Living With Emunah (Part 327) - Hashem Makes Us Each a Playlist

okay good morning boero welcome back to living with amuna so great to be back together again our amuna support group coming together to work to learn to grow in our feeling in our faith that Hashem is by our side is involved in every conversation is with us wherever we go he's not only on the journey with us that would be to understate his role Hashem is not only present on our journey through life he is responsible for our footsteps he is learning leading this journey he is determining where we go next he's taking us on whatever will be our roote theun series joury sponsored by Dr zavi and Bella Morgan in memory of Dr Brian galet in memory of Bella's mother Dr Ellen chanler as every week we are very very grateful to the Morgans this morning is also sponsored by Ida wax commemoration of the Year site of her husband caner laser wax our beloved caner wax what an incredibly special man of Survivor someone had a great impact on all of us the sh alah and the Merit of mos should have success in all of his Endeavors and by burtz Ma to Amanda Bergman and Yoshi Melman on their engagement ma ma we should celebrate many more should also a very happy birthday today I understand there's a significant birthday fora pitch a very happy birthday very happy birthday for Simone Brody where's Simone happy birthday to Simone Brody happy birthday to ham tanam though he's not here but when you turn 96 you get a happy birthday even if you're not here too so K Bo many many more years to come okay we're going to start as we always do with some letters some emails um you know some people I sometimes get cynical comments like get to the text people are coming to a they make a Tor they want to learn they want to grow in Torah what's with the emails this is not like some book club what are we reading emails what are we entertaining so I want to just share again that to me the emails are a safer they're also learning when people are practicing and they're implementing and they're executing on what we're learning about in theory that they're actually living with amuna it's the name of the sheir they're living with amuna to be living with amuna that is incredibly incredibly inspiring hi thank you for helping me grow Mya muscle blah blah blah I have two stories for you today the first is necessary for the second we'll try to go quickly because I know we want to get to the text suus I got a message from a friend in mod her Torah teacher from New York was looking for someone in bees to help her buy gifts for children father was fighting in Lebanon I said I would be happy to help I messaged the woman in New York and asked for more details AST astoundingly she was looking for delivery not only in my city not only in my neighborhood on my street and most amazingly to my daughter's F friend who had made my daughter sh the way the dots all connected was incredible I was so grateful to have been part of this heavenly constructed puzzle which is a great great phrase a Heavenly constructed puzzle in the end the grandmother decided to take the children to the toy store to pick the gifts and I was not even needed but how incredible this had been was remarkable the way hasm had perfectly connected all the dots for this to happen this beautiful incident reminded me that Hashem is in the details it was a wink a hug and a smile from Hashem which is how we're meant to live our lives there are no coincidences nothing's random or chance everything is from Hashem and meant to be the beginning of this week we surrounded a local family as they buried their son who had fallen in Gaza the loss and Devastation is massive a couple days later we took our son to draft into the army he's the first soldier in our family he's been waiting for this day for years he cannot wait to be trained as a foot soldier and to be an active Soldier what an emotional morning it was our son is drafting during a war and real Combat is where he's headed at the draft he met up with all of his friends loads of photos were taken the anticipation the excitement was palpable the B the beniva from different yeshivas were singing and dancing together with their R and fathers I just want to say there's a war and with no judgment or criticism but we know several Wars in this country where a lot of people all of a sudden decided they needed to be Rabin ordained or needed a PhD in a subject they weren't really so interested in or whatever else they could do to avoid being drafted into a war no judgment no criticism there's a war in Israel and young men with their parents with their reim are lining up to be drafted to have a privilege to protect the Jewish people me you thr young and young men and women Thank you Lisa songs of excitement in the Navy in the Army absolutely songs of excitement Victory love of their land and love of their people and service of Hashem while they sang and danced I begged hm for their safety and safety all of our soldiers they finally barded the bus and drove away I was filled with pride and fear what an emotional day it was later that afternoon he called me devastated his BMI body mass index was too high and they wanted to drop his profile unfortunately Army uses the BMI calculation which doesn't take into account muscle mass but that's the way the Army works and there's nothing to be done about it he managed to negotiate listen to this he got 11 days in which to lose seven kilo he was on his way home again mik what what kid doesn't say I tried I wanted combat I went for it what could I do I wasn't accepted my BM what can I do too many muscles what can I do my BMI was what and these kids are these young people not kids how they're kids they're bigger men women than many of us will ever be they're not kids they're walking around Israel they're on a bus or a train or at a cafe like they're nobody's and these are heroes these are extraordinary people so many thoughts were flying through my head would he manage to meet this crazy goal if he did would he be put back with his friends or put in a different combat unit would he maybe just be safer because a different unit than they wanted to put them in there were no guarantees in this War I don't know they answer any of these questions I didn't know what to DAV in for and then I remembered the Su his Toy Story and I remembered Hashem is in the details my son is exactly where he's meant to be hasem has put my son in the situation it's all from Hashem we're on day three of his 11 days and I don't know what's going to pan out he's working on his weight loss doing and learning I know it's all from Hashem and the outcome is from Hashem I repeatedly ask hasm to take care of my child put him where he's meant to be and then I give it back to Hashem and let goem is in the details this is from him my son is exactly where he's meant to be and so am I when I focus on this I can let go and breathe what a mother what a son or the Jewish people normally Jewish Mothers say s eat eat eat this Jewish mother saying stop eating stop eating stop eating no but it's what what we are where we're meant to be and if it works out and he gets in it's where he's meant to be and if it doesn't it's where he's meant to be and last week I put ala on the spot and she came through as always and we're working on a decal for the windshield of your cart car you are where you're meant to beov encountered the place I didn't share it here but I'll I'll detour with t quickly I shared it last week yobu encounters the place and there he introduces the prayer that of the nighttime prayer introduced Shak when the sun is high in the sky when we have Clarity and confidence when the day is filled with hope and optimism and promise of what will be AB says go Shak introduces it's twilight the Sun is setting it's still day it's sort of night it's a transition period what will be there's the accomplishment of the day but the unknown of the night and then Yakov comes along he's running away from his brother who wants to kill him he's on his own this young introvert who grew up sitting in tent studying Torah we picture this Meek pale Yeshiva Baker and now he's on the road on his way fighting for his life and he finds the place and he says I didn't know God was here turns out God is here I didn't even know he has this dream of a Stairway to Heaven of a ladder Bridging Heaven and Earth God is here and I didn't know I had no idea I had no idea I had no idea the Bon of Caren says what does it mean to encounter the place he says what yob introduces for us is wherever you are is where you're meant to be our mom is where we are that turns out to be your neighbor that's your job that's your coworker that's your extended family member that's the person sitting next to you in Shir at the Amun that's where the red light or the traffic jam or the canceled flight by you've encountered a place you need to know that God is in that place wherever you are you're not stuck you're not lost it's where you're meant to be now we can't fit all that on a decal you gotta still see out of the windshield something somewhat so we can't fit all that in the detail but you are where you're meant to be got a great image we'll make a decal you stick it right under your three car pools and four Atlantic bridge tolls and seven whatever and when you look out that windshield and the red light is taking too long the person in front of you is going too slow or the traffic is not moving or you made a wrong ter and just added 15 minutes to your time you look at that decal and we remember I want to make it a magnet for a fridge too but no appliances have metal anymore if anyone has any other ideas where else to put that what else should we make that where else do we feel stuck I know your passport your boarding pass on your mirror where else can we put that okay back to so this this mother about her son he's not stuck if he loses the 11 the the seven kilo in 11 days hopefully in a healthy way then he'll be where he's met wherever it is will be where he's meant to be ever since listening to the of I try to talk to my nine-year-old son in the Lang the other day I needed a certain amount of disposable plates to set the table and we hadj just the right amount I proudly proclaimed to my son Hashem just gave us a wink the exact amount we needed my son challenged me he said in the past I described hm's kindness as a hug who are we to say this particular kindness was only a wink in my mind everything from Hashem is a great Pig hug I wasn't sure how to answer him I told him I'd post this question to the r in an email he's patiently waiting for the R's answer when is it a wink when is it a hug when is it a kiss it is what you feel you needed to be in that moment how's that I don't know I didn't see in a safer when it's what I don't know sometimes you want to hug sometimes you say sometimes you need a kiss it is what you needed to be in that moment but it's from Hashem it's a metaphor so there's small things there are big things there's a great big bear hug there's a small little a kiss or a wink from across sometimes Hashem feels like he's across a room but he's just winking he's just winking at you sometimes he's right there embracing you he's right there holding you some of the bring down I understand the audience I'm speaking to but that when a person when a man puts on a Talis and he wraps himself in the Talisa there's antifa one wraps you put over your head you throw over your shoulder you're not supposed to you see some people they do that in one motion they wrap and unwrap and they're running and they're late and they're catching up and what no supposed to wrap yourself in the Talis and the amount of time it takes to walk dalad six feet which is still only a few seconds but in that moment you're getting the biggest hug from Hashem who doesn't need to start their day with a hug from Hashem a hug from Hashem so whatever hug wink kiss whatever it is we're looking for it's coming from it's coming from Hashem okay bear with me for this one we're gonna get to the learning I'm trying to weave in the DOR a little bit here now I'm paranoid that we're not learning enough okay de go my name is such and such for context I'm from New York a few weeks ago I was in bokeh thank you for the that you would just call blah blah blah so I guess I'll just save you the time and not make you read the thank you part thank you I flew back from shok the next morning Sunday to make it back for shear and Landers where I'm a student just to land and find out Shear was canceled that day because one of the students unfortunately had passed away after arriving home my parents told me they would rushed to the hospital where my grandmother was in bad condition she ended up passing away a few hours later following days were a whirlwind as my father and a tried to find plane tickets to Israel my grandfather brought peral plots many years ago they were living in Israel this is when I want to share two stories that were clearly guided from my father found a one-way ticket to Israel to bury my grandmother Tuesday but had no return flight after the levia he took a taxi straight back from the airport in order to make it to S Shiva with the rest of the family and the rest with my grandfather and the rest of the family in New York on his way to the airport he was told he was still frantically searching for a plane ticket he called the travel agent who told him there will be 40 La Platinum Plus and platinum members waiting on standby you have no status there's zero chance you're getting on the flight to JFK or New York or anywhere for that matter my father told me that for some reason and this is not like him he had a calm feeling that it would work out that hasem would not let him miss it and Sh with the rest of the family and sure enough after arriving at the airport no ticket my uncle called him from America that a guy in Brooklyn had managed to book him on the next flight straight to JFK no strings attached it's always a guy in Brooklyn you need everybody needs a guy in Brooklyn you need a few guys in Brooklyn in case the first guy in Brooklyn's not available you need a few guys in Brooklyn as my father sat down on his plane seat at 12:30 a.m. in Israel we had finished offing Mar at my grandfather's house my sister was coming from the city and needed to be picked up from the train station after a short argument of who was going to go pick her up I decided I would go I got in the car as I was driving down the main street of our town right past the Dunkin Donuts on one side and a large Shool on the other an outof control driver many witnesses seemed to say he had substance or blatantly drunk swerved onto the wrong side of the street and smashed into my car right into the driver's side headlight area going 40 m an hour my car flew from the left lane ended up 3 feet from the curb all the airbags deployed and I knew my car was completely total right away there's the car there's the car there's the car the car we got visuals the car was totaled right away the first thought I had all the airbags deployed car thrown in the air head on collision the first thought I had I told myself this is clearly from Hashem and it's where I need to be as the re always says the Jew is never stuck it's time to step up and put my amuna to the test and see how calm I could stay during this I looked to my right and saw two friends of mine right there on the sidewalk within a minute hadal and the police were on the scene it was 5:30 p.m. it was rush hour and there were dozens of my friends who left the base Med across the street to see what happened people from the community in the street saw the whole thing pull over shortly within 15 minutes tillum chats were opening prayer were opening praying for me but no one knew yet I actually walked away from the accident without a scratch my mother and I received dozens of texts asking when I would be coming out of the coma and how many bones did I break this was a miracle from Hashem I didn't know why he decided to make me crash and why I decided I would walk away from this accident not even a single injury not even sore I got home from the hospital at 2 am and I was in the Shiva house at 7 AM for Minion but I know he orchestrated all this and wanted it to happen because of my amuna preparation I was able to stay calm and collect throughout the entire time so much that even when the guy that hit me came over to apologize I told him God made me God made you hit me dude it's all good God wanted us to happen that's all that matters needless to say the police officers on aell members who were heard this were in complete shock and I was too I don't know where the kak came from but Hashem put in my hands the chance to be madesh his name at that moment and in the upcoming days during the Shiva when people would visit and see me and say aren't you the guy who total his car how are you completely fine I would smile and just sayem I'm not saying I'm all I'm perfect at all I struggle every day to stay calm believe in Hashem but the little things but in those hours I lived more with Hashem than ever in my life anyway if you don't think it's worthwhile to work on living with amuna in those moments oh there were so many more I wanted to read but we got to learn okay just one more K connects the last week and then we'll get to we'll get to keep sending them please send them they mean the world to me and to others one more quick one back to the text few weeks ago I was waiting for an Uber in New Jersey remember my Uber story from American Dream wall I was waiting in Uber in New Jersey when it came when it kept getting canceled I really needed to get somewhere and after three cancellations one finally came and I got in the car when I told him I'm going to New York the driver says no I don't drive there get out welcome to the tri-state area at that point I'm from there it's okay I'm allowed to say it save save those emails at that point it was getting it was cutting a close and I was getting pretty frustrated I kept telling myself a Jew was never stuck I'm right where I'm supposed to be but I was still in a rush after a few minutes Uber picks up this time a black Escalade pulls up when I get in the car the driver an elderly guy looks at me through his mirror and says we went on to talk in Hebrew the rest of the ride about his time in the IDF although he isn't so connected to religion he feels so much love from kabad inspires him to always keep a yamak in his pocket I now know that every Uber cancellation ends like this sorry I know not every Uber cancellation story ends like this and I was only debating sending the story in then the most recent Shear was labeled when your Uber cancels I knew I had to send this nothing is chance and I wanted it this way I was going to get there thank you for what you do thank you Hashem okay there are many more they're fantastic we'll get to them we've been learning from Nar the North of Israel he and everyone should be safe there and we last left off with a very radical idea it's not his comes that stems from the holy bmov the says the following tells us that Wicked are filled with regret regrets a very positive attribute regrets a positive quality you regret mistakes regret indiscretions regret poor judgment regret what we did wrong regret is what stimulates it's the Catalyst that what motivates change and growth regrets good regrets good so what do you mean Wicked are filled with regret if they're filled with regret clearly they're not so wicked to which the B answers that one we need to know it's not talking about religious activity although everything is religious activity it means I regret I missed ding I regret I didn't say AB I regret I spoke lashara that's healthy regret that's healthy regret says the B what the our rabbis were saying us is in why didn't I make that turn why didn't I stay a few minutes later why didn't I invest in that stock in that property buy that apartment all of our decisions and all of our actions wise or foolish prudent or imprudent they all come from hem know Hashem is the one who put that crazy idea Hashem made us either do something natural or unnatural Hashem made us do something that makes sense or for whatever reason in that moment do something that makes no sense as the gives us the so we look back Jackie is a whole routine about how every Jew was a building in Manhattan they could have owned you know that whole routine and it's true you could have regret I was invited do you know I had Apple stock but I sold it at whenever I got early in it could have been early in on Tesla do you know that apartment you know that building do you know how many logos when I moved here in 1999 what a logo went for I could have bought 10 logos for the price of one that what they' be worth and you're living in your sitting with regret why did I sell too soon why didn't I hold that why did I hold too long why did I say no to that person why did I say yes to this one we beat ourselves up and we knock ourselves down and we live with regret and like L's wife we turn into a pillar of salt paralyzed and preserved and stuck stuck in the past says the that's what the rabis meant it's wickedness to live with such regret draw a line in the card V go forward vit I told you my son he loves to say not just when we're learning viter as soon as the light turns green aba vter Drive vter vter in life don't live with regret I don't know if there's any golfers here but one of the great things about golf it's 18 holes but you know on the scorecard each hole is in a little box and you know when it's in a little box it means you could draw golfers know this you draw a line on the card why do you draw a line on the card because you start again so you blew up on a hole you got a triple bogey hit in the woods you hit it in the water you had a bad string of holes golfers know you draw a line on the card let's go next nine let's see how we do on the next hole can't change the last hole I can't change the last hole what am I going to do on the next hole one of the greatest statistics in golf you didn't know you were coming today for some gol one of the great statistics in golf for pro golfers is they're bounce back from bogey ratio what happens if you get a bogey on the next hole bad golfers amateur guy bad bogy is a bad score you hit the ball in the water in the sand it took you par is how many it should take to get in the hole a Bogi is above that a birdie is below that so what happens you had a bed hole you had a blowup hole get the ball in the water you got a bogey what happens on the next hole the worst golfers in professional sports get another bogey they get a par the best golfers think tiger might have had the best birdie after a bogey ratio do you bounce back what happens on the next hole and that's true for us you had a meeting you had a gathering you had a Yanti you had a shabas meal you cooked a recipe you had an investment opportunity you blew up you had a bogey in life you blew up was a CH your kid left t in the middle of the floor your spouse didn't react the way you wanted and you blew up or you live with you beat yourself up you the next tole draw a line on the card next hole the next ho of Life the next investment opportunity the next work those are the other we should give them away again the notebooks Turn the Page we made notebooks living with turn the P I wake up every day is a new day we turn the page we start again I can't change the past I can only control the present and plan for the future and rash to live stuck in the past to think about oh but that chip that bad pot that bogey literally or figuratively in life to get stuck and to be paralyzed will simply compromise and sabotage your present don't give up the present because you're stuck in the past that's a thought of wickedness that's thinking of wickedness gives us so what happens he made a bad investment or you missed out on a good investment you sold too soon you held on too long you know who put that thought in your head Hashem did that doesn't mean you can't say how could I learn from it what could I do better next time how can I grow from it of course those are all thoughts that we have and things that we say so on the one hand simultaneously we say what can I learn how can I grow how can I do better but I don't have any regret I don't have any regret we can all look back at our lives what school we went to so some of the things we did in those schools some of the friends we hung out with some of the things we did with those friends I look back at my life and my journey and I didn't do especially if my wife listen I didn't do anything too crazy outrageous outlandish I was a good boy I was always a good I was always a good kid I was always a good kid but you look back and there even for the good kid there are those things but I don't have regret it was all part of the path that contributed to who I am now and how do I know that I'd be who I am now or I'd be on the road to who I still want to be if I didn't go through and live and experience and that was that's where I was placed that was among whom I was placed that was the environment and all of us in life K orchestrated he curated he choreographed specifically for each of us we have our own playlist he doesn't just have a generic one he gives us all we each have a playlist of our life and Hashem is the one who makes the playlist for you makes a playlist you know what that means you know what that means I won't take advantage because she's not here and tell you the story I'm just going to tell you this story that and I went out and then we broke up for a short time which is a much nicer way of saying that she dumped me and then we got back together I'll leave out the details I'll leave out the details to protect the innocent so we got back together maybe you remember I don't know if anyone here's old enough to remember there was such a thing as tapes cassette tapes and do you remember that people would dub tapes you'd buy the with the two tapes and you put the blank one in and You' you you'd have different albums and then you take a song from this album you know the the the Mish took you know the effort it took to play the tape to find the song that you wanted to find stop it right at the place where you're GNA play it to put it on to the next tape and then press record Play and play at the exact same time and start it at the right moment to get the song and stop it at the right moment to get the to stop it at the right time and then bring out the next tape or turn on the other side or get it to the next song and you'd make a mix tape right a mixtape everyone remember the mixtapes so when we got back together and I was going we were getting back together she wanted to get back together I decide I was going to for for a week and she met me at the airport she had made cookies and she made me a mixtape to listen to what an act what a gesture of affection a mixtape a mixtape just for you I thought of these songs you're going to Israel You're gonna be here this song in this order on this tape took this many hours wow wow what a moment K makes a mixtape for everyone called our lives this is your playlist these are the people you're surrounded to this is what you're listening this is where you are this is with you live this is your job this and Hashem makes this mixtape for each and every one of us it's your mix now it happens to me today we don't make mixtapes anymore now what do you do in three seconds you make a playlist and then what do you have I have my slow play miss my fast playlist my Arab shabas playlist my Israel playlist my wartime playlist my peace time playlist We Make playlists because they take three seconds and it's great and it's easy and it's wonderful and there's also a very big negative and downside to it because it used to be that when you listen to a tape you have to suffer through the songs you don't like also because to forward it to find where to stop you have to listen when you bought a new album I won't say a name because I don't want to suggest they had songs that aren't great you brought a new album from this new music Superstar so I don't know on that tape there were eight 10 songs two of them were fantastic three of them were pretty good the rest you weren't really you have to listen to them all to hear the songs you like because that's the way it was now what do you do forward forward forward delete I don't like that song I don't want that song I'm Not list and you know what happens because of that we're living in a world where we think that the people opposite us they're they're our playlist so your parent or your spouse is saying something you don't want it you say forward delete that's not on my playlist I don't want to hear this feedback about my book report or the feedback about where I leave my socks or the feedback about what time I got home from work so it's not all positive the technology breakthrough has added a lot of ease and comfort but it's overlapped into other areas of our life which aren't so positive okay back to our regular schedule program from from playlist makes the playlist of our life we are we are where we're meant to be with whom the people we're meant to be with in that circumstance and if we went longer went short or held on too long or sold too early or invested or didn't invest is the one he's the one he's the one go so far as to say something strong and bold and he says if you live with regret if you get stuck you're a kofer you're denying God's role in your life it's an act of you don't have amuna you don't have amuna teresy the person who lives with amuna says this was part of his plan that that's why I took out that meal or that's what I ordered from the menu or that's why I you beat yourself up I shouldn't have ordered that I remember from last time I don't like that why did I order that I should have tried the new thing why didn't I then three more days you're still thinking about where you went to the restaurant how much you paid it wasn't the best thing you should have that's a lack of amuna that's a lack of amuna what you could say is remind me next time to order the other I want to learn from it no one suggesting that we blindly go through life and we don't learn from our experiences of the past but we don't get stuck we don't perseverate we're not paralyzed we're not preserved marinated in that salt that's holding us back koru is the one in our head whatever reason he had you choose that whatever reason you went there whatever reason you said that it all comes from the comes from the it all comes from theom so what do we do with one of the letters I got this week one of our wonderful members of our community one of oura listeners heard this year last week andto and asks the following good afternoon this question has been bothering me for some time as we continue to work on accepting everything that happens is due to God's determining for us if that is so if that is so then is Just an Illusion on our part do we have free will do we not have free will if that's where God wanted us to be if that's the thought the idea he planted in our head go to that restaurant order this from the menu invest in that sell now hold it longer even though it's going to go down buy that don't buy that is it our free will or is it predetermined from God and from above I used to try to explain to myself that P was like driving a car with GPS we're holding the steering wheel but God is navigating the journey but now if what we have learned that even our wrong turns are hashem's will then where is our choice other than how we react in life's visites thank you in advance for addressing this I was hoping to not get that email because it's a tough question it's a very tough question it's a beautiful way to live and it's the way we're meant to live according to the bashem and many others that Hashem is the one putting these ideas in our head making us live in that way but where does our free will come in footnote go to the bottom the so the way that he resolves the way that he deals with this is to say that when and where do we have free will when it comes to spiritual religious choices am I gonna D am I gonna make a will I gossip will I do the Mitzvah will I neglect the Mitzvah will I be righteous will I be not righteous that's where we have free will but which restaurant make the turn invest in the house what we call mundane matters not religious matters that Hashem is the one putting the ideas in our head that is all coming that's how he resolves it I I struggle with that for the following reason the balat says like it too there's a question are there really any mundane matters if a person is living a really religious life a life of amuna there is no mundane matter every choice every Behavior every action every thought is infused with an invitation and opportunity to connect Hashem to pursue our mission of why we're here to elevate it with religious meaning or not or not there is no in between there's no par and and I happen to highly suggest against in the kitchen because I think it's hard to maintain the hardest questions and Cas I get are my power of knife and the milk dishwasher my power of spoon my power of pot the thing I try to keep par of it's very hard to keep I'm if you have parv God bless you more power to you it's very hard to keep par of but in the kitchen you could have par of at least in theory but in life there is no par it's either KES or it's it's holy or it's not holy or it's not holy and we're meant to we're we're instructed to we're charged with transforming and elevating everything so even eating even eating there's a religious component to eating before AA after the mindfulness in the eating how much what when where with whom eating is we've studied a little bit we have a whole sheer on YouTube on eating the Jewish value of eating not the Jewish way of eating it's its own sheer but the Jewish religious experience that should come from eating a person can't live without eating has a lot on this you need to eat to live you need to eat to live which means that every time you're eating you're connecting to the source of life and if you approach every morsel of food you put in your mouth as this morsel of food Hashem is contact and connection with the Divine because it is giving me life it's giving me life you know the joy that you have when your cell phone is down to the like 2% you're barely holding on you don't know what what you're going to do and you get near an outlet with a cord someone's got a power pack and they're going to let you plug in and when you plug it in you come back it's you come back to life right you got you got connected to the source of power it was about to die and you recharged and reconnected to the source of power every time we eat says without eating we can't live that's why we get hangry without eating we can't live emotionally spiritually certainly physically every morsel of food that we take in we are connecting to the source of life to the Divine we're plugging in and if you would eat it and chew it and think about it I'm chewing hasem I'm swallowing Hashem I've just recharged and rejuvenated and I was just born again I've made contact with the source of Life Hashem eating is totally different sleeping he has a whole peric about sleeping the notion the Jewish notion and turn Friday into Arab shabas we spent a few weeks talking about sleeping why shabas is the idea of sh and shabas but chabas the value of sleeping on chabas a SCH a nap I'm very mockit on this person has to take a good SCH winter months it's tough but to sleep on chabas so there is no mundane there is no mundane eating sleeping driving it's all religious it's all it's all a platform and a stage to grow and to experience religion so then which is it free will or predetermination right don't have regret wasn't you Hashem put that idea in your head Hashem LED you down that road to that restaurant order off that menu invest in that property it was Hashem not you so don't regret what's next figure out what's next so where is free will come in so maybe we'll talk about this more next time but I'll give you a hint beginning of a hint my dear friend I spoke about this with there's a difference between Y and knowledge and choice Hashem has knowledge of what we're going to do but that doesn't take away our choice from doing it now we don't understand that because in our experience and in our world they're integrated that knowledge and that choice come together we can't have a knowledge of what someone's going to do and they still have the freedom to choose to do it or not do it if we know they'll do it it means that their freedom has been suspended it means that there's a computer that was programmed there's a robot that was automated we can predict with certainty will happen because there is no option for it not to right that's our experience they in mesed they're integrated they're intertwined they go together but from hashem's perspective Hashem Hashem lives outside of time there is no what we will do what we did do what we are doing there is no time so the whole question only comes up because we're Bound by time and we don't relate to the experience of being outside of time but Hashem who operates and lives outside of time can have a knowledge and we yet still maintain the freedom of which to do of what to do but what's the value of that freedom if he's the one directing it if we took that wrong turn but he's the one who put into our head to be distracted to not pay attention to miss the turn then did we miss the turn or did he have us miss the turn that's still a huge question and it's the one we're going to pick up with the mm next week wishing everyone wish you good news from and around the world please remain to complete all of safer tillum in just a few minutes