Part 144: Serenity Now

B I want to thank our sponsors for our Amun the series for the year Dr zi and Bella Morgan who sponsored in memory of our dear friend Brian galet baru Nan who was a model and an inspiration and continues every day to inspire us with the way he lived his life and the way he lived this world both of them with unwavering amuna in Hashem I also want to thank sponsors of today Kanan and Sh sponsoring a memory of shir's Grandmother roas Iran carel who just passed away recently a holocaust Survivor a woman of extraordinary resiliency and faith and our learning should be to elevate her soul and lastly today sponsored this just in from Rita ruin and really all of us our dear friend Sam ruin is having surgery right now scheduled surgery yahushua Bena it should go well and you should have a speedy and a complete Ru we have been studying together a beautiful piece um by called your trying to Define and trying to inspire and motivate further B who doesn't need B who doesn't need a little bit more faith during this time I saw a fascinating Study last night uh that track different religions whether Corona virus and the pandemic has increased faith has had no change to Faith or has decreased faith and it's interesting that in other religions it has increased Faith there's a large number uh but the Jewish people we've essentially remained the same I think only 7% say it's increased their faith and the overwheling majority feel it's the same and there's a a lot of ways to interpret that data why the Jewish people are so to say unimpressed or unmoved by this particular crisis maybe because we've seen and we've lived through and we've survived many before that this one of course not for the people directly affected God forbid but those for whom being affected means being at home this is not the worst crisis that we've been through there's a lot of ways to interpret this data but who doesn't need amuna who doesn't need greater faith in this time so we've spend their time defining what is is this B how is it that you live a life with a greater sense of mindfulness or presence of the almighty his hand resting on our shoulder his guiding and curating and choreographing Our Lives leaning on him for support feeling a gratitude for all that happens you woke up this morning and you're here with me on this technology and at least for now it's all flowing and it is all uh streaming seamlessly what gifts that we have this remarkable weather it's May and it's been beautiful outside at least here in South Florida how extraordinary and what a blessing that was unexpected during this time is absolutely everywhere if you look for him and when you look you see and when you see you feel and when you feel and that's our topic for today you're filled with a greater sense of Serenity and Tranquility who doesn't need that who doesn't need that even when you think that your C cool collect on the outside like the duck flowing along the top of the water it's paddling like medad underneath that water I recently was talking to my dentist I said when are you reopening I need to make an appointment I'm having a problem with a gap between my tooth and he looked at me and he said he was passing by I saw him at a healthy social distance and he said to me I hate to tell you Rabbi but you know why you're having that problem because you're grinding your teeth in your sleep you think your calm cool collect on the outside you think you got it together you think you have such a Muna you think everything is so amazing you think you can absorb and take it all he didn't say all this I'm paraphrasing he said but when you close your eyes and you fall asleep you're subconscious you're grinding your teeth because you're anxious who's not anxious who's not anxious to get back to life who's not anxious to go on who's not anxious to pick up where we left off who's not anxious to resume life the way we knew it who's not anxious about whether we and the people we love will remain healthy who's not anxious about their finances and the economy who's not anxious about a million and one things so how do we achieve a sense of Serenity and peace how can we make sure not to grind our teeth while we're sleeping or while we're awake how can we set how can we discover a level of a and that is our topic for today so we've Define b as walking into the situation and knowing it's stacked in our favor that you don't have to feel that you're confronting there is no tension there's no friction there's no conflict if you look at our external lives we wake up every day and it's defined by conflict I don't want to get out of bed am I going to eat the right thing and will I behave the right way and what will the news be telling me and will the world cooperate with me and will my family fall in line and will everything flow easily we are lives from when we wake up till we go to sleep are filled with conflict but if you live with then you live your inner self if you Chann that inner voice if you look through that inner lens then you see a world of Harmony and Tranquility you see a world which is choreographed by the great Puppeteer who's pulling the strings the almighty Theon sh so let's continue there's a lot more we've said in the past we've reviewed it several times let's continue the author explains as follows listen to this quotee and again I apologize you don't know the sources but I'll Translate and try to read slowly and clearly the essence of a life of is the peace and the serenity of the B how do you know what is the measure or metric to determine whether in fact you are successfully living a life of does it translate to you having calm do you have peace a person who's frantic and Scattered a person who's flustered a person who's worried a person who's anxious they may have lip service of they may say they may know how to pay lip service to Faith and but if you're flustered and you're anxious and you're angry if you're running and you're if you have no calm and no peace and serenity if you're not able to accept hashem's will and the world after you've done your initiative then you may think that you're living with B but it's superficial it's only on your lips the measure the metric to evaluate whether it's in fact in your heart are you successfully tapping into living with is the whether the the one who's supposed to have the in fact has come peace have it together so the way to know whether you have is do you have peace do you have Serenity and does your heart trust the One You're supposed to be putting your faith in that they will do what is right in the manner that you're UST to them not will they do what you want if you only trust and you look for the person the being in this case God to do exactly what you want then you're not trusting in Him you're trusting in whom in yourself you're trusting in your evaluation and your analysis and what you want the world to be and then you say God here's the deal I know you're the omnipotent infinite all knowing god and I'm just this finite pathetic NE life but I tell you what here's what I think should happen and I'd like you to conform I'd like you to make the world react and fit to exactly the way I drew it up God I want my husband my wife my children to say to do to act to look exactly like this I want the stock market to react like this I want the pandemic I want the governor I want the president I want the task force to do exactly like this so God here I have I have trust that you'll do exactly what I want I have trust you'll get me that girl I've trust you'll get me that car I've trust you'll help me get that watch and that job I trust that you'll do exactly what I want in whom are you trust not God yourself your own analysis your own uh your own view of the world that's not that's not trust in him that's arrogance that's ego that's asking the omnipotent all knowing perfect God to in fact conform and submit and mold himself into you that's backwards that's not what we believe God forbid B is God I put my trust and faith in you that I've taken my initiative I've given my all I've done everything I could and now I trust that however it will turn out is in my best interest I trust that you will do what is right and if I can put my trust in you that it'll come out however it's meant to be then what do I have to worry about what do I have to be afraid of what do I have to be anxious about what do I have to be angry or jealous about my trust is in you Hashem if I miss the flight I missed the flight I left on time it wasn't my fault it was a supernatural act and if the world I'm taking all my precautions I'm following all my guidelines and whatever is going to happen it is what's meant to happen it has been orchestrated from above and therefore not only do I not have anything to worry about I can walk with confidence with my head held high and ultimately with a sense of calm and serenity that it's all going to happen the way it's meant to be and therefore I'm good to go so the defines is the measure of the metric when we're done today take your B pulse take your B temperature and what is the thermometer what is is the mechanism to take your pulse or temperature measure your are you frantic are you frazzled are you losing you're cool is your are you moody are you anxious you have to ask yourself how's your B are you calm and Serene and tranquil and today Wednesday May 6th today ER what is what do I have to do today I'm going to do what I have to do and I'm gonna do the best I have to do and whatever life throws me after that it's what's meant to be calm cool collect it's going to be an amazing day today is going to be a great day every day is going to be a great day because I have because I have Hashem in my life how do you achieve that how do you get there is it that you listen to Goldberg Wednesday mornings and it's that simple that carries you that charges you for the entire week oh I was going to get anxious Friday Sunday Monday but I have to make it to Wednesday and that reminds me don't get anxious it's that easy don't get anxious no no how do you get to that place when you live your life there is no opposition there's no friction there are no obstacles as we've been developing from rwz not that I wake up and I'm fighting the world and I'm battling every moment of the day but I wake up and I realize I have nothing to fight I wake up and I realize that it's all flowing seamlessly it's from Hashem does that mean that it's all going to go right in the way I want no God forbid people get sick and their financial challenges and there's friction with people but it means whatever I face I have the strength whatever I I face I have the resiliency whatever I face I have the love and support of Hashem whatever I face it's what I meant to face to help me realize and become the person I meant to be so when I wake up and I begin my day knowing there is no his nagdas there's no opposition there is no opposition party imagine you're you're a a um candidate and there's no opponent there's no opposition if you have an opp an opponent and there's an opposition party then you're having to convene your campaign team and you're having to strategize and you're having to raise money and you're having to fight you're having to but if you wake up and you have no opponent you're good to go you're pretty confident on Election Day when there's no other name on the ballot it's a pretty sure thing that you're going to come out the winner we have no opposition there is no opponent there is no there is no opposition uh in the government there is no one we have to campaign against we know that we're on the ballot we're going to come out how does it look when we come out that's up to Hashem but we're able to live with a level of when you're occupied when you're filled in a state of War of battling how do you have peace you're battling your diet you're battling your exercise you're battling to learn you're battling to D with kavana you're battling your spouse you're battling your children you're battling work you're battling the stock market you're battling the environment you're battling nature you're battling Corona virus all you do is Battle I don't know about you if I battled all day and we do battle all day you collapse of exhaustion at the end of the day you're AATA you're a gourish you're nothing you're battling homeschooling and you're battling having no housekeeping ER having cut down on the housekeeper and you're battling having Frozen your spending to what is uh to what is essential and you're battling it's exhausting you're battling living on top of people that you weren't meant to spend 24/7 with you're battling finding yourself in rolls that you were not designed to do you're battling every moment of the day so by the end of that day you're AATA you're exhausted it's as if you've been hit by and then run over several times by an 18-wheeler tractor trailer shuck you're exhausted but if you live life with I'm not battling anything ah it's a different role it's uncomfortable it's inconvenient it's awkward I'm not battling it's where I'm meant to be I'm not battling with the economy and figuring out how I'll pay the bills it's what I'm meant to be doing I'm not battling the fact that I have to homeschool and 17 different devices and is the Wi-Fi going to be working and will the kid cooperate and is the teacher and I'm not battling this is all what I meant to face today and I walk into that day with B with calm and serenity and Tranquility I'm going to do my best and I'm going to take my initiative and I'm going to live my life the best version of myself and after that going to sit back if you have one of these chairs you can literally sit back I'm going to sit back with hasem take it away the rest is up to you there is no I'm not battling battling I'm proud to tell you that in this coron virus pandemic I've tried to be very careful with my eating habits trying to be healthy especially now and I've lost a bunch of weight but you know what someone I won't mention who it's possible I married her almost 23 years ago bought my kryptonite into the house she went to Trader Joe's and she got the corn chips have you eaten the corn chips from Trader Joe's those things are unbelievable I don't care how disciplined and Vigilant I don't care how good your mindset I don't care how much you've been winning the battles those corn chips come in the home I told her it's like you just put alcohol in front of an alcoholic it's like you gave an addict exactly what they're addicted to she meant well she's trying to help test me and help me become the best version of myself it's not her fault it's a it's all on me so I had a bad day bag of corn chips from Trader Joe's gave in despite all the progress I had made so do you beat yourself up do you say I lost that battle so therefore I'm a neb I'm a nothing what's the point I might as well gain it all back I might as well give in and eat unhealthy again or you say no with with I lost that battle but you know what I'm going back to realize for whatever reason that was meant to be I had a a brain freeze and I lost my capacity to fight and I made a mistake what do I learn from it was it late at night and I shouldn't have opened the cabinet because When You're vulnerable and you're hungry for the Munch whatever you learn from it don't do it again but have a that today's going to be a great day and today I'm going to have the power today I'm going to get through this is our goal this is our goal you want to live a long life you want to live a happy life you want to live a spiritual life you want your relationships to be rich in life then you need because nobody wants to be around and nobody wants to get along with somebody who's frazzled who's angry who's anxious who's Moody who's reactive you want to get along with somebody who's calm cool and collect no matter what and in all circumstances it's what we're craving it's what we want for ourselves and it's what we want to see in others and the answer is in our hands the answer is understand submit forfeit relinquish turn to Hashem I'm going to take my initiative I'm going to do my best I'm going to do everything I have to do I'm going to put those corn trips behind lock and key a combination that I won't have I'm going to take all my initiative and everything I have to do and afterwards I'm going to let go and let God there is no battling there's no M there's no war in my life because when I'm battling when there's war it is taking away my for the Jewish people when they entered the land seven years of conquest and seven years of settling and then they had Manuka so we too we have to battle but afterwards when we battle and we earn this attitude and mentality of amuna so I want to come back to something R Schwarz told us previously that amuna is not a momentary decision amuna is not a behavior amuna is a mindset is not a a an act and is not even a character trait is a mindset it's a perspective it's a vision and a view of the world when I look at the world through my glasses then all I see is peace tranquility and Harmony in the universe I see Hashem doing things exact exctly the way they're meant to be but if I take off my glasses and I look at a world all I see is friction all I see is fighting all I see is battling and I wonder will I have what I need will I have what it takes to get through root the core the P if you want to measure the metric do you have do you have do you have peace do you have serenity I don't know about you we might be living in the same world sometimes you have this in fact sometimes this can create some conflict even within a home where one of the spouse one of the parties in the home has no problem remaining calm cool collect putting their trust in Hashem going with the flow ruling with the punches adjusting flexible whatever needs to happen and the other is high strong and type A and anxious and micromanaging and controls everything and flies off the handle and is always frazzled and and worried and now you have friction between the two you have friction between the two but if you want to enter a world of k a world where there is no battling then you simply wake up and you say there's no problem so the one who always is worried and anxious says to the other why are you always so calm it's so aggravating it's so angering it's so annoying how come you're always rolling with the punches how come you're always so calm why aren't you anxious and the answer is because I trust I'm doing what we have to do I'm taking our initiative and beyond that I'm not going to lose my blood pressure I'm not going to Lo gain diabetes I'm not going to have autoimmune disorder I'm not going to have mental health illness I'm not going to pause cause pressure on my relationships a person who if you can live with a perspective and a world view If You Can Craft your Life and lifestyle to be a place where there is no battle there are no Wars there is no friction then you're living in a place Shak that is all that is all peace and quiet so at first glance when you read the statement of the of the you say yeah you know when you have when everything's going well when hasem provides everything you need when everything works out the way you want it to that's when you have peace and serenity but that's not what the us means what means is you know how you can have you don't need when everything's going well when everything is smooth sailing and everything is amazing you got to skip in your step you're Whistling Dixie you got you're dancing the kazka when everything's going well you don't need someone to teach you life is fantastic when your portfolio is flying high when you've made a ton of money when you've come back from an amazing family vacation when you have love love and romance in the air when the doctor tells gives you a clean Bill a health when everything's going fantastic you don't need to work on it's simple when do you need it it's when things are not going well when it feels like something is missing when you need to compensate when you need to dig deep and figure out how can I live with peace and serenity even when it feels like even when it feels like I'm missing so much that's when it's needed that's when it's needed in fact the same the same writes in his he describes there was a I'm reading to you from the there was one of the lived in the 11th century in Spain so when he talks about the he doesn't mean the students of the B who wear the fuzzy furry hats he means the the early Pious people that one of the would say in their daving every day in their ding they would say is another name for God Hashem save me spare me what is scattering fragmenting of my soul what is so he gives an answer this is and in fact one of the commentaries on the mishna quotes this when the mishna says the more things you have the more worry you have the more things can go wrong the more things you have to take care of and the writes the more things you have the more you have to worry someone's going to steal or Rob them maybe somebody's going to kill you for them so this that the the alludes to says I have many things so my brain is scattered I'm worried I'm thinking about them I'm very concerned about them and therefore my whole day I'm never fully mindful I'm never fully present I'm never fully focused I never have because my mind is what a beautiful me spare me from being so fragmented and divided so fearful and so anxious and instead Hashem Supply me give me a give me a sense of peace and a sense of Serenity give me a sense of of confidence and calm that you are in my life and therefore I have nothing to fear I have nothing to worry when do we tap into this when do we experience this so he can I'm back in R Schwarz when do we tap into this I want to just tell you a great a great quote from uh Mark Twain Mark Twain one said I have known a great many troubles but most of them never happened I've known a great many troubles but most of them never happened is that not a description of the Jewish psyche I've known a great many troubles we we forfeit and concede our own happiness our own Serenity our own relationships for the many troubles that never happened but what if and what will be and why everyone knows you know my favorite joke you all know my favorite joke I've told it many many times but you're kind so you're those uh who have their screens on will laugh anyway you all know my favorite joke the Italian says I'm tired and I'm thirsty I must have a glass of wine the Russian says I'm tired and I'm thirsty I must have a glass of vodka and the Americans says I'm tired and I'm thirsty I must have a glass of soda and the the Irish say I'm tired and I'm thirsty I must have a glass of scotch and the Jew says I'm tired and I'm thirsty I must have diabetes everybody knows that one right and why is that hilarious like any good joke because it rings true everyone else says I'm tired and I'm thirsty I'm going to get a drink the juice says I'm tired I'm thirsty our mind takes us immediately to the worst I'm tired and I'm thirsty I must have diabetes Mark Twain I've known a great many troubles but most of them never happened so many of these troubles were manufactured in our mind we create and manufacture problems that don't even exist and are unlikely to ever come to fruition you want that Serenity you want that peace you want that happiness you want that Health mental physical emotional and spiritual it's all in that one word how is our mindset how do we live our lives what are the glasses we see do we think that we're in control do we micromanage do we go into this this power struggle with God or do we concede that I'm going to do my best I'm going to take my initiative I'm going to let go I'm going to let God the rest Hashem is up to you you're in charge what am I worried about I'm doing my best and after that it's all up to you I have nothing to we to fear I have nothing to worry now Schwarz tells us we all tap into this we have access to this we experience this one day a week when is it that's right shabas KES shabas KES shabas is called Y in ouros in our daving how do we refer to shabas as y it is a day of peace a day of Serenity why we shabas is a day of Manuka in what way is it Manuka for the person who has to cook clean serve it's not such a day of Manuka for the person who has to watch the little kids without the help of Technology not such a day of Manuka so how do you define Manuka Manuka doesn't necessarily mean a day of rest physically what Mana means is for 25 hours we take our problems and we put them up on the Shelf from when I like candles till Friday afternoon to I light the havdala candle on Mo shabas I have a 25-hour place of ref Refuge I have a 25h hour break I have 25 hours of calm that's why we call shabas I'll give you a little Shameless plug every Friday at 6 PM we get together on Zoom YouTube live if you're watching on YouTube live please subscribe to the channel every Friday we get together right now while sh will still closed at 6 pm. for 15 minutes have turned Friday into AR of shabas we try to charge the moment we go into shabus not frazzled and not last minute and not rushed but with a mindset of what chabas is going to be and never we've created a WhatsApp group that you can join where every Friday morning you'll wake up to a message a very short message about how to turn Friday into Arab shabas join that WhatsApp group so what are the message that we're constantly talking about that chabas is it's a 25h hour refuge and reprieve six days a week I'm tied to the news I'm tied to the data I'm tied to the curve I'm tied to the statistics I'm tied to the guidelines I'm tied to what's going to be and one day a week I disconnect to connect to my root to my core to my health to return to rejuvenate to restore one day a week 25 hours lighting the candles Friday till I light that havdala candle Mo shabas for 25 hours there's not a worry in the world I sing my ziros and I learn my Torah and I play my board games and I tell my jokes and I laugh and whether I'm by myself doing all of those things or I have others around me I'm able to tap into 25 hours I read I sleep it's 25 hours of Serenity ah what about all the to do I got to do the laundry and I got to do the dishes and I got to check the news and got to worry about how I'm going to pay the bills it will all be waiting for you Mo shabas all that will be there Mo shabas 25 hours I actually try to go through the exercise of a mental mindset that Friday a shabas begins I take all those problems I take them out of my head and I put them up on a shelf and I won't look at it and I won't think about it and in fact we learned from a PK in yesah that we're not allowed you're not allowed to talk about on chabas you can't talk about those things on chabas we've been challenging ourselves in the Goldberg Hall home to try to make it through shabas meals without saying the word coron virus Co pandemic a list of words you're not allowed to say not allowed to say not because we're foolish and it doesn't exist not because we violate guidelines on shabas as if somehow shabas will protect you but because that's a v it's a weekday topic we don't talk about that the stock market or the economy those are not shabas topics shabas topics are are light and laughter and fun they are thought-provoking and thought stimulating shabas topics are meaning and things that will bind us together not drive us apart things that we have in common not the things that divide us talk about not shabas talk about chabas topics and put together a list of rules hang it on your on the wall of your home let everybody Buy in these are the words we don't use and these are the topics that we can talk about and shabas for 25 hours our blood pressure is going to come down for 25 hours our immune system is going to recover for 25 hours we're not going to grind our teeth in our sleep for 25 hours nothing is wrong because it is it's a taste of the world to come and that is the meaning and the definition of why shabas is synonymous chabas is y it is a day of peace and it's a day of rest because everything I just described imagine peace and rest from the laundry the shopping the disinfectant it's a piece of rest from the bills and the finances and the pandemic and the News That's I'm not lacking anything I'm not missing anything you know on a weekday three times a day is how long 19as three at the beginning of Praise three at the end of gratitude 13 in the middle request Basha Hashem give me knowledge give me Health give me Justice give me Redemption give me give me give me please please please I need I need I need shabas is not 19as how long is it seven the same three at the beginning of praise the same three at the end of gratitude and how many in the middle not 13 of needs one Braes one the number seven is completion it's wholeness it's a unit it's the creation of the world during the week I have all these needs but chabas seven long one in the middle no request no needs in fact the is on shabas you're not allowed to ask for your needs there's a whole literature and discussion how can we say when you're not allowed to ask for your needs for another time but you're not allowed to insert into your daving your own needs on shabas why because shabas Were Meant to feel I have no needs I'm whole I have everything I need one day a week so you'll say it's pretend it's make believe it's not real I do have needs why am I pretending because I need to live in that world in order to know which is the real world of make believe and which is the reality the one in which I have needs are the one in which I Feel Complete and so one day a week I put it all up on the shelf and I'm able to tap into and I'm able to fill and I'm able to live with beautiful sayz don't promise US that if you live with andab then you'll make and you'll turn on the news and it'll turn out everything's the way you wanted it to be it turns out that the world conformed to your will that's not what it means that if you live shabas properly you have Manuka what it means is what it means is the man of shabas is despite the fact that during the world it may not be the week it may not be exactly the way you want for 25 hours it's 25 hours it's a taste of the world to come it's a taste of the world the way it could and the way it will be we'll go on maybe we'll pick up with this next time but I'll end by telling you this the says that the whole week long have the status of keeping chabas all week what does that mean they don't do the 39 acts of creative labor all week long that's not what it means what it means is exactly this the the calm the peace the confidence that results from knowing that Hashem is in charge they they're able to experience not just one day a week on shabas they're able to tap into an experience each and every day the righteous live with that Comm and that confidence regularly and so can you and so can we we can we can and we must I made a one minute motivation video back in the days we were allowed to be together we'll get back to them I was uh had the privilege of being in a plane that I was able to get in the cockpit and I did a one minute motivation video on are you the pilot or are you the passenger we have a choice in our own life are you the pilot or are you the passenger if you're the passenger you know you're putting your destiny in the hands of others are you the pilot controlling your life to be the pilot of your life means take my initiative and then I choose to live with Manuka if you're the passenger you see battles you see turbulence you see bad weather you see delays and there's nothing you can do about it but if you choose to be the pilot pilot of your own life there is no turbulence and there is no bad weather and there is no delays you're the pilot choose to look out Through a Windshield that all you see is look through the windshield of look through the windshield that you'll do what you need to do today you'll take your initiative you'll make your effort we'll do everything we need to do today but once we do that we let go and we let God and then we'll discover the Manuka this is not an momentary act and it's not a quality it's a lifestyle it's a filter it's a vision it's a perspective with which we view the world and I promise you this is the EFM Goldberg guarantee that if we work on this together it will transform Our lives our relationships will improve our physical mental health spiritual health will all measurably improve you'll go to sleep at night with a calm you'll have more energy at the end of the day you'll say wow where' that come from why do I feel so calm right now because I've trained myself that rather than we react with rather than react being scattered and fragmented and scrambled rather than react with fear and worry and anxiety I've trained myself to look at the world with calm it's the way it's meant to be I can roll with the punches I can be flexible to whatever Hashem has in plan has in store for me today I can't wait to find out with a sense of chabas have a y even today on this Wednesday and each and every day peace happiness be happy be holy be healthy have a great day