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Sit Down and Grow Up: Introduction to Eicha and Eicha 5783
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- Introduction - Singing - The Definition of Destruction - Eicha - Kinnos
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it's difficult to transition it's
difficult to
go from a regular weake
day the hustle and the
bustle with working and being
productive to transform our
mindset to gather to sit on the floor
and to feel the
pain to feel the loss and to feel the
anguish of a people in a history
of a past and for too many a
present that is filled with so many
tears so to help
us to help set that mood to help us get
us into that
place before we share a few words let's
sing
together let's grow together let's mourn
together let's grieve together let's be
moved to feel together
[Music]
this is
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this is
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of
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this
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join with our brothers and sisters
around the world in the hope
of that if we grieve together if we
mourn together if we cry together be to
dance together and to sing together and
to celebrate together
[Music]
J
you
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GL
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the
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my friends
tonight yet
again for another year we find ourselves
sitting on the
ground pausing in our
lives to
reflect to think about the
pain and the
sorrow the
loss and the
there it's
destruction
devation so
many that were gathered
M so many losses and so much destruction
and so much
Devastation throughout our history the
national
calamities of course the destruction of
the TU mikdash with all the significance
of what that
means but it's also the Inquisition and
the Crusades and the pums and the
expulsions and the systematic attempt to
exterminate
us it's also the
terror and it's also the
tragedy so tonight we sit
here we sit here to cry
to cry for
theban butb is not about a
building destruction is not
just large massive numbers and
Collective National
Calamity hban is every Every
Soul I don't have to tell all of
you that for our community
tishu came
early seven months
agoat when
we our community CL saw the
world and most of all the Moscow its
family
lost
pilas the special amazing n old estey
sweet
pure
kind and
innocent smart
fun who amuna whose
faith and resilience and positivity were
so far well beyond her
years and there's not a day that goes
by that we don't think about
EST that we our community our family
doesn't feel the pain of the
MOs who three weeks and nine days in
Tish this period of time doesn't end for
them tomorrow night but that that
devastating devastating loss that empty
seat at their table that empty place in
their car that empty room and bed in
their home that empty place in all of
our hearts that
of her
loss every day is Tisha for
them and by extension for
uson devastating destruction and
loss every Nish every
individual we're only halfway through
2023 and how many pure innocent Souls
were murdered in Israel due to acts of
Terror June 20th
ofer fireman Alisha an mov gone down at
a gas station May 30th tamari shot while
driving on a Road near his home
Ines May 11th inan killed from a rocket
from Gaza
inov April
7th such a tragic
day
p a family and two cars coming back from
a to you celebrating the joy which are
simply living as Jews in our
homeland when Lucy D and her daughters
Maya and Reno were gun down and killed
the these family's life was changed
forever alesandro perini that same day
killed a terrorist rammed his car into a
prominade in Tel
Aviv March 9th or
eshkar shot by a Palestinian gunman in
Tel Aviv February 27th Elon gandas
killed by a terrorist on a
highway near the Dead Sea February 26
Sal Yaniv and yagel Yaniv Two
Brothers From Hara murdered when a
gunman opened fire in close range at
their
car while they were stuck in a traffic
jam unable to protect
themselves February 10th schom
leaderman and two
brothers p Brothers six and eight years
old yob Isel and Ash
murdered by a Palestinian terrorist who
rammed his car into them at a y bus
stop January 27th ellia Natalie mizi RAF
as corova Ilia
sansi well at the end of daving on
Friday night something we take for
granted in this holy space they finish
cabala shabas they welcome the shabas
queen but that welcome was interrupted
by a terrorist to open fire
the N Yakov neighborhood killing those
seven and you talk about
aan aan that wasn't in a
moment aan that went on for 22
years when
kenberg the niece of one of our members
Alice
green she was 31 years
old on August 9th 2001 which she went
with her three-year-old daughter into
sparrows to get a slice of
pizza a suicide bomber blew himself up
killing 15 civilians including seven
children and injuring a hundred
others but the world had
forgotten was that
KH KH that day in
2001 was so injured she was in a coma in
a coma that lasted for 22 years
her three-year-old never knew her
mother her parents had to come and take
care of her for 22
years no
closure no ability to cry for this horum
that didn't end no ability to move
forward until a couple of months ago
when she finally succumbed to those
injuries and 22 years later another name
was added to the list of sparrow victims
daughter's 25 years old
today that didn't let up for 22 straight
years it's happening in Israel our
brothers and
sisters maybe in reality or maybe
just the hyperbole of the
media but a fighting in a
conflict in the threats of an impending
Civil War
that too many enemies are so happy to
jump on and to celebrate and to
encourage brothers and brothers and
sisters and sisters who disagree about
something
important who the world is
interpreting as the brink of a divided
Israel that's
aan it's
aan how many broken and crushed
dreams how many you've gone another year
without finding their
Basher navigating the world with
loneliness and with
longing and an
eagerness to find camaraderie and
companionship how many
dream of a baby of a child of building a
family didn't come true this year or was
crushed theban theban of INF fertility
theban of
miscarriage so many experience in
silence without anyone knowing or
offering
support theban of still
birth of carrying a baby all those
months for one's body to be ready and
prepared to bring that baby into this
world instead to hold a lifeless baby in
one's arms aan
it's unbearable
pain there are so many people hurting so
so
badly there are so many coros not of our
own
making and that we fought bitterly to
avoid and to
end and there are the
coronos that are
self-imposed and that are brought on by
bad decisions
and by impulsive
actions and by Unfaithful decisions and
choices relationships that are
permanently
broken
destroyed
choices actions that are
irreparable with grave consequences that
change the
trajectory forever of the person who
committed them
decisions that yield lives that
areb that
areb and so tonight we sit here on the
ground we mourn and we grieve and we cry
for Ese and for the
de and for the family of
kenberg and for way too many
others for lives that were rendered
coros through no making of their own and
through people who have to live with
Theon that is of their own
creation but my friends those are all
reasons those arebos as are
results that are about
others that is
sadness that is brought on by
considering theban and the pain of other
people's
lives but what about us
where do we fit
in if you're
among the fortunate and
blessed to have not have experienced a
personalan this year other than by
extension and empathy for
others if nothing that's kurban happened
to you and you didn't make aan of your
life then how do we tap into and lean
into this day how do we feel the pain of
this moment why are we sitting
here on this
ground and I want to suggest to you to
me to
us that momentarily when we hear with it
the
words that our grief and our anguish our
pain and our
sorrow is not only for
others but that we taking time a day 25
hours tonight and tomorrow morning to
think
about to
contemplate theban moments and
choices of Our
Lives you see we live in a
world that is increasingly cuddling
us that wants us to never feel bad and
never beat ourselves
up and so everyone tells you it's okay
you the you did the best that you could
don't worry about it don't be hard on
yourself don't beat yourself up it's all
right you did your best don't ever feel
bad don't feel
down and maybe that attitude is true
some of the time or even most of the
time but not
tonight and not tomorrow
morning tonight and tomorrow
morning feel bad
tonight and tomorrow
morning we beat ourselves
up and we look at the
moments and the
decisions and the things that we've
done that have been hurtful the time
that we squandered they can't make up
the opportunities that are lost the
pieces of ourselves that we killed this
year that we murdered
by
wasting there's not a person in this
room who can't look back on the last
year since last Tish and say that there
wasn't something that hurt their
feelings that there wasn't someone who
hurt their feelings there's no one in
this
room who can't say there was someone who
spoke to them reacted to them wrote to
them made a decision about them
interacted with them that hurt their
feelings that hurt made them feel
bad tonight and tomorrow are not about
our feelings
they're about
realizing that if our feelings have been
hurt then unintentionally without
malice we've likely hurt the feelings of
others as
well we're sitting here and we're
mourning and grieving all those names
that I
mentioned all those
losses that people we love
suffered but we're also mourning and
grieving what for us is the greatest
personal loss there
is and that is the loss of
ourselves the Lost
moments the Lost Chances The Lost
choices the Lost
opportunities what moments did we
squander what people did we ignore what
insensitivity did we
show what message or invitation did we
fail to return what word did we go back
on what gossip did we
spread what mlus did we enter or at
least we got some Joy from following
from
afar who are we unfaithful to in our own
way by coming late or forgetting or
neglecting what trust did we violate by
sharing confidences that weren't our own
to
share who did we cause to feel alone or
isolated or
ignored we remember and we
focus today not on our own
hurt but on the hurt that we caused to
others tonight as we're
honest with
ourselves as we think about and take
stock of what could have
been what relationships could have been
enhanced how much time could we have
used so much more
valuably how many people could we have
helped with could we have
made what Purity could we have
preserved tonight we don't excuse it we
don't defend it we don't justify it and
we're not interested in making ourselves
feel better about
it I'm not here tonight to call you and
to tell you it's okay you did the best
you could don't beat yourself
up tonight we beat ourselves up till
we'll knock to the
ground and and we sit here looking up
and looking out and taking
stock and taking responsibility and
recognizing Theos that we
caused what members of our family did we
speak to harshly or did we not show
enough patience
to who did we not
include who could
we have impacted so positively what did
we look at what did we watch where did
we go what did we
say what Indulgence or Temptation did we
give
into we hurt other people's
feelings we made people feel
bad we
cost we have to own
it we have to genuinely feel bad about
it we have to mourn it and grieve it and
regret it and then tomorrow after Kos
will get up off that
floor and it'll be time to repair it to
fix
it to do better to make it better to be
better but it's not that time
yet
us taught that was destroyed because the
small and the great were made equal and
the simple understanding is there was no
respect for authority there was no
respect for greatness there was no
respect
for there was no respect for people with
credentials or life experience or
leadership everyone was equal there was
cynicism there was no appreciation no
hierarchy no
deference no respect
no and that brings about a but I want to
suggest to you this evening as we turn
to
read that maybe maybe this means
something else as
well many explain the difference between
the word cotton and G cuton is a
child you know a child certainly the
beginning of their
life a child is exclusively focused on
themselves their happiness their need
their want their timetable baby cries
it's hungry and diaper needs to be
changed doesn't matter it's the middle
of the night doesn't matter if it's
inconvenient for the parent and then the
infant and the Adolescent and the
teenager do more of the same to
different degrees but the child the
koton koton exclusively sees themselves
their ego their self-centeredness their
life is centered around their happiness
and their want and their pleasure and
their
need a goodle what does it mean to be a
GLE a GLE is to graduate that mindset
that perspective of being a cuton a GLE
is not about the ego and
self-centeredness a GLE makes room and
space for others a GLE can care and be
sensitive AAL understands the impact of
their behavior and their speech and
their choice a goodal takes
responsibility beyond the self a good
doesn't just live the self but lives the
thou connects with the
other you know Katan says what do I want
to wear where do I want to go what do I
want to watch what do I want to eat but
a G says what does Hashem want from me
what is Hashem asking of me what will
give
Hashem this is a day that we
feel not only theban of the damage that
we've done to the relationships of the
people around
us but this is a day that we reflect on
theban of what we've done with the
relationship with
Hashem to feel his pain to identify with
his sense of
neglect
imagine imagine how Hashem feels
violated by infidelity and
unfaithfulness to
him that relationship we had with Hashem
got so bad he moved out he leveled our
house and he hasn't rebuilt it he hasn't
invited us to move back in because we
haven't done the work to repair it to
make him feel he matters to put him
first to be considerate of what he wants
just last
week just last week a Galla poll
showed that Americans belief in God fell
to the lowest point in more than two
decades fewest Americans believe in God
since the pole has been
taken you understand what that
means that's
Tish
that's
that's fewer and fewer
people believe that our father
exists more and more people deny that
our father is even
real they don't take him into account
they don't care about his values or
priorities they're not invested in a
relationship with him they deny he
exists all
together the
world is increasingly becoming Godless
fewer believe in
God and more are demonstrating their
lack of belief in God through their
choices and definitions and
principles and
policies and the question
is do we even see that as
aan as we're watching the morals of the
values of the world around us
disintegrate and dissolve do we even see
that as
a does it bother us are we pained by it
on behalf of our very
father are we doing anything to fix
it are we declaring he exists are we
demonstrating he exists are we screaming
from the rooftops he
exists stop saying these lies about him
start being obedient to him do we even
see theban of a world that does doesn't
believe Hashem
exists is
real don't be confused between a cuton
and a GLE don't buy into a society or
culture that says that your happiness is
more important than Holiness that it's
all that matters it matters most be
focused on yourself and your pleasure
and your happiness no be a GLE sit on
the floor tonight and grow
up Tisha screams at us it demands of us
it's time to grow
up it's time to care about and see
others and it's time to care about and
see
Hashem last year I spoke about mental
health before a and I got many
emails but I'll close by reading one to
you I'm in the middle of watching your
Tish of speech and I have tears in my
eyes thank you for crying about this
topic of depression anxiety for giving a
voice to those who feel invisible
including myself for
years I got sick because of abuse and
neglect I always say where is the camp
Pasco the high Lifeline for those with
invisible illnesses where are the trips
and where is the money to pay for the
expensive treatments of those with the
invisible
suffering I know exactly what the writer
meant when he prayed he would not wake
up in the
morning thank you for speaking about it
for me every day has a little Tish in
it like a migraine it goes away for some
time but it comes back and the pain
never goes away
permanently as we turn to we're not yet
ready to get up off the
floor tonight we're not cuddling
ourselves and convincing ourselves that
we do the best that we can that we
shouldn't feel bad and not to beat
ourselves up tonight we beat ourselves
up until we knock ourselves onto the
ground and we sit here and we look and
we think about
the not only theban of that's absent EST
Mas Shalom not only a world that's
absent so many victims of Terror
including
one who was lost really 22 years ago but
didn't leave this world until just a few
months
ago we see the coronos that we created
of our own making of our poor
choices we feel bad for the hurt that we
caused for others and
for and if we do
with then
simultaneously a willingness to beat
ourselves up and knock ourselves
down if it causes up to grow up and
later to get up it'll bring
the we continue with a
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when he am
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yes
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before we continue with the reading of
Kos a reminder of the schedule tomorrow
there are three minum tomorrow morning
6:15 7:45 and 9 the 9:00 menu will be
accompanied by explanation introduction
to Kos it'll be recited all the way
until early at 2 p.m. there's a
children's tis B program tomorrow 3:30
to 5:30 drop off and pick up at the sh
and there are several films being showed
at the sh tomorrow 2:30 the foundation
video 2:30 The Great Exchange 4:00 the
rising stronger six o'clock project
Inspire video 7:15 is the second
followed by words of by 8:15 Mar the
Fest ends at 8:49 a reminder tonight as
we take leave throughout Tish all the
way until tomorrow night we don't offer
greetings one to the other there is no
sh Shalom but we are restricted we uh
experience what it means to be isolated
alone to not greet one another the other
details of the laws of TI ofcl
in the email that she sent out and the
weekly continue with Kos page
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for
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spee for
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shom
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