Part 85: Walking Into the Spiritual Gym

okay BTO everyone first of all thank you for accommodating the change in schedule I wish that we should have to adjust for a I appreciate it because of the bris um and it's it's so nice to see that people came anyway in the middle of the morning hours later so barem next week also unfortunately have a conflict Wednesday so we're going to hold it Thursday 8:45 same time same place different day Thursday I sent an email it'll be in a weekly and I'll I'll send a reminder next week as well but thank you for accommodating andem it'll be smooth sailing in our regular lot from there I want to thankor and a orland for continuing to sponsor in memory of their beloved daughter should have an Aliyah and if other people want to sponsor there are weeks available in the future please speak to Linda also our learning this morning is for AA our dear and beloved friend Brian who's undergoing surgery as we learn and as well our dear friend Mike Stern who's undergoing bypass surgery as we learn yudas both should have a speedy complete and painless we've been learning this piece in Al the great Mash of mash of the Jewish people his second volume of Al a collection of the V the mus that he gave which help mold and shape our lives so I believe now the only question is does anyone know where we left off did anyone mark down where we left off somewhere near the bot oh where my ratings perfect okay so that's what we're going to figure out we'll figure it out together so R you remember was quoting the who taught us a very important principle the gamar says just to take us back to where we were the gar says that a person who if you end the that God is the Redeemer of Israel and immediately without any break any barrier any Interruption you start you begin your if you make them in immediate succession one right after the other then you're you guaranteed a POR in the world to come you're in you're in and we ask that's it you're in you could be an unkind callous person a gossiper you could be somebody who dismisses and neglects hm's will you here and uh and all you have to do is say start the all you have to do is start the amid right after you say G you and that's all it takes how could it be how could it be so simple so if you remember ra y developed this idea though what are you really accomplishing it's not a matter about saying the script it's not just as simple as you say those words one after the other and you're in you could do whatever you want and be whoever you want to be what it means is go is God's the Redeemer of Israel it means if as you live in the present you have an eye on God's guiding hands in the past and therefore you feel his presence you feel his love in the present and taking and ushering you into the future means that when you see that g was not a coincidence that when we came out of Egypt or when we survived the Inquisition the expulsions and the Holocaust and the Crusades and when we've survived collectively and individually horrible challenges when you see God's guiding hand and love and support and we realize it's not random it's not chance it's not coincidence it's all the will of the almighty it's all by Design and then you begin your amida so now amida is on the backdrop not of Hashem give me this give me that give me the other thing because I'm hedging my bets I don't really believe you give it I don't know if you're the one who gives it but you know what I'm heding my bets take the medicine I take the vitamin I go to the doctor I do the thing and I'm also going to hedge my bet I might as well I might as well I often see I look around and I see people a minion who don't often come to minion and they C oh yeah I forgot this one's looking for a job I forgot that one's needs a shter for their child I forgot and all of a sudden you remember you know there's no atheist in a fox Soul so some people use daving to hedge on the checklist of things I have to do I don't know if it works it doesn't work I don't know if there's a God or there's no God I don't know if he's involved in my life or he's not involved in my life but I'm going to hedge I might as well I might as well I can't go wrong trying so if that's the attitude towards doing it's kind of an insult of a conversation you speak to somebody and uh and you turn to them for help but you say look I don't even know if you can give the help I don't know who you are but I've been told to speak to you so I'm putting it on my checklist is that person inclined to want to help you we have another one down here is that person inclined to want to help you not if you're so not if you're so rude in the way you reach out to them for help so explains the me that our daving is laced with and when we last left off and we were discussing it we were talking about the importance it's not only about learning davening but learning how to be davers and the difference between the two learning daving is can I memorize the English for all the Hebrew can I quote seven interpretations of what each paragraph of the amida means can I look up each of the from daving and see all the Pim all the on it that's what it means to learn daving and we're going to start doing that we actually took delivery this week of a thousand that we ordered the RCA just came out with a brand new beautiful sitter with commentary and user friendly it's fantastic so we're going to do a sitter launch party to welcome the new sitter and I'm going to start but between the five minutes of our Torah I'm going to try to go through the sitter and explain and I hope that people will bring their sitter don't write in the shoes copy but people will bring their own sitter and make notes in the margins and be able to to make it their own to make a Kenyon on it I'm out I have miscellaneous pages so um why did I say that the sitter oh the sitter thank you thank you so much so the sitter so to learn daving is to learn all the different interpretations to learn to be a daver is to know before whom we stand with whom we're having a connection why we're asking God to feel that we're in his presence to turn to him with such Faith such knowledge to be able to to know that Hashem is a guiding hand that like a a who inter intervenes for S but says we say I said yesterday in the par class right after the we have we brazenly and boldly tell God how to run his world give this one to ra give this one to parasa give me this give this when that we tell hasm how to run his world and then immediately we recoil and we fall on our arm and we say sayem all my suggestions were based on my limited finite humble understanding but we understand I concede with Tak I concede that if it's a choice between going at it your way the Divine infinite I'm nipping in way or my way let's do it your way I'm just telling you from my little perch down here the way it seems to me and I'm also leveling my protest there people around me in pain and hurting I'm protesting Hashem if they're in pain I'm in pain if they're suffering I'm suffering if they're going through surgery or illness or recovery or treatment I'm going through it soem I'm telling you about my pain what you do it that is up to you that's what a does he says you can't destroy s then right away I'm just telling you from my little perspective because I have to I have to level my protest so ding is an exercise in how do we make sure it's a exercise in muscles that we have to work out or else they atrophy how do we make sure by being you sayem all of history until this point you orchestrated it you choreographed it you designed it you put it together it's all you so Hashem just like just like you did it throughout all history now I'm ready for my amid when I ask you I'm not these aren't miscellaneous I know here I'm not there's a couple seats here I'm not telling you Hashem give me this but yeah maybe you do maybe you don't I'm telling you with confidence just like just like historically you were the Redeemer so to now it's an exercise your ding is a ding of how many of us on the way into daving we're complaining we're anxious we're worried we act as if there's no God the second we close the s or maybe if we're talking in we're anxious there's no God and I'm worried on what will be and we DAV but we put a check next to daving as if we D because we said all the words said the words check done what's the point if you're not present in the conversation if we're not there in the moment if we're not mindful so what is the evidence of the mindfulness if we're so doesn't just mean you say it right after it means you were present you were mindful you there was intentionality in being and saying God you're the Redeemer you've always been there and therefore now I'm ready for a conversation with you just like when in the past in my own life I felt like things made no sense but in the end you knew what you were doing I went through that hard time and look what I learned from it look how I got stronger look how somehow it came out for a good sometimes we comprehend it other times we'll never understand it but go is just like in my own life hasem sometimes I can look back at the difficult spot and see I became better I became greater I became stronger we're reading about the tests of Abraham and the tradition is that we too endure 10 tests like Abraham and what's the point of a test you could run away from a test you could run away or it's a you can wave a banner plant a FL flag that here's where I learned something about myself here's where I grew here's where I became bigger here's where I became better there's so many things that unless we were pressed against the wall we'd never discover that capacity within ourselves we'd never believe that we had the ability to do it ever unless we were forced into it forced to have faith forced to have courage forced to believe forced to stand up for forced to find strength unless we were backed into that corner and forced we'd never bring it from potential to real the ran says that's the purpose of every new sound a went through it we each go through it it's hard to identify A's 10 it's even harder sometimes to identify the 10 in our lives but we look at those 10 and we realize they made us who we are even in retrospect many of them we don't welcome and we wouldn't want and we wish we could give back but they made us who we are they made us who we are we wouldn't be who we are without it so daving is that journey of self-reflection it's that exercise in humility that I think I'm all that when I'm outside of when my sitter is closed it's all up to me I got to work hard I got to take initi I got to give my all when I sitter is closed it all depends on me but when I open that sitter it all depends on hem when I open that sitter I can't do it at all it's 100% depends on and to understand this and in order to appreciate this we have to understand four key points you see where we are the AL on the bottom of the first page you want to see where the AL is great did we do I don't know if we did did this last week yes we started this last week okay so we're going to review it come on in you're in the right place this may be a better time actually by the look of maybe we should be doing it midm morning on Wednesday no all right maybe we'll take a vote at the end is an exercise of Faith the middle section right the first three are Praise of God which we offer not to butter him up it's not like God did I mention up beautiful you look today by the way there's a few things I need it's not to butter him up it's that if I'm going to know why am I asking him why am I asking him then I have to know who he is and how he's categorically different than I so the first three are praise then the next 13 are requests supplications and then the last three are gratitude thank you thank you for everything when it comes to we find a we find a novel thing that we don't find when it comes to Torah people don't know this but there's a I only did it once in my life actually I was motivated I don't know that we really do this today but I had just learned I still remember I was in my year in Israel I went to the cotel for whatever reason and I had already D and it wasn't yet time for but you know I connected to in a way I didn't connect to just saying to H so you could offer an you know is that we have to D two times women three times men a day that you have to D in but there's a concept of aava that you can offer another prayer you want to say the 20 times a day you can say it 20 times a day you're not limited to only say it to three you feel moved and you want to find the language the script the template to connect to Hashem more than those three times a day you're allowed to but what is the one condition in order to offer Ana in order to offer a voluntary prayer what must that voluntary prayer have it has to have something new you can't offer another voluntary extra prayer if you're just going to say the same old script if you're just going to read the same old sitter you got to add something personal something new and this is that you don't have to add something new within every take one you thought of a new person so you're already and it's not yet time for and you feel moved you learned about someone else who needs a so you can say to and you can take and you can give and you can do a but you want connect through the amid so as long as you're going to mention them in you think about them talk about them D for them that's new then you can offer and says when it mentions that you can that you're only allowed to volunteer a new daving if you offer AES AES doesn't mean the truth is I needed this atak I just forgot to mention it so I mentioning it now it's only called something new if it's something that just arose that you didn't need before so you've already daved and now you've learned of something new and you want to DAV for it and you're going to mention it volunteer you're allowed to say it again this and in fact in some ways you may be obligated to say it again in in sh the um Pink quotes from the from the bris from that we ra is ding every day so one says D every day once a day it's biblically commanded to connect to reach out to talk to hm once a day the other says no only the ran says only only in a time of need but what comes out according to the ran is that we DAV every day by root by habit by practice it's part of our ritual part of our habit part of our schedule that's the Rabon that's Rabin they instituted it to keep the conversation going because they notate you to talk when you need to talk you wouldn't remember how so if you keep the conversation going I don't know anyone who exercise I was just tell someone this if you miss a day or two you feel it even just two days of missing it you feel it when you get back to the exercise whereas if you keep it going you build up more and more and more stamina and you do better and better and better and it hurts less and less and less so the same is true with daving the unrealized if you never DAV if we don't obligate you to ding when you when you need something when it's time to D in it's going to hurt you don't remember how you're starting from scratch your muscles ache again but if you're ding at least a little bit every single day you're exercising your your amuna muscle every single day then you're staying healthy and you won't ever begin to it won't begin to hurt so you're allowed to you're allowed to add something you're allowed to D I'm sorry again but it has to be something new oh that's what I was telling you the brisar ROV so the brisar ROV says the following he says according to the ran that that it's only D that daving is biblical it means what happens if you DAV already he said shakas this morning and then you hear a dear friend of yours is in surgery say oh that's an a if they're in surgery I'm in surgery I I can't concentrate I can't focus I'm in pain I'm worried you hear about something in Israel you hear about something happening in the world that's an or something in one's own life so according to Brit within the raan you have to DAV again not just you're allowed to DAV again but that daving is D that's biblical so what you did already was reab because you just discharg the daily obligation to DAV but now as in you learned about something you heard about something you feel something which is urgent a crisis now you're biblically obligated to doin again so whether you're volunteer this are you're biblically obligated to turn to hasm and talk to him and and dive into him but there's an idea that you can offer a new prayer as long as it has something new something new only you don't have to say everything else you could just say some say before you should have an as know afterwards but you could say again I still remember this I was at the kotel it was I daved already it was not yet time for the next daving I wanted to connect to Hashem you know what do you know by heart to sit and say all saf to him who knows it by heart but just want you can close your eyes and touch the Cel and offer as long as you offer something new so what is the motivator what is the driver of daving the driver of ding is need is feeling incomplete the driver of daving is the humility to realize I'm not in control it's forfeiting control let's in the first three why does it say not I want to D it again because I'm G to have in mind I have a new interpretation within the first three bras can't D again that's not a justification you have a in the last three I have a new and and what does it mean to be grateful and what I have a new interpretation of gratitude so I want to D again I'm gonna think about the new interpretation of gratitude in the last three can't D again having a new idea in the first three or the last three that not called f that's called Torah save that for a she you're going to give about DAV that's called Torah that's that's a she about DAV which is the davening the middle 13 because what's the core of davening is need I'm incomplete I need I'm inadequate I'm not in control Hashem you again when the sitter's closed it's all up to me right the surgeon doesn't say it's all up to you hasm I'm going to be distracted I'm not going to give it my all if you want it to come out well it'll come out well when we go to work right that's an extreme example when we go to work everything that we do in everything that we do in every Arena of life when the sitter is closed it's all up to us but when that sitter is open it's not up to us at all it's entirely up to hasem so daving is an exercise in the words are important but listen to what he's saying daving is not an experience of tal Torah one of my hesitations of our new sitter is the commentary in the bottom which is more robust and beautiful and draws from many more sources we're familiar with could easily distract people during daving to start reading the commentary and all of a sudden your doing has been replaced by learning so if you take the sitter and not during doing hours you're reading the commentary and you're learning you're you're learning about the sitter that's fantastic it's beautiful it's a it's a fulfillment in t Torah but if you're going to read the commentary when you really should be lost in your own thoughts and connection and submission and davening and humility but three interpretations I never thought of that the way the grar then then you're learning you're not daving so when are you going to DAV if you're learning during daving so that's an amazing thing R is saying based on this that if you have something new in the middle section you could offer a voluntary but in the beginning or the end you can't why because something new in the beginning or end that's a form of learning something new in the middle something new which is a need something new which emphasizes and reinforces Hashem I am nothing without you this is all up to you I forfeit I submit I'm in your hands I am in your hands which is the truth and it is the reality then then that's called the and that justifies we're on the back page now the second half second side if you D into because you're hedging you say look I got it I really have it covered but among the things I got to do is go through the motions of asking you for help but I'm just doing that as a formality because really I got it covered so what do I need to do to make this work out I got to speak to these investors and I got to talk to the bank and I got to work on the PowerPoint and I got to and I got to D in but it's all just on my checklist of things that I do cuz I'm in control so you could ding to Hashem where it's really you're just doing to yourself because you're just viewing that as on your checklist of things to do because you're in control but that's not authentic ding that's not authentic ding if you're ding to Hashem because that's one of the many things you have to do to get what you want then you're not really doing real doing is saying Hashem you're not a checklist you're you're you are the check you're everything you're everything and everything else on my checklist I'm doing because the initiative I have to do but whether all that effort and combination works that's up to you you'll p in for me let me know how it works out if it worked out it was meant to be if it didn't work out it wasn't meant to be and your determination is the one I live by because you're the omnipotent infinite being and I'd rather defer to your judgment than to my own so I'm going to take the initiative and I'm going to work hard like it's all up to me but in the end of the day I accept what's all up to you so where do we work out the muscle every day where is the gym of B it's in the sitter that's the gym the gym equipment of B the weights and the cardio Machines of B are the middle of those are all the different weights of the gym and they all work out just like you're in the and different way to work out different muscles so each of these Bros work out different components of our right maybe is is the one that's most explicit let me never be embarrassed or ashamed let me never pause or hesitate because my faith my is in you people don't realize it in really in the center of is a statement of that's why we're there before I walk into the gym of with I remember how well the last word out worked out and now I go into the gym for the next one walking into the is walking into that gym of it's working at that it's that exercise the Bion of so again it's not just saying words it's not just reciting a script empty words we're going through an experience to build because you need that muscle to be strong for when when the heart hardship comes if your muscle's not strong you're in trouble then and the hardship is going to come because to be alive is to be living a complicated life there's nobody immune there's nobody above and it comes in different forms for some it's health for some it's finances for some it's relationships for some it's mental well-being for some it's it's it's not for us it's seeing people we love it's seeing family members it's children there's nobody who's immune nobody who's immune so will we be strong will we be prepared will we be ready I remember there was someone in N many years ago who had had a uh a big heart attack and was in the hospital I went to visit him in the hospital and he says Rabbi the K Min was meeting much more regularly than and he said the kak minion saved my life I said wow that's like so nice the daving it saved your life you're remembering the nunim while you're in the hospital it saved your life so sweet he said no no no you don't understand the kak minion saved my life I said what do you mean he said you know I started going to the kak minion a year ago and the K minion everybody's got a little bit more energy hopping and bopping and beeping and dancing and clapping and everybody theak mov just moving it's just movement movement movement he said I went and I loved it but I'm out of shape I was overweight out of shape and so the first few weeks I couldn't keep up everybody's jumping and dancing and hopping and clapping and I'm out of shape I can't breathe I can't breathe I'm out of breath I can't keep up so I was determined I want to get the full experience of the kak the Happy minion I want to be able to dance I want to be able to sing I want to be able to jump up and down he said so I started exercising and working out so I'd be able to catch my breath he said and when I had this heart attack the doctors told me that if I had been in the shape I was in a year ago I wouldn't have survived the heart attack the only reason I survived it is because I had been exercising I was in improved shape to be able to withstand it when it came said so the saved my life it's a great story so the same is true when it comes to God forbid a person's going to wait for a diagnosis for bad news for a challenging situation and struggle and then they're going to say well I have to learn I don't know anything about B I have to learn about I have to look for it I don't know if I feel it I don't know then you're going to start and go to the drawing board you can and many people do but you're spiritually out of shape when the challenging time comes you may not survive but if you maintain spiritual if you're spiritually we're in shape if we're spiritually strong if we're spiritually working out we're building that Bion of we're growing in our so that when that challenge comes we can endure we can engage it we can take it on then we'll be much stronger when it comes then it'll be much stronger when it comes so you talked to Brian Gab been kabacha last night this morning on his way into surgery all he's talking about is how amazing Hashem is how great hasem is and how amazing everything is and look how they're able to it's in a place of the brain they could take the whole thing out again they can reect the whole thing hasm amazing I love Hashem you're like are you for real now if you know Brian he is for real that's that's him but he does not talk in that way because really he never knew who Hashem was and now he has this horrible thing so he discovered Hashem yesterday he's able to talk that way because that's what he's been working on and who he's been for his whole life so we don't know what the future will bring we don't know and I don't mean to sound negative we also have a lot of BR and a lot of amazing things and great things that are going on we have a lot of challenges in our community right now but for everyone who reminds me of that as if I need reminding I tell them we also have more 90y olds in our community than we've ever had more babies being born more Simas being celebrated more Torah being learned more being performed not to suggest that it equals it out it's not a trade-off a diagnosis of a young person for someone hitting their 90s it's not a trade-off whatsoever but my point is there's more of a complete picture and we have to see Hashem and feel connected to Hashem so hopefully the future brings only and Longevity and and the best of absolutely everything but you know what even for those for whom it does some of those very people in their 90s are cing and moaning and this hurts and that hurts and I say to them like what do you think the parts have a guarantee forever like what do you want you want what's the alternative this hurts I said would you wait would you rather it not hurt because for it to not hurt this morning when you woke up it would mean you weren't here right I'm not giving mus to the 90y olds I'm just saying those parts have been working for a long time for a long time they're going to start to ache and moan and that's a br in life because you're here to feel it you're here to feel the ache and the moan there's two ways we could live life you know you could look at I was on a panel of rabbis last night at a program one of the other rabbis was describing this whole mentality of how we look at life and and where we place Sim as a decision it's not a it's not an emotion he was saying his daughter leaves her clothing all over the house so you could look at it and like my miserable children they leave their clothing I've told them a million times I can't believe it or you could stop yourself you you should teach them and hold them accountable for leaving it there but say you know what thank God I have children and thank God they have enough clothing that they could leave them all over the house and still be wearing clothing and thank God there's a house to leave it in and thank God there's a there's a hundred thank yous within the feeling of frustration so do you unpack the feeling of frustration and see all the things that were necessary to even get to that feeling you couldn't even be at my kid left the third car away that's blocking me I can't believe they always do that blah blah blah it's frustrating and you should take away the keys for a little bit but you know what you have a kid and they pass the driver's license and you can afford a third car and they haven't crashed you yet and there's a for every frustration there's a hundred things underneath it that do we have the Gratitude to be there and then be frustrated and hold the other person accountable but only in the context and only through the filter of wow look at all those things to be grateful for so please God our future is only the best but the likelihood is that we're all we all have a terminal illness we're all going to die nobody has yet overcome death so it's it's just a question of when and we pray and hope it's it's after a long time but it's it's going to come so are we going to be ready for whatever life throws our way whatever it is that throws our way in whatever area of life well if we don't work out we're not healthy like my friend who was saved by the kak minion spiritually emotionally got to exercise that we have to go through being daily daily go through that exercise of seeing see hashem's hand in history so that we can find his hand in our destiny if you see his hand in history you'll feel his hand in Destiny if you don't see it in history you're going to feel very lonely in your own destiny so in order to be prepared to be healthy to be well to be strong to endure whatever comes our way we have to be working out now and where do we work out now I'll never be embarrassed to say I believe in you please God and with God's help I always talk about my Evangelical friends when we're meeting working on something and they say Rabbi let's pray on it I say wow that's amazing I would never do that but we're supposed to be the ones who do that you ever meeting with someone you're not sure what to do you're talking to your spouse you have to make a big decision you say I don't know what to do you know what let's take a moment and let's pray it let's ask let's ask Hashem to give us some wisdom some guidance help him to direct us help him to give us some some clarity we know anybody who does that we're we're Torah Jews that's supposed to be dripping off of our lips it's supposed to be who we are I'm not embarrassed because in you is my trust is my faith it's up to you will we have the strength to say Hashem I trust in you whatever the outcome is for a reason when we have to we'll determine on whether we've been practicing have we been going to the gym or have we fallen out of shape so being is that puts us into the gym and gets us ready so we're up to the Bays we're going to pick up from here hasem next week Thursday not Wednesday but Thursday is is this I'm going to turn the recording off and we can debate this ourselves but