that what is prison? Prison is this space of confinement. And the truth is, this is what the Reb says in this letter that everybody's confined. We could all empathize with the pain that you're in. Every single person is confined. Every single Jew is confined. You know why? Because prior to being born, the soul was in heaven. And the soul's experience of God was real. Its love for God was unmeasurable. Maybe it was measurable, but it was beyond what what we could ever fathom. Its reverence and respect for God beyond what we could fathom. the confidence that our souls had being basking in the ray of God. These are things we can just use uh talk about with words but not really get. And then we're born we're born into a body. We're given life experiences. We're thrown opportunities to feel insecure, to feel lost, to feel lonely. And all these beautiful qualities that the shining soul has gets covered up by a body gets covered up by life. And it doesn't mean that the soul is no longer here. The soul is very much here. But it's in prison. It's in prison because it doesn't get to be itself. The Reb is writing this to this person saying like we can all empathize on some level. Obviously, we don't have the physical pain that you're going through. But the idea of feeling constricted and feeling like I don't get to be me, the truest version of me, the most godly divine version of me fully. That's prison, man. And the Reb had then said, "This person that you're referencing is not only in prison, but he's like in a double prison because he's in the soul and the body and then the body in a prison. It's like a two-layered prison." And you know what we do when we're in prison? We realize like Yoseseph when he was in prison that I wasn't sold here. I was sent here. Yseph could have easily have victimized his situation and said, "What did my brothers do to me? Why did I get into this?" But instead, Ysef thought to himself, "I'm not sold. I'm sent." Like, I'm here for a reason. And I could literally find connection here. He ended up connecting with the people, other pe inmates in prison, asking them about their spirits, trying to lift them up, and ultimately he ended up being freed. When we realize that even though we're in prison, we're sent here for a reason. And the reason isn't just to escape prison, although we might like to, but it's to find connection within prison. within the body, within the constriction, within the limitation, within the diminished confidence, within the washed out passion that we once had. We somehow find an ability to connect by making time to study Torah, by doing mitzvah, by dotting, literally reflecting on this itself can remind us of an existent connection. We find opportunity to connect and what happens is what we discover is freedom and it's a different kind of freedom because it's a freedom that is not dependent on the circumstances around us. It's not a circumstantial freedom. It is an inherent freedom. The Maharal of Prague writes, you know, the Maharal of Prague, Rabbi Udala of Prague has beautiful writings and books and one of his books called the Israel and he has a few others are literally just describing the Exodus from Egypt, whole book on it, just describing it from a mystical perspective. One of the things he says is that what did the Exodus from Egypt accomplish if we're still being oppressed by other nations? One of the things that it accomplished is it gave us inherent freedom. Even if we're oppressed by other people, we have the ability to be free because of who we are, not just because of where we are. And now that we're in prison, we're in a body and we discover connection. We're no longer victim to the prison. We're no longer victim to freedom outside of ourselves because we've discovered freedom within ourselves. But what happens after that? That freedom, that freedom internally begins to radiate outside ourselves. It begins to illuminate our surroundings. And you see it somebody who's inspired, somebody who's comfortable with their soul, somebody who's comfortable with their nishama, it's like, what is he on? Where can I get some of that quick? Manis Friedman, Rabbi Manis Freedman shares a story of a friend he had had back in Minnesota who was a Holocaust survivor. And Rabbi Manis Friedman tried sharing with him opportunities to connect to his Judaism and he was uninterested. He was burnt. He was just burnt out and angry understandably. though. One day, this was back in the 80s, he was flipping through TV and he I guess was intending on watching Monday Night Football or whatever it was and he came across Rebe who was being broadcasted from 770 from World Headquarters. He was sharing Torah and Yiddish and this guy is mesmerized. This is a guy who doesn't want to connect with God, doesn't want to connect with religion, doesn't want to put on nothing. And he's mesmerized by a rabbi with a hat and a beard talking to thousands of people in Yiddish about the Torah portion. And Manis Friedman says, "What is going on here? Explain. What did you see here? I saw a Jew who was so unbashful, just so comfortable with his soul, so comfortable with himself. It's like, where can I get some of that? That type of inner freedom radiates beyond. It radiates outside of ourselves. And the Reb had proceeded to share with this person struggling with a a a friend or acquaintance who was an inmate, saying that when we adapt this, this will evolve into physical freedom because they go they they shorten sentences for good behavior. And the reason is because you're internally free. And if you're really internally free, you have to be externally free. Because truth, real truth is going to be true everywhere. So start discovering inner freedom and you'll experience circumstantial geographical freedom. This is what the Reb had shared in the letter. Even on Mount Aval, even where these curses are, we build an altar. We realize that it was once a mountain where Arainu had offered sacrifices to God where our story had begun where our connection had begun. The connection's always there. I just want to share one more point that uh in a couple of days this Thursday is the 18th of Elo. The 18th of Elo is klo. It's the day that we increase or or bring in extra vitality means life. We bring more life into Elo. It's the day that the BM was born. It's the day that the Alba, the author of the Tanya was born. It's effectively the day that the whole perspective of of looking at our inherent connection with our soul with God the service that comes with it was born effectively and it's the day that we get to bring that into el sometimes can seem like a time of melancholy because it's a time of reflection. It's a time of tshoua. It's a time of let's reconcile before the new year. At the same time, within that melancholy, within that mountain of what may seem like a mountain of curses that we have to run away from, it's there that we find joy, that we build an altar, and we realize that deep down inside under all that connection still exists and is very much present. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.