Rabbi Daniel Staum Mishmar Parshas Vayera at Scheiner's

Okay, appreciate the opportunity to be back here again. Let's see the name. >> I also want to dedicate this year my grandmother, my father's who's here tonight. Appreciate it. To my grandmother's yard site is on chabasaly. Continue to have an aly. Thank you. >> So, I was flipping through my notes in preparation for for tonight. wrote from many years ago and I saw a ver I wrote there that I heard it on the telephone from Fuyer who was my RV who was here in fore for many many years and um I called him up called called him up he actually also from Ben Raul um so I called him up to share with him the ver that I heard from him and I had written in in the thing that I had written forgot which rebro but I wrote a question mark on top he said no it's from the scalen rebar hearing it from him in Yeshua Spring Valley. It was a big mid and he spoke over there. But anyway, this was the part that he said, I I wanted to share about a certain theme. But before my Rabbi Wal would say that every rabbi likes to say a few words before he speaks. So before I get to my main topic, I want to just share a couple of brief thoughts from the beginning of the par. One of them is this from Fer that I heard from him. The say that was sitting outside. He was sitting by the doorway of the tent which literally means like the sun of the day like the heat of the day. Now that's funny. Why would it say instead of in the heat of the day? Why would it say like the heat of the day? So he quoted from the now I know from the rebel that the sun is a symbol of consistency tells after that it will never stop. It talks about the sun the the weathers the uh the seasons that will always be. So the sun is a symbol of consistency. It's there. Sometimes we don't see it because of the clouds but it's always there on third day after the at that age and advanced age after an advanced procedure should have been relaxing especially in that heat but he wanted to he wouldn't he wouldn't let it go. So that was that's he was like the heat of the day just like the heat of the day just like the sun is always there that was the consistency I was thinking this is in my notes from I was thinking 20 years ago when when he said this that maybe that's what we sing in this morning praised praiseworthy are those who wait for the double reward and we end off an inheritance and and the restfulness Like the sun shines on a person that who is za maybe that the piton is saying who is z to the to the inheritance to that resting of shabas resting meaning the spiritual rest of shabas if one waits for itsh like the sun with consistency that a person lives their life always waiting and yearning for shabish maybe that's part of the idea also based on this uh this same thought and when I when I when I said this before this week so he told me oh says it's interesting in paras when the Torah talks about the sun it calls it the first time it doesn't call it shamish or sheish what we call it shamish the first time the that word appears is in last week's para by the absur hashish or bo it's actually or when the valki there are few a few sometimes it's sometimes it's and it's because one means in the past and one means in the in the present one means in the in the in the past um anyways but it says so here it says the sun. So the mash says because the sun is such an incredible being, it's so powerful that it looks like its own entity. In fact, they they served it as an auda. I wouldn't I wouldn't worship I wouldn't worship diamonds or whatever. I would worship the sun. It's a powerful thing and it's consistent. That's right. He said so though by the brisman absuru who lived his life calling out Hashem he said but by the brisman absur that's when the sun could be called she because then it was clear to the world that it was shamish it was there to serve and it wasn't there for its own so I wanted to share that this week um because I spoke to this week um two other quick thoughts in this place called the plains of mam the plains of Mamry. So Rashi says what's this place called the plains of Mamray? He says who should also know um apparently tell us that he asked he had his three inner close friends on Eshkol and Mam he asked all three of them what they thought whether he should seemingly we'll get in a second he asked them about the brisma and honor and esk said no and mamry said yes so therefore it's called a lon mry because mamry told him to to go ahead with it but the question is Yeah. The question is is that possible that really asked did he say should I do the champion >> afterm that's that's the question that all are busy with how is it possible the champion of the champion of listening to thee and says do and he says well you think I should do it you think I should listen to Hashem can't be so there are many many many ideas that are said beautiful ideas I just want to share a couple the das kingdom says And his words are think that that he was asking whether he should listen or not. So first he first he says the question that he asked him was should I do it in public? Should I do it in public or should I publicize I don't if you do bris in public should I publicize that I'm doing a brisma the people should know maybe I should keep it quiet and unknown said yes keep it quiet said no you have to be fearsome this is what I'm doing >> not that should I do public right correct that's the first says the second says which is a great lesson is asking them what should I do commanded him so everybody in his family everyone everyone has to have a so what should I do are people that don't want to do it. So underco said I don't know I don't know what should you do m said you do it first says the dasan you go ahead and do it first that's leadership by example if you do it first then everyone will follow it's also another a beautiful idea from but the kasuni says I never heard this before this was the first time I saw it that he says of course was not asking their advice he actually was testing them I [snorts] once uh I read a cute little story about a fellow who was in an museum, one of these fancy, I don't know names of all these, you know, fancy, you know, expensive art things. And um, forgive my ignorance. And he's standing there looking at them and he's just grumbling and grumbling goes one to the next and he goes over to the director and he says, "These are junk. These are garbage. My four-year-old can draw better drawings than this." So the director starts laughing and he says, "Look, my friend, these paintings are not on uh question over here. They already have been determined by many great and and professional and and and and you know people who know what they're talking about that these are from the best paintings in the world. >> You're the one that's on uh that that's that's up for debate right now. But you're saying that they're stupid. It shows that you're stupid. You don't know anything. It's not because the paintings aren't good. It's because you don't know anything about art. So the the says that was not asking whether he want he should do the briso. There was no question that Aravino was going to go ahead with the risma. Aravino wasn't wanted to see who is loyal over here. Who are my real friends? So he asked on and they said not so sure said death. He said m says a you should do it. Oh that's my guy was had no intention of not doing it. He just wanted to know who was loyal together with him. Okay. I wanted to share um for the rest of the year a theme. Yes. a theme that interestingly um goes through a lot of the para very powerful important idea. So it comes up in a few different places. First of all we'll ask a few questions and then we'll get back to the idea at the end. the beginning of the par we know everybody knows that was sitting outside in the blazing hot sun was whatever that means he took the sun out of its casing and there was no no protection no ozone it was just blazingly hot and sends in three of course the question is if wants to help him out why don't you just put the sun back in his case and then make it you know regular hot and then uh guests will come inevitably and you don't conserve them. What's his business? He has to send mal. He keeps the heat. It's still blazingly hot, but he but he but he he sends he sends these three on >> the heat was an aspect of right. >> Yeah, but I don't know if it had to be that hot. It says that it seems to be that it was above well above and beyond. >> This also shows a above and beyond. But when it's nice one second then you have turn the video around. You're going to have to give this year. Hold on. No. [laughter] Don't give away the the No, he's so easy. He's very [laughter] hot. That's the big deal. >> There we go. That's my whole sh Don't give it away. Another dream. [laughter] >> Later on daddu tells him it's possible. I'm not going to tell and he tells he's going to destroy Saddam and Araminu goes to bat against these people who are his like utter nemesis. I mean like these are the people that stand against everything Arainu stands for. and he starts bargaining with I I told my students to keep them keep them involved. I said, you know, ask at your Shabas table this week, where does football come up in the par >> 50 45 30 20 10 those who don't know about football not going to know what I'm talking about, but okay. [laughter] >> So, >> I don't watch sports. I I'm not from that kufino. >> See, even [laughter] goes to bat for he keeps bing. It's amazing. Lastly, tells him we quoted in the you should know your children are going to be strangers in a strange land and they're going to be enslaved and they're going to be it's going to be difficult. They're going to be afflicted for 400 years. Doesn't say a word. Why does it say maybe 390, maybe 380, maybe if we can only be there for 200 years, 100 years, maybe it shouldn't be so bad. Nothing doesn't say one word. He just accepts it. Why doesn't he goes to bat for Saddam, but he doesn't go to bat for his own children. What's the later in the parenu gives birth to an incredible incredible event above nature of course say not only she couldn't have children she didn't have the physical capability to have a child in the first place she was an islandist she wasn't just an she didn't have a womb wasn't the whole thing was beyond so the weash there's this week's par because both days of rash is the is the from paras So which literally means made me a laughter anybody who hears will laugh for me. So Rashi says it's a lotion of anybody who hears will be happy for me. But it's interesting he uses a lotion of of is there another meaning besides of course what Ashi says. And finally, one last question at the aada the epic epic which we're still nurturing yearning you're drawing from the uh from the of the as we say every day and of course in Russer tells him and then he turns and there's a there's an aisle there's a ram that's caught in the thicket by its horns and takes that and brings that as a carbon Shapiro asks how did you know that that wasn't my how did he know that that is really that he was meant to bring it that was so it was so posh to him that he brought it right away without even thinking twice about it so these are the uh the four questions for tonight was a study done in March 2012 Daniel Openenheimimer students were shown two different two different uh writings two different papers one of them the font was very unclear. One of them the font was very unclear. The other one was a very clear font and they I don't know how they did the study. When they studied afterwards who remembered it better and the results were counterintuitive because those who had the paper that had a very fuzzy font remembered it I think 14% whatever the number was they remembered it better than those who had the clear font. Don't try that if you're trying to sell a book. But the reason is because you had to work. They had to work harder. They had to squint. They had to put more effort in. That little bit more effort had more staying power. It helped them to remember it much better later. We know the says easy come is easy go. In the yeshivas everybody knows in the yeshiva world. So arts girl is a incredible thing and it's revolutionized and it's unbelievable. I tell my students sometimes I remember I remember walking with my coming into sh with my father because memory when I'm 13 years old and um it some we're having conversation about the art school mnas how amazing it was and I think my father said to someone else he said you know art school is putting out a gamoras and he said no way said yeah [clears throat] I'll tell you they're putting out a gamora this must have been 1992 1993 I think around but you would think it was in the 1800s cuz they did it so fast they're done with Bavi they're done with It's incredible. But in the yeshiva world, in the yeshiva world, it's uh the try to discourage it. Why? Because yeshiva bakar has more time and more ability and this is the only time in your life you'll have that time and ability. You have to work. You have to work on the on on the learning and and the more because the more effort a person puts into it, the more it stays with a person. If a person takes easy and they just relax and you know, so easy come easy go. That's the way it is with with everything in life. says the toil of your hands when you will eat it [snorts] the effort when you put in the toil when a person works hard you'll have from it it'll it'll it'll stay with you the the the said over a story that he heard from the he said there was a a boy who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth as the expression goes tremendous amount of money and he always had exactly what he need he was getting older his father was getting a little nervous from him. Spoiled kid. So the father um sent him off. He said, "No more." Every day he gave him a he had a wallet. Every day he would put money in the wallet. He said, "No more putting money in the wallet." He said, "I'm sending you off. You go make a make some money. Come back at the end of the day and I want you to bring me a few gold coins." So the kid was not used to working at all. He was having a good time and he was running around the end of the day. Uh-oh. He goes into his mother. Mom, I need a few gold coins. I have to go into Tati, you know. So she gives him goes into the father. gives him a few few you know few gold uh gold coins or dollar bills whatever it was few bills father takes it shucks it into the fire behind them throws it into the fire kid thinks to himself that's weird same thing happens the next day and he plays around messes around the whole day comes to the mother at the end of the day I I have to she gives him and it happens every day for a while finally one day he comes to at the end of he comes to uh at the end of the day and she says this is it I got no more tomorrow I don't have anything else to give you. So the next day he knows he's in big trouble. So he runs around and he starts trying to he doesn't know anything about making money and people have raman give a little here, a little there. By the end of the day he comes up with just a little bit and he's exhausted and he comes home and he hands it to his father. His father takes it, throws it into the fire. THE KIDS NO T [screaming] NO and jumps into the fire and grabs it out. And the father says, "Now I know that you worked for that money because every day when you had it easy, I knew you weren't working for it. Somehow that money came easy. So I threw it into the fire. I don't want you to have that money. But now because you worked for it, you weren't letting it get away so fast." When a person works for something, then it stays. heard a story that when Elian came to speak in Lakewood guess in the early years by and it was a very hot day in in the in the yeshiva was before air conditioning and um was an old man and turned to him and he said then maybe can I get you a drink of water he was in the middle of speaking and rebellia without you know without he said Lord, he said a person is born to toil mean just cuz I'm thirsty I'm hot whatever he said kept speaking >> he didn't realize and he turned he saw Aaron had his head down on theender and the way I heard the story was they they saw like a little little bit of puddle like [snorts] he was crying a lot and got very nervous and he said WHAT DID I SAY HE SAID you said the learning comes to me Baron was brilliant said I don't know what it means real amus he was crying from the that he doesn't have the ability to you know to do realis getting back to the question at the end of the para how did know that this was real that this was from Hashem and it wasn't so in the imas which is a collection of Shapiro's so it says that when he became of lublin so he asked whoever whoever the heads of the community were. Was there any opposition when they hired him to be the RV, was there any opposition to my becoming the RV? And they said, "Yes, there was some." I mean, probably he was overwhelmingly chosen, but yes, there was some. He said, "Okay, good." He said, "Because if there was no opposition," he said, "Then I have to be nervous." >> The Sultan doesn't let things go easy. And Shapiro said, "I'll bring you a ria." He said, "How did I know this question?" He said, "Because it was caught in the thicket. If it was my Satan, he said Aramina would have turned around and there it would have been ready to go. But because he had to go and pull it out and take it and he had to un unhatch it from there. >> He had to work for it. >> He had to work for it even even somewhat. He said it wasn't he knew it wasn't my Satan because that's always the Sultan makes things easy for us. The path the Sultan is always going for the path of least resistance. He always wants things to be as easy as possible. >> You could also ask where did where did it come from? It could have been next to neighbor's ram what right >> you could have used right who says it was an animal that >> okay >> the answer it wasn't there when he came it was an empty field there's nothing there >> there was nothing there it was arena I'm saying there was I mean not arsenia it was it was heer yeah so he didn't see it so obviously when it came he knew it came from >> okay could be could be um they could do says Why did not put the sun back in his in its case and not let it be so hot? And he says because wanted to do on the highest level. That was part of it. He didn't want to just do when it's easy. When it's easy. Anybody can do when it's easy. When it's hard, when it's a challenge, when it's a struggle, when you have to sweat, when he wasn't feeling well. That's what wanted. I heard a story um from a close to um so a close to his told me >> here in my >> so he he he came into a house he came into a parlor meeting they had a parlor meeting for the yeshiva you know they usually do it in a nice house and uh Rdon was already an older man and it was the middle of the winter and it was muddy and he had boots on and he came into the house and it was a very nice carpet in the living room and he bends down he starts pulling off his rubbers and the balabias comes running over he says nay n rashisha scoot and if dun said to him I'm not only taking it off because whether you want me to or not I'm also taking off I don't want to be that guy who walks across somebody's beautiful living room and doesn't care >> for me also I don't want to be that type of person well that's a that's a way looks at something but by au it's not just that it's just not just for you I want to be I want to go beyond myself. I want to do I want to go beyond myself. So didn't want that understood wouldn't want that. He just puts the son back in and then regular guests come. He wanted to be able to do it when it was particularly when it was difficult when it was a challenge. the >> right >> I told forgive me those who don't know anything about sports but I think it's a it's it's a it's a fear it's a fair point >> I apologize [laughter] >> no no I'm sure other people are also talking what are you saying but I'm in a high school so but I I I told my students that's the only reason I follow I don't really care for myself just I have to know what's going on but uh this year the Dodgers won the World Series What's that? >> Yes, [laughter] the it was I mean for for for anyone who's not a Dodgers fan, which is most of the world, um it's pretty painful, but for Dodgers fans, it was it was an incredible victory because it was such a hard battle. It went to the final game, went to game seven, and one of the games went to I think 18 innings and and the Dodgers won. And then in the game six, they came back at the very end. And in game seven, in the ninth inning with one out, they were losing. >> [laughter] >> But the bottom and then and then they won in extra innings the the fact that it was so difficult. That's that's the that's the excitement THAT'S THE THAT'S PART of the gishmak you know. So deal that's the same thing of Schmo Burbound that's he says this he doesn't say about the Yankees he doesn't say about the Dodgers but uh but I will tell you someone told me Burbound one time saw on the back of for those who remember back in when cereal boxes used to have athletes eating them so he said someone told me someone said that he said that Burbam said he had three cautious I don't remember all three he had three cautious on it he saw it one morning he said I imagine it was a man if he was he wouldn't have seen it but he said I have three cautious is number one he said his his his knowledge base is in sports. What does he know about cereal? He said number [laughter] he said number two he likes it. So who said I'm going to like it? >> I forgot what the third costume was. [laughter] That was the three. He said it's part of a complete preference not >> I don't know >> of another just another friend of mine told me because you see they go like the way they think some friend of m told me he was driving a ruin they think of >> no but also like you go trains you had a thing he he told me he was driving a breain fee and there was a sign there was a billboard a billboard I said this once there was a billboard that said the let's say I don't know the 2000 Lexus the best ever >> the best ever >> so Ruin said to him he says what is that what does that billboard mean? Does it mean the 2000 Lexus is the best that the 2000 Lexus is the best Lexus ever? Or does it mean that the Lexus is the best car ever? Namino, if I have a 1999 Lexus, [laughter] if I have an Lexus, so if the 2000 Lexus is the best Lexus ever, I have to get a new car. But if the Lexus I already have a Lexus, a good My friend told me, he said, Shiva, I I don't know, [laughter] >> but he tells me the way a god will think. They say from they say allow shabas to throw the ball >> a basketball >> basketball said I don't understand why can't you do it before >> yeah put it's better [laughter] so he had right the nice was they said what does it mean basketball they said you have to get the ball in the basket he said better before shots put it [laughter] >> about the story with the way I heard was that he said that this is this is against who says that I think it's the bad just cuz You said this. I think it is. >> Okay. Is that good? >> That's what I heard. >> So does say he says about a person who loves mountain climbing. Imagine you tell the guy, "Look, come today. I have a helicopter. I'm going to take you to the top." He's not going to be happy with that. The whole vert is the is the struggle is the is is the pushing myself against to have the endurance to be able to climb the mountain. That's what the that's where the feeling of is. That's what that's where a person feels that they've accomplished. That was the of constantly ready to to to give up everything for Hashem. Why does why does not form >> so winefeld in um in his newer that came out of his collection of his dras timely and timeless very good beautiful he said that understood see the people of Saddam they were showing they're not going anywhere so it's a question of destroying them or not destroying them I'm sorry goes to bat for them maybe you know but when it comes to when it comes to Israel when it comes who says that is going to have to go through things in order to understands that's the price. You can't go to the promised land. You can't become the chosen people unless you go through the travailes before. So it didn't necessarily have to be as horrible as mit was means they'll be afflicted. It could have could didn't have to be. No one said it meant that putting their children into the walls that they'll get beaten to death didn't have to be that bad necessarily at that point. Said it's going to be hard. Vino understands it's going to be hard. That's what it is. That's the price to pay if you want godless. Yeah. In fact, and that's that was that's my next point. Where do we find that is called au is never called that in the Torah. It's in the mission in the fifth parasu was tested with 10 tests. Interesting because if you count up all the different they show them have different counts of the 10 tests. If you count them all the different ones up it's like 13 14 maybe 15 16 that could be counted as tests that different different count as tests amazing but what Abrau went through what's that >> 10 categories >> no it's what you count that what are considered tests and what are not some people can this fascinatingly it's not my topic holds that the 10th test is not it's mis next week's par which is a little bit shocking but also that's its own that's its own that's its own but says that when DOES BECOME THAT'S when he became a venu when he withstood the tests what does it mean to be a father a father gives gives certain things to his children it's in the genes it's it's it's in the DNA it becomes part of them au instilled people ask many of them many people as far as au was pretty impressive but I mean it was incredible but still how many aos did kaliso give over the years they say that's the only reason that was able to the only way was able to to to to to do that is because Abrau had trailblazed because he had given us that ability by his msesh. So now everyone else who followed suit throughout the years it was the of that's where he's called that's where he's called by the tests when a person overcomes the challenges that's when he becomes that's what made him I think this week was just yesterday two days ago was the yard site of a lot of yards now of course was he was such a a legendary inspiration for anyone to meet him. I remember I I didn't hear him speak too many times. One of the times I heard him speak, he was talking about how a person has to be about life. He said even if a person has him just to be alive and if I remember correctly, he couldn't finish. There were certain times he couldn't talk. He was talking about the just being alive no matter even if a person you know no matter what a person goes through and he couldn't even finish the but that's the way he live. They say a mis that one time he got up at and he couldn't talk. He wasn't able to speak that day and he he he got up. I don't even know if he got up. He was a mantle with the words on it and shaking hand he pointed. He pointed word to word with a big smile on his face and that was his speech. >> Couldn't talk. But his inspiration there's a picture I have it on my wall. It is it it it speaks volumes. There's a picture of lighting kic if anyone's seen it and he has one hand with the candle and the other hand his other hand is holding his hand and his teeth are gritted like this that grit that determination it took the mirror yeshiva from already a somewhat large yeshiva but like more than doubled it from 2,000 3,000 4,000 5,000 but he remembers the story that my friend said over three houses ago about the person who came to I didn't prepare it I just it came to me now I'm remembered it so I don't remember all the details. I'm I'm sorry. But uh he came to me and he had a whole plan um of how he was going to learn certain things in Russ. So he said, "What about the rest of shas?" >> So he went came back and he had another plan. He doubled it. Whatever. Said, "What's about the rest of Sha?" The fellow was in his I think in his 70s 70s, I think. >> So he finally came back with another plan, a 14-year plan, you know, and Russ said, "That's a plan." He said, "Rebby, I'm going to be 94 from [laughter] so he said it's not possible." Nui said is is if was a member of a friend's voice shook um Metlife he said and I'm able to do WHAT I DO LOOK AT ME and the words look at me just like reverberated through the stadium but that was the godless it was the it was because he suffered so much and he pushed himself so much that he became such an inspiration seeing you see gdole who were 30 40 years older than him who who had such covered for him because uh you know what he accomplished It's it's an amazing thing. And I'll end off there's a there's a book. It's a it's a lecture. It was actually it was by a fellow named Randy P. Randy Posh. He uh he passed away and he was dying at the time that he gave. It's called the last lecture. It's quite inspiring. Makes you think a little bit. And it's from uh Kobe. I I probably mentioned this quote also because I I think it's very powerful. >> Before he died. >> Before he died. Yeah. Well, he gave the speech before he died. Yeah. And but he said there a line I I remember in the book at one point he got pulled over. He said it was a beautiful day and uh he had the he had a convertible and the top was down and he said it was a great day and you know he got pulled over for a cop for speeding. He said honestly officer I'm dying. I don't really care about the ticket but uh you know [laughter] but um but he said a line that's such a powerful line. He said brick walls are there not to keep us out. Brick walls are there to show how badly we want something. Brick walls are there to stop other people who don't want it badly enough. The question is how badly do you want it you know and that is the godless ofu that is the godless our whole story. It's a godless that's a story of klis so many troubles so many travails so many vicissitudes so many challenges and uh you know we're you know loosening our ties a little bit this week. It's uh it's been a it's been a nerve-wracking week week for Kali. We don't know what's going to be, but we take in the fact that we didn't never know what's going to be. And sometimes we think we know it's going to be and we don't. There is I mean it's much to me it's much more clear now than it was 5 years ago. Even though it's a little scary, but somebody's pulling the strings up there. Knows exactly what he's doing. And it's just so clear. I mean the fact that that that this fellow was was elected. I mean it was I mean everybody went crazy. But uh it's it's it's it's un it's it's unnerving. But the word and things are things are difficult. You know, there's a there's a line that I heard um years ago when I was in I think Israeli soldiers sing it. I heard it comes from Cook. Very beautiful words. The eternal nation. We're not afraid from the long road. Is on the long road. It's a long road. We want things uh we want things uh now. We want things to be clear doesn't work by our schedules. He has his own but we're the children of and uh will persevere and their children will persevere and will be to great things together to see to witness the great things that are coming and we'll be within our own lives to overcome challenges and struggles to continue to become the great people that we are.