Infertility In Tanach With Rabbi Zave Rudman (Ep. 259)

hi this is do owski and welcome to the rabbi owski show whether you're watching with our friends over at toy time or wherever you watch or listen to your podcast as always we're excited to have you along especially for this special episode and do not forget to like subscribe and comment and is there something else share share I'll never get this down uh we have a sponsor for this episode is sponsored by Ruth Brisa in honor of shiffy and shim's 6th anniversary may we celebrate many more Simas together love from your mommy official chairman of the Milwaukee branch of the rabbi olowski fan club all right yeah all right I have to make it back out there to Milwaukee it's uh Milwaukee reminds me a little bit of when I went to yiva and Rochester where we said there were two seasons there was winter and July so you know Milwaukee's a little bit on the chil side for me but I can always go to Miami now I understand it's delightful this time of year anyway um so uh I I'll give the briefest of introduction to this very special episode because um for those of you who remember when Nixon was President he was brought down by the Watergate scandal whether he deserved to or not is something that revisionists have been discussing whether it was an overreaction but uh the it was basically revealed by two reporters of the Washington Post Woodward and Bernstein uh it was made into a movie All the President's Men with Robert Redford and uh Dustin Hoffman if I recall correctly in any event um the uh uh the entire premise was that they had someone inside the administration who was leaking information who they referred to as deepthoat and it was decades later that we found out who it actually was who was revealing the information so those of you who are longtime offici onad and I know there are a lot of them in the rabbi olowski Community who have listened to everything that I have ever said and therefore will no doubt be part of the prosecution's case against me when the time comes knows it every and then I make reference to my friends who I go to when I'm stuck and uh and and check out whether or not what I'm saying has any veracity to it or not so I'm going to reveal one of my deepthoat sources today I've tried to keep him on the QT you know my Rabbi Z Rudman who uh we go back to 19 uh 77 197 77 yeah was it kadan yeah it was tell by m anyway it kadan 1977 and um uh you know my my favorite one of my favorite RAR Redman quotes was when I said to him you know is there a mcor for what I'm saying and he said no I said can I say it and he said you you could say anything and that has been the principle upon which uh G made my entire career and so Rabbi Redmond what a privilege it is to welcome you to the rabbi olowski show such a privilege to be here in the not the first time we've been here for many Simas and other events but uh now to be here like this is you know it's is an opportunity as The Show Goes On I'm slowly running out of people I have any relationship with so who could say yeah I knew you you know it's like so people come on and they're like who are you so let's tell people a little bit about you you grew up in Brooklyn yeah and uh um you uh there something very important who was my who was my cousin go ahead my cousin was RAB yob whale Jacob wh that was the man who was M of me the only reason that that uh I and I would guess by extension my whole family is from today you know re re Fel who started uh Hebrew Nasa County has ultim responsibility but very well was the one who Mish came after me with forethought malice and dragged me in and uh after I became from he would tell me from time to time you know Orlowski you're going to get me into olaba and I would say Reby we're both in a lot of trouble if that's true I still remember the H you gave for him yeah it was uh it was special anyway in Brooklyn yeah yeah and you went to well the finest schools yeah yeah PS 183 uh no miva high school right but actually you mentioned Milwaukee theiva Milwaukee when it started Milwaukee Raby wax yeah was a cousin of mine and he sort of brought me into the world especially since we were all because we close to right through far so uh then when I came to show I came to and that's where our paths crossed that's right and that's where your life came to an abrupt halt now I found out agav that your father was the president of the Orthodox Association of Orthodox Jewish scientists right what kind of scientist was he he was actually a chemist he was a crystallographer as opposed to someone one of my teachers once who didn't really understand what that was and called him a christology he got a little bit upset about that but um he was a CH he was chemist yeah I found this out because uh over the years I have made vain attempts to try to you know uh beat out rebby Redmond at something I have never succeeded but I remember we were learning um NE and he was comparing Naran to a glass blower now I had as a kid gone to a revolutionary uh era Village and I watched him made glass I said have you ever seen the made glass he goes yeah my father used to make his own test tubes I was like okay I quit so and your mother was in turo college she was librarian in tour college right yes mhm so my father dropped out of school after ninth grade to go to work support his family during the Depression so I'm always amazed at people who grew up in relatively normal surroundings you know and then you you were in and at some point you developed a relationship with how did that happen um actually how did it happen it was in t 1986 before everyone knew who he was not so much people knew he was already a Riva in mishor what was known as split and um for those who know Yesa history and um who was very close toin and also ketki was right when they were both nift and he gave a sheer he so much give a sheer he gave a hesit about his relationship with them and what he had learned from them he had a very close relationship with and I sat down to learn the had relationship with yeah when in the early 1960s when the Auda was join forces with the church in order to get funding for parochial schools they needed someone who would be in charge of the negotiations and who could make the T decisions how much can we work with the church or not and for some reason I don't know exactly how R shade ended up being the person he said I can't make such decisions and R Feinstein as the head said my door is open whenever you need you can come in but Ros Shapiro didn't have a relationship Shapiro knew rste he's told stories about meeting he didn't have a relationship but I get mixed up withough we say but but what's interesting is my kids remember when either of them would call the house they would say it's m really yeah one of my kids one time one time called my house for whatever reason and one of my kids came holding the phone like it was like I don't know the I know the or kodes you know ABA it's it's he said it's m Shapiro but it's m Shapiro on the phone you know so um but he spoken about we he spoken about the and I sat down to learn it and I learned the Su as well as I could at that time learned the mar and I looked at Mar whatever a little bit of mar we knew at that time there wasn't any Mar with any kind of footnotes they were barely marals and I had reached a certain dead end and I mentioned to someone in in sh that I was learning the su he said oh there this there's this Rabbi R who gives a she every Thursday night at the time it was not what it was later on when there were hundreds of people people would come and he just spoke about it and to show you how long ago this was he brought me a cassette tape mhm and for those who know what do you what a cassette tapes and pencils have in common yeah nobody uses them anymore well no you know what they have in common what what are cassettes tapes tapes and pencils have in common yeah when the tape gets would get mixed up you have to like pencil thing right come on you have to be a certain age to know that right so I was listening to this somebody pointed out that the when you sell somebody you sound like a broken record they have no idea what you're talking yeah so um he gave me the tape and I tried listening to it it was also it wasn't of the audio technology the audio that we have nowadays that we're doing like right now and I could barely hear it okay I tried I heard as much as I could but I really didn't get it a few days later there was a wedding of a student of my wife who taught the wife was teaching in shans and um we were waiting for the mad and randomly because Ro doesn't run the world randomly someone said oh you see that Rabbi waiting there for the m also his name is he's a big I said oh and I walked over to him and I said in Hebrew you know was a cassette and I didn't really get to the end of it and couldn't really understand it would the tell me over what the end of the she was now for those who know that's I'm surei Has Told many stories about him over the past years the usually it would be hard to imagine what would happen at that point and for some reason I had a lot of and he said come we're waiting anyways for the m and it was in the it was in the parking lot of mosha or I still remember this where when there was a wedding hall in mosha or was a parking lot he walked in the parking lot he didn't say over this year to me he said what did you get to and I told him as far as I got and he said so then we added and he told me the end of the shear that was the end of what passed where I had gotten and I I walked away from there I said to myself wow I got to listen to this R um at the same time one of the reasons why I did make this connection with him is there was the who actually had been roommate Inon I once I mentioned him to and he said ah he told me his name before Hadar he was something like ederman or something I don't remember exactly but it is it was a different name he said yeah we were roommates in Kevon and um someone had introduced me to hisu or and I started learning in fact I actually one time tried learning a piece of for those who know anything about it didn't go very well no but it he said to me he said if this works for you that's good but I have what I have they I mean they they won't learn it's notah they won't learn it's not I mean they have a very good specific approach to mus that there is there m from slatka and there is no it yeah and someone had introduced me to ruk through Avari and I already been reading ruk so I started going to when I could on Thursday nights and um then so that I mean that brought you I mean this makes you especially in the world this makes you really um I'm trying to think of a different word for Rebel uh this makes you uh much more creative out outlier I think is the word you're looking for outlier outlier right because uh um I I mean I think really R desla was the one who tried to take you know muser and and tie it together with kidus so there's the he was after slightly later they were he was slightly younger was slightly younger than rler I asked once about R desler so he says uh you know I said where did he get his Mahal from because he made it up he says he took he took cabala he took M no he took cabala he took he tookas he took this you know mixed all together and called it m so made it up so you've heard the story about with him and lein who that no when when was the he was after lived in his house he was about 14 or 15 at time and he was already learning in panovich and rat lein came to visit rler and on the way back from daving they were both still wearing their ts and Fillin ratal who was a whole different approach gave um was giving was speaking very strongly Toler about what is this new thing that you created what did you create over this isn't what we learned in K he was definitely reactionary yeah and there was aug Kell that when you when you listen when someone gave you mus or someone questioned you you held your hands in a particular way you held your head down and you listen quietly and you waited and when the person finished you waited another beat and you said can I speak now and ratko went on and on as they were walking back from the panovich toler's home and Ra was walking behind them and when R finished rler waited that beat and said can I speak and rasal said yes and rler said anyone who thinks you can give muser after the war like before the war thinks the world after the war is like the difference is this is like the world before the mobble and after the mobble that was his response there's no question that that ratko was definitely a throwback yeah when ratko came to panovich they he basically oted of desler yeah you know um tried to remove all that remove Freelander went in aot he left he left Isa for a little while to even though he still calls but he still he had to leave for a while that was the story went to yeah you know criticizing that he was doing R's Mahal so he says you and I heard the from the goes way I heard yeah and he made some kind of sound I would be but the Kish used to come here of really yeah would come would come to he of and um in we both grew up the one time sent a f Med to ask of hutner where did this confir what it's that what my father learned with you by by by by The Altar and was basic answer was I'm doing basic also I'm doing what I want yeah but um yeah but it's uh it's a different so you and you're doing you at some point you got into the Mah to some degree you know at some point you got into the spases because you put out you know uh footnotes on the sases now that's that's is 101 there's no s you know he's maybe on the on the edge over there the world but said was born a litvak I always I'm like I always compare compare myself but I wanted to write that you know I'm like I started a and then I became so you consider yourself now no okay let's clarify I we though do you my mother was my mother came from so I do have a certain connection Tobak no I don't have a tshb no yeah anyway I have one but it's called a bath R so it's not exactly the same thing but anyway so uh so so you Mama should expand it out because you know I remember number of times the had a question and answer and people asked him has the rash ever finished sh and he would never answer the question yeah you were there once right wouldn't answer the question so uh so has a much more narrow uh I think they would say focused approach focused approach when when they look at something and uh and RHA has a global approach you know and I remember you said to me once something very interesting uh I remember most of what you say um he said I've know I know other people who know everything but I never met anyone who has a Mahal in everything like you could ask with M anywhere and he's thought about it you know has a Mah to it it's not just that I want I mention to someone that R used to have a she m shabas in his house years ago 40 you know in the when he was much younger where with a group of close Alum where Isa will come and ask him a question about whatever it would be yeah what they were learning in gamar they whatever it would be this is mentioned actually in in one of a famous famous English book that a lot of people read Raa would then think for a second and then give a Shear that would Encompass all of them right I mentioned this to someone from a different generation who learned in Yas before the world ofas became so popular and his response was H that's like a trick and I didn't respond cuz the person was old than that's what R buman said once he says it's smoke in mirrors that's it was his expression my my my my yeah and um my my thought is different you know if you go to a doctor I just actually had this you know do we talk about our medical conditions you can talk about anything you want so there's no filter there's no filter okay so this is not a haris interview we are not going to edit this so I have a certain medical condition uh epilepsy whatever that's whole story and of itself and for a different medical condition I started taking different medication and it threw my epilepsy totally off and I wrote to my doctors my epilepsy specialist and they said oh this interacts with that and therefore you're having this reaction so stop taking that medication yeah I thought to myself imagine you go to a doctor guy goes to medical school he wants to become an orthopedic surgeon so he never studies spleen and liver right would you really want to go to him course in the end the knee bones connected to the thigh bone right so and that's which has the T has that is is the structure of the human body our M are connected to the human body the whole thing does join together it's not smoking mirrors I mean Romans you know I understand sometimes people people do it in a way that smoking mirrors but someone who really knows the T understands how it really is one complete body right and you can bring a mission m in in all I definitely do smoking mirrors okay because like my kids did this thing where they wrote down three random things on a piece of P like different stacks of paper you take three of them you have to speak about it for two minutes you know they they play the game I had no problem it was all smoking mirrors but I'm saying the way rosha grasped the Torah it wasn't just that he had a Mahal and everything it was one Mahal because to him Torah was one complete unit it was one human body it was that all joined together and that was the way he viewed the Torah and and listening and being in the presence someone like that hearing him speak like that was was just eye opening you know eye opening mind opening so you have and now you're learning you're learning you're learning all these things is there a contradiction I want to actually ask your that question he said you learned in slatka right you know you learned in Kevon and now there's this whole other part right and he said to me what's the difference he also said to me if you don't have the foundation of mus person who I mean again I'm not saying talking about learning and people in different themselves but a person doesn't have the foundation of of of what these standard things that are learned in mus which can be learned through but a person doesn't have that Foundation the rest of it you are just building on some level smoking mirrors on top of that your person there are things person does need to learn and does need to gain from within having you know on a basic way before you start getting off and flying off into other places where it's easy to be very theoretical but you have to then make it practical there are was I just saw beautiful pamphlet for that started here in her but it's built in a way which is building the Bim including that also they may not call it muser but they're including that also within what they do so saying it's it's interesting a who went on want to become a Dian so when he was learning he said to me he says for the you have to go to but for learning you got to go to a that's the way that he put it but uh so you got into uh did you ever finish this like I know you were putting out contrust on different subjects and writing uh you know footnotes on them Etc I never I did on the I did I did a few small ones that I did for some of my children's weddings I published them I have sitting on my computer I'm actually restarting now the one on thil and I'm going to write actually it's actually probably going to be half in English half in Hebrew meaning an English overview and then in the back a Hebrew actual safer I'm thinking of doing that Onin I actually was told to do that by a few different people um as a as a I don't know I don't want where use the word schoola but if you have a neurological issue you should write something on F and Ro and my wife has been after me for a number of years that you really have to do this you're familiar with why is you after you to do things no no okay good okay no because I lost my hearing at some point anyway but uh she sends me emails to remind me that's interesting oh then she says to me how can you never check your phone so I'm sure there must be some emails ped up but but uh and I I I would be uh neglectful if I didn't mention that you have a email that you send out that's also a uh a Blog at this point yeah called uh Tor Thoughts by RAB Tor thoughts right and if somebody wanted to uh access that just search Z redond and look for my WordPress blog and you can find it okay and through that you can either sign up for it for the blog you can sign up for the uh emails it's all accessible there and I will give just one one shout out and that is that uh I know you did a lot of work in zirus and chabas and I have been after you to put that out as a safer because I think that is you know H since your wife decided to guilt trip you about the T Ro I just wanted to point out that you know after you know sheris when the terrible tragedy took place there were those gum who said it happened on chabas so we have to M ourselves in chabas so last year I did a whole series on on chabas and I would have love to have had you a safer on zirus to be able to sayot Inus so we are waiting for that but that's none of that is what we're here to talk about because uh Rik and maybe just you know because Rik is an interesting character because as you mention he came from the lisher world and he is somehow even the the lisher world that doesn't um learn and that's becoming smaller and smaller the truth is you know I mean Once Upon a Time you know Miss nagd and kid were fighting in the streets you know and it was all kinds of things and today somebody said to me what's the difference between lfish and kidish I said lfish learns and they sing I said sing and they learn reminds me of Stephen Allan Steve Allen's definition uh the difference between capitalism and communism he says in capitalism man oppresses man and in communism is the other way around so uh you know so it's it's it's grown much closer but even even when there was you know more of that tension R sik was considered acceptable yeah R sik also was a fascinating person he was born into a lisher family descendants of the T liin right um no he that's where that's where he ended he ended in Lin he was born somewhere in Lita okay and um he was a genius as a child and the tragedy happened I don't want to go into the details and he traveled around Europe meeting different dolm and among them he met the yzer and we met the yzer he was captivated by the yzer and became and during that school of thought and school of thought of which is the more L Type ofus and that's where he found his home I they say his family said shiv on him they didn't sit shiv on him that's uh whe that's that or know if there's any truth one way or the other but um and then he sat and learned there um just to mention where it's we recording this it's the right so there's minute to start building your so was very mock on that you know he would start building a he would sit down to learn from beginning to end that night that was how you start building your suu right you know so um that was and um we have from him numerous F I mean the original way it was printed was 11 volumes now as F have this habit of multiplying and expanding you know into a larger and larger you know space what's his most famous work his most famous work is probably but um or but there's also the prad prad actually wasn't what he wrote It's what his wrote afterwards from what he would say at the shabas and that's on that's yeah they all go by sh because they spoke on shabas that's when they you know that's when they spoke I mean look look you won't find on there was no Yesa so there's no sho from the altar on AEV right because there was no Yesa then you know if you look at that you know you look at it in the same sort of par way all of them because they had every shabas sure so but prad actually mostly prad he didn't write was written down and there Parts which they have from his but the prad is also very famous because it's on the par people take it out in chabas and look at it it's but Al once again it's not the kind of thing you just like take out on shabas and look at meaning it's something each piece is a page two pages that can quote and on a page you can quote 30 40 50 references from tanak to to to Z to the to the all his or do he have any there choose from him there there's also like many other people from his generation there were thousands of pages of manuscripts that were lost right of all kinds of other writings that were lost in the you know in the Holocaust and we don't they're gone destroyed maybe hidden away somewhere at some point they'll come back who knows but um so there was one safer that you decided to use as the basis to put out this beautiful safer which uh and Hashem remembered them and this is based on whicher of so one of the tragedies of R's life was that he never had children and within all his different Forum he wrote a safer called right the one who remembers those who are baren and he bases it on AAL says that there were six women who didn't have children Sarah Rifka Rael the what called the mother of Shimon and Isis and then he said there's a seventh one which is like we say as we say that the the baren woman should be rejoiced we make that BR at every single I have to say that none of those are really good examples cuz they all ended up having children so that's exactly the point M so it doesn't really if you want to talk about childless people those who go on to have children it seems like a bad example and the answer is remembers right that's what we did we began the laning says right says that on were they were remembered so here so everyone can see it oh thank you right for the rabi sign yeah okay I think rowski wrote it um I will one of the things that I have done well throughout my career is take credit for things that other people have done you know every now and then you find someone who's an un of and they say I don't want to take credit I said I'm more than happy to yeah so um now why did this interest you why you have a fine Mish you know um there was someone in my family who did not have children so quickly but the fact that this is actually just recently saw in a different podcast by a different well-known Jewish podcaster who said as far as he knows this is the only sa on fertility in the entire Jewish Library really yeah is that interesting you know no one else wrote about it as a topic and in my learning through and trying to learn through different parts of I mean one point said to me there isn't the difficult I teach a lot of Navi there isn't the difficult sui which which does not explain so started learning through the and W sh has the whole is about sorry the entire kosim was all about shim that's a tough story yeah so he goes He Go basically kosim is about Shimon but within the SE also there's a section on shim because shimon's mother gave birth to him and we'll see how that's con we in moment we'll see how that's connected so he said this is this person said this is only book of on baress it's not a book of stories it's not a book of look so to speak in amuno which are important it's not a book of schoos it's a book where he analyzes what each woman had to do in order to break through that barrier meaning said right there are three keys right said there are three keys one is the key to giving birth inition we know that three things that are not totally the masle person is B right so therefore and the general way created the world is the world was created in order for people to have children so why are these people not have children and then have children so and then he asks a second question which is well why are there six of them in tanak once tanak teaches me something I don't need to be taught it a second time right so it must be that each one of these is a so what's thees of each one what was the of s what was all the way through to the and he wrote it's actually in Hebrew it's a pretty small safer it's 60 depending which Edition but again it's about 60 pages and just the idea fascinated me and um I sat down to learn it and try to think about it now for those who studied you have an advantage in that you've been teaching n for many years so you know some of I know that there's something called Yeshua even say them in order sometimes yeah you know that line fora WR a from Navi and he says what do we learn from this he goes apparently that you have to wear stockings that's what every P I teach I told you that story yeah know that's what I'm saying when I first started teaching said to me he said to me please do me one favor teach it what the navi says not that every P Nai in the end is something that someone Muster that someone needs to do yeah but he said in the once he said he he says you know we don't really learn na'vi girls learn na'vi so what is the Pu coming to teach me where stockings says that's what every PK and N he comes to teach us he says but maybe there's something else here so yeah well my my son actually calls tanak the Torah yeah you know which brings the PK so there's something where all thear quotes are brought right right you know where do we know a we know thear from thear we know the P we know the gar we know thear from Tas the way the joke used to go t because you saw the T says no but the B Luda brings it down like well first the T and then theud yeah but cheating for so anyway yeah so uh now this is not a translation this is an adaptation right because the translate rup sodok would be it's that doesn't make any sense he's writing it in this is the big problem I've had I've been working on a modern translation of missil for a very long time and it's very hard to do because I want to do it the way Arya Kaplan translated the Torah in the living Torah where you can read it like it's a book and it's very hard because his Lan is you know I don't want to use the word convoluted but it's because he's hiding so much cabala in it so he's saying in a few words a lot of very deep things that you have to try to put in so sadd also doesn't write with that level of clarity that when they write over Theo sh for example you know where you can just read it through like a like a novel so you have to adapt it so did you add in more stuff that R saduk says did I added in a lot of stuff from other places R saduk said I added in exclanation beforehand which obviously a person needs beforehand in order to understand it there's actually a chapter at the beginning about um just what the spheros are you know if you because he connects these Six Women each one of them to one of the sevenos that's a what are these things chapter just to give a basic understanding of it right you know nothing cabala but just an understanding I mean we say it by would always say it's printed in the so we can talk about it a little bit if it's already printed in the C so a little I heard say go it's a ran on so it's okay we can use it but um but the idea was to not just that but also he he goes sometimes obviously he jumps from topic to topic he'll jump he'll talk about one of the one of the women and then jump to a different one and then jump back right so to basically that's what you do with Theus because in order to find what the says even on one para it's a you have to search through everything to be able to get it because he he you know well every year he would go back to the same Med and give another little piece and another little understanding and another little bit and then if you want to do it by topic you know it's much harder because he he jumps around from so many different you don't know where he's going to be talking about something you know so s is also mixing and matching the concepts over here so obviously this took what ruk said and brought obviously brought it down a level but brought it down a level that it can be read that it's readable it's understandable it's in each one each one of the the women is in their own chapter and each one the main topics or the main subtopics are then explained with introductions before and what they're relevant and how to understand them and then connecting them back to what the specific issue was so um is is does this I mean I spoke U years ago for an organization called a time which are people who are married a long time and have been childless you know and uh I remember I I always get nervous when I have to speak to a particular audience that I don't want to be TR in fact there was one time I was writing a column in the hamia and there were two other people writing too and I got a lot of letters talk about this talk about that and I said there are two other people why don't you write to them he says because you talk about the real issues you know everybody else talks around without you know you know addressing the elephant in the room you know so uh so I was going to speak for a time and I said uh I said what do you want me to say what do you know like cuz don't say it's it's uh a supposed to be us right everybody says why was Rifka childless says Rashi because loves the of sikim and he wants you to Davin and he wants you don't say that say it stinks being us I said okay and I said wow this is terrible you guys have no kids this is a horrible thing so this is a whole different so what is this is this book to give to people who don't have children or or is it to give an understanding or to say listen as I guess from would have said it is what it is you know what I mean I mean none of this helped him he didn't have any children again like I said it's not a book of schoos in that sense and it what I what I call is a work of aod what did is he said what was Sor was aod what was and he talks about it actually from the woman's perspective also it's mostly from the perspective of the woman who doesn't have the child what did s yeah what did s do what right so he talks about it from that he talks about it from that approach and each one he says what there what was lacking in the world that they brought into the world does that mean that each individual woman who each individual couple that are don't don't yet have children are going to tie into one of these and that's going to be their a that's what they're supposed to do I don't know we don't have we don't have but in some way he's explaining the gates that opened for each of them are obviously if they're in the gates of right and even if a person even just learning we know affects the way the the world so I'm not saying reading this book is going to like you said not reading this book is not a schoola right but if a person wants to understand how a created the world and the way and the way created the world we learn through the T so this is part of what created and this is how he created it and what was done as he created it and this is an explanation of it and it gives gives an understand he didn't talk about himself he didn't talk about himself not at all right he doesn't mention himself and does he discuss the men involved here there is there is a section on the men he does have a section on the men there's a there's a separate area where he talks about the men I put that in a separate chapter of course it's a separate it's a whole separate din especially he separates it out in various different ways it's an interesting situation forgetting about the H implications if one you get married and it turns out that one of them has a problem that they can't have children so so do you stay married forget about the H implications the emotional implications of saying if I divorce this person and marry somebody else I'll be I'll have children do I decide to stay with this person and not have children or not we have neither of us have had that n so it's uh I'm thinking specifically of kushki who apparently him and his wife could not have children and um and then he got remarried and at the age of 82 he finally had his first child yep that's of biblical proportions yeah mhm yeah you know luckily he's he's from rashash Shiva so the usual Trope of how you're going to go outside and play ball with him is not going to be an issue because he wouldn't play ball with him if he had him at 25 either but um no the that's there's is that also aside from emotional issue yeah um that's why the H issue I I understand because you can always say you the T you could toilet it to this you could toilet it to that it doesn't have to be because of this maybe it's because of that you know but I'm saying today when science can tell you you can have children and you can't so now do we stick it out or not and just you know hope for a miracle or do we say J I'm sorry honey but you know well when a question like that you can only answer when someone asks you that to answer such a question yeah you know it's uh there was a story where the couple came to rakov and the doctor said they couldn't have any children could you give us a br he says what am I supposed to do you know anyway they come back years later they have they have a child so he says what happened say went to the Stifler he goes ah that's different what' you expect the story when the two of them were in the Russian army you know the story the target practice on chabas on chabas so they did it with a shoi yeah and the idea is you have to keep shooting to get the bullseye you know so each one of them is doing with Shino and they hitting you know the building outside you know and uh the Stifler like you know put it over his shoulder and blindfolded and pulled with his left pinky you know and hit the talking it says CH that was the story Yak told you know so uh um so what's so is there is there in this book for the childless or just explanations there's it's a it's a it's an understanding there's an understanding that the T deals with this isn't in the sense that there are other kinds of books of that people are m w it worked for them where this is how they dealt with it but you but it's an understanding that when says that an understanding of how created the world and what are the different ways by which directs the world so it's a safe for learning the why why do some people not have children so I don't I mean that's one of the three signs of so the I don't think was I don't think we H was yeah I think I mean what it's for example actually something very fascinating something from from the safer the Zar KES says something that peoplee were great yeah um had no children yeah yeah no didn't have children you know someone he actually people go to him with questions and someone one time said to him how can you answer them and he said I was raised by a great father that's how he said he was able to answer them but um for example K teach that the what that the um the Z says that contrary to what you might think s and were not redeemed their gate wasn't opened by right they didn't D doesn't say any right even though there's that says it but says very clearly and builds on that an entire Binion of how T changes the world and how a person's changes the world because when we learn T we're dealing with the blueprint of the world but the blueprint of the world that can actually change the world and through that once they were m g they created newas that then opened the Gateway by which they were then able themselves to change themselves to be able to have children or for example the isais he talks about she's the first person she went to a sadic to DAV and how but he explains why the isais was able to go to Alisha she herself was already sadus and it says her husband was a sadic he brings proofs to that and they went to Alisha and what kind of told Alisha not to DAV what because Alicia says I'm going to go and ask the king can I ask him for anything yeah she said rash I'd rather i' rather be with everybody else but then says she doesn't have she doesn't have a son and Alicia promises her one right and then she didn't seek him out for that yeah but then she goes back to him and what it means she goes back to him and how the if the but then she explains the interplay between Alicia and there's a whole interplay between the three of them expl how that what happened over there and why ultimately though there does exist a person who connects themselves to he was there's a person who connects themselves to the sadic on the level of Alisha on that way is able to open up a different gate of with that doesn't even so much require as just the sadic feel is able to do is able to do it because you're connected to that Gateway also even even without you know the someone gave me the shot many years ago I don't remember who because I have a terrible memory but um but my name is zve redond listen you know who to you know how to call 911 so anyway can I can I just tell the story for a second before you go on yeah when you used to give the sheer M shabas and sometimes M shabas you need a source right before the shear yeah because I Was preparing right up until the last minute yeah exactly so shabas we'd finish AB the phone would ring and my kids would all in units and say oh it's rabovsky calling well listen you know desperate times you know I I Was preparing right down to the wire because you know when I would say my par I didn't want to say what everybody said so I would look for a question that nobody else really talks about and as my wife said to me once if nobody talks about it maybe that should be a you know indication to you that you should pick something else to talk about cuz there's nothing there you know I'll never get one time when R was doing he says he says there's no Mahar there's no there's no you know he says even a boy scout needs a compass in a pair of box of [Laughter] matches it's such a great such a great line you know you need something to work with you know and uh and all the all the times I've done it I've often gotten aide from you that I was able to then build the shear out of but except once that I was M stuck I have no answer to this day I'll never forget it was Paras Mikes and it was shabas Kaneka and so I figured what am I going to talk about so I decided I would do a whole Riff on Kaneka presents and I would talk about the present that Yakov gave the brothers to bring to of course pistachios pistachios so one of the things it says and Rashi says the only place where it appears it's pistachios and I thought to myself why are pistachios zimos and I have no idea to this day I never found an answer I can't find anyone who talks about pistachios so uh I don't know we'll work on it it's just a mystery I'm telling you I looked I looked around and I can't find anyone who says of course you sing the praise of very about pistachios because the only thing I can say is today Israelis have gone crazy over pistachios so they come out like pistachio ice cream and pistachio yogurt and pistachio this so at some point you know it must have finally clicked in that way be Muslim mashiah and now the pistachios are coming back to the I don't know something like that you know what it is it's green or GRE I don't know I can't figure it out but uh yeah so um so uh come out like that but I remember hearing that um the reason you go to a sadic when someone is sick to DAV is because there's many considerations that a takes into account like the gar says if you're supporting aim even though you deserve to die will keep you alive in the of the right Bas sh won't but will he'll take those things into account that's why um lot was saved because eventually Russ would come from him and from that mashiah and so there were other considerations so if it sadic says to this will upset me me if the person dies so now says oh really you deserve to die but for him I'll keep you around so there's a extra aspect to it anyway yeah so uh um so but sik himself didn't get it you know what whatever the key was he never found the key MH you know so you start to say that so so why is it that some people are not to have children if it's not you know a direct owner I me it's based on it's that's what it means doesn't depend on depends on the and there's some people just in the same way why was I born and I grew up to be six feet tall and someone else is in gives each of us the parameters of our life and we live within that um says we can't change the masle even someone can change their masle so that does happen why you know look it's a it's aosi right could be it says we said but it's in you're not sure then just no one knows what's in them or yeah because no one even knows all the that's because they don't go to G just read the street yeah read the street sides but it says who didn't have children and but they kept my and that's why it's called I'll give them I'll give them a monument that's greater than and talks about that and explains what that means and why there are Ser in the chapter about that they do go through that do explain how he explains how that works and there's also the fact that the person he talks about this and it's not meant to be I'm not writing it as not writing I'm writing it as this is the structure of the T we have a structure of the T goes through the whole T this IDE of and shows the structure of how this works right um it's not as safer to sit down on shabas afternoon after the troll and on the sofa and read right you know it's a it's a safer it's meant to be learned but it's a safer that has that which is I should point out you know often deceptive because people look at an English safer and they say think it's an English book and there are that are written in English that have to be learned just like a safer whether it was written in lashes or not actually one of my friends is pushing me to translate the adaptation now into Hebrew it's like to trans take take sok and now translate back into Hebrew but because it's written in a in in an approachable way it can be learned in a whole different way yeah when wrote his r on the of women's so he same thing happened Israeli said we need this in Hebrew so he translated it back into Hebrew so it it's it's it's funny that when you find laav like there'll be a Broadway play that'll be made into a film and then that film is made into a play of the film adaptation so yeah so it goes back and forth so uh you know so the uh um the you know I I you know the gamar uh you'll tell me where it is I'm sure um where H somebody loses a teenage girl or younger and she never had any children and they all say how are we going to pay a Shiva call like what are we going to say so one guy says I'll say the he says you see kept Lo alive because Rus was going to come out of him so you could say that nothing was going to come out of your daughter so you don't have to feel bad says what kind of is that so he says part of the pain of losing somebody who didn't have any children is the fact that we think what's going to happen I had a neighbor in my my old building 35 years ago who lost a little child and she said two years old menitis and she said I think the most painful thing is thinking of what her life would have been would she have gone to school would she have graduated would you have had a job would you have gotten married would you have children and so thinking about all that so he says don't worry if there was anything that was supposed to come out of them then would have kept them alive so Vice does whatever they were supposed to do in this world they did and and you don't look at it from the point of view of what didn't they accomplish what didn't they have if they didn't have any children then that wasn't their tkit in this world you know so sarir who didn't have any children had thousands and thousands of children right just not biological like you said you know AA told no you know also called told us um when was a younger man in his 60s so he said my biggest is my biggest Mila because I don't have a family to take care of I could put all of my emphasis into building my Yeshiva you know now I guess he's going to neglect the Yeshiva a little bit you know he's in his 80s he's going to play with his kid you know what I mean you know go to he will I'm sure he will it's an amazing thing you know yeah it's an amazing thing I mean there was a woman in benra I don't know if you heard about this she was 80 and she uh and she had a baby was an amazing story what happened she donated to kuar ear and by mistake she pushed the button forar instead of so you gotta be careful here you know yeah power power it's lucky you never know but again but what what the safer does is at least it shows that the Torah has a framework the Torah has a structure right and there's a structure for what you're in and this is what it is what the end result is there's also he talk discusses that too right but and the end end actually is the CL with is also called and we're looking forward to the baress of turning into Reena right right right and he says the seventh AAR is itself and that's Mal that's leading to the final so we are called AAR now because because can't accomplish we don't have a mik there something M we can't do right you know so much of ourselves we like like like says we have we don't have a b mik we don't have so many mitzvas that we can't accomplish so most of our body can't find its completion by fulfilling the mitzah it's supposed to be able to do right okay so the rabbi alasi show audience knows that we only recommend uh top quality things here and I in fact we talked about rby greenwald's new book and I got a lot of email from people who told me that they went out and bought it and were very glad that they did so after everybody buys and Hashem remembered them what's the next project we can expect from Rabbi Z Redmond um there's um going to the show looking for I'm working for on two things you put out officially besides this um I was an editor on the tour sh the last half of youra from your name is not on it it is if you look in the yeah my name's there all right so if you want to buy a tour that's the standard tour that most people would ever most of my people go on tours they don't actually learn them but okay I put out three volumes in Hebrew on this right on theim this is the first actual book in English um I'm now working on two projects simultaneously I've been working on r on the on the months in the pric discusses what is the function of each month there's a whole thing there in the SE in the book of creation in early safer where he says each month has a part of the body and it's connected to a shavit and it's connected to all these things connection sok has a number of pieces at the beginning of each month part of it is very cabalistic and is ununderstandable and but there's a part that you can understand what is the aod of each month what each month am I supposed to be doing so I'm going to throw in my two cents and say you should also throw in the do I do little talks about it also right built it's basically built on talks a lot more than the there's a lot more than the yeah wow more than and um which safer is it it's in the prad it's there between the different pric is Accord because my daughter has a a thing on each month she puts out she's always looking for materials so so it's in between when you find the right para it's in between the paros it's over there for each month um I'm work what I'm working on that um also in English and now I've started actually working on show right based on and hopeful will give me and strength to be able to to get them and I have a talid who I'm not allow whatever who is very helpful in doing all of this and um I have a tremendous iarov to him I can't publicly acknowledge myaro only in this way but I do have to say cuz he wants to remain anonymous yeah I'll take credit I'm the one who's actually funding all these projects I'll get to check out I'll get to check afterwards I'll say yeah talk to that guy he he's my representative yeah anyway all right well and don't forget you know R Redmond has a weekly paraa and also Yanti um uh um Torah thoughts that come out all the time and uh look for that if you want to see um incisive and uh helpful um L that help you get a deeper understanding both of the in the par and I am a subscriber so I'm able to tell you that directly and uh and uh that's it for this episode uh if you want to find out more about the show you can go to my website ri.com you can make a comment you can sponsor an episode please we need sponsors where you we burned through all our sponsors already um you can sponsor a question and answer which we don't have this week so uh works out well because we don't have a sponsor either and uh you uh you can sponsor the Paran 5 as we begin our new year uh you can uh um submit a question make a comment and that's it for now until next time I am Dev olowski and I am Z redond and this has been the rabbi olowski show it's the rabbi orlovski show Torah and S ready to go the rabbi orlovski show knowledge and wisdom will help you grow lots of fun in every episode and we don't have to rhyme no we don't it's the rabbi orlovski show on rabi orcky.com Tor anytime you two and more it's Rabbi orovi show Torah and S ready to go it's the rabbi Orlowski show till next time till we meet again the rabbi Orlowski show it's the rabbi Orlowski show it's the rabbi Orlowski show