Rabbi Don Jarashow speaking at Mishmar Parshas Toldos at Scheiner's Shul

Everybody, thank you for coming, for making the uh late night attendance at this wonderful show, a wonderful opportunity. Some faces I do know, some faces I don't. But either way, it's uh and thank you all. I and I hope I can deliver some words of >> Huh. >> My father, you're being you're being commanded to sit [clears throat] here. >> Yeah. So, um, quickly before we start, give me 20 seconds. U Rabbi Mr. Prager, maybe doctor, I don't know, asked me. Um, he saw on the flyer that I'm the founder of an organization. So, the answer is yes. Founded my organization called.org. You can check it out after this. It's spelled lic.org. Means how we followed Hashem in the midbar. when we were in the midbar and I founded this organization called which is essentially dedicated towards delivering inspiring empowering messages messages. We have a daily mus group we have weekly power show we have live so it's so that's pretty much it again le tic.org or you can look over there for more information. We have a weekly PowerShell publication. So that's uh and my I'm in the seat. I think I could plug my own uh my own thing. >> And every couple of weeks uh Dan's car is in the in the B. >> Yes, exactly. In the BET. So if you see it there, maybe like that as well. Okay, fine. [clears throat] Um I just came from I just came from a shul in New City. Um I forgot the name of the shaw but I spoke there for a little bit to the um I'm not going to repeat it but there is one ikuda one ukuda that I do want to um repeat over here and that's really to set the stage what I think is important in my opinion to discuss to bring to attention as you may or may not have known unfortunately there was a colossal tragedy that struck the greater my community this week there was a there was a young Yakov is Mayor >> Freeman. Um, tremendous tragedy on the tree. >> The tree fell on the car without the details. It's a tremendous tremendous tragedy lost to Israel. And just to just to repeat in short the point over there and how we'll uh we'll we'll we'll bring it over here. over there what we said earlier on which I think is important but we're not going to focus on that is that we spoke about the of the importance of and how when something like this happens it's uh it's it's the community it's the we can't let these things just slide over us like a wave we have to actually figure out ways take something tangible something very small if it's not going to be for the long term at least for the short term take something that's attainable something that's doable and actually make practical implement real change. So over there we discussed how in the beginning of the parash [clears throat] says here the howitzk stormed the shim and he was to children even though his wife was clinically barren she was she wasn't she was a she couldn't have children but the was unbelievable and he was able to even change the tea the natural course of the One can think that okay it happened over there. It happened in uh in Chestnut Ridge Abdu Forch. He was once a was once a businessman who came to the in Rahen and the businessman was busy he was all over the world and going to different countries and places and when he was in the presence of the expressed interest in knowing what went on about your whereabouts what's going on in the world and this businessman was a little taken back like you're the you're the you're the of to say for like what do you care about these trivial insignificant and the pushed and he said no no I I taken said I don't know something happened over here and over there he said no tell me something tell me something real something big something something and he said okay the biggest thing I could think of that I remember was on my on my journey on my in I was in China recently and it happened to me there's a big tsunami over there and and and tens of thousands of people were killed looked at this businessman and he said is in the entire world it's hidden even in China and you think that we're not meant to take something we're not meant to change ourselves the was telling us through that story that everything and anything that happens in this world we can never turn a blind eye and the was talking about something that in shim. What would we care about? But the but he cared. It's a demonstration of Hashem's lack of being in this world and we're meant to learn and grow and change from everything, every opportunity, everything in the world. Certainly when something happens in a community definitely is to tune into that and to see what we can take how we can change and again if it's not for long term sometimes we say ah it's not going to last okay so last do something at least for short term look what's in the par look what wants from us now and at least do that so this this year and any prayer and anything that change that hopefully does that we do inspire that we do ignite mayor and they should only know of >> and it should be for them. [clears throat] >> So I I came to my earlier today and how could you not stop at the ribbita, right? How can you not stop the ribbon to stop the rib? >> And I was very focused. I'm a and I don't come so often and I was focused on staying in that blue little strip and there's a lot of and I just wanted to make sure that I wasn't going to contract and in contact with any type of so I was just walking not listening and people were collecting and I was just like walking and trying to just get to the top. I want to get a hel and start diving. as I finally get to the top to the summit of the mountain to the caver to the to the to the t. So I take out exactly like this. I don't know. It's a Yeshua thing. I don't know. But to have a lot of things in your pocket, but like I had a whole slew of stuff over there. I pull it all out and I'm looking for where I was up to. I wanted to It was my bookmark. So I pull it out and as I'm doing that, as I have this whole entire thing in my hand, it was like this. This comes over and he says, "I'm collecting for you." I said, "I I don't I don't have any kind of money." And he's looking at me and I'm holding credit cards in my hand. [laughter] And he says, "I have a credit card machine also." And I said, "Okay, Bison and Chik," I said, "You have a credit card machine." As if I I wasn't, you know, I was I was trying to move on, get to the And of course, I gave him some money, but I took something more from that from that encounter. Sometimes maybe often in life there's situations where we have the goods, we have the means, we have the tools in our hand, in our capacity, under our belt. And sometimes we're just so spaced out. We're so busy, preoccupied with the bahalah, with the daily things that go on and we forget what we have at our disposal. We forget that we have the in our hands. Hashem is with us. We're in his hands. We forget that Hashem cares for our success every single step we take. And when things don't seem to be right, Hashem is still and what we have in our hands is the opportunity to always be to be always remember that Hashem is in our hands. And sometimes we forget we encounter life situations whether it's children all these things we all need. We're all this is life itself. This is the journey. And sometimes we forget that we have the in our hands and we're looking for here and we're waiting for him to call me and him to email me and we get confident that this is the guy and this is the Yeshua and this is the Askin and this is the Rob and he's going to help that doctor. Forget the is right there. We get so we get so we get so whirlwind the tornado of everything around us and we forget mish [clears throat] what's in our hands the himself and when we think about that we think that there's an we think that he has he has a plan he has the way he wants things to do and sometimes we want to deviate we want to think that we know better that we can do better if we stay in line with the divine If we stay in line with to his agenda, to his schedule, to what he wants, we'll be much better off. We better people. We'll be better versions of ourselves. [clears throat] Taking a step, people like to be bales, balabos, balabias. We're in charge. We're in charge of our house. in charge of our in charge of our our children. Then we start thinking we're in charge of our health. It's it's it's inevitable these things are going to happen because we're put in a position of being the babas. And what can happen sometimes which is a big pitfall which is what I want to discuss is that sometimes we talk and forget that there's a higher higher power there's on Hashem and we start making on a very simple level why should I learn one Mishna a day one blot a day few minutes a day it's only a few minutes I'm not going to do Anything more? Should I really go to million? Does it really make a difference? Does Hashem really know? Does Hashem really care? Said the dollar makes a difference. It does make a difference. There's so many people need it. My extra contribution. What happens is being in this perspective, being in the driver's seat, which we're not in. It's all but sometimes we get accustomed to this type of thinking and we start making bigger more executive decisions which we which there's caution tape around which we should not be making. That's a mistake which probably we often all encounter on different levels. I should embark on trying to finish. I'm never going to get there. So forget I'm not even going to start. What's the point? I'm never going to be aid. I should know. I'm never I'm not even can't finish all thing. Not make >> making is a big problem. Anyone who's the first person to make that problem? I don't about the first but one of the many probably. >> Who? >> Asa. >> Bingo. Thank you. As of Arasha, >> he's going to die anyway, right? >> I'm done. [laughter] So I set it up very well. >> Thank you. [laughter] >> Thank you. Thank you. >> I'll just elaborate on what these sadikim said. >> Shows you're listening. >> That's it. That's exactly right. >> Sorry. So we have the whole we have the whole encounter the whole back and forth about the said and the famous words his response was I'm going to die anyway what I need the whole thing for zakashi This was As's rationale. What's What's the benefit? What's it going to as we say? What's it going to do for me? Me, you transgressions. are in this in this in this in this mitzvah. I drink wine. So for me to have the it's so it's we're just not it's not happening and he said not only that but he took it really to the end and he said all this if I take the what's going to end up happening is it's suicidal I'm killing myself because I'm going to end up doing then it's going to kill me. So what do I what do I what do I need this for? I want to live life. I want to enjoy. So you ask a normal person, you ask anyone what they say, yeah, business business mind, he he made a good makes sense. So what tak did he do wrong? So what the problem with that was that he wasn't living as that he wasn't faking himself. He wasn't living a facade. He wasn't charade a walking walking mascot. That that was the big what did he do wrong? Because we know at the end that he got punished and Yak and that was the end of that was the the beginning of his of his fate of his demise. So what did he do wrong? [clears throat] The answer is he did exactly what we do and we have to learn from this. We know we're not supposed to learn right says that you're not supposed to learn that that you can learn even from par you can learn even from if there's something to learn for us and of course it's and we can learn even from say what was the big it's it's wondrous right theorah testifies that he belittled the but what's this big testimony of the he did something wrong we don't we don't understand it right he was very of because he didn't want to belittle it and he also didn't want to kill himself so he didn't want to be suicidal he seemed very he should be a therapist he's very in in line he wants to live good life he wants to be happy wants to be successful he didn't want to ruin his chances he gave it over that's the Very good. The words are so the beauty of the way he brings it out of a person. What defines? What defines is what defines is taking me out of the equation. jumping from the driver's seat to the passenger seat, the back seat, maybe out of the car and leave it all to holding on to the back of the wagon, but definitely not driving maybe a passenger and leaving it up to the even when it's cumbersome, even when it's heavy, even we have and we don't understand even if There's going to be and there's going to be setbacks and challenges and things that I don't understand. If you do not adhere, you do not you don't sign up fully, you're out. [snorts] It's you are being you're belittling, you're acting brazen towards the towards it's even if it comes with even it comes with questions with challenges delay he talks about that was their issue he says are afraid to step into the ro position of authority because they're afraid that they're going to there's and there's going to be kickback and then there's going to be you know with the This is what we deal with every single day. Every single moment of our lives, we say, "I'm not going to do A because this is going to happen. I'm not going to do B." We're constantly living in a state of fear. We're constantly running away from mitz from because we're always thinking of the repercussions. We're always thinking of Maya. We're always thinking about the future. And instead of living in the present, instead of living and embracing and making the best out of the now and leaving the rest up to the instead, we get into the driver's seat. We take over. We make the we think, "Oh, we're big strategists. We're big big. We're big." Hashem says, "I don't want that. I don't want you. I don't want you. I don't want your thoughts. Just listen to me and everything will be fine." That is yes, it was logical, but it was logical in the wrong place. It was misapplied logic. And from here we learn the mahus the of how is supposed to without thinking and getting into the nitty-g gritties and the technical what's going to be live the now is in our hands and everything else you look in your you take it all and there's tissues and there's papers and there's but the credit card the money it's the cash is in our hands and we can get so confused and so behold from everything else but just focus on what we have. We have the we have telling us what to do and just do it. Forget about everything else and focus. And it's so hard. And that was pitfall. That was of sin. That's how that's ultimately how he ended up going down in history as one of the greatest of all time. And we have to learn from that. When we submit and subjugate ourselves to the master plan, that's ultimately how we are going to achieve the happiest best of the hem that we can be. It's tonight. I just heard an incredible ma to wrap it up. I think it's so important. I heard this ma from There was, huh? >> Yeah. Video. So says to follow. So of it was the first night of Kaneka and he was standing by the and he was ready to light with the candle all the whole thing ready to go and as he's about to light he pulls back and he tries again and and finally he surrenders puts the candle and he calls over this very tall and he says come here and this is in front of the whole the whole audience on the bleachers however it was and this tall misha I think called the langa the longer he was a long tall skinny [snorts] and in front front of everyone in front of the entire in the mish he says he says do you love your wife >> so I don't know if they had mics two mics I don't know how it was over there but they've never seen anything like this before so maybe the reb is going losing it and the himself are so taken back, embarrassed, uncomfortable. And again, the Reb looks and says, "Maif, you love your wife." And [laughter] he says, "Okay, I guess I have to respond." He says, "Yeah, I I love my wife. How romantic." In the middle of the not understanding what's going on over here. And he thought he was done. He puts him back on the grill. He says, "Do let me ask you a question. How do you tell your wife who was known to be very short? Very short wife. He was very tall. She was very short. How do you tell your wife I love you? Now he really thought it's he says, "I'm sorry." He says, "Yeah, how do you tell your wife I love you?" And he said, "Well, if you want to know exactly," he says, "I go close to her." And I say, "I love you." He said, "Yeah, but you're very tall and she's very short, so maybe she doesn't hear you sometimes. So, how do you make sure that she hears it?" >> How tall was the guy? >> Very [laughter] sounds like >> 86 and she was 39. Exactly. [laughter] And he said, "Well, I have to bend down [clears throat] and tell her I love you." And the Reb pressed again and said, "What happens if she still can't hear you?" And all the are waiting. Where on earth is this going? What is up with Kaneka? [laughter] And he said, "Well, in those situations when I'm bending down and she still can't hear me, then she'll have to go on her tippy toes." With that took his lift, went back to the >> and he sinned. He lit. Obviously, there was bah. There was utter confusion that permeated the entire bismish. The went over to the Rebba after and said, "Reb, what on earth just happened? We've never seen anything like this." And he said, "I'll explain to you." He said, "As I was lighting, it struck me. I got very nervous. I had some spikus in my mind. I'm about to do a mitzvah as we're getting closer to is already in the air. as we're getting closer to Kaneka as as as I'm about to light the I started hanging the suffic that I'm about to be in the and it's a way of doing his mitzvah his of making happy through our mitzvah we're bringing him and I started having it's like is is he going to hear me is he looking at me is he counting my mitzvah and he said then as I'm lighting I'm like you know what I thought about you my and I wanted to hear from you. What happens when there's distance between you and your wife? Cuz the aister loves us just like a husband and wife. We're the Hashem's Hashem's. And when you told me that sometimes you bend down, then I thought to myself, okay, it must be that sometimes the when I feel distant, he bends down as well. But when I still wasn't sure that there might be distance, there might be a gap and I wasn't sure that's going to get filled. I pressed you again and you told me sometimes the kala your wife she has to go on her tippy toes and that was a for me too that even if the abish is coming down and there's still a gap I just have to go onto my tippy toes and then hashem could say I love you. The same thing is for us every time we sit down and learn. What are we doing? We're connecting. We're plugging into the power of powers to the highest level of power itself. Sometimes there's a disconnect and we want to do the right thing. We want to adhere. We want to we feel who am I? What am I? Does Hashem love me? Does Hashem know me? There's two things to remember when it gets lost in the shuffle. When we try to tap into the when we take out everything and things are falling upon we don't remember. We have the money in our hand. We have the key. We have the gold in our hand. Alf is that the is bending down. The cares he's there. And number two, if you still feel distant, go on your tippy toes. lift yourself up a little bit, a little remind yourself, that Hashem does care about me, that I'm that I was put in this world for a reason. And then you'll hear Hashem saying, "I love you." You hear Hashem saying, "You're great." You hear the echoes and the murmurss inside saying, "You have selfworth. I need you in this world. I need you to do more. I need you to do better. I need you to fill my world with glory, with greatness, and sanctify my name. The me of Asov never ends. The thoughts, the hesitations, the reluctance to jump in is constantly going to plague us. Always going to push us down. But now is the time to be kazak. Especially when there's tragedy especially when there's calamity especially when khali saw there was a carbon taken from our city to come back with vengeance to come back with a roar and say I know I can do better I know I can do more I know hashem loves me and even in the pain even in even in tragedy and there's a bigger picture and I don't understand but is in my hand I'm never going to forget that and when we feel that gap we feel that distance which is definitely a general feel that we all have now when we feel that distance let's get on the tippy toes behaz if it's our ding if it's our learning if it's our if it's our whatever it is and say I know that every little thing is to make a difference and when the need of as creeps in and says nothing that's say I'm not thinking about I'm not thinking if it's going to last I'm thinking about right now I'm going to make the world a better place I'm do I'm going to be mim and dom right now because that's what I know wants. He's in me. He's in my hand. He's in my pocket. He's my He's everywhere. I'm going to do that. Not worry about anything else. And in that we're going to be we're going to we're going to push away and hopefully destroy and annihilate the as of the within us. And hopefully together as we come sooner closer to the we'll light up with we'll light up. will get closer with the of and we should only hear of the Amen. tax. >> [clears throat]