Stop talking about God! | Living with Emunah #362

Good morning book. Welcome back to living with Amuna. So great to be together as always to work on work out our Amuna muscles and the way in which we see the world. As always we begin with our attitude of gratitude. Tremendous thanks to our dear friends Abby and Bella Morgan who sponsored our series in memory of do Rabbi Dr. Ryan Galbat in memory of Bella's mother Dr. Ellen Chanzer. May Hashm watch over all of our soldiers. Also, our series is co-sponsored anonymously in memory of 30 fallen soldiers and alumni of Ben Davidid Yeshiva in AI Sadan. Incredible place. They lost 30 soldiers. This week we're highlighting Moshe Yadida Lighter. Hashem Yiko, 39, fell in combat November 2023 in northern Gaza. He was married and a father of six. Served 15 years as an in an IIAF commando unit. who is a platoon commander, paramedic, medical student, trained kared for integration into the elite intelligence unit is a huge huge loss. Also this morning she in particular sponsored by Alisa Narik and Aviva and Michael Wogan in honor of the milestone birthdays of their parents David and Maxine Wogan our longtime beloved members. They're very happy birthday to them should be healthy and happy for many years to come. And this morning I'm sponsoring Shar also in honor of the birth of my granddaughter who I couldn't be more excited. Her name is, drum roll please, Kayla Amuna. I am calling her Amuna. I've been asking my kids to name a grandchild Amuna Shira. Like Amuna, Amuna Shir. [laughter] How great would it be to have a grandchild named for the Amuna? Amuna Shir. Amun. So, Kayla Amuna and we're so excited and happy and blessed. Beyond blessed and we bless all those who are waiting and longing. They should hold beautiful children in their arms. And uh that's why is not here this morning. Live shout out. She's listening. She just sent me a picture with Kayla Amuna or Amuna as I like to call her listening to the Amuna Shir. So Amuna, this is dedicated for you. And also a shameless plug. Even if you don't ordinarily get Mishbah magazine, you must get it this week. There's an extraordinary article by Yor Rebbitson. Y has an amazing article from Bokeh to Busha, the long journey home. You'll want to read it. It's in this week's Mishbah. I don't get any I don't get any royalties from Mishbah magazine. I'm not telling you to subscribe. I'm just telling you get this week's because it's an article you want to see. Let's start with an Amuna story that wasn't an email but it came yesterday. Our family was here. We got a lot of sim. We feel so blessed. Bleara. Everybody's lives should be showered with weekends like we had with filled with simha. So my children were heading back yesterday in different directions. One was going to PBI to catch their flight to New York. there was an accident on the highway and they were running late and they were a little panicked understandably so watching the clock tick and uh I don't know if they appreciated it or not I just send the sticker embrace your place and I send the picture but it turns out that their Uber drivers at Alabad and was really excited to be taking them and went out of his way to weave through traffic and try alternate routes to be able to get them there to make their flight and my son-in-law sent me a screenshot how they exchanged numbers and stayed in Maybe they'll learn together on the phone this Uber driver and uh you know you press Uber and you don't know it just searches for drivers in your area and we think that the Uber algorithm is random. Who will be the driver assigned to you? But it's not Uber assigning the driver. The Almighty is the one who assigns the right driver for you. And it could be the driver that drives really slowly and you miss your flight. And that's also a sign from Hashem. And it could be also the Uber driver who is the best driver who goes out of his way and gets you there. And either way, they made it. It was incredible. And shout out to the Uber driver. Lastly, our our learning this morning is for a Rafu complete, speedy, painless recovery. My dear friend Miklona Ben Lea underwent serious surgery and he should bounce back quickly. He deserves it with his family only enormous. We love him and we're wishing him well and thinking about him this morning. Okay, a few emails. So, the first email comes from someone who had emailed previously. And the previous email was about their IVF and their egg retrievalss and the frustration, the pain and the where is Hashem and how could it be while waiting. And then they followed it up with this email literally this morning. Rabbi Goldberg, I've been meaning to write this email for a few months now. Every week I listen today, I will write an email and life sometimes just get in the way. You mentioned a few weeks ago people sometimes always write when something's tough. They forget to share when you what you were praying for finally happened. I wanted to share that. Please, God will be expecting a baby in the next week or so. I just reread the email I sent you in February and I cannot believe how much time has passed and how many more blessings were shown to us since one of the chapters in the book that one day in my life or afterward will come out. One of the chapters should be the backtoback emails. The people who wrote one email, woe is me and where is God and how could this be and why? who later sent a second email. Not everybody does. We dive in that they can who say it's turned around and let me tell you what I learned and what I gained and how I grew from that process of what I was so in pain about. So this is one of those I just want to share with you what transpired leading up to the second round of treatments which looking back were just huge hugs from Hashem. I started another round and usually you get tested and go to the doctor every few weeks to determine when the transfer can happen. It happened to be that we had to do it sooner rather than later in the cycle. The night before we had to go in, we had a kanuka sabias for our new home that we had moved into a month before. We invited a lot of friends and it was really beautiful. We had a muz on the front door when we moved in. So we ended up putting some others around the house for the blessing with 10 men present. One of the men was a father of was a father. I asked him if he could take some of the old muzzles down that were left from the other family who lived here because we never ended up changing them. He said, "Of course. I had a feeling when we moved in that the mazuza that was on my son's room was not kosher and we said we would change it but never did. When he took down the muzza, I asked him to open the cloth and see if there was something wrong with it. He was saw the word levan children was pussle. I couldn't believe it. We changed the muza to one that was kosher and the next day I went for the transfer and that was the one that worked. It was like all the events up to then were signs and hugs from Hashem showing us he's doing all the nos. It was very emotional. We found that in shush and we're expecting and since then we've been so grateful to Hashem and said now it's your turn to bestow this blessing on us. It's really true. Mashana Mak Mashana Mazle the word masle muck's man lashan were so apparent and true and transpiring for all these events to happen and really make us thankful and grateful thank you for the class yada yada yada blah blah blah god will share news of a new baby please God merit hashem amen very soon now I want to be clear about something it's an amazing story and I'm so glad that she wrote and please follow up with the email I can't wait I got an email yesterday you just have to go on this add tour with me for one I got an email yesterday. I'm not making fun. I'm saying I struggle with that. I got an email yesterday from someone that said, "Last year I donated to the Beas Global campaign in the merit of my niece that she should get married. Just want to tell you she just got engaged. Mazatlev to which I wrote back, don't forget to donate to this year's global campaign in the merit that. But anyway, we've got a new sigula. Someone wants to get married, have children, you got to donate to the BRS Global campaign. It's very clear from that email. We have a new school. We'll take out ads in newspapers, send in the name with the donation, and it's now a new school. Okay, back to the regular schedule program. It's a great email, and I'm so happy she followed up. And Bishova, what incredible news. Is it because the muza was puzzled with that word that she wasn't having children? I struggle for that. Do we have makos? We have sources that a muza is protective, is spiritual, is holy. Absolutely. We go out of our way to ensure we have kosher muzas, we have mudra muzas, we have excellent muzas. We should go out of our way to do that. But I stopped short of connecting dots. And I'll tell you why. You know, when when many years ago in between our second and third children, my wife had a still birth. And it was a boy. We went on to have six girls before our son who had his bar mitzvah shabas. But it was a still birth. It was obviously a very painful, very difficult time. I'm not raising it for you to feel bad. We're beyond blessed, beyond, beyond, beyond. We were moving right around that time. And we took down our muzas and had found that the mazuza on the front door, the case was there. There was no muza in it. The bottom piece had come off. The muza had fallen out. We never even saw it. Maybe someone stole it. There was no muzza. And someone I shared it with reacted, "Oh, now we know why." Like there was no muzza and that's why they still birth. I and I spoke to great rabbis who agreed with me or who validated my feeling. I don't want to believe in a god who people who did nothing wrong and don't deserve it and had no way to know and couldn't have avoided it but a muza fell out without their knowing it or the muza had absul that God would make them go through such pain for that. I just I I don't I I want to believe in Hashem there's meaning there's reason there's purpose either we deserve or it's nothing we did wrong but we need to learn from it. It's for our best and our good. But this notion, so I'm so appreciative. I don't want to sound like I'm not appreciative or I'm disagreeing with the email for sure. There's something in it and there's something to feel and it's an amazing story that it turns out that just that day and the next day the transfer and it worked. That was the one that worked and mazova and it's fantastic and I don't want to take away from the story whatsoever. But I also don't want anyone to ever feel like oh if my muza was puzzle that's why I did this I deserve this. It's my fault. So when it comes to those associations, I I tread very lightly and I try to be very careful, but couldn't be more excited for this good news. Dear Rabbi Goldber, hope you had a beautiful show where Srogs are easy to come by with lots of opportunities to purchase. My newly bar mitzvah was an eye for nice things. Was looking forward to choosing a beautiful Srogue. My husband had gone ahead and purchased set with what was known as a closed box Srogue, which means you can prepick your Srog based on look. It's a random box selection based on level. Kosher, kosher, mahud, mahud, mahud. My husband ordered my son a kosher mahudo. When he opened the box, he was so disappointed. He said it was an ugly estrog. He then tried convincing my husband to buy him a new esrog. They came to an agreement. If they would learn a certain davkamar together, my husband would partially pay for a new esrog and my son would contribute from his bars for money. That night, he came home and he found the most beautiful yellow Moroccan esrog with a green gartle and a pitum. He was so happy. The next day, he was so excited to show me. He ran up to his room to bring it down, opened the box. As he removed the Srogue, the pitum fell off, rendering the Srogue unusable. This sounds like an Agnon story, like a shy agnone story. He started crying and crying real hard, meaningful tears. I didn't know what to do. I let him have his moment. And I said, and then he said, "Why did Hashem do this to me? Doesn't he want me to do the mitzvah?" It was a living with Amuna moment for my son. We talked about nice stories that happened or things that didn't go our way, but this was a real and raw. I said, "I understand you're disappointed, but what? What if tomorrow in Kag during Hosamas it would have fallen off. What would you have done? These are the moments that make you big. Hashem is giving you an opportunity to still get another esrog took him a few moments he heard it off he went for his third esrog when it turned out the box esro that he first received the r said was not mud or not even kosher. The place he brought it had to give my son a refund which he used to fund the third esrogue which was beautiful. As we were setting the table for Khag, my son placed the srogue without the pitum as a centerpiece on our table as a reminder of his living with a muna story. And anyone who came into our suka asked me to retell the story. Why is there an esorg without a pitam as the centerpiece? So what a beautiful thing the image this 13-year-old boy was living with ammona. You got to embrace what happens and not know why. And it became the centerpiece. the centerpiece. Now, on sukus, those are very expensive centerpieces. After sukus, that makes for a great inexpensive centerpiece. The esro. Okay, next. I have to tell you a funny story. I was trying to wake up my eighth grade daughter one school morning, a challenge every single day. She wasn't budging, so I stayed in her room cleaning up while calling out to her. I decided I might as well hear some amuna as I cleaned. And I like when she hears it, too, even in her sleep. So, I turned on one of your shir room. Suddenly, a head pops up under the blanket and a sleepy voice says, "Did you hear what your amuna person just said? You are where you're meant to be. I'm in bed. I'm meant to be in bed." Then her head went straight down under the covers. It was hilarious. I'm glad I could be defending the eighth grade girls to sleep in. I am where I'm meant to be with the covers back over her head. But I like it. I'm the Amuna. Did you hear what your Amuna person just said? Anyway, that was a great email. Last email last week, we spoke all about the poetry reading contest and Psalm 23. Hashem, Hashem, you're my shepherd. Not let me not lack because you're my shepherd. I have everything I need, but let me never be lacking in knowing that you're my shepherd. Someone heard this year last week and sent me, they live in Sydney, Australia, and they were walking on the street behind this guy who was wearing a jersey. and his jersey was number 23. And instead of having a name on the back of his jersey, it says Psalm 23. This is his jersey. Psalm 23. That is his jersey. I don't know who this guy is, but he's living with Amuna. Showing off his guns, but he's living with Amuna walking around. He doesn't have a name on his jersey. What does he have? The number 23. Michael Jordan and Psalm 23. Not Jordan, but Psalm 23. Incredible. We got more, but let's get back to our text. And I have good news for you. Somebody heard our shir last week. Somebody who sponsored Abu's original and sent 75 copies are coming to the shul. So everyone's going to get their own copy of the safer that we're learning. You could underline mark it up. I don't believe this one's translated appears in English yet. One of the benefits of coming in person. Yesterday at the parasure we had a giveaway for those who come in person and munir. Come in person. I know if you don't live here, you can't fly in every week. I mean why not? You can but but you can't fly in every week. But we've got to motivate and reward our local community, our offline world who come in person as well. We're on page 125. There are extra copies if you want to be looking inside. So far, we learned at Bashem very counterintuitively and somewhat paradoxically that faith in Hashem is something that we davin for. We daven for faith in Hashem, which is bizarre. The very thing that we're missing is knowing that there's Hashem. And what's the answer? Ask Hashem to help us know that there's Hashem. It sounds paradoxical and it sounds peculiar and it sounds like it makes no sense, but it's exactly how it works. Hashem, Hashem, as I go through my life, when I'm scrambling and weaving and making my way to Palm Beach International Airport to catch a flight, when I'm waiting for a retrieval and a transfer and please God, the good news of a bash to a healthy baby. Let me loar let me never be lacking in knowing you're my shepherd. as we spoke about last week, to not just talk or learn about the shepherd, but to come to know and feel the shepherd, to talk to the shepherd and to hear the shepherd talking to us and to feel the love of the shepherd. You know, the altar of Kelum points out that Mosher Rabenu is chosen as the quintessent quintessential permanent leader of our people. That's his last name, Moshe. And what's his last name? Rabenu. our teacher forever. That wasn't his last name. I don't think he wrote that in on his driver's license application, but that's the name that we call him, the appellation that he carries, Moshe Rabenu. He's our teacher forever. How did he earn that spot? Why did God assign him that mission? Represent me, demand of parro, take the people out, transmit and teach the Torah, and forever be associated. So much so that we call it Toras Moshe, the Torah of Moshe. What behavior did Moshe show? Was it that Moshe was the most brilliant mind? He was the most brilliant. Was it he was the most humble? God himself testifies that Moshe is the most humble. Was it he had the longest one? He was the most careful to only have the highest kashra standards. What is it that Moshe did that earned him that place? And the author of says, you know what it was? Mosher was no. He had the most sympathy and empathy. He cared the most for the people around him. This is not the time, but there are countless stories from the Torah that show that. But where did it all begin? in the altar of Kelm takes us to a medish. Moshe's first job. How did he begin his career? He grew up in the palace, a prince. When he comes out and intervenes to save somebody who's being unfairly abused, he has to flee. And where does he run? To Midyan. And what does he do? What job does he get? He's a shepherd. Mosher Abenu is a shepherd. Mosherenu is a shepherd. He's a shepherd and he cares for the sheep. And Hashem is watching. By the way, not only Mosher Rabbin. We just sat in the suka and welcomed our seven shepherds because our holiest teachers and leaders began their lives and careers and positions of leadership as shepherds because a shepherd has to be attentive and attuned to a sheep. A shepherd can't play on his phone. Has to be watching, supervising, loving, caring, keeping all those sheep on the der on the path. They can't veer off on another path. loving each one, caring, nurturing each one. Did you sleep? Did you eat? Have you had enough to drink from the from the uh river? Are you okay? So, the med tells us that Mosherenu, the shepherd, is tending to his flock, to his sheep, and is used and he's taking care of them and one of the sheep wanders off and is drinking from a river and everybody else is ready to move. There's always that sheep. I've led a lot of trips to Israel, missions of adults, children. There's always that sheep. Everyone's on the bus. Where is so and so? [clears throat] The bathroom. Needed a drink. They got up late. They're lagging behind. There's always that sheep. Now, I'm not so kind. So, my inclination is to say, "We warned you. We're not waiting for everyone. We're not letting our schedule fall behind because of one straggler. We're out of here. Take an Uber, take a get, take a taxi, meet us there." We don't do that. But I'm inclined to do that. But Mosher Abenu the Medish describes goes over to that little sheepah and the medish paints this picture this beautiful image. He puts the sheep around his neck on his shoulders and he carries this exhausted entire sheep. And he gives the sheep to drink to be able to the sheep reinvigorate and come back alive. And most Hashem looks down and says, "That's my man. That's my leader. That's my leader." What did he exhibit? That love, that care, that attentiveness. He refused to neglect. He refused to ignore even one sheep. He wouldn't move on. Care for everyone with what they need. And that's Hashem. He's our shepherd. That's how he loves us. It's not a coincidence. By the way, what's the root of the word roi? Ray also spells rhea. What's a rhea? A friend. A she a shepherd is the sheep's best friend. The shepherd is the sheep's best friend. And Hashem is our best friend. Nephesh. The best friend of my nephesh is my father in heaven. You did nephesh. My yidesh, my best friend, my biggest confidant, the one who knows me and gets me and loves me unconditionally and gives me the benefit of the doubt and stands by my side. The best friend of my soul. The best friend of my body is shakureri. The best friend of my body is a good steak. The best friend of my body is a nice wine. The best friend of my body is good sleep. My body has all kinds of friends. Some are good friends. Some pretend they're good friends, but they're bad friends. Some are outright bad friends. body have all kinds of friends. Who and what is the best friend of your soul? We sing it every week at nephesh. The best friend of my nephesh of my soul. It's my father in heaven. It's my soul's best friend. Hashem roi. God, you're my shepherd and my best friend. And loar, let me never be lacking or missing. Let me never not feel fully with clarity and confidence. You're my shepherd and you're my best friend. Loar, let me never be lacking or missing the knowledge and feeling and faith that you are my best friend. That you are my best friend always. And then we continue the what does that mean? That not where do you put the ka ordinarily? Previously we put the comma to Hashem standing opposite his wife that Rifka conceive. But the says that's not what it means. Put the comma differently. And what did hem? Let my wife, no matter what she's going through, no matter how much pain she's in, no matter how long she's waiting, let her see Hashem opposite her always. I can't tell you how many emails I get. I haven't really read them so much that are filled with the questions of I'm ready to give up. I've been waiting for a sh. I'm at whatever age. I've gone out countless times. I'm waiting for that child. I'm struggling with parnasa. I'm trying to overcome yet another illness, yet another surgery. And I want to clarify last week I mentioned somebody who was taken on on the incredible hatal. That was that was that was exactly reasonable. That was not I was not using that as a case of unreasonable in the question and answer after that person has gone through needs for him too. He should have complete speedy healthy my dear friend should bounce back and be fantastic. That trip he took was what was expected and demanded and reasonable. Not the opposite. said I just want to clarify. So a person can be going through such a difficult time and feel I give up on you. I'm done with you. I'm walking away from you. I've turned to you. I've denied to you. I've surrendered to you. I've waited for you and you're nowhere to be found. So I'm done. So we dab in for that person two things. One we dab for the person that their should be answered. Find that sh have that baby that rafu. But we also dab for that person that this process should not make them lose Hashem. Let them lean into Hashem instead of losing Hashem. Let them get closer to Hashem instead of further from Hashem. We see and we feel like Moshe the shepherd their pain. We see and we feel it with sympathy and empathy. And that should motivate and stimulate in us. One one we d they be answered. But also we add and dav let them come close to Hashem. That could happen with our own children. Our own children could be going through a tough time and we daven that it be resolved with friends in school in life but also we should d that through it they find Hashem not lose Hashem that that's this it's an incredible rupture was domining of course that Rifka should get pregnant of course he was domining Rifka should have a baby but he was also domining that Hashem noishto Hashem should always be opposite his She should never lose Hashem. So, we're in the middle of the top paragraph on the left column page. That we too can d for. It sounds like it makes no sense. I'm not sure if I believe in you. Let me d that I believe in you. But who do we d that I believe in you? I'm dominating to you that I come to believe in you. Doesn't make any sense. Doesn't have to. Doesn't have to. It works. It works. Turn to Hashem. Turn to Hashem and ask him for Hashem. Let me not only feel Amuna when I'm saying the words of the sitter to let me not only feel amuna when I'm in the machir. Let me not only feel amuna when I'm holding little baby amuna in my arms, but let me feel amuna when I'm in traffic, when it's not going my way, when it feels like it's a no, when I'm going through a hard time. Part of our every day should be let me increase and grow and feel and see you everywhere I go. to combine art with to for others that Hashem is no d for others that they see Hashem that Hashem is ever present in their life and to daven for our for ourselves. I try to do this since we began the amunishir is to not just relegate the amunir to Wednesday mornings and then the rest of the week regular schedule program of no amuna but to live the amunir every minute of every day of every week of every month of every year of our lives that everywhere we go and everything that we experience and all that we interpret and all that we see and all that we try to make sense of that we do through the glasses and through the prism through the perspective of amuna hashem I'm asking you hashem for help it's so hard it's not Easy. I mentioned the drush on Shabas. The drush on Shabas, my son's bar mitzvah. I he would not let me speak about him. And a lot of people say that, but they mean speak about me. A lot of people when they say don't speak about me, what they mean is don't forget to speak about me. You know, before the dinner, before the event, the chairman, the board, don't please, please don't don't speak about me. Don't speak about me. Sometimes what that means is don't forget to go on and on about me. But when my son meant it said it, he he meant it. if you could tell or saw his laning kishmo. He's very shy and he didn't want me. So I thought to myself, instead of speaking about him, I'm gonna speak to him. Instead of describing the first 13 years, I also think it's time to pivot a little bit. Bear with me for one little rant. It's a beautiful thing and it's reflective of the generation we're living that we and I do this now professionally that when there's a baritzvah boy, we talk about him like he's God's gift to the earth and he's lived a hundred years and he's changed the world and he's a we we give him a logo. He's a franchise now and there's a logo on the amaka and he's amazing and I and it's a beautiful thing and it's what we need. It's what this generation needs. It's not it's what this generation needs. But it used to be that a boy turned bar mitzvah. He poured some schnaps ate some made and said to the boy, "You're a man. Here's what's now expected of you. Step up. We need you. Here's what's now expected." So I decided to go old school. Not with the scotch and kick. Unfortunately, it was a little more than that, but at least with my speech. And instead of talking about his first 13 years, I said, "Shai, I want to tell you what we hope and dream for your next 107." And I told him six things, six values, six ideas, six things. There were at least 13, maybe 130. But neither he nor the room full of people with the attention span of a 13-year-old were ready for and more. Maybe they weren't even ready for the six. So one of them was this, believe in Hashem. Amuna, they were all six things. Believe in Hashem, believe in yourself, believe in they were believe six things that you should believe in. So believe it. And what did I draw from? I drew from Torah says the Noah didn't go into the until it began to rain. Why? Because mika he was somebody who was a he was small. I could never say it if Rashi didn't say it. Didn't say it. He was somebody who was small and diminished in amuna in he believed what he didn't believe. And he didn't go into the table of the ark until it began to rain. And there's all interpretations. The famous bradich has an interpretation. He really didn't believe in himself. it wasn't hem but says you see that somebody on the outside can go through all the motions of looking like they're listening to Hashem but on the inside there's no relationship with him he writes the lep and he warns you could go to shul learn the dafomi give stuck shake the lulah sit in the suka blow the chauffeur on the outside you're the perfect Jew but do you have a relationship with Hashem are you talking to him are you hearing him talking to you do you turn to him in hard times do you fall and feel into his embrace. Are you living? Are you in conversation? Is your life one ongoing conversation with Hashem? Hashem, please let the shear go well. Thank you that the shear went well. I hope that the ride to the airport works out. I got to get to this wedding and meet the new kid. But the life is one long ongoing conversation with Hashem. Before the things we have to do, after the things we have to do, even sometimes in our own head, during the things that we're doing, life is what. So you see from here that Noah, who Hashem was talking to and Noah was compliant. He did everything Hashem asked. On the outside, you could be doing it all. So many people in the Jewish people on the outside look like they're doing it all. But on the inside, they're they're empty. There is no relationship. There is no feeling. There is no awareness. There is no connection. They're talking. They're spending their lives talking about the shepherd, but they have yet to come spend time with the shepherd. Spend time with the shepherd. Talk to the shepherd. Be shepherded by the shepherd. That's what we're doing. And that's what is suggesting is one of the things we can and should davin for. We d for our health and we d for our partn for our family. We d for our davin that we have the amuna. Hashem Rowi loar. We got to get these jerseys. Psalm 23. That's our team on the front. Living with Amuna. Team living with Amuna. Who are the players? Psalm number 23. Now starting for the living with Amuna team. Psalm 23. Yay. We're gonna that that's our team. Hashem Roi. Loar. Let me never be lacking in knowing that you're my friend, my best friend, and my shepherd. Best friend. We have best friends. BFF, DMC, all the lingo. 67, I don't even know what that means. That's the new one. All these lingo. I try to stay, you know, I'm young, so I try to stay young. So, >> I thought you were going to ask me to define what's a DMC, what's a BFF, what's a 67. So, BFF is a best friend forever. And the DMC is my deep meaningful conversation. And the other one, I don't even know what it means. The numbers, I don't think anyone knows what it means. And supposedly that's the whole shtick of it. But so even our best friend, even the BFFs, I I have a house. I I live lived with a lot of girls. There's a lot even the BFFs with whom you have the greatest DMC's. There's a lot of drama. There could be a lot of drama because you told and then they told the person they weren't supposed to tell and then the thing and the thing and you did. There's only one friend on the planet. There's only one friend in the world, in the universe. There's only one friend that whatever we say or reveal or confide it is 100% confidential that listens without judgment that loves us and wants the best for us with zero ulterior motive possible and that is the the absolute best friend of Hashem. Hashem roi hashem you are my shepherd. Rohi means shepherd and friend. Hashem you are my shepherd my friend. Let me never be lacking in knowing you're my shepherd. Again, the is traditionally this was understood to mean Hashem because you're my shepherd. I have everything I need. I have everything I need. You're my shepherd. Whatever I have is what I need. Comes and he retouches it and he says, "No, what it means is let me never be lacking that you're my shepherd. that and that's something that we have to daven for. We dive in for just like did fork we do for ourselves and the people around us. It's a new kavana a new thing to think about every day while we den and you could decide do you want to say it in your shakas is it what you want to think about when you light candles on shabas all the people in your life and dav for them that they have amuna that hashem is no hashem is opposite they see him they feel him they love him and for ourselves each and every day davin hashem whatever I'm going through whatever is happening in my life let me feel let me know let me have clarity and confidence that none of it is random and none of it's chance. None of it's accidental and none of it's coincidence. It's all carefully curated and choreographed from you above. It's hard to feel that. It's hard to know that. It's hard sometimes to accept that and to live that. And that's why we have to dav for it because there's nothing good that happens without ding. So we think why do I have to d for amun? I am go to the shir. I get amuna emails. I buy the amuna books. Not mine. Others. There's so much about amuna. It's really in to have amuna right now. It's really in It's really in to talk about having amuna. I hope it's as in to have amuna. It's very in to talk about having amuna. I hope it's as much as in to have the amuna. Have the amuna in those moments. It's really hard. It's really hard when the things don't go our way. And I have some of those emails I didn't read that include some of that. So that's artilo. So you think what do I have to do when I am? The answer is you never have enough. If it's not growing, it's getting smaller. It's not getting stronger, it's getting weaker and it's atrophying. Person has to always be increasing and elevating to see him more, talk to him more, feel him more, love him more, know that he's there more. That's the reason and purpose for this all all of yk, all tora, all of a platform for a relationship with hashem. There are so many people who are doing all the motions, but on the inside it's empty. We have to not just talk about the we also have to talk about the shepherd because the shepherd wants us to avoid 39 categories of creative labor of shabas. Shepherd wants to make us before we drink and eat. Shepherd wants shepherd wants us to talk about him also. But the whole point is not just to talk about a shepherd without knowing him is to better come to know him. And we need to do that in our homes in our schools in yeshivas in our community in our shs. We need to just not talk about the shepherd. We need to talk to the shepherd and hear the shepherd talking to us. I know it's early, but I have to end today. I have to head to the airport of a wedding tonight. I'm going to meet little amuna kaya amuna who I call amuna mashem all of us our lives. We should be successful in domining and asking for more amuna for ourselves and the people around us. We should be successful in the which by by the way it's exactly what also says Hashem let Hashem be opposite with me always opposite with me always. We should be successful and that we see Hashem opposite us always feel him in our lives everywhere we go. You should answer for the good. Everyone's lives should only be overflowing with sim and braha locally and you should have to travel and fly to enjoy it and see it. We should report to each other good news especially those who shared some of the challenges and hardship should be able to write in and tell us about the simas should only add and come. Thank you so much. We'll pick up with the question and answer mitem next week. Thank you.