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Ask yourself this tough question
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Categories:Torah/Mussar
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When couples go through a difficult
time, they usually want to know why.
This is true, by the way, with anybody
who's going through any type of
suffering. People want to know why. And
I don't just mean like theologically,
like why is God doing this to me? That
too. But what I mean is like
pragmatically, why is this happening? So
we can figure out how to stop it. Ask
not just why is this happening, but ask
why do you want it to be better? If it
was better, why would that be important
to you? If your relationship with your
spouse was much better than it ever has
been, what kind of person would that
make you into? What kind of person would
you be? If you were suffering less, what
would you be experiencing more? Why does
that matter to you? Because when you
discover the why, what you really
discover is motivation.
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