#53: Behind Behind the Bima

From Boca Raton, Florida, Rabbis Ephraim Goldberg, Philip Moskowitz, and Josh Brody are taking you behind the Bima. The BRS Rabbis schmooze about contemporary issues and talk to special guests who give a behind-the-scenes look at how they got to where they are and what keeps them going. Welcome to Behind the Bima. Good evening. It's Wednesday night, 9:00 p.m. I am Rabbi Ephraim Goldberg, your host, joined by my dear friends and colleagues, Rabbi Gavriel Pinchas Moskowitz and Rabbi Joshua Brody. And we are here to take you behind the Bima. Behind the Bima throwback edition. Very, very excited to be together tonight. I want to begin by thanking our generous sponsors, new friends, but quickly dear friends, Jeremy and Merrill Strauss, who sponsored many of the Shiurim this week and behind the Bima tonight in memory of Jeremy's father, Michael Strauss. All of a shalom is the shalom of Aliza Strauss is our extraordinary people doing really, really remarkable things. We thank them for their generosity and we thank them for the difference they are making in Klal Yisrael. So, a huge thank you. If you'd like to sponsor a future episode of one of the top podcasts in the world, then please email Lee at brsonline.org, l e e at brsonline.org. Thanks to you for your rating and reviews. All right. the charts last week, so please continue to do so. Take a moment. Just take out your phone, rate, review, take one moment, and we greatly appreciate it. If you're watching on YouTube, feel free to subscribe for a moment. Uh gentlemen, Rabbis, how are you this fine evening? I am phenomenal. Rabbi Brody, you had a lot on your mind pre-show. Busy, busy week here in Boca. We're actually uh getting ready to move this summer, so we started selling stuff. One of the things we just put up on What's that? Can you just clarify what it means you're getting ready to move? Like to another community. I'll leave No, we are not moving. We would never leave this community unless we would make aliyah, which we're not making aliyah yet. But we're moving a few blocks away. It's not something we wanted to do, but because of this housing uh uh you know what's going on right now with housing, the house that we're renting is now for sale. And you won't Right. You could live in the house of of behind the bema. You know like Would you Whoever buys that house Whoever buys that house, will you give them a tour? I'll give them the official official tour, VIP. Show them where all the I'll show you them where we actually film behind the bema. I was going to say it's hard to say that you have the rights to come back on Wednesday nights to re-film behind the bema there every Wednesday night. Yeah, it's going to be weird. Do I have to take a picture of my background so I'll have the same background Will they have Will they have better Wi-Fi cuz you're a little bit higher right now. Who knows? Who knows? What's the little bit wondering Everyone's wondering um where what Who's our guest? What's What's our guest tonight Behind the Bema has become known and beloved for the guests. Really, frankly, I I can't speak for the two of you, but I don't know if we're much, but these guests are of extraordinary life stories, experiences, wisdom. They have a lot to share. That's why we are excited to spend our time with them to gain from them and to bring their wisdom to you. And we ask for your help when we ask you to help us promote the podcast. It's really because we want to get them out. So Who's our guest tonight and why don't we have a guest tonight? So to clear the air or address the elephant in the room, the answer is we have a tremendously prominent, high-profile, super exciting guest who uh was supposed to be on tonight, but part of their busy, high-profile life is they were unable to make it tonight. And so um we waited till the last minute to see if they'd be able to get it done. That's why we didn't advertise or promote who it was. In the end, please God, they will join us a different week. But you know what? We're grateful. It's the opportunity to throw back to the three of us speaking. Now we'll find out who really watches Behind the Bema for what. The Who watches it for the guests and who watches it for the band. We're the hardcore fans. You just want to hear us kibitz with each other. Who are the hardcore fans? The truth is, for a lucky listener who's listening live, feel free to comment that you'd like to come on for a moment to ask a question or to offer a comment, and and maybe we'll send you the the link for you to join us live for others to see. So, in the comments, if you have a question, something you want us to speak about tonight, and ask the rabbis about Boca Raton Synagogue, about us, about our lives, about our thoughts, our opinions on things, feel free to submit it. We're happy to address it. And if you want to join us for a moment, we'll uh consider that as well. So, a lot of lot going on though. A lot going on in you a question. When we first started the show, did you ever imagine us bringing on guests? Cuz the first few shows were were were guestless. It was just the three of us. Was that an idea from the beginning? You remember what it was first called? Coffee Talk. Right. Coffee Talk. Coffee Talk. Who drinks coffee at 9:00 at night? Coffee Talk. Cindy Schrier is here. So, we're we're good to go. We have a Schrier present. So, we have Coffee Talk. Big week. Big mazel tov to the Schriers. There is definitely a lot going on around us in the world, in our country, news out of Israel tonight with a the Dimona reactor and that area siren going off, rocket launched, Israel retaliating. Hopefully it does not escalate. And we're wishing them well, thinking about Avigail Brody. I was just thinking that. The one who flipped the siren. That's why I was smiling as you announced that. Everyone's like, why is he probably smiling when you said this? Bombs going off. I know why you're smiling, cuz you can picture Avigail by accident hitting the siren. Flipping the or hitting the wrong siren. Yeah. We're proud of her. She's the best. had our conversation with our lone soldiers the other day, and I asked each one of them, you know, tell us something cool about your service that might, you know, be unexpected or people might not might not be aware of. So, the first two guys went, and it was one of the guys was a sniper, and he was telling us about how to be a sniper. And the other guy is a driver, he's telling us how what it's like to be a driver in the army. And the third person, a woman in our community, said I can't tell you what I do. She said I go into the office and I do some computer work and I go home. I said, "Can you be a little bit more explicit?" She said, "No." I said, "Wink once if something you did last week affected something in Iran." Right. And she she got very quiet very quickly. I cut off the power to the nuclear reactor. That's what I Right. Exactly. Yeah, we're we're we dive in all the time, of course, for all our brothers and sisters in Israel and around the world, but for the members, the courageous members serving and volunteering, we are deeply, deeply appreciative. So, um Yeah, there's a little definitely a lot going on. Of course, we're a political, so we don't address that, but I'll I'll raise this. We are based in had the privilege today to convert four individuals, a mother and three children, which is always exciting when we welcome new members of the tribe, new people to the Jewish people. I find it extraordinarily inspiring to ask them about their story, the detective work we've talked about in the past that goes into wanting to know why somebody convert and and when you when you know their sincerity, when you feel and when you're confident in their sincerity, doing all that you need in order to bring them as full members of the Jewish people, it's a really exciting, fulfilling, beautiful moment, and beautiful experience. Wow. as we've spoken about in the past, it's very motivational for us as well. You know, we were all born into this, we didn't have much of a choice, and while each one of us goes through our own journey and struggles along the way, it's and I know you feel the same way, it's very inspiring to watch other people who did not have to be a part of this to be part of the journey because they were looking for some more more meaning and purpose in their lives, and to be able to follow that trajectory all the way until the end, it's really heroic what they go through and the sacrifice that they make and they they're modern-day Avraham Avinu's. They leave everything behind, they take on a completely new path in life, and they do it because they they're looking for more and they're searching. They are and we don't always appreciate that. The the path doesn't end after the conversion. It's complicated because their relatives remain non-Jewish. And how therefore to have family reunions and experience holidays, um relationships with children, and not only irreligious but non-Jewish family. Of course, can be navigated but is complicated. So, the heroism and the courage continues even beyond taking that leap to actually convert and become Jewish but to navigate the really complicated area You know, the Hazal or Rabbi the Hazal tells us that kasheh gerim ke-sapachas that converts can be difficult to the Jewish people and it's a debate exactly why but the consensus understanding and the one that really inspires us is that cuz converts really put the pressure on us. Here they chose it, they joined it, they took that leap. We're born into it and we often either resent it, neglect it, or don't feel the joy of it. And so therefore they kind of obligate us cuz that passion, that enthusiasm which hopefully becomes contagious and not a source of resentment. And as you said, I don't think we fully appreciate that. In many respects, the hardest part starts with conversion. You articulated in terms of the family but even in just in terms of regular growth, the whole time in everyone's you're heroic, you're doing heroic things, you're there's your your meteoric rise to Judaism and all of a sudden you convert and the next day you show up to shul and you're a regular person. And you have regular responsibilities and that glitz and glamour, so to speak, is no longer there. And there are the ups and downs of being a Jew and we convert or we at least we see a lot of single people down here in South Florida who wish to convert and there are enormous challenges afterwards in terms of marriage and and some of the challenges with that. So, I don't think everyone appreciates that however hard the conversion process is, those challenges, as you said, continue on long into the future. Yes. Yes. The the uh first of all, Ron asks, one of our listeners, do you dissuade people when they come to you to convert? And the answer is that we don't actively dissuade. We're living in a time that we don't want to be rude, so we respond to, of course, those who reach out, but we have a whole system. We we're part of the Beis Din of America's network of Batei Din that we are accepted and reputable in by the Chief Rabbinate of Israel and around the world. So, people we work through sponsoring rabbis. When there's a candidate for conversion, they have to call a local rabbi willing to sponsor them, oversee them, supervise them. And the sponsoring rabbi comes and advocates for them, and of course, we meet several times, and we have expectations, rules, we test them, and we make sure they're socially integrated into community. But ultimately, to an enormous degree, we're relying on sponsoring rabbis. So, we're not rude, and we don't ignore, and we don't dissuade actively, but we will um cross-examine sounds harsh or like you're trying to catch someone, but we will try to understand with some real detective work, why would somebody leave a life we'll tell them, you know, someone say, "I'm spiritual or I'm connected or I think this is the most right thing to do." So, that's great. Keep the seven Noachide laws and be spiritual, and pray every day, but why would you want this 613 laws? Why would you want this rigid system? Why would you want the cost of shmurah matzah on Pesach and the cost of tuition and the anti-Semitism and so on and so forth? So, we'll say all the reasons trying to convince them why they should not want it, but we don't I wouldn't say that we actively dissuade in a way that could be perceived as as rude or as rejectionary. Can I tell you a great Yeah, go ahead. Let me tell you a funny story. When when we got a call probably about 3 4 years ago, there was a girl in FAU. She came through Hillel and uh I don't know how we got in touch with each other, but she said she really wanted to convert because you know, she has this this strong affinity towards the Jewish people. I said, "Well, what why why do you have it?" She says, "Well, her her her great-grandparents were were Jewish." So, I said, "Oh, that's that's that's pretty interesting, you know." So, I'm just Mom's side? Dad's side? Just which Yeah, that was uh my mom's mom's mom. Right. Newsflash. Newsflash. She's like, I'm like, you don't have to be actually Jewish. She says, "No, but I really want to convert." Right. Like You don't need You're done. It's over. Welcome. Right. Welcome back. There's a There There are fascinating phenomena we see down here, and I don't remember if we ever spoken about this in Behind the Bima, so forgive me if we have, but we see fascinating phenomena all the time, including, you know, you'll see a Jewish guy who finds a non who meets a non-Jewish woman and is courting her. At some point, he realizes either his parents or his grandmother or grandparents will say, "You marry a non-Jew, we're going to kill you." So, he says, "Okay, I got to get her converted because I want to still access the inheritance." So, he brings to us, and the woman will start to learn, study, observe, experience, grow, connect with community. She does magnificent. It's beautiful. I love this. He's like, "One second." He's like, "I didn't sign up for this." I didn't sign up for this. Exactly. So, you know, sometimes then the woman will stay with us and um and the man will drop out. Or sometimes the man actually becomes the baal teshuvah. He takes it on, too, experiencing the beauty through her. Rabbi Davis, our colleague, has a term for that. Great line. You know, he calls it, "Instead of losing one, we gain two." So, instead of one person going off the derech or losing them, we've gained two observant, beautiful Jews. So, it's it's really, really fascinating. Today's, you know, I don't want to speak about Obviously, nobody knows who I'm who I'm talking about, but the truth is that sometimes we have to do conversions, let's just say, of someone who's previously converted, of a woman who had a conversion and then had children, and then when she looked into it, it was determined that the rabbi or the beis din that converted her are not accepted universally. They're not accepted by the highest standards. They're not accepted, let's say, by the chief rabbinate of Israel, and people want to make aliyah. And, you know, there's a lot of criticism about when there was an effort by the beis din of America to create a network and to centralize the battei din, to not make them subjective and every rabbi making shabbos and converts for themselves, but to create a a system of standards and so on. There was a lot of criticism that we're taking away the autonomy of eyes and we are disempowering and so on and so forth. But you know, the problem is that don't you want to serve the converts? So, that that's who matters the most are are these people. They're very vulnerable, they're fragile, and they're coming to us for help. And so, when when a rabbi out of the goodness of their heart does a conversion not through a network or through a process which is recognized, and they think they're doing something so kind and others are unwilling to be that kind, in fact, it's cruel, not kind, because that person will find out later in life, often in a very harsh way, that in fact, they're not accepted or recognized. So, we find ourselves sometimes doing what we call gear l'chumra, where we are reconverting people and because possibly it wasn't acceptable or it's not recognized by all, which brings with it questions. Do you make a bracha when you immerse in the mikvah if you're only doing it as a chumra as a stringency? If the couple have children, they were married, she converted before their marriage, so do they need to remarry? If she really just converted right now, what what solidifies that marriage? Do they need to remarry? Are you allowed to make a bracha? Or do you just put the ring on her finger in front of two witnesses? So, it's fascinating both in the world of conversion, but also raising the issue of sometimes there are um radical or pioneering or rabbis or leaders in a lot of arenas of life who project or put themselves forward as if they are the compassionate, kind, flexible ones, when in fact, they're not doing an act of kindness, but an act of cruelty, cuz they're setting a person on a trajectory in which ultimately, unfortunately, it's not going to go well. So, um you know, it's possible that sometimes such a woman and her children will need to uh convert again. It's fascinating what happens when you convert a pregnant woman. The base din, do they have to be aware that she's pregnant? Sometimes you convert a woman, she is uh visibly pregnant, although no man or anyone should ever ask anyone, are you pregnant or when the baby's due? Um you know, unless they're asking you to cut the umbilical cord at that point. So, uh sometimes it's visible, but other times you find out later. So, then it's a fascinating question if the woman converted she was pregnant, but the three rabbis didn't know. How do you treat the fetus inside her? Did the fetus inside her also need conversion? We just don't treat her body as a barrier to the water and the fetus. Or no, the fetus until it's born Uber Yarahima, maybe the fetus is no different than her lungs, her kidney, her heart. It's an organ of the mother till it's born and therefore it doesn't need conversion. So, the rabbis didn't need to know she was pregnant. We're not going to review all the laws of conversion, but there are It's crazy how it goes. No, they're fascinating questions that come up. Everything I just mentioned very possibly came up very recently. Um keep the questions coming in the in the comments in the comment section cuz we're happy and excited to address them. Who remembers the very first guest we ever had on behind the Bema? I saw that question. I was trying to remember. Is Chai Schechter Rabbi Chai Schechter? No. Oh, was it Was it the comedian? Modi? Oh, it was Modi? We need the fact checker to tell us. Any of our listeners want to enter a raffle to find out? Now, here's another question. Did we have our first guest on behind the Bema or did we have our first guest guest on Coffee Talk? Oh, that's right. I forgot that. Yep. Our very first guest was It was It was for us We weren't thinking that it was Coffee Talk Three Rabbis trying to connect with our our wonderful community whom we weren't seeing cuz the world was in a lockdown. And then Yocheved, my wife's cousin Michael Goldsmith who survived a month on a respirator in the ICU with Corona where several times the family was ready to say goodbye to him, came out and came home from the hospital to a heroic welcome and he just marked the anniversary of that. And and he and his wonderful wife were our first guests. Was it Coffee Talk or Behind the Bema? Thank you to our fact checker who was invited on by the way. Wasn't Simon Mirsky? It wasn't Simon Mirsky? No, Simon came on one one time only. We definitely had Simon. We had the moms. Who remembers when we went from Coffee Talk to Behind the Bima? Why did we change names? Good question. weren't drinking coffee anymore. Good good questions, right? I think it's a great question. It's how do we all come up with names? Like there's so many different There's There's so many different things that we've named, right? The weekly, the show, your classes, the different, you know, you sit around the table and everyone throws out Right from the and forth on this one for a while, though. There were a lot of different options out there. We should We should pull up the old texts and reveal the other options for what Behind the Bima was going to be called. I think Behind the Bima works really well. I really think it captures what we're trying to do here, which is take you behind the Bima and get a sense of the conversations, the processes, the thoughts. So, let's go Behind the Bima. We met this week already several times about Shavuos. Rabbis across the country, across the world are trying to plan Shavuos. So, you'll say, "Plan Shavuos. Okay, what do you have to tell me about it?" The answer is because last Shavuos was much easier to plan than this Shavuos. You know why? There was nothing to plan. Cuz last Shavuos the world was shut down. It was You were scared to leave your front door. So, the big radical, you remember, the risky, crazy Sit out in your driveway. Everyone bring a folding chair to your driveway and create the outdoor space base medrish. It was about 400° humid and maybe a little bit rain. Yes, so last year was easy to plan. Two years ago was easy to plan. When Shavuos was normal, easier to plan. When there was no Shavuos, I had the best Shavuos of my life last year. I mean, other than all the other ones where I get to teach the community and so on and so forth. But But last year I stayed up all night long with my two sons-in-law. We learned through the night. We had a vasikin minyan outdoors. Remember, we weren't inside yet. I just saw a picture recently how we had We remember we had three areas around the campus. We had cones sectioned off. It was It was really crazy, crazy times. And that was last So, how do you plan this Shavuos? Let's go behind the bema. What are the thoughts? What are the considerations? What are the questions? Rebbe Moskowitz, what what are we struggling with? Well, I struggle with everything. First of all, the million-dollar question in the room is masks, right? Right? Are you going to require people to wear masks throughout the night? Are you going to create maskless sections for people in the shul for those who are fully vaccinated? Or certain rooms even at a distance people might be able to go. Um are you doing food throughout the night? How are you doing food throughout the night? Are you doing food indoors? Are you doing food outdoors? Um are people going to stay up all night if they have to wear the masks? Are Um do we blow up the whole model? Do we use this as an opportunity to rethink all of Shavuos night in that classic model that we've used up until now? Maybe we try some different types of opportunities. We have the enormous enormous closeness here, the enormous privilege this year of hosting Rabbi Aaron Rapps and Schachter, um which will be a great benefit to all of us and to our learning over Shavuos. But how do you How do you utilize the greatness of our Schachter in as many slots as possible and provide those with opportunities? So, those are some of the challenges that we are Just some. Just some. And by the way, again, we're not asking for sympathy, but a person gets the brochure or you see the website and you get excited, "Oh, the Shavuos at BRS." You know, they probably took 20 minutes and and planned Shavuos. But the considerations that go into it, the calculations to determine what's a good theme and who gives the classes and the slots as Rebbe Moskowitz just described. And most importantly this year, will people stay up all night with masks, without masks, indoors, outdoors? These issues are evolving, changing regularly. People have such different opinions. If you're vaccinated, um if you're not yet vaccinated, you have a different attitude, perhaps. If you're never going to get vaccinated, where do you fit in? What's your attitude? And we mentioned in the past, but I think it it's it's important to mention again. What Everyone has an opinion. Everyone listening to this right now has an opinion. They're like, "Oh, that's an easy Of course you can't do this." Or "Of course you can do that. What they don't realize is that you and I are being bombarded with hundreds and hundreds of people who all think that they have the simple solution to that. Right. And each person's solution is against the other person's solution. And our job is to take all of those suggestions and to figure out what's really safest and best for the community in a way that's going to bring people back together, magnify the Torah learning, and of course keep everyone safe. And that's the real struggle. Yeah. Yeah. Listen, there's been a big question that's existed for the entire last 13, 14 months, which is, you know, we have a principle which is it's easy to be stringent. It's easy to be strict. It's easy to say no. It's a lot harder to say yes. So, on the one hand, you know, when it was considered to be extraordinary times and enormous high risk and high statistics and huge contagion and a lot unknown about a disease and a health care system that threatened to be under overrun. So, then the answer was that, you know, you got to be strict. On any case of doubt, you got to be strict. Are we still in that same place? Or have we shifted now where in the state of Florida, we can't speak for elsewhere, if you're 16 years or older up, you could be vaccinated. My 16-year-old daughter has her second shot coming up. So, we'll soon arrive at the time at which if you're 16 or up, you can be vaccinated. So, does that change the calculation now? Do we now And within our community, predominantly people are vaccinated. Right. And it So, we did Do we design now rules and regulations that reflect the reality that if you're an adult who wants to be vaccinated, you can be. The highest risk population can be vaccinated. That doesn't mean we should be reckless or careless in the policies, but can we be a little bit more lenient? Can we adopt airplane rules in shul? What are airplane rules? I There are countless people who we know travel, they fly, they have during Corona, where they're sitting not 6 ft, not 3 ft, they're sharing an armrest with another human being they don't know, and they lower their mask to drink or to eat and then put it back. And I know air filtration system in an airplane may be different, but I don't know if it is. So, can we adopt an airplane rules? Let's say on Shavuot night, you should wear masks, try to be distanced, but if you're learning with someone, take a drink, you can lower it, there's more. So, that's the question. And then which airline and do we throw people off the airline? So, that's Now, speaking of your airline analogy, we also made a significant change in the show last week where we adopted a vaccinated section where the chairs are a little bit closer, and not everyone loved that change in the show, Rabbi Goldberger. Do you want to share your analogy as to why not everyone loved that? Yeah, of course. What we did is we created a vaccinated section where the chairs were closer together again because people, according to the CDC, who are vaccinated do not need to be distanced even though they still have masks, which also arguably they don't need to still be doing, although I know variants and we don't know in the future, but we are still doing. And yet, a lot of vaccinated people are not sitting in them even though we incentivize them. Rabbi Moscowitz brilliantly suggested we incentivize them by putting back the good chairs. Right. We have these really We have chairs that are plush, comfy chairs. Yeah, like you need to say Krishna Malchut before the drasha when you're sitting in one of those chairs. They are good, good chairs. So, we incentivized and motivated people to get vaccinated, but many are not sitting in them for a very simple reason, because they're not 6 ft from the next person. So, it The whole world's going to have to learn to adjust to go back from first class to business class to coach. Because we should not and cannot anticipate that from now on we're going to go to Just explain, they're not What bothers them about the 6 ft is not COVID, it's the comfort. Of course you want to Yeah, you want to stretch it, yeah. Plus, we've also found, and we're working on it, our colleagues have also, that when you take away the distancing, guess what came back after a year of silence? Yeah, talking. The buzz, the hum of the talking, which is really, really sad. It was wonderful. When people are far, they can't talk, there's no one to talk to. But when they're sitting next to somebody, that hum, that buzz has returned. Let's go back to our comments. We have wonderful people who've been commenting. Our good friend of A lot of cheesecake comments, by the way. of cheesecakes. So, our good friend our newcomer, our avid listener, Joey's mom, who's going to be a guest on behind the Bema soon wonders how many flavors of cheesecake does Chef Gersh cook up in Boca for Shavuot. So Gersh responds, "Triple chocolate, chocolate Oreo crushed chocolate filling with white chocolate chips." Any cheesecake lovers out there? This might surprise our listeners. I'm not a huge eater and dairy and I I'm Ashkenazi do not get along well together. Yeah. Yeah, I guess I'm out of my Brody. You're you're vegan, right? Doesn't work and I know you're not a big fan of cheese so it's probably not going to Not a fan of show up but you're Jewish you stole Shavuot. Yeah. Yeah, we are. We are. But um you know, I'm I'm the Grinch who insists on the fleishigs even on Shavuot itself. I do have to give credit where credit is due especially if I want to place to sleep tonight. The name behind the Bema. We were thinking out loud in my home and I said behind behind the scenes were behind the something behind the something and my amazing wife the Rebbetzin said how about behind the Bema. So we do give her credit where credit is due on that topic. So Shavuot is going behind the Bema. Shavuot is is one example on conversion behind the Bema about Shavuot is the thinking the planning. Do we want to announce our theme? Should we do a breaking news and announce the theme at Boca Raton Synagogue over Shavuot? Does everyone know that for the last 15 seconds you guys were talking to each other saying let's we say the theme is No. What's the breaking news? You have the Moskowitz. Every year at Boca Raton Synagogue we do a theme. This year's theme is Torah and technology. What does that mean? That means a lot of things. It means Halacha, certain changes that are taking place in our day and age, Tushkofa, it's philosophy in terms of mindfulness and how do we disconnect to reconnect. All these types of topics are some that we are going to be speaking about over the holiday Shavuot. But we like to package it because we want people to come away from Shavuot not with a bunch of just disjointed classes, but we want people to feel like we conquered a topic that if you go to every class, you'll have a broad understanding of a certain subject. And so Torah technology is our subject this year. That's that's a great point and um and there's so many areas of it and we weave it into the Shiurim, the drashos at night, the morning, the afternoon, the classes. And right, like the goal is to feel you walk away having acquired not a comprehensive understanding of a topic, but and this is a broad one and we'll talk about Torah and technology, some of the new issues that COVID presented with technology, not only in Halacha technology, in Shabbos technology, in davening, but also in Hashkafa, in our mentality, in our attitude, in our personality, our challenge to mindfulness and the like. What are some of the past themes that we've done at Boca Raton Synagogue on Shavuos? I think our most successful one was one year we spoke about Mashiach and we tackled Mashiach from I think it was like 16 different avenues. And the nice part about that was because it was such a concentrated topic, you came away I don't know why everyone's laughing right now. What do you mean topics like what? Mashiach. Like what? No, so you came away at the end of Shavuot, I don't know what just happened. You came away at the end of Shavuot with a real comprehensive understanding of that topic, whether it was who is Mashiach, where do you find Mashiach, when's he going to come, was the Lubavitcher Rebbe Mashiach? There were some really um provocative topics there and people really felt that they had a grasp on the topic. So that was uh I think that was probably the most successful theme. And our and our mission that that Shavuot and every day is to bring Mashiach and every one of us should take responsibility. Mashiach is not here because of us and to do the best that we can to be the best that we Someone just woke up. Everybody needs to do the best they can and be the best they Rabbi Brody has schmutz on his face for the last like 2 years. yeah, you remember Rabbi Moskowitz about the one on Kabbalah? That was also excellent. I spoke Zohar that year. I spoke about the the noted be Huda and his opposition to the studying of Kabbalah. It was a That was a great year. Kabbalah. How young or how old do you have to be to study Kabbalah? We also attacked Kabbalah from a lot of different angles. My favorite theme, factor Shavuos. Where was that? Factor truth, truth or or fiction? Myth busters. Myth busters, yeah. That's the one I'm thinking of. We did myth busters. Like where is where is the ark? Where's the Aaron buried? That you could do again. I did Where was Gan Eden? You did with the Luchos, right? With the Where there really two Luchos? We took a bunch of myths surrounding Right, if you have a tattoo, can you be buried in a Jewish cemetery? We took a bunch of myths and we and we attacked it and we went through the theme of the the myth busters. Who can forget though Jay Keen's incredible efforts when he got the kids to write up their Divrei Torah? You remember he delivered them in front of the rabbis. Shall I tell you a beautiful beautiful story that came out? Jay, I know Jay's listening, so this is a tribute to Jay. We we Jay came up with this idea that kids would write Divrei Torah and then we would combine them to put them out in a book for the community to read, to learn, to have over Shavuos. It was beautiful. But then Jay had the idea we had another component where the educators, the heads of school, the rabbis of the community sat at this dais and kids who wanted to come to the front of the room give a Divrei Torah got a candy, a prize. They came in the afternoon. I did not I did not take him out by the I was going to say. They came in the afternoon one by one. And welcome back. That's the wrong week. They came in the afternoon one by one and and we gave them a prize. One One year there's a kid who who delivers a Divrei Torah and one of the heads of school turns to us and says, "Who Who's this kid? Who's this family?" So we tell him and say, "Where's this kid in school?" Said, "Public school." And that head of school, that rabbi, who might be the president of our school now, said, "That child does not belong in public No child belongs in public school, but this child, that Divrei Torah, that sincerity, that sweetness, we got to get this kid in Jewish school." And right after Shavuos met, figured out what the obstacles were, overcame them, overcame them, and it was just a beautiful beautiful story. So, check it out. girls Threw a lot of love for that one. ended up going. Yeah. One by one. Let's catch up on some of these comments that are coming in. First of all, we definitely should acknowledge that while we're talking about this Shavuos is so hard, and last year was so easy, we should not be at all um at all uh casual about that because we're grateful to have to plan a Shavuos. There are still communities that are locked down, shut down. They're still where we were last year, March, April, May. And so, you know, we can be extremely extremely grateful that we have a Shavuos to plan. So, we're not flippant or casual about that at all. We are super super grateful. Someone wants to know whether we still use the divider for learning at BRS. Uh in the Sefardic minyan, they do. In the Ashkenazi minyanim, they don't. In the outdoor minyan, they still do. Keep your questions coming. Do you think this is like an opportunity for a reset on the way we we see we learn all night on Shavuos? Like you started hearing year after year that there were communities where they would bring in uh you know, sushi stations, and they'd bring in the caterer, and this guy would have a whole, you know, carving station, and waffles. And Right. When I was growing up, JEC, there there was there was you didn't bring food. There was no food. You came and you you sat down and you learned. There was there were there weren't even drinks. I'm saying When I was first married, I and my in-laws live in a community where I spent a Shavuos, my first year married, and at the shul, I was like shocked. There were omelet stations and waffle bars, midnight barbecue. I was like I was like, is there any time to learn? Can we It's like, how do you compete with that? Yeah. We actually left out our most successful, I think our most successful program in all my years here on Shavuos, it was a teen program. Um when 13 Reasons Why first came out on Netflix, that was all the kids were talking about, and it there were a lot of questions the kids were asking and curious about. And Rabbi Gurevitch, you did a panel with a mental health professional in our community, our team rabbi, about 13 reasons why. And I think that might have been our most successful Shavuot 19 program in in recent memory. The teens The teens um packed that night. They were all really interested in it. Generated a lot of conversations. And I believe we got feedback later on that there was a teen there who heard that conversation and as a result reached out for help. And I don't want to be over melodramatic and describe that that panel saved their life, but had a big impact on getting the help they actually said it did. If If you remember, the email said that the person it's not true. I just said I don't want to be melodramatic. Okay. You can be I'll be melodramatic for you. We saved a person's life. Yeah. Wow, Jay Keen corrects me that that booklet on Shavuot actually was planned and produced with our dear dear friend Brian Galbut, Rabbi Dr. Boruch Twerski, Rabbi Brian Galbut. So, that was one of his brainchildren as well and and result of his vision, his effort. We miss him something terribly. We really really miss him, so. Torah marathon. Right? That Torah marathon, that's what it was called. That's right. That's right. Good old days. Yeah. Yeah. So, go behind the bima with with our listeners. We'll keep coming the comments, the questions, the conversations. We love it. You know, somebody texted me right before we came on, "Who'd you get? Who are the guests?" I said, "We got great guests." They said, "Who?" I said, "Us." We're going to We're going to talk. We're going to share. So, anyway, here we are and we're happy to We're happy to share some more. So, um we had a member call me last week and um made a very nice size donation, not connected to this conversation, but said they were thinking about that contribution and one way it might possibly be used. And they said, and this is not a This is an individual I admire who's on a total path of growth, phenomenal person. We're so glad that he and his family are in our community. But if I were to tell you that someone came to me wanting to promote a program for internet filters for devices of adults and kids, this is not the person who you'd probably predict or from the demographic religiously, even though that's an unfair stereotype, that you might predict. And yet he came to me and he said, "I've got X number of kids they're all over my house. Each one has a device. I have a device, and I've no idea what they're looking at, what they're doing, what they have access to." He said, "I have my IT people try to look at it. I've tried to look into it, and there's no good filter." So he said, "Here's this money, go find a way that we can offer a free license to every member of for them and their children to have something on their device, but something moderate." See, the challenge is there are filters which will make you not even be able to listen to Behind the Bima on your device, which is cruel and unusual punishment, and there are filters that do nothing. And then the biggest problem is that our kids are at least three steps ahead of us and know exactly how to undo and get around and, you know, disconnect the filters. So the question was how to get a filter. So I I was really moved by the person's desire to do this and commitment and generosity to help us make it possible, but also it was just a reminder that it's really, really important to do. Unfilled filtered unfettered access, adults, children, to what's out there, it's it's beyond There's nobody who's immune to the challenges that can be presented. So I think there It's It's It's a huge problem, and I think, you know, just to to hone in on that a little bit, I think part of the challenge is is specifically what you just said, which is that the kids are always ahead of the parents. I spoke to a parent last year, maybe 2 years ago, about this topic, about filters and internet, and he said to me he said, "You know, I give up." He said, "At a certain point" he happens to have a number of kids, upwards of seven kids, and he said to me he said, "There's just no possible way that I can keep track of seven, eight devices every single night wherever they're going." Don't forget, they're not just on my internet, they're going to friends' house. He goes, "There's simply no way between the television, the internet, the Netflix." He goes, "There's no way I can control everything." He said, "So, I'm throwing my hands up in the air and I'm just into education now." That was his thing. He said, "I'm discussing it openly with my kids. I'm telling them I'm not going to be able to beat you. I'm going to have to trust you and I'm going to have to empower you." You know, obviously that's challenging and you got to know your kids to be able to do that, but I empathized with the father. Right? He was He was genuinely frustrated with his inability to control and so he was going to plan B. I think the other challenge is is that so much of our kids' work, certainly in certain schools, is on the internet. So, they're always on computers. They're always on devices and they need those devices for school work, legitimately. And so, to be able to That makes it hard not only to filter, but it makes it hard to use it as a motivator. Meaning, you can't punish your kid and be, "I need your device." Cuz they're like, "Well, how am I supposed to do school?" Correct. Exactly. I won't do my school work. I won't study for my test. I won't Exactly. Exactly. So, creates an enormous challenge for parents and and I was actually talking to a group of dads last night about this and they all had a similar reaction, which is we try our hardest, we're failing miserably, and we don't really know what to do. So, we're hoping dad is struggling with it as well. You know, you figure it out for yourself and then try to figure out for your kids. It's the same same problem. This week's parsha Kedoshim to you. We live for holiness, not happiness. So, how can we You know what? I'll tell you the truth. This individual reached out to me. If if nothing else, of course we hope it will do much more, but if nothing else, if it generates a conversation in families, if it generates a conversation among parents, if it generates a conversation for us adults, for ourselves, to try to create some accountability to one another, to think about it, to at least become aware of and and, you know, recognize the the dangers and the challenges of it. For that alone, it is it is worth it. One of our listeners, Shimmy, asks, "How do we get our guests to come on the show? How do you convince them?" To which the answer is very simple. We don't have to convince them. They're so excited and eager to come on the show. And this is not like this the doors. Yeah, this is not empty PR rhetoric cuz I want you to rate and review and get the show listed higher. I'm not exaggerating. The rabbis will confirm. We get several emails a week of people who ask, who are offer, who are excited. Others who will reach out and say, "I think so and so would be a great guest. I would like you to put in touch." I got an email today from somebody who said, "So and so, a rebbe at the Mir in Yerushalayim, very prominent ram rosh yeshiva at the Mir in Yerushalayim would be an amazing guest behind the bema." I said, "They would be. I would love to have them. I can't imagine they'll come on." He said, "I have a relationship. I think I can get them. I'll make the introduction." So, we'd be thrilled. We'd love to have him on on the show. So, it doesn't take a lot of convincing to get our guests. They're excited because many of our guests let Should we go behind the bema about behind the bema for a minute? Yeah. What do you look for in a guest? Like what do people want to know always? Like Yes, let's go behind the bema about behind the bema. So, our guests, there are different buckets that they can fall in. Our guests, there are the religious inspiration guests, the rav, the rebbetzin, the the person, the scholar, the the righteous living that we're looking to them for that inspiration. There are the guests who are not observant, but who probably don't have an opportunity or a platform to talk about the kind of things last week. One of our our most popular episodes yet, what was his name? Oh, Bob Kraft. We had on Bob Kraft. We had on Bob Bob Kraft and grateful to Rabbi Schiner again for helping make that happen. Um I don't know how many venues or platforms Bob Kraft has to teach the Pirkei Avot shiur that he gave on Behind the Bima last week to talk about his Judaism and so on. So, we we know it was great to be able to have him on and and we've had If you actually go back and crunch the numbers of how many NFL owners, how many judges, how many billionaires, how many it's fascinating the the breakdown of of who we had on. Rosh yeshiva. We have other prominent guests who are lined up and scheduled and very very excited and eager to be able to have on. I will tell you this, we've mentioned it before and we'll mention it again. Behind the Bima does not pay one cent to the people who've come on our show. We fundamentally don't believe it's a good use of the community's money. It's not how we spend the money. Um so we've never paid a guest, not one penny. There are podcasts, there are shows that have dug deep into pockets. I'm sure they got sponsorship. There's no criticism or judgment of them for doing it. Everyone's making their own calculation how they do it. Behind the Bima doesn't spend a penny on guests. We're super grateful to all those who've come on and grateful to those who will be coming on. But we've had fascinating, fascinating personalities and we're looking forward to having the others. And if you have connections and uh and have recommendations, you know, again, we have many scheduled for the near future, but beyond, we'd love to talk to you about that as well. I find it Our ask is also different, right? Our ask is just give give us 5 minutes. Give us 5 minutes of your time. Wednesday night, won't keep you any longer. And then once they're on, 5 minutes becomes 20 minutes, 30 minutes. And once once they're on 5 minutes. The Jewish 5 minutes. That's the ask. That's the hook. Correct. Correct. That's how we do it. It's kind of like last week, so Bob Kraft was not available live, so you probably could tell by the sunlight coming in through his window at the time. Or he was in California. Yeah, exactly. That it was it was it was recorded beforehand. So I happened to have have not been in Boca and I was with my wife and I was like, I got to go somewhere. I'll be back in 5 minutes. I just got to take care of something. So But she's like, why do you need to take a microphone with you? Right. That's the ask. That's the ask of our guests and sometimes of other people around us as well. All what we do to bring Behind the Bima to you. And childhood heroes. And childhood heroes. And to make some people's dreams come true. But we do have we have the fantastic guests. We're grateful to them. We're grateful for their wisdom, their inspiration and that you help us share it and promote it even further. One of the things I loved about last week's guest, just to go back a little bit and I know we've spoken about it. I cannot tell you how many times I either got texts, emails, or stopped in shul the Shabbos by people who were inspired to start learning Pirkei Avos because of Bob Kraft. And to me, that's amazing. People said they were so almost like humbled by the fact that here you have this NFL owner speaking the words of our father, you know, ethics of our fathers behind Pirkei Avos off the top of his, you know, just like going back and they said they were embarrassed that they couldn't do the same thing. And so they said to themselves, you know what, if he could do it, I can do it, too. And so a number of people said that on last Shabbos, they committed themselves to learning Pirkei Avos with their family. Some the entire perek, some one mishnah each week. That's something they can discuss at their Shabbos table. But they said if Bob Kraft can do it, then we can do it, too. And to me, that's an amazing Behind the Bima story. I spoke to Bob, Bob's brother-in-law and sister right after the show. They called and they said they were watching. They were so, so happy with the way the interview went. So I said, why don't you start a weekly Pirkei Avos with Bob? Just do a weekly share. A weekly share. They loved it. They were on why on why you Torah. We also might start, we're we're we're toying with this. We'd love to hear your feedback. We're toying with starting a mailbag from the mailbag segment of the show. We get all kinds of emails, feedback, criticism, compliments, suggestions about the show. And that's just from our immediate family members. We get all kinds of Right, we get all kinds of feedback. So I want to share with you an email we got after last week's show because hopefully it will inspire you the way it inspired us. Dear Rabbis, Wednesday's show was really excellent. Bob Kraft, such a Yiddishe heart. Having lived in Boston for 38 years, I raised three children there. We all know of all the good things he did and are so proud of him. Not sure the rest of the world knows. Maybe now more people thanks to your show. His wife Myra, alav hashalom, was a tzadekes, she writes. In my 25 years as chesed committee chair in the community, Myra used to buy extra Shabbos food through so-and-so, the best caterer in the country. Best kosher caterer in the country. I should say his name if he is, Andrew Wiener. And he and I would distribute it to people in need. Yes, there were people in need in Newton. She ordered many a turkey and brisket meal, and we dropped it off to families who never asked for it or expected it. That's the kind of person she was. Everything is was done quietly without fanfare. She never knew to whom it was going, and the receivers never knew from whom it was coming, all to save face. Amazing people. Thank you for sharing it on your show. So, we get great mailbag, and and we'll share with you, by the way, the good, the bad, and the ugly, because the ones that rip us and criticize us, they're also kind of fun. I'll tell you something interesting about last week. right now? I'll tell you No, I'll I'll tell you an interesting experience I had last week. We're not getting into the details of it, but you know, we promote our our show, Behind the Bima is promoted by us or others on social media. So, let's just say on one of the social media platforms, the show was promoted, and somebody had some feedback about a particular guest or the wisdom of bringing them, or and so on. And there were some direct and harsh and judgmental comments. So, I really struggled. Should I answer? Should I get involved in the conversation? Should I respond? And then somebody told me, and it was so empowering. I can't I can't tell the two of you and to people listening strongly enough how empowering this is, and how much we have forgotten and forfeited the power that we have. Someone said to me, "Why would you engage, and why would you get in conversation? First of all, that attention is clearly all the person who wrote that wanted." Said, "Just delete the post. If you delete the post, all the comments go with it." And that's the most powerful thing you can do. It's your wall, it's your space, it's your home, it's your reflection, it's your wall. Delete the post. If you delete your post, all the comments that this person those people put there, they're gone with it. And I was like, "That's so brilliant." It's obvious and simple, and yet brilliant. I don't have to think, "How can I answer? How can I answer politically correct? Should I respond? How do I respond? Do I want to respond? Will it prolong?" I just press boop, delete, gone. And you know what? What's the person? They can't have a tit for tat, they can't have a complaint on you. It's my space. I'm entitled to delete it. You can't hang a poster on my door or my living room or my kitchen if I don't want it there. I can take it down. So, my wall is my space. If I want to delete it, I could delete it. And we sometimes I think forget that we have that power. And then you don't And you don't have to respond to everything as you've spoken about in the past that that's a struggle for you sometimes to you sometimes feel the need to respond to everything and then you come to realize that you don't have to and not everything requires a response, certainly certain emails. Right, you get that email and the like and and you feel the text message, you feel that everything you have to respond, but you don't need to. For sure, you don't need to. Right. Um another topic. Sefirah beards. Mhm. to give my wife credit, so I'm in good shape on that one, but I might go into the dog house now, but Sefirah beards. You like it, you hate it. Hate it. You love it. It just gets Itch. It gets itchy. It's not comfortable. I get people coming over to me saying, "You look more like a rabbi." Which is nice. Nice to hear that, but I can't wait to take it off. Let's say Let's put it this way. Both of you look eligible to learn Kabbalah. Kabbalah. I'm not there yet. I'm not there yet, but yes, it this way a little. Turn this way a little bit, Rabbi. It's not my favorite time of the year, but I guess that's the point. Who's got more white there? Near Rabbi Miller. Not my favorite time of the year. Turn to the left. Let's see. There it is. I love Sefirah beard. You love it. Not the neck part, not the itchy part, but I always am excited to to grow it in a little bit and it's not always You're going like full on yeshiva with it though. Like you're really You got it working there. Well, part of that's just Sefirah, but Part of it is cuz it's cuz it's white. Okay, exactly. That's definitely a big part of it. Definitely a big part of it, but I, you know, the old the old Sefirah beard. Um we've not been sponsored yet by a beard oil, but now that we're three rabbis with long beards coming in, don't underestimate the beard oil. Very, very important. Very important. Beard oil. This might be second to our trading recipes on the show. This might be second in the conversation. the skin under the beard, moisturizes the follicles, and it treats the the beard. And the longer your beard gets, the more important it is to use beard oil. You don't use beard You don't use beard oil? No. Is that in addition to shampoo? Okay, next topic. Yeah, I was going to say, move on. Move on. Go back to the mailbag. Four in one. We're going We're going to the mailbag. If anybody has a First of all, keep the comments and questions coming. We love it. We love your What do you want to hear? And if anybody wants to jump on, we'd love to have you. Yeah, the spin-off of our show behind feedback last week also for the behind the beard. Behind the beard. the Boston Bruins have a show like that, I think, behind the beard. Um anyways, I pop culture are very popular now. Like they're coming back. There's a whole world of Well, it's trending if you go to Yeah, I was I was in Israel. There's a whole part new new new group that that that wants to run for the Knesset. It's just the beard group. They're not working on the We have a member, actually. We have a member who comes from Crown Heights and started an entire campaign in Crown Heights about beards and hipsters, showing that the hipsters and the and the Chabadniks have a lot more in common than they realize, because they're both growing the beards. And he did a whole video. Um we should actually send the link out. It's a whole video. Do you remember what it was? When the hipsters came to Crown Heights, there was a lot of conflict. That's right. There was conflict. The hipsters were creating their bike lane right through the Chabadnikers, and it was a challenge. So, this amazing individual who's joined our community, what a bracha to us. There we go. Keora Labs is going to be sending Keora Labs. We will promote the beard oil. This is my beard hero right here. Talk about the beard hero here. We need it before we shave it off. And Keora Labs is my beard hero. I've I've been watching that beard for a long time. His and Rabbi Simon Jacobson. Keora Labs, amazing company that wins a lot of awards, not only for its products, but how it treats its staff and customers. We love you, Chaim. So, thank you thank you for that. What was I What were we talking about a second ago? Oh, the hipsters. Oh, the hipsters. No, so you remember what he called it? He made a great logo of a beard and he and he called the program unite the beards and he made like a great night with beer where Chabad guys and hipsters and Crown Heights got together for unite the beards in order to bring a sense of unity together. It was just a brilliant brilliant view, a brilliant brilliant idea and you and he ran with it. So, um How much How is your sleep, guys? How much are you sleeping these days? Uh I just started going back to the gym, so now it's it's it's a lot less. Gym you why I'm asking. 5:30 that question come from? I'll tell you why. I'll tell you why. Article in Article in the New York Times yesterday. I don't like to mention that newspaper by name, but article in a national newspaper yesterday whose title is sleeping too little in middle age may increase dementia. First of all, this is a classic This is a classic I was reading it. Tell you how tired I am. You're reading it 4:00 in the morning. No, I was reading it sleeping too little in the Middle Ages. Like, what do we care about how well they slept in the Middle Ages? Cuz By the way, the only person who would read it that way is like somebody who learns Rishonim. Somebody who has to say all the Meforshim, you know, our commentators from the Middle Ages. Who else would read in 2021 a headline middle So, the sleeping too little in not the Middle Ages, but sleeping too little in middle age may increase dementia risk study finds. Research tracking thousands of people from age 50 on, of which none of us are there, suggests that those who sleep 6 hours or less a night are more likely to develop dementia in their late 70s. Oh, it's terrible. sleep 6 hours or less a night from the age of 50, you're more likely to develop dementia in your 70s. That scared me. That has say something? I have to wake up in 6 hours and 9 minutes, so I got 9 minutes left. Why Why do you wake up so early? I got to go to the gym. What time do you wake up? Actually, it's 5:00 a.m., so is my math off? Yes. 7 hours. Yeah. No, but I will tell you I believe it cuz when I was training for the Boston Marathon last year, which I did not run unfortunately, one of the things that my coach told me and really drilled into me early on is he said if you don't get enough sleep, I promise you you will get injured and you will flame out. He said I promise you. I said ah, I don't need sleep. I'm fine, you know, when you're in your Shiva, it's like a sign of being macho to get as little sleep as possible. Well, the first couple days running, I was going through my night regular schedule and I couldn't function. And my body wasn't recovering well and I came back to the coach and he said, "Yeah, exactly." He says, "Your body needs the sleep in order to recover." And he says, "The less you give that time to your body to recover, you're not going to be as successful." So, I believe it. You know, again in your Shiva, getting little sleep is a sign of honor. It's a badge of honor. And not all of us get as much sleep as we should, but it's something to aspire to. I agree with that and I think that we need to change that culture. I'm guilty myself of it and of not owning this issue. Um but we do, we have this culture of of the business syndrome. So busy, crazy busy. I don't sleep. How little do you sleep? How much do you sleep? You know, but the most impressive people we probably know probably do get enough sleep because they've prioritized that and they've scheduled their life around it. So, I don't think it means they're sleeping in 11:00 a.m. or they're sleeping, you know, for a nap in the afternoon necessarily, but it means they've prioritized. They know the sleep they need to operate. They need the minimum and they know how they can make it up. I will tell you that I won't say balancing out this article, but there was an article on a scientific study that said that you can make up sleep on the weekends, which I loved how that study fits perfectly for Shabbos. Shabbos. It said if you're sleep deprived during the week, because people will tell you, "No, you can't make it up. You need it every night. You can't ever make it up." This study said that you can make it up on the weekends and that is shaina b'shabbos ooh ah, sleep on Shabbos. It is the best, but sleep is important. Do you find that as you got older, you don't need as much sleep and as you can't sleep late? Like I remember back in the day you could sleep on a thing you know Well, you can or but I am I'm definitely without a doubt more productive and I more important than that I'm more creative if I get enough sleep. Mornings where I don't get enough sleep, I can function, I can go through the day, I can go through the motions, but in terms of me being as as as productive as possible and more importantly me being as creative as possible, sleep definitely helps that. Listen, I was reading Yeah, sorry. No, no, we we've designed chemically these band-aids that don't even that mask and don't make us realize how much we need sleep. So, whether it's coffee or whether it's you know, caffeine pills or Monster drink or 3-hour energy, 5-hour energy, however many hours energy. So, you know, so we basically we feel a little sluggish, we drink another coffee. Jeffrey asked me today I walked into the office it was like 4:00 and I was making another one of the coffees in the Keurig. He says, "How many of those do you have a day?" Right. Like four or five. Do you really? Yeah. That's a lot. Wow. It's black also. No no milk, no sugar. So, I drink one coffee in the morning. I have one coffee in the morning, one caffeine in the afternoon. But what I did is I'm so tired all the time because this is an area I need a lot of work. So, I I just I used to have like an 8-oz cup. I got 16 I got these huge cups. wondering why you got those. I bought these huge cups because psychologically I still feel like I have one cup in the morning, one cup in the afternoon. My cup happens to be twice the size the cup used to be. It's still one in the morning, still one in the morning, one in the afternoon. Yeah, wait till next year. It's going to be a bucket. Yeah. cup. It happens to It happens to be a great example of we recognize in our lives areas that we need discipline, eating, speaking, what we look at. Sometimes we don't think of sleep as a discipline. It's like I go to sleep when I can and I wake up when I have to and it's just not an area that I have control over or that I or that I need to be disciplined. But But study jarred me, it really jumped out at me because it was one of those classic examples of yeah, run yourself ragged in your youth when you think you got it, but the study says you're going to pay you're going to pay for it one day. Dementia is terrible. Again, just to to to push back on the utopia of you and I going to sleep at 9:00 at night, the challenge is it's not feasible. And I've tried it. But when you have children in the house who have homework, who have responsibilities, by the time your kids I don't even go to sleep anymore, but the time they don't need you anymore, it's 10:00 at night, 10:30 at night, 11:00 at night. You and I are doing a lot of teaching at night, sometimes to 10:00, to 10:30. It's very hard to finish teaching. Last night I finished teaching at 10:15. It's very hard to finish teaching at 10:15 and being asleep by 10:16. You're wound up, the adrenaline is rushing. Agreed, but let's say but let's say yeah, but let's say you made the commitment, a commitment you make to yourself, which I think are the commitments that we violate the most. Right? In our time management, our exercise, our eating, our prioritizing our own learning. It's easy The commitments we'll make to others we really feel. I'll tell you what, my dear friend Rabbi Yaakov Glasser, um who heroically donated his kidney to his father. This is an amazing story. He used it in drasha in his shul. I'm not stealing it from him, I'm borrowing it from him. So, Rabbi Yaakov Glasser donated his kidney to his father. A great, great story. A great, great, great, great people, he and his father. So, before he could donate his kidney, he had to get in shape. He had a nutritionist, he had a health expert, someone guiding him, getting him in shape, taking good care of him. So, he did it and he got himself into the shape he needed to be. Surgery happened, donated his kidney. Thank God his father's doing well, he's doing well. So, the nutritionist, this health expert calls him a few months later and says we need to make an appointment. He's like, why? She said I need to see you. So, he comes and sees her and um and basically reviews, how are you doing? I need to weigh you, I need to see how you're doing. He's like, what what's the problem? Like, you you gave me great habits when I needed to get in shape in order to donate the kidney to my father. I'm good. She said, you don't understand. Listen to this. Listen to this insight. She said, you don't understand. When you were doing it for your father, I'm confident you would stay with it. But now that it's for yourself, I'm worried you're going to let it go. So when we do for others, it's sometimes much easier to be disciplined. But when it comes to the promises we make ourselves or the things we're doing for ourselves, it's easy to be like, "Ah, I'll sleep more. Ah, I'll eat better. This I'll start diet tomorrow. I'll learn a little bit extra on this end." So we burn the candle on both ends. We totally neglect ourselves. And I think this is that, you know, it is an area that needs that discipline and it's a harsh reminder that we will pay for it one day if we don't if we don't take care of it when we're young. So that's why the Rambam said 8 hours. Jeff Bezos apparently said 8 hours. You got to get 8 hours of sleep. We should be a badge of honor and a point of pride. 4:00 every morning. Bob Iger, former CEO of Disney. goes to sleep 4:00 every afternoon. Right. Doubtful, but okay. What time does he go to sleep? I I didn't ask him. It wasn't in It wasn't that part wasn't in the autobiography. Great autobiography though. If anyone wants a really motivational, inspiring story, Bob Iger's autobiography, The Disney Story. Mhm, interesting. Would you believe that we're almost out of time? What are the books you guys reading? What are you guys reading these days? I see Rabbi Brody's got his book shelf right I'll tell you what I'm reading. I'll tell you what I'm reading. David Mueller's Houdini book and David Mueller's book about being in the mosque, The Jew in the mosque, the distributor of halal meat. And he posts week after sponsoring the show I'm still getting calls from all over the world. I heard about your book of mine in the Bima. Some very renowned people. So we highly recommend that book again. It's worth it. So you should read that book while you're putting in your beard oil from Keora Labs. While with a big thank you to the Strauses. You too. While you're booking Lenny Friedman for a musical concert after booking Lenny Friedman and while wherever you are you're getting to know a Shryer somewhere. A new question we have from one of our listeners as we are rounding out our show to guests. Who needs guests? While we're rounding out our show tonight being It's a It's a little fun with I'm saying it's fun when we get into it a little bit. Yeah. Isaac wants to know any tips. Any tips for someone going to Israel for the year next year? Ooh. Any tips? most of it. Do you want me to go first? Yeah, go ahead. What's your tip? Know yourself, and I really mean that. I think there's so much peer pressure in Yeshiva to act a certain way, behave a certain way, um jump skip um jump steps that you might not be ready to jump just to be able to fit in. I think one of the most important things I realize now in perspective is how important it is to know yourself. Every one of us is unique. Every one of us is different. Every one of us has different talents. Just because someone might be great at learning Gemara doesn't mean that you can't find your own place in learning Gemara, or maybe your place in learning Machshava, or learning Chassidus, or learning Mussar. But, I think you really have to know yourself, and everything else goes forth from there. What you're going to learn, the type of person you're going to become, it all comes from you. It can't be dictated because someone else tells you to be a certain way. Well said. Well said. I'll say something that's probably very radical, and I don't think that anyone's probably going to listen to me on this one, but don't bring your phone. Don't bring your smartphone. Like, if you need a phone, like we figured out how to go a whole year. We spoke to our parents once or twice of you know a a year maybe. At least what I did. I don't know if What was that game, Snake? As long as you had Snake on your phone. You take advantage. You'll be You'll be lost in the learning. You'll just enjoy the year. You don't You get one year off. Leave it at home. Immerse yourself. Immerse yourself. You can't be 100% immersed if you've got that phone buzzing every 2 seconds. You can't. I'll give you a third piece of advice, which is get the most out of your year. I think even more now than when we were there, there are really comfortable, convenient places to stay. Some people's parents have apartments, and uncle, their cousins have a American style home. So, you just stay in Yeshiva or seminary, or you go to whoever has the best shower, and the best bed, and the best food. But, you're missing out on the on the Chavaya, the go around Israel. You're missing out on those weekends which will transform and change your life. Go and explore the rich tapestry of the Jewish people. Go to places you'd never go. Go to Bat Ayin for Shabbos and Chevron. Go to Bnei Brak for Shabbos and go to Tzfat. Go to here, go to there. People, the the Rebbes and the teachers and the Morahs and the and the Yeshivas and Seminaries, they're amazing. But they're also extraordinary people all over Israel. Find their classes, get experiences, develop those relationships. Take advantage. Totally take advantage because too many people take the easy way out. They never leave. The whole year is over. They never really went to where they wanted to go for Shabbos. It's those Shabboses, the informal experiences, which will change you forever. So, go with a plan. Go with a list of what you want to do. Go make it happen. My daughter, I'll tell you a future guest on Behind the Bima, my daughter is in Israel for the year. Called this week. She called Rabbi Benji Levine, Rabbi Ari Levine's grandson. He's been to Bnei Brak for Shabbos. So, one of my other daughters went there for Shabbos. She left me a voicemail. She was like on fire just from She left a voicemail. She just said, "My name is Liora Goldberg. I'm from Boca. You know my parents." He said, "Hi your parents at the shul in Boca and your grandparents and your sister." You know what he said? He's such a tzaddik. He goes He goes, "It's April. How come it took almost the whole year for you to call to ask to come for Shabbos?" Rabbi Ari Rabbi Ari Levine, a tzaddik in our times grandson, right, grew up in America. Great great person. We're going to bring him on Behind the Bima. So, my kids go to Israel with a list they've got to experience. They already went to Sha'ar Ayin for Shabbos. And you know, the the the experiences all over Israel, those are the things that Your teachers are amazing and learning Torah is amazing, but the people, the people of Israel and the experience of Israel, pss, nothing compares. Really really amazing. Really really amazing. So, with that, gentlemen, we're an hour in and end here. It's been a great show. I would say this is Behind the Bima on Behind the Bima. Behind the Bima of Behind the Bima? Of Behind the Bima. We're behind the Behind the Bima. Behind Behind the Bima. That's a good title. So, when the show gets posted, Matthew, let's call it behind behind the Bima. Want to thank our listeners and the people who have commented, asked questions, and uh want to thank all those who take a moment to inconvenience yourself. Take a moment. Open your podcast player and rate review. Everyone right now, we'll shoot right up to number one. Everyone take a moment while we're on the air. No, take a moment. Take a moment to subscribe on YouTube. Be notified in real time every time we go live with a learning opportunity. Grateful again to the Strauses for sponsoring and thank all of you and tell you until next time. Stay happy, stay healthy, and stay home.