(115): Feeling Grateful and Finding the Source

good morning I want to thank R and Jeff Bal who have been sponsoring this month of our living with amuna in memory of her beloved grandmother thank you for the sponsorship through this month if you'd like to sponsor the series for the year or future classes please feel free to speak to uh Matthew Linda or Lee anyone in the office we are continuing and hopefully finishing today the v b this current essay we're learning in R the idea that we're only if we're living with Amun we spoke about that in the a little bit yesterday the in every almost every we use the language of that if we want to really be alive not only measured physiologically anatomically not only to be alive with a pulse not only to be alive with a respiratory um our respiratory system working but to really be alive which is to be fulfilling the purpose of life to be alive is not just to have a pulse to be alive is to fulfill the reason that we're here and for our life to be shaped and molded by Torah and mitzvos to find meaning and purpose and fulfillment is to be pursuing our mission in this world the mission of self-actualization self- perfection to realize our potential and to understand why we're here what we're meant to accomplish and then to go out and to go and do it so how do we do that with if you think there is no God you live a life where it's all about you and that the moment life ends that's it there's no afterlife there's nowhere to go from there that our memory and our influence and our impact ceases and ends all there is is the here and now I can't imagine such a life I can't imagine such a life but rather we we find life our life is informed and inspired by the idea of it's through our amuna that we're alive which also means that when we confront challenges and hardship and suffering when we have financial crisis when we have a crisis in our relationships when we're concerned and we're losing faith about our children's future when we are worried about health how do we find life how do we find a will to live how do we find strength and support it's through am that we live when we lean on and lean into AEM that's when we have the Serenity and that's when we have the peace of mind to know that whatever we're going through somehow somehow it makes sense and somehow it's for a reason so we're on the top of page Z we are towards the end of this essay of R and we last left off and he was talking about that when a person wants to increase or promote their amuna we want to live with more faith we've been talking about over and over that faith is not a philosophy faith is not an ideology faith is not a course you take or evidence that you evaluate or proof that you examine faith is a maida it's a quality it's a character trait faith is a muscle when you use it it grows and it expands and it's healthy and if you ignore it and neglect it it atrophies and it dies so if when you're confronted with moments of worry of fear of Envy of anger and you catch yourself and you stop yourself and you say you know I don't know what I'm worried about I don't know why I'm angry I don't know what I'm envious of everything is from Hashem there's a reason there's a plan it's happening both in the bad times and the good times you're able to say thank you and live with joy we'll talk about that this morning this notion of finding Hashem in the good times and giving him credit then as well but a person who lives with that amuna so in order to achieve such a lifestyle it's not enough to set out with the goal I want to live with auna I'm going to have faith in my life I'm going to see Hashem in everything I'm going to see Hashem in everything you have to also know what are the obstacles what are the pitfalls what are the challenges where do I go wrong if I don't get enough sleep and I'm on edge and I'm tired and I'm anxious it's hard for me to remember that there's a plan and that Hashem is in charge if I don't eat right it's hard for me to remember if I'm around certain people or if I around certain circumstances brings out the worst in me not the best in me so it's not enough says RBA to identify what is the life I want to live and this is true not just about Amun identifies this about every quality and about every every um positive attribute in life that it's not enough to just identify and say that's how I want to live one also has to say what are the pitfalls what's going to knock me off course what's going to get me in trouble I'm I'm probably not speaking to the biggest group of golfers here but for anyone who plays go when you stand on the tea you say well there's the hole and I want my little ball to go home to that little hole so you can either just take a driver your biggest club and grip it and rip it and try to get it there you could end up in the lake you can end up in the sand you could end up in the woods you could end up in the or you put course management which says well let's see that's where I want to go that's the green there's the hole here's my little balll I want it to go home in the hole but trying to get it there there's a bunch of sand traps there's a bunch of water there's some rough there's so you know what here's how I take them out of Play here's how I'm going to manage this hole I'm going to use this club I'm going to aim for this distance I'm going to swing this way so that's a metaphor that maybe you don't appreciate but a metaphor for life but a metaphor for life that there are people in life who have the griet and riet mentality they wake up every day and they grip it and rip it and that's just me I live life and I'm boisterous and I go for it and you know what you fall flat on their face fall flat on their face with the Yahara given to anger and given to envy and sabotage relationship ships and Destroy happiness and well-being and ruin one's own health because they're just gripping and ripping it or you could live life and say okay here's the hole here's who I want to be here are a lot of obstacles on the way here the sand traps and the water and the rough in my life and here's how I'm going to navigate around them I know when I'm around these people it makes me feel this way I'm therefore going to be careful I know that when I do this it does this so that's what the in calls mindfulness vigilance caution and that precedes zus first you have to know what's going to going to knock me off course and then you could say how am I going to get to my goal but if all you want to do in life is pursue your goals and you don't keep in mind what's going to knock you off course you'll never get there you'll never get there eating is a very simple example you wake up and you say it's not a diet it's a lifestyle change I'm never eating that garbage again carbs and cake and potato chips and I'm done I'm never eating it again and then what happens you're invited to the Sim and you skipped breakfast and you ski lunch and you're starving and you get to the schorg and you say you know and really eat much today it's okay I can have this and that and the other thing why because you went into a situation you didn't say you know whenever I go to a wedding and I'm hungry whenever I go shopping and I haven't eaten lunch first I buy junk and garbage and terrible stuff so you have to know what are the pitfalls what's going to hold you back and how do you navigate around them so Rola says one of these areas maybe more than any when it comes to amuna the biggest obstacle that's going to challenge that's going to get in our way is GAA arrogance arrogance when we put our ourselves our ego our self-centeredness our honor when it comes first there's not enough room for us and God not enough room for us and God and if a person wants to find Hashem in their lives wants to live with amuna and get all the benefits of living with amuna emotional health physical health spiritual health peace Serenity relationships improved enormous benefits but if you want it it means sublimating your ego it means checking your ego at the door it's actually this week's para where the Torah tells us that when we conquer ER we have to purge the a of the idolatry some of the and it says don't ever bring the idolatry into your home and some of the commentary say the idolatry that we're enjoined not to bring into our home is a sense of arrogance if you walk through that front door with an attitude of arrogance my way of the highway the way I see it everyone's got to fall in line I'm the authority I'm the dictator in this home it's what I want all the time then you're not going to have peace in your home you're not going to have meaningful relationships and therefore you're not going to have health or happiness person has to check their ego at the door if they want any relationship in life certainly if one wants a relationship with Hashem you got to get rid of the GAA so that permeates all of our Jewish living it reinforces an attitude of humility to say of course I take a pride in who I am and I'm trying to be the best person I can be but it's not always about me it's not always about me I make room for Hashem when the top of in our daving in the Shimon that we recite we bow and why are we bowing we're loosening our hamstrings we're stretching we're doing some calisthetics no that's just a side benefit why are we Bowing in daving because through that posture and through that gesture we are communicating not to anyone other than ourselves a sense of we which means we're living with a sense of humility we're subjugating we're sublimating we are submitting ourselves so here's the proper way to Bow people don't bow properly the tells us how it's recorded in the sometimes we bow first with our knees than the waist other times we bow at the waist but you know too many people are not bowing correctly the is that you bow at bar and at Hashem you straighten up when you say hashem's name God's name when we think about with awe and reverence Hashem his power his his omnipotence a person has to stand direct you have to stand with honor and with dignity opposite Hashem so you bow when you bend at the knees at the waist and you stand up the gamar says like a snake first your head comes up and then the rest of your back so too many people don't fully bow they don't come up correctly you go very fast they don't go slowly they're they're bowing throughout the whole thing there's a proper and there's a reason and listen to what RBA says it's such a beautiful imagery never say sh the same way again because this imagery is so powerful one of the that we say in the morning one of the 15 uh blessings that start our day which is a series of expressing gratitude an attitude of gratitude to S our day you can go back and listen to the sitter Snippets we did on them on the so one of those bras is what does that mean z means to make upright and means those who are bent over and when we say this BR we mean it both literally and figuratively there are people who have physical ailments they're bent over they're hunched over they're struggling to stand upright physically it's difficult it's painful it's hard to walk and they're not mobile and it's hard to get anywhere and we say Hashem has the ability to make the person who's in pain or hunched over to be able to make them upright but it also means metaphysically there are people who emotionally are bent over emotionally are hunched over emotionally are on the verge of collapse but he takes the person who's emotionally broken and emotionally collapsing and he's Z he lifts that person up and they stand upright so every time we bow we at but we stand up at hem why to remember I bow and I saym I'm nothing I'm garnished with humility and with Brokenness I'm unworthy I'm inadequate I'm garnished I'm nothing I'm nothing and then we remember you know I'm not nothing I'm a prince or a princess I'm a child of Hashem he believes in me I'm aim if I'm here then I am worthy and I have something to accomplish and who lifts me up and who supports me and who gives me the confidence to put one foot in front of the other and no matter what I'm struggling with no matter what I'm confronting no matter what I'm suffering with no matter what I just endured that I can persevere and stand upright again it's it's he makes us stand upright without the help of Hashem we cannot do it we cannot do it I just visited someone another not immediately a member of our community related to a member of our community that I know for a very very long time I was in Yesa with another young person who's suffering terribly terribly terribly terribly so undeserving and who are we to say that to Hashem I'll say it to hasem I know it and it's undeserving and we don't understand the ways of Hashem and he is suffering terribly he's such a sad and the the anguish the pain the the suffering of the treatment that he's going through unfortunately the condition that he's in but his amuna like others that we know and love and loved was is incredibly strong so he said to me you know this is a I don't understand why hasem is it's a I don't understand it but he says to me with no energy and and totally weak and weakened you know we say in our daving go there that hasem sometimes goes there and we don't understand why he's goes there where he's goes there he's goes there for us to lose all our money or lose our house or lose our job he's goeser for us to not have from our children he's goer from us to have a Health Challenge he's goeser for us for our relationship to to Des we don't understand why he's goes there but he's also M after he's goes there after for whatever reason that we don't understand we had to confront somea some challenge he's MIM he still gives us the wherewithal he strengthens us to persevere and endure and somehow face whatever we're facing and somehow be able to break through so what is ding says R it is an exercise in humility when I dve in what I say is you know I'm going out to the boardroom and I'm going out to the court and I'm going going out to the surgery center and I'm going out to wherever I do my business and however I make my living and when I'm there I'm going to bring an attitude that it all depends on me I'm going to try to kill it in business I'm going to give it my all and I'm going to work hard as if it all depends on me but when I walk into that Ding three times a day I bow and I say asem I'm garnished without you you're the one who guides my hand or you guide my mouth or you guide my feet or you guide my brain and my heart and whatever I choose to invest in and work hard on whatever I do its success is utterly dependent on on you and that's the middle 13 of our bras the first three we understand who hashm is and the difference between us and him and the last three is our gratitude which we're going to get to momentarily but those middle 13 our rabbis the unshaken they identified for all time and in all places and perpetuity they identified 13 things that universally we all need and what are they we need wisdom and we need health and we need livelihood and we need Justice and we need Redemption and thenu whatever they didn't identify and whatever they didn't write a br for no problem put it Inu they didn't think of something in the first 12 put it Inu but they created a template every Jew universally speaks to what we need and three times a day says R we come before hasem and we bow we literally bow in the amida and the whole you know the rambam writes there are people who have the minut to Shuckle and that's perfectly okay some people get into a rhythm that's how they find kavana that's what they do is they chuckle but the Raam says that's not the posture of ding the posture of daving is to actually stand still to be your head looking towards the ground and and hunched over a little not hunched over is a negative connotation but to be bent bent over a little bit your right hand on top of your left hand over your heart and that's the way to Daven because if you came before someone from whom you needed extraordinary help you came before the manager of the bank that you really need that loan the Doctor Who You're begging to give you an appointment or to do that that surgery you come with a little bent over your hand and over your heart and you say please I'm humbled I'm nothing I need you I'm dependent on you I can't do it without you and the r writes that's the posture of not wildly gting and shuckling and screaming and you know that's not the posture again I'm not being critical of it but for the ram that's not the posture of the posture of is your right hand over your left hand over your heart and a little bit bowed over with a sense of humility and submission Hashem yeah when I walk into the boardroom oh I arch my back and I stand UPR right and my chin is high and I walk in and I demand respect and I'm going to negotiate a deal and I'm going to kill it in business when I walk into the operating room I have confidence when I walk into that courtroom I have confidence but you know when I come before Hashem I'm like a little child I'm bent over I say Mommy Daddy please I need your help I can't do it without you that's the posture so the amid three times a day we start our day with humility the in the middle of the day we stop and we say whoa I thought I can control things I'm manipulating things I thought I'm in charge stop I'm a gornish I need you I can't do it without you please help me and we end our with the same thing and he writes saysa this is really important to teach young people that the daving is not just lip service you're not just putting a check next to the fact that you davened but daving is an exercise in humility in submission in a statement that I am dependent young people want to feel independent I don't need nobody I don't need nothing I'm independent I can do it by the way Mom and Dad can I have the credit card and some cash and can you pay for everything in my life and you know and so on and so forth so uh okay we won't go there but anyway so young children particularly today want to feel independent and pride I don't need anyone and I have a DEA I have an opinion on everything and no one should tell me what to do who I am or who I'm going to be we need to remember no you got to bend over and with humility lean in and say Hashem I'm nothing without you where do you see this most not in those 13 middle BR where do we down at the end of the with what is is it is to it is gratitude modm is at the end of the the three bras of gratitude and we bow at God we are grateful to you it's a spotless I am nullifying myself and I realize that you know what I got a good result from the doctor I got a good result in my investment I had moment for my child I'm blessed to be alive today it's not because of me it's only because of you it's only because of you it's spotless we are grateful to God how through submission to him through submission to him you know what kind of a thank you would it be to you you know if you if you did something for someone imagine you saved someone's life or you bailed them out or they were only able to survive because of you and they come and they say you know really I'm the one who saved my life but thank you for what ever you know what kind of gratitude would that be it's the person who who comes to you with some sense of humility and says I could not have gotten through that without you the deepest most profound sense of gratitude is the person who really realizes they couldn't have gotten through without you and that's how we show and we should pay special attention when we say these words at the end of ding for our lives which are given over to you in your hand in your hand we're up to Ash and S Snippets and what makes as so special wow tongue twister what makes as so special thear says is it includes the sentence you open your hand it's the same word naturally a person wants to think I made I'm a self-made man I'm a self-made woman I'm the one who went through this education and took on this career and built this family I'm the one who works out every day and eats this healthy lifestyle who I am what I look like how I think what I've achieved my bank account portfolio it's me that's the natural temptation but a person who contemplates and thinks about it will feel and realize you know my whole life and everything in it is it's given over to Hash you know when you think that you know when you feel that when something's missing that's true when you tear your Achilles and you can't make it across a room you can't carry a cup of coffee a person has a catheter they can't the simple most Base Animal Act of relieving yourself you can't do in a healthy way when a person when a person loses a certain faculty a memory starts to go or that of someone around us that we love we realize my life is in your hands how many brilliant accomplished it's one of the most tragic things are is dementia Alzheimer's loss that we're seeing in our in our time it's so tragic a person is they're a broken vessel this individual who knew sh was a rashash Shiva and spoke to thousands this individual who was an executive and managed and Brilliant and accomplished this individual who was a balos and love their family and now they they don't even know their own name they're a broken vessel it's the saddest thing it's the saddest thing in the world so when we encounter that there's two reactions we can have of course we should feel pity and r us and of course we feel bewilderment and wonder why we don't understand it but one of the feelings and reactions we also should have is wow am I lucky my life is given over to God and I shouldn't take it for granted not for one moment if we have parents if we have people around us who are of an age that their their memory is still working it's still faculties are still functioning they're able to live that's not a given there's nothing that's a given it's for our lives that are that are given over to you the Miracles that are with us every day and the Wonders and your goodness in every momenta Miracles Miracles and wonders at every moment what are you talking about where are the Miracles where are the Wonders I woke up I went to work I worked out I went to my 17 doctor's appointments I took my 14 medicines I went to sleep I survived the day where's the where are the Miracles every moment what are you talking about so says Raa you know what our job is our job is every day to live a reflective life where every day I'm looking for and seeing and saying thank you for the Miracles that are involved in our life every single day every single day every single day the Miracles I had to drive home from a meeting last night in near Aventura and I was extremely exhausted and nobody give me feedback and worry about me and tell me any more sleep I know it I was exhausted let's just say there were a couple moments driving home that could have gone a very different way because I was really tired and falling asleep and maybe even more and I I came home with the big it's m a miracle it was irresponsible I should pull her sleep I got it it's a good thing is not here please don't tell her but I'm just saying I'm just telling you that so you could say like wow thank God I was able to I survived I I didn't fall asleep at the wheel and I made it home alive or you could say that's a moment in a day that was filled with countless moments that is filled with your goodness your kindness and your Miracles and that happens in our day in a million and one different directions that could go different ways the near miss with the car the person who went through the yellow light it happened with the forget the miracle like life and death I'm giving extreme examples of life and death I'm not talking about extreme examples of life and death I'm talking about by the way if you driving a car that's a nice forget the fact that maybe you have a self-driving car that's like a super nice I'm saying we're living like George Jetson's you know like the things that we watched as kids is no longer the future that's now like the old past that's the you ever been to Disney or Epcot one of them has that whole wheel of the future what's that thing called Carousel of prog Carousel of Progress which there's still like the Carousel of Progress is still depicting a time in like 400 years where you'll be able to speak to someone and see their picture at the same time on a TV the Carousel of regress it's the Carousel of like 25 years ago it's time to upgrade that that ride so so I'm saying well we once went on rides and we were like no way I think they have in there where you could turn your oven on like digitally so I'm telling you can now in the in the sh I give on Sunday mornings we're learning about someone said you know on my phone I have an app I could turn the oven on so if I am halfway around the world and I turn my oven on but the N puts the food in is that Bish is whoever thought like the address that question you're in Singapore you're in China you're in India you're around the world you're in south of south of Africa Australia but on your app you set the oven to 350 and then the housekeeper puts the food in is that we're living in what okay so we're living we're we're living we're living in miraculous Supernatural times insane times someone just told me about a project that they developed uh in in of us in Florida big apartment buildings and they built on the rooftop they built cuz they understood we're going to have it now they built on the roof not a Landing Pad but like a little runway for flying cars because if you're building a building today in 2019 you have to build that building because soon there's going to be flying cars so your Tesla won't only drive you where you told it to take you then it will park you on the rooftop and you can circumvent all the traffic why am I again I'm telling you that today's what what is ordinary today today is yesterday's Miracle so you could live life and say ah it's ordinary it's gornish it's nothing or you live life and you say these are Miracles it's insane such a recognition identifying I survived a drive on 95 by the way if I were Wide Awake it's a miracle to survive a drive on 95 let alone you're falling asleep it is an enormous step enormous step in the pursuit of living with amuna is living a reflective life a mindful life where you see the goodness and the kindness and the daily Miracles and you say wow Hashem that's unbelievable that you made a carig machine and I have instant real coffee and that's a what a miracle every cup of coffee is a miracle it's a miracle these little small seemingly insignificant and ordinary are truly extraordinary and if we live life not in black and white not in color but in high definition the good it's in every moment all around us and at all times it's unbelievable so in this of that we bow modem I'm bowing to you imagine if I really were saying thank you for all the things that I have every day my three amas a day would take me the entire day if the modm was and the cell phone and thank you for the car and thank you for this miracle thank you for the hearing aid and thank you for the this A Mir the Miracles the light indoor plumbing air conditioning thank you you know when you appreciate the air conditioning when the power goes out you know when you appreciate the indoor plumbing in the hurricane when there's no water you fill your bathtub wow it's a miracle don't tell me it's not a miracle you now you know it's a miracle if I told you go design a world with indoor plumbing like why does the water run down how does it work how does it come up and out of the sink and the hot and the cold it's a miracle I understand there's engineers and I understand we can't explain it all but that we are designed to be able to create that we're engine to engineer this world and this life how blessed and fortunate are we that we're living this 21st century and that we not living a thousand or 2,000 or 500 years ago we wouldn't have known better of course but we can appreciate it doesn't take a horse and buggy and seven weeks to get from here to the beach you know how blessed are weom these are two sides of one coin the Great said about the the following vort I know it's we're still in the month of but I'll give you we say in the we are therefore obligated to say thank you for the one who did for our forefathers all of these Miracles that's the that we say before the second cup in the we say this therefore this is the that goes into this therefore we have to thank you who are are we thanking here's a hint R bolded the word for us for the one who did these Miracles what's with the mystery all of a sudden therefore we must Express gratitude for whoever it is that did these Miracles what's with the mystery what's with pretending we don't know who did it why don't we say we therefore have to Express gratitude to hasem for the Miracles that he done because the most important thing about of gratitude is to recognize that there's something to be grateful for in fact those are the words we don't call it we call it hakar the word hakar means to recognize hatov means the good saying thank you begins with realizing there's something to say thank you for first you have to recognize the good and then you could feel gratitude for it if you're not a personality who you won't even see that there's a good that happened you know sometimes you hold the door for someone they walk right through it they don't even say thank you because if you're not a person who notices someone just likeing nice for you you're not gonna say thank you you have to see someone did something good so said why does it say we specifically describe it mysteriously so that we'll go on the search mission and say okay let's starts with this the first thing I do is realize that wow something really good happened to me and then I say who did that good thing I need to say Thank you so if I A Grateful person who lives with gratitude and sees the good that I need to feel grateful for I will be driven to have amuna if I see good and I feel gratitude I'm going to try to find the person that I need to say thank you to so it's kind of counterintuitive it's not that if I have a lot of amuna then I say thank you but rather if I train myself to say thank you it will lead me to amuna to see Hashem in my life so if I say you know I'm not just going to take for granted and go to sleep every night and take for granted that my day had it what it had in it every night I'm going to sit and recount with my family or by myself or in a journal I'm going to think about the good things that happen and then you can't help but when you riew or read what you just said all the good things that happen you're going to say wow where where did that all come from Who provided that who gave me that you're going to find so what we find is the biggest obstacle to to Faith is arrogance so says we have we have one character trait which reinforces and grows amuna we have one character trait which is the biggest obstacle to amuna G arrogance the ego the eye the honor that gets in the way of a relationship with Hashem but an attitude of gratitude to look for and to see and to say thank you for the incredible gifts in my life every day that will lead me on a path towards finding Hashem which brings me to the other handout let's look out for two more minutes to conclude the other handout includes here on the bottom of the right hand column from the author of that we say on Friday night the so in his he has the following it's connected to this week's para and it's connected to what we just read so give you TOR for the part for the for the shabas table to remember the good that hm does for you and to think about them is in itself a Mitzvah it's not just like a nice thing a righteous thing if you go to the Amun you should do that kind of thing it's a Mitzvah there's a Mitzvah every day to stop and say wow he did this that and the other wow electricity wow indoor plumbing wow a roof over my head wow a car wow a cell phone wow my faculties work wow and where do you see it's a Mitzvah St the remember says mosha to the Jewish people he's standing there at the end of their 40-year travels they're on the cusp of entering the land and he says to them listen listen you people who previously have been ungrateful and encourageable listen you need to to remember the whole way that hasm took you for 40 years remember the bread the stuff that fell from the heaven you didn't work you didn't have to collect a paycheck you didn't have to shop and cook wow you didn't have to fight should we have milk or fls remember 40 years looking back on these 40 years mosha tells them remember your clothing never got old never went out of style and never wore out your shoes they never got old they never wore out all of a sudden the Pas mosha in his speech is not telling them don't forget to finish sh and don't forget to do he says don't forget to look at the good in your life and say thank you to hasem if we are still obligated to remember the good he did for us back then for the 40 years in the desert all the more so we have to reflect on and be grateful for the good he's doing for us today in our lives says remember the miracle once a week you read about how the have foiled the plot of Kamas or hasah a suicide bombing a tunnel attack remember K foils the the these two makas these two who want to boycot and isolate Israel and hurt her they'll be knocked out off is never reelected never heard from again they'll disappear into the dust of history with the Persians and the Romans and the countless others who persecuted oppressed and tried to destroy us and here we still are so if you feel you don't have to have any you don't have to say thank you to hasem how many have tried to annihilate and exterminate us and here we are that doesn't mean you can let our guard down of course we have to confront them and battle them but it means that if we're remembering the past then we should think about the Miracles of the presence of every day and to remember the goodness done with us from the moment that we were created in our mother's womb and then we'll be humbled immediately we'll be humbled and we will strive to be our best selves yet this is the answer the so I come back to what we mentioned several weeks ago and close with this maybe you've been doing your homework likely you have not but of keeping a hash prce Journal you could start a WhatsApp group for your family you could have a pad and pen that you carry around with you you could write it in the note section or ever note on your phone but every day to write something down to not go to sleep without reflecting on your day and saying where was Hashem in my life where is the where are the Miracles for which I should be grateful today because every one of us have those Mir no matter how hard a day we Face there are people in this room and outside of it who are facing unfathomable hard days that that are Miracle to be able to get through but even on those days even on our worst day there are things to be grateful for there are things to be grateful for but we have to look for them and when we look for them and we feel gratitude then we're going to look for the one who gave us those good things and we'll be able to feel a greater sense of amuna so please continue your hash journal and make sure to write in it m we continue next week