The TORAH'S cure for ANXIETY | Parsha Perspectives | Vayeitzei 5786

Good morning Boker. Welcome back to para perspectives. For today we have the privilege of learning together para's vet and extracting and applying all of its lessons for our lives. I want to thank our generous series sponsors Becky and Aviatan family in loving memory of Becky's father David Gman are learning David and Manish. This morning is also sponsored by Lester and Judy Henner in memory of his father and Henneritzky and Aliyah. Thank you to the Hannah for the generosity by Charles Libby in memory of his parents Shirley and Nathan who enjoyed 72 years of marriage as well by Alana and Alikon in appreciation of the Pares in honor of their sons Zev Ary and Mosha. May they continue to love and enjoy and set aside time for learning Torah. We are on page 144 in the arts girl stone and we continue to follow the narrative that is unfolding in front of us. Yakov, the Ishtam Yoshim. Yakov, who was depicted early on as a meek and passive, somewhat weak yeshiva Bakr has somehow managed, he's managed to uh dress the part, go undercover, work for the MSAD and the Shabbach and the IDF and do what was necessary in order to take the braha. But it cost him. He's now fleeing. He's in a witness protection program leaving home because his brother who continues to be the archeneemy of our people as wants to kill him which takes us up to the beginning of our para vet left and he headed towards he went to and we've studied in the past I'm really going to try to get towards more the second half of the para because so many times we've covered the beginning of the para why do we need to be told where he left all that matters is where he's going if he's going somewhere he obviously left somewhere else tells us that when a saddic leaves a city it leaves Rosham and that is a challenge for each of us to ask ourselves would it be noticeable and discernable if we left or disappeared would anyone notice would anyone care do we have such an impact do we play such a role are we contributing in such a way that if we left if we disappear feared anyone would notice and if not maybe it's time to rethink what we do because Jacob leaves and nevertheless it leaves a significant he encounters the place is one of the names of God and he sleeps there and he takes from the stones he puts them under his head these stones inimate objects somehow are competing each one says that sadic the righteous one should rest his head on mem combines all the stones this is somewhat of a illusion to the 12 tribes, these 12 stones that are going to come out of Yakov, even though they are distinct and different. Nevertheless, there is a unity and integration among them. And so too, this is the notion of the 12 ch sons, the children of Yakov. We have differences, but we are united in our relationship with and service of Hashem. We all know the beginning of the para. He has a dream. He has a dream. And the ladder is really starting on the earth and the top of the ladder reaches the heavens. And there are angels of God. They're going up and they're coming down. And again, we've covered all this in the past. Rashi's bothered famously. Why are the angels going up and coming down? Angels should start where? In heaven. They should come down and then go up, not go up and then come down. Rashi references and we've spoken about in the past this famous dream and God is standing over it and he says introduce I'm God the Lord of your father the land that you are sleeping on good news it's going to be yours prime real estate the world will be obsessed and focused on it and it's all yours and you will be like so you will spread in every direction and all the families of the earth will bless themselves through you or by you and I will be with you and I will protect you. He has this incredible dream. This dream has all the elements of everything you could want. I'm going to bless you with riches and real estate. I'm going to be with you wherever you go. You have nothing to worry about. The world will admire you and indeed invoke your name in offering blessings, want to attach themselves and associate themselves to you. And so Jacob wakes up and he says, "Well, God is in this place. I had no idea. I had no idea. I'm tempted to dive back into it again. We've covered it from many directions. You can listen to previous and past shurim. what this dream means. What did he think before the dream? What did the dream change that he has this other conclusion? Why did he feel Hashem wasn't with him in that place and now he does see Hashem in that place? What role does this latter have bridging heaven and earth? Hashem is not only found in the base med in the sh he's found even on the ground and in this earth he's found in the seemingly mundane activities of every day wherever we go whatever we do. In fact, in our Amuna Shir, we made up a uh sticker for the back of your phone and a tag for your luggage and a magnet for your car. And it all says with a lot of gratitude to our friend Alana Lando, "Embrace your place. You're exactly where you're meant to be. Wherever you are, sometimes the Jew feels stuck. We're never stuck. Sometimes we feel delayed. We're never delayed. Sometimes we feel displaced and we're never displaced. Wherever we are, we should make an effort. If there's someplace else we want and intend and mean to be, make the effort to be there. But once we do, once we take our initiative, surrender, submit, and accept that a Jew is wherever they're meant to be. Too many people think, you know, where Hashem is. If I got to sit in shul all day, if I could sit in, if I could sit and learn in Kal, if I could be in the Bish, I'd be a religious personality. Hashem is there. The answer is no. Yes, haz wherever you are. In Yakov's case, on the run, a refugee fleeing for his life, sleeping on the ground, an outdoorsman combining rocks and stones under his head in order to be able to get a Jacob is the originator of the sticker. Yakov didn't need the magnet or the luggage tag. He knew wherever I am, that's what he drew. That's what he concluded. of Arta Rosho Maga Hashima I don't remember if I ever told you but I dated very few girls but Hashem before Hashem introduced me to my Basher but in between while dating her there was a a break not my choice and for another time she stepped out so I could tell the story and in the interim somebody wanted to set me up with a girl who had just come back from seminary so I was concerned I had already been back a little while this girl straight back from se like right off the plane right back from seminary. I was a little concerned, a little intense, a little. And the shaken who tried to set me up, I'll never forget, she said, "You have nothing to worry about." It's true. She's intense. She's on fire. She just got off the plane, but she's her feet are firmly planted here on earth. even if her head is still up in the clouds. Even if even if in any case she was a friend of y so I agreed to go out with her and soon after and I got back together and it's all happily ever after. So, and I'm hoping she's not listening to the par right now tells us we've studied in the past exactly where was Jacob. He has this dream of this ladder. Where is he originating and where does the latter extend to? What's happening? give us some geographical context here and it's a big makus. It's a debate among the early commentary. So for today, Rashi Rashi says the foot of the ladder is in Beerva. The tap of the ladder is in Betel. In fact, if you visited Betel and I highly encourage you to, you will see an enormous sign at the entrance of Betel today that says here is the place that Yakov had his dream. Betel because cities in Israel are not just cities. They are landmarks of the Torah of what happened there? To whom, when, why, what. So Betel, this is where Yakov is dream. The foot of the ladder beva the top and Bel and the middle of the slope is opposite where temple mount on where the B mikdash will stand soon. In his safer tambas explains the latter represents our effort to bridge heaven and earth. Muts of the latter is rooted on the ground or the mitzvah that we do in this world. Reaching up to the heavens represents Hashem receiving and accepting our efforts. So down here we dav we do a mitzvah we make a we do a those are our efforts of down here on earth. But it's what we do down here. It matters. It shifts the cosmos. It makes it to the heavens. It stretches over the keshakadashim, the window through which our prayers go up to heaven. We create angels with each and every one of our good deeds. And though angels we create with every correct and right and good and just choice that we make, the angels that we give birth to, that we create, they climb up that ladder. And when we make mistakes, we fall short. The angels come down a rung or two. He describes beautifully in his beautiful image and this is what Jacob understood that virtue and merit are not only relegated to the shul the bish but a Jew wherever they are when you're kind and courteous at the supermarket at the gym when you're honest and have integrity at work and in business when we carry ourselves in the principles and values val and live a lifestyle of Torah, then we create angels each time. And with each of the interactions, they climb that ladder and they bring it, they deliver it right to the to Shamima. They bring it right to the throne of the Almighty. What an incredible image. But we also need to know the inverse is true. That when we make a mistake, when we come up short, when we indulge our base instinct, our lower or lesser self, that an angel came down a couple rungs and didn't make it all the way to the top and didn't deliver to the heavens. This is the image that portrays, very powerful, very beautiful, but he takes it a step further. And he adds an insight that despite having read the para so many times, until you see it, it may not jump out at you. And he says the following. He says the following. This one word in this rashi should jump out. Rashi says shipu the middle of its shipua reaches. What does shipua mean? Shipua means slope. Correct. It means slope. It means slope. A ladder never stands straight up. Why does a ladder never stand straight up? What would happen to that ladder? >> It would tip over. It would fall. You know, I came this morning and I saw on top of Bar Hashem, the walls are going up. It's incredible. It's exciting. It's amazing. And I saw on top of one of the enormous walls that's up. I saw one of the construction workers sitting on top of the wall. So, I quickly took a picture and sent it to our committee to say, "Are we sure we have insurance?" I didn't see him tied or connected to anything. He was just sitting on top of that wall. I was going to give him a violin. It'd be a great picture. Fiddler on the roof of the new shoo. So, so I was worried, God forbid he'd fall off. If a ladder was standing entirely upright, not on any angle at all, it would tip over. It would fall. A ladder needs to stand needs to stand on an angle. When one is standing on the ladder, resting on a rung, are you higher or lower than others on the ladder? If a ladder stood upright, then yes. If you looked up and someone was on a rung above you, you're below them. If you look down and someone's on a rung uh you're above others, you're above them. But when a ladder's on an angle, says when the ladders on an angle, so wherever you are, whatever rung you are, if you look up, nobody's above you. And if you look down, nobody's below you. Because the way the ladder works, if it represents our climb, if it represents our place, if it represents our journey towards Hashem, towards our best selves, then we don't live in contrast or comparison to others. The rung represents advancement and direction. Nobody is in fact higher than another. Nobody has more or less access to or connection with the heavens or Hashem. All of us look up and see the heavens and all of us look down and see the earth. When a ladder is on an angle, whatever rung you are on, nobody is above and nobody is below. Each of us says, the Torah is telling us is on our own rung. We're on our own climb. Looking in front or behind will only distract and only divert from our personal ambition and from pursuing our unique mission and our purpose. You know, too many people are consumed with competing and comparing and contrasting to others. But they have that title. They make that much money. They have this jewelry. They wear that car. They have this many children who are married. They have that car in their driveway of this house. They came back from that vacation. They know this many mas the is that long. The biggest obstacle to our climb is thinking there are people on top of us. Or the other biggest obstacle to our climb is the pride that comes in thinking there are people below us, beneath us. And Hashem says, "I don't really care what rung you're on. I care which direction you're going. Where did you start? Someone can be on a ladder towards the top, but maybe they were born an even higher rung and they're on their way down. Somebody could be on a rung towards the bottom, but maybe they were born at the very foot and they're already climbing up. What matters is not what rung you're on. What matters is which direction you're going. Because this ladder says she this ladder is on an angle. It's not upright. Nobody is higher or lower than anyone else. When a ladder is on an angle, everyone looks up and sees the heavens, no one above them. Everyone looks down and sees the earth. No one is beneath them. No one is below them. We should not compete and compare. One of the reasons that social media is having such a a deterious effect on mental health of young people, but really all people, is because it lends itself, it was designed to get us to compete and compare our lives to those that we see carefully curated online that by the way bear no resemblance to the actual lives of the people who are posting. People post their best moment, photoshopped the three seconds on the two-eek vacation. Everyone got along. The moment at dinner where they were smiling over the dessert. They picture, they post the picture when everything was wonderful. Carefully curated, which is an illusion and a mirage and often usually bears little resemblance. So many influencers will tell you how their lives are falling apart or breaking down offline, relationships imploding. As long as it's carefully curated and posted online and that's creating an environment where people are competing and comparing, it's a ladder they're looking down or they're feeling with arrogance and pride that they're all the way on the top. The Torah comes and tells us, "Shipuo, our ladder's on an angle. It's not upright. You don't climb a corporate ladder in an effort to pass others by. We're each on our own climb. We're each on our own journey for all of us. When we look up, nobody's above us. And when we look down, nobody's beneath us. Says that's the message of bridging heaven and earth. That's the journey of a Jew from Muts of Ar to Rosha. President Teddy Roosevelt said it well when he said, "Comparison is the thief of joy." Comparison is the thief of joy. They could have so much happiness in our lives if we simply stopped competing and comparing to others. If we stopped looking at the latter where we are relative to others. Turning the page. We're moving along. I told you wakes up and he declares the name of the place and Jacob takes an oath. Jacob makes a promise saying if God indeed will be with me and he will guard me on this path that I'm going and he gives me bread to eat and clothing to wear and I successfully can come home again. Jacob's on the run. He's fleeing. His brother wants to kill him. So he makes a deal with the Almighty. He's wheeling and dealing. Yakov, Yakov, the meek, passive, quiet, pale is Yosh Yeshiva Bakr, whose nose is always in the Gmorrah all of a sudden is a dealmaker. He's a rain maker. He's wheeling and dealing. He's making deals with the Almighty. Tell you what, God, that was a good dream. It's a nice dream. I feel good about it. You gave me a lot of promises, a lot of blessing, beautiful future. I I feel pretty good about it, but let's make a deal. I want to make a promise. I take an oath. Here's a deal. Give me clothing to wear. Give me food to eat. Return me to my family home in peace. And then you'll be my God. You'll be my God. And this stone will be the monument to capture this moment, this covenant. And if indeed you fulfill your promise and you give me that wealth and riches of everything you give me, I'll give I will tithe. I will give a tenth. And Jacob heads out on his way. What kind of a deal is this with God? It seems like the biggest you ever read in the entire Jacob goes to sleep. He's on the run for his life. He has a dream. And in the dream, what did Hashem say? I know you're nervous. Yanko. Yanka, I know you're nervous, but they have nothing to worry about. Don't be a worrier. Be a worrier because I'm gonna be right by your side. I'm with you the entire way. The whole world's going to admire you. They're going to bless their children invoking your name. You're going to have real estate and wealth where you're sleeping. It's yours and I'm going to return you. I'm going to return you to this land and I'll never abandon you and I'll be with you. And Yaka wakes up and he says, "Okay, it's a good start, but let's let's talk tacas. Let's talk. I want a contract. I want to see it in writing. I want a ne. I'm making a nether. I'm making a oath. When will you be my god? Clothing to wear, food to eat, bring me home safely. What in the world is going on here? What kind of a nether? What is happening in this time? So there is an essay. There used to be a journal Rabbi Mosh Sepski who was the Resashiv or Shalim was the general editor of a wonderful journal that was put out years ago by the U called Jewish thought. Anyone ever hear of it or read it? I don't even know if you could find it online, but I collected them when they came out. This beautiful articles in Makava and Tanakh by uh wonderful authors. They stopped it a long time ago. If you have any pull influence every time Rabbi Seeki visit visited our community I would encourage him and put it out again. So there was an article by Nakman Lavine called bread to eat clothes to wear the symbols of Yakov's trials and it's a long essay. I'm not going to tell you but I will just point to the thesis of it because it's excellent. He writes YaKob's anxieties about bread and clothes are understandable. Having just taken food and precious clothes in order to usurp as braha, Jacob feared that measure for measure broad clothes would elude him. And indeed they did. Despite Hashem's promise, YaKob had a good reason to worry. And why did Jacob have a good reason to worry? Because how does Hashem act interact with us? Mida mida. Measure for measure. So why was Yakov specifically nervous? I'm gonna have a problem. I misused clothing and therefore I may struggle with clothing. And I misused food and therefore I and my descendants may struggle with food. Why would Yakov fear that? Because what did Yakov just do? Where is he coming from? Albeit with a 14-year collal interruption at Yeshiva Shame that I'm sure began with one year and turned into 14. But anyway, where was he just coming from having taken the brahas from his brother Asov? And how did he take the brahas from his brother Asov? Because Yitzk or Rifka rather instructed him, go kill an animal and go put on its fur and go disguise yourself and wear the clothing of your brother and go slaughter and go cook and barbecue a meal for your father. Because YithK didn't eat tail like a real Yid. He ate flesh. He had a barbecue. He ate good meat. And that's what will make him happy. So Yakov's pursuit of food and clothing revolves around these issues. And his children experience the same. Just think about it for a moment. This is what he develops in this essay. Where do clothing then play a role and haunt Yakov the rest of his life? What happens with Yakov's sons? Yakov gives a gift to one son. What's that gift? >> It wasn't a Game Boy. He didn't give him an iPhone, AirPods. What was the gift he gave him? >> An article of clothing, a coat of many colors. And it led to what we know. So, Yakov and clothing. They were problematic. It all began when he used clothing for deception. And then he's nervous and he makes a deal with Hashem. Don't take away meid. And now I'm really worried. Continue to clothe me and my progeny. And then with his own children, he has this issue with clothing. They strip Yoseph of his clothes. They throw him in the pit. They slaughter a kid of goats and they take the the blood. They go back. What does Ruvane do when he goes back to the pit and there's no Yoseph? What does he tear? His clothing. And then they go back and tell Yakov, Yoseph, we lost Yoseph. And what does Yakov do? He tears his clothing. And so again, he develops this in this essay. There's a reason that Yakov is concerned and makes a Neder Davka specifically about clothing and food because when you track and trace Yakov's life, you will see the significance and centrality the role of clothing. Even even among other children of Yakov, Yehuda, what happens with Yehuda? Yehuda and Tamar. What does Tamar present? She says, "Whoever owns these items is the father of the baby I'm carrying." What are those items? Was a ring, but it was also clothing. It was clothing. Through this trickery, Tamar bore parrots and Zerak, who like Jacob and Asov are twins. He has a beautiful, beautiful essay here. Potifar. What does what does Yoseph leave behind when he's in Egypt? As Potifar grabs his his garment and he runs out without it. all the clothing. I didn't even tell you them all, but there are many, many references, the rule, the centrality. There's a good reason that Yakov was worried about clothing. Things come full circle. They come full circle. And later, Yoseph falsely accuses his brothers of stealing and punishing them by enslaving Bin Yamim. And what do they do? They tear their clothing. And they cause their father to tear his clothing. When they go back and they say, "We're in trouble. We had to leave another brother down in Egypt. And then when Yoseph reveals himself, what does he give as a gift? What's the free giveaway? An art scroll iPad. Mama also. But what's the giveaway? What did he give? He gave them all. Each one changes of garments. And to beam, he gave five changes of garments. Clothing over and over and over. You may have never noticed it, but now you can't help but see it everywhere in the rest of Sephora. Clothing and Yakov and Yakov's sons are everywhere in both directions. Tearing clothing, leaving clothing behind, and then the gift of clothing. And the same is true about food. Yakov tried to feed his children and there were problems. What's Yoseph's dream about his brothers? The sun, the moon, the stars, global power through food. There's a famine and they have to go down to Egypt. And who will be the one who owns and controls and can give out the food? It's Yoseph. That's what causes the enmity, the animosity, this dream. They sold him to food merchants and who in turn sold him to Potif's minister of chefs. Yseph controls everything with one exception. He left everything he had in Yoseph's hand, says the Torah except for the bread that he ate that Potifar did not give to Yseph. And then we have the sim mashkim again references to food over and over and over again. Yoseph's family reunion. They go down to get food. He sends them back with food. He makes them an accusation about a goblet of food. Slavery is on their mind. He reveals himself and what does he do? He indulges in food. He breaks bread. And Jacob and his sons finally had bread to eat and clothing to wear. They were not destined to return to build Hashem's house, but they established a house dedicated to the service of Hashem in Egypt. So in this beautiful essay, I highly encourage you to get your hands on it and read it. He talks about this nether of Jacob is not because he has doubt in Hashem. In whom does he have doubt in himself. He's worried. I used clothing and food for deception and trickery and now I'm worried I'm going to be in trouble. And therefore he makes a deal with Hashem. Don't punish my offspring. Don't punish my progeny because I tricked. I was deceptive using clothing and food. So therefore, he makes this nead and indeed clothing and food play the big role. But when the curtain comes down at the end of the brothers are breaking bread together and they're giving gifts of clothing to one another and the nether that Yakov makes is fulfilled. It's a beautiful essay and a beautiful insight and I encourage you to read it in his new beautiful essays again all throughout our para but here specifically he writes more the tells us lay with what does the word laymore mean saying well vidor means he vowed why do you have to repeat vow Saying just vow. Why do you have to use the word saying? Says the medish. Yakov here was a precedent. Yakov here gave us license. Yakov here teaches us when we are in Sorakov. If God forbid we find ourselves as we have these last two years in a time of crisis for the children of Yakov, what should we do? Make a make a vow, a promise. Cut a deal with the Almighty. What right, what license, what precedent do we have to make a deal with God? We point to Yakov leos was for generations that we too whether individually or whether collectively we too the can says it doesn't say when it's time for in his life and in his problems to make A vow, an oath, a promise to Hashem. Whom does he attribute it to? Hang his hat on? None other than Yakov. Yakov. Because Yakov made this nether. Yakov made this nether. And Rashi there on the says, "Anyone who makes a nether should invoke and associate it with the nether of Jacob." the nether of Jacob. We see we have this capacity. Now why did make this he then continues? When does Jacob make this? What precipitates to make the what he's worried about is I'm leaving the cocoon. I'm leaving the nest. I'm leaving the safe space of the B medish and I have to go out into the world. It's time for an education. It's time for a profession. It's time to build a family. It's time to navigate the world. And he's worried. God forbid he will violate the three of course strictest sins in the old of Torah. He's confident he'll be okay. But now out there in the world, he's worried. And where do you see this? of a nether is the word means to live to dwell where did go to dwell in the letter nun what's nunal 7* 7 is 49 and the 50th gate is lala is above tea's word I'm going to give in to my tea I'm going to give in to my nature Natural impulse, instinct, drive, temptation. What's one above nature? Giving into nature. Seven is nature. 7* 7 is 49. I want to dwell and live in a place one above. One above. when we're worried that we can't find I don't see in the natural way of things in the way the world is unfolding naturally I don't see a way out how is this going to work how will it make sense how is it going to happen so when the situation feels helpless and hopeless when Israel is surrounded on seven sides seven countries attacking her when it feels helpless and hopeless hundreds of thousands of missiles from Hezbollah ballistic missiles from Iran kamas houthis Shamron they're terrorists at the United Nations as we heard about this past Shabas Hanor and UN watch in some of the halls of Conges of Congress from all over helpless and hopeless in the natural order how we'll get out that's when you make a nether that's why because nether is nun Hashem even when it seems naturally helpless and hopeless I dwell in the place of nun I dwell fell on the 50th floor. I don't My elevator doesn't stop at 49. My elevator, a Jew's elevator doesn't stop at the multiple of seven, the natural order. We go all the way to the 50th floor. We go to a place where we know you're capable of anything of miracles. By making a nund, you live on the 50th floor. You connect the 50th level to what is above nature, to the toem. It's a long essay. I wish I had time to go through the whole thing. I'm just giving you some tastes of it's amazing. He's amazing. Just some tastes. It's not a coincidence. I know we're only up to Kaneka, but let's skip forward to Pum H made a tree. How tall was it? Where did Ham make that that pole from? He took it from the boards of the ark that ultimately ended up on the mountains of Ararat. And the length of those boards were how long? 50 Amma. What in the world is this reference? Yak, Shimon, and Esther. Why was it 50 tall? And what was it taken from the ark the ta of Noah? What's going on here? So the kadesh writes that the number 50 is 47 * 7 is 49. 50 is one above the the flood came to destroy the world. Noah saved it with a ta that was 50. One more than nature. The natural order of the flood that destroyed nature. He survived by being in a that was 50, one above nature. Han calculated that he'll draw from that place the 50th if that's where the Jews go in a crisis. If that's where they dwell and live, if that's how they are so resilient that they have survived through the millennia, Hammon says, I got to go get something from the 50th floor to bring them down. That's why he goes and he takes specifically that like that's what it means to take a nether like Jacob did here. That is the path that we are following in his also has an insight on this. He asked a different question. Jacob's language seems superfluous. Jacob says give me bread to eat. give me clothing to wear. You're not eating the clothing or wearing the bread. It's obvious that you eat bread and wear clothing. So why not just cut a deal and say, "Hashem, give me clothing and bread." Why does have to elaborate? Give me bread to eat and clothing to wear. So the gash quotes say this wanted bread only to eat and not to leave over. Hashem, I'm not asking you for a net worth. I'm not asking you for retirement fund. I'm not asking you for storehouses. I'm not asking you for Costcoized portions. All I need is every day bread for that day. Like the gar says, a person who has bread for today yet worries what he will eat tomorrow is mikat amuna. If you have what you need for today, don't worry about tomorrow. If you worry about tomorrow, then you're mikat amuna. Jacob didn't want his food or any of his physical needs to occupy his mind aside from when he needed to engage them. Now, that doesn't mean we we believe in planning. You got to plan for your retirement. You got to save for your retirement. You've got to plan for the future. Torah is for planning. Mosha is about having life insurance. You've got to plan for the future. That is a very Jewish concept, but not to be plagued by or worried about or forfeiting the present for the future. You plan for the future and then you live in the present. So Jacob says, "I'm not worried about tomorrow as long as you give me what I need today." What I need today, there's a notation at the above Gomorrah referencing a says the says that I can test them whether they'll follow my teaching. What does that have to do with says the Gary Rashiva? This teaching of Kazal seems to contradict another gives a mush of a king. So the garba goes on and he says the following. The gar says only interest in his world is the four of spending 14 years immersed in the ara of Jacob had come to embody the very reason for the world's existence giving the lower world unprecedented prominence. The heavenly bdash was aligned to the more prominent Bikdash. Same is true. Rashi mentions this concept for the third time. Sorry, am I reading the right I'm not reading the right insight. I apologize. I'm reading the wrong insight. Back to the geriva for here. So again, why is it bread is obviously to eat and clothing is obviously to wear because Jacob only wants enough for that day. He's not lost in the future needing for the needing for the future says the Gashir. There's a fine line between appropriate concern and lack of faith. Although Ben is to be concerned the Mun wouldn't fall tomorrow, they weren't to fear they wouldn't have food. That would be an indication of poor faith. After all, who supported all mankind would support them. The concern was meant to inspire them to remember that everything is dependent only to Hashem so they would turn their hearts to him. That's what the med means. That's what it's all about. This connects also to last week's para when Jacob gets that from his father. What's the many have the custom to recite this long section on Shabas? By the way, a Jew doesn't do it alone. They say it alternating with somebody else because we wish and we want. We get in tandem cooperatively with others. Why [clears throat] does it begin with a So Rashi says Hashem gives and he goes back and he gives again. What kind of a is that? Allocate and give me everything I need in perpetuity forever. I don't want to have to go back over and over again because the ultimate is not a parent says here's my credit card unlimited limits a good I don't need to hear from you we don't need to speak you're good to go you have everything you need enjoy versus when the parent says enjoy here's a debit card I have a suspicion I'll hear from you before Shabas the evidence the parent loves loves the child is when the parent does not give the child everything they need in perpetuity because they want to hear from that child. They want a relationship with that child to live a life and YaKob received this bra from his father. I just need enough for today and tomorrow I'll ask you again for tomorrow and the next day I'll draw close to you again by asking you again then. Each day I have the blessing of feeling I need you. Each and every day of never feeling I've arrived. Of never leaning in to be too comfortable. So he flees. He's on his way. He goes to the well. He meets Rael. He takes this heavy stone off the top that the shepherds weren't able to do. He rebukes the shepherds. What are you doing? It's the middle of the day. Why are you retired? Why are you off from work? Get back to work. We've spoken in the past. I would think that they would smack him around. We just met you. Who are you to give us rebuke? How did Yakov get away with rebuking them? We spoke about them in the past. And he says to Ra, "No, where do you come from? You're connected to Lavan. Can you take me home? I got to meet Lavan." Raal takes Yakov home to Lavan. And Jacob falls in love with Raal. Leia, her eyes are Rakos. Raal is beautiful. Jacob loves Raal. He works for her for seven years. We're fast forwarding here. Page 150. Yakov contracts to marry and he's deceived. But he works seven more years for because he loves her. And what happens these seven years? The Torah tells us they pass by. How does art score translate? They seem to him a few days because of his love for her. They seem just a few days because of his love for her. Says for several we've been kept in suspense. After a month when loan asked Jacob what he would like his wages to be in return for the work he expects from him. The text makes clear what we suspected at the outset. Yakov has fallen in love with Rael. Yakov is following his eyes. not generally considered a good thing in Tanakha followed her eyes desiring the forbidden fruit seeing the sons of Isai among whom Hashem has told him is Israel's future king initially chose Eli Yav who looks the part he's told by Hashem he judged wrongly man looks at the outward appearance but Hashem looks at the heart and yet Jacob is deeply in love Torah tells us this is one of its most beautiful lines worked for Ra seven years but so great was his love for her that they seemed a few He is oblivious to both labor and time. Not before and not afterward do we find in the Torah such romantic passion. When you are in love, time doesn't take forever. Time flies by quickly. When the work that you're doing is towards the person that you're in love with, then time flies. When the work that you're doing is so that you can unite and connect with the person you love then indeed says Rabbi Saxs time flies. But I want to tell you Rabbi Dr. Abraham Jski has a commentary on parish Yadabad brought this down and he says the following applying from the recovery world. You know in the recovery world how do you get somebody who's hit rock bottom? How do you get somebody who's ready to make a change or transformation in their life? They're ready to understand that they can't help themselves. They have to submit to a higher power. That they can't uh get themselves out of their bind. That person who's addicted to gambling, alcohol, drugs, other behaviors and substances, how do they commit to a lifelong radical change in their lifestyle? You know, the rest of my life is a very hopefully a very long time. I'll never have a drink. I'll never have drugs. I'll never gamble. I'll never look at I'll never do the rest of life is a very long time and the recovery world one of the sayings is one day at a time one day at a time says Rabbi Tski that's yes Jacob looks at Ra and says seven years are you crazy that's not yeshivish to wait seven years to get married and I'm Yakov seven years seven months seven weeks seven weeks What do you mean seven years? It's forever. Seven years. How does Jacob do it? What's the root of the word? One day at a time. One day at a time. Every day I'm almost there. I'm almost there to marrying. Just one more day I have to work. And then after that it'll be one more day I have to work. And after that it'll be one more day I have to work. Just lay off the alcohol, the drugs. I don't know what will be forever. Just today, one more day. I'm not one more day. I'm not going to speak lashara. One more day. I'm going to wake up and make it to minion. One more day. I'm not going to r raise my voice or be impatient. One more day. One day at a time. One day at a time. It is a strategy and a method for anything meaningful in life. And says so beautifully. Maybe that's for Yakov. Seven years should feel like and is forever. So how does he make the time fly by? Because he thinks about them as how one day at a time. One day at a time. So he works his seven years and he thinks he's marrying whom? He's marrying. And he wakes up in the morning and who is it instead? He looks over and he says, "Whoa, Leia, what are you doing here? What's going on over here? What did you do to me? I worked for you pulled the old switcheroo. What happened over here? What happened over here says Rabbi Sax? What does the word reiss mean? >> Why'd you trick me? Where else did we see that word? >> Go back to When Jacob takes the bra from his father, what does the sayma is the same root, the same word points out, listen carefully to the text. The word Jacob uses with Lavanis is the very word used to describe Jacob's behavior and taking the word Lavan uses to describe the younger sibling is because what is the answer? Hey buddy, relax fall back. You know why I switched them out? Because we don't do that over here. We don't give the younger one before the older one. Again that word should be familiar points out Rabbi Saxs the word that appears in Rifka's oracle about Jacob and Asov sir the greater shall the younger serve sir even the sentence Lavan uses to justify the deception this is not done in our country to marry off the younger before the firstborn is deeply ironic does love know that this in effect is what YaKob once did in another place the irony may be unintentional may not know but we the readers ers do and so surely does Yakov himself. If these hints are signaling how the passage should be read, then the narrative is an example unparalleled in its drama of the single most fundamental moral axiom of the Torah. Mida mida measure for merit measure. Those who deceive will be deceived. So this is now the second time we've seen in our par first. Why does Jacob need to take a narr about clothing and food? Because mida he misused to use clothing and food to be deceptive. Now we have another midi. The very language the very words after Yakov suffers the deception are familiar because they're the exact same words that are used for the deception that Yakov himself had pulled. Muhammad H. Next page. Now he works, he marries, he marries, he works, and he marries bears him four sons. Yehuda, the fourth son is called Yehuda. Why? This time I thank God. She therefore called him Yehuda. And she thought she was done having children. We are called what's our name? The Jewish people. Yehudim. We are Yehudim. We are Jews. To be a Jew is to be a Yehudi. To be a Yehoud Yehudi. To be Yehudim. To be a Yid is to be grateful. We are a people of gratitude. It's amazing. Every year we read this para the week of Thanksgiving. that the country the country gives thanks for a day and we join the country in giving thanks for that day appreciation actually just published yesterday last Friday I had the privilege of uh offering an invocation at the America first policy institute in front of some high ranking members of the administration cabinet members and others I hesitated whether to do it I did it in the end and what I spoke about was that if America first America first has to mean knowing how America first came to be and if America first came to be from the values of the Jewish Bible. The declaration is filled with the language of the Jewish Bible of our Torah. It's founded on Jewish values. Jews are great patriots and Jews have every right to feel free and safe wearing a yarmaka wherever they go. I spoke very strongly and I published what I said. You can read it online. It's my uh my post for this week. So, we're proud and we participate in giving thanks. Maybe nobody more than the Jew because no country in the diaspora in our history has offered us greater protection, safety, security, greater freedom, and a greater ability to practice our religion. And with all that we're going through and all the challenges that we have and all the concerns for the future, including especially for New York, it's new mayor. We still have the greatest freedom and the greatest opportunity to live our religious lives in safety and security than in any other place and at any other time in our dispersion in the diaspora. So we join in that gratitude. But for a Jew, it's not one day of a year and it's not marked by eating turkey and having fantastic sales. For a Jew, it's each and every day. It is our name. We are Jews. Because every time we reference our Judaism, we should be filled with gratitude. That's who we are. That's how we wake up every day. What are the first words on our lips when we wake up in the morning? >> Modi. Even though grammatically it should be ani mod. I thank a Jew can't wake up with the word I. The first word that you say every morning can't be I. So we therefore bend the rules of grammar to instead of waking up with the word I. Ani we say it grammatically incorrectly imprecisely to begin mod ani grateful am I because what's the first word on the lip of a Jew wake up in the morning attitude of gratitude I wake up and say wah thank you so grateful ali I'm so grateful not just one Thursday a year each and every day of every year of my whole life begins with mod ani mod grateful am I it's in our very name so that we remember it that's what says tama tells us that until nobody thanked hashem till nobody thanked hashem what does that mean what does that mean and thanked hashem noahak thanked hashem yeshiva they didn't thank hem thanked hashem thanked yakov thanked is the first to thank hashem Sofur says everybody else thanked. Thank you was paying a debt of gratitude. You did something nice for me. I said thank you. And now we're even. Even Stephen. Now we call it even. Now we're even. Leia said no. This is a debt I can never pay. And so she names her son Yehuda. Why? Every time she calls his name, Yehuda, hurry up. You're going to miss the bus. Yehuda, did you do your homework? Yehuda, it's time for supper. Every time she says his name, she's saying hapam oas Hashem. Yehuda, thank you, Hashem, for this one. Yehuda, Yehuda, thank you, Hashem, for Yehuda. Every time she says his name, she's thanking again and again, over and over. not as a debt she discharged and now she's done but as a identity to be thankful over and over and over again and that says the Jewish people are called yehoudim we don't pay a debt of gratitude once but we are thankful over and over and over again says that she also calculated she had received more than her portion so now I have to be grateful Why did she think she had more than a portion? She was a pre She was a prophet. And she knew that YaKob was going to have how many children? 12. And YaKob had how many wives? Four. Two plus two. So 12 divided by four. Leia could do it. The math was three. This is her fourth son. She says, "Ah, I thought I'd only have three." That's the math. That's how it calculates. So now I had four one more than I deserved. Oess. I have to be grateful says nobody thanked. Why is Leia considered the first one who thanked Hashem? What do you mean recited that was not written by David? We have a tradition that goes all the way back to Adam said thanked. Countless others thanked. We have many others. So why are we saying Leia is the first? Each of the others thanked Hashem on for something they wanted to get. Aram thanked Hashem that he defeated the four kings. He was able to rescue. Leia Leia is incredibly pained by the fact that who does Jacob love more? She's in tremendous pain because All the names of the first three sons are to bind her, connect her, tie her to each of the first three names are Hashem, I'm suffering. Yakov doesn't love me. I'm a second wife, second fiddle. Hopefully, these children will bind me, connect me to him. when she sees it's not working. She's still not the primary wife, even though she had she had three sons, she all of a sudden shifts and pivots and realizes my mission and my purpose, my place in life is not to be Jacob's number one. What's my purpose and place in life? I have a different tapid. And Hashem is showing me that. And how did he show it? Because I got more than my portion. I got a fourth son. What's my role? My role is to be a mother. What she's thanking Hashem for is I've discovered my mission and my purpose. I've been fighting it. I've been resisting it. I've been trying to get you to change it, Hashem. But now I see it. I understand it. And I accept it. And for that, I say thank you. When I see and understand when I know my place in the world, I say thank you. I say thank you. We should learn something big. The idea of being happy with your Latin life we're all familiar with. Be happy with your Latin life. I like the latter. It doesn't compete or compare to somebody else's Latin life. So what? Be happy with your Latin life. Leia taught us don't only be happy with your Latin life. Be grateful. Be capable to express gratitude for your lot in life. Now it happens to be fast forward. Leia thinks, "All I ever wanted to be is Yakov's wife." Ra says, "All I ever want to be is a mother." Leia says, "My dream is unrealized and unfulfilled. I'll never be Yakov's number one." Ra says, "My dream is unfulfilled. Here I am still barren and longing." But look at the end of their lives the legacy each leaves. Where is Leia buried? Marasa next to Yakov. For eternity and in perpetuity it is Leia that lies with Yakov. While Raal is in Kev Ral nowhere to be found and in perpetuity all Raal ever dreamed of and wanted. We don't call her Mama. We don't have all kinds of gatherings to dive into our Mama Lea. She is known forever as our mama. Mama Rahul, cry for us again. Mama Raalwaki, cry for us again. Mama Rahul. So each one throughout their lives thought they were denied their dream, but ultimately their legacy in perpetuity is exactly their dream. Leia is Yakov's wife with Rael buried elsewhere. And Rael is Mama Rael. She remains forever our mother. She is forever our Mama Rahul. Forever our mama. Um, we're out of time. One more. Two more. I said I was going to get to the end of the para and I failed again. I am a failure, but as I wrote about last week, sometimes you got to punt the end of the para. And when you know when to punt, hopefully ultimately you're going to win. I punt a lot the para here. Um, we'll do one more which is Rabbi Salvich's insight. Oh man, I really wanted to tell you this other one. It's too long. Rabbi Salvich's insight on those same words says Rabbi Salvich, the concept of thanksgiving involves expressing gratitude to God for that which had been attained while accepting that it's impossible to acquire everything. What Leia introduced us to, it's very similar to what Benab just said. What Leia introduced us to was saying thank you even when you realize it's not everything you want. We thought that thank you always meant when I get when I'm answered for everything I want in a particular situation then I say thank you [clears throat] but maybe I don't offer thanks when I only get partially what I want. What Leia introduced us to is that it's worthy and warranted and we have a responsibility to say thank you even when we don't get everything that we want. Only after her fourth son was born did Leia finally resign herself to the truth of her relationship with Yakov. So even though she did not get what she wanted with Yakov, she realized, you know what, even when my dreams are incomplete, it still warrants a thank you. Okay, one more I did want to tell you. I got a [clears throat] new safer. Thank you to my friend Meny who's always sending me news forum. It's called Mayor. It's a collection of his Torah from and others all his Torah organized based on para. So very quickly we'll end with this Torah tells us very end of our para. Now Jacob has worked for Ra worked for Leia shepherd spotted speckled takes leave of Lavan goes on his way and when they partak just bear with me one more minute we'll end with this page 168 at the very end of our para love wakes up in the morning kisses his children and gives them you see from here the power of parents the children even the wicked evil lowlife love understands the gift and the blessing of being a parent. Hug and kiss. Keep tight and bless them. The Jacob goes and goes says, "It's not for not that the Torah shifts it language that love and went to his place and Jacob goes on his path." What does this mean? Love went love on lived all these years with a Yakov. Love was gifted for a sadic a righteous holy man to live in its midst all this time. And yet when they part, you know where love on went? Limo right back to the place he was in before he ever met or lived with Yakov. Love goes Limo. Do we revert back to exactly who we were? We have a privilege. We have an opportunity. We have a chance. We get to host somebody big, somebody special. We go on a special mission, special trip. We attend a wonderful great shir. After whatever experience we have, are we shove limo? Do we go right back to the place we were in? Do we revert right back to our default? Are we not transformed? Are we unchanged? Do we go right back to who we were? That's Lavan. Lavan lives of the Yakov and instead of being influenced by him, he returns vayasha of Lavan Limo. He goes right back to that same place of loving money and deceit and obscured values and priorities. Whereas where does he go says leo he's back on the path he's growing he's progressing he's achieving he's learning he's advancing love on goes love this is who I am take it this is it what you see is what you get this is who I am this is who I am forever he just goes back to his place Whereas Jacob goes where? Leo. Back on the path. The path of growth. The path of progress. The path of achievement. I thought it was a beautiful mash. We end with it. Stay happy. Stay holy. Stay healthy. Should be a day of bisto.