Part 141: Sometimes You Have to Cover Your Eyes to See Hashem

good morning Boker to to all thank you so much for being with us and continuing our study of amuna and our growth in amuna together so honored to have this group and to be together and to be working on this together I want to thank our generous sponsors for this year drors Avi and Bella Morgan who sponsored our Amun for this year in memory of our dear and beloved friend Rabbi Dr Brian gabbit I mentioned last week I'll mention again that Brian's life was filled with amuna not just in the good and joyous and happy and successful and triumphant times but he remains our incredible role model worthy of our emulation because of the outstanding extraordinary extraordinary amuna he had in the challenging and difficult times to the very end of his life through tremendous suffering he nevertheless never stopped saying Hashem is amazing everything is great everything is amazing and he gives us that power he reminds us that we have that capability to the amuna class this morning's particular class is also sponsored by Dr Gordon and Yan in commemoration of the earth side of her beloved father hman whose should have an alyah we have been studying and living with amuna we have been working on amuna and as I mentioned last week those who've been part of this class those who've been working on this together for 140 weeks or so we've been working so that we're ready for this moment this challenging crisis time in which so many of us our faith our amuna is a little bit shaken is a little bit challenged we're looking to find Hashem where is he and why is he doing what he's doing how do we persevere and how do we endure and where can we find the resiliency to get through this moment whether our challenges are the best of challenges like having to make PES being the worst thing happening to us orom God forbid they are much more horrific challenges and we're starting to get to a point where there's almost no one who doesn't have a family member a friend an acquaintance someone they know in their Circle who has not been negatively affected or struck by this horrific pandemic and by this by this pernicious virus and so where do we find that amuna where do we find that strength we don't wait for that moment if we're trying to we have a uh crisis and we have no income and we need money if our bank account is empty we're in trouble hopefully we've been saving hopefully we've been putting aside for that rainy day hopefully we have that emergency account and the same is true with our sense of amuna in these moments hopefully we have been saving hopefully we've been making deposits hopefully we have enough that we can take from that will sustain us during this difficult time we've been learning this piece by rawz the author of The where he says does know your and he Tau us that the source of where does it come from trust in God trust in God is not this Blind Faith well I hope everything's going to be okay I want it to be okay I wish it to be okay so I'm gonna assume it's okay God's Gonna Keep I trust God God's Gonna Keep everyone around me healthy and say I trust God he's going to continue to make my parosa flow I trust God he's going to make everything happen exactly the way I want that's not it's foolishness it's that is not that's a wish list what is genuine and trust is not that I believe God will do it the way I want that's worshiping oneself not God that's asking God to conform to the reality the way you want it the way you see it that sees yourself in charge not him the whole notion of B is to conceive to submit to Forfeit to recognize he is the source of all he runs the world he controls the world world and things will happen the way he sees fit the way he choreographs the way he writes it up the way he thinks is best for all of us are accepting that and receiving that our willingness to even Embrace that and recognize that that is the core of so how do we do that how do you do that when we're living in a time and in a world where it's so difficult to rec reconcile our reality with our trust and belief in him how do you reconcile a good kind compassionate just God with terrible things happening to people yesterday alone two of our members began sitting shiva for losing a sibling two of our older members lost a sibling and in each case their sibling one week ago was healthy healthy and struck by a virus that in one week ended their life out of nowhere how do we reconcile how do we make sense of such a God and I don't have an answer to that question the ultimate loss the ultimate tragedy is one that none of us have answers to and anyone who claims they can explain why or have answers to is themselves playing God that is an ex expression of heresy but we do understand is says of Schwarz there are two realities we're living in simultaneously what he calls the external superficial and what he calls the internal authentic the external reality is defined in our world as a place of tension and conflict the external reality from the moment I wake up don't be lazy don't stay in bed don't eat the wrong thing don't say the wrong thing don't look at the wrong thing don't go to the wrong place don't act the wrong way don't feel the wrong feeling from the moment I wake up my life I'm confronting tension I'm battling to do the right thing be the right person be my best self that's the external sense of self I'm battling to make my parnasa these difficult times I'm battling to abide by the precautions and the rules I'm battling to avoid getting the illness myself I'm battling to come up with the right policies everyone's battling from the moment we wake up till the moment we fall asleep the external sense of self is engaged in a NeverEnding conflict and and that's the reality of the world that's where we break through that's life itself but sayar of Schwarz there's an internal reality and in that internal reality in that place of godliness within me in the place of of true trust in hasem then everything in the world comes together in Perfect Harmony there is no conflict and there is no tension there are no battles and there is no friction it's all Harmony it's all the will of the almighty it's all the will of Hashem and the word when he says comes from the word that that Ley entered the city bet when they had stacked the odds in their favor when they knew the outcome even before it happened when they knew it would fall in a way which was good for them that was bet they had confidence they had shorty they had absolute knowledge what it means to live with B is to go into life and say I know that God has my back so whatever happens it's in my favor it's what's meant to be it's what's right for me I go into every situation and I do my all and I try my hardest and I take all the initiative I need to but once I've done that I lean back and I let go and I let God and I say my internal sense of self has peace and Tranquility because there is a Harmony to the universe and there's a Harmony to my life I'm not going to worry I'm not going to fear I'm not going to be filled with angst particularly about the things I can't control because worry anxiety and fear never made anything better never made problems go away only worse made us sick and lowered our immune system and compromised and forfeited whatever happiness and peace we had left so therefore the core the root the goal of a life of says rwar says the is not just saying I have everything's going to be okay I've my will come I've everyone will be healthy I've this is going to go away I've is not a wish list B is a mindset it's a perspective it's a filter it's a pair of glasses that we wear in which we look at our world and we say rather than see a world filled with conflict and tension and battling and challenge I live in and I see a world that's filled with Harmony and peace and godliness that's dictated and organized orchestrated and choreographed by the one above who knows better than not only anyone else but everyone else combined so let's continue with this piece you have to know that living this life of living a life of relationship with God and trust with God and a calmness and a Serenity and a peace of mind that says listen whatever comes my way I'll deal with it I'll deal with it because if it weren't meant to be it wouldn't happen and whatever happens it was meant to be it was meant for me to to have to deal with so this is not just lip service it's not just rhetoric it's not simply platitudes that we pronounce you know they don't just drip from our lips like it's what we're supposed to say it's not just something that you say to get through the proper approach for a simple Jew precious simple Jews who are trying to arouse and awaken within themselves this best part of themselves you see when we are living with fear and angst and anxiety when we're living with tension right now this is a very difficult time we're on top of one another there's frustration there's disappointment there's worry there are people who are going out of their minds they want to get out of their house they want to interact with other people we're living in this time where people are losing their cool and their patience people are blowing up in Anger frustration there's a sense of Envy for those who have it different than they do all of the worst possible character traits within someone are under an enormous magnifying glass called Corona virus Corona virus is holding a magnifying glass to each and every one of us and it's bringing out or it's amplifying it's magnifying what could be our best qualities or what could be our worst qualities it said I'm putting you Under One Roof in one house I'm telling you you can't go out I'm severely restricting and confining your lives get along let's see what comes out the best of you or the worst of you do you look the other way are you quick to forgive are you quick to help out are you quick to judge others favorably are you a m are you willing to forgo when things happen are you happy with what you have or envious of others are you sharing what you have or you are simply keeping everything to yourself This episode this pandemic this crisis is a magnifying glass and it's shining down on all of us to be able to promote and to be able to magnify either our best qualities or our worst there is within every one of us a best quality a pin a simple holy Jewish spark that is connected to and that believes in the almighty the Reon there is the godliness in us that says even in these moments when I don't understand and sometimes when I can't see nevertheless I trust I know that everything that happens is for a reason I don't believe in Randomness and chance I don't believe in happen stance I don't believe in statistics and data I believe in them of course I don't believe in them as in pure random statistics and data but everything is guided from above how could it be How could a human being a sophisticated intelligent human being be looking at the world today and not recognize that there is a creator that none of this is coincidental but it's by Design how could it be the world has turned upside down radically different than any of us lived it a month ago and in ways that if a month ago I told you this is where we'll be a month from now none of you none of you whatever platform you're listening or engaged to us with right now if I told you this a month ago zero none of you would have believed me none none of you and yet here we are with an upside down world something that's affecting the entire Globe I saw a picture yesterday a meme which really affected me it wasn't a funny one it was a picture of the entire Globe Mother Earth wearing a mask wearing a mask and it just it it struck me this is a global Universal human challenge this is not affecting a Township or a city or a state or a country or a region or a continent this is global is there a more poignant direct message from God that this is him now I'm not going to get into the the business of I don't believe in it why would God do this that's playing God that to me is heretical there is only one God and we are not he so why is he doing this maybe in our lifetimes we'll find out likely we won't the question is not Lama why is he doing it but LMA for what what can we take from it what can we learn from it what can we learn from it I published an article this morning on my website it'll be on as soon about the difference between what's essential and non-essential and here in Baton as of this past weekend we had a stay home order and the order said you're only allowed to leave for essential activity and it went on to Define what's essential versus non-essential most of the essentials we would all agree Provisions food to be able to care for your pet if you're a home Aid you're helping an olderly person medical professionals we would all agree they had liquor stores as being essential which is a interesting observation on Humanity but essential versus non-essential and one of the things that strikes me about this entire episode in pandemic is I think it causes all of us to examine our lives and ask what is essential and what's not essential what did we used to define as essential and we've come to learn as not essential and what did we think was not essential maybe like coming to sh regularly that we've learned to realize is essential and how bereft we are without it what's essential and what is not essential there are many lessons of Lama what can we LMA what can we take from it but we shouldn't get stuck and Paralyzed by asking Lama why which is a question we'll never have an answer to so deep within every one of us at this time we're being asked to shine that magn magnifying glass on it is that holy spark the pent that Holy simple Soul that's connected to God and that knows that this is from him and that nothing happens by chance or by Randomness and that even though we all must take every precaution we can that is our responsibility that is Our obligation when we've done it when all is said and done when we've done what we can and what we must we have to let go and we have to realize it's up to him so it says says the precious holy Jew who are Awakening to the significance of this moment to work who want to work on the sense of trust within us we know you sit and you study's Monumental work the duties of the heart and one of its most famous sections the gate called the Gate of trust and then you begin your conversation with god then you begin that ation you know we did a Shear a few weeks right before this whole thing broke out which in some ways was timely about hisus how to live how to be alone how to not only not be tortured by being alone but how to crave and how to Great the most out of being alone hisus simply put the ability to recognize it's just me and God it's just me and Hashem and in that context to start a conversation Hashem is our best friend talk to him unburden yourself on him lean on him be supported by him feel his loving embra Embrace feel his loving Embrace and talk to him he's right there he has a de he's right down here in the world with us he's accessible to us he's not only in sh he is right now in each and every one of our homes that we have transformed into miniature shs and miniature butes and just talk to him talk to him you can protest him AR ainu did AR our forefather set a precedent for us when he taught us you can challenge God when you think that God is doing something unjust or unfair challenge him ask him why why protest him and say do it differently I think that there's something at the end if he doesn't one has to concede to him but in the meantime he's almost asking us inviting us protest what I'm doing show me you care show me you believe and know that I'm the one doing it talk to me talk to me we have that ability he gives an example I know God that back on rash and ELO and the gates were closing and I was crying I know that then you determined how much parasa I would make this year so on the one hand you could say God I know you determined on how much I'm going to make I don't have to try I don't have to exert effort I don't have to get up off the couch why am I trying to make a parasa it was already determined if I do nothing I'll make X and if I overwork if I'm a workaholic if I never see my family if I neglect my own health because I'm working insane hours I'll make the same thing because after all is not exactly what you determined for me to make that's what a person is tempted to want to say however Ms on the one hand there's a truth to that if a person is living with a reality that there is God and that he determines all that's going to happen then where's the room for our initiative however but that's not a genuine or authentic sense of it's counterfeit that is a counterfeit expression you're just trying to benefit from the fruit of aah you're trying to say well I have such trust in you God I live with such a an absolute knowledge and a consciousness of your presence in my life that therefore I don't need to do anything therefore I can take risks therefore I can be passive what we're supposed to work on is entirely different is not God I'm not going to go to work because I know you already determined my parnasa God I'm going to take risks with my health because I know you already decided whether I'm going to contract the virus God I'm going to that's not it's foolishness it's counterfeit it's a cop out is God I'm going to do everything I'm meant to do I'm asked to do I'm responsible to do right they say pray like it's all up to God but work like it's all up to you I'm going to do everything that I have to do but once I've done what I have to do I'm putting on my pair of glasses called without my pair of glasses I look at the world and I see that is a function of me it's a result of my free will I take credit when it works out and I'm to blame when it fails and I look at a world that's filled with Randomness and chance and coincidence without my pair of glasses I see there are people who hurt me because they're bad people and they hurt me and I seek revenge without my pair of glasses I look what others have and I say that's not fair I deserve it and I feel a sense of Envy without my pair of glances I look at the world and I say look how much I've accomplished look who I am and I inflate with a sense of arrogance but I put on my pair of glasses called and now I look at an entirely different world I see a world not with objects in my way not with battles I have to confront not with conflicts I have to fight I see a world not filled with tension I see a world that is defined by Harmony Hashem I look around this is all you you are the Chess Master you are the Puppeteer you are orchestrating everything from above when I wear that filter when I put out that pair of glasses when I enter that perspective that mindset when I live in that reality the internal view the internal reality that it's all you then you know what I see somebody who hurt me I say I'm not going to focus and concentrate on that Wicked person I'm not going to seek revenge which is prohibited I'm going to realize that they could not have hurt me unless that was God's will there's a lesson for me to learn when I see what someone else has I'm not going to feel a sense of Envy I deserve it I want it I wish it I should have it I'm going to say everything makes sense they have what they deserve and need and I'm getting what I deserve what I need what's allocated to me from above when I see my own accomplishments and CHS I'm not going to feel oo that's me I'm so special I'm not going to inflate with arrogance I'm going to recognize that the senior partner in every one of my Endeavors the almighty above it couldn't happen and it wouldn't take place without without him and his partnership B is not a platitude it's not rhetoric it's not a statement you don't just say is not how hard you Shuckle or how long you DAV are whether you're living life with your glasses do you wake up in the morning and put on your glasses now here's an interesting metaphor that I just thought of so I had lasc surgery several years ago but before now I'm just old as you could tell I'm just old so I need these things and when I used to just record this on audio nobody knew how old I am but now that we do all this on the technology platforms you all get a direct perspective to see what an old man I've become so I had lasc surgery when I was younger I had terrible terrible prescription when I woke up in the morning I would fumel to find my glasses and without it I couldn't recognize somebody 2 feet away in front of my face so what happened without my glasses I was BL blind without my glasses I could barely see without my glasses I thought I knew what was in front of me but nothing was an accurate picture of what I was seeing and with my glasses now I saw the reality now I saw the truth but there was that choice back in that day I could either not wear the glasses and make my way through life trying to pretend that I can see things clearly and accurately or I could put on the glasses and now I have a clear picture once I had lasc surgery then now I don't even need to wake up without the glasses and if I go swimming or I play basketball or I'm in the shower or I'm falling asleep or waking up I don't have to reach for glasses the lastic surgery was a correction to the lens that enabled me to see clearly all the time that's a life of B that is exactly what R Schwarz is saying B is not a pair of glasses that you put on be or lasic surgery that you take that you have the pair of glasses you put on means sometimes you forget to put them on sometimes you lose your glasses sometimes they're not accessible to you it means that sometimes you're still going to see in a blurry way having lasx surgery is a permanent change it enables you to correct the lens so that now every time you open your eyes you're seeing clearly that's the that we're trying to get to is not just saying it's not just rhetoric or a platitude it's not just something to comfort us or a cop out B is a mindset it's an attitude it's a perspective it's the way that we live our very lives it is the approach that we have and the attitude that we have and the perspective we have and the way way we're coming to life itself but I want to go back to something he said Schwarz was describing imagine a person remember he said the the holy precious Jew who's trying to awaken that sense of self you know how you awaken your you know how you enter that place you put on those glasses you undergo the lasx surgery do you know how you increase and promote the ability to live life and look through that perspective of seeing Hashem by talking to him talk to Hashem you know yesterday it's all hands on deck with homeschooling our kids these days we're not homeschooling our teachers are doing an extraordinary job just not on their campus so we are partnering with them um so when you have barem several children each on their platform they need to be separated the add of everybody on top of each other trying to do school workor and so on so we've been rotating kids who come with me to my office and do work here yesterday in the middle of the afternoon I said to my 10-year-old daughter who was here doing work uh in my office let's go in the other room let's go into the sanctuary let's go into the so we so beautifully she made me so proud We There ensuring it's not safe for everybody I'm not suggesting it for every Rabbi in every Community I work next door there's no one on the campus it's safe and for me it's very meaningful to ensure every single day that the sound of is still filling our Sanctuary just me in a safe way it's not a distancing it's absolute nobody else so we afterwards I said toim let's talk to Hashem what's on your mind tell him and we had the most incredible conversation with him talking about her grandparents and their health her concerns and her worries what's happening in fears and schools and PES talk to Hashem know you walk away feeling on fire you walk away feeling you have just contributed to a genuine relationship is there a relationship in our lives which is not enhanced and enriched by communication ask any therapist or counselor read any article on the subject ask any Guru in the tell you that the core and Foundation of any relationship its health is determined by the communication we have are we communicating with our creator do we talk to him and I don't just mean the words of the sitter which of course represent the template that Hashem gave us to that our rabis gave us in order to talk to him best they gave us the script in the language but we're supposed to speak in between the script fill in the lines with what's happening in our life talk to him thank him for what's going right and what's going well and the gifts and blessings you have and protest and object to the things that are not and thank him and turn to him confide in him unload on him unburden yourself on him that's what he wants and that's how he knows that we believe in him so we can live be with a pair of glasses that we put on and take off platitudes that we say feelings that come and go or we can enter a chamber we can enter a place we can enter a reality we can undergo a lasx surgery which is a permanent correction to our lens so we live life and see him everywhere we see him everywhere we see him in the sweetness of an apple different Apple than yesterday I ate yesterday his new Apple we can see him and feel him in the sweetness in the apple and the broa we're going to make on him we see him in the beautiful day and the fact that the sun still rises in the sky even when it feels like the sky is falling we can see him in every breath we take I wrote an article last week or two weeks ago not we know the miracle 12 to 20 second 20 breaths a minute that we don't even think about autonomously we simply breathe and we forget to thank him that God is present in every breath ask those who God forbid are ventilators are struggling to breathe who are needing oxygen to G what the value of every breath is whether breath is something that we should take for granted and feel entitled to or with every breath with every breath see and praise and thank him the bronchia all the things that have to work the mechanisms that have to function in order to Simply Be able to breathe so you could see Hashem in your breath and the apple and the sun which is rising and the people who are around us in the network of in the goodness and graciousness of the people Hashem really continues to be all around them the choice is ours are we putting on sunglasses and we don't see them at all do we have to put on reading glasses so when we wear them we see clearly otherwise things are blurry or do we undergo a lasic surgery where we enter that perspective and that place in which we live at our lives and we look at everything around us and we see him absolutely everywhere continuing continuing what what it means to undergo lasc surgery and to clear up the blurriness to see him everywhere is to go from a place that we see we see tension and obstacles we see things that we have to overcome to a place that we see only Harmony we see only his will we see only the way he wrote it up he says I'm not talking about individual I'm not talking about how this expresses itself in individual ways for example the specifics of the specifics of the specifics of love your neighbor as yourself there's one root there's one core there's one there's one Foundation there is a way of being that nothing can stand against that there is no obstacle there is no tension to over and everything flows and everything comes and everything emanates from here so you'll say you know this is all nice when everything's going well around us I can see him everywhere and thank him everywhere and feel him everywhere but these are incredible difficult times how am I supposed to see and feel Hashem so I want to share with you I want to end by sharing with you something from the Seder for the ha get ready for PES because we can tap into the people who went through a time and atrocities that are infinitely worse and there's nothing infinitely worse than any of you or any of us who've lost a loved one who are themselves sick and struggling and battling I don't want to minimize that there literally is nothing worse than that but if we zoom out that lens and we're looking big ad at this entire crisis and episode and for the overwhelming majority who are incredibly blessed and fortunate whose biggest problem is making pesak at home for now thank God then we look to our own Heroes those who had incredible Faith before us who maintained that sense of amuna almost unimaginable and incomprehensible yet while going through the worst suffering in history in his and I can read it to you in in the Hebrew and his a art put out a in English I have it here as well and he says the following we know that at the SED we eat the mat and we eat the and sometimes you Cann help wonder why is mar doing at the Seder this is our night of Freedom our night of royalty our night of majesty why are we still tasting bitterness where is the place for bitterness in a night of Celebration and a night of happiness and many ask this question and many answers are given R cook gives a beautiful answer he says you can only appreciate the matah you can only appreciate Freedom when you know slavery you only appreciate sweetness when you know bitterness the contrast is what creates the appreciation of what is and sometimes only when you've lost something do you appreciate what you've had and I hope and frankly I fear that when we come back from this that many people will very quickly lose that sense of Love of coming to shul we'll lose the things that we don't have right now that we so desperately crave and Miss I fear that many people will lose that sense of we'll take it for granted once again we'll take it for granted once again so of cook says that the mar Presence at the Seder is a reminder that sometimes going through the maror moments makes and enhances the matah moments even more even more special even more meaningful but here Rasha says the following we eat Mara to instill a full a firm awareness in our hearts that even when Misfortune seems to strike it's also for the best because all that Hashem does is for the best the says we are children of hem we're not allowed to cut ourselves can't create a bald spot between our eyes when someone dies and the ezar comments that Hashem loves us more than any father could love a son we should therefore not mourn excessively over Sorrows that befall us because all that happens is for our best we might not always understand hashem's design but we have to trust him like a child trusts his father nonetheless and this wasa's approach to life we're going to talk about this Mo shabas or shabas about optimism and the glass half full and maintaining Our Hope and who was the Paradigm of that if not Reb AKA who even as he's going to his death in the Romans are fllying his skin continues to nevertheless project an eternal hope and optimism a boundless sense of faith that was it everything he does even as it's so difficult as we're enduring and going through RAB AA laughed he laughed he had that positive endless Outlook says rash I heard from my rebi the closenberg rebi you know who the closenberg rebi was if you know and now is not the time Rasha story about his father who was in the Barrack next to the kenberg rebba his father was not a kenberg but he heard that the kenberg rebba a great sad in g and an unbelievable individual was in the next Barrack and his father R mosha Weiss traded places with a man in that Barrack he was in the Barrack with that man's son and he traded places and the man said you know if we're found to be in the wrong Barrack at roll call it could cost us our life and Rasha his father said to him We're likely going to die anyway shouldn't you at least be with your son I want to be with the clb and he came to the Reb and he said new let's talk and learning and the Reb said here in this darkest deepest place of geham talk Torah and he said we have nothing else left we might as well let's talk Torah they began to talk Torah they talked Torah through the their time in aitz and he remained a of his after the Cen rebba lost his entire family his wife and 13 children he rebuilt hisas after the war but I don't know anybody and I can't think of anything each life is so precious and anyone who undergoes the loss of life and anyone who is concerned and threatened by a loved one who right now is in danger we dve him from the bottom of our hearts they have a speedy and painless and quick and complete recovery Hashem shall bring it K as quickly today as this entire episode came to us we pray and we DAV and we hope and we turn but whatever anyone is enduring the lost all of his children his wife his entire family everything and he said the following Insight after the war he said why do we cover our eyes when we accept hasm sovereignty we say sh we take our hand and we cover our eyes why declare he said represents the hashem's attribute of Mercy El the attribute of justice and shma we declare that both names are one the attribute of justice is also a manifestation of hashem's Mercy hashem's Justice often appears to be so harsh that we must cover our eyes to hide the outward appearance and we declare expressing our firm belief that everything he does somehow some way is for our best call offers a beautiful explanation of the verse in which hasem tells yov ainu don't fear to descend Egypt yose will place his hands over your eyes Yakov considered his descent to Egypt a terrible misfortune but Hashem re reassured him that the end he would see that it was actually for the best like yose's Des sentence slavery yose's descent also seemed like a terrible misfortune at first but in the end it became apparent the entire story had been a manifestation of hashem's hidden kindness Yos became the vice Ro of par was able to support jakob's family during the time of famine when Hashem told yob yose would place his hands over his eyes he was referring to the practice of covering our eyes when we say shma he reminded Yakov that we must ignore outward appearances and trust that hm's attribute of justice is actually part of his attribute of Mercy in other words said sometimes the only way to believe in Hashem is to cover our eyes stop looking at the I you bed stop looking at the lack of ventilators stop looking at the viruses stop looking at the stock market falling stop looking at that reality sometimes the only way and the best way that we can continue to submit and to put all of our faith in him is to cover our eyes when we say shma to really believe aluu and to believe Hashem andu the God of Justice and the god of compassion are really one that even that which feels like justice and harshness is itself an expression of his love you have to cover your eyes sometimes in order to be able to even just say those words and says Rasha that is the significance of the M that's at our table to realize that the m is also part of the matah story that even those moments of bitterness even those experiences of harshness even those times in which we struggle to see him to feel him to find him it's part of a bigger story and that's what it means to dip into and to tap into our sense of Faith to know that he's there talk to him protest object argue intervene intercede advocate on behalf of the people that we love Davin from the depths of our being talk to him talk to him if you're blessed to minimally be affected by this thank him from the bottom of your soul you don't know how lucky you are if you still have air in your lungs and you don't need a device in order to be able to breathe thank him from the bottom of your heart and if you know somebody who's sick Davin from the depths of your being turn to him lean on him object protest and Advocate to him we end that we should not have any more m in our lives but only matah we shouldn't taste the taste of bitterness but only the taste of freedom and Redemption that those who are sick and those who are suffering and the people who love him should find healing and Solace and strength and courage and faith that they should be better as quickly as they got sick and be returned to their families to celebrate a beautiful and a festive p and that all of us Merit to get to the level of our dear friend to whom the she is dedicated our dear friend Brian who whatever was happening in his life would continue to say Hashem is amazing everything is amazing May everything be amazing in our lives a holy a holiday of Faith a holiday of redemption National human Global and personal a holiday of only the best of everything and please God will resume immediately after PES