Content is a band-aid. Context heals.

When couples find that their relationship is in like a really bad place, there's reasonable distrust, disrespect, there's shutdowns, if you want to heal from this type of uh situation, there has to be a [music] shift. And that shift is from thinking about the content of the relationship to the context of the relationship. The content of the relationship are the things you do in the relationship to try to make the relationship better. [music] That could be communication. That could be things you do to demonstrate respect. That could be different ways of showing up. These are [music] content. If you just focus on the content, that can help, but you're more likely [music] to just band-aid the situation. If you actually want to fundamentally heal your relationship, you can't just focus [music] on content. You have to focus on the context. The context in which [music] the content exists. The communication has a wider context. It's not just two people talking. And the context of the relationship that fundamentally heals is actually [music] friendship. When couples learn to be friends with each other and they learn to be friends with each other by being better friends with themselves, [music] by being more comfortable with themselves, by learning to be happier people, they can feel lighter. The relationship can feel lighter. That creates a context where there will be more meaningful [music] content, better communication, better love, better respect, better connection all over. That creates a context where healing can