What Do You REALLY Want? | Living with Emunah #376

Good morning, Booker. Welcome back to Living with Amuna. Always an honor, a privilege, and pleasure to learn together, grow together, and to work on our Amuna together. The Amuna series is generously sponsored by Dr. Zavian Bella Morgan in memory of Rabbi Dr. Brian Gabbed, and in memory of Bella's mother, Dr. Ellen Shanzer. We remain tremendously grateful to the Morgans for their generosity. series is also co-sponsored anonymously in memory of the 30 fallen soldiers and alumni of benedavidi who fell on October 7th and during the war and our learning is dedicated in their memory. Today we're highlighting major Etan Urbach killed uh December 2025 in a tragic accident after completing volunteer guard duty in the Jordan Valley. He served in the reserves of the security operations officer responsible for protecting local farms. After finishing a shift, a vehicle carrying him and a friend overturned. He survived by his wife and by five children for those soldiers who were killed while fighting and for those heroes who fought for us. Today she is sponsored anonymously and by Louisis Deutsch in loving memory of Harry Steinberg Edith Steinberg nugget and Matias n uh matus nougat and anonymously the shear infuses my life with meaning. Thank you anonymously by in recognition of the amuna that everyone is growing with anonymously my dear father uh thank you to all of our incredibly uh generous sponsors for helping the amuna she this morning we uh continue to run our beer global campaign and we will run it till we're at 100%. We're at 61%. So, we've got a little way to go. Huge thank you to those who've given. You see the banner behind me. We deeply deeply appreciate it. We don't take it for granted. I wrote an article this week uh p published it last night about we're living in a time in which it's giving us this false sense of entitlement. Gmail is free and ways is free and chatg is free and there's so much that's free that we feel entitled. We feel we deserve. We have an expectation that it should all be free. And we stream and we download and we use and we email and we just expect. What do you mean? That's just a given. That's an entitlement. That's just one of the privileges that comes with being alive in this day and age. But it's not true. We always pay. Sometimes you're paying with your data and your privacy. You're a you are you are the product. You're being sold as a data point. But other times there are people who are paying in order to provide. And that's the case here. So we ask for your partnership. If you're a BRS member, you're doing your part. Thank you. If you're not a BRS member, we ask everyone to do their part. Fact that you have a shear. Instead of all the emails, it changes my life. It improved my life. It impacted my life. It got me through my life. Help us partner with us. Make a difference. I want to share. And you can then be entered into a raffle. Freezing cold up north and come thaw out in Bokeh. Warm up in Bokeh. Two plane tickets to Florida. Experience Shabas BRS meal hosted at the rabbis homes. You never had a better meal than Y Goldberg. Maybe the only better meal that you could have is if you give 1,800 or more, you are entered into a second raffle that I personally will put on my apron and cook you dinner. So, you want to do that. I love >> you can get your tickets and you'll be entered into those raffles. And that's what I want to read. My first email today, listen to this email. This actually wasn't an email. This was accidentally posted on the global website, prssonline.org/global, which is where you can give. We know who gave previously. And if you've given yet this year or not, we know if you haven't given at all and you come and take advantage. We know. We know. Just like all the tech companies are tracking and they have all the data. We know and we're watching and we see. So when you email and you contact and you want the cup of coffee and you want the giveaway, of which we have more today. We know if you've done your part. Your part could be a dollar if that's what you could afford. It could be a million dollars if that's what you could afford. But we appreciate it. But listen to this. Somebody posted this actually by accident. and she wrote afterwards to me, "Oh, I didn't realize that when you write that, everybody can see it. I didn't mean for everyone to see it, but that too was the way it was meant to be. Dear Rabbi Goldberg, I've been listening for two and a half years, and while I've had many stories to share, the one that happened last month led me to donate once again this year. Last month, we were going to make a sim in our home. I put away a significant amount of funds in an envelope for shopping. But on the days leading up to the sim, I couldn't find the envelope. I looked in my pocketbook. I looked everywhere, and I mean everywhere. Finally, I looked to Hashem and I said, "Okay, this is where the years of learning about amuna have brought me to." Obviously, I'm not meant to have the money. If I lost it and someone found it, I hope the person who found it was meant to have it more than I was. And if it was simply lost, then I was never meant to have it. I continued shopping, bought what I needed, thanked Hashem for helping me find another way to pay. This week, while emptying out the same pocketbook, I found the envelope at the bottom of the bag. It was not there last month, or at least I didn't see it. I guess Hashem didn't want me to see it then, but opened my eyes now. I found it on the same day as I got your WhatsApp about the global campaign. At first, when I got the message, I thought about donating at the same level as last year, but I was unsure how I would afford it. Then I realized the money really wasn't for me. It was hidden so I would find it now to donate to the organization that has brought me closer to Hashem and helped me develop my amuna each and every day, Kola Cavode. And with that, she gave $1,800. >> That's what was in the envelope. And that's what she gave to our Emun. That's might be my favorite of all time. [laughter] No. Isn't that amazing? Set it aside, looked for it, couldn't find the day she needed it, found it the day she got my WhatsApp. And and I wrote back and I said, "You know, I get amazing living with Amuna emails, but people don't usually pay $1,800 for the email. To be willing to pay $1,800." She could have said, "I lost it. I found it now. It was mine all along. I didn't need it for the Simhka." But you know what? Everybody knows posts. You need to pay for a little therapy from the SIMA. So there's retail therapy and there's manicure therapy and there's a real therapy. But she didn't say, "I'm going to use it on the post recovery." She said, "I found it in the envelope. I found it when I was meant to find it. I found it on the day I got the WhatsApp and here it is and God bless you and thank you and Hashem meant for you to po to post it online. Maybe others are inspired to do it too. Maybe those sitting here right now. Look in your pocketbook. Maybe you'll find something. [laughter] Feel free to leave it. If not, pasonline.org/global. Okay. Dear Goldberg, I've been meaning to write an email for weeks, but every time I try, I don't know where to start. Each time I hear one of your shirum, you say something that feels like you're talking directly to me, and I think I need to write the email. Then this Sunday, I was struggling to finish my monthly half marathon in 10 degree weather. And I was listening to the Amuna. Let's just stop there with that little flex. [laughter] I was struggling to finish my monthly half marathon in 10 degree weather. And listening to the amunes here, you began to talk to me. You began to talk about how you can't say you're a runner unless you actually run. And I just thought, okay, now that's another nod. I better sit down and write. So, first off, thank you for helping me through because there was really a brutal run. Not that what this really this message is about. This is a message for all the people going through hardships. It's a story that did not tie into a perfect bow quickly. It began 26 years ago. At 10 months old, my first child, a beautiful baby girl, was diagnosed with a brain tumor. Her early years were filled with surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation. After four years in and out of treatment, she bar went into remission. The years that followed had unique complications that many of his children have gone through something like this can probably relate to. This started before WhatsApp, podcast, and all the support we have now. But it was its own amuna journey. It took me to some of the highest heights and the lowest lows. And the regular life challenges of having and raising a family, losing a parent unexpectedly in the midst of all the treatments recovering and recalibrating after traumatic illness has created has certainly been a journey. All along I felt connected to Hashem, but there were times when it felt he was just piling one thing after another on me. And I wondered what message I could possibly be missing. Sometimes my discussions with Hashem were angrily yelling, other times joyfully thanking. But as long as we were on talking terms, I figured we would survive. I love that insight. As long as we were on talking terms, and I can tell you that as somebody who does a fair amount of meeting with couples and relationships that are in distress, always, by the way, referring to a competent therapist, I believe rabbis and others all have to stay in their lane. But, but when a couple meet with you and they're checked out, apathetic, indifferent to one another, sitting silently, it's a bad sign. when they're angry and yelling and screaming, it's not a healthy form of communication, but they're engaged. They're still in the game. They're still talking. They're still invested. There's still something there. And so, I love that metaphor or that description in our relationship also or equally with Hashem. When you're checked out, when you're apathetic, when you're indifferent, when you don't hear him talking to you and you have no interest or urge to talk to him, that's when the relationship might be in trouble. It's not over. Inside us is always that pintid. We can wake up. We will wake up. We spent a long time learning. When we finish indexing, we'll be able to find exactly where. But we learned about ruts of avo and the idea that we're sometimes closer, we're sometimes more distance, we're sometimes on a high and we're sometimes on a low and that as long as we're in the game, as long as we're connected, as long as we're in those conversations. So whether our conversation with Hashem is all about how disappointed, how frustrated, how angry, how resentful, or our conversation is about thank you, I'm undeserving and I appreciative and I can't believe it, but as long as we're in a conversation with him, then we're going to be okay. Back to the email. A few weeks ago, we married off this beautiful daughter. It was obviously a beautiful s as any wedding is and your child finding the right person is more than enough to be grateful for. But this wedding in particular was an even more poignant event because the journey that my daughter has had in life has not been simple. We felt hashem is in every part of the shabas something you said in the par about why we keep thanking Hashem for taking us out of because once isn't enough for something as incredible as that. And I took that chance to thank Hashem for saving her and bringing us to that day to this incredible point in her life. Another pause. I always tell you that the Torah isn't after the emails. The emails are just a conduit to teach Torah. They trigger Torah. They remind us of Torah. What is she referring to? I say we're obsessed. My kids would say, "You're obsessed with leaving Egypt. Why are you so obsessed with leaving Egypt? All you do is talk about leaving Egypt." We say in our in the morning and at night, you're obsessed. What's with the obsession? Okay, we left. Good. We're gone. It's been a few years that we've been out. Why are we still talking about it? Why are you still obsessed with it? And the answer is there are landmark milestone gamechanging events in our lives that are so transformational, we never stop saying thank you. We never stop saying thank you. If a person had a heart attack on the side of the road and somebody intervened, stopped and saved them. Someone was rescued and pulled from a burning car. If a surgeon saved your life when everyone else gave up on you, would you say I sent a card and I said thank you. What I said thank you on the way out of the hospital and they wheeled me out. I said, "Thank you." And they put me in the hot salah and they took me from the firing car, fiery cars. I said, "Thank you." I even sent flowers, maybe a box of chocolate. Okay, good. I said, "Thank you." Nobody would ask and wonder and challenge why you so obsessed with thanking the person who saved your life. said, "Because I could never, ever, ever, ever adequately say thank you. I'm never done saying thank you. And every day I wake up, I say thank you again. I'm here. Every step I take, I say thank you. I am still here." And every sim I celebrate, I say, "Thank you. I'm still here." And that's the way we are about Shalom. Thank you. Because if you hadn't taken us out as we'll say soon at the Seder, I say soon at the Seder, you the women and I, we know exactly how close Pes is. The men are oblivious. They think it's still tishvat. They're still opening the gifts. They have no idea how close pes we know. We get it. We get how close pes is. So soon at the seder we'll still be saying thank you because if you hadn't take us taken us out, we'd still be we'd still be there physically or emotionally or spiritually or ideologically or religiously or nationally. We'd still be there. So every day we wake up and we say instead we're here. Look at what's going on. When you walk on this campus and you see it being built and expanded, you see what's going up. You see how wonderful, magnificent hashem. When you see today there are countless minanam plus a brisk plus the kola boker plus two shirum. And so we don't have space. I gave the tanyir this morning in the old lobby in a corner next to the cubby with people taking their talises outem. You could complain and be miserable and frustrated that there's no space to give a shir and I was relegated to the cubby. I basically peaked my head out of the cubby to say the shir and you could say this is unbelievable. This is amazing. Our campus is hopping and ben and there's no room for anything and cla and what do I say? Thank you Hashem for taking us out of Mit. We could still be slaves in Mit. We could still be subject subjects of parro. We can still be worshiping those gods. We should still be following those superstitions. And instead, thank you, Hashem. You took us out of it every day. Thank you, Hashem. Never stop saying thank you. Thank you, Hashem. Thank you, Hashem. Spoke on tubishvaton. And I mentioned that one of these celebrations of Tubishvat is the miracle. Dava will eat the fruit of Israel, the Shiva, the seven species associated specifically with the land of Israel. And I said that pretty impressively. Seven species associated. That was pretty good. That's a tongue twister. We s we eat though specifically on tubishvat. Why? What's part of the celebration? The miracle. Tubishvat is all about in the harshness and the darkness of winter somewhere buried underneath all that snow or frost there are buds beginning to form. There's sap beginning to move. There's beginning to blossom. And that's exactly the Jewish people. There's a gar derives from it that the biggest piece of evidence of the Jewish return of a bright Jewish future of the light beyond the darkness of the beginning of redemption is what? When the land of Israel begins to produce when the land of Israel begins to sprout. When the desert begins to blossom when for 2,000 years nobody could make anything come out of that ground. And the Jewish people since 1948 and all of a sudden it's all green and lush and magnificent and amazing. Our friends in Khaluta, our friends who established Khalutza on the border of Egypt, Gaza, and Israel, land that in previous negotiations, Yaser Arafat said, "Are you out of your mind? I'll never take that. You can't make anything grow there. That's desert. Nothing's ever worked." Okay, until you did Yaharouch goes there. And then he plants and all of a sudden it's green and blossoming and beautiful and magnificent. It's a incredible. So, we're thankful every day. Every day we're saying thank you, Hashem. Look at the miracle. Look at the redemption. Look at what's happening. We never done saying thank you for the things that we're grateful for that we don't take for granted. That didn't have to be this way. That didn't have to be this way. So, back to this email. That's the idea that we taught in the para class. And that's what she says. I took that chance speaking at the Shabas Kala for her daughter even though here it is 26 years later, her daughter is getting married to thank Hashem for saving her and bringing us to this day to this incredible point in her life. as I truly do thank him for every chance I get. So I guess this is a way to both thank you for strengthening everyone who listens remind all those people in the midst that there's another side they'll get there. It might take longer than they expect but there's a plan Hashem when you least expect it and even with all this there are many things that come up and I have to dig deep and remember that Hashem is guiding the way even if it feels incredibly distant in that moment. It's a lifelong challenge to keep remembering that he is there with us even when things seem dire with appreciation. Thank you so much for that email. Moving right along. Dear by Goldberg, I used to listen to the amazing Amunir all the time, but I haven't put it on in a really long time. Today, I finally put it on hoping it would give some amuna and help me see Hashem in my life because lately that's pretty hard. I listened to the one where you're reading an email about somebody who wanted to see a hug from Hashem and saw the Reba card fall out of the sitter and I scoffed thinking, "How can you tell yourself that's a hug from Hashem?" It just seemed far-fetched. But as I opened my email to write one to you asking where on earth is Hashem, I saw a draft of an email I never sent to you. It was about a hug from Hashem that I received last year. And that felt like the biggest hug from him. Although I'm still really struggling to embrace my place and realize I'm where I meant to be. This was really cool to experience and it feels like Hashem is telling me to keep trying, not give up. Thank you for the shar. I hope to listen now more often. Had given up. Went to write an email about where is Hashem? What a joke. found the draft of an email never sent telling a story about when she got a hug from Hashem. Reminded her that we are getting those hugs. Got to extend the antenna. We got to look around. We got to find it. I haven't mentioned in a long time. But we have to activate the hashkah what's groups in our lives or the hashkah journals in our lives. Every day write down every day at the dinner table once a week on shabas. Go around and ask where did you see Hashem in your life? Where did you feel it? Where did you recognize it? Where did you feel the wink, the nod, the hug from Hashem that you can say thank you for? There always are so many. Here's another one. I thought you'd like this. I've been trying to be more mockb and taking off Russia's kala each week, but this week my family was flying to Bulgaria and I asked a friend to have me in mine since I knew I wouldn't be able to take kala. There I was sitting at breakfast Friday morning in the kosher hotel and the chef came out and walked straight to our table, looked at me and said, "Would you like to take a fresh kala? >> [clears throat] >> I started to cry feeling such a hug from Hashem. When we want a mitzvah and have a strong willingness, Hashem sends it straight to us. What a hug. Thank you for the sharim. All always bringing me inspiration. Good shabas. The global link works from Bulgaria. By the way, just [laughter] psaline.org/global Bulgaria. What language do they speak in Bulgaria? >> Bulgarian. >> Bulgarian. That's a langu of course you knew that was a language. Bulgarian. Okay. Bulgarian. Anyway, global works from there, too. Isn't that beautiful? We say in our diving every morning, fortunate, blessed, praiseworthy is the one who hears the mitzvah. Mitzvah are calling our name. They're calling our name. The mitzvah are speaking to us. They're inviting us. They're inspiring us. They're empowering us. Mitzvah aren't just a list of to-dos I got to do. They're errands. They're burdens. I just got to check them off. I've just got to do them. They're calling us invitations, opportunities to connect, to feel his presence, to get that hug. For her, the mitzvah of separating kala was calling her name. And even when she left on vacation, it followed her there because it called her name. TJ Maxx in Garden City, New York. We got a Psalm 23 sighting. They are selling selling Psalm 23. Psalm 23. Psalm 23 sighting at TJ Maxx in Garden City, New York. Thank you for it. I was recently visiting Florida with my husband. We really enjoyed attending your class over a year ago. My husband even arranged for a car so we can make the long drive from where we're staying to attend the parashes as we're visiting for so short. Did I read this last week? For various reasons, it wasn't so feasible and I was really disappointed. Instead, we went out for breakfast. Did I read this last week? >> I was debating in my head if I should have pushed harder and felt a little bad that we landed up in a restaurant instead of the parishes. We were busy eating our omelets when my husband discreetly pointed and asked, "Do you think those are soldiers?" I looked up and I saw a man with a keepa benching with a deep covan. What stood out though was that he had a prosthetic arm. I looked at the rest of the table and they were all young men looking around 18 years old. Only the one was wearing a keepa. They all glowed with holiness. Their eyes were much older. We confirmed with the waiter that yes, they were indeed IDF soldiers. My husband on the spot said, "Send me the bill. I'll pay, but please don't tell them." The waiter did tell them. There went his tip and they came over to our table to thank us. Instinctively, we stood up for them. It turns out they were from an organization which supports wounded soldiers. My husband asked if they come to Canada. These people live in Canada. And the organizer said, "No, but they were thinking about it." And then he said in Hebrew to us, "There are no coincidences. Perhaps this is why we met." He wasn't wearing a cape on his head, but his heart was full of amuna. I was really sad we didn't make it to Bokeh, but this story told me that we were where we were meant to be. And yes, I entered the raffle, so I did myas to make it to Bokeh another time. [laughter] She paid for their meal, and if she wins, we'll have them for our meal. And if she gives enough, maybe she can get my meal. How good is my meal? Steak, fries. We went out this week and we had a good steak. Was it as good as my steak? No. Okay, thank you. She's having no part of this. Absolutely not. I am on my own. Okay. Shalom Rabbi Goldberg, longtime listener, consumer of the Tor generously share. Yes, I will donate to the global campaign. I want to share an encounter that just happened that my pre-living with Amuna self may not have appreciated it much. I was at work this morning when I got an email from my daughter in sixth grade. Yes, annoyingly email parents during the day from their laptops, which is a different topic. That she forgot her lunch at home. My job is near the kids school intentionally, so if things come up, I'm not too far away. I had extra rough manus in this case because last night she took time to prep a nice lunch for herself. I wrote her back that I could come around 12:15 to drop something off. One thing led to another, and I was delayed because of work, plus the bad weather makes the streets less passable. On the main busy street on the drive over to school, I saw a car with hazards on in the left lane. As I approached, noticed it was my son's first grade Moa. She was frantically attempting to clean her car as a massive amount of frozen snow ice must have fallen forward forward from the roof onto her windshield. Despite being rudely honked, I pulled in front of her, jumped out, and immediately ran to help her. She was extremely stressed, and between the two of us, we worked for a few to remove the snow and ice so she could safely drive. I ran back to my car, feeling like I genuinely helped her and was really in a place I was meant to be. She called me a few moments later to thank me, and I told her the credit really goes to my daughter and her forgotten lunch. And of course the orchestration of how Hashem timed this. I know this isn't a major breakthrough in amuna but before the shirum I never would have thought anything about it. Maybe not even seen it as meaningful a lens. Thank you for continuing to inspire claiming these things. yada yada should be big for your family until 120. A main best so and so from Alaska aka New Jersey. [laughter] So but again extend the antenna and pick up the signal and the hugs and the winks. It's so annoying. Shiv forgot a lunch. I can't believe I have to drive it. Exactly when the first grade mura was stuck in the snow and the ice and the honking and running late and the opportunity to help. We could be going through life so fast with so much noise that we're missing the signal and we're missing the hugs and the winks and the nods that we so need and that gives us so much strength and that brings us so much happiness and we have to be careful not to. Okay, there are of course many more, but let's get back to our Torah learning together. Oh, there's so many more. Couple more. You guys like the emails more than anything else. Okay, one more. We'll do one more. I want to share my beautiful story with you as I'm sitting Shiva for my father this week. My father had a heart condition over the past several weeks. I saw his decline. As my father got up in years, I would call him every day, every morning and afternoon. In one of those calls, he told me he found some letters my grandparents had written to him and he sent them to me in the mail. For various reasons, I was not in the head space to read the letters with the proper focus and concentration. I told my dad I would read the letters when I had time to read without distraction. On one evening of Shiva this week, after Shiva visits were over, I sat down with my son and we read the letters together. It was truly hashkah that I was able to read the letters during Shiva because of what the letters were about. First, there were a few letters my grandmother had written to my father with good wishes for his birthday. My father passed away a day before his birthday. So, reading birthday wishes from his mother shortly after his passing was especially meaningful. Another two letters were written August 1945. It was from my grandmother who was writing about Ba who was my father's bubby. My grandmother was writing about how she got to see her grandmother before she passed away from a weak heart. In the letters my grandmother wrote about how she had such a nice she had sent a nice dress to muba and how she was wanted to see a photo but it was not to be because she had passed. It was so touching to read these letters at this time. It was interesting to read my grandmother wanted to send her mother she never received because just before my dad's passing I sent him a birthday card which he also never received. The other interesting thing my grandmother when mentioned her mother had a weak heart. My father also had a weak heart. Seeing the parallel situations through reading letters from my grandmother which were so similar were heartwarming and comforting. I could not have found a better time to read them than during Shiva. I finally believe that the letters my dad had sent me were a hug from Hashem and I read them exactly the right time to give me the I needed this week. It's really an amazing image that her father sent her letters and then passed away and she read them to find the comfort she needed in his loss. Finally, I want to share I plan to honor my father's nishama after Shiva in a way that's meaningful. My father loved going specifically the kabad. I know that people take on something extra in the merit of a person's nisha after they pass away. What better goal to take on than learning about ding. My goal is to learn sitter snippets not from number 700 but to start from number one from the beginning mod. You often say that we listeners of should listen to other too. I think that making a commitment to learn sitter snippets with consistency would be a great for my father's n and I couldn't agree more. as nama should have an aliyah and she should find and comfort and I thank her for taking the time to read and I encourage you last night we had a wonderful summ sitter snippets that we began over seven years ago we started from mod ani making our way through the sitter word by word line by line what does it mean what's the theme what could we be thinking about how can it impact us and we went all the way from mod ani through the end of was 704 snippets to make it all the way. Um, each one approximately six minutes. And I use the word approximately, approximately six minutes. And we're continuing now. We're not done. There's so much more to do. But sometimes you have to pause to take pride. That's okay. Sometimes we're again, we're always in motion and we're moving so fast and there's so much noise that sometimes it's okay. We need to press pause in order to in order to take pride. uh not the unhealthy type of pride but the good type of pride to be grateful for the opportunity and the learning. So we had an online summ and people joined from all over including from Israel at 3:30 in the morning in Israel to make a little and then we had a question and answer and conversation all about file. I recorded it maybe I'll post it maybe I won't. We'll see. But sitter snippets is a great limud if you want to take something on. As I said last night we don't think about it this way but it does actually connect. It's a perfect segue back to our learning because we're learning and we've been learning about dinninging for davening for a breakthrough in spirituality for healthy amuna and so I mentioned last night a few things one of which is someone said what did I take away from sitter snippets how has it impacted and improved my dvening and certainly the comprehension the translation the interpretation the commentary on the words have impacted me they've elucidated it I have a greater understanding of them but really it's the living with That makes the sitter snippets. If you don't have a relationship with someone, if you don't love them, if you don't feel they love you, if you don't care about them, then you're not going to want to communicate with them. Once you love them, once you care about them, once you feel they care about you, sometimes we need to work on communication. Need to find the right words and speak their love language and so on. But if you don't have a good relationship, a healthy relationship, then there's going to be no room for communication. So yes, it's important to understand all the translation of the words of the sitter and so on. But we need to have if you don't know before whom you stand, what you're talking about, what you care about, what you're thinking about, you're not going to dive in. You're not going to dive in. So number one is you got to work on a on a good and a healthy relationship. Number two, I said is, as I've been saying here, you got to look at your schedule. Look at your calendar. Later today, I have the privilege of speaking at a is conference happening in Miami. So, I still have to figure out exactly what I'm going to say and take advantage. I'm speaking for very short, which is much much much much harder than if you're speaking for very long. How to pack a punch and how to leave an impact and how to So, Hashem and I had a whole conversation this morning. We had a whole conversation. I said I said, "Hashem, this is it's not about me. It's about you. I'm working for you. I'm working on your behalf. So, please help me. Help me find the right words that are going to leave the right message, the right tone, the right impact, the right inspiration, the right motivation. Help me. Let's be partners in this. Help me. Now, we sit down. Let's work on it together. So, if you look at what you have on tap that day that's going to motivate, that's going to inspire. We've been talking a lot about that. I hope you've been employing that. In some ways, don't open your phone before you do in in the morning because that will negatively impact your doining. But if there's a way of put your phone on airplane mode and don't look at the messages that have come in, only look at your calendar. look at your calendar or the night before look at or print out your calendar stick it in your sitter or tom and that morning again I don't know what can motivate your dabing more than looking at your calendar I don't know anyone who has a calendar in which they don't need to ask for any help or express gratitude if your calendar says have nothing to do today lie on the lounge chair sipping pina coladas collecting money in my account with my servants waiting on me with naka's pictures pouring in. If that's what your calendar says you're doing that day, you have the most to daven for to say thank you for that incredible gift and to davin, please don't let anything happen to it. There's no one whose calendar says anything that they don't have to either ask for, say thank you for. So to me, the great motivator of davening is the calendar and then taper the to the schedule. What's happening that I need to ask help or say thank you for in that's number two. Number three I said last night and I'll repeat to you this morning is that the sitter is a safer. Often we have bookcases full of and thearum are what we underline and mark up and write in the margin. I told you that when we gave out thanks to our generous anonymous donor countless copies of and I told you mark it up wear it out. Your children and grandchildren should not inherit a library of books whose binding were never broken. They shouldn't inherit a library of books that are covered in dust. They should inherit a library of books that you wonder, "Huh, I wonder if anyone ever opened this." They should inherit books that are falling apart, that are writing in the margin, that have underlines all over, that have highlights all over, that the binding is broken, it's barely holding on. Those are the books they should inherit. That's the relationship we should have with our so that's true for all the swarm that we have and a home should have of all the decor in a Jewish home. I [snorts] was on the headlines a couple months ago, month ago, there was a whole conversation about um technology and taking a break and the distraction of it and there was a conversation about the fact that we have so much that's online today including the sitter and that's what people look at should they be looking at it during ding and elsewhere and I said you know one of the one of the I think negative unintended consequences of having so much Torah that is even and websites that are online and in our hands is that people no longer have bookcases in their homes. and the Jewish decor. When you walk into a Jewish home, the sign, the signal that you're in a Jewish home, in addition to the muza on the door, which I'll tell you about our giveaway in a moment for today, but in addition to the muza on the door should be the bookcase that you encounter when you come into the home. What makes this a Jewish home? We are the people of >> the potato cougle. No. >> Yes, also. Yes, also you should smell the potato cookle in a Jewish home and you should see the perfect potato cookle in the Jewish home. But we're not the people of the potato cook. We are the people of the book. And that bookcase is the Jewish decor in a Jewish home. And if you want, I'll give you a list of suggestions of what should fill that bookcase. What are the core books every Jewish home have to have from ash and a to a set of shas maybe aura the incredible library in English and all languages that we could have today. You got to hold books and wear books through and look at books. And even if you don't open it up, and even if you're learning online and in other ways, that's the decor of a Jewish home. That's the most magnificent. That is the most beautiful. That is the holiest. That is the highest. And that signals who we are. That's our decor. The books in a Jewish home, that's the decor of who we are. So don't forget, don't forget the greatest safer is the sitter. It's a safer. Mark it up. Underline, highlight. If there's a phrase, there's an expression that jumps out at you that's calling you. We mentioned today until I taught that when we were up to that init fairly early on because that comes in the in the I don't think I even noticed that line before. You just mumble it. You say it while you're peeling the crust from your eyes. You're still waking up. Sorry for that image. But you're you're mumbling those words, but then you hit those words and you go, "Those words are magnificent. Ash is wow. I want to live a life that I can hear the mitzvah singing and calling to me. I want to live a life that if someone needs something, I don't turn the other way or hide under the table or pretend I didn't hear it. They're calling me. That mitzvah is calling my name. The mitzvah of is calling my name. That mitzvah of making a meal for a new mother or somebody singing sha is calling my name. That mitzvah, we need people for hospitality. That invitation to participate in the global campaign. Somebody texted me or I listened or I saw there's a a poster behind me. That's calling my name. How could I ignore what's calling me? limits. So if that expression or phrase now means something, take out your pen, take out your highlighter and underline and write because the sitter is a safer and it's meant to be worked through. It's meant to be engaged. It's meant to be underlined. back inside page we're talking about. It's counterintuitive and it sounds paradoxical, but when we're struggling, when we're buffering, when we don't have high-speed connection in our amuna to Hashem, daven. Ah, but I'm ding to the person who I'm not even sure exists. I'm ding to the person. I'm ding to davin better when I'm struggling to davin. That makes no sense at all. Exactly. And do it anyway. Because that's what it's all about. It's about the relationship. It's about the connection. to hem. There was a mitzvah that puts ones. We just read, we just read um about how the man miraculously fell. Jewish people were in the desert. They were hungry. Hungry? We're tired. Are we almost there yet? Nothing's changed. And Hashem rewarded us with the incredible mun. We just spoke about this. How many people had shalas this past week? Anybody tap into Ravid? What am I even doing here? A total failure. Shalashus ladies don't lose out and that is an opportunity to remind you that this shabasone synagogue we have twice a year a BRS women's unity shalash rabbit and casor is speaking it's going to be beautiful right here actually in this holy room based kinesis have generously agreed to hold their shashidas elsewhere women can privacely sit here and sing and hear from rebbit and casora and rabbit gober will be there as well and you don't want to miss it it's always very inspiring ravi the holiest time of the week with the is called the of Shabas. This is the what are you going to be doing? I mean, how many how many family first could you read? How much can you sit on the couch reading by time? Enough already. I'm not knocking it, but enough for it. Did you read's article a couple weeks ago? You got Okay. How much reading on the couch can you do? Get up, sit up, and shaven. So this week in particular, huge thank you to Jessica Weiss and her amazing committee. We're putting it together and everybody is invited. Why? And are women obligated? Yes. They also benefited from the miracle of the falling of the mun. So that man that fell, it was a miracle. It fell from heaven. It's no more a miracle than when the bread grows from the ground, when the wheat grows from the ground. The only difference between the two is what? Expectation. We expect wheat to grow from the ground. We don't expect bread to fall from the heavens, but they're equally miraculous. We're not necessarily entitled to deserving of either. And when Hashem makes both happen, they're both a miracle. What a miracle. It's an incredible miracle. It's an incredible miracle. So we were meant to memorialize and hold on and capture literally this miracle because the tells us take a measure of this man, put it in a jar, put it in a container, it went in the in the holy ark that sat in the keshadash in the holy of holies so that the Jewish people when necessary could always pull it out, look at it and remember nostalgically. Hashem takes care of us. Just like the man fell from heaven, Hashem made it rain for my ancestors. He makes it rain for me. He takes care of me. He sustains me. The envelope I thought I lost in the pocketbook fell out exactly the day it was meant to so I could donate exactly where it's supposed to go [cough] [clears throat] for that letter. That person who posted on our global campaign, that person who posted on our global campaign. So that's the mum that that envelope fell from heaven. I guess it fell to me to us from heaven. Every morning the was left in the field would disintegrate. So that day that day's man that wasn't collected had already spoiled. So when Hashem told Aaron, "Collect man, put it in a container, save it and preserve it, put it in the he would have to wait till tomorrow till the new portion of man fell so that he could save it. says that Aron knew he prophetically knew that God was destined to ask him save and preserve a portion of mun. So every day he would take his portion of mun and he would save it and he would only eat it at night because maybe that would be the day that Hashem would command him. So he didn't have to wait till the next day for new month to fell fall. He was ready from that day's month because he saved it. Maybe that will be the day that Hashem asks him. What you see from here this is the idea that we have a chuka. What's a chuka? A chuka is a longing, a craving, a desire, a yearning, a yearning. You ever have a yearning for ice cream? >> You ever have a craving? Like right now, >> I want a hot dog. I haven't had a hot dog in I don't know how long, but I smell or I saw I want a hot dog. I just have this craving. I'm distracted. It's all I could think about. I have this appetite. I have this craving. I got to find a hot dog. All the trimmings, all the toppings. I need a hot dog. That's my ch that's my year. It's my craving. It's this cra. Don't talk to me about anything else. I can't concentrate on anything else. I have a craving and I've got to fulfill that craving. Holy people, they have craving for mitzvah. They have craving for opportunity. I just can't wait for I just can't wait for the amunir. I just can't wait for opportunity to make a meal for somebody who needs I just can't wait for that. I just can't wait. I can't wait for that shir that learn. I just can't wait. Iron A had this chuka. He was hungry and he wanted the mun could taste like anything you wanted. So whatever your craving was, ice cream or hot dog, it could taste like anything you want. Did you make a braha on it? Did you have to wait if it was fleshik? It's a lot of very interesting questions. Did you have to take on it if you wanted to taste like kala? How ex exactly did this man work? Very interesting. Could could you imagine it tasting like basal? Did it have to be kosher? Could it taste like bacon? Interesting questions about the mun. discussed it several years ago in the parashir from uter plus but in any case the monk could taste like anything he wanted but that wasn't his craving his craving was I just want it I'm waiting any minute now is going to ask me to save it and I'll be able to fulfill that mitzvah and that's my craving that's my yearning that's my wish that's my want that's what I want that's what I want next page The whole mitzvah only came to him because he was yearning, craving, wanting, wishing, longing, waiting. What's our zone? It's what we spoke about last week. What's the rats? Rats. The root of the word rats on will, want is r to run. Because what we run to reveals what we want, not what we want to want. the gym that maybe you joined on January 1st with the rest of the world. Do you want to go to the gym? Do you want to go to the gym? It's a very simple answer to that question. If I call the gym and I ask them to let me know how many times you've been there, I'll know whether you really want to go to the gym. And if you haven't been to the gym or haven't been to the gym often since you joined the gym, then you don't really want to go to the gym. What you want is you want to want. You want to want to go to the gym, but you don't want to go to the gym. How do you know the difference between what you want to want and what you want? It's a very simple answer by what you do. I've told you the story before about the great Reb who was walking with his when all of a sudden it started to rain and the Reb stopped and he paused while walking and he turned to his and he said, "How do you know the sky wants to rain?" It looked like okay he said because it's raining and with that he continued to walk and in these stories there's always that bold brazen who later asked the rebba rebes respectfully what in the world did that mean and the rebba said how do you know what you want to do based on what you're doing and if you're not doing it you don't really want to do it you want to want to do it how do you know the sky wants to rain because it's raining because it's raining that's how you know so in our own lives that first step of honesty is really important to know the difference between what we want to want and what we want and do we want to live with amuna and because the measure is are we living with it do we hear the mitzvah calling our name is our antenna extended to pick up the signal to the hugs the winks the ns from hashem are we setting aside to communicate time to communicate you can't really have a relationship if you don't communicate not a marriage not parent and child not friends and in work we're learning as we're implementing EOS the critical importance of communication and leading and managing and with the shalom you're not in a relationship if you're not communicating and communicating is two-way we talk to him through dabbing he talks to us through Torah and he talks to us through his magnificent world and the messages that are in it the seeming coincidences and chance and the way things work out for good and for bad and in cases where the story hasn't ended yet. So do we want to really live that way? What's our rut zone? That's is our zone his are we running to the things he wants us to run to when Hashem saw how much iron wanted it. That's when he gave it to us. When does Hashem meet us halfway? When he sees us running there, that's when he helps us. That's when he helps us. But if we're walking, if it's a spat, if we're not even moving, if we're lying on the couch, if we can't get up and begin, then we don't really want it. If we don't want it, he doesn't meet us halfway. Who follows our rut zone? And that's really the first gut check is what's our rut zone? Who do you want to be? Six months out, a year out, three years out, five years out. What do you want to look like? Who is the future version of you? What's your rat at every week? I mentioned in in that time of this is the time close our eyes and get lost in song and try to calibrate what's my ratson for this week. This is a week I got to work on being a better father. I've got to find that time. This is a week that my marriage needs some nourishment, reinforcement. We're going to make that time. This is a week I got to get back to that kaboker. I got to get back to that. I got to get back to that. I gotta get back to calling those friends, checking in on those people, volunteering for that. I gotta get back to I my sleep has been way off and I'm killing my future self. I need to sleep more and I need to sleep better. Every week at that time of what does it mean to be a rat? It's a time to examine and evaluate what's my rat. What's my will? What's my want? Not what's my want to want. What's my want? Not what do I want to want. What do I really want? What am I really gonna run after? What am I really running towards? What will Hashem help me and meet me halfway? Because he sees me doing my part and my running. That's what that time of the week is dedicated to. That's what it's really for. That's what it's really all about. When we show our he talks to us, he hugs us. He winks at us. He nods to us. He gives us those opportunities. He elevates us. He empowers us. He helps us. But that's really what it's about. What's our What are we running to? What do we want? I'll leave you with in the article I put up last night, I mentioned. I really believe this. If you want to know what somebody's all about, don't listen to the words that they say. Because so much of that is lip service and hot air. If you want to know what someone values, don't listen to what they say. Look at their credit card and bank statement. Look how they spend their money. If you want to know what someone values, just look at how they spend their money, what they invest in, what they spend on. If a person's credit card statement says, let's see, Netflix, Hulu, I don't even know what these are all called. Tell me more streaming services. Paramount, Disney Plus, you know, every streaming service every month. And there's no BRS Global on your credit card statement. You're all laughing. I want you to know I'll tell you this is emotional for me. I'm not laughing. If you value Mickey and Disney and Pyramid and NBC Sports and Hulu and Netflix, for that, you're willing to pay for all that entertainment and distraction. You're willing to pay. But living with Amuna, you're only willing to write an email changed your life. But your credit card statement doesn't show that you're willing to partner to change other lives. Then don't tell me how much you value it. I'm not talking about Global. I'm talking about Hatalah, the Mikvah, Avash, the Kell, your children's school. I'm forget Global because I don't want to make this about me. Beonline.org/global, but forget [laughter] forget the global campaign. I'm talking about whatever it is that you've benefited from. If you value, if it added value to your life, the things that added value to your life and that you claim you value, does your bank statement show that you value it? It's a pretty simple question. It's a pretty straightforward formula. What do you claim has added value to you? What do you claim you value? And does your bank statement reflect that you value it? And the other mirror to hold up, not just the words that are on our lips, not just the empty hot air, but the real way to know is your calendar. You claim to value that time, that exercise, that activity. Does your calendar show you do it? It's very simple. It's very straightforward. Bank statement and your calendar tell you everything about who you are. Not the words you say. The words you say are easy. Words we say are what we want to want. The words we say are what we want to want. But our calendar and our bank statement, now you need both because your bank statement may show that you belong to the gym. Your bank statement may show that you're still paying for the palat, but only your calendar will tell you whether you ever get on it. So, it's the combination of the two that reveal what not we want to want, but what we really want. And do we really want do we really want to live with Hashem and feel him in our lives? Are we really invested in the activities which will reinforce and help get us there? I thank all of you for learning together. I thank all those who wrote it even we can't get to and the giveaway. We'll end with this and then we'll take questions after we turn the stream off. A few weeks ago, someone sent in this movement to put a sticker under the muza and when you touch or kiss the muza the gum only talks about in the Rambam touching it's a later people have to kiss it. There were actually chumas that written during Corona. Should you kiss the muzza during Corona? But the MA gets to touch the muzza. notice it. When we walk in, when we walk out of a Jewish home, out of a room, we give it more meaning. We're more mindful when we remember the values about that space and the muza reminds us. So, someone started a campaign, say, "I love you, Hashem." A little sticker under the muza. When you touch it, when you remember, I love you, Hashem. I love you for the gift of what's in this room, who's in this room, what happened in this room, I'm leaving this room, coming into this room. So, then people started sending in, if you remember, pictures of this under. And then one woman sent in that she thought it was a beautiful idea and wanted to have it. and she volunteers at the pinetion for soldiers and she was going through papers to throw away and she found a whole stack of I love you for muzz then you remember all this >> anyway last night I was at a schloam that Richard Erick made for his mother shalom and they had an entire bowl of these and I said to Julie we're learning about this and living with amuna that's amazing if you have any leftover she said what do you mean I represent the person who's putting them out we'll make a stand at the sh we'll give them out here's a whole bunch giving out living with amuna So when we're done, feel free to take if you're going to put it underneath your muza in your home room, whichever one you want, all one. And uh remember, say I love you, Hashem, after underneath. Thank you to Julie and thank you to whoever donated them. We'll now take questions and answers for those who are live in person. And to those watching online, stay happy, stay healthy, and stay holy.