Pesach Program 3: Would you like to say anything?

[Music] I'm Deborah Lasky and this is the rabbi Olaf ski show and welcome to our special raviolo ski Pesach program where they will not be too much swimming aerobics all those other exciting things that take place at Pesach programs just me I mentioned that the last podcast you know I would love to do just the Pesach program me and my family and talented and bring people together and and just have pace off together make it really the raviolo ski princess program but that would require me getting out of this chair and much like fan OHS I I don't believe this chair so those who appreciate the reference I used to read comic books when I was a kid Murray event so we are in number 28 of our rubber girl on ski show and this is number three of the special Pesach program and whether you're listening on tour anytime or wherever you listen to your podcast we're happy to have you on board and I tell this story all the time there's one of those stories I tell all the time many years ago I was invited to be Scotland residence at a pace of hotel this was the pace of hotel where my parents used to go and and they invited me to come it was actually the year that my father passed away and I was asked to not my mother wanted me to come until we made an arrangement but our family which was much smaller at the time and we came and I remember Eric Pesach I have to tell you I'm in the story in a story now the greatest channel is done by doing not by not by learning not by sitting in a classroom you could sit in a classroom and learn the Lords of shallowness and it's gotta be two different brokers and it has to be this sniff that's delivered and through Ashley at her and I grew up in North America Long Island I have to tell you that poem was not a major holiday in North America Long Island but but my Rebbe Rabbi Yaakov whale decided to invite us over his house for sort of a permit an early per Masuda he lived in this area Brooklyn called Borough Park I had never been the Bible you have understand I grew I was born in 1959 so if you lived in New York and the 60s and the 70s it was known that if a boy from Long Island went to Manhattan you had a life expectancy of about 3 minutes somebody would kidnap you they would kill you they would you you got off the Loyola railroad you took your life in your hands that's the way it was so we tried to stay out of it out of the city we tried to stay in the suburbs when it was safe you know with supervision you could go to a mall but that was about it we were we were terrified it so I'd never really I would go with my father to his store in Brooklyn downtown Brooklyn Flatbush and fourth Midtown floors to nursery Brooklyn's most fabulous floors and all the boys used to go in and help I I went in for a short period of time and I and I really just didn't have a gift retail flower business I don't know why my brothers all made arrangements they they always do things I I didn't have a gift for this I was the black rose of the family yeah I would be sitting I mean on that hey my father goes David what is this you know to get a pay-per-click and they will like link together you know there thank you he's the styrofoam and you stick in pins sort of different colors for corsages so he says you know just put in the different boxes of pins into it David I didn't know cuz I'd never made things I had made a little mosaic stuck all the way into the heads because how am I supposed to put it I didn't know yeah anyway after a while he he asked me if I would instead stay home without my mother instead of coming into the store which I did I mastered the domestic seals much better than I did retail flowers tickles and but so I'd written to my father still in Brooklyn that was about it I'd never been to bar welcome in life and we drive in my friend's father drove us in listen to the Megillah in the shul there and I see there's this young TIFF that I had never seen and I was sorta never heard of it people are running around in costumes Lucia Manos you know it's I had never seen it who whoever stood firm and so it was yeah so I could read it better in a book from the days tomorrow doesn't mean anything I was teaching in a Hebrew school and it was the bar bat mitzvah class and this was like the Agatha Agatha Christie novel Ten Little Indians you know one by one people you don't die off and disappear every time somebody would get Bar Mitzvah that's it they would they wouldn't stop coming to the class and my my class was dwindling in fact this priest minister and rabbi got together to discuss common communal problems and discussing structural problems in their buildings and the priest said look we have a problem we have bats in our belfry I'm gonna get rid of them and the minister said yeah we have the same problem we have Church mice the rabbi says you know in the show the Attic we had pigeons but I got rid of him he says how'd you get rid of him I chased them all into the show I gave him a bat mitzvah they flew away they never came back I said story but so they would disappear now the week before Pesach the PTA told me this is the budget to spend on your model Seder now if you've never seen a model Seder my goodness have you missed out on some basically we set the table kilo it's a seder I said if it's the Seder night we have grape juice instead of wine and they have lettuce leaves they have Matz's and I've good filter fish and you know one kid is the grandfather you know sometimes he actually gets a little white beard to wear some little kid is a little kid who asked the manager to know which I guess it's cast typing yeah typecasting might dyslexia anyway and there's the mother you know it's a thing and they act it out you know and they go through the steps of the Seder that's cute second grade third grade these kids are in seventh grade but again bar/bat Mitzvah already they're disappearing I'm gonna make another metal sated with them you know I have another lettuce leaf and a piece of gefilte fish so I took my budget and the kids came in and they said are we are we going to have the model say to where's the metal Seder I said we're doing something different go to the bathroom wash your hands with soap fight they came back every two kids had a grater I said we're going to great horseradish they said horseradish comes in a jar - trust me it doesn't this is peeled horseradish go ahead they started now any of us who grew up with Pesach like I say I didn't grow up in a show I shot my song but we had pasted that with Pesach Seder no grading the horseradish and you're you you're crying you wait til there's enough and you stick it in your brother's face yeah these are these are some of the cultural things that that our jug rowing up in our house understands they were very excited now go bring your your greatest to the bathroom wash it out now we're gonna make her roses and they may have chlorosis by the traditional recipe a piece for the greater piece for me piece of you know Apple for the greater piece for me you know you grating up the furrow sess yep I said now we're gonna wash the romaine lettuce what for us it's the bugs gonna check if I'm like there's no bugs let's see Oh disgusting I'm a vegan letters are younger than fine yep I brought in a little broiler we boiled the eggs we brought the Ezria kids who were not interested in anything came to life and that Claire's like I had never seen and we wrapped everything up but they said can I use this at the Seder I said yes put it in the back of the refrigerator you know in the plastic bag and just don't let it touch anything you know you have to grow up with it parenthetically when people I had discussed this idea of making my own Orlovsky Pesach program for years and people said to my would you do I said well one thing is Erev Pesach I would get ready for the Seder I was at a very harsh of a Pesach program under a very fine house gossip and I went for two years and the first year I was shocked because of the at the at the table you know they give you a little Kyra there wasn't enough lettuce today I would have a romaine lettuce they'd be able to make it because I use for everybody so I think you're telling the way to bring more bring my keys between plates of letters yeah especially you know there's one sure for the stalks of one for the leaves and most of my family likes to stalk so this is a rage on the day anyway the next year Arif paisa I said can I can I go in the kitchen and prepare my own lettuce they said sure so they had the pre-wash there's etc and I was cutting off the leaves and taking the stalks and measuring the cos a sim and putting them into little bags so I came to the table with my cos a sin like I always do so I said I said the activity of Pez would be getting ready for Pesach so I went to this hotel I was a skull skull in residence and they offered Erev Pesach which usually the earth Pesach they were swimming there was tennis there was the sauna was open there was you know and they also had lectures and they had a class on napkin folding in front of the dining room and also me so one of the options and some people actually came was very nice I said we spend so much time preparing for the Seder preparing for Pesach if you stay home there's all the cleaning and there's the shopping and there's the cooking and missiles setting up if you go away to hotel is all the packing and all the schlepping and it all comes down to the Seder and tonight there is a mitzvah for you to talk to your children and for your children to listen to you get anything you wanna say have you given any thought to the Pesach Seder or are you going to say the same thing you said last year and five years ago and 10 years ago someone told me once this what they talk about a lawyer with ten years of experience or a lawyer with one year of experience ten times just keep doing the same thing color them suruc liras has arts money every person has to see himself as if he came out of Egypt Iran difficult disease and in order to do this it's a struggle for us to find relevance you know how hard it is to find a message that's gonna have meaning and 2019 and especially if you're like me where the people when you say to span a whole range of ages from little children to look to older children to two teenagers preteens teenagers adults 20-somethings 30-somethings and you have to you have to engage you have to spend some time thinking about this people just walk into the Seder it's an amazing thing to me it was it was a it was a life-changing experience for me I have a daughter who goes every day to sleep us either she goes in the morning or she goes at night and she came to me the first time and she says actually she comes to me every year and she says could you go over the sleep house with me what do we say what do we leave out what do we skip how do we say it and I go through the sleeve house it's a completely different experience if you walk into sleepers then you've never opened up your sleeves yeah you try to remember from years past not gonna be meaningful to you wait show me this if you read through the sleeve hose beforehand it's an amazing thing Shabbos a girdle this Shabbos we're supposed to read na Haggadah and it gives you a certain level of preparation going into the seder give you some thoughts I I one year bought this Haggadah which basically has a paragraph and lines underneath for people to write in their own physician none of my kids did nobody ever did but it's it's a nice exercise just for yourself one of the many times that I have is I really want to put up my own hagatha because it's I want to have one where there's points that you can ask and make and try to be you know meaningful to the people and then I'll have bigger discussions in the back and have everything clear and it would be a spiral laminated so you'd spill a wine all over and stuff this is one of the many projects that I that I want to do but but I have to think beforehand when I'm walking into the Seder what is the message I want to give a cross what do we want to do so basically from the hotel Pacer we're gonna be giving you some helpful hints about the seder and setting things up so let's start at the beginning I start the beginning I said this yesterday about two days ago ya have a checklist know exactly what I need for the seder and the more preparation that you put into it the better will be your experience here is the usual pay self experience yeah people go to shore and if you have the minute at the end of diverting they say hallo and the person saying hallo has all the time in the world and then you have to say could you lift everybody and then you work harder then you come home and I get a chase every table now begins the fight over the seating I want to sit over there I want to sit over there I want to sit next to aya I don't want to sit next up arrangements and then till you've worked at all out yeah it's the Paris Peace Accords is trying to work out where everybody's gonna sit fine then there's the actual fighting over the chairs because you know everybody wants to lean and so therefore they need a pillow you know to lean against but that only works with a chair with arms and there's only two of them and the Abba gets one and so everybody's fighting over the remaining one yeah and then there's the fight over the pillows because even people who don't have any arms they want to have a pillow to recline on even though if you have a straight back chair I don't know what you're doing with it but everyone's fighting why'd you take the pillow for my room take the pillow from your own room never put back papilla fighting over the pillows right okay then begins the grape juice wine discussion should I have wine I don't know I get sick when I have wine it's really little that's good I certainly for the first cup all right can I mix some grape juice I'm just gonna grab it okay you pour for me I pour for you porfavor yeah and everybody's pouring and trying to work this all out too we have it all done now we open up the Matz's the search for the perfect Amata I want it round I want it whole I don't want to crack any holes in it yeah and each matzah has to be taken out and held up for personal examination until that is all done you set up your three notches right when people make kiddush everybody makes skittish even people who are not such good kiddush makers make kiddush yeah and then we go to the manage ten huh and everybody says - no no they say it in Hebrew they say it in English they say then you dish say that's why healy say it in Spanish state and now we finally get down to the Seder and if you're lucky enough that we achieve about huh he pulls out his first box of notes and starts going into a beautiful reply of about hommerson matzah and the beautiful biscuit Akira you know isin the compressor and cut Shimon yet and at some point you realize your Seder is in trouble you know the Sailor is in trouble when the father begins assigning roles to the four sons Russia Mao who own there so there's somebody designated unofficially maybe said uncle maybe it's a cousin maybe the kid who goes that's it let's go my my my my my my my my my my time in a minute minute how do you know there were ten blazes it's 50/50 bag zips bag do things were fifty make so remember company I'm air anyone who doesn't understand these three things and I do see the apostle laughs and then we come to the eating pot we've waited for and you'll be surprised by this point even a piece of cardboard matzah looks good to you yet and the father starts breaking off trying to get a kiss eius with a combination from the top and the middle matzah for every person which is impossible impossible so either you make sure everybody has their own three Montes can do their own little little process there all right you do what some people do which is they measure they pre measure out the matzah and they put it in little plastic bags and they distribute them to everybody along with the whole piece of the hamachi matzah and this way you know that you have a ship and then come tomorrow and we start the whole measuring process again and we then you have the fight over the stalks and the leaves yeah and and we move along and by the time we get to the meal everybody's saying we got it move it along I don't know that we're maximizing the Seder experience when we do it that way in my opinion it's always bothered me someone told me a story about a guy who comes to vulajin and the first night he goes through hyams Seder a real brisk a seder and I sit down they bring out three burnt matches yeah and they spend the whole time saying give return to return finally look at the UH gotta go they quickly eat an enormous shift Burt might see you know and then they used to arrange for the for the murder you know it and then they have a little bit super no time five he called me they the are you coming and then they said and say they returned the whole night that was his first Seder seconds and he went to narrative three white beautiful matches and everybody's sitting around and smiling a lot of singing things moved along very nicely they had a beautiful Sudha so the person who taught me the story I said so who's right he says I don't know but which sailor would you rather go to and that to my mind encapsulate what you have to do when you're planning a seder which Seder would you like to go to yeah would you enjoy that well what say we do Toya how do you and now let's extend it a step further what's ADA would your kids like to go to so someone told me that they went to those Schwartzman's Seder shiva based atomic and he tried as concussion cassia's all night he's sitting there with his children his grandchildren and they're singing am i telling stories you know it keeps throwing nuts out to the children you know every one that I would ask Akash and he would say I don't know have a nut and that was the focus of the Seder it was it was a great time he says but didn't get they asked all my caches yeah somebody told me they went to a seder with relationship Europe and the whole Seder he's talking to the children anytime the Midrash him and he's telling them stories etc you know he finished well before cut sighs and then he said she Reshiram and he said what the rest of the night but the Seder itself was was not only kid-friendly but kids centric so I told the story of somebody and I said yeah every fortnight was the same thing that's what his said it was like so this is the question and and so for myself my show tequila if you want your Seder to be something that's going to be enjoyable then it requires planning and thought and you can't sit down at the say tonight and open up your hug go there with other have you looked at it and decide what am I gonna do with this and how am I gonna run this thing I need preparation okay you have to set up the seder plate how do you set up to say to play romantic labor with so she becomes higher was hearing arts show someone called the Robertson was blacking of course zero pacer says yeah what do you want I have to talk to the Shiva yeah why what do you want to ask him I want to ask how he sets up a seder plate he opens up the huh God looks at the picture like everybody else so think beforehand here's a tidbit if you haven't picked this up at this point because you know I don't know how it works in America you know but in but in HL you go from your parents to your in-laws your parents your parents and then you keep doing this until you know you already have your own grandchildren and they're expecting to come to you people make things out of it and when you want to want to bro the egg boil it first otherwise you just take it and put it on the fire has a tendency to explode this is the voice of experience coming to you through the years yeah boil at first I told you make you a list of preparations for the Seder some people have the Minnick of eating an egg that's the first thing they have there's a lot of reasons for this people eat an egg so we quickly you know Eric pays off I know cuz I don't have that many pots and you don't have as many pots of pace up as you do to me here so so you make a freshman how many how many eggs do I need right I have a seder I've got 18 people at the Seder I need 18 eggs right excellent make 26 you would K both get here later you'd ever get why because their pace of people gonna be eating eggs don't kid yourself and think that they won't so make sure you have the eggs sold water I spoke once with it was a firewall esteem for a pentose Palestine ushiro are you talk they were they made prepays program he mentioned that you in America you can buy saltwater here in Israel you know we're behind the time so we have to make our own saltwater we take what away it's old man that's saltwater and make sure you have that make sure you have your car pass what's your car bus what is your purpose my father used onion I went to day school they said you can use onion you have to use parsley parsley I came home I said dad we have to use parsley he says that piously my father used onion I said no after use buzz listen parsley so it was one of his moments of compromise I must've been getting old but we put out onion and parsley years later I found the Haggadah of unison type shits where he says for Karpis you should use onion and there were those who use parsley and that's ridiculous because nobody eats parsley so you wouldn't even make a boat dumber so yeah my dad III found over the years than what my but dad know he knew yeah my father used potatoes because that was the closest they had in a lot of Eastern Europe to a green vegetable sometimes the potatoes themselves were green yeah and that's what they did oh we went to my in-laws for the Pesach Seder for years and we moved there it's well we made our first Seder I put out onion my father did and so everybody drank a cup of wine ate a piece of onion they all threw up spent the rest of the Seder night on the couch as I sang joyfully and as that year we switched to my father with my leg which is potato so I put out potato and I put out onion I don't know what it is to use those Menachem Lavinia is died T the best thing to use would be celery that's what I think if you don't have a minik that's my advice because it's supposed to be like an appetizer and it fancy affairs they actually put out celery sticks that you can dip in Sawle water so it doesn't get a better met and it's green and it's a dumber and before the meal perfect someone told me.there of your service elevator kick used to use strawberries this is why this cuz the whole point of carpets is to get the children to ask what's with more unusual than taking a strawberry making it by Vietnam and dipping it in salt water very little more unusual than that so so that's the way that he would that he would do it but whatever it is you have to make sure your car bus is set up when you grate your if you're using horseradish to create your Mora make sure that you have it in a sealed container so it does not lose its power using romaine lettuce again cut off the leaves from the stems for the people want the stems the people want the leaves measure it out and put it in little bags and at some point during the Seder before you get tomorrow people should say you have to cause a sim one for Maura and one for Clara you make your little sandwich so you say do you want leaves you want stalks you want to stalks you want to leaves one of each and just distribute all your bags before you get started can I make you her OSIS now I don't know why when I was growing up we had one thing of course we had one thing of salt water and my Seder I got a whole bunch of them all around the table I'm gonna sit there and wait while we pass around this hole but no but they will know here you go five bowls every one dip as much as you want is about five bowls of Commerce's everybody's dip dip your heart out yeah not a problem you make sure your area is yours right yeah when I was growing up it says a shank bone I to this day don't know what a shank bone is whenever I dance as a butcher for a shank bone he always gave me a piece of experience some people use a chicken wing some people use a chicken foot these are obviously wrong because my father didn't do it okay so anyway it's pleased to meet with the bone and it's roasted that's what you're supposed to have there's Vanessa yeah and you have everything we'll set up and make sure that this is set up beforehand yeah so as much as you can before hand to prepare prepare we have the fight of where everyone's gonna sit Erik pace on we bring over together we have everyone fight over their seats and then I make place cards and I put them on the table so when we get there you know what you were sitting the more preparation there is the better it's going to be we're gonna continue this in our next podcast of how to make a successful Seder and that's it for today I usually say that's it for this week but this has got a whole bunch of it's every two days that's it for these yo maíam there's no word in Hebrew in English for two days yeah here we have your my Emma yeah so if you want information on the show please go to reverie Alaska datacom slash podcast if you want information in this particular show please go to rub you ll see that comes there's podcast slash twenty eight if you wanna know about upcoming events a relapse key that comes lash events if you want to contact me it's River Alaska calm slash contact and if you would like to sponsor a podcast imagine the wonderful thing you're doing for Chloe's fell in turbulence key that accomplished podcast and click on sponsor an episode I'm rebel Lasky this is the rebel Alaska show [Music]