The Deep Spaces of The Torah - Parshas Nitzavim Vayelech - Blue Ridge Mishmar

That was I want to thank for for again organizing and putting together. I appreciate I appreciate our people coming together to learn over the summer during the year there times that we can't meet. It's not always the most consistent in the world. There's a certain time to have a friend obviously not excuse always want to talk to our friends all the time. We all have friends. They have some friendships that we don't get to speak to in a regular basis. We just appreciate each other. for real friendship. The friendship is not because we're always together. We have a friendship and we want to always be together. The closeness is just there. I want to express that I just appreciate it's like a finisher. Usually a shared like this we miss too often. She just like dissolves. But we actually like each other. It's nice to work together like it has just nice. I'm not going to say I want to be let it not miss and try to be more consistent for sure. That would be the best thing. We can't always control whether the past things things things that we all have things in our life. I want to express I appreciate together before studying the study parish just a pleasure specifically tonight opportunities just a very precious time it's a precious time a wonderful month the last month of the year and it's it's a time we didn't We look deep. We look deep into our self and find beautiful things. There are wonderful things in us and gets in touch with the wonderful things in us. So I want to speak about something that to me would be a very eleic type of topic. It's related to the para and I want to I want to express as follows. I want to ask the cash you asked before but I'm not asking last year's cash. I'm still bothered. The cash is still it's still having pairs because it's just an obvious question and it's you read it up. Maybe one day like the chap will be so clust but it's such difficult one this perks me up by the way is final conversation I Like I loved books, the day of their death. The day of the death of very powerful day, very very powerful. The last action, the last of my siblings and I will never forget the week with my father. Thus, it was the week with my dad in the hospital, his last week of consciousness. None of us Some things it was an otherworldly experience to be with my father as the last week of consciousness. We deserve just the children and children. My father was a person who belonged to see the way it worked. The last week was just the family. And that alone is interesting. We are the family. like in the way it worked my mother the way it worked as the last week it was very very holy uplift and lifechanging experience I would call it my father was diving a lot like clearly in and out of consciousness saying brought a lot of stress but in order I don't know who knows I don't know how it works there different times I don't know he's a lot and you see the same very special things will come very calm and very special things and just very holy things were being said and discussed a very calm and special mous this the rest of the last Somebody doesn't have to learn all the on the last day something to be certainly at the end of life and the final conversations it's not it's not very distant it's not far is not in the heavens are saying, "Who's going to go up to the heavens to get it for us?" Not across the sea. Who's going to go to the other side of the river and get it for us? Let us hear it. Do it rather. It's very It's in your mouth and in your heart to do it and it just it's just difficult sucking. It's like the cash. It's people but it's a pellet like he's up. It's not crazy. It's not impossible. It's close. It's not cut. What happened? Tiger is not impossible. It's easy. What was the You don't argue. You don't go. You could say it's not impossible. It's just difficult. It's not possible. It's doable. That makes sense. You could say it's not. It's not even a little hard. It's easy. But that it's like impossible. It's close. What happened? What did you see that you thought it might be impossible? It's a really difficult circum in a very serious way like you read this circle. It's frustrating. What's what am I experiencing here of that it's impossible to that it's easy? What just happened? I I want to express something that I don't want to an idea. I learned something by my this summer that meant a lot to me. I would like to share with you anyway. this I was learning say I don't want to I don't want to learn I don't want to like take something you know like press like but he says something that to me He's about this. He quotes of course he's saying something that I believe he's bothered but he doesn't ask I think I'm asking you I think people learn this they say it's not impossible it's easy what happened so what it is. Describe to us what tone it is. He said to me, was talking about he was describing to us what is this summer and he said a wine and bas he said based on he said that and he Instead explaining Tyra that Tyra is your deepest space I'm going to point something out I have seen people go say like this my mother when she became a balas she went to and she was rich with this new life and it described that it's what we Four minutes ago, your family she found out like her sadik you come any year you see you know people say the story start the plane the guy next to them and it turns out it's your kid grandson every year you see came from we all come from people come all tremendous we come from we come from every people find us we have a family everybody family trees truth not to find out if you come from to find out that you come from you find we all come from. So the reb told my mother-in-law that it did like that's who we are. She said at the time it was hurtful like where was the validation and years later she appreciated a lot what he said. I want to express a guy goes to his therapist expects to be validated and that's a good examp I'm not saying you shouldn't validate but he shows you your deeper spaces the therapist validates where you are the probably does that too but then shows you deeper spaces my summer described that time is your deep space it's in you when we g the mushroom before Sarah said is don't be jealous. But I'm jealous. Don't shame the jealousy. That's what I did when I was young. Said don't be jealous. I'm not jealous, but you are. Don't shame it. Know you have a space you can get. Tyrus said don't be jealous means that I'm shadow. Means that there's a place in me. A journey. Think a week, a month, a year, five years. It means there's a place I could travel. Tire is your deep space. told this is your story. This is what this is what you're sh don't don't shame it into the journey. He didn't allow for the journey. Allow for a journey to a deeper space. You're jealous. The says don't be jealous. It's not so I'm so contradictory to the it's it's saying that I could find something deeper with I could talk to myself and study and find My question there's a pro I'm jealous I have to do describes the law that you should do. He describes what you should do. There's a there's an to do. You tell yourself what you should do and your beliefs to do that. So when you're jealous there's what you do. You can't tell I'm just jealous and I have work to do. So the work is your picture. It's different than any other shots. It's different than you're not doing. There's a lot of when I study even that and even that I study places that I'm shy to. So I find out they literally find out the places that were shy to the he was describing it's funny. It's far from you. It's not true. He said he didn't ask this cash. I didn't discuss this parish. He as such a thoughtprovoking question which reminded me when he said it I thought that he said is the world full of selfish people or giving people. It's a very intriguing question. Could could we be honored that most of us at one point in our lives have been so selfish. There's a place to be selfish. guy like nice just doing that because he wants people to be good to him. There's a space to see a lot of selfishness. Then there's also a lot of giving. Think what people do for children. It's quiet giving a lot of giving and sharing. This world is selfish and giving place. The answer is we have that's cool and giving a piece of share and we have to access that place. slowly people I watched this summer guys from Yeshua came back married a lot of guys came back there were a lot of marriage come through and I love watching the marries with their kids you watch a guy who once was born himself you watch him run after his kids wake up early in the morning 6 in the morning guys are out there with their children make sure their wife sleep a little later taking care of the kids he's so giving his mom a father he's a child. He's about somebody else. I had a mother come with her only son to single mother describing he's my wife giving and about another. She was describing like a tremendous selflessness for her son today. People have tremendous places they can access and get to. So it's a funny question. Is the world selfish? Are you a little bit our starting point before you access the little my me and there's a starting point to selfishness people day from that selfish place not like hey I want to give that's not the energy the energy I'm lonely there's an energy of selfish hashem and hashem design goes by way of that but then of course as a child that expands starts thinking out of bed I want to think about my kid I want to be bigger and I'm meant for this I'm born and it accesses like a deeper If I don't do I'm like missing something. Person doesn't give is like literally missing themselves. Cutting off your is much bigger than this. Yeah. The time you're missing deep place somebody doesn't become a father who wants to give who wants to share a husband who's taking care of his wife just to give not selfishly at all. He's not accessing places in himself. It's interesting made the world through selfishness. He can come here. It works. Maybe the entrance way is selfish to the point that somebody could look at the world say what a selfish place because there's there's like almost a startling point of selfishness. But people access deeper places. You see a lot you can touch the just wants to give just It's not at the it's not when you first encounter it's not the simple place or person and it takes takes time and it takes effort to access the deeper place. He was described in ter of us and one can get there one can access the deeper place there's a deep space in us that's very shy very deep faith that I have what I need. I need what I have very very deep spaces inside of us that were shy as like studying those deep places accessing those deep places that are inside us that's how he described his rice when I heard this and he was describing the world this you could say in the room everybody's so selfish people are giving that when you access the deeper place. You see people have family very generous remarkably so people have families wild my wife and her work when she works very closely they would speak explicitly like that they would speak to get up in the middle of the night to like we don't want we don't want that look at look at children who are working and they're accessing such What is beautiful? It's there. We have to access this deep place. It's called So this is what he was describing in the deep place. I have to say when I learned these >> and there's a sense that it's so disturbing this world was describing the meaning that it's is the entrance level of a person and the person reads certain things that that don't feel like me but upon upon examination by the way I'm upon uncovering deeper spaces we'll find you find it was it was you the whole time I needed to access that I needed to get in touch I think that parent being given think that any children but our own children it's cool but I'm watching a child become a parent and they're like amazed by it. It's a like and you see a couple thinking and of being about another access in places that were born to do this. We're born it's not like it's not outside of a person. It's the most deep it's beautiful space watching people be parents is watching you find actually gives by the way of to when something's you or not is it give you energy or take away energy I'm not saying person doesn't get tired raising a child and doing it energizes you're accessing places that give cut out to a person gives to a person this is something I want this is me there's something I believe in it gives ka tremendous tremendous kindness to a person a person has tremendous energy apparently you need this type of energy to do such a thing because we're wanting to give because and you'll find tremendous tremendous a person would be much weaker not doing this much much weaker not doing it you'll find tremendous I see that as it says those that they get an exchange of power young lady Your body gets new, you get new limbs. If you allow yourself to find deeper spaces through tire, finding out about deeper space, you push get more. You're able to do things that are that are not human because you're accessing things and that always energize the person. You find you have tremendous power and strength in a person. To me, that's something about describing bits of that on the one hand feels like so distant from us because the entrance level went up there but people give a say I get to watch as people run to the front says something that people aren't at they run to the front like struggling I'm not there and they'll try is it is it okay that maybe I don't try to be these are Don't worry what we study in this car. And if you're not finding that somebody here giving still selfish to say that to say that we can access it because of course there's work we might need some we might need other things some conversations but we study we're confident that's the this is this is probably the deep the deep space the rashing says that Hashem wouldn't load us that which I couldn't carry. He won't teach me that which is not me. That which is not me. If Hashem said, it's rather remarkable. Anybody on that alone I could say it's distant that's in charge when you're angry. When you're angry at something and you study says it feels like that means it isn't bad. This is bad. I should have a countenance. doesn't mean I can be there in a second. I'm accessing something through I can find I can dig I can work I can have experiences I can tell my I can through through toil through work I can uncover very deep spaces we all find new new spaces through the experiences of life we uncover and we find deeper and better spaces in us remarkable spaces that we find that we didn't think a lot of friction Friction brings out spaces kind of the story and he describes his found deeper spaces inside himself. A lot of friction brings out people find they dig deeper. They find deeper. But understand the things we're studying were sh I hear this perhaps as sh that it says you're going to learn things and you're going to sometimes have the experience and say this like I'm not shy for this. This is this is far out this is to learn about anything and to say this is wild. really not shed understand that if I'm telling you what you're studying is very close to you it's in you it's in your heart to do it's not it's you takes time to access but it's not all of a sudden the way designed the world is because we're constructed is a deep space inside of us And the first part the consist look anybody looks at a person tell any gangs can be a father of many describe father I I look around you picture your own youngsters but picture any one of your kids be that selfish kids you have the best kids in the world that kids be a parent of kids and and all the physical the emotional cyc the bending the trying to understand the expansion it takes the emotional sophistication it's not wild it's not I'm watching today it used I 51 I think the guys I'm curious people experiences what used to change in like 25 years happens like three years I'm watching the shy things are people are rapidly I'm seeing things like moving I big something things are moving fast change and people people are changing growing there's a lot of cool things happening and and the space in us to expand, to understand, to to just to be more expansive, to understand more and relate more and get things more is a subject. It's a tremendous tremendous subject. We're looking just for ourselves even just in something it's bringing out. I see in the community, my daughter came home with a letter that the whole community Jewish communities technology like taught us and I spoke understand this what was the game plan of this to give today's this is wild nobody in my class had a cell phone none I remember the first daddy when we get smacked the first daddy had a cell phone it was like huge like a big monstrosity and it was the first He gave friend I got a scrum and he asked us to call his cell phone to ring. He wanted to see like so we would go to the hallway put money in and call him and this way his phone rang was like a he had a phone there was no rules the phone should be ring nobody had a phone rang in the first cell phones to access is like remarkable. What's what's happening? Hashem's doing this protection. Good questions. Good questions. Clearly answers have to do with way better attachments, more emotional rhymes. Something's happening. Things are happening. I think we're more emotional because writing person should do all the stuff that you also have to be close to the kids and know each other touch that as to be here significantly and we're being led by walking But things are happening. Things are so when a person sees things we have to get to. We tell a person you have to be close to the kids. I'm not trying to for this. But if it's in the we're taught this Hashem brings us you have that space. You can access that space in means it's close to you. Doesn't mean you'll see it in a second. But when you discover very much I do say I'm being prepared for this I have it we have it in us we do I didn't I wasn't I can't say I was accessing that I can't say I was in that space but we really could be such a space we really could we could go there we could visit there could really access such a place that's that's when I was understanding This I want to study some quickly a little bit but I want to learn from the second par just as well to save some that did give me some difficulty learned some difficult something to be showed. You're You're going to you're going to lie with your fathers. You're going to you're going to be with the others and the nation's going to make mistakes. He's told be upset. I It sounds like such a difficult thing to hear. I hear when I get very upset if we serve to me it's like beautiful thing. beautiful thing that means I the question's angry and upset when I don't serve it's remarkable it's one of the most encouraging to me it's like amazing it's it's sad it's pretty it's a remarkable thing to hear a literally remarkable thing I told a friend this summer said when you said something it hurt me and he called me back and we spoke he called me back I said, "Thank you." Said, "I really felt good." He said, "You're always so robbed." He said, "I thought I couldn't hurt you. I didn't feel so close." Said, "I really felt good. I just want to tell you I knew what he was saying. He's a rank when you acknowledge and you're honest and you finally open." Oh, you really care. I thought you just didn't care. You just loving you. It was so refreshing to hear that I actually matter. You must care about this. Thank you. They called back. It was like he was saying real things. So here beautiful and I'm going to be upset. These are my people. Your people are mine and I'm going to care about them in a specific way which means they're going to realize that I care that I really care about my connection with them. It's pretty encouraging. It's not the connection can run. I will always care. You might think cares when departs I'm going to get angry I'm really going to care to my people so it's going to matter to me amazing describes I'm going to hide from them and they're going to have difficulties they're going to count is going to say is not in my midst. It's only bad things happen because then the says now really I thought he was hidden already then says bad things happen not here then now it's going to be getting deeper And then it describes Hashem says write the and teach it to order that this should be an aid for testimony. The testimony of Tyra is that Hashem is with us. So it's going to be honors and that is going to cause worse Herk a deeper level because it's not true with us. She's not distant. It's current. He's with us. He's with us. He's with us in our stuff. He's with us by our stuff. He wants us. He's here. the sense that is distra and he will find that he's close to Hashem the will awaken in deep awaken deep space I love when guys in the morning I love my kids when I go I always remind my wife and remind me. I actually like this. It like brings up deep things in us. It arouses and it brings up spaces and the aid to the Hashem is close to us and we can we can feel we can experience the closest. The place the aid of our closest learn and you'll find we're very close to learn a few minutes anything you don't have to analyze and talk philosophy open learn it accesses deep places by studies and things resonate things connect this makes sense to me and I this this says something I connect to this this means something to me it arouses deep in a person and this learns here is the exact response and when people are saying So distance the answer is learn study H's read and you'll access deep places in you and you'll see how close you are close you'll access the deepest places that are very and the way to access its hour wasn't so late in your heart something to what's happening here but the the response to the person saying I feel close I feel so far study the nicely read the connect to the you'll find we'll relate you'll find that we'll talk to you connect to this idea resonance I do I I want all my children guys are coming to Certainly a person can learn. I want guys to find I want myself I want my kids to find things in the re this I want my children [snorts] to find talks to me. I like what we're all preparing for the study is one different years in your life used to be certain changes different preparing for different different make what did 15 years ago made my heart like my wow it's a different type of word that makes and you resonate different things but studying and learning helps us access very deep places inside of us and it connects us to very deep places. In that place we learn Hashem's very close to brings up brings us to very deep places inside we're very very close to Hashem in that place [clears throat] that's the learning he calls it a terror stand against us no it's the aus to the to the untruth of that it's not the response which causes such a deep resp not intense as long as we're learning attentively doesn't give us a chance to like relate and engage Enjoy some of the having a lot of success learn way of curiosity curious. I had a mish I was reading. I wanted to like say something. I was giving her as such good questions. I was like was like but first I like quiet down. I want to get to I was He said such an intelligent thing. He was like curious about something in the spoke about it afterwards like different guys ask further questions. You can really connect and relate and understand if you take off certain pressures. I was like trying to read like study see where it takes you. I find in myself with life being busy and precious. I keep holding my entire show. curious pressure to learn a certain way. Let's be curious today. Let's talk what's what's hitting me? What's happening? And you discuss and I'm much quicker that if the side point in the hits, it's the main point of this is this is where my this is where what's hitting me. This is what I'm seeing. So, let's go check it out. You researching could be on a side. It could be one word in the title. Could be one word meaning that you learn the word. That's I would have said that but this brings out deep spaces in the that's the a that's the close it brings out deep space in us we're us all find deep in us to see very good us just to be us a little more ourel so beautiful coming into sh just be a little more ourselves a little deeper ourselves a little access a little more like access a little more access to find those deep space inside