Parsha Perspectives - Chukas

Okay, welcome back to partial perspectives for today. Thank you so much for your flexibility and our summer schedule. I'm sorry. Trying to keep everyone on their toes. No two weeks are the same. I'm so honored that there are people here and who've come to learn together, prepare the para and find perspectives for today. So, thank you. Thank you for your flexibility. Para series is gen sponsored by Becky and Aviatz and family in memory of Becky's father David Gman. Our learning should be Lu Lishmas, David Ben, and Manish. And of course, our learning continues to be in honor of our precious and holy soldiers and the merit of the return of our hostages in gratitude to Hashem for a victory over Iran and the heartfelt fel for a victory over all of our enemies. We are in paras page 838 in the art stone speaks to and he tells them this is the this is the of the whole Torah as God commanded when he spoke and he said take a pure unblenmished red hepher that has not uh had a yoke upon it that hasn't worked. It's unusual. They are even adumas today, believe it or not. People trying to grow them and identify them and have them ready to go when please God, we will need them. But our para begins with this very enigmatic, very mysterious law. A law in fact that's couched as being a is the Torah's use, the Torah's word for a mitzvah that doesn't have a reason. We have mitzvah that we comprehend. Mitzvah are rational mitzvah that we understand. And then there are mitzvah that defy comprehension. They make no sense. They make no sense. So that's why, and we've said this in the past, this is introduced as Torah. Even though it's only one mitzvah out of 613, it's called the of the whole Torah. Why? Because the attitude that we have and that we bring to this one mitzvah reflects our attitude that we bring to the totality of Torah. And I always understand, I always see this and try to explain it in the context of all the relationships that we have in life. If in a relationship we're only willing to obey, we're only willing to be obedient, we're only willing to comply with something when it makes sense to us, are we really in a relationship with the other or are we only in a relationship with ourself? If I only do things when they make sense, so I'm really serving myself, I'm not serving you. But when I'm willing to surrender, I'm willing to submit, I'm willing to compromise, I'm willing to sacrifice, I'm willing to do something even when it makes no sense, like having milk for dinner. So that's a relationship. I know it's not the morning, you're a little more tired. It's okay. You're allowed to laugh. So that's a relationship. So this is not only a this particular law but the attitude of this reflects on the whole relationship the totality of Torah. So it's called Zukas Torah. And Rashi a little bit later says let the mother come and clean up for the calf. Who's the calf that soiled the calf that made a mess? And who's the mother? The paradum that's now coming to clean it up. The calf of course is the ael, the sin of the golden calf. And the Jewish people panicked. Moshe didn't seem to be returning on schedule. And what were we going to do? We were missing that medium, that tangible connection, that physical contact for Hashem. So the people panicked and therefore they built their own, which of course we're not allowed to do. Theel, the ego is the calf. Let the paradum, the mother of the calf, come and clean. How does the paradum clean up for the calf? So the understanding a simple way of understanding is what was the mistake? What was the shortcoming? Where was the failure of theel this need to understand everything? What do you mean Moshe's not back? But I've got a plan. I've got spreadsheets. I've got a grid. I've got a schedule. I've got a calendar. I've got it all worked out. This is the way I want it to go. This is how I predict. This is how I anticipate. I want to be in control. I want to understand. I want to comprehend. That was our mistake. So when Moshe didn't return, we said, "Okay, we're still in control. Now we'll build the calf." Hashem comes and says, "You need to clean up for that mistake." And how do you clean up for it? By surrendering your will, surrendering your comprehension, submitting and surrendering your control. And how do we surrender and submit control? When we're willing to comply and be obedient, when we're willing to do even that which we don't and can't understand is mysterious. Now, in what way is the parad? Because here the par of the Torah goes on to tell us it's a paradoxical law. What happens? Somebody who's impure, someone who's had contact with a corpse with death and therefore has contracted spiritual impurity needs to be purified. How are they purified? The ashes of a perfectly red hepher mixed with other ingredients sprinkled on such a person on day three and day seven of their rehabilitation, their purification. That's how they become pure. Here's the paradox. The one who's impure becomes pure and the one who was pure who sprinkled it becomes impure. That's illogical. That makes absolutely no sense. If this sprinkling is enough to purify the impure, why should it make the pure impure? It makes no sense. And none other than the great Schlommo, the wisest, the smartest of all men said, he said, "I'll be wise. I'll be smart. I'll understand it. It was beyond my comprehension. I give up. I don't understand it. And it's we're willing to observe and to keep and to comply and to be obedient and to practice what we don't understand. That is a testament to the relationship. I don't need to understand. In a marriage, in a friendship, in a business partnership, in a relationship with Hashem, when we're only willing to do what makes sense to us, we're serving ourselves. We're not serving the other. But when someone says, "Could you do it my way? I know you don't understand. I know it doesn't make sense. I know it's not the way you want, but would you do it for me? And we say, absolutely. I don't understand it. It makes no sense. It offends my sensibilities, but you know what? It matters to you and it makes sense to you. That's good enough for me. I'm all in. And that's Rainefeld, whose new safer is coming out this week. Timely and timeless or timeless and timely. I helped Rabbi Bapolski come up with the title but I don't remember what we came up with timely and timeless or timeless and timely either way it's both timeless and timely his beautiful insights and perspectives been sharing for several years the greater winefeld so he says the para begins with says although The way the apher of the paradum functions as a what we do with that ash, the mixture, the concoction, the way it works is a ho beyond comprehension. We nevertheless could and should ask why it takes a to remove mace. In other words, if God wants to introduce a law that's incomprehensible, why does he choose to do it specifically in the area of removing the impurity that's contracted from contact with death? Why specifically is it surrounded by death? And Cesar of Weinfeld, an explanation could be as follows. In general, why is a mace matame? Why does a corpse, why is death create tuma? Why does death create impurity? What is negative about the mace? It could be that when a person is exposed to death, it brings down his spirit. It brings him to a point of despair and yish. In other words, when we confront our mortality, when we see that life is short and life is finite and how little control we have, it could lead to tremendous sense of despair. What's the point? Why bother? Why am I trying? Why am I giving up such pleasures in the pursuit of virtue? We're all going to die. We're all future worm food. We're all going to push up push-up daisies. Whatever expression you don't want to be thinking about, but will be true about every one of us. So that could lead to yayish, hopelessness and despair. What's the point? Why bother? You go to a funeral, you have contact with death, you hear of somebody, you're saying goodbye to someone you love. It could lead to yish. What's the point? When standing face to face with the unknown, a person feels out of control and it could be debilitating and it could be paralyzing. The encounter takes life out of his own life. Cesar Weinfeld, the exposure to the finite nature of human existence brings a person down. And that's why our spirit is defiled. Mace contact with a corpse creates tumah because it brings hopelessness and despair. A person dies even while they're alive. So when a person confronts mortality says what's the point and why bother and they therefore give up that giving up that despair brings death even within life and that's tum that's tuma that's spiritual defilement. Therefore, we take the paradum to remove tom which is the idea that we shouldn't passively take it in. We should actively engage the unknown and make it part of our spiritual experience. We take the unknown and the uncertainty and the mystery and we ritualize it with the paradum which is beyond room human understanding. We don't allow the mystery and the unknown to paralyze us. The unknown is transformed into a mystery which enhances our avote. So it's specifically a it's a law which is a hulk which defies comprehension which we use in order to reverse the impurity of death because lest we become hopeless and have despair through mortality instead we say life is short we lean in and we embrace the mystery and the unknown and we surrender and we recognize that with the acceptance that there's a god is the submission the acceptance the concession that I can't understand everything you know we live in a generation that wants to have it both ways. On the one hand, there's a God, there's a Hashem. We say nishmas, the miracles of the defeat of Iran, there's a God, there's a creator, there's a source of all existence. There's a Hashem. On the one hand, we want to express our faith. But on the other, we say, but I'm entitled to understand. I want to know why do bad things happen to good people? Why do good things happen to bad people? How does the world work? Teach me the mysteries. God, show me your face. to which Hashem answers, "Part of the belief of God is the concession and the recognition that if you believe in God, you can't and won't understand everything. We can't have it both ways. We want to put it into AI. Why did this bad thing happen to good people? Hey Siri, why does the world work this way? Hey GR, hey AI, tell me everything." Because AI, which people are concerned is going to become a religion and an alternative to God. People think they could ask it anything. And that's only increasing and promoting and expanding our sense of entitlement to understand everything. But religion ultimately is about surrender. Religion ultimately is about submission. Religion ultimately is the acceptance that there are things I can't and won't understand. That's what it means to believe in God. So the para begins by telling us if you are a student of Torah, if you're a person who lives a life of Torah, Torah and your life is guided and your life is regulated and your life is inspired by Torah, then you must embrace the Torah to be to live a life in which we surrender, submit. Hashem, I concede. I'll study. I'll try to understand. I'll ask questions. I'll learn. I'll explore. I have a curiosity and insatiable appetite. But in the end of the day when I've exhausted all the options, I recognize I surrender to you. And that is the mystery. So our mortality could lead to hopelessness or despair. Or our mortality could make us surrender and lean in further to that relationship with God. To embrace the mystery that is inherent in life. To be alive is to not understand everything that is happening in our lives. Turning the page. I really want to focus in the second half of the para which we didn't get to last year. But first a few more things. So the Torah is telling us exactly how this works. The paradum this red heer that has no m it has no blemish. That ash is mixed with these other ingredients. It's sprinkled on the one who is impure and says the Torah 1914. This is the teaching regarding a person who dies in a tent. Now, we're not talking about literally in a tent. We're talking about in a structure in a building underneath a covering. Anything that enters a tent and anything that is in the tent shall be contaminated for seven days. We know that one draws contamination from a corpse not only through contact, not only through carrying the corpse, but even by being under the same roof, even by being under the same building or covering. That's called tumas, being in the same building, which transmits tuma, spiritual contamination from the corpse of a Jew, not the corpse of a non-Jew. And that's relevant today. We spoke uh earlier paras how kohanim who are not allowed contact with tuma may not be able to go into a hospital of course that's to save their own life they can for their own treatment but to visit to be a chaplain they shouldn't because if there's a morg underneath that roof in that building the co is exposed that's why here my office is a separate technical building if you look between where we're sitting and my office you'll see the sky it's a separate building so that the auro and a casket and sit in there and a coin could attend a funeral even in here. They're not considered to be under the same roof because if you're under the same roof, whoever comes into that building structure is under that same edifice will contract the tuma which excludes a coane. Maybe a woman carrying a coane. Women are not included in that prohibition, but a pregnant woman who's carrying a little boy coane. Even a male co-en fetus is prohibited from contracting that tum would not be allowed to as well. So rather tells us our rabbis learns from here. This language this is the law. If a person expires, passes away underneath a covering anyone in that covering contracts the but from the formulation. If a person passes away in an Ora and this is the Torah. Soakish teaches from here. You see that in order for Torah to be alive. In order for Torah to be fulfilled, in order for Torah to have continuity, it needs to be you have to kill yourself over it. Kill yourself over it. You know, it's not as easy as AI. And you can't just download to a thumb drive all the information. If you really want to become an expert in anything, you have to work hard. You have to kill yourself. That's the language that we use even in the vernacular. A dig a diligent student, a disciplined student will describe themselves as killing themselves. Oh, it's finals. Oh, I'm trying to master this ma. Oh, I'm trying to graduate. Oh, I'm trying to get a good score. Person has to kill themselves. So, a person who wants to for Torah to be fulfilled. It's not casual. Can't sit back on the recliner. Can't be half asleep. Can't be listening with one ear. Person has to be engaged, engrossed. person has to sweat, tears, work and all that is derived as learned from this verse. This is the Torah. If a person's willing to kill himself in the says of what is the connection between the obscure, mysterious, incomprehensible law of the red heer and this teaching that a person who wants to really accept and receive Torah has to kill himself over it. Why specifically here other disciplines you can memorize, you can learn it quickly. You have pneummonics and tricks and and shortcuts and there are ways that you can cram and crash the learning and you can get it. and other disciplines you can learn once and hold on to, you can grasp, you can keep. The only way to acquire Torah, the only way to make it not something on loan to you, but part of your permanent collection is to kill yourself over it. Is to work hard, is to toil, is to which is what the says in Miguel. and only believe a person who says I worked hard and you have to review review and review and again review and if you don't review how quickly it fades you remember what we said in last week's par those who learn the daff this morning do you remember what daff is let alone what's in it without how quickly it dissipates and disappears. It takes effort and review and toil and more review and discipline and a schedule of review. If you learn and don't review, it's like you plant and you never harvest. Even somebody with an incredible memory, if you don't review, you will forget. That's not a question. It's not an if to when that's unusual. That's something only true about Torah. And that's why it says then the Torah. It's specifically here where we have a law that's mysterious. That's incomprehensible. It doesn't make sense that we're learning this principle that if you want to have Torah, if you want it to be permanent, you got to kill yourself because that in itself is a Why does that make sense? Why are you able to download other information? You can retain other disciplines without killing yourself. But Torah was designed in such a way that the only way to have a mastery over it is to review and review and work hard and toil and be engaged and be engrossed and be involved. Why is that? All of that is a which is why specifically it was taught here. It's it doesn't make sense. If I'm able to gain mastery over other disciplines that work, why does Torah demand work? It doesn't make sense exactly. And that's why it that principle is ruled is learned specifically here from a place that is a from a place that is a why does Torah demand effort? Because when it comes to other disciplines, the only thing that matters is the outcome. If you're a student of math and you're learning mathematical formulas and you're preparing to try to kill it on the ACT or the SAT or the math AP and you can't get the formula, you can't figure it out. No matter how many tutors, no matter how many practice tests, no matter how much you tried, no matter how you much you watched, what's it called? Khan Academy. No matter what you did, whatever shortcuts you took, no matter how much you reviewed, in the end of the day, when your hand in the test, the answer you got is wrong. Then it means all that time was wasted. All that matters is your final score. All that matters is did you have an answer to the could you solve the equation? When it comes to Torah, it's not about the outcome at all. When it comes to Torah, it's all about the effort. It's about the effort. You went to the shir. You tried to understand. You prepared in advance. You reviewed a little bit afterwards. And you know what? You still don't fully a difficult a hard toos a complicated ribbis and you I have to grade the ribbis and you still don't understand it. You worked hard and you still don't understand it. Do you say it was all a waste? Why' I bother going to the dafomi 2711 pages and I don't remember anything? The answer is it's the effort. It's the toil. It's the work that you put in. That's why we say it. That's what the explains. What does it mean? We say it every sem. We toil, they toil. We toil and we're rewarded. They toil and they're not rewarded. What are you talking about? There are people that toil and they reap tremendous reward. So what does it mean that we toil, we're rewarded, they toil, they don't. It means exactly this. If you toil, you shvitz, you break your teeth over that math equation and you can't solve it, you wasted your time. But if you're working hard on that gumar and you don't fully understand it, every second was worthwhile. Every second was valuable. All that toil, that effort, that is exactly the purpose. It's not the outcome. It's the effort that matters. And that's what's unusual, unique, and distinct about Torah. Torah requires a it requires work and discipline. And why is it designed in that way? That's a just like ultimately that is ultimately that is a these also has a comment here says here we're saying that if you want Torah to be permanent if you want to acquire Torah you need to kill yourself over it. Ah but I thought we saw the whole purpose and goal of Torah is to give you life. So which is it? Does learning Torah give you life or are you supposed to kill yourself over it? Which one? Which one? The language is Torah is only acquired by a person who is willing to kill means himself of Yseph and many others. You know what it means? If you want to learn Torah, you have to negate your sense of self. If you're going to open Torah and say, "I have all the answers. I know everything. I'm super smart. I have the correct perspective. I have the life wisdom and life experience. Okay. Now, let's see what the Torah has to say. And I'm now going to make Torah conform to my opinions, to my to my preconditions, to what I'm walking in with, then I'll never acquire Torah. To acquire Torah, you have to get rid of your ego. You have to get rid of your ego. If you come to Torah with a sense of ego and arrogance, if you come to Torah with an attitude, I have all the answers, you'll never acquire. You'll never learn Torah. Person has to come and approach Torah like a blank slate. Torah, teach me. Inscribe yourself on me. Torah, what do you have to say to illuminate and open my eyes to what I should think and feel, how to behave, what to do? Torah, I come to you like a blank slate. So, what you need to kill is not yourself. Torah gives life. God forbid we're killing ourselves over acquiring Torah. We don't kill ourselves over acquiring Torah. What are we killing? The ego. Because ego is the enemy. Written a book called ego is the enemy. Ego is edging God out. Ego undermies all relationship. Ego is the kryptonite that makes us self-destruct, self-sabotage. Ego gets in the way of living our best lives and our best selves. When we have an ego, we've edged God out. That ego gets in the way. So the very first step Allah in order to acquire Torah. What's the first thing you have to do? Allah. The very first thing we have to do is overcome the ego. Overcome the ego. Doesn't mean you can't have pride in your hard work and accomplishments. That's not ego. Doesn't mean you can't have confidence in what you're doing and working on. That's not ego. Ego is when you think you're in charge. You're in control. You don't need God. And you don't see that the blessings that you have come from God. Ego is when you think it's all about you. You're the source of it all. and that it's with you forever as long as you want it. That's ego. And when a person has an ego, they've edged God out. Ego is the enemy. Ego undermines all relationships. So the first step in acquiring Torah, if I want to acquire Torah, I've got to get rid of all that I bring in my whole attitude. I've got to get rid of all of my my um my my addictions, all of my my predilictions, all of all of this attitude. You can't be in the pursuit of all the pleasures of this world and in parallel learn Torah. In order to download Torah, you need enough memory, enough gig. You know, if you want to download My kids who take a billion pictures a minute then each come to me and say, "I'm out of memory on my phone." They haven't invented phones with enough memory for what they want to be able to have for their music and their pictures and their videos and everything else. So, if you want to acquire, what do you know? You need to have you need to have the memory. You need to have a clay. You need to have a vessel, an instrument, a technology, something that can hold what you want to download. So if we want to download Torah, if we want to be to be then what do we need to know that we have enough capacity, enough memory? So we have to kill the sense of we have to kill the physical, the material to be aligned spiritual. And when it's a person who sees themsself as a soul that has a body, not a body that is a soul, it's the person who's connected spiritually whose antenna is extended to the source of all. When we kill, when we're able to negate and overcome that ego and that materialism and that that uh that sense of identity, then we're able to download Torah from there. Uh sh alter No, we'll go. Okay. Keep turning the page. Page 842. The Jewish people come to the wilderness of sin in the first month and they settle in Kadesh, the name of a place. And what happens there? The great prophetess Mosha's sister Miriam passes away. every year paras even though I know it's about to happen it smacks me in the face I'm not gonna tell you how old I am but I'm not a young man anymore and nevertheless I'm still surprised every year because here we are going nicely along and it feels like we just were taken out of Egypt we just had we just went down to we just had the 10 plagues in the splitting of the sea we just started our we just made it through okay complaining and safer midbar. All of a sudden, we're at the end of the 40 years. Do you know that from the last puss that we read until here, do you know how much time passed in the desert? 38 years. We just lived 38 years in 3 seconds. We just flew through time. So much so that we're at the end of this journey. Miriam dies. Spoiler alert. Aon dies. Moshe, we hold on to till the end of But Miriam and Aaron, what do you mean? It's in their merit. These righteous people, they've accompanied us. They've taken us out. They've been with us on this journey. Smacks you. It smacks you in the face. That Miriam passes away here. And she's buried there. And what happens immediately afterwards? What's the next? People say, "One second, we're out of water. They're so thirsty." And they they now gather against Mosha, which is their favorite pastime, the greatest hobby in the Midbar. They fight with him. They fight with Moshe. If only we had perished as our brothers perished before us. Whoever's left at this point, we're talking about the end of the 40 years. We just fast forward 38 years. This is the original double speed. Between the last section and this section is the original, you know, going double speed. We just flew through 38 years. And now the whole generation who were alive forag the sin of the spies whom God punished and promised they die in the midbar in the desert. They died. All that's left of the generation that are ultimately going in. And what happens? Miriam dies. They bury her. And all of a sudden they realize I'm parched. So thirsty. There's nothing to drink. We need something to drink. Moshe, what's the matter with you? There's no diet peach snapple. There's nothing to drink. There's nothing here. There's no water. We're dying of thirst. What was the point? Maybe we should have died with everyone who died before us. Why'd you bring us into a desert to die? You brought us here to die, us and our animals. You took us out of Egypt to bring us to this terrible place, a desolate desert. You brought us to this place. There's no seed. There's no fig. There's no grape. There's no pomegranate. And there's no water to drink. which by the way is a question maybe we'll get to maybe not but it started with Miriam dies and they say so thirsty there's nothing to drink and all of a sudden before they return to the complaint about there's nothing to drink and there's no pomegranate and there's no grapes and there's no figs and there's no seat now they want a hmmor what happened a moment ago all they had was a little thirst there's nothing to drink and now they forgot thirst thirst becomes the last thing on the list and there's nothing to drink pome that's what you need in the desert pomegranate Pomegranate. You know, I've taken my kids on a hike. We drive our kids a long distance. They're in the back of the car. I'm so thirsty. There's nothing to drink. My kids in all their years have never said, "And there's no pomegranates, and there's no figs, and there's no grapes. I'm so thirsty. I hear there's no pomegranates. There's no grapes. What do you mean? Why'd you take us out of Egypt? Why'd you take us out of out of Egypt? What's going on here?" Cesar Saxs, Lord Saxs and the Saxs Kush. Immediately after the account of Miriam's death, we read there was no water for the community. Together they confronted Mosha. A famous tidic passage of explains that it was in Miriam's merit that the Jewish people had a well of water that miraculously accompanied them through the desert journeys. Why is it a coincidence Miriam dies, there's no water. There was no one to pay the water bill. No one realized she was the one taking care of all along. Now she dies and there's no water. sort of. It's not that she was the one paying the water bill, but she was the one paying the water bill. She paid the water bill through her merit, through her worthiness. She paid the water bill. Her existence is what made the people worthy of that water. And now that she's gone, now that she's no longer here, the water stops. The spigot is shut off. When Miriam died, the water ceased. This interpretation reads the sequence of events supernaturally. Miriam died, then there was no water. From this you can infer that until then there was water because Miriam was alive. It was a miracle in her merit. However, there's another way of reading the passage. The connection between Miriam's death and the events that follow it may have less to do with a miraculous well and more to do with Moshe's response to the complaints of the Jewish people. Let us recall who Miriam was for Moshe. She was his elder sister who watched over his fate as he floated down the Nile in a pitched basket. She had the presence of mind, the audacity to speak to Parro's daughter and arranged the child to be nursed by a Jewish woman, Moshe's own mother, Yv. Without Miriam, Moshe would have grown up not knowing who he was. Miriam is a background presence throughout much of the narrative. We see her leading the women in song at Yamsuf. So, it was clear that she, like Aaron, has a leadership role. We gain a sense of how much she means to Moshe when she's punished after she and Aron spoke against Moshe. Aron turns helplessly to Moshe asked him to intervene on her behalf which he does. Moshe still cares deeply for her. Leaders need confidence. Rambam his commentary in the mission in Aos counts this as one of the four kinds of friendship. He calls it a friendship of trust and describes it as having someone in whom you have absolute trust with whom you are completely open and unguarded knowing that the other person will neither take advantage of the confidence shared nor shares them with others. A careful reading of this episode within the broader context of Mosha's early life suggests that Miriam was Mosha's trusted friend, the source of his emotional stability. Yet only in this week's para do we begin to get a full sense of her influence. And this only by implication. For the first time when the people complain of thirst, Moshe faces a challenge without Miriam. And for the first time, he loses emotional control in the presence of the people. This is one of the effects of bereiement. Berieved, you lose control of your emotions. You find yourself angry when the situation calls for calm. You hit when you should speak and speak when you should be silent. The Ra in another context mentions the does not rest upon us when we're in a state of grief. The loss of a sibling can be less expected and more profoundly disorienting than even the loss of a parent. And Miriam was no ordinary sibling. Moshe owes her his life and his identity. Without Miriam, Moshe could never have become the human face to God, human face of God to the Jewish people, lawgiver, liberator, prophet. Losing her, he not only lost his sister, he lost the human foundation of his life. This is why despite facing the rock and thirst twice before Moshe for the first time loses emotional control. By Sax is explaining so brilliantly because what happens? Miriam dies. She's buried. People complain so thirsty. There's nothing to drink. We want pomegranates and figs and grapes. Why'd you take us out of Egypt? We should have killed us with the rest of the people. And Moshe can't take it. God says speak to the rock and water will come out. And what does he do? He hits the rock. Shimore. Listen now you rebellious ones. and he smacks the rock. And there are countless suggestions offered for what he did wrong. But the Ramom says he indulged anger. He got frustrated and angry at this encourageable people and he lashed out at them. Why was Moshe able to able to hold it together until now? Wonders, Rabbi Sachs, what was different here throughout Sephora Midbar, the people, they're impossible. They're encouraable. He can't take it. And yet he keeps it together. Only now does he lose his cool and it costs him cost him everything. He's unable to lead them into the promised land because of it. Cost him everything. Why did he lose his cool? Cesar by Sax. You know why? Because he lost his sister. He had lost his confidant. He lost his equilibrium. He lost the person who kept him balanced. He lost the person that he turned to to talk things out, to calm him down, to give him hope, to help him regulate. And without Miriam, he lost his cool in that in that moment. In that moment, Miriam was the one. Miriam was the one. Unlike the death of Aaron and Moshe that described the people mourning and grieving, the Torah just reports her passing and seems to move right on. She dies. She's buried there. And there's no water. They're crying. They're fetching. They're complaining. They're miserable. Where's the water? Rashi says, Miriam from here we see that for all 40 years they had water. Why the Bayer of Miriam they had a Zephr Hills water cooler that went with them wherever they went. Could you imagine miraculously you didn't have to pack it on the flight on the cruise in the car on the hike on the walk wherever you go. There's a Zephr Hills. I don't get any royalties from Zephr Hills. You could choose your brand. There's a water cooler that comes with them wherever they go. That was called the Bay Air. the well and in whose merit did it exist? Miriam theak here elaborates the writes the people failed to mourn and grieve for Miriam adequately. So they were punished through the loss of that water. They failed to mourn and grieve adequately as you see in the fat. She died she's buried. Nobody stopped. Nobody sat sha nobody mourned or grieved when it came to motion. they were inconsolable and yet with Miriam they seem to move right on and so it's mida mida as they came to understand her greatness and that they only had to access to water in the desert because of her continues by telling us the reason was called the reason it was called What came in this? She excelled at she's someone who nurtured and nourished who cared for who was sensitive and kind and just like the always flowed from her the flow of water ended. So while she was alive and the was flowing emanating from her so the water the well flowed and the moment that she dried up she died the well also dried up. There was no water. But perhaps I humbly submit to you this fine evening. Again, thank you for your flexibility. Thank you to Rabbi Brody. I know his kids are going to start before the hall. I appreciate it. Perhaps the absence of water wasn't a punishment for a failure to grieve. Maybe it was the fulfillment of it. We asked the question, the Torah only tells us Miriam died and she's buried, but it doesn't mention any crying over her loss. But maybe there is an expression of crying. Maybe they do grieve. Remember this is an adolescent people that are still maturing. They're finding their words. They're getting comfortable in their own skin. Maybe it's a greater expression of mourning than realizing just how much the person meant how radically and utterly different the quality of life is without them. The way they mourned and grieved was by saying, "Oh my goodness, all the water all the years was only in her merit and we never realized it and we never appreciated it and we never said thank you to her for it." So their complaint was not maybe actually a complaint. It was a sort of immature or unsophisticated way of saying we miss Miriam. We miss Miriam. Any parent in here knows that if or when a child lashes out. You have to separate out what they're saying and how they're saying it from the fact that they're calling for attention. They need a little love and affection. They're looking for validation. there's a problem they're trying to solve, but they can't necessarily put in words. So, instead, it's coming out as lashing out. You're packing them to send them to camp. And instead of saying, "Thank you for taking a mortgage on the house to afford to send me to sleep away camp." They're all stressed out and nervous and packing. They can only fit into 16 duffles. How can they take all 40 outfits? How will they fit everything? So, they're being a little bit uh harsh with the very people who are killing themselves to send them away. But realize, it's stress. It's the stress and it's their nervousness and it's their anxiety about going to camp, socially fitting in, separated out from what they're saying here. The people present as if they're complaining to Hashem, so thirsty, there's nothing to drink and there's no pomegranates. But really, what they're saying is, we miss Miriam. We just realized that all this time we were hydrated. We were nurtured and nourished. We were taken care of. It was all her. And now she's gone. And we're so thirsty. And we're so parched. and we're so dehydrated and we're so lost and we're so weak and we're so dizzy. Until now, there was plenty of water. But with Miriam's death, the well literally went dry. The people struggled to quench their thirst. And they understood now what they had neglected and taken for granted all 40 years. They understood who she was, the value she had, the difference she made. Maybe their cries and complaints were not the negativity of an adolescent immature people. Maybe they were the people's expression of grief and loss and pain. Something more, something extraordinary in the story that could easily be overlooked. And it's the following. Miriam was one person. One woman was responsible for keeping two to three million people alive for 40 years. One person was responsible for their life, for their vitality. Never underestimate, never dismiss the power and difference that one person can make. One person. Miriam kept us alive in the desert. But much more than that, like Rabbi Sax alluded to, she was responsible for our entire existence even earlier when her father Amram withdrew from her mother Yed. In the heart of the servitude and subjugation in the middle of that suffering when they when when her father am said I'm not having more children in this in this world not having more children how can we bring children into the slavery and subjugation who is the one who convinced her father and mother she went to her mother and said you have to beautify yourself you have to seduce my father your husband you can't give up on continuity the future is bright and she said to her mother Miriam them. You know, you and Abba are worse than parro. Parro is only killing and executing the men, but you're you're putting an end to the boys and girls. You're eliminating everyone. And as a result, our parents reunited, yielding the birth of Moshe. And based on their example, other couples did, too. And the very survival and continuity of our people all came about in whose merit? None other than Miriam. The continuity and survival of the Jewish people was because of Miriam. Because she cared. She cared as a little girl who told her parents reunite and she cared in her merit when the was flowing from her and because of her the the water flowed to the people and when she was gone it was gone. It was gone. But look at the impact the lesson maybe of Miriam is the impact that one person can have. One person one person can have. If you stop, if you say hello, if you check in, if you're kind, if you notice somebody who's alone and who feels neglected, one person, the difference that one person can make in Miriam's merit, two to three million people were kept alive. I wrote an article, I quoted the story, but I'll tell it again here in this context very quickly. In 1951, a 14-year-old Australian boy named James Harrison had a major surgery to save his life and remove one of his lungs. and he was alive thanks in large part to a vast quantity of transfused blood that he received. He was hospitalized for three months, but when he came out, he was determined to pay it forward and to do it by donating blood himself. Problem was that you couldn't donate blood till you're 18 years old. So as soon as he turned 18, he made good on the promise and despite his fear of needles, he began to donate blood regularly. In the time doctors in Australia were struggling to figure out why thousands of births in the country were resulting in miscarriages, still births, brain defects. In 1967, they discovered the babies were suffering from the hemolytic disease of the newborn HDN. The condition arises with a woman with an Rh- negative blood type becomes pregnant with the baby with an Rh positive blood type and the incompatibility causes the mother to reject the fetus's red blood cells and it creates these miscarriages, still births and brain defects in the baby. So they discovered doctors, there's a very rare antibbody in blood that could be used to make a life-saving medication called antid that when given to the mothers in their pregnancy who were at the risk of developing HDN, it would keep the baby safe. And they scoured blood blanks to see whose blood might contain the antibbody. And they found this one donor, this is James Harrison, who overcame his fear of needles and who paid it forward by donating regularly. And they asked them to participate in this experimental program. And for more than 60 years, listen to this. For more than 60 years, Harrison donated blood every single week. And his plasma was used to make millions of anti-D injections. Every ample of anti-D ever made in Australia has a piece of James Harrison's blood in it. And because of that, 17% of pregnant women in Australia require the injections. The Australian Blood Service estimates that Harrison has helped save 2.4 4 million babies in the country. At 81 years old, after donating 1100 times, despite wanting to continue, he was forced to retire from donating blood. He was nicknamed the man with the golden arm, and he passed away last year. But the man with the golden arm, one man who had this very unusual and rare blood type was able to save 2.4 million babies. One person. One person. because he went to pay it forward, donated blood regularly, saved 2.4 million babies. Miriam, one woman in whose merit two to three million people survived. And therefore, maybe here these complaints are not actually complaints. We're thirsty. We're tired. But maybe it's the people's expression of grief and loss. Where's Miriam? Pushed. We're thirsty. We're dehydrated. We're lost. We're dizzy. Where's Miriam? We miss and we need Miriam. Mosha and Aaron are told to speak to the rock, but instead what do they do on the top of page 844? They take the staff and they gather everyone and he says, "Listen you rebellious ones from this rock. Should we bring out water?" The Ram says he got angry. Others say it was arrogance. He didn't say, "Should God draw water?" What does he say? Noty. Noty is we should we as if he and Aaron are squeezing water out of this rock. And there are at least a hundred different suggestions offered for what Moshe did wrong. So much so that one of the commentaries writes Moshe made one mistake and we ascribe a hundred wrong things to him. He made one mistake, but because there's so many suggestions and opinions of what it might be, it comes out as this horrible villain of all these things maybe where he went wrong. He smacks the rock instead of speaking to it. Water comes out. The people are are fed are hydrated as are their animals. But Hashem is not happy. [Music] speaks to motion. You didn't believe in me to sanctify me in the eyes of the Jewish people. Like that, it's all gone. Mosha's whole dream, his life work, his whole effort was to lead the people to the promised land. And just like that, it's all over. It's gone. Why? Because he hit the rock instead of speaking to it. which Hashem says is a failure of you didn't believe in me. You failed to believe in me. Writes there's a double a double argument God has. You don't believe me. I said you could speak to it. What would have been a bigger miracle if you spoke to the rock? Some commentators say that was the problem. If you hit a rock and water comes out, it's not such a miracle. Why? Maybe behind the rock is a stream is a uh a Mayan, a spring. And maybe when you crack the rock, water came out. You know, when you drive to your shalim to Modí on 443, you'll see cars pull over on the side of the highway because there's a rock there that water comes out and it's the freshest, coldest, purest. People are filling up bottles from that water. Every time I drive on 443 to Modí, you'll fill up your water bottle. Rabbi Broady from that spring and you see people and every time I think pious kukas water coming forth from a rock. So when you hit the rock and water comes out. Pretty impressive. Hasn't happened yet. Actually it did happen in the construction. But that was called they broke a water man. It had to be repaired. No miracle in that. Just the water getting shut off. It was annoying. But you can hit a rock and water comes out. It's pretty impressive. But you could easily ascribe it to you cracked the rock and it was a spring. But to speak to the rock would be a greater miracle. You would have increased their amuna. They would have become believers. And not only that, you would have made there's a double complaint. Hashem has a double criticism. Why? Number one, a lack of faith and number two it would have been a Torah or based on this this is along the lines of the famously comments says that in the future in the world to come when we meet our creator we're going to have to answer for we're going to pay judgment and what's judgment and we're going to have to give a calculation. What's the difference between judgment and calculation? So the grass says din is accountable for what we did wrong. Is accountable for what we could have done right in that same time. if we wasted time, if we looked at the wrong thing, if we said the wrong thing, if we spent money on the wrong thing, we're accountable for the mistake, for what we did wrong, but we're also accountable for what we could have done right with that time, with that money, with that effort. And that's what Hashem says here, says the a double criticism. Number one, you didn't have amuna. And number two, you failed to make a keshm. Not only what you did wrong by hitting it instead of speaking to it, but what you could have done right, they'd still be talking about it all these years later. The miracle of speaking to the rock and look what happened. The water came out. They would have been talking about that would have been talking about that miracle. That miracle. The has two pieces in I don't understand. They made a mistake. They hit the rock instead of speaking to it. And because they hit the rock instead of speaking to it, Hashem therefore concludes they didn't believe in him. This is Mosha we're talking about. Moshe is the nohatra. Moshe is the one who transmitted Torah. And because he made a simple mistake, maybe not so simple. Do you take away you challenge his whole faith? It's a long distance between saying should have spoken not hid it and you had no faith in God. If you have an opportunity to sanctify God's name, if you could give him credit, if you could lean on him, if you could pray to him and you don't, it's because you don't believe in him. If a person really believed in him, they would give him credit. they would turn to him. If a person fails to take the opportunity and invitation to sanctify God's name, it reveals a little bit of a lack of faith. Here he quotes the gives the similar expression. You didn't display faith in me. You should have spoken to the rock instead of hidden it hit it. And second of all, you could have made a big keshm. So when we make a mistake, when we do something wrong, if you don't hold the door, you don't say please and thank you. Your word is not your bond. You're not honest in business. You don't sanctify God's name. First of all, you make it you leave a negative impression and you fail to have made a positive impression. There's a double sword. It's not one thing. It's the negative impression and the failure to have used that same interaction to make a positive a positive impression. And that's what Mosha and Aaron could have done could have done in that moment and they failed to do. Okay, one more quick idea. Which one should we do? Uh let's do we have three incidents of going to war. Three requests that the Jewish people make in our para to cut through the land of others. The Canaanite king of Arat who dwelt in the south heard that the Jewish people had come by the root of the spies and he wared against Israel fought a war and he took captive from it says Rashi Zalik. Now it says the Kanani heard but it wasn't really the Kanani. It was really a malik who were sitting in the negvanan but they didn't speak they spoke cananani. Why? So the Jewish people would dive into hashem that they would defeat the canananim. And this was a ruse. It was a trick. Sounds like a msad operation. What happened? They Malik were in the guise of Cananan so that the Jewish people would dive in to defeat Cananan not knowing it was really Amalik and therefore Amalik would be able to defeat them. Says of Jacob of Baltimore. Why does God care who you were domining to defeat? In the end of the day the Jewish people were domining to win the war to defeat the enemy. Why does it matter? They spelled out the wrong enemy. You got the wrong enemy. You thought you were asking God, help us defeat Kanan. But it turns out it was Amalik in the guise of Kanan. And therefore Amalik had the upper hand. It matters says, you see from here when you d him to Hashem, a person has to be specific. You have to be accurate. You have to be precise with your request. Which is why one should always qualify their request. Conception expanded person is looking to make a to have a child ask I want to marry this person I'm trying to get this job I want to have a baby in this time period but only on condition that this is good for me don't ask for things which may not be in your own interest you're going to ask specifically for that job maybe that job is going to be your end. Maybe that job is going to rob you of your serenity. Maybe that job is going to land you in jail. Be careful what you wish for. You may get it. So qualify everything you wish for with God. If it's good for me, if it's right for me, help this sh help that child. Help this. If God, it's good for me. But only if it's good for me. Qualify every with if it's good for me. Because that was the mistake here. They d defeat Cananan. But it wasn't Cananan. It was a malik. And you see that a person has to be absolutely precise with our we have to end precisely on time because we're continuing with again. Thank you for your flexibility with the parir begin in a few minutes.