Living With Emunah (Part 271) - Giving Him Our Hearts

yeah good morning poker so welcome back to living with emuna a good air of yantiff so glad that we are spending our final count up to shavu as tarsinai our final steps in uh ending up at the mountain together uh preparing by living with emuna I want to thank our generous sponsors the series uh is generously sponsored by Dr Xavi and Bella Morgan in memory Dr Brian galbot in memory of Bella's mother Dr Ellen shanzer Morgan's have just signed up to sponsor next year as well so I want to express our endless and boundless gratitude to the Morgans for their incredible generosity and thank them for sponsoring the show this morning she is also co-sponsored by Susan and Charles Rajasthan and loving memory of Anna Khan Susan's beloved mother on her first year outside a very special woman woman of profound demuna and faith and we miss her and wish a lot of comfort also I want to thank last week we mentioned we were running low on our incredible caffeinate with cavana and municups and we have an anonymous sponsor thank you so so much for the generosity we deeply deeply appreciate it okay we're going to start off as we always do with some great emails from you then we'll dive back into the text together and get ready for the holiday of shibuous and stand at the base of that mountain and receive that Torah from a place of profound emuna and Faith together so so um keep the emails coming I love them they inspire me they motivate me they're heartwarming to me they take pressure off of me having to prepare a class and um and they also again they model for all of us manifesting and executing on a moon and not only in in concept and academically but in practice so here we go kapalamuna a lot of the amuna stories and emails have to do with the the Divine Providence of clicking on the episode to hear exactly what you needed to hear when you were going through something there's nothing random there's nothing chance there are no accidents you click on something and you heard it exactly when you when you needed to hear it so here's one like that dear by Goldberg I do not really listen to your podcasts that was very good for me appreciate yeah two thumbs up for honesty that was good good for humility we just finished today is all about humility how to practice genuine authentic humility so I want to thank this author for helping me helping me there I don't really listen to your podcast let's just make that clear my wife however listens regularly so when we were driving back from apartment challenge why I suggested we listened to behind the interview with Deb Ornstein I agreed that was last week your mushline episode Zeb Ornstein from ear David the interview was great inspiring but I had really been waiting patiently to share my Reflections in the apartment so during the journey basically guys like I want to talk to my wife she just wanted to listen to you let's be clear I never listened to you but like most men I had no choice and I had to listen to you when I thought the episode had ended I paused the podcast and showed the following reflection I must explain I'm not a warm and fuzzy individual that was pretty clear yeah the more cold abstract and Technical the sugar the more inspiring it is for me in any case the mother of the bar mitzvah lives in America had shared that they visited the Kota she told the boy to ask Hashem for anything you wished that took me back to when I was six years old and visited the kotel and diligently wrote my request and as instructed and put it in the Koto I had asked Hashem for my pet dog that had died to come back to life futile as I matured I thought so too however now many years later I reflected I was about 10 years later that I got another pet dog I won't bore you with the details that were meaningful for me but looking back it has become clear that my prayers were indeed answered yes it was a long drive so he was reflecting the comment about going to the hotel reminded him this first time he went to the hotel and he asked Hashem to bring his dog back and then later he got a new dog and he felt at least warm and fuzzy for the dog if not for me I had shared I had shared it was over then I pressed play and here are the next few words you said quote Rabbi Brody I sent you an article today that I saw half of America can say their soulmate is their pet in truth in truth I have no idea what you were thinking when you shared that in truth it probably should have been edited out of the podcast again thank you for your honesty for us in the car for us in the car it was like Hashem saying yes you got it indeed the actions of the Jewish people are all interconnected even the most insane ways inane ways to show Hashem cares about even the most minor things that affect you thank you and cultist I'm only joking I do appreciate his email and he is warm and fuzzy despite his insistence that he's not and it was kind of him to write but again I love these emails because he's basically sharing this non-warm and fuzzy warm and fuzzy memory with his wife in the car about his dog and being six years old and for some reason and he's right I have no idea why I brought that up with her by Brody about this article I saw about people feeling closer to their pets than to their spouse right when he pressed play I needed to hear that and that memory and that was great here's another one maybe a little bit more Rabbi Goldberg first I want to begin my email with what you famously read as blah blah blah I want to thank you for the amunisher blah blah blah blah on that note this story just a place I said to myself how can I not share with my Goldberg I work about 30 minutes from my house give or take with traffic I prefer to Leave Myself 45 minutes to get home so that I'm sure I'm on time for my seven-year-old's boss otherwise no one is home to greet her on days that I don't get on time I panic and rush and I'm anxiety the entire way home thinking I'm not going to make it in time she'll be very nervous when she sees I'm not there today was one of those days I left with little time to spare I got into my car rushing and panicking and willing all the people on the road to get out of the way I started today's amunisher on my way into work so when I turned on my car it automatically continued the rub was up to the part about this was last week's year she did see Hashem on the steering wheel remember I told you about my friend picked me up at the airport last week and he has taped on his steering wheel actually Madi you are with me from paragraph demo Psalm 23 Hashem no matter where I go no matter what I'm doing whatever's happening in my life you are with me so I mentioned last week's sheer how I got into his car and I saw to a steering wheel and we should tape that on our steering wheel on our refrigerator and our our mirror of our bathroom that all the places that we panic and get anxious and worry Hashem you are with me so this author writes the rub was up to the part about it being on the steering wheel now if that wasn't a message meant directly for me I don't know what was I was already panicking that I would miss the bus but I heard that story and I said you know what Hashem knows I got to be home if it's his will I will get there on time I had the most calm ride home and yes as I pulled into my driveway my daughter's bus was pulling up thank you again feel free to share anonymously so another two examples today last week we talked about three unlikely sources of Musser and amuna remember what they were the terrorists with the missiles that Hashem redirects and the JetBlue flight attendant who said the main thing the plane is working and what was the third one oh the non-religious waiter in the restaurant in Israel our bosses is above so that was last week's theme this team the week's theme of these emails are turning on the amunisher and nothing to do with me I just speak I often don't even know what I'm going to say and Hashem helps people press play when it's something that they need to hear and there are no coincidences and nothing is chance and whatever we choose to listen to and whatever we press play and whatever we're exposed to whatever we see is exactly what we're meant to perceive the mission Imperials it says know what is above you iron those and the ear hears and all of your actions all your Deeds are recorded and the safer in the book so classically the mission means to tell us that be careful what you do because everywhere you go and everything you do is being recorded now for many generations I'm sure Jews learned this Mission and said yeah not everything can't see everything doesn't hear everything doesn't know everything but now we know that there's Google cameras everywhere and there's yesterday I was talking about we have an air conditioning we need to replace and then I go on my computer and all of a sudden I see ads for air conditioners because this they're always listening on your phone on your computer you're being listened to all the time and you're being watched all the time wherever you go whatever you do in this room right now on this campus and Google Earth all over the universe there are cameras so our generation appreciates this Mission and maybe more than any that came before that Hashem has cameras and microphones everywhere and you never escape and you're never alone and you're never innocent you're never immune he's listening he's watching and if you wouldn't do it in front of him don't do it you wouldn't say it in front of them don't say it because he's there and he's watching all the time and that's in fact what many say what the process of our transition into the next world is there is no Heaven and Hell in the imagery of our youth like little angels with wings and then like the little devil with the pitch fork and that's not what it looks like fiery heaven and hell are Hashem sits you down and he presses play and says let's watch your life together every part of it including when you thought you were alone when you thought no one was listening let's watch now we have the gift of editing editing is called chuva chuva is Hashem says I'm giving you access to the tape there's only one carpet and if you like you can edit out the parts that you don't want to sit and watch with me that you don't want to sit and listen to with me but there's an exercise to edit you have to go through the process of true but it has to be genuine and you can edit it out and then wouldn't it be amazing if by the end of our Lives when we come upstairs Hashem says I'm going to press play and you say fantastic where's the popcorn so excited I have no shame I have no embarrassment I have no hesitation in any part of this video Let's watch the whole thing as opposed to my bar mitzvah video which I would never want anyone to see any part of I'm saying what I look like and sounded like and all of us I'm joking but wouldn't it be amazing to have a video of our life that we were so proud to play in Times Square with no hesitation as opposed to the video as it stands now where you would be mortified at the thought that others including the source of the universe would watch every part of it and that's part of the inspiration duchova grab the editing equipment do chuva and decide what you want to edit out what you want to repair but that's the classic way the mission is understood know that there's a a eye in the sky God Is Watching God is listening it's all being recorded Choose Wisely choose carefully the holy bashem he understood this Mission differently and he said know that above you is God know that you don't live and operate in this world independently and in isolation know that there is God above he's pulling the strings he's choreographed he's curating your entire life so I in a row at what you see you were meant to see those in shamas and what you hear you were meant to hear and how you react and how you respond and what you do as a result it's all being recorded So if you overheard someone say I'm going through a hard time I didn't hear that I don't want to get involved I don't want to help I don't want to know if you heard you were meant to hear if you saw you were meant to see now what are you going to do with it what are you going to do with it and the same is true for simple things like these two emails if you pressed play and you were up to this in the podcast there was a reason you were meant to hear that you were meant to watch that you were meant to see that and now what do I do with that it's the difference between living mindfully or mindlessly thoughtfully or thoughtlessly are you living your life saying I'm processing everything I see in here and I'm constantly trying to understand why I meant to see and hear it and how it's meant to improve me and make me better what I meant to do with it how I meant to react to it or you blindlessly just letting motion carry us through life that's the difference that's what these emails are telling us I'll read one more quickly and then we'll get back into the into the safer I want to thank you very much weekly I'm going to share blah blah blah listen every week blah blah like when you read the emails that you get and this happened to me I thought right away I must email you it's not a major story something I would have reacted to very differently had an up and listening I just graduated nursing school last week Mazel Tov and our professors told us as soon as we get an email out with our authorization to test we can then sign up to take the NCLEX which is the board exam that certifies you to be a nurse I'm in a from nursing program we have a group chat very active we were all very anxious to receive our authorization to test so we can move along the process and take the final exam to become a nurse accepting a girl excited the road on the chat she received her ATT authorization to test several girls responded they also did it I checked my email I didn't see any email from the Board of Nursing I panicked I checked every one of my email accounts that exist no email in any of my inboxes I had water next to me and I started to say the bracha and I thought charcoal caffeinated everything is in hashem's hands I replayed the words from your podcast in my head things only happen if he wills it I thought about it for a minute and I became much calmer I thought to myself this is in hashem's hands and I won't Panic bar Hashem two hours later I got the email so again these these emails which there are many more I could share but they're really all trying to reinforce the same idea which is really all I do every Wednesday morning at 8 45 and yet for some reason you still show up would you say the same thing every week which is you could live a life where you're anxious and worried and panicking and frustrated and angry and envious and arrogant and or you could live a life where you say you know what I didn't get the email yet we'll see what's meant to be I'm just a passenger on this ride called life let's see the next step in this adventure you could live a life where you press play and I needed to hear that or this thing needed to happen or I'm calmer because stoicos you could be driving home and you're scrambling and I hope that my daughter won't be waiting for me in the driveway or you could say you know what I won't make me get there any faster that won't make me fly through the air that won't make the lights all turn green so you know what I say whatever it is meant to be is will be and I'm calm and I'm Serene and I'm happy and I'm joyful and my blood blood pressure is low and I'm healthy it's up to us do we want to put on our moon glasses or get our emuna lasek and see the world through the lens of amuna see Hashem everywhere in our life feel his presence talk to him hear him talking to us then look at the life that it gives look at each of these emails that say because I'm working on this because I work out my immuno muscles because I'm creating a Muna muscle memory in which I react to these circumstances by staying calm my life is better that's what all these emails essentially say so do we want to be able to write an email literally or figuratively do we want to get to that point to write that email it's all up to us you don't have to wait for someone else it's all up to us what response will we have we can't always change our circumstance we can't change our surroundings we can't change the people around us but we can change how we react and we can be responsible for how it makes us feel and we can own how we respond and will we respond with that sense of emuna with that attitude of emuna and to a degree that's what this yante of Shiva is really all about we do not commemorate things in the past it's not our religion other religions holidays are all about for example in America not only religions in America Memorial Day Independence Day July 4th each of these days they they commemorate something in history July 4th Independence Day the day that we became independent I feel bad because we're interviewing a bit nervous tonight but the day that we became independent the chief Rabbi of England okay but July 4th the day that we became that we became independent so how do you commemorate it I don't know anyone in my entire life who sits down on July 4th and says let's reflect on Independence what is independence what does it mean to be independent let's work on our sense of Independence let's evaluate and grow how independent we are let's Express gratitude for Independence you know all I've ever heard anyone observe July 4th where's the barbecue what's on sale what time are the fireworks because a secular notion of of time is linear and we're moving forward on that line and therefore events holidays are just commemorating the past and we commemorate them superficially we commemorate them in no way connected to the theme of the energy of the holiday but the Jewish notion of time is very different Jewish notion of time is not a circle if it were a circle you'd meet yourself from last year or two years ago and three years ago Jewish nursing of time is a spiral spiral repeats the same cycle but it does so moving forward it's a spiral and we're repeating the same cycle and as we repeat that cycle we encounter dates on that calendar that have meaning and themes and energy and the historical events that happen on them we commemorate them not as part of a past but the historical event revealed the energy and theme that is present that we can tap into in the present we're not commemorating that the Torah was given what are we doing we're back at the mountain we're re-accepting it we're accepting it Anew it's for some accepting it for the very first time we're not commemorating you commemorate with a sale but rather we are re-experiencing we are we're not reenacting you know that's like the um was that fair I went to as a kid the renaissance fair right we're not riding a horse and a knight and jousting and we're not it's not a Renaissance Fair Shiva us we're not reenacting oh let's put flowers all over the shul and let's reenact and let's pretend who gets to be Moshe who's Aaron who's who are who's the mountain who are the people let's reenact we're not reenacting it's not the Shibu is fair we are actually experiencing we are engaging we are accepting the Torah anew this notion of time which we don't have time to develop entirely right now is not only true for the the universal dates on our calendar that we all observe it's also true for the individual and personal dates our birthday is not a day that we commemorate 48 years ago I was born on this day let's celebrate it 48 years later how whatever random way what a birthday is is wow on this date those many years ago Hashem decided the world needed me and I'm going to experience this day with a sense of mission and purpose and reevaluate why am I here and what difference do I make and gratitude that he created me I'm going to be born again each birthday and evaluate Mark Twain's famous comment two most important days in a person's life are the day you're born and the day you find out why so every birthday is re-asking the why the anniversary is not just a random date let's go out for dinner let's exchange gifts let's figure out how to write yet another card because it's an anniversary every anniversary you are getting married again you are recommitting you're offering vows new you are evaluating the state of your marriage and you're committing to that marriage Again by the way these dates are meaningful not the Gregorian secular dates those don't mean anything to us as Jews the dates that we follow are the Hebrew dates you should know your Hebrew birthday you should know your Hebrew anniversary you should know the Hebrew date of shavuas and sukis that's the calendar we live by and we've lived by and that's the calendar that gives us life it sustained us it's enabled our survival we are a people of the Moon not of the Sun that is our calendar that's ours and we should know it know your Hebrew birthday know your Hebrew anniversary and know that on that day Hashem decided the world needed you your birthday no on that day you went from being a half to becoming a whole your Hebrew anniversary and don't just commemorate it superficially and randomly the tap into the energy of it what did it mean to go from being a half to a whole how do you complement each other or bring out the best in each other what does it mean who is your unit what is your family what is your family mission statement what is an anniversary that's what these days really mean so shavuas is not commemorated it's a mistake it's a terrible mistake this notion of time that people think that we two have a linear we're moving forward so we're just celebrating something all the way from the past no we're in a spiral we're revisiting these same dates on a date it's not the event that matters it's what the historical event revealed that we to experience on that same day so pesach's not about commemorating leaving Egypt pesach is about oh we left Egypt so today is about Freedom what does freedom mean to me in TAF Shin pegimo in 2023 what is emancipation what is Liberty what is freedom and sukis what does it mean to have faith and to know God is protecting me even when I'm exposed to the elements what does it mean chanukkah to see everything as a miracle and nothing is natural what does it mean Purim to read Hashem into the megillah of my life even when his name doesn't appear these historical events are not why we're commemorating it these historical events gave us the code to decode what is the theme that is embedded in that day and time that we can tap into as well so shavors I'm not commemorating the past should what are we doing we're going to stand to the mountain Friday morning and to make sure we're not late many of us stay up all night Thursday night because the original time we overslept we don't want to oversleep again so we stay up all night to ensure that we're up for for sure Lewis which is also why we eat cheesecake because it will so upset our stomach that we'll be up all night and on time for our Sinai at least ashkenazim can still sleep in but ashkenazma to eat cheesecake will be up all night so we won't be late and Friday morning my friends don't sleep late and don't stay in bed and don't sit it out and don't stay home and don't say you know I gotta go on Shabbos because that's he is current I've gotta say he is so I'll take off Friday you want to be missing from from the mountain all the Jewish people are going to be standing at the mountain arm and arm hand in hand everyone together Unified I Promise You by Motors will go back to bickering and fighting and calling each other's names and marginalizing and dismissing but for a little bit we're going to stand there together a little bit we're going to hold each other's hands and our heart is going to have one beat it's going to beat with one rhythm there will be no differences there will be nothing that divides us whatever your opinion on judicial reform whoever you want to vote for in the next presidential election whatever you think about gun control or whether you're rooting for the heat whatever you think whatever yamaka you wear don't wear we'll all be there together you want to be missing we're not just well if it's a commemoration you could miss it it's a commemoration I can miss the Renaissance Fair I'll sit it out it's okay been there done that renaissance fair I don't have to see that again if that's where all it was sleep in but it's not we're getting together to go to the mountain again we're going to stand there with our children and and that the the balcore is going to read the acerosa de Bros the Ten Commandments and the two the first two are coming from God the next eight are Moshe and the balcora is going to play that role and we are going to again we're not commemorating we're not reenacting we are accepting the Torah we're accepting that relationship with Hashem don't miss it don't sit it out don't be a spectator show up be there be ready be excited be excited so mentioned this the other night beautiful katskareba says that she was you know the mountain describes where did we stand underneath the mountain we stood underneath the mountain why the gemara understands that God lifted the mountain and held it over a head and said if you accept my Torah mutaval the great fantastic but if not you're surely going to die that is some proposal imagine date the boy says to the girl goes down on one knee and says will you marry me if you say yes everything will be great if not you will surely die if not you will wither away you will grow old and lonely you will rule the day you will regret this moment and you will surely die very very romantic God held the mountain over our head we stood underneath that mountain and that's the medrish that we all know and we were all taught we grew up with like a Barrel upside down over us he threatened to drop it on our head we accepted the Torah out of coercion how do you reconcile that with NASA venishma I thought we said we will do and we will listen Saudi that's all but there's another image the tajbats God held the mountain over our head because it was a Hupa and we stood under it as a loving bride and groom and in fact the measures tells us that the mountain was was translucent it was clear you could see the sky just like today we have the custom of a bride and groom getting married Outdoors or in New York at least the wedding halls have a skylight right over where The Choppa goes so that you can see the sky it's in fulfillment of the blessing that Hashem said to Abram go outside and look up and count the Stars that's how many your progeny your children will be and we wish and hope and pray for that young couple that they have many children and so we get married under a clear sky a first marriage at least so the got this girl go ahead you got it come on come on I know don't worry about it no no forget it you gotta pull you gotta turn it's a whole it's a whole forget it forget it a for effort a forever so uh Hashem held the mountain over our head not to drop it on our head not to coerce us not to threaten us the all the mountain over our head it was and in fact the one of the time the students of the marami runenberg says all the Customs we have at a wedding all derive from harcina this was a wedding this was a union this was a bond this is a romantic betrothal between God and the Jewish people and what do we say the groom says to the bride here Israel behold you are betrothed to me with this ring according to the laws of Moshe and the Jewish people and the Great Cuts goretta points out imagine the groom said to the brother you are betrothed with this ring according to the laws would they be married he left off one word made up of two little letters what word to me if you omits that word they're not married you could have the greatest smorg carving stations charcuterie boards stuffed cabbage Sushi Galore you could have a 400 piece Orchestra and six of the most famous singers that exist you could have flowers I don't even know what words to use to describe your flowers and excited you could have incredible flowers you can have incredible flowers but if you omit those two letters leave that word and all you say you don't omit the word Lee says the cutska you're not married why what's so important about the word Lee all right ah behold you on the Kardashians betrothed Lee to me because if you just say behold you are betrothed you betrothed to everyone else standing here you betrothed to the whole rest of the world but that's not marriage marriage is Lee me I'm invested I'm involved I give of myself I make myself vulnerable and prepared to sacrifice selflessly for this relationship there has to be a sense of Lee and the cutscore applied this not only to the marriage between people basavadam human beings but our marriage with hashema didn't for that's what Mata that's what it means to be back at the mountain and re-accepting the Torah means Lee am I involved so many of us are going through the motions of Yiddish kite come to kosher we keep Shabbos we spend gazillions of dollars to send our kids for a Jewish Education but are we really invested in a relationship with Hashem do we talk to them do we listen to him do we make time for him just yesterday I was meeting with somebody who's going through a crisis of Faith struggling the relationship with Hashem and I said you know the relationship with Hashem is no different than any other relationship we have in life for a relationship to thrive not just survive it needs critical key ingredients in its time if you neglect the relationship and you don't make time then how healthy will the relationship be it needs communication communication doesn't just mean that you listen attentively actively you listen not while you're scrolling or typing but you listen fully present but it also means that you talk you have parties in a relationship who listen very well but the other person says no will you say something tell me let me in what's going on in your life tell me your thoughts tell me your feelings tell me let me in so Communication in a relationship and a commitment to medication is not just listening is also being willing to share is vulnerability is having confidence that the other can be your confidante is both directions you need to make time you need to communicate you need to speak and learn the other's love language and the same is true with Hashem you're not just conceptually academically theoretically I'm not just checking off all the boxes Shabbos kosher Mikvah davening tuition check check check check check but there's not the one thing I'm not giving you is I'm not giving you my heart boy and her granddaughter's name Miriam liba she was born on lamid Days by Omer so she was Miriam liba but liba a Yiddish name is a Yiddish name liba is from Hashem wants your heart we spoke about anniversary birthday before so you come home and you throw the chocolate and the card and the flowers in front of the spouse you Mumble happy anniversary the spouses excuse me what you say what's the problem check check flowers check card Jack chocolate Shack happy anniversary check and the other person says I don't want those things I want your heart I want your emotion I want the connection I want the romance I want the energy and Hashem is no different I don't just want your check marks I want your heart are you invested are you involved are you present are you making time are you communicating are you speaking are you vulnerable are you sharing and are you listening actively intensively is all about be present be invested be involved be vulnerable make time communicate not just theoretically but mikudesha's Lee Amin I'm all in I'm going to demonstrate we're going to prove it to you we're going to show you beyond a shadow of a doubt I'm in I feel your presence in my life always and I talk to you when I Turn to You and I tell you and I thank you and I protest to you but I'm talking to you all day long all day long you've heard me say countless times if you don't talk to Hashem when you're not in school you're going to struggle to talk to him when you are unsure if you don't talk to him outside the sitter you're never going to even get started to connect them in the sitter you have to talk to Hashem all day is an ongoing conversation doesn't mean all day long it means our whole day was one long conversation with Hashem Hashem up and get these kids off to carpool not there'll be no traffic and let us get there safely Hashem let me get home and get enjoy my cup of coffee and figure out what I have to do today Hashem thank you for having that conversation that went well and smoothly Hashem please let this cheesecake rise or come out well or do whatever cheesecake is all day long is one long conversation from when we open our eyes modani ah I woke up I'm alive it's all working thank you Hashem until we fall asleep Hashem thank you for a day in which the head count in my house is the same as the way the day started Hashem thank you for a good day where the main thing was working the airplane was still working yeah you know there's some bells and whistles that weren't working I wouldn't mind if you fixed them but Hashem thank you for a day where the main thing was still working from when we wake up till we fall asleep the whole day is one long conversation with Hashem that's where our Bubbies and zadies that was Tavia Fiddler on the Roof that was him in the barn feeding the cows it's just one long conversation with Hashem one long conversation with Hashem we have to reprint it we didn't reprint it if it wrote an article on pesach about her grandmother's to heal him that adorns are home and her Talent They carried her through her life and I say whenever I've referenced this her grandmother probably couldn't translate one sentence up to him or Bobby or Bobby is the chronologist she probably couldn't translate one sentence her heart was on every page of that tell him heart and her tears soaked every page of that Talent she can translate probably am I wrong I'm not knocking her her upbringing her education her background she probably could she was a bright woman educated woman but she couldn't translate that much of it she couldn't tell you the Russian and I'm banned them into this Dove and even Ezra and the mouth she couldn't tell you all the different saying this she couldn't tell you all that on every page to tell him but every pal you should tell him could tell you all about her so we live in a time that we can access and Google and download and memorize and spit back all the information but does the tehelum tell the story of what's in our heart because Hashem wants us he wants our heart he wants a relationship he wants our time he wants our lives to be one long ongoing conversation with him that before everything we do we ask him for help and after everything that happens we thank him it worked out well and it's all one ongoing conversation I met yesterday with a couple they don't live in Boca but they've been listening to the serum they asked to meet very very generous with the shul they want to say thank you which is very sweet of them they shared with me I don't know if they're listening now or later they shared with me I was very moved by it he's uh for 40 years been a stockbroker I've been a day trader and he divides his life into two periods when he was less religious than when he discovered Hashem again with amuna and he's had much more success where now for the last many years before every trade every trade is a day a Trader before every trade he offers a little to Hashem and after every trade whether he made or lost he thanks Hashem and he said it's changed not only his calmness in trading knowing that you do your part you do the best you can you take your most educated guess and the rest is up to Hashem it's changed not only his emotional physical and spiritual health but it's actually traded changed his results but what don't inspiring thing he's a day trader and every day that he trades there's a little feeling he offers before every trade and little Tila he offers after each trade the whole day should be one long davening get in the car Hashem it looks like someone took a bite out of the back of my car I told you about that hit and run somebody hit the car right so every time you drive you think it's taken for granted you're gonna get from point A to point B to give him to give him before the drive it's a given when you arrive that you never even thought for a moment I just went 60 or 70. or so miles an hour I was in a metal box flying down a highway going 60 or 70 or 80 miles an hour on I-95 where the the emblem of I-95 is just Knuckles on a steering wheel in the top of the head right you can't all the fine drivers on I-95 should bench gomal every time you drive on I-95 it's a miracle it's a miracle imagine the word little Fila I bet you my buddy Ben does because he's got kiataima D taped to a steering wheel you're with me we have no idea the near-miss accidents we have no idea everything that worked out that got us where we were going whole day should be once Fila when when you're not invested in the relationship with Hashem you're like why would I do that I dive in chakras and I plan on going to minha why do I have to talk to him between chakra when you're not invested Lee when it's just when it's not Lee I'm not giving you me boy I'm not giving you my heart so then I don't have to say anything in between that's like I say goodbye to you in the morning and I'll see you when I get home why do I have to call you during the day that's not a healthy marriage a healthy marriage is I can't wait to have a break to call you I love when I see your name come up on the caller ID my heart skips a beat when I see your name on the notification that you WhatsApp me that's a healthy marriage not I said goodbye in the morning I'll see you tonight why do I need to check in unless there's an emergency we're good to go until we see each other the end of the day healthy marriages what do you mean we're having a conversation the whole day even when we're not talking in a good marriage we're having a conversation the whole day even when you're not talking you know why because everything you're living you're like oh I've got to tell her that and I want to get her opinion on this and I want to hear her fill me in on how that went so even when you're not together and you're not talking you're still in a conversation the whole day and then you'll catch up that's the relationship with Hashem it is a conversation the entire day when you're talking to him and in between talking to him you're catching up you're asking for up you're thinking you're reflecting you're protesting you're angry that's part of a relationship too is the protest and the frustration the ups and the Downs all that is also evidence that there's a real relationship if you're never protesting you're frustrated or angry you're also not putting your Lee in the relationship when I meet with couples and there's fire and anger and frustration there's this possibility to their marriage making it and when they're both just checked out when there's apathy and indifference that's when that's when there's a lot of trouble there's no Lee the heart's not in it a heart can be in it when you're frustrated and angry and you're passionate net it's because you still want more and expect more and demand more and crave more this possibility this hope is the future Shem we got very far today Friday morning to stand all together arm and arm with Jews around the world at the base of the mountain to hear Hashem speaking to USAF that great sound of Hashem speaking he's speaking that never wavered that continues to reverberate in our ears the Timeless message of his Torah that continues to inform and Inspire our lives and may we stand there together United as one accepting his Torah putting all of our heart into that relationship Hashem we are betrothed with all every part of who we are and to begin and continue that conversation which we're speaking to him all day long stay happy stay healthy stay holy wishing you a beautiful