Episode 8 – A Positive Spin

[Music] hi my name is Deborah Orlowski and welcome to the rabbi roll-off ski show which comes to you every week through the magic of the Internet through a half an hour of time together which is interesting because I got an email from somebody who said a half an hour is just not enough time this should really be more time and then I got an email today from someone who said a half an hour is just the perfect time don't do any more it's just enough somebody else told me a podcast isn't isn't a half an hour podcast is supposed to be like you know 10 minutes 15 minutes you know half an hour that's already a show so just throwing that out there so it reminds me when I was diving for the ammad I was in one particular minion this is when I was saying Kaddish for my mother and and I asked the guy by how do I know if I'm doing okay and he says if five people tell you you're going too fast and five people tell you you're going too slow then you're doing perfect and that made me realize that if everybody tells you that it's going great then there's something seriously wrong and that by the way is a fascinating story maybe I'll tell it I have a little time yeah if the story itself is ironic on a lot of different levels but this this particular fella this particular rabbi was telling the story to his tell meet him about how he started a Hesed vibe when he was in yeshiva I won't mention the name of the issue he started off I said bud and after a couple weeks where she would sit how's it going and he says give Alec everybody's helping everyone's doing what they're supposed to be doing and it's terrific it's just great everything's great and he saw the receiver looked unhappy you know and and he saw him about a month later and he says how's it going he says terrible nobody's doing what they said they were gonna do and everybody's disappointing us and you know and the whole things falling apart I don't even know if I should continue it but she was said by Hashem Hashem when I told you everything was going well you weren't happy when I told you things were falling apart you were you were now you're now you're happy he says when you told me everything was going great you start a peasant vibe your whole purpose is the God they would do consent and the HR is no waste to be seen he's not trying to stop you as I try to slow you down I thought to myself it must be you are the HR you're the Attar and and I was gonna actually have my son leave the organization I was so so concerned now that I hear you having problems I know it must be going well because the ATO is trying to stop you in the game cos like you know this is the story the fennel turn as it turned out years later he really was the observer but anyhow it's just ironic but the insight remains the same and that is that if nobody's complaining that's when you have to be suspicious now if everybody says you're doing well that's when you have to get nervous yeah when no one says anything that's just apathy and that what we're gonna also maybe speak about a little bit this week but you know people have opinions people have opinions that's that's part of it I I once wrote a little post on this on Facebook about this idea and maybe we'll talk about it another time dedicated dedicated a show to that about opinions yeah but on the subject of opinions I know if it's really opinions or it's questions you know last week I talked about the the tuition crisis and I already received two emails from people with suggestions of how to solve it and I wish I was in charge of anything so that I could do this but as our show grows from the thousands hopefully into the tens of thousands and I have a bigger audience with which to be able to spread my wisdom yeah maybe I'll start doing this but there has been a suggestion that maybe after we have the show there should be a certain period of time where and we could answer questions so that if people want to submit questions they'll have that options so these are just some ideas that were throwing yeah like I said it's a work in progress this is the episode 8 of the podcast or of the half hour weekly partial insights that are also posted on the internet whatever you like and whether you're watching on tour anytime or on YouTube iTunes anywhere you listen to the podcast please subscribe yeah and tell your friends those of you who are social media savvy put this up on your on your whatsapp groups on your Facebook groups on your instagrams things pages you know those of you who spray graffiti on the walls you might want to do that I'm just kidding I'm kidding that's joke you gotta be careful you gotta be careful you know before a page that I was doing I was talking about how dom is such a central role I said you know yeah Adam is ie we put blood on the doorposts you know what I mean the Dhamma the bris Mila diamond comparison I said the the the the blood of the Christian child and Ahmad says you know and I look around and people are taking notes and I said no no that is a joke please please at the last meeting of the the Council of Elders of Zion we got lured that so we don't do that anymore these are jokes okay I just I have to go on record with this ya rabbee Chait who was shiva of cover time annette so he learnt bird Everglade boards and he saw there was a say for that quoted ribbed of it saying a particular shot and he's looking at and he says I was in that cheer that was a joke he said there's a joke and he wrote it down for real so you got to be careful gotta be careful yeah okay so so let's get down to business I'm still I'm still my thoughts that I'm sharing at this point although I do go off on tangents yeah but the thoughts for the most part I'm trying to have it linked to the partial and this week is parshas via a shave wherein we from here to the end of the story we are dealing with the dramatic story of Motor Co safe and when I say from here to the end of the safer I have to say from here to the end of time and this tension of Motor Co safe which rears its head in the asaru game Alice which rears its head and and other historical areas this this is a problem that plagues the Jewish people aoyama-san so we need to we need to examine every aspect of it and that's why I'm going to deal with one aspect that has nothing to do with it yeah because at the end of the story yo safe has charges false charges brought against him yeah and he is thrown into prison yo safe of course who has this me this a cane yeah you cannot keep him down he rises to the top wherever he is so him as a slave he becomes the head slave throw him at the prison house that prison comes ahead of Egypt there's no you can't you can't keep yo safe down yeah so yo safe becomes the head of the prison and two important people were thrown into prison into his prison and since he's in charge he's in charge of them one is sorry mosket and one is the south - the Royal Baker and the Royal and the royal drink Meister yeah they translate his Butler but it's not Butler he's the person who's in charge of the drinks the world bartender I don't know what would be an appropriate term for well that's his job is to be able to provide provide the drinks we don't appreciate this today I don't appreciate this today because we all live in areas where it is easy to get clean drinking water for the most part most parts of the world if not there are definitely the technology to make that possible that was not always the case yeah the BOK when he gives his famous header for white huh - can be used in coastal arts and he passes that way obviously it's my cousin come over but he comes out that way as he says because Eric I am is Tully either on wine or beer our lives depend on either wine or beer okay now to some people out there this will be very easy to understand our lives depend on either what if it what does that mean so very myzel Minh the Shiva Terrace Maya explained that because the water was so often contaminated you had to treat the water and one of the ways of treating the water was to make it into beer yeah in certain countries it was wine fascinating Barbara Tuchman the famous historian who was best known for her work the guns of August but she wrote a book called the distant mirror about the 14th century and she's describing one of the Crusades and they said one of the big problems was that they were running out of wine and that's what they drank they didn't drink water they drank wine that's what she described so i'm Yzerman suggests that the beverage that the liquid content of your diet was processed in by which which meant you drank beer beer was your your mainstay what you drank when you sat down to drink yeah and it would have been impossible to store up enough beer for an entire year so that if you didn't you know allow ha - people wouldn't be able to drink yeah I don't mean drink like drink I mean drink yeah depends where you put the emphasis but in any event that's the that's the idea of of drinking right so preparing the cup for pyro which was seen as a an act of nobility I don't know if this is appropriate to say that doesn't mean I'm not gonna say I'm just singing upfront I don't know louis xiv who was probably one of the most harsh of european martin monarchs in history had somebody who was responsible and a nobleman who and they would and they would fight for this position to be able to attend to his chamber pot i'm not going into any more details i'm gonna leave it at that you can go look it up for you you haven't defined this topic particularly fascinating but you know everything that the king did was to gonna Sheamus so the one who was there to bring him his cup this was a major deal he messed up he messed up because he gives him the cup and there's a fly in the cup yeah it was a flight you know which in vaudeville you know you're a how many jokes they were about that you know waiter there's a fly in my soup you know don't tell everybody don't want one - yeah wait what's this fly doing in my soup it looks like the backstroke yeah way - why's that fly my soup I can't help it if the cook used to be a tailor on and on and on there's these ideas but but he had a fine and and pyro like most Pyro's no tourists no sense of humor he throws the guy in prison and thus our alpha who was the official Baker and to be the Royal Baker or the Royal pastry chef or to be the Royal cook these were very harsh of positions yeah there are certain dishes that have been created specifically for Kings I remember reading about one of them I have never tried to make it I forgot what it's called I saw it once in a cookbook I was intrigued by it somehow you make french fries and when they're limp you drop them into hot oil and they pop and they become like a much larger penises this is something that happened once with one of the chef's had prepared it for the king and the king you know came to dinner late and they had turned limp and so he refried them and they popped I don't know the exact method I'm sorry those are you who are out there who are more who more of a foodie than I am we'll be able to be able to I'm sure explain you know you can feel free to post this on any of our sites where they were they accept comments but and just a quick word foodie is a new word ie my mother subscribed to Gourmet magazine a foodie is not a gourmet a gourmet is somebody who appreciates great food a foodie is somebody who appreciates food so he'll tell you the best dining truck to buy a hero you understand because it incorporates all types of food not just not just gourmet food I thought I would share that with you any of it so the baker brings him his his pastry bread whatever it was he bites it there was a stone inside of it and and power was very upset and he throws him to prison the two of them are thrown into prison and yosef is in charge and yo safe knows he's in charge of these guys he's supposed to be taking care of the prisoners even though their social status is much higher than his that's something that we don't really appreciate today especially those of us who are Americans but for most of world history there was a caste system there was an aristocracy and who you were and where you stood in society was extremely important when people took these things very seriously to this day in India it is still mokuba and many places that people in a lower caste don't disagree with people in a higher caste this this this exists there was a air Korea flight that crashed and when they examined it they realized that part of the problem was the culture it was Korean culture that went into it and that is that you since the pilot was of a higher social status none of the lower officers could contradict him and even though he was making a mistake that proved to be fatal nobody could contradict him because there's a high level so yo safe who is a Hebrew a Hebrew who was a despised person yeah and that's why it says the Rashi says later on the Egyptians would never eat with an every nonetheless he sees these two officers and he sees they're unhappy this is why you weren't happy so we had dreams so we can't interpret them yo sir says as it happens I have a little experience with dreams perhaps I can help ya now I don't know if it tells us about the desperation of these people that they were willing to turn to a Hebrew slave in prison Hebrew look slave accused rapist yeah for help or just because Joseph had this media of pain that he was able to reach out to people that people like them that's what the pain is pain is a very Ravenna clay boards the Russia shivering over time some guys were going out to collect for the yeshiva and they said give us a brook that we should be muscly uh he says I can't because everyone has free choice so I can't tell them that they should give you money but I give you a bracha that you should have shame I mean you have Fame so you know that there are certain people come and ask you for money and you're more willing to be accommodating than you are certain other people list certain people you like can you just you feel that you feel that that connection to them yeah so you all save had this me the self ain't this power to be able to connect and and so he said but some absolutely shared with him and each one of them tells him his dreams so first first this are Mushka goes and he tells him about his dream and yo safe tells him it's gonna be three days three days spyro was gonna call you up he's going to judge your case and he's going to return you to your position and so he tells the sound over this is what your dream means in three days you're gonna be judged by pyro he's gonna sense you to death right that's the story and he tells this arm ask him he says and when you're return to your position tell pyro tell power then I'm innocent yeah I'm a victim of circumstances these are the charges of false yeah not my fault none of this ever really happened you know and put in a good word for you with pyro after all I came to you aid I helped you out put your good news yeah and what's the end of the story the end of the story is that happened exactly as yo say said the saramakan was returned to his position - sir - was killed and the last puss ik in the parsha is Veloz or car sir have Mashka as yo safe-ish cafe oh he didn't remember him and he forgot him and the last part is follows Oh huzzah hamachi Maceo safe they use cacao and the sour mash come did not remember yo safe and he forgot him what's the K for Russian why are we repeating this yeah it's redundant it's unnecessary it's repetitious right so why why are we saying it again he didn't remember him he forgot him duh if you hook them and then you forget him so says the Med wish he didn't remember him and he forgot him what does that mean he forgot him it was an act of forgetting he actively forgot him remember forgetting is the easiest thing in the world I remember the time that I I was not a point but yet to forget something so easy to forget something just forget about it yeah so the Meldrick says he made us say that he's cafe you every day he would work to forget him so I mentioned him earlier I'll imagine again with nanoclay poets where she will come time ass on this meddra Sh I don't understand how hard is it to forget how to make a seder and forgetting and he says something that is so incredibly important so incredibly important you forget that there's a ASA Tove we're always talking with the HR and we're always talking about the force of evil and we're always talking about how bad everybody is in the terrible potential and all these terrible things but you forget that you also have a yet Toto you forget that you have a force of good in you and so the sire mask him wanted to just forget about you're safe but every now and then every day he would say you know the guy did you a toughie the guy helped you out he was there for you he had to work to ignore the fact that Yosef did this present for him in order to be able to forget about him this is so important because we tend to work to the worst aspect of people we tend to be mush spill everybody and look at how bad they are I don't get me wrong there's plenty of bad in the world and we talked about it many weeks we talk about problems but we forget the godless of people and we talk a lot about evil talk about bad things that people do we talk about it on this podcast we talk about problems that exist and how people you know do bad things and we know we know people are petty we know people are angry we know people are but we forget that people have a yeats are tough people are driven to do good yeah there was somebody who had learnt by I'm salivating and he gave it up and he went to Einstein you know and he saw I think it was a real Chabert I think it was and he says to him I cursed your grandfather every day so I don't believe in this stuff anymore I want nothing to do with it but what can I do he filled me with such a love for TOI Europe that I that I I just can't help myself just can't help myself you know I sit and learn I said learn I don't want it you know there are there are Jews who have been written off there's no hope for them no hope for them and then all of a sudden they do some act of goodness there's some there's some act of kindness we'll all of a sudden out of nowhere they suddenly wake up you know people have a tremendous capacity to do evil and the people do evil in this world but people have a capacity to do good we do ourselves and the world a terrible disservice when we ignore that when we do not see the good in people and in their ability when I say the good in people I don't mean the potential good people I mean the fact that they have a Yates or Tove and they're ready to do good they will do good they will help things we just we just don't see it because we're so busy looking at the negative you know it's a famous Vaart by pacer says when you when you burn the carpets you burn the the biggest comic kit along with it okay the feather it scooped up the the comments came encounter with the climate it was it was you know scooping up it was brushing the comets and the spoon the spoon carried the Karma to the continent why are you burning the candle yeah because a candle that can only find bad has no key well you looked at his the bed yeah that's a famous story a famous story with a blaze of silver who was in the DP camps after World War two and he came to help the hidden over there so while I was there he was making a make a minyan and he was he was trying to put together a minion and and he s this Yid would you come in down with us and he said I would never dove it again this is why he says because I was in Auschwitz and I saw somebody smuggle in a sitter and he used to charge people a half a day's rations to use that sitter for five minutes we were already on starvation rations do you know what it meant for someone to give up a half at the rations and this guy was charging people I have four-day rations in order to be able to to use that sitter after I saw that I said I would never happen again my blazes the silver said why did you look at the guy who was charging for the sitter why didn't you look at all the Yeadon who were willing to give up a half a day's rations just to be able to divert from a sitter look how precious Fela is we look at the bad guy look at the bad guy and we look at the bad things that they do when we we forget forget all the good things very few people are perfect in this world everybody is is limited some people more some people less you know and what do we look at we look at the floors I was a famous exercise where this fellow this professor gives the class this white paper with little blue dot on it and he says to him what do you see write down on a piece of paper what you see and everybody wrote down a blue dot and he said 99.99% of the paper is white and all you could see was the blue dot we're very good at picking out the flaws we see flaws we see the imperfections and people go dating today you know they're very good at picking out the floors now don't get me wrong I'm not talking about serious flaws but do we also see the good do we also see the side of the person that's good because there's people complicated yeah I mean I'm not even saying you should marry them look every wrong yet but do you see the good do you see that sadiq in the person cover time was in an inn and this burly Russian soldier comes in and he orders food and he's cursing in his acting disgusting and everybody is deeply offended by this Russian soldier you Jew and he says it'll come a time they said what kind of time he was in the end he says could you say something to this man the implication being like you know curse amount of existence you know I mean they're gonna come time goes over time and says what it's Sadiq you are all those years in the Russian army and you didn't convert and the burly Russian soldier started to cry and he said Rebbe you don't know what they did to me they took me away from my family when I was a small child they put me in the Army for 20 years they beat me they starved me to get me to convert they knew I was a Jew but I never gave up I knew I was a Jew and the harvest time was able to bring this person back I told this over once to a group of behind of him and they said what a great line like let me jot it down next time I made a big burly Russian Jewish soldier what at sadiq you are all those years in the Russian army no you remember that tell me the member yogaman Zack I need tell him go out and find what the best meat that is and it really has been her keenest says I in tove you know when I in tove is it means that the end of the sixth day of creation at the end of the sixth day of creation after other macapa have already sinned ate from the tree death has come to the world and he everybody is kicked out and kicked out of gunny then I like that's it the world the whole plan is messed up the r-la kim tov mode he saw it as very good that's an I ain't ov ient ov means that you see everything you can see the good and like I say that doesn't mean you have to ignore the flaws but if you only see the flaws the cup of time looked at this guy who everyone soars of Russia and he sorts I think the same person and they all had the same information he would never work on Kurdish who was using everyone knew about this this method of taking away children from their from their families and putting them in the army for here's everybody could have figured this out it's easy to be Movado they were left revolution Matisyahu and star of soccer videos yeah he said he says you know today the biggest guy is the one who gave me my bottle the most people and if you could Novato everybody can move Attica Dali Tori the more you can move otto the big you are yeah yeah but if you have to meet Devine Tove it means that you can look at the same thing and see but good the Sun I'm askin what would have been easier than to forget about Yosef but he couldn't it it bothered him it weighed him down the world's a complicated place well it's a complicated place what an wonderful exercise it is to be able to look at good I was talking to a guy about to go to out of town working Kirov he asked me the following question should I get divorced from my wife before I go or after I get there I said oh there are problems in your marriage what's this time you take logic oh there are problems in your man she says yes my wife's the worst person in the world terrible that I said tell me three good things about your wife and he stood there like this it was a very long pause and he finally said I can't think of anything I said and you're gonna go into Kirov you can't come up with three good things about your wife I can meet somebody on the bus and tell you three good things about him I said this woman who you had children with who you share a room with who who cooks for you and cleans for you and you know and doesn't want you can't go with three good things to say a matter I said just your anger and has so twisted your ability to see the truth it's such a good it's such a good experience try it look at somebody you know know and find three good things about him have a conversation with somebody and try to see the good in that person that doesn't mean that you have to be blind but the more that you look to find the good the good is there very few people in this world of black and white very few yeah Tamara tells us we're all bein in him every one of us is inconsistent in our behavior we have good parts we have bad parts the diligence inna and Ava is what you choose to focus on you have these people who are best friend they get into a fight and they say oh you're not talking them anymore no they're the worst person in the world and they did this and they did this and they did this and then at some point they make up I said friends with this person to the worst person in the world this is what do you mean they're so good they're so wonderful this is this they tell you all the great mylist both are true cuz we have bad parts we have good parts and we spend so much time talking about the HR I don't get me wrong the power of evil should be treated with respect but so should the power of good and just remember what Rashi tells us every the power of good is 500 times more powerful than the power of evil and the more that we can appreciate the good and see that in people and see that in the world and look for the situation well you can much find the good and the happier we're going to be in life and the more likely we are to be able to judge people favorably to be able to undo the cynicism that was became a part of clio from Akira Co safe and a mid-sized sham when we were talking that which the base of me this was destroyed for then a mere session will be so good to see an embassy gula and if you like to find out more about this show you can visit the website where we allow see.com slash podcast if you would like to comment on this particular episode it's rubber you're lucky that come slash podcast slash 8 because this is episode 8 hard to believe and if you want to find out about my future event schedule as I mentioned last week Chaves of december 14th and 15th i'm going to be in the good of Madison and the 7th 19th I'm gonna be in Florida in a younger zubaba and I have that week still some dates available so please contact every last that come slash events to find out about more things and if you like to contact rubber Lansky himself because I do bats my somebody said an eerie honest I can't believe it relapse qiyam self is answering that's what happens when you contact Raphael house key dot-com / contact you actually send an email to me and I can be posting ly offended I rent I can personally respond to your beautiful comments and their ideas so that's it and Mister sham will be here next week for our special Hanukkah edition of the rabbi Olaf ski show you don't want to miss that because it's going to be truly festive [Music]