Living With Emunah (Part 203): Living with the Shepherd

good morning welcome back to living with a moon our weekly gathering to review what we already know that there is a creator who loves us who's intimately involved in our lives who's always there for us and to whom we must be so grateful and if we cling to him if we stick with him if we attach ourselves to him we have no reason to ever worry to envy to be arrogant or anxious but we can live a life of tranquility a life of peace and we'll see benefits physically emotionally spiritually in every single which way i want to thank our generous amount of sponsors series for the year dr xavier bella morgan in memory of dr brian galbet and in memory of bella's mother dr ellen shanzra thank you so much for your generosity it means the world if you'd like to sponsor a future sheer please go on beerusonline.org sponsor beerusonline.org sponsor we've made a convenient one easy place choose the date fill out the dedication make the payment all and be able to sponsor total learning and growth and amuna in honor and memory of someone thank you so much in advance for your generosity i want to begin not by delving back into bittel we have been learning morgan's turn and the notion of bittel how to nullify our sense of selves it's not about us it's not about our ego but if we can sublimate if we can submit if we can surrender if we can recognize there is a creator there is an almighty he has a plan and therefore never get bent out of shape then we can live truly live a meaningful life we can truly be alive as opposed to be caught up in our own ego and sense ourselves we'll get back to that in a moment but i want to share with you an insight from our parasha he said say whenever you're listening to the ammunition whether it is this week's parashat or not the message nevertheless will be relevant at the very end of the parish of key states the torah tells us that we have to be very careful when it comes to business dealings we have to be scrupulous and vigilant and careful and honest we have to have integrity don't have two different weights and measures in your pocket large and small and switch them out evan schlemmer we have to have very honest weights and measures when we weigh the food when we ate the ingredients when we the materials in order to figure out the price we have to have honest weights and measures don't cut corners don't bend rules don't cheat people have honesty have integrity why the manual longevity because if you do it you'll truly be alive it is an abomination whoever cheats in business whoever is dishonest on their income taxes whoever cuts corners whoever is ruthlessly competitive it is a abomination over we mentioned yesterday in the parshashir that rav benson zaks the menachem explains what is the toeva what's an abomination to god colossae of el if colossa if you're observing torah in mitzvos you volunteer and yet you're dishonest in your weights and measures yet you cut corners and you lie and you cheat in business yet you have no integrity sh that's the toe eva to hashem it's an abomination it's an abomination it's duplicitous it's hypocritical you claim to embrace god you claim to love life with a munna and you and yet you leave god in the shul you leave god in the tehillim circle you leave god in the basement you leave god in the daffodi and when you go out to life when you go out to business when you go out to the market there you're ruthless there you're competitive there you cut corners that's a toe the colossa ela and yet you cut corners that's a toeva hashem has no patience the rashi on this uh the very next section in the end of pasha's kisete the very next passage zach the very next passage is remember what amalek did to you on your way from mitzrayim what is the connection between having honest weights and measures honesty and integrity in business and not being attacked by amalek so rashid tells us based on the madrish tanhuma that in shakarta bemidos if we're dishonest and we lie and we cheat and we're deceitful when it comes to measures when it comes to business then have a dog one should be worried and afraid because the enemy is coming if you're dishonest with weights and measures if you cut corners with business then fear that the enemy will attack and the greatness of naftali to you the berlin wonders what is rashi talking about what is the connection what is the juxtaposition between being dishonest in business and then being vulnerable to attack from amalek what does one thing have to do with the other so he points out that it says that when it comes to the attack of amalek we said hayes just at the moment that we were wondering is god among us is god involved in our lives does god care what we do does god provide maybe everything's random maybe it's natural maybe it's coincidence maybe it's happenstance and that is what amalek attacked when we don't live lives with a consciousness and a mindfulness that there's a god there is a creator that we report to him he we work for him he doesn't work for us if we don't live lives with the recognition that there are consequences to our actions and to our behaviors if we live lives thinking that we are victims of randomness and that the world and life are all chance then we get attacked by amalek because amalek is a shark it's the next passage attack us happenstance they seize on that the very fact that we have some doubt the very fact that we have uncertainty the very fact that these thoughts creep in and we wonder is everything in my life by design was it curated and choreographed from above or is it coincidence is it random is a chance and in that moment that pause of doubt in that moment that crack of worry of uncertainty boom amalek attacks they happen upon us on the way and they infiltrate and penetrate and teach us to subscribe to an attitude in a philosophy of life of happenstance of mikra so says then it's if we say to ourselves is god in our midst that's when they come that's the connection to dishonest weights and measures what are you talking about dishonest weights and measures that's interpersonal that's between me man and man that's me cheating my fellow man when it comes to god there i'm whole there i'm complete i shuckle and i dive and i the longest everything so what are you talking about what does one thing have to do with the other and this is the inside of the netsif then it's says business is where the rubber meets the road of emunah it's easy to shuckle in shul it's easy to say to him at home but when you go out to the workplace to the boardroom to the operating room when you go out to the courtroom when you go out to business and to life do you believe in god do you take him with you do you recognize and realize that he's the one who empowers us he gives us our skills he gives us our strength he gives us our ideas he gives us our creativity our entrepreneurship he gives us our vision it's all him do we recognize that the way things turn out the results that come after we take our initiative and effort it is all from above a person who cheats a person who has dishonest weights and measures a person who manipulates the scale a person who cuts corners who thinks the only way i can get rich is if i cheat and i steal that person is a coffee that person doesn't believe in god that person is asking hayes is god really in my midst does god really provide is all that i have really by design that person hesitates they have doubt and uncertainty and that's why they cheat and that's why they cut corners and that's where they lie and that's why they steal such an individual when you steal from fellow man you is an act not only of you're not only violating the interpersonal relationship but nothing but when a person steals from a fellow man it is an act of kfira it is an act of it is an act of heresy it's an act of denying god's very existence because the person who believes that god exists says you know what i work hard i try my hardest and then i let go and i let god i will not ruthlessly compete i will help my competitor because god is so outstanding that god has enough for both of us to be able to make it both of us to succeed both of us to become wealthy i'm not going to ruthlessly compete i'm not going to cut corners i'm not going to cheat and steal from my customers because if god wants me to do well god has ordained from above how much i'm meant to have so when a person misreports business expenses on their tax returns when a person is dishonest in business it's not just interpersonally where they failed they have failed in the relationship between man and god it is a very act of khira it is a very active period and that says is why the story in our parsha of dishonest weights and measures is immediately adjacent it is juxtaposed to the story of the attack of amalek because emunah doesn't is not relegated to the shul a moon is not relegated to the base madrish and moon is not relegated to our homes when we're zagging when we're saying to hillam emunah is in business is in life whether we're honest and whether we have integrity and whether we're kind and whether we help even our competitor that's what shows that we have amunah do we live with hashem do we take him do we carry with us everywhere we go you know we say in mismo david and tell him the lord is my shepherd i shall not lack the simple understanding is hashem when hashem is my shepherd then lo aksar i'm not missing i'm not lacking i have everything i need i have everything i want i recognize that what i have is what is meant for me hashem rohi lo aksar the lord is my shepherd i shall not lack i'm not missing anything but there's another way to understand this hashem is my shepherd hashem may i never be may i never be missing in feeling the word roi means shepherd roi shepherd comes from rhea a friend a shepherd is the best friend of their flock a shepherd has to keep the flock in order a shepherd protects the flock shepherd nourishes and nurtures the flock a shepherd is responsible for the flock a shepherd takes care of the flock but sometimes a member of the flock a little sheep allah it goes off the way it veers off the path that sheep has a mind of its own it thinks it knows better and it doesn't follow with the rest of the herd the sheep thinks i'm going to go off the dara i'm going to go off this path i'm going to explore on my own and in that moment the shepherd sometimes has to give a shtickle patch has to give a little bit of a nudge to the sheep to bring it back on the path but you know the sheep knows that shepherd he loves me that shepherd brings me to food to eat the shepherd brings me to water to drink and the shepherd protects me when the weather's inclement or when there's an attacker that's coming on and therefore the shepherd understands the sheep understands that all the shepherd does is coming from love rohi a shepherd is arya is a great friend hashem rawi god who is our shepherd lo aksar so it means i'm not lacking if i embrace him as my shepherd but it also means a tfila hashem rawi let him be my shepherd lo may i never be lacking in feeling in that very feeling that he is indeed my shepherd so where do i take him to the boardroom operating room to the to the uh boardroom operating room and the law courtroom i take him with me to business i take him with me to life i take him with me to the gym in the supermarket i take him with me everywhere i go and when i leave him behind when i close the talon or sitter i close him out with it and then i'm ruthless then i cheat and i cut corners then i have dishonest in weights and measures now i'm vulnerable to be attacked by amalek because the very fact that i think that god's not the one who provides what i need the very fact that i think that i have to cheat and steal in order to regain because i don't trust that god will give what i need is an act of kira and it means that i am it means i'm doubtful it means i worry it means i have uncertainty if god is in fact in my midst or not and therefore and therefore i'm vulnerable to the attack of amalek an attack of a shark that's arts field that's our hope that's our wish our hope and our wish is that hashem rawi that hashem should be my reya my best friend lo aksar and never be missing out okay let's dive back into the and the bittle that we've been learning about from rav ichimeyer so he's been describing to us the four levels of bittel that a person needs to go through life i feel like an ich like an eye like an ego i feel like i exist i look in the mirror and i feed myself i pamper myself i put on this handsome looking tie and i think there's an eye there's an ego i have a sense of identity independent of god it's true i live in his world and he operates it that's the first level of bitter the bittle of kabbalah the first bittle is i exist independent of god but i defer to god i report to god i submit to god in the end of the day i work for him he doesn't work for me second level was bitter bemidos not just intellectually to know i report to him but to be in a relationship to be invested in a relationship to feel loved to feel awe to feel closeness to feel longing to feel clinging to feel there's a romance to the relationship with hashem not just a bittle with a sense intellectually not just to study about god but to nullify and to submit and surrender with a sense of emotion with a feeling to god the third level was bitter yeash the third level was to have my entire feeling that when i'm the presence of god there is no me all there is is him and the fourth level is bitter mitsius i don't even exist all of us are a matrix we're part of the illusion of the world but we only exist because hashem imagines he wills our existence to be and then we last left off last week with this very very important balance richard meyer spoke about he says if you live with too much bitter if we nullify ourselves too much to the point that we don't even think we exist then you can become very fat passive you can become very fatalistic you can assume why try why work why do it's really all god on the other hand if you think really it's all me i exist it's my ego it's my i my my ich i exist then you're going to work excessively then you're going to take too much initiative then you're going to take too much credit too much blame you're going to cut god out of the equation our mission is to do both our mission is to do both we start every effort by first remembering that i don't exist on my own really and just an extension i'm just a shliyak really i'm a messenger i'm an agent of god really everything is hashem i really don't exist i'm an illusion really hashem hashem he is all that exists now that he's what exists and he's positioned me he's put me in this world at this time in this place he's given me this personality the skill set now i have work to do now i have a difference to make akra after we feel the bittle after we submit and surrender that the outcome will be whatever he wills and that he is the senior partner and he is responsible for our success now i get to work now i take initiative now i do everything that i can with all my effort for hashem is barack in order to honor god i have to remember the entire time that i'm not the one doing it i'm just a messenger and an agent for god saying so i act as an agent i act empowered i'm on a mission i'm sent out i'm charged i'm the most powerful by the king of kings by god almighty but on the one hand the fact that he has sent me as an agent is empowering on the other hand the fact that he has all the power and i'm just his agent makes me submit and surrender feel a sense of bitter but bring us even though externally if you check the security camera if you were to watch externally on the surface it looks like i'm the one doing it the surgeon's the one who saves the life the doctor is the one who diagnoses the patient the lawyer is the one who makes the successful argument the rabbi is the one who gives the gives the drusha and the chef or the cook is the one who makes the great meal and the examples go on and on externally superficially it looks like we're the ones who do it the amish and truth hashem but the truth is god is the one who makes everything happen it's all just an illusion he is behind that illusion he is the matrix he is making it all happen and what is the sign what is the symbol what is the evidence when a person lives the truth and they live the reality that god is really the one who does a person doesn't get bent out of shape we make our best effort we do our best and the outcome now is up to god if i realize that i'm simply the agent i'm the delivery mechanism i'm the instrument i'm the vehicle but i am not the source then i do my best and once i've done my best and i can take pride in having done my best i've completed my mission now the outcome and the result is entirely up to god so i make my best effort and i do my best but i don't ever get bent out of shape i don't worry i don't spend too much time on the outcome because that's up to god for yash only god knows what is truly the best outcome he knows the way it is meant to be so we do our best to be the best agents that we can be we do our best to fulfill the mission as best we can but in the end of the day it is up to hashem in the end of the day it is all up to it is all up to god and he says here in a footnote ludogma so we give an example when it comes to prayer meets beaches the moment that we have an audience with the king of kings in the moment that we have his ear hashem god move my lips give me the words move my lips empower me enable me enrich me elevate me hashem make me believe that my words matter let me dive and not only for my own well-being let me dive in for the people around me let me dive into the world let me dive in for those who need it you can't stand up to dhamma and say mia you take those three steps forward and you're about to in a very direct first person way challenge god you're going to ask god god please give me this give me that give me the other thing so if you really felt me if you succeeded in bitter what kind of davoner would you be who am i what am i i'm a nobody i'm unworthy i'm inadequate what right do i have to stand before you i have nothing to say so you'll never doubt it you'll never doubt it um on the other hand if you dive in and then you walk away and you say now i'm going to get answered boy did i have kavanagh i concentrated i darvened well i was present in the moment i was mindful with everything i said now i'm guaranteed to be answered so now you've also made a terrible mistake you have to realize that the whole purpose of davening is not that god automatically answers or not that we're entitled that we deserve we ask and now the result is up to him so therefore what happens when you dive in from the bottom of your heart what happens when you give it at all what happens when you're mindful and you're present you concentrate and you brought an energy and an enthusiasm beyond and it turns out the answer is no do you accept it do you say you know what now is the time to submit and surrender now i have to practice bittel after i've taken my initiative after i've given my all after i've given it my everything if the answer is no the answer is no now i have to submit and surrender now i have to practice bitter if you're willing to do that then you successfully are practicing bittle but if you're not if you're not willing to say that god has his own bonus the almighty has his own calculations and the deposit of my davening will be withdrawn at another time but you know what i did my part the rest is up to god then in fact it's really all about you it's not about god to begin with so the idea of bitter is very very important to create this balance you can't take no initiative you can't sit back and be passive or fatalistic and say god will provide and god will heal and god will take care that's not the way god works god gives us gifts he gives us opportunity he gives us the ability to heal ourselves to protect ourselves to vaccinate to take care of ourselves he gives us the ability to earn an income to provide a livelihood he gives us all kinds of ability and we are obligated to take that initiative however once we've taken the initiative once we've given it all then we have to sit back and say let go let god it's entirely up to him davin as if it's all up to you and then work as david as if it's all up to god and work as if it is all up to you all right we have to cut a little short today thank you for understanding if you'd like to sponsor a future shir beerusonline.org sponsor honor me please by subscribing to our youtube channel you'll be notified in real time every time we go live and we can learn together speaking of which nine o'clock tonight behind the bema with the great hall of famer the great five-time world series champion mariano rivera the greatest saver of all time of the new york yankees very spiritual very religious in this conversation we'll ask him a lot about his faith in god his love of the jewish people and his commitment to israel it's at nine o'clock tonight behind the bema.com join us live for behind the bema until next time stay happy stay healthy and stay holy