Parsha Perspectives for Today (Vayigash, 5785) - Whose Derech?

okay good morning what a privilege we have to learn together on this holy day that combines the energy the light of a new month new beginning new possibility with the light of Kaneka the time of Miracles please God we should Merit miracles in our time Welcome Home the hostages and welcome home all the soldiers and welcome a sweeping triumphant victory over our enemies page 250 in the Arts girl Stone KES we have the privilege of learning parash our par series is gener sponsored by Becky and ab cats and family and memory of David grman nishas Benes we remain very very grateful to the cats family okay I want to see a little bit at the opening of the paraa and then we're going to make our way to the end of the paraa which we never do to pick up where we left off last year which we always promise we will and to see the para a little bit from the other perspective but let's just start with the beginning because it's one of my favorite openings of a par every para of course you're not supposed to have favorites but the beginning of this para the drama that unfolds from the end of last week to this week when the drama is escalating and you see at the end of last week ysf is is holding bamin and telling the brothers you're gonna have to go back you're gonna have to lose another brother you're gonna have to explain it to your father and the tension is building and building and building until the opening of this morning's para in that moment he approaches and he says to Yosef if you please if you listen may your servant speak a word in your ear I always picture the lawyer telling the judge may I approach the bench Can I approach the bench Can Only Imagine This is the vice Roy the vice president of all of Egypt the strongest Empire in the world ysep has an Entourage he has his staff he has his secret service they're all there the brothers Yosef ysep is telling them this is it I caught you red-handed you're leaving them here for good and this Panic that ensues the brother's fear how are we going to go back to our father again with another brother the only brother from that same mother who will be missing and in that moment Yehuda looks around there's nobody else he steps up he steps forward he steps out and he says may I approach the can I speak to you can I speak to you from my heart you are like and then he recounts the whole history says you asked us this and we answered that and then you said this and then we said that and you can't do it take me instead imprison me for good can't do it and in that moment Yosef can't take it anymore and yose feels compelled to be able to reveal himself to his brothers he can't stand it he can't take it he's overwhelmed he empties the room and he reveals himself to his brothers we've shared many times we're not going to repeat now that Vash is a very when we read this paraa with a little break a little distance it seems normal and natural that Yehuda says can I approach the bench but if all you do is turn back a page they're in the middle of a conversation they're in the middle of a conversation Y and what are we gonna say what could we do y replies Sac religious the man who has the Goblet he has what do you mean Yehuda approaches and begins to speak he's already in the middle of a conversation where is he approaching where is he speaking and we've spoken about this in the past UDA summons up the courage Yehuda all of a sudden approaches confronts the word Vash is used three times in the Torah and that's why the r quotes we take three steps forward to begin our amida corresponding with the three times the word Vash is used in the Torah just like three people stepped up steep forward Abraham on behalf of sto Yehuda now on behalf of Bin eloi and Hara Carmel these three stepped up these three mustered the courage they confronted they advocated so too when we take those three steps forward to begin our we are stepping up we're stepping out our prayers are not only for ourselves our well-being our happiness and our needs we are taking those three steps forward in order to pray for people around us in order to pray for people around us so that we've covered in the past but I want to share with you a teaching of the Holy reab says the following is appointed he is number too most power second most powerful man on the planet when the brothers descend down to Egypt in order to try to get Provisions in order to be able to survive this famine they don't recognize him he recognizes them and he plots he schemes to put this goblet in the backpack of Benjamin of bamin in order to accuse binyamin and as we spoke about previous viously ysf is recreating his own experience he's putting the brothers in the position to achieve what the ramban will later call chuva gamur complete and absolute repentance how does the ramam Define shua gamur to be in the same Circumstance the same Temptation the same energy and yet to make a different choice and yet a different result or outcome how could yoseph construct the most similar most parallel circumstance to his own well there's only one brother he has from the same father and mother that's Y how can it be that Benyamin will be in a pit in jail when yose was thrown in the pit will anyone Step Up will anyone speak up will anyone advocate for him and in this moment at the moment that he finds that goblet in Ben yamin's backpack he accuses Benyamin you're a thief you're a robber you're going to jail you're staying here everyone else go home everyone else nothing more to see here everyone else be on your way you're staying for good so in that moment Yuda all of a sudden the same Yehuda who had thrown yose into the same Yehuda who had thought of selling y the same Yehuda now instead of marginalizing instead of getting rid of a brother this time he steps up for a brother and this time he stands in for a brother he says take me instead why this beautiful safer not himself but it brings and quotes Torah from RAB applies it to the par why why does the Torah formulate this as yehud approached why not simply say Yehuda said to yose Yehuda communicated to yose why is it formulated as he stepped up Rabbi say they learned from here in that moment the picture is supposed to be as if he took a breath stuck out his chest put back his shoulders stood up strong and stepped up to Yosef but he didn't just taken a deep breath and put out his chest and take back his shoulders and stand tallal understand the Torah is teaching us that he prepared himself for prayer who true he's communicating with ysf true he's asking ysf true he's confronting ysf but as he steps up to confront ysf he first has a conversation with whom with hasem we learned something here a very powerful powerful lesson about prayer about prayer Yuda is about to do something incredibly dangerous putting himself in a very precarious situation yoseph who is the vice Roy of Egypt the most second most powerful man Yosef could say how dare you challenge my ruling how dare you challenge my conclusion I'm not keeping you instead of bam I'm keeping bamin and I'm killing you he's about to do something very dangerous very dangerous so he turns to Hashem and he doens on the way Hashem I'm going to step up I think that's what you want from me in this moment let me be successful let me find the words let me be compelling let me be persuasive let me change this Leader's mind Hashem I need your help I need you to give me the words in one of the most popular teachings of it appears everybody knows a Jew has to always be you have to always be happy you have to always be happy in life and to distance ourselves from sadness sadness depressiveness despondency it is our cryptonite it brings us down it takes away our energy we're not able to live our best selves it absolutely suffocates our creativity our energy our ambition ambition our aspiration sadness sabotages any possibility of success Sab sadness destroys the relationships around us relationship with oursel and the relationship with hem even when we have good reason to be sad when a person looks at himself and says I've made terrible mistakes I've come up so short I've been such a failure and the is trying to entice us look at your life look at your failures look at your shortcomings look at the mistakes you've made and be said over them you're hopeless you're helpless you're pathetic youf look at how many things you've done wrong you blew it again you yelled at your spouse or your children look at it you did it again you lost money you did it again you looked at or acted out in the ways that you shouldn't have late at night look at you you spoke the lanara you said the hurtful thing you've destroyed a relationship look at you you lost another job you lost another client you lost another customer you're hopeless you're helpless you're pathetic says even in that moment especially in that moment a Jew can't stumble a Jew can't fail even in that moment find the Hope find the good find the praiseworthy admirable find what Foundation you could build on there's no one there's no one utterly and entirely irredeemable there's no one who there's not something to build on some success some Joy some positivity some accomplishment some achievement find something what did you get right where you have a win where do you have an achievement but sometimes even the thing we did right is incomplete it's not really it's not it's not perfect who maybe we did the Mitzvah but we didn't do it right it was imperfect we didn't have the right thoughts or mindfulness while we did it there are a million in one reasons to build ourselves up person has to always find the good in themselves to be able to become into a place of sim you can't fulfill whatever you're meant to do you can't wake up and greet the day and roar like a lion if you're not if you fall and trip out of bed if you stumble you're lazy you're lethargic if you're procrastinating if you feel like a failure if you don't believe you have hope if you don't think you're redeemable you'll never get anything done but you got to jump out of bed and roar like a lion if you think you're all bad and there's nothing good or redeemable in you then of course you're going to be terribly sad and you're going to be hopeless and you're going to give up but if you take a moment if you pause if you think if you introspect if you reflect and you say you know what look at this good look at the family I produced look at least at my children look at that Mitzvah that I did look at that nice thing look at that accomplishment look at that achievement look at that small nuda can I find a small point a small something to build out of if you find something good in yourself you find in yourself where's my where's the godliness in me where's that ambition where is that hope where's that worthiness where's the godliness in me and that based on this teaching of rabman maybe is what the means love when a person wants to step up to DAV sometimes you feel this weight I'm going to DAV I'm going to go to schw tomorrow morning do you know what I did late last night what I looked at what I said how I behaved where I went what I did how I acted out what now I'm gonna go DAV the same pathetic me who spoke lashar the same pathetic me who forgot yo same pathetic me who yelled at my kids the same pathetic me who even though I made so many promises each day this is going to be the day I'm gonna exercise I'm gonna be patient I'm gonna be calm I'm gonna be good I'm Gonna Be Kind I'm going to check in on people and then it's another end of the day I'm a failure I haven't done any of the those things I promised myself I would do and I'm going to go DAV tomorrow I'm going to open my mouth I'm going to move my lips I have something to say that Hashem thinks is worth hearing when a Jew steps up when we stand up to we have to believe there is no one and nothing in this world that doesn't have God he's in me it's a new day it'ses a new possibility a brand new bright new day this is my day I am redeemable I have hope I could build upon that nuda that Salim The Godly Soul inside me and that's what it means what did Yehuda say before he has the courage to step up to ysf you know what he says not who am I a failure I already got rid of one brother who am I to step up and represent another brother I'm a gourish I'm a nothing I'm an ice no a has to stand up proud and say be Adon you know who I am in Me Is God I'm a prince I'm a princess I'm a child of royalty do you know who I am do you know what I'm made of do you know what's inside me if you're looking for the courage or bravery to step up to speak out all you ever have to say is be it's in me even within the darkness even within the mistakes you're always with me and then we could say so this is describing not only what y does when he steps up and confronts Yehuda but when Yehuda does when he steps up and confronts Yosef but it's giving us the courage how we can still D and we can confront I see in this Incredible strength we're living in a time of this of anti-Semitism and there are so many public spheres and moments where we need courage don't tolerate the way we're being treated the way we're being spoken about the way we're being spoken to stand up stand up like a proud Jew an Unapologetic Jew non-defensive Jew a strong Jew who has an army who's decimating the Nations around it stand up speak up how can you speak up because be Adon I have hasem in me I don't have to cower I don't have to apologize I don't have to be afraid be I have in and that's where we can find the courage and The Bravery to say what needs to be said to say it to whom it needs to be heard that's where we can find the courage not only in our that we're worthy and that's worth our doing but also the people that we need to confront has another interpretation of be Adon because it is peculiar Y is already in the middle of a conversation with yose and all of a sudden he sayson may I approach the Ben be if it may please you can I say something in your ear uh yeah you've been talking to me for the last hour Jose doesn't turn to yud and say are you serious you're asking me if you you've been speaking to me nonstop now you're asking if you could speak B Adon So based on we saw yose wasn't talking to Yehuda be Adon to whom was he talking to himself be Adon I can have the courage because be Adon because In Me Is God in Me is God has a different interpretation said you know what was telling y listen for a moment switch places with me look look through my eyes live this through my experience can you imagine yud is telling yose listen I understand from your perspective you caught my younger brother he's got the goblet in his napsack you're keeping him forever that was the condition of the deal but Yuda says switch places with me now he reviews the entire you said this I said that then this thing happened why is he reviewing it it just happened a moment ago it's not like this is ancient history why is he reviewing something that just happened a moment ago the answer is because what he's trying to do is paint a picture for ysf he says Ys live this from my perspective look at it from my point of view switch places with me what would you do and you see this Y is practicing y already demonstrated this when later in the Y and yob are going to reunite they're going to meet again the P says y he appeared to him who appeared to whom Ys ysf appeared to his father what does that mean ysf appeared to his father in that moment ysf could have been focused on me I haven't seen my father in 22 years I need a hug I need a kiss I need some verbal affirmation validation affection it's about me I need to know the answer of what happened all these 22 years but in that moment ysf ysf doesn't live from his perspective Yosef switches places with his father Joseph says to himself how does my father feel after 22 years of being aart how has my father experienced this 22e absence what does my father need right now how can I live this from his perspective he didn't go to see his father he went to appear to his father similarly we go every we go the three festive holidays p and not to see God but to be seen by God how does God feel what does God want what does God want to see so In This Moment the strategy that Yehuda is employing is be Adon switch places with me experience it from my vantage point what do you want me to do what would you do if you were in my shoes I just published an article yesterday I spoke at the conference a couple weeks ago and a man told me this incredible incredible story that he had been a very cold clinical physician and he had his own experience with suffering and pain and from it he learned and derived why he needs to be much more compassionate much more compassionate there's a movement in the medical community and there's research that shows the benefit if a doctor in a hospital setting or even just in their exam room if instead of standing while you're lying vulnerably in some gown on a table instead of the doctor standing over you looking down at you while you're lying God forbid in a hospital bed in a hospital room if the doctor pulls up a chair so you're now on eye level do you know the research shows the impact on the recovery of the patient when a doctor is on eye level looks them in the eye on the same level expresses compassion has that b Adon switch places with me doctor if you were lying in this bed how would you want to be spoken to would you want the doctor to be patient and explain and be on eye level and look in the eye and feel compassion eye level eye level what Dr Jerome grman my father-in-law's cousin incredible uh published physician calls the medicine of friendship the medicine of friendship be Adon switch places how would you feel that's yehuda's compelling argument to ysf ysf I know from your perspective this is what you think needs to happen but be a switch places with me for a moment look at it from my perspective and what would you do that's what Yehuda is arguing to so we saw two or three interpretations what be Adon is you talking to ysf is you talking to himself is you talking to Hashem who is talking to but when we're about to do something that takes courage DAV on it DAV on it you have to have a difficult conversation there are difficult conversations that have to be had sometimes with a judge with a business partner with a spouse with a child all kinds of difficult conversations Vash we have to man up and step up andash the difficult conversations on the way to that difficult conversation don't forget to have them with Hashem Hashem put the right words in my mouth let me say the most compelling persuasive give me the right thing to say say let me be effective I'm going to have an audience with a powerful person I'm able to have a relationship text continue a conversation with somebody of influence give me the right words don't try to figure out on our own But realize that is helping us and therefore turn to him first for help okay skip all the way to par meest so the story unfolds you all know it yoseph can't constrain himself anymore kicks everyone out of the room doesn't want to embarrass his brothers and he says the famous words the words that ultimately become the words that ultimately become very uh they mus with two words with two words he said the most startling the most shocking the most gripping muster a person can give an y I am y he didn't have to continue and say you low life crazy good for nothing you threw me in that pit but look at me I made it I'm over you you now need me all he has to say is an Ys and everything comes together the picture becomes clear they have the answer to all their questions everything now becomes clear and it's shocking the vnon had a tradition has a tradition that if you want to know what geham looks like hopefully none of us will be there but if you want to know what geham will be H double hockey sticks as my kids call it if you want to know what ganam looks like the gr says you sit on a couch next to the almighty he presses play and you watch your whole life and he doesn't have to say a word because you watch The Good the Bad and the Ugly you watch the moments when you know people are watching and you watch the moments when you thought you were all alone you watch what you're proud of and you watch what you are unbelievably ashamed and embarrassed by and he's sitting right there next to you oh and he invites everyone you ever knew to come watch your life with you he doesn't have to do or say anything more because that is hell that is torturous that is punitive that is miserable that is suffering and that's all he needs to do is press play yose all he has to say is an y they get whopped they get punched in the gut an yose he reveals himself but then he quickly reframes it don't worry I'm not GNA take revenge I'm not getting even you think you could have sent me down here I couldn't be here if it wasn't part of God's master plan he reframes reframes the psychological tool called reframing he puts a new frame that changes the whole picture you can change the entire picture with a new frame and by putting a new frame around the picture of what had happened he reframes for the brothers and says yeah not your most Shining Moment yeah you shouldn't be proud of what you did but don't worry it couldn't have happened if God didn't want me here we're here now let's be brothers going forward which brings us to per me chapter 45 verse T so he says to them quick go up to my father that your son y he's still alive and here's what he has to say tell Dad that I said you're not gonna believe it you remember the underachieving kid you remember the one you didn't think would get anywhere in school I'm the master of all of Egypt would you believe it Al quick come down don't delay I want to see you I want you to see me I want to see it for yourself hurry up you have to come down he tells the brothers hurry up stop delaying quick get to our father my father a you'll notice he keeps calling him my father why does he calling him my father when he first reveals himself I am Y is my father still alive which is a peculiar question considering a moment ago yehuda's whole argument was you cannot send me back without bamin my father will die and yoseph says I'm Yosef is my father still alive he just told you that your father's alive a millisecond ago why is that your question because yoseph didn't ask is your father still alive that Yehuda just answered what did he ask is my father still alive is the one who loves me who learned with me who gave me a special coat is my father is the father who had a special relationship with me is that father still alive how my father still alive we're going to see that yosef's yob rather is going to reciprocate this he's going to refer to ysep later as his son his only son we'll see so here too quick hurry go up to AI my father oh your whole argument Yehuda was I can't do this to your father what about what you did to your father you put him through this 22 years what about you did to your father you're telling me that I have to send bamin back because I can't do this to your father you care so much about your father where were you to care about your father 22 years ago when you threw me in a pit when you sold me into slavery so don't tell me about your father don't tell me about your father he's not your father he's a he's my father I never heard him so bad I never took away one of his kids don't claim that you're representing you're protecting you care about our father he's not your father cuz where were you caring about your father 22 years ago he's my father why does it say go up why does it say go up because Israel is the highest of all the lands why here why now why is Rashid commenting specifically here and specifically now quick go go up to Israel and why go up to Israel because Israel is the highest of all the lands have we not mentioned Israel before Canan before after all in our story line in the narrative the brothers keep coming down and going up and coming down and going up we said in go up to inquire the well-being of your father in our parure earlier when we went up and the one young one has to go up with his brothers argues how can I go up to my father and my brother won't be with me so we've seen go up go up go up go up go up Rashi has nothing to say all of a sudden now Yosef says go up and get Dad and Rashi jumps in go up and get Dad oh why does it say go up and it's Israel is the highest of all the lands why did he wait until now if we already Ed the language of Al of Al of go up why didn't Rashi comment earlier this is the question of and he answers the following is Rashi talking about geographically topogra topographically how is Rashi describing Israel is the highest of all the lands the mountains are the highest is that true if you look at Jordan Syria Lebanon Egypt you look at the lands that surround Israel is Israel in terms of its altitude from sea level is it the highest of all the lands and is Israel the top of the globe what does it all depend on how you hold the globe bokeh could be the top of the globe if you want to hold the globe with bokeh on top so what makes Israel the highest of all the lands he's talking spiritually spiritually Israel is the holiest land in the world it has an inherent intrinsic sanctity when you go into Israel when you breathe the air of Israel when you kiss the ground of Israel when you hold the soil of Israel Israel is categorically different than the rest of the world the says while the heavens belong to God and he gave the land to man he held on to Israel Israel is a little piece of heaven here on Earth when you land You Feel It in the Air Rabbi said that the air of Israel makes us wiser why do we bend down this ancient tradition that finds its roots in the rabbis to kiss the ground now it used to be he came down the stairs he kissed the ground now you'll get trampled by the people on the way to passport control if you try to kiss when you come out of the uh out of the terminal so because it's the highest land every other land the rain the irrigation comes from a Nile natural water source Israel relies on rain it relies on Hashem Hashem is supervising he's watching over hashem's presence is much more intensely felt there is a sanctity to that land it is the only place on Earth that where the soil the dirt the Earth is Holy there are Commandments that are based on the ground that every four steps we take every six feet we walk we fulfill a Mitzvah the whole world was created out of Israel Inus tells us that the whole world was fashioned it expanded if there was a big bang it began is the tallest the highest land doesn't mean geographically it means spiritually and that's what Yad is telling his brothers you're going to get Dad and you're going to bring him down to Egypt and Egypt if Israel is the highest of any land Israel is the lowliest and lowest of every land it is morally corrupt and decadent morally compromised and confused there's moral chaos MIT is a place of absolute absolute moral corruption so therefore he says quick go up go up and bring that Rus bring that Holiness bring that sanctity bring it down don't ever leave it take it with you person has to feel connected to the spirituality and the sanctity to the Holiness ofel wherever they are wherever they are ask a Jew anywhere they live in the world where do you live and what's the answer I live in y I live in Isel I'm here temporarily on physically my address my ZIP code might right might now might right now be baton Florida where do I draw my spiritual energy where do I draw my Holiness and My Hope where do I draw my connection with where am I connected with my people with my destiny with my future I live in is that's where I live that's where I live that's where my future my destiny my history that's where I live and that's why says when we begin sayos it describes it should say these are the names of the Jewish people that came to Egypt it doesn't say that came it says that are coming you know why because they're never fully unpacked in Egypt we're never permanent residents there we're guests we're visitors we're passing through we're never there permanently we're never there permanently as the P says we he went as a gar what's a gar he didn't go Le shave sham Le shave means unpack resident change your address he went lagur what's a g I'm visiting stopping by I'm a stranger I'm a stranger our mentality our attitude has to be we're not here permanently this isn't our future this is not where we plan to be we are just passing through we passed through Egypt we passed through Persia we passed through we passed through all kinds of civilizations we made our way through Spain and there was a time that we were in France and we had some Glory Glory times even in Poland and Germany and we never fully unpacked it because we never became permanent there we were we were always in root where's the destination if the Jewish people are always in route and Transit the destination is we're going back to our homeland we're going back to and is so if that's the case if we are don't ever forget and don't ever fail to remain connected to our homeland where we are from here's a long essay I'll just skip to one other part of it because it's one of my favorites he's shared it and we've shared it before and we've shared it before we say at the end of the end of we say if you want to have longevity if you want to live a long life Al on our homeland how could you live a long life on your Homeland if we're not in our homeland if right now we're living outside of our homeland tells us that they told what's a Sab Sab what's a sabba a z there are old men in B so he said how could there be old men in B says you can only achieve longevity old age in our homeland on our land in the Holy Land how could you be how could there be old men in B so they answered k no no no these old men they come early and they leave late the sh that's how they achieve their longevity the mar the kak and others explain based on this do you know what that means if you want a taste the Embassy of Israel in every community of the diaspora is where it's not in Miami at the Israeli Embassy you know where it's found that intense presence of the Divine that feeling of connection of inspiration both to our people and to our maker that which Israel provides where can we get a small taste of it even when we're not in Israel in the Sho the sh not in the house minion not outside on the Block not in some other Gathering Place it's in the sh the sh that is the base kessis it's a place of gathering that is the embassy just like the Israeli Embassy in New York and the American Embassy in Israel each have the Sovereign status of the land they repres represent they are bound by the laws of the land that they represent the embassy so to every sh is an embassy of the sanctity and Holiness of the land of Israel and that's how there are sa that's how there are older people even in even in bu so quick quick go up go up to Dad and bring him down but bring down some of that sanctity so true that's how R druk is answering we asked we already mentioned going up so many times why didn't Rashi make that comment earlier the answer is because now you're going up to get Dad and bring him down now is when you need to bring down some of that sanctity some of that Holiness now is when there'll need to be embassies even outside of Israel because we're going to be in Egypt for a little while per so the brothers were ready to go gave them wagons based On's permission by and he gave them what's a little bag of food a little Peele he gave him a little snacks to take on the way wonders the Wonders the the great he already gave them Provisions for the way he already gave them food bring back this food to your father to our father so why on top of the food that he packed why on top of the meals that he packed on top of that he also has to give them a little doggy bag of snacks a little of some snacks what are you putting there stom abyssle what else some Cape Cod potato chips some traded joke corn chips some rice krispy treats some kanuka GT he gave them each a little pack they couldn't take these enormous packages of food he had given them the provisions and from that make a couple sandes could make a couple peanut butter and jelly sandwiches some tuna sandwiches why did he have to give them both provisions and on top of the provisions he also gave them snacks says this is not just about something to eat it's not just about having something to eat because that they had they had food to eat he already gave them big boxes of food why does a person pack snacks because I want you to think of Bobby and Zeda on the way home my grandchildren are going back today it's a sad day so when you give a few lollipops and a few candies it jeffl has snacks or United or whatever Airline they're flying they have snacks why did Bobby and Zeda have to pack snacks too because when you're on that plane on the way home I want you to remember how much your Bobby and Z love you and are thinking about you and are going to miss you and can't wait to see you again when you take out that lollipop you're getting a kiss from your Z getting a kiss from Z so when you give someone a snack and you say you're going on your way was wonderful to have you for chabas was so nice it came for Kana it was great you came for the meal take a little something the take a little something is not for the food because the person has access to food the take a little something is I'm communicating I'm messaging to you I care about you I love you and wherever you're going take a little piece of me with you wherever you're going remember me when you get there wherever you're going keep a connection to where you just came from and where do we see this from not coincidentally Z those learning the da we just covered this in sanedrin the Elders of the city they find a corpse a murder victim and we can't find the murderer we don't know the identity of the victim we don't know the identity of the murderer how are we going to solve this crime we bring the Sanhedrin from yush and they measure which city was closest and then there's a whole break neck of a calf that's never worked and they recite a formula that includes that we didn't send this person away without Provisions we didn't fail to send them away I understand what it means we didn't send them away without eating and drinking how can a person Journey how could they have the energy to make it there how could they fight whatever enemy they'd confront along the way if they don't have food but what does it mean that we're not guilty because there's no guess that we didn't walk out who cares if you walk them out why can't I be sitting on the couch open my belt buckle I finish this delicious meal and I say to the person when they're ready to leave close the door behind you it was wonderful to spend time next time at your place and I don't have to get up off my couch why I have to get up off my couch why I have to walk the person out because because the person feels wow wow the honor I re they walked me out they care they're walking me along the way what happens when you talk to someone while you walk them out what you're saying is take me with you take this experience this conversation be changed by it we'll both still remember it look at y's good mid and we're meant to emulate and walk in this way that even if the person is on their way to have another big meal they got plenty of food where they're going they don't need your food but you know why you pack them a little leftovers you know why you give them a little snack you know why you give them a lollipop what you're saying is I want you to remember me in the car on the plane on the walk home when you get wherever you're going this experience I want you to remember me when else do we see this and say this malava Mala Mo shabas we continue to eat to enjoy a little bit more from chabas malava Mala that queen that we greeted on Friday night and that queen that we spent 25 hours with known as chabas now malava Mala we're escorting the queen because what we're saying is I want to stay connected until next shabas until you come back again I'm walking you out queen I'm walking you out because I want to stay connected until you come back again next shabas so it's not about the food it's about the message and the messaging it's about the relationship it's about the it's about those delicious little girls on the plane today remembering that Bobby and Z love you and they give you a lollipop and they give you some snacks and they want you to be so excited to come back again Turn the Page has another message for them too he sends his brothers he is a parting message to them they're going back they're leaving they're on their way back to their father to go get him and bring him down and what's The Parting message to them is don't do not translate the word tazu Gaz [Music] do not become agitated on the way says art scroll th men to agitated what does agitated mean don't become agitated on the way don't become agitated on the way why would they be agitated on the way hurry up go get Dad and bring him down here and then The Parting message is and whatever you do on the way don't be TI Gazo on the way up what does it mean Rashi has three interpretations and all of them are hinting that yose was alluding to a message for his brothers the first don't become engaged in don't get so engaged and engrossed in a matter of Hala I thought that's Noble I thought we look up to that talk in Torah talk in learning talk in div Torah that's yosef's parting message to his brothers what's the matter with ysf he should say to them the whole way home learn t with one another what do you mean Al don't talk in Torah well y was telling have you ever been so engrossed in a conversation so deep in thought that you missed your exit I don't want you to get frustrated on the way so pay attention don't get lost in such a complicated complex conversation of Torah that you're GNA lose your way because I want you to get Dad and bring him down even a noble Topic at the expense of the simple thing be present be in the moment do what you're meant to be doing right then don't get caught up in something else so rash's first interpretation don't get caught up in a sugya and and therefore get confused from the simple things maybe what Yos is really telling them is don't get lost in debating a noble Topic at the expense of the simple things like don't get caught up in the Su of hating me and get lost again along the way don't repeat the mistake rashi's second suggestion is don't go too quickly walk slowly wait one second didn't a moment ago he say which is it mixed messaging a minute ago he said mahu go quickly now he says Al whoa slow down so which is it speed up slow down mix messaging that quick steps damage a person's eyesight a person who walks too quickly will hurt their eyes the quotes of who explains what it means is when a person moves too quickly through life when you take steps without pause without thinking without judgment without consideration when you move too quickly it clouds your judgment it blinds you it blinds you eyes is a metaphor for judgment for what we're looking at what we're seeing if you're moving too quickly if you're judging too quickly you're going to make St mistakes walking through life literally and figuratively demands calmness deliberation thoughtfulness maharu don't delay go with purpose but simultaneously alter Gazo don't rush irresponsibly be balanced you know we all know people who are analysis paralysis analysis paralysis they can't make a decision for the life of them it takes forever whether ordering in a restaurant or choosing a vacation spot or deciding about the job job or looking through all the sh reses analysis paralysis they overthink it a billion and one different ways it takes forever so yose says maharu come on move with purpose get this done don't analyze overanalyze so you become paralyzed but be balanced don't go so quickly that you're G to go blind you're gonna have poor judgment you're GNA act impulsively and impetuously you're going to make terrible mistakes find that balance and lastly rash has a third I'll means when you leave don't fight don't place blame don't quarrel what would they be fighting about he sends them on their way and he says whatever you do don't fight the third shot rash is whatever you're doing don't fight what would they be fighting about I'll tell you what they'd be fighting about tell you what I'd be fighting about whose fault it was who got them into this trouble they've just lived this unbelievable drama I'm not exaggerating or minimizing PTSD when I say they like at PTSD first they got rid of their brother they live with such regret for it 22 years they see their father inconsolable and suffering then there's a famine in the land they're starving to death they go back but they keep Shimon they have to go back and tell their father he says bring Benyamin they take enormous responsibility they make this arduous Journey again they bring Benyamin now a false accusation he wants to keep Benyamin then an yose the big reveal everything the picture becomes clear can imagine the fear they had that this Yosef boy this brother is about to get even he promises he won't but how do they know that now they're on a journey back to go tell their father who's gonna have a lot of questions what do you mean he's still alive you told me he was killed by a wild animal can't begin to imagine what's going through their minds and their hearts and you know what they're likely going to be doing fighting with each other fighting I said leave him alone no you said kill him I said dip the coat will never work I told you once reality sets in yose's alive they're going to now face the consequences of what they've done there's an enormous risk they're going to bicker and blame and battle and yose's not interested in any of that yose who could have been thrilled by that image Yosef who could have been tremendously Satisfied by the picture of their killing each other on the way home that's not ysf all ysf wants is peace and unity and serenity and love with his brothers but it goes even deeper the holy m is is quotes Z the Reb of kmir who says something amazing yob was telling his brothers something much more than don't just bicker or fight or blame in those three words Yakov diagnosed the issue that led to the whole episode and he was begging his brothers to correct it going forward and the Torah is begging every one of us you know what that means it means don't get angry about other people's D don't criticize don't make them conform don't marginalize them don't get angry because they've taken another choice because you know what there are many paths towards Hashem after all that's this image there are 12 there are 12 paths there are 12 Min BRS this is our whole this is our whole uh theme this is who we are diversity and unity there are 12 entrances to the B mikdash 12 tribes 12 perspectives and you've got every every diversity of there are many paths towards Hashem alter G don't get angry because someone's on another D says ysf because look what happened because I chose a different D than you look what you did to me and look how we all wound up so don't be because someone's on a different let people choose their D and even when they're off the D let them make their way back on the D and love them whatever D they're on don't use as a weapon don't blunt or beat up others don't force or make conform everyone to be on your D I'll because that's what led to this all that's how we got into this problem to begin with you're going home now you're going to get our father Turn the Page it's a new chapter for our family we're gonna have unity and love we're going to allow and make room for people to choose their D the of the Torah are Pleasant and that by the way is a message of KHAK the r the very end of if you only have enough money enough resources to either pay for shabas candles or candles which do you buy which do you pay for shabas candles why because shabas candles represent Shalom bias Shalom is the greatest shom is the greatest thing how do you know that because the p says if you're Le learning and practice of Torah make you intolerant of other people's that's not Torah the many pths of Torah are they're Pleasant and they're sweet and they're loving and they're embracing and they're welcoming and they are uniting and if Torah is making you intolerant and dismissive and rejecting and marginalizing of other people's D then that's not Torah you're learning because Al y's enduring message to his brothers that's how he got into this and that's not how we're going to get out of a so they go and they report everything yov sees the wagons AAL a hint to the last Su the last thing that they were learning together which was arua you have to escort people out be Mal as we spoke about he came back to life his Spirit his soul was restored was restored says the what does it mean the he quotes the kadish even before we get to that we'll skip to the says what's an aalos the wagons why are wagons called aalas aalas mil IG what's IG a circle so why is a wagon called a circle what does it have on it for the wheels the wheels the circles are what makes the wagon go so it's called Anala because Eagle the four circles the wagons yob doesn't want to go down to Egypt why would want to leave the elevated spiritual high of Israel to go down to the morally corrupt lowly place of Egypt so Yosef sends him Wheels to tell him that life Works in circles and Wheels come down because don't worry we're GNA go back up don't be afraid to come down it's all part of God's master plan come down we're g to do and get out of this place what we need to and then we're going to go back up life is a wheel life is a circle Life Works in Cycles it's true for what's coming and it's true for what just happened and that's the message say what ysf was embedding as a message to Yakov was I'm sending you these four wheels these four circles life is coming full circle I haven't seen you in 22 years there were dreams you thought were crazy life is coming full circle how can I allude that to you feel safe to come down I'm sending you for four circles to remind you that life is coming full circle full circle okay and now is who's is not yov we've been playing this game when the Torah calls him yov when the Torah calls him is here the Torah is calling him what is my son still alive I need to go and I need to see him before I die why is he now confident to be able to go see him before he dies because y sent in the wheels come down it's going to go for a circle we're going to come out you have nothing to worry about how does he describe his son and says this is a parallel when Ys reveals himself to his brothers what does he say now yob says he called him a and now his father calls himo he could have just said y or o Ben why does he say o y because the same way that ysf was alluding to the father who had a unique singular special relationship with him Yakov is now reciprocating and alluding is my son not the Yosef which yosf is alive how Ys B is ysf my son the little B Torah the innocent sweet pure delicious ysf in my image is that to Yosef or has he become changed is he different is he secular does he now have other Ambitions who is this yose Vice Roy of Egypt old Ys Ben is the Yos who Ben so Ys asked about his father ow a and now his father asks about his son y there's a beautiful parallelism there's a beautiful symmetry taking place here so yob answers in the affirmative I'll go down Turn the Page says I'll go down and then God Appears to him why does God appear to him right now he hadn't appeared to him for a little while why not the whole time yob was sad like RAB teaches when you're sad God can't appear to you nobody wants to be around sad people including God so when a person is down and out and sad and miserable and fising and negative and complaining and criticizing nobody wants to be around them not their family not their friends and not even the almighty God that's why one of the prerequisites to prophecy is to be you have to be happy doesn't mean you're not realistic person can be suffering going through pain and still be very happy you have to be so now that yov whom who was terribly inconsolable till now now that yob knows his son is alive so the prophecy returns to him God returns to him and what does God say to him don't worry yes it's safe go down because I'm going with you I'm going with you says on these words I'm going down with you not only are the Jewish people in Exile the too is in Exile not only are the Jewish people homeless the is also homeless God himself participated in the march from Egypt he traveled with us from Egypt because he also went with us into Egypt he was in bondage he was liberated with us he was a fellow traveler he wandered with us it is not as if a KES remained in his transcendental Abode after the destruction of the temple and guide the Jews from afar he's in Exile as much as we are he comes with us we should feel his love and feel his presence and feel his support and feel him navigating us through whatever we're going through God comes with us into our problems God takes us out when God says I'm coming with you how does he describe it why does he describe it as I'm going with you says every time you see the word Ani in the Torah what should you think of an the Ten Commandments the first one I am the Lord your God so I'm going down with you to Egypt says the means I'm going down with you I'm also taking you out and this is all part of the journey too to be able to get to ouri to get that Torah to live our best selves to live our fullest Destiny part of the journey towards an is an the an that you're gonna get at that an is going down with you that is coming up and out with you and that's where you're gonna end up is at the base of that mountain I'm coming with you wherever you go and for the rest of time Hashem says you're not on your own you don't have to figure it out by yourself I'm coming with you we got more done than usual but still came up short but we're getting better life is a journey we're trying to improve each and every week please remain to finish all saer tillum on this holy Roes Anda let's combine that energy to storm the heavens that hhm will give us yesh