Reaching true Anava during Elul - POWERFUL lecture!!

[Music] Good evening everybody. Shab see you came in tired today. Nobody's even bothering to answer besides one person. >> Thank you. Somebody greets me. Hello. I greet them back. No. Shalom. Shalom. to so welcome for the ones here local. Welcome the ones online. Tonight we're going to have a very short and to the point lecture. Uh short is >> it's a relative but the point is that it's going to be short and to the point. So pay attention because tonight we're going to learn one of the most important things when I want to grow spiritually. bring Hashem into my life, go on the path that I need to go on, then I require a very unique attribute, a very special quality that is called midata, the attribute of humility, of being humble. And tonight I'm going to touch it a little bit because without that you have no way of growing spiritually or moving anywhere in the world. And really that's what one needs to focus on. So today we're going to talk about in tomorrow's lecture we're going to talk about faith and trust in hem and after you figure these two out and hopefully have a little bit of good quality advice then on Thursday the lecture is going to be how to set your goals and what goals you need to set and then how to achieve them because most people they they don't even know how to get to the point of setting a goal to achieve the goal that's a whole different thing. setting the goal that's another part. So we all know we're inul very spicious time very good time to take on myself a change. Now I hope that each and every one of you asks yourself if not right now before the lecture but especially during the month of alul is it's a very special time what do I want to achieve in this month if you don't even ask this question then uh are you expected to achieve anything if you didn't even put some type of a goal in front of you so first thing if you didn't ask this question then start asking this question or Are you completely numb because it's already 10 days into I mean time is passing fast. So first question you need to ask yourself now today tomorrow and the rest of the month is what what do I want to achieve from the month of alul and what am I doing in order to get that and what else do I need to do? Now the answer of why do I want to achieve something during alul has to be kind of similar to everybody. If you ask me what do I want to achieve in the month of alul then I'll tell you simply straight out I'm trying and hoping that in the month of alul with the spiritual elevation that I can reach that whatever I didn't achieve in the past 11 months and I set very high goals but I don't always achieve my goals. So now my my goal in the next few weeks is that whatever I didn't achieve the last year as a goal as a target then at least whatever I do didn't do in the last 11 months to do it now in this month and more than that to be able to elevate myself to the level where I'm supposed to be because I always look at myself with a little bit uh very uh uh what's the right word maybe critique. I don't look at myself like, "Wow, you're doing amazing." The he the opposite. I look in the mirror and I start looking for all my faults. That's one big thing we're going to talk about today is what you see when you look at the mirror is do you see all your great achievements or do you see your faults? But nevertheless, I'm now in a very important time on my timeline and you share the same timeline. We the countdown to Shana and you have to ask yourself, what can I achieve in? What do I want to achieve in the Lord? What's the purpose? Now, most people if I will interview them, they will probably tell me cuz I want Hashem to forgive my sins, bless me with a lot of money, a lot of health, happiness, success in everything, and that I should have a very good year. That's probably what most people will answer. So already I can tell you, remove that from the the title of what you need to focus on. And what you need to focus on is that next year you want to bring yourself to a spiritual level where you supposed to be. And then the blessing that you want will be activated because Hashem has one desire for you to grow spiritually. He has no desire for you to be now a doctor or an engineer or the next software that will come out. He wants you to grow spiritually. Everything around you is just tools for your spiritual growth. So if you're not going on the path of your spiritual growth, then Hashem is going to start putting a lot of dead ends in your life and a lot of doors close. A lot of opportunities don't don't come true and don't come to fruition. Why? Because you're not walking on the right path. So your main goal in your life is to constantly focus and I'm walking on the path I need to walk on. Because if I'm not walking on the path I need to walk on, a don't expect blessings in your life. The the complete opposite is going to happen. Nothing is going to work out well. Whatever you desire, you can't reach. Goals you can't match. You you will find yourself like a stuttering car from 30 years ago. So your main goal is where how do I find my path? Once I find my path, then I will grow. hopefully will reach this spiritual growth. Like I told you, not once and not twice. If you're searching for a blessing in your life, then don't go directly towards a lack in your life. Go do everything around that you need to do and the blessing will come by itself. If blessing doesn't come to your life, you are the problem. Not because Hashem doesn't want to give it to you. Whatever you lacking in your life, health problems, can't find your other half, parasa, your livelihood, whatever you're lacking in your life, just that you know that there's two options here. Either you did something to prevent the blessing coming to your life, Hashem doesn't think it's you, you you need it at this point. It's very easy to figure out if it's something that Hashem thinks I don't need or it's something that I'm blocking the the the the shea the blessing. That's it. It's very simple. So when you're looking straight to the direction of Shana, what you should have in mind is not I want to be blessed next year with a very good year. Last year didn't wasn't that great. That you want to reach to the level where Hashem wants you to be spiritually that I should grow my spir myself spiritually to reach to this point and by default I will receive my blessings and my blessing my first blessing will be that I'm happy. I I I noticed that many people they when you tell them blessing in your life it's equal a dollar sign if I have a lot of money then I have a good blessing in my life which is not always true the true blessing if a person is blessed and feels blessed is when he or she wakes up in the morning with a smile on their face that's a blessed person most people wake up not with a big smile on their face and most people the first few hours of the day are not so such jolly hours and then you need to take your little fixes. So the smile will start going up on your face again whether it's your phone, cigarette, coffee, whatever whatever nonsense you have to ignite your little smile. But blessed people wake up in the morning with a big smile on their face. They don't need anything external to just create happiness. That's a blessing. So if you don't remember the last day you woke up like that, you have a problem in your life. That's where you need to seek and my blessing in my life that I should be on the right track of my spiritual growth because everything on the timeline is already decided for me. How much money I'm going to make, who I'm going to marry, where I'm going to live, everything is decided for me. I don't I don't initiate a lot. This is a lot what I what we're going to talk about today. Hopefully are you focusing on every word because to reach true midata it's everything that I'm talking about. I'm not just giving you a little bit of an intro that hopefully once we dive into the what we need to do it's going to resonate because if I just give you okay do A B and C you need you need to it needs to resonate with you that you'll find the common denominator and then say okay now I now I know what I need to do. So, first it's important that what is my goal to get on Roshana? And by the way, if this is none of your on your goal or anything, I don't even know what you're doing here or logged online. I mean, we're we're focusing on any individual that says, "Okay, I have a goal. Roshana is coming. I see this as an opportunity. I want to come here in 3 weeks to the to the sh to the synagogue to pray. I want to be blessed. I want this coming year to be good." I guarantee to you that if I run a questionnaire very quickly, how do you think your last year was? But answer honestly, I know that most people their last year was uh wasn't that great. Of course, it can come with the right attitude because you can say it wasn't great, but really it was a great because I I learned a lot. But the reality is most people, and this is the topic I'm I'm going to focus on tonight, most people they don't rate their last year based on on the truth. They rate it on wherever they find success. So the reality most people would rate their their last year not that great. You wouldn't get a 10 or a 9.8. So therefore, that needs to bring the thoughts to an individual. So I want my next year to be a better year. I want to be healthier, happier, more successful. Parvas should be easy and all my dreams, goals and desires should be fulfilled and so forth. So first of all when I'm putting my first target is what do I want to achieve on Roshash? So on Roshash I want to achieve that the next year should be blessed. What is the blessing? Like I told you it's not how much money you going to make the next year. My request to Hashem I don't pray for money and I don't pray for anything in my life. I pray for one thing that Hashem should make it easy on me to find my path. Then I should not have any distractions by the challenges that Hashem is giving me to get me off the path of the Torah. Because my only goal and purpose in life is to walk on the path that Hashem wants me to go on. How much money I'm going to make on that path depends on Hashem. I do my part. I do my effort. Whatever she wants to give, it's fine. It's not my number one on the perimeter. How much money I need. Hashem knows how much money I need and that's it. And that's it. The rest I trust Hashem. I have my that's it. So I don't pray I need X amount of money or I need this or I need that. My prayer, my only prayer to Hashem, please make it that my challenges should not interfere with my auding and learning Torah and my focus and more than that that that I my path should be obvious to me. Doesn't matter. That's that's my that's my prayer. You just move the whole world. No, no, no. It's okay. It's okay. I just wanted to tell you how powerful you are. So my goal in the next coming year is to reach to the level that I'm supposed to be to the spiritual level that I'm supposed to be. And why? Because everything that I need in my life will be given to me in the best way possible. My parasa, my health, everything is going to be given to me. Why? Because I'm walking on the right path. So what's the the the bottom line here? You need to figure out on which path you're walking on. If you're walking on the right path, everything in your life is perfect exactly how Hashem wants it to be. Don't bother too much with praying. Don't bother with too much with asking because that's the will of Hashem. So if hopefully you can find uh common denominator with my wish. My wish is that Shana Hashem should bless me that we can conclude Hashem should bless me with success that I can should find my path and walk successfully on my path and grow spiritually and that my challenges should not bother my spiritual service to Hashem. That's it. Now since I want that to be successful I need the whole month of lul to work for that. That's why I mentioned last week I taught that the concept of the king is in the field is not some rendevu in a meeting with the king. A field is a place where you work and a field is a place where you plant seeds and if you have hashem's blessings then it will grow everything that you wanted to. That's it. That's that's the concept. Shashem tells you, "I'm in the field right now. Let me see how you work. Let me see if you come on time. Let me see your effort." Shem is not looking for results. He's not looking for straight A's. He wants to see who shows up. I gave the example in the lecture I did last week that a long time ago, I had an employee. He wasn't the sharpest pencil in the in the box. He was actually not such a good worker. He was like, "Uh, but you know what? always showed up on time. Never ever he was late. And if one time I remember he needed to be late, he called me like maybe 50 times apologizing and relax. Okay. He wasn't the greatest worker, but he was dedicated. He came on time. He was obedient. He did what I told. He didn't ask questions. So, yeah, he wasn't the best producer for what he was brought there, but he was such a good dedicated worker. I I couldn't tell him okay you know I need somebody a little bit better than you but the fact is that take this example that's what Hashem wants to see inul he wants to just to see when you he wants you to show up what you're going to achieve let him do it so the next thing you need to focus on is the I need to show up and show effort that Hashem will say okay you didn't do that great the last 11 months but I see now you change your path I see that you're changing your your attitude and you're showing a lot effort. Good. Now, why do you want all this? Because it says in the Talmud in two different places, both in tracted and tracted that cannot dwell in this well in this world with a person who's arrogant. Which means it's a very simple math here. If Hashem cannot dwell in the world or next to somebody who's arrogant and full of pride, that means that if you are arrogant and you have pride, then Hashem cannot dwell next to you, right? If Hashem is not in your life, then you're not going to have much blessings in your life. I mean, life will just go path and that's it. So, you have to reverse engineer and understand I want Hashem in my life. And why do I want Hashem in my life? Because there's nothing but Hashem. And I know a lot of people when you tell them you need Hashem in your life, they take two steps back because they think now I'm going to come and tell you you have to be, you know, ultra ultra ultra orthodox from morning to night. So a lot of people they take a step back because when you tell them invite Hashem into your life, they think that now they have to go into which is I'm not telling you what to do. You run your own life. But every person is required or should require and need the the the presence of Hashem in their life. If things go bad in your life, it's not necessarily because Hashem is or is not in your life. The question is how much you see Hashem in your life. If you are blessed, then you see Hashem in everything in your life. And I explained that concept. I'll repeat and elaborate on that that when a husband and wife are together in having marital relations to conceive a child, then there's a certain angel that comes down to the world, takes the drop, goes up to God and tells God this drop, what what's going to be the result of this drop? Is it going to be a man or a woman? Is it going to be tall, short, blonde hair, black hair, blue eyes, green eyes, smart, coward, brave, charismatic, wise, stupid? What's going to be the this little drop? So the heavenly voice comes and says everything is going to be up to Hashem. Hashem is going to decide till the smallest detail everything in that person's life. So when are you going to be born? Where? Who you going to marry? How long? What are you going to achieve in your life? What's going to be your profession? Everything in your life is already the road is already designed. The only thing that is left for you besides your level of god-fearing which I have explained that yes the translation is fearing God but in Hebrew which is fear is written and if you change the punctuation you read it as instead of and means that I should see what should I see that I should see God in everything the good the bad, the not so good, the worst, the horrible, it's all God. So I spoke about it very briefly yesterday in the lecture and then a lady asked, okay, I can understand that with the concepts that are close to my h to to me, but how do you explain something like a holocaust or October 7 and stuff like that also in that you see Hashem? So as as sad and bad as it is, yeah, you have to see Hashem in everything. Hashem is the designer for everything. And there's no other option but Hashem. To say Hashem is not involved here, that's already heresy. It's not something positive or good. But to say Hashem has nothing to do that, that's already borderline heresy. It's actually is a heresy. Not borderline. I'm just trying to be nice with you. But the fact is that once you invite Hashem into your life, then you see how everything is the hand of Hashem. What would be the result from that? Then you're not sad, upset, angry, disappointed or anything like that ever because everything that was the son of Hashem. When it's good, good, I'm happy. When it's not that good, then okay, that was that's what Hashem wanted to to happen. Now, why do you want to reach to this level? Because only when you reach to the level that you understand that Hashem is the boss, then you see the real true blessing in your life. Now the level of your observance that's is not what I'm talking about right now. You can be super observant and have zero ounces of anava and you can be super non-observant and not have any gava at all. don't have any pride or any of that which is that is the key to bring Hashem into your life because if the Talmud says Hashem cannot dwell with Gavan Gavan is an arrogant individual and has a lot of pride thinks that he achieves everything when I'm saying he it's she too same thing so if Hashem cannot dwell next to a person's like that so that's your your your answer in your life if you have that in you then Hashem is not around you in your life and if Hashem is not around you in your life, you won't see blessings in your life. You might see like fake blessings, but not true blessings. And I told you the the real gauge for how blessed you are in your life is how seconds a day are you happy. Are you happy 90% of the day, 99% of the day, 5% of the day? That's your gauge. How happy. But true happy because you bought a new uh handbag or you got some something today. true happiness in your heart. You're peaceful, focused on what you need to do. How many days like this you had in the last who knows what. Answer yourself honestly. I can tell you already that most people don't have days like that. Most days the if you kind of like go in a in a in an average the average that most of the day people are upset, angry, disappointed, low energy, not good mood, trying to deal with the challenges with their life with a lot of sadness, a lot of confusion, a lot of anxiety. That's most of people's days. Try to measure in your life how many times a day you get angry. If you get angry twice a day, then you're doing pretty well. Most of you get angry 50 times a day. Sometimes angry like this and sometimes angry. But monitor yourself. Not coming to mock shalom anyone. I'm coming to tell you this is what I see. And by the way, I'm not excluding myself from any group of people. I'm telling you because I am working on myself for the last 22 years. So I know what works. And I was the number one arrogant individual in this world. I know what it means to have gava to have pride and to be arrogant that your arrogance is like disgusting already. And needless to say, I was so what I'm telling you is not in a book. It's 20 years of experience working on myself because the only way I'm telling you this, the only way of having hem in your life is if you have the more humble you are, the more hem is going to be in your life. What's the proof to that? The person who had the most spoke to hem face to face. Can you argue with that? There was never a prophet like Mosher Rabeno. Which means that mosh rabenu reached to such a high level of humility that the Torah marked him as he was the most humble person ever. Nobody will ever reach to that level of humility. Therefore, nobody will ever reach to the level of prophecy of Moshe Rabenu. Even Mashiach will not reach to that level. Mashiach will be greater than Mosher Rabenu in wisdom. But in prophecy, that's it. That's what the Torah says. Mosher Rabenu is the highest level of prophecy. speaking to Hashem face to face. Why? Because he was the most humble person ever. Now, do you think he was born with that mid with that characteristic? No. He achieved it. He acquired it. That's what you need to focus on. Now before we start which is very important and probably every detail that I say you should take to consideration and where it's live recorded 17 cameras here you have no excuse to say I missed a detail. Okay. So the conclusion of what I'm telling you is that if you want to have blessing in your life you need Hashem in your life. And don't again uh uh compare how much Hashem is in your life in the level of your observance. Okay? Because I know many people that their level of the observance of mitzvot is great. But when it comes to this specific attribute, this mid of doesn't exist. The opposite exists. So everybody needs to focus on that. So that's why I'm saying it has nothing to do with your level of observance. Needless to say, the closer you are to Hashem in your your observance of the Torah, the mitzvot, much easier to bring yourself to a level of humility, of true humility. But you need to focus on why you need to reach to that level. Why you want to reach to that level. Now I'm telling you the bottom line. The bottom line is because the second that you have a little bit of pride, Hashem cannot dwell with you or around you. Hashem is not with you. Don't be so shocked when life is not going that great for you because they could not be ab when he's not around you. So before we start, I have to tell you a quick story that you understand the idea that we're going to talk about. And there's a story that happened about 500 years ago in the town where I live in the holy city of where the kadosh the holy was teaching some great wisdoms of Kabala and there was a group of people and one of the students was requested by the kadosh to come and share some words of what he understood of some certain concept. this great rabbi and you have to understand that these rabbis I'm talking about it's individuals that you never ever thought of that a human being can reach to that level in regards to their spiritual growth very high level individuals all the students of the kadosh that you have to be a thousand levels higher than you can imagine to even understand what the person says or even be in his presence. So this student goes up starts giving over his Torah and everybody's noticing that a few minutes later the face of the kadosh who by the way for the ones who don't know it's Rabbi one of the greatest teachers of Kabalav all times he they notice his students that his face changes he became a little bit like shocked but happy and a few moments later he g become even more happier and constantly has these facial expressions of being shocked and at some point he was so like in such a high and all the students noticing that his facial expressions was changing and at some point he became very angry and upset and to the rest of the he was very unhappy. They came to him after the class and they told him what did we just see? So he told them this individual who went up and shared some the Torah he started off very well. He started teaching what he understood from that concept of the Torah because every individual has some kush some understanding in the Torah that nobody has. Moshe Rabenu of course saw all the you can't floor Moshe Rabenu but every person has some understanding in the Torah that nobody else has. So this individual got a very strong enlightenment, shared beautiful words of the Torah. And when started changing his facial expressions is because the light of the Torah was so amazing. The the the the new angle of looking the Torah was so special that the soul of Ramino came down from Ganed and walked into the room. So he was shocked. Oh, and then moments later comes in and Jacob and slowly slowly Davidid and all these great souls and then at some point when he was completely shocked the came into the room the you know that's the Hashem's in the room and then what happened is that that individual then they asked him okay so what happened why did you suddenly became so angry and upset so he says because at that point the student that was teaching, he was talking and talking, but he was so selfless and so focused on the Torah that he had zero arrogance, zero pride, zero filth, complete humility in front of Hashem. And since he saw that the crowd is getting so impressed, he got little bit of arrogance like look, I was able to impress them all. The second a little bit of arrogance walked into the room, all everything walked out. The presence of Hashem, all the sadikim, they all walked out. One little ounce of arrogance of ga of pride, that's it. Nothing holy could stayed in the room. So once you understand that, now again, we're not going to reach to that level that Abraham comes into my room. Maybe yes, I don't know. Depends who you are. But you want to reach to a point that Hashem is constantly around you. Because when Hashem is constantly around you, the thought and the the feeling that you live by is that nothing can go wrong. Everything I'm just protected by the the master of the universe. Nothing can go wrong at this point. Now, it's not that I'm going to put myself in a place of risk. But when you are fully content that Hashem has your back in any situation, you know how calm you are, how relaxed you are, no worries, nothing's like bothering you. Now, I don't know many people who live in that level. Most people all day long was like a how do you call that game? Pin pinball. paintball that little ball that goes like that. That's most people's brain all day long. No, no. And then they think, a lot of them think that they're very, very calm and relaxed cuz they do yoga and whatever other junk they do, but most people are not really calm. You can ask yourself, how fast do you fall asleep? 1 second, 3 seconds, 2 minutes, 5 hours, how long does it take you to fall asleep? My wife is very unhappy with my sleeping habits. I fall asleep. It takes me about two seconds to fall asleep. That's it. So, I'm very very tired. 3 seconds. And she tossing and turning. And how do you fall asleep like that? Nothing bothers me. Nothing bothers me. I don't owe anybody anything. I don't do anything wrong to anyone. A lot of people might think that I'm doing bad things to them and they have a lot of what to say about me. But I'm I'm pure. I'm clean. I don't bother anyone. I don't get into anybody's business. I don't owe anybody anything. I'm I I have full trust that everything that needs to be happen will happen exactly how Hashem the only thing that bothers me is if I wake up on time to go and pray and if I do what Hashem wants me to do and if I'm actually walking on my per that's the things that are in my mind. So, I fall asleep like that. And by the way, not to bring you too much into my bedroom, the reports are saying that I sleep with a big smile on my face like that. Some of my kids are here with me. You can ask them. They all say, "You sleep like?" Yeah. Why wouldn't I smile when I sleep? Finally, I get to rest a little bit and some quiet. Of course, I will smile. But you know what's the key here is how do you wake up? And by the way, not to try to compare no apples to apples. I guarantee to you I have much more challenges in my life than you. Guarantee. Let's start with that. I have seven kids. I don't think many people in the crowd can stand up and say, "I have seven kids, too." Right? No, you're all looking at each other. Seven kids. What's going on with this man? He's out of his mind. So just to educate seven kids and to raise seven kids, that's enough. And Hashem, I have kids. Thank God. I got my karma back. Whatever I fed my parents, now I have seven. And I knew it's going to happen. The writing was on the wall. I knew I'm going to get kids like me, which is great. I love them. They're they're keeping me on my toes. So not complaining. what you what you're hearing now there's no not one ounce of complaint but I have a lot of challenges in my life but I don't see them as challenges it's my daily workout I just ask Hashem that the challenges should not interfere my service to you that I should not miss a prayer because I had to deal with something let me deal with my challenges quietly and let me focus on what I need to do so I have all the rights in the world to come to your side of the river and say yeah life is hard and I don't have money and my kids are driving me crazy and the principal and the this and the landlord and the bank and the hood. I deal with all this just as you deal with it cuz I also have to pay bills by the way. Nobody ever volunteers to pay my bills. I have to pay tuition like you have to pay tuition, mortgage, the whole thing. Trust me, I never got a letter from the electricity company. Rabbi Anafa, no, you don't need to pay for electricity. You're doing such a great work. So the finance side I have to deal like you. I also have family members. I also have dramas in my life. I actually have much more than you by the way. Come sit next to me for one day. I think you're going to faint first of all from the speed and then you'll realize my life is actually pretty good. But I told you that not once and not twice. My life is hectic because I deal with other people's problems. I don't deal with my own problems. My problems get solved by the master of the universe in the best way. Shem presents the problem. I brush it off and then he solves the problem and I just make sure that I'm busy with doing his will and the worrying about other people's problems. So with that said, when I have my target, if right now we're not sharing the same target, then leave. There's no point for you staying here. We have to share the same target that the target is I want to be 100% with Hashem. I don't need to impress you or anyone else in this world. I need to impress only a man only the He's the only one that I'm that's on my mind to you. I have to be nice and courteous, charitable, helpful, but I'm not looking to impress anyone here. I only care what Hashem thinks. And I only care that my entire day is filled with the light of Hashem. And I told you not to complain that I have many many challenges in my life to tell you that the challenges is just that's the level of your workout. That's it. Everybody has to work out. You decide or mainly Hashem decides how intense your workout is going to be. That's it. Few a while ago I had they had to go to do a stress test. I told the doctor, "Do I look stressed to you? Do you see any stress here?" No, just to check your heart and all that. Okay. So, first I had to run on a treadmill, which was pretty simple cuz the treadmill was flat. And then he was like, "Okay, we're taking it up a notch and he takes it up a little bit more and I'm like a little dog running on the treadmill." And then he started taking the treadmill higher and higher like as if I'm running up on a mountain. So, you set the tone of how hard your workout is. your challenges in your life is your workout. But if you have Hashem deep down inside your soul shining, >> you're not upset, you're not angry, you're not disappointed, you're not miserable, you're not bitter, you're not all day long fighting with in your mind with whatever craziness you're dealing with. your late day is the same craziness, but you're happy and you're calm and then you're dealing with things in a in a much more smoother, easier way. So, and how do you reach to that? Cuz that's my goal. I just want to be peaceful and true happiness all day long because I know I'm doing what Hashem wants me to do. So it's important by the way to understand by the way a little disclaimer before I start because I'm going to talk a a lot about how this is relating to your soul. I'm going to use the word soul but really what I'm referring to is to the level of the nema of the soul that is called nephesh because the soul has five components. The highest one is called is called these two parts of the soul too lofty. They don't even come down to this world. Even the you can maybe call it or your aura because it's considered or a surrounding light but doesn't penetrate into the body. Then you have your soul your spirit and the lowest part of the soul that is called nephesh. Everything that I'm talking about right now is in the level of your nephesh because the nephesh is the component of your soul that is born with all these attributes with all these characteristics and many of your characteristics are predesigned into your soul and you'll never ever change them. Doesn't matter how much your wife or husband wants you to change, it will never change. Some people are born with the attribute of being lazy. That's it. They're going to have to be lazy all their life and fight that laziness. But it's not that they're going to say some hocus pocus and suddenly that person is the first one to wake up. That's going to be a mida and attribute that the person will have to work on for the rest of his life. But some of the midot you acquire. You don't born with that. So very quickly to explain the idea of the midot the great student of the Rabal wrote in his one of his books that is called I mentioned that book many times in the past is basically dummies you want to have then read this do what the book tells you and depending on the level you can do many many different things I don't think many was able to be successful, but at least you can try. In the introduction of that book, he explains that the main purpose of the person in this world is to refine his character. Hashem brings you to the world with a long list of good character traits and a long list of bad character traits. And your job in this world is to refine your character traits. to refine yourself. That's what explains is the most important thing. Of course, to fulfill the mitzvot and all the great all that other stuff, but you need to constantly refine yourself, figure out where's your fault and work on yourself. And with the concept of tikun midot he explains that there's going to be on one side the good character traits and on the other side right as a polarity the negative as says hem created everything with a polarity. So also in the midot in the characteristics so when you're going to the highest of all there's going to be one attribute that is the polarity of the other on the positive side the highest of all the midot is the attribute of having humility and it's not that you degrade yourself it's a different level I'm going to clarify that very soon that's the highest level a person reach like Mosher Rabenu number one citizen. The polarity of Midata is the mid mid means the the the characteristics that is called pride arrogance. Once the the the mida of arrogance is triggered then it will birth more midot. That's how it works. Once you b so to say nourish the characteristics I'm going to continue calling it mida then it births more midot. So if you bothering so to say or you activating the mida of arrogance of pride right away it will birth two negative midotes anger and sadness and then from anger and sadness it will create more midot frustration impatience envy jealousy and so forth and you start birthing more midot one person did something that stepped on your toe and you you with your big ego can't handle to it. Then what would be the result? The manifestation of this mid being moved that somebody hurt your feelings is that right away you're either going to be angry or are you going to be sad? The sadness will come in a motion that you're going backwards and you now falling into a state of sadness and confusion. Wa that person said that about me and oh my gosh he thinks that now everybody thinks that and and you're going the emotion is going towards sadness and the sadness will lead to more negative midot. If it goes to the side of anger then it will be an outburst and that would lead you to many other negative character traits. The trick is to know how to stop it before it starts going out of control. Now the only way to control your arrogance, your gava, your pride is not by going directly to the problem. You you it will be very difficult for you to to battle that. The only way is to nourish the the positive side. That's the way to do it. So with that said, you have to understand that a lot of the attributes I'm born with them and that's what was given to me and it was given to me so I can work on that. So if I'm quick to anger then I got the attribute of anger. All the midot in general I can categorize them as good because if Hashem gave me something it has to be good even if it's a negative thing. So I always have to look what can I use positive in something negative. So if Hashem gave me anger why did Hashem create anger in the world? Not for me to be angry at my child that spilled a cup of water on the floor with no intention or whatever stupid reason. The reason why Hashem created anger in the world is that should I should get angry at my evil inclination is trying to get me off my path. Use that anger or an enemy of Hashem to use that anger towards something negative. Same with all the midnotes. You take jealousy. Why would Hashem create jealousy? Most people are jealous. And then a lot of people say, "No, I'm I'm not a jealous type." Okay, most people are jealous. But why would Hashem create jealousy in the world if it's so negative? Our sages say that you should have jealousy when you look at a scholar, a Torah scholar, and you see how amazing the depth of that scholar is and to what levels he reached and you're going to be jealous of him that the jealousy will pull you towards some inspiration that you do something. So you need to know how to take each attribute and to push it to the right direction. And if Hashem gave me the the attribute of being impatient or quick to anger, quick to judge, then Hashem, like I told you many times, will put all these mirrors in front of you that you know where you're failing. If I need to work on my anger, then Hashem is going to put in front of me a very annoying wife that all day long I will get angry and then I have to I know it sounds funny. You're all now saying, "Okay, I I have to work on my anger." Yeah, yeah, we all have to do that. But I'm just giving one example. It can be the other way around. Or it can be a boss that is driving you nuts, but you have to work on your anger. But boss is not a good example because with your boss, you have to work on your anger. If not, you're going to get fired. With your wife, she's not going to fire that fast. So, you don't control your anger that fast. But nevertheless, whatever is pushing my buttons in my world, kids, wife, employees, neighbors, I know that's what I need to work on. So I have a lot of kids around me. I have a lot of neighbors. I have a lot of people around me that let's consider them right now not my best friends. They don't really wish for my best. And each and every one of you has a few of them in your life. Now we have to look at that. All these people around me are basically messages to help me reach to a much higher level. So when somebody does something bad to me, he's not my enemy. He's actually my best friend right now because if I look at the situation differently then that person now will take me to a high level. So now pay attention. What do you think is the most important attribute of your soul? And I know a lot of people will say charity, charitable, patience, and many other good things, but I'm going to tell you the most important attribute that's in my soul. And again, I'm talking all the time nephesh because the nama doesn't have midot. The the midot is all coming from the nephish. You want to educate on that, go to my website. going to have about 250 classes just talking about that and you'll find out all the mystical meaning of everything. So when I ask what's the most important attribute that is attached to my soul, I will answer the attribute that I was not born with that that I need to acquire that I'm born with a lot of attributes, good, bad, less good, more bad, but there's some attributes that I need to acquire. The mid that you need to acquire is the most important one in your soul. And what's the one? Sorry. And why is that the most important? Because that attribute has the answer to all the problems in your life. All your problems in your life are connected to you. It's not that you invent new problems. By the way, on everyone, doesn't matter who you are, everyone is decided what's going to happen in that year. Who's going to live? Who's going to die? How much money you gonna make? You gonna get married or not? How many kids are going to drive you nuts or not? Everything is decided on Shana. One of the most important things that is decided on that day is how much challenges are you going to have, how difficult they're going to be, which ones of them you're going to pass and which ones of them you're going to fail. That's already decided. So all your challenges are already decided on that in itself is an incentive to be good. Now I can sweeten everything and not have too much challenges. Everybody needs challenges and difficulties in their life. But like I told you, the challenges and difficulties in your life are steps to take you to a higher level. If you don't understand that, you'll never grow spiritually. You'll stay in the exact same place where you are will never grow. My challenge is my step to go higher. If an individual is involved in this challenge, that individual is my step to becoming higher. Pay attention because the people in your life are the ones who can get you higher if you can recognize the opportunity. So why is the most important attribute in my soul important? The one that I need to acquire because it's the one that solves all my problems. And if you still haven't figured out what I'm talking about, I'm talking about you don't born with that. You can't be born with that. You have to work for that. You have to elevate yourself. It's the highest of all the midot. You think you're just going to be born with that? No. Hashem is going to bring you all the negative attributes to help you climb to reach to that level. But when you reach to that level, all your problems in your life are solved. So pay attention. Most people they're running around their tail like like in this motion and they can't seem to lower down the intensity of their problems in their life or there's always some loose end that is driving them completely crazy. Some individual in their life that is like a a bone in their throat. There's always something going on on the outside. Everybody looks happy. And uh on the outside, especially here in this area, everybody looks like they have money, but it's not what's on the inside. I've been not too long ago to a very, very wealthy neighborhood. Everything on the outside looks very, very shiny. It was so shiny that we sat in a room. Was a Shabbaton there. And there was, I don't know, 150 people in that room. And as a joke, I told my son, "You see all the people in the room?" Just cuz we were talking, not that that's what I care about, just to make a point. I told him, "You have about $50 million in jewelry in this room. Just look at the watches of the men and the jewelry on the women. 50 million you you can feed a whole nation right now just with the jewelry. Not talking about the cars outside and many other things." And don't think for a second I'm saying something wrong to have money, you know. And I wish you to have tons of money. Okay? Say, "Amen." >> There's nothing wrong with having money. If you know what to do with it and and do good things with it, then that's when Hashem is going to give you money. By the way, when you do good things with your money, and there's nothing wrong with driving nice cars, nice houses, vacations, all good. If you've been a good student the whole year, so Hashem will give you the vacations and everything. If you that's what you interest you, you're not going to go anywhere. And that's exactly what I wanted to say that the misery of most people is because one thing that the only thing that interests them is themselves. If you are a very happy person in your nature means that you are not the highest priority in your life. Means you care about other people. You actually genuinely care about others and your life is involved with taking care of others and care caring for them. You can take care of people without caring for them. By the way, I know a lot of people who take care of their parents and they complain the whole time. She's this and she's that and shut up, grab the mitzvah and do it happy. So, people who are very peaceful and content and happy and they sleep good and they wake up good and they go and sleep good and all that that I'm talking about is because they don't think of themselves all day long. Most people, they are the center of attention in many different ways. Now, when I'm constantly focused on myself, where am I holding? If I'm happy today, if I'm hungry, I'm satisfied, the meal wasn't good enough, this doesn't do, she said this on me, she looked at me like this and like that all day long, what's going on in their mind is themselves. So, when you are on your own mind all day long, that's already the secret of all the problems. That's where you need to uh reverse your your your energy flow. You need to know that I can't read your mind and tell you how much of the day you think of yourself being nice to you. You think of yourself most of the day. Very few parts of the day you actually think of others. And I'm excluding the ones who I'm not I can't shoot to all d I have to shoot to all directions. A lot of people tell me, you know, uh you were wrong with your analogy. Well, there's 5,000 people listening right now. I need to to fit everybody. So don't say, "Oh, I'm the one that you're wrong." There's always exceptions. I'm talking now very very general. And when I'm saying general, it's the majority of people. It's the minority of people who can say, "I'm the the happy side. I'm the calm side and I'm doing good." The majority I know are on the side that I'm talking about. And I don't need much. I look at everybody. Every night in the last two months, I'm in front of a crowd of people in different states, different cities, different climates, different everything. So, I don't need you to tell me anything. I look at every person. I see what says on your face, and I know exactly what's going on there. That's it. You don't have to be a genius for that. Whatever's going on in your in your inside, your entire life is written on your face. You can smile. You can you can do whatever you want. So I know that most people are lacking that true spark of happiness inside that they're it drives them and motivates them throughout the entire day and they're looking for it. So and again there always the exceptions but I'm going after the masses. When a person is constantly involved in worrying about themselves, and I'm not talking about that, oh, I need to get up to to to to to work so I can get money. That's not what I'm talking about. That all day long your thoughts are revolving around around you. What did she s say about you? What he thought about you? How do I look in the eyes of him? What do they care? How don't say this because they're going to think like this all day long. It's like you're the center of everything. and she said to me, "Dear and you get upset over nothing." And so the only attribute that can get you out of that loop is if you have the attribute of that you are humble and I'll explain very soon what it means. Don't think that you now have to lie on the floor in dirty clothes. That's not midav. Mosher Rabenu was a very rich individual. Mosher Rabenu didn't walk like this like some beggar. Mosher Rabenu he knew exactly who he is. Having this mida is knowing who you are and what you're worth but just not bragging about it. That's it. So the attribute that will solve the problem that constantly I am the number one. And why is that a problem? Because when you are the center of attention you are pushing away from you any blessings in your life because you're arrogant and Hashem will not dwell around you. That's it. I I'm already telling you the key is very simple here. And I've been repeating the same key for the last five, six, seven years. I don't deal with any of my problems. I just deal with other people's problems. I'm not the center of attention. I know a lot of people think I'm arrogant, but maybe that's how it comes out. But not I already went through the grinder of Hashem. He made me this big 20 years ago. There wasn't any place of growth in arrogance there. But nevertheless, when we're talking about the mid the attribute of which the the translation is to be humble is there's different levels and there's different definitions. So today we're not going to talk about all the definitions and all the levels. Today I want to go through a few major key points that you can at you need to recognize where you holding. You need to recognize hopefully by the end of the night how much anava you have in you and how bad the situation is. So if you have a lot of me down you don't have it where are you holding. So first of all we know that gava is not a good attribute. Gava means pride by honor. It can have a few other words surrounding it but it's the fact that you have your own pride. Now you can be very proud of your own hard work. That's not what I'm talking about. Talking about that you feel that everybody needs to respect you. You need to be the center of attention. It's your thought that counts. What you think, want, wish is what should be. And I'm saying it like that. And I know all of you are saying, "No, no, that's not me." It is each one in their little way. And I'll elaborate on that. Don't worry. I'm not going to leave you in the dark. If one needs to ask yeah better not to be arrogant in any type of a way but in the first level that I'm talking about in mida is better not to to that person understands that it's not good to have a a pride I'm talking about three different levels in the in when you where you can hold the first one is that you know it's not good to be arrogant you just know you know and in that level you know that who you are what you're worth you're saying I'm already I have experience I know I'm a good-hearted person I know I'm a good worker I know I'm a dedicated this you know who you are you you you understand that it's not good to be arrogant you know your value your worth but you also understand that whatever you were given it's not yours so I'm talking this is a a lower level of anava. I wish for all of us to reach to that level. Okay. So pay attention. I'll repeat now. The lowest level, let's call it now the lowest level of midatava is that you understand that it's not good and you see sometimes how you want to have a lot of pride and you hold yourself back and on the contrary you you know exactly who you are. You don't brag about it. You understand that all the good abilities that Hashem gave it to you, Hashem gave it to you. I'm a good lawyer. Yeah, Hashem gave me the wit. I'm a good doctor. Hashem gave me the talent. I'm a good father because Hashem gave me the the the grace to be a good father. Whatever it is, I don't take credit for anything. Nice good level of the second one is not only that I feel that everything of number one, I also feel that I'm a little bit higher in my level. And uh with that with all the qualities that Hashem gave me, if he would give it to somebody else, that person will be better than me. Okay? And I understand that. Yeah, Hashem gave me good qualities. I I know what I'm good at. You need to know where you're good at. If you don't know where you're good at, then that's a big problem that you need to solve tonight. You need to be able to stand in the mirror and to say very clearly, I'm very good at this and I'm not good at this. If you don't know how to say that fast, then I would write it on a piece of note and keep it in your in front of you all day long because you need to know where I'm good at so you can nourish that and focus because Hashem gave you that quality, that talent and nourish that and where I'm not good at then I should work on that. Should I refine myself? So the second level is that I understand who I am and my values. I don't find any reason to that I need to be brag about that. I know it's because Hashem gave it to me. Now the second level that I'm talking about is that I know that if I would take my qualities that Hashem gave it and give it to somebody else right now, they'll be much better than me. That's a level of an that you look at other people and you understand I want to be number one, but I'll never be number one. There's always going to be somebody better than me. And I'm not taking it as somebody something bad. I'm just taking it as inspiration. I will never be number one. You know why? Because only number one is Hashem. If you think you'll ever be number one in something, you're arrogant. And it's in everything in your life. You want to strive to be the best of your abilities. But to say I want to be the number one, you'll never be number one in anything that you think because there's always going to be somebody that will come and become and will be better than you. That's it. That's what you have to have in the back of your mind. I want to strive to be number one, but I'm not and I never will be. And what's the the practice to that? That if my qualities would be given out to a different individual, they would do much better than me. Therefore, I have respect and honor to every person in front of me. And the way to practice that is every person that I meet, I can come and tell myself I'm smarter than them. I'm more educated. I'm more close to Hashem. I can come in with all sorts of excuses. I'm better in business. I'm more smarter here. I'm better than that. But the right way, and that's what I practice, is that I look at another person. The first thing that comes up to my mind is that that person has at least one quality that I don't have. Not that I'm not good at, that I don't have. Because if I would come with full force arrogance, then I would look at people from above like this. What did you achieve today? Oh, you know what I achieved. You know what I did? You know what I you know you you know how much I was able to. Now I'm coming from a place of experience because I was top arrogant in the in in the in the world till Hashem broke me into pieces. So I know what it means to be the arrogant side that you think that everything good in your life it's your success, your wisdom, your courage. Yesterday I shared my personal story. Some of you were here yesterday. Some of them know you know the story. Hashem made me very successful. By the age of 26, I had millions of dollars. Millions. Not two and a half. Millions. Lived like a superstar. Hashem took me like a ballistic missile to the highest place a human being can reach in this world. I had a lot of money. I had a lot of honor. Everybody around me gave me a lot of honor. Why? Because if you wouldn't, then you you would get it somehow one way or another. That's how I was. For the ones of you who weren't here yesterday, then go online and watch it. But I said in in a three-hour lecture how in the six years when I came to the United States, still my near-death experience, I was basically to say to to to say it in the nicest way possible, in the shortest way possible, I was a criminal. That's it. Drug addict, drug dealer, drug trafficker, criminal. That's it. All I cared about is money. And my arrogance was so out of control that I was convinced that I'm I'm the one who's running the show. So, Hashem took me to the highest point one can reach and then dropped in one shot. So, the crash is like you can't handle the crash. It's not a regular crash. The Zor calls it from a very very high mountain to the deepest pit hole in the universe. So I know how it is to be on the arrogant side thinking that I did everything. It was my plan, my thoughts, my wit. I was brave enough to do it. I was the one who jumped in. So Hashem made me this big. Yesterday I shared the story. Shem took me on another journey three years made me this big. crushed me into pieces that I understand that the only thing that controls everything in my life is the kosh is the master of the universe and the second that you get that through your thick mind life changes. So the second level of anava is that when you look at another person and you say that person has something that I don't have. When I look at another person, I don't come with the thought of, oh, that person is coming to ask me, a question, and there's five people behind that person. I will give you some of my gracious time and my wit to answer your problem. You simple limited-minded person of you. When I see a person approach me, the first thing I'm like, what the that person is going to teach me now something. If not, Hashem wouldn't put that person in front of me. I'm not here to ask answer your question. I'm here to see what you you're going to tell me something. But the attitude that I hold is that when I look at any person, I don't come with feelings of I'm much more superior than you because I know more Torah than you and I did more in my life and I did this and I achieved that. I attribute all my success to Hashem. I just drive the the the the vehicle and in most of the cases I don't even drive. It's like a Tesla. I just sit like this. See what Hashem tells me to do. That's it. So I don't take credit to anything that is successful in my life. So a person that sees another person and has great respect for them that they can be better than them in anything in life, that's already a second level of anava that I don't look at people from above. I look at people and what can you teach me? You can teach me something for sure. I have a lot more to teach you. But I want to learn something from you. You must have something that I don't have. Therefore, I have much more respect. I build respect for you. I told you if you want to know my entire approach of how I deal with my spiritual growth and walking on my journey, it's limited to one very small letter that was written by the Nakmonades. the letter of learn that follow that that's the path I'm walking on and in the next few days and the next few weeks on I'll teach more about that but that's really the you want to go to a place of success that's what you need to walk on and there he teaches you very simple every person in front of you you have to have respect for them if you're disrespectful for any individual even your enemy right now before the person wants to kill you have the the minimum of respect to them they're still human beings Now we have the third level that I can define of anava higher level is that I'm humble. I have a very high level of humility. What's called that I see you that you're great and I'm lower than you. I have all the good attributes in nava but I'm still focusing on myself because in my mind I'm so humble and I'm so humble. It's like unbelievable how humble I am. The fact that you said once I'm so humble you're already focusing on yourself. So you're not that humble that level that you're not even focused on yourself most and I I'll elaborate what he means focus on myself. Hashem comes down to the world. He degrades his level to create a world. For him to create a world is like for me to go down now and clean the sewage. That's the comparison. It's not an honorable thing. And Hashem creates billions of worlds. There are billions of worlds. They are created. They are destroyed. For Hashem to create a world is like for me to do the simplest task. So for Hashem to create the world, he degrades himself. He brings himself down to a level of a creator to create a world. Pay attention to little details. Pay attention to you. Hashem is bringing himself down and he's dealing with very little things with you. When I'm saying you, by the way, don't get offended. I'm I'm in the you. It's just I'm not going to say you and me and me and you and start explaining myself. Sh deals with us. Simple basic things. The true level of anava that you want to reach to that I know that I have great value and I know that my actions have great value. I don't know if you feel that or if you think that or if you know that but you have great value. If you don't think that then I'm telling you start thinking that if you wouldn't have value in the world you wouldn't be existing. So it means Hashem has a lot of value means you are valuable and if you are valuable you need to know that and you need to know what is your value. What are you contributing to the world? You don't have to be now the next uh super internet hero to affect the entire world. You need to focus on your place in the world. How are you contributing to the entire system? How would you do that when you understand that you have great value? I know a lot of people don't think they have any value in anything that you do. Then I'm coming and telling you you have a lot of value. Not only you have a lot of value, your actions have value. Of course, if you're doing negative actions, there won't be any value there. But when you do good actions, there's value for that. But not only that, you and your actions has a certain quality. And each and every one of you has at least one attribute with quality that nobody elsees have. You are the best. You're the only one in the world. So you need to find that. So you need to, you know, practice that, bring it to the world. If Hashem gave you that, you have to use all the qualities that Hashem gave you for your livelihood, for your spiritual growth, for helping other people. So the same way that Hashem Yah so to say degrades himself to come down and create the world, then I need to do the exact same thing and bring myself down that that I should be in this level of humility. The same way Hashem does that and I do actions that are not for my honor. A lot of people do things and they do it for their honor. I want to look good. I want to feel that I was able to do it. The point is to be able to do that is to bring myself down and to do that action. For me to be humble, not because I'm doing something for myself. It's complete selfness. I'm not doing anything for myself. It's I'm doing it only for the other individual. Whatever that is. and that's my purpose. Now you make your ends meet because most people they don't know their purpose. That's the sad reality. Most people wake up in the morning completely clueless. They don't know where they're going. No, no guidance in what's their purpose. That's the sad reality. And I and I know most people saying going to say now so how do I find my purpose? Then start working on midata. You'll start going towards your purpose because you understand that what wherever Hashem puts you that's his will and whatever would be the result and the outcome that's his will and whatever you're going through that's for you to be educated and to be inspired to change something. How to reach to all that is when you stop focusing on yourself. So when a person is busy all day long with themselves and again don't take it the wrong way but most of us are busy with me all day long very few people are not busy with themselves but when I'm not busy with myself all day long and I do what I'm supposed to do and what I'm supposed to do is your space in the world a portion of that is your service to Hashem and a portion of that is your own self-refinement and a portion of that is what you need to contribute to the world. That's the title the the definition of the title. Do what you know what you're supposed to do. I first do what I'm supposed to do. Then if there's free time, then I do others. I never have free time because what I'm supposed to do first of all, I have to serve my master. So I have to follow the mitzvot whatever he tells me to do. No questions here. Nobody's consulting you. If you want to do it, you don't want to do it, it's good for you, it's not good for you, that's your job. That's what you need to do. The better you do it, the closer you are to Hashem. The next thing that I that is in my life is what do I learn? How do I refine myself? That's my daily job. Every day, how am I refining myself? And every day a challenge will arouse five. And I know that the challenge that I need to deal with today, that's my refinement because this challenge will get me angry. Okay, calm your anger down. This challenge is going to make me jealous. you you know calm your jealousy down. This challenge is going to get me very impatient or very judgmental. So I'm not being now upset because of my challenges. I understand that's my workout. So a portion of it I told you is your service to Hashem. That's the mitzvah what you need to do. A portion of it is my refinement and another portion is what do I do for others. When you're focusing on this, your day will be full. You're not going to have much time for Netflix series after that. But you know what's going to happen? You're gonna go to sleep with a smile on your face. You're going to wake up happy, productive, inspired, healthy, good mood, hap, everything. Now, what's the greatest value of what you I just told you is that you're able to reveal the virtue of your reality. Most people don't know their virtues. They have a feeling maybe but each and every one of you has a certain virtue that is above others and you were giving that virtue to apply it to fulfill your purpose. When you bring yourself to a place of humility then this virtue is being revealed in you and by default again you're a higher level happier person more successful and so forth. So really that is what's going to re reveal to you your purpose. Once you're done with that, you can start working on the ladder of anava. So if I want to take the advice of the great teacher the so he says anava you have to first of all you have to have amuna. You have to have believe in hashem because to reach a very high level of is knowing that hashem is in control 100%. You have zero control. You are basically walking on the on the path and what is required from you is to recognize Hashem's hand is to thank him to do whatever you need to do. That's it. That's what you required. So you have to have amuna and they go together. That's why tomorrow tomorrow's topic will be about amuna. Your faith, your belief, your trust in Hashem. The fact that you believe that Hashem is existing that's one thing. how much he can interfere in your life. Most people have this much belief. Most people don't think that Hashem can intervene in their life and change things in their life. Therefore, they go seek other advice. But when I am very strong with my am therefore I don't have any arrogance. And it works the other way around. When I have a lot of arrogance, a lot of gava, it's because I think that I run the show that I have control that if I will come an hour earlier to my business, I'll make more money or if I trick you now to do something, then I will be able to get something out of you or whatever I think that I can do. That's the arrogance I'm talking about that you actually think that you can do something. The arrogance is that you think that you can do something. The opposite of that is having the mid the attribute of that I have only ama I do my part without the blessing of hashem nothing will happen. If you don't agree with me, then we have a little bit of a landmine here that is going to be hard to overcome because you need to reach to a level that you need to understand that if Hashem doesn't give his blessing, nothing happens. So you in the same place. So when there's something good that's going on in your life, don't take credit for that. Say, "Thank you, Hashem, for making everything work out how it should work out." Thank you. And when things don't work out, don't say, "Oh, I need to do this and I'll do that and maybe I'll do this and and a lot of the times the mind takes you to holy places. I'll go and pray, you know, I'm not making any money. Business is slow. Maybe I need to give more charity." Sometimes it takes you to better places. But in many of the places your ego takes you to to to dark alleys where you think you can control the problem that you have a solution to the problem that you can initiate something and that's going to be the solution. Therefore the amuna and they come together and you need to build both. It's two mean it's two things that you need to acquire. You're not born with that. And how do you acquire that? You just have to open your eyes. It's very simple. Now the anava the mid the attribute of anava is understanding that there's somebody who's running the show. Now you have to ask yourself in every situation in your life if you can say that phrase somebody's running the show because in many of the situations you're not going to say that. The reality is when you have in your mind somebody's running the show, sit back, relax, let Hashem do everything. I don't need to do nothing. Somebody told me an analogy about what I'm saying now. Many, many years ago came up to my mind as I'm giving you the example. There was once a double-decker bus like what they have in England. And the guy was sitting on the lower deck reading his newspaper. Everything was calm, relaxed. Everybody was quiet. Everybody was busy with their thing. But he kept hearing a lot of noise from the floor on the top. So he goes up and he sees everybody fighting there, throwing things at each other, screaming, arguing. He's like, "Guys, whoa, whoa, relax. What's going on with you? How much noise you making?" So they're telling him, "Oh, it's easy for you to say down there. You have a driver. It's not really a joke, but it is kind of funny. But the fact is that when you have a driver that you count on, then you're relaxed. When you're flying on a plane, do you knock on the door of the cockpit every two seconds? Is there is there a pilot here? Who are you? Are you qualified? You're saying, "Okay, the pilot is there." You don't even see the pilot. When you know somebody's driving the the the the plane, the the car, whatever, you you're not worried. The level of that you are required to come is to know that somebody's running the show. That's it. You don't need to be nowish. You just need to reach to a level that you know there's a driver and somebody's leading the show. That's it. And that's where you start. And I I just need to do my effort. I need to do my effort. I need to do my action. I need to do whatever Hashem is telling me to do. But Hashem runs the show. I don't take any credit. I know I can't do anything. I just need to be an obedient creature that does what Hashem wants me to do. That's it. That's what I focus on every day. And by the way, like I told in the beginning, I have 10 times more challenges than you. But the challenges is not what occupies my mind. The challenge is okay, I need to work on my gratitude. This challenge, I need to work on my forbearess. This challenge, I need to work on my patience. That's it. It's the the daily tasks. But as long as in the back of your mind there's a driver, there's an a manager a manager that manages everything. That's it. So, first of all, I'm I'm not worried about anything. I'm not concerned. Nothing bothers me. There's a driver. So to get to that point that I'm so calm and so content and by default I'm happy because nothing can go really wrong the good and the bad. I'm just enjoying the ride. Then that's a very high level. The trick here is very simple. The Ramban says put your head down. Put your head down and your eyes down. Why? When you look at somebody, why should I put my head down and why should I look down? Because when I look at another person and I put my eyes down and my head down, I make myself understand what can I take? I'm beneath this person. What can I take from this? What what can this person teach me? And what can I give to this person? Now, I know it's very easy to apply when you're meeting now a stranger. You'll say okay I'll write it down and every time I meet I'll meet a stranger I'll be like hello stranger I want to give something to you what can you teach me this works very easy if you're doing it on somebody you don't know but you have to practice the muscle now and to start learning how to do that to somebody that you know very well and the point is that you need to able to look down put your head down and look down putting your head down and look and looking down what the Ramban says that I understand that it's beneath me. I'm not above that person. That person has to change something in me. So, and the way to reach to that level of humility is to understand that in every encounter that I meet, I have to learn something from that person and that person needs to receive something from me. The way we learn that is if you're looking at the structure of the of the spir the 10 emanations in the spiritual world we have 10 spirro and on top of that there's a crown a keter the keter somebody asked me a week ago right he's here no okay somebody asked me says that the 10 areat Okay. If you're not following, don't don't worry about it. The says, "No is a no that is not a two giants in Kabala live at the same time, same city, same era. They disagree with the structure of the spir. One of the reasons why the says the sorry one of the reasons why the ra explains the ket is a is because it receives from the world above and it brings it down to the sphere underneath it which is that's the logic behind the raak's teaching that the ker is a because it gets shea an abundance energy from ends off and doesn't hold it it right away gives it over. That's the quality of the spir they don't they don't hold for themselves anything. They give it right over. So on the same level I need to bring myself to a point that how I'm receiving a certain shea. Shea means a certain blessing and abundance from Hashem. How am I giving it over? Most people when I'm talking about they think of themselves the shea stays with them. They don't roll it over to another individual. So the arrogance is not only I'm better than you and I was able to do it. It's the fact that I'm not humble enough to take what Hashem gives me and give it over to somebody else. It can be money. It can be patience. It can be wisdom. It can be many different things. The person who's humble who has midata nava when he receives a certain blessing in their life they don't think of how can I keep it for myself and oh I want to be the center of attention and no is how can I take this now and roll it over and give it over to somebody else same way like the ket receives ket is a crown receives from above and gives to below that's it so whatever I get from Hashem then I roll it over to whatever is seemingly beneath me. So a person who has the level of anava which is called anan is not a loser type of person the complete opposite. It's a person that knows he has good qualities but he just doesn't brag about it. You all have good qualities. If I ask each and every one of you what's your good qualities? Everybody in the room can answer good qualities. Right. Right. You can answer now. I I want to know. making a quick survey in the in the crowd. I if I'll randomly now ask any person here your good quality you all have something good to say right it's about yourself >> yes >> that's I need to hear I'm not it's not a but if I will ask each and every one of you what's your not so good quality that you know of yourself how quickly do you pull one up >> quicker how many >> quicker please rise [Music] give us a blessing quicker wow Wow, I didn't expect that. If I ask you what's your good quality, you very quickly going to answer me, I'm charitable. I'm patient. I'm very, very, very kind. I'm very, my mom told me. My mom also told me that I was a good boy. No, the FBI didn't think that. But if I ask you if you have some good qualities, you're very quickly going to tell me, you know how patient I am. I'm able to listen to everyone talk. Yeah, you don't really listen. You're on your phone and you nod your head, but but you think you know how to listen. But nevertheless, we got that out of the way. Now, I'm going to ask you, are you familiar with any of your bad qualities? Normal people very quickly, they will say to themselves, who am I kidding? out in the public, unless you're in AA, you won't say your faults. You want to try that now? Let's do a Let's do a session. You all stand up in your turn. Tell me your name and what's your bad quality that you would wish to get rid of. I don't think many We're going to have many volunteers. Everybody be like, roll over to the next one. I need to think about it. >> I think you'll be surprised. >> I know I'll be surprised, but nevertheless, I'm working with a with a volume. Some people Yeah. will very quickly be like, I'm bad at this. I'm horrible at that. Then you're in a very good level that you know how to see your faults. Since I'm talking to a very large scope of people, I need to talk to all directions. And by the way, even the ones who feel that they're humble and they they they follow everything that I just say, then go to the third level that I told you of midata that a person knows their value. They don't brag on it. They want to care. they care about other people, they still think of themselves because they have the idea, oh, I'm humble. So, you're thinking of yourself. So, in any way you're going to look at it, the claims that I'm saying even in a very refined way will be valid. The point and again, you try to get the message and not try to categorize yourself. I know a lot of you are trying to categorize yourself. Where are you holding right now? Don't don't do that. Listen first to the to the practical message you need to do. Trust me, you want to reach to a place of Anava and not because my name is Anava. That happened to be a very weird joke of Hashem. Okay? Hashem, you know, has very funny sense of humor to to give certain individual certain names. So, because for many many years there wasn't Anava in the in the list, but in a very funny way, Hashem has his sense of humor. So, I have my fair share in how to humble myself and to bring myself to a place of ana. And I'm not saying it in a in an arrogant way, by the way. I'm saying it with full humility. Like I told you for the last hour and a half, you're good at something, you need to know what you're good at. But then you need to know to give it over. If you know to give it over, then you're really applying your midava by saying, "Let me teach you. You're probably going to be better than me." But nevertheless, the idea behind here is don't be arrogant and proud of the present that Hashem gave you. Hashem gave you some good quality. Don't brag about it. You're not that great. If he wants, he'll take it in a second and a half from you. It's a present that Hashem gave it to you. Use it the right way. Utilize it. Don't be I was about to say pretentious, but don't condescend because Hashem gave you some good quality and you all have good qualities. You need to know what's your good quality. Nourish that and bring positive things to the world with that. But you need to bring yourself to a point that you remove yourself from the spotlight. There's a verse in tim 91. I'm sure you all know it. We say it a lot. Chapter 9. We say a lot. But the beginning starts if you read I'll translate in a second. If you read it in one way, one go, it's what's the translation? He who dwells in the cover of the most high. The continuation of the verse will lodge in the shadow of the almighty. So in Hebrew, if you would read the verse a little bit different, put now a comma. When you put yourself set means when you how do you hear it translated as covered set is when you're kind of hiding your you put yourself in the side in hiding that's when you become that's when you become how did he says the the most high how do you reach to the most high level of your existence where you want to reach is when you put yourself aside that's And when you put yourself aside means you're number two. You're not number one. Whether it's between you and your spouse, you and your kids, you and your boss, you and Hashem, no doubt in every situation, you are number two. When you are number two in every situation, understanding that there's two sides to the coin. You know that in all arguments, both sides are right. How can it be? I'm arguing with you. I'm right. I'm holding my side, you holding yours, you're right, I'm right. We're both right. If one of us would be would be right, there wouldn't be an argument. Cuz if you think that I'm right, and you say you're right, end of the argument. So the argument means both sides are right. Now figure out who's the real right one. Now, Hashem is going to play this game with you all day long because it's not about being right. It's about doing the right thing. It's about being smart. And in many of the cases, nobody cares you're right. Don't try to fight for being right. Don't try to go to that because nobody cares if you are right or not. So I need to bring myself to a point. That's really the bottom line. And if you agree with what I'm saying now, then when you walk out of this door, go and watch the lecture again because I didn't see anybody in this room taking notes besides one person in the back. Maybe some of you are, you know, very very strong memory. You you got it all. My main goal is to bring myself to a level that I'm in the peak of my refinement to the place where I am in my life. That's my goal. My goal is not to make money. If I'm destined to have money, Hashem will give me the money. I just need to make a vessel, whether it's a job, a business, whatever, a source of income, and then I need to create a blessing for that vessel, and that's it. And that blessing is my my effort, whether it's to show up to the job, whether it's show up to the business, whether it's to deal with it. That's it. That's what I do. I don't need to do more than that. I don't need to work in my business 18 hours. I need to work 3 hours and that's it. Or whatever my job is. That's the that's my effort. When I do just that effort, that's Hashem is going to bring me my blessing. And it works for everything. And by the way, I was also single for many years till I found my wife. I didn't go to 5,000 graves and prayed on all of them 60 million hours and read 5,000 books of backwards and forward. And I still don't do that. But I never pray for anything that I need because I don't know what I need. I know what I want, but I don't know what I need. So I pray for Hashem. Give me what I need. You think I need a lot of money, then give me a lot of money. You think me to that I need, you know, health problems, then I'll deal with it. I don't know what I need because whatever challenge Hashem gives me is my ladder to grow higher. If right now things are smooth, that doesn't mean that I'm growing. I'm growing when I'm dealing with things when I'm dealing with challenges and up and down and up and down. So I don't pray for my needs but I was also in many situations and many people are I was in all situations. I was single for very very long looking for my other half. I was poor for many years. everything. Hashem puts me for from all the paths that I can experience the path, taste the taste, and come and say, "Okay, I don't I I I know what you're going through." But I can tell you for a fact, guarantee 22 years of my experience walking on the path of Hashem is that you can be at any given moment at the highest place of your spiritual level and the next day you have to grow from that place by the way. So you want to constantly go up up up like you're looking at a graph of stocks. Oh, now everybody is excited by the Bitcoin. Very soon the graph is going to also go down by the way. So you need to know when to be in. And I'm not saying to sell your bitcoins yet. I'm just telling you graphs don't always go up. But you want your graph to constantly be going up. Maybe a little bit going down. and your graph going up. It means that at every given moment you are as close as possible to the highest spiritual level you can reach. That's the things that need to interest you by the way because when you focused on that the money that you want will come in the exact amount that you need and will happen and you can't argue on that. Don't think you're going to go like this and something's going to change something. People think that they suddenly going to do an action when something comes in their life and that's going to change everything. I love the guys who I don't see them ever in my in the synagogue. Never do they come once in a blue moon. One of them comes after the prayer is making love to theesh. Where were you? What was going on? Why did you show up today? No, I have a court case today. You know, don't ask. Rabbi, here's $1,000. Please pray for me. Where were you yesterday? and the day before and the day before. Now you have a little bit of a challenge. You're coming and kissing the the the the ark and you think you're going to bribe Hashem with giving me a donation. Who are you kidding? Now, yeah, in many situation, bad things happen in your life. It's Hashem is diverting you. Go off, you know, see see what you're doing wrong. But that's not how you get Hashem's attention. And basically what I'm telling you, it's all for your benefit. And it's it's the secret that you're all looking for. You're all looking for peace in your life, happiness, success, achievements, right? I don't know anybody who wakes up in the morning and says, "Today I want a disaster. I want all my Bitcoin to to to lose." You wake up in the morning with a little bit of hope. So really, what you all want, we all share the same thing. You want to be happy. How you measure happiness, that's a whole different thing. But you want your true deep essence wants to be happy. You think that maybe three hours on Instagram will bring you happiness or a nice car or a nice watch will bring you happiness. No, that's not going to bring happiness. And this is, you know, just because it that came up to my mind just to give you an idea of the concept of a person that's constantly he's on his own mind. Don't get me wrong, nothing nothing wrong with being dressed nice, have nice jewelry. I'm I'm not against that. But sometimes people buy a piece of jewelry and all they care is what other people will think of that piece of jewelry and the watch has to be out. Okay, we know you have a watch. What's the time? I guarantee that watch is not even set to the right hour. Just everybody everybody can see the shiny thing. And so you want to buy yourself a watch. You made money. You want to spoil yourself with a nice piece of jewelry. Who cares what other people think? Wear it, enjoy it, take the the the joy it gives you, but don't have to allow who cares. So when you constantly involve what other people will think of the suit you bought, the shoes you bought, the car you're driving, you're constantly thinking of yourself. That's what I'm talking about by the self. By the way, it's not that I'm saying that you're a mean individual and you're constantly thinking of yourself. What I'm saying is that you are the center of attention. And you know how you start practicing all this? Now is not a time to talk about it. But how I started practicing becoming humble is that every time that I wanted something or needed something, I gave it first to somebody else who needs it. So when I wanted when I was and how how did I start practicing? When I was hungry. You're hungry, find somebody else who's hungry, feed them first, then take care of yourself. And you do that with many different ways. But you know I see the time is going very fast. I want to I want to give more practical advice. So let's jump forward to a very special book that I hope you at least learned it once in your lifetime. Even if you didn't that I I invite you. I have this book that we're learning online. The book is called Tom Vora and one of the most amazing pieces of art that when a person wants to bring themselves to a place of great achievements in their life then that book is a is a must very thin book written by Rabi Moshe I just mentioned him before the Ramak uh there are some translations to the book in English I don't I don't like the translation learn it in Hebrew and I teach it once a week in my institute and you can go and find on my website I don't know how many classes but we're in chapter five dozens and dozens of classes we go every little segment very very deep and intense into it and dissecting it unbelievable book you follow the book it will bring you to great achievements in this world and by the way when I'm saying great achievements for me great achievements is I can spiritually grow every day that's my greatest achievement and that should be your achievement by the way Not your finance, not your fame, not your career, not your health. Your greatest achievement and that's what should be your focus is are you constantly growing spiritually? Am I focused on my spiritual growth? Because if you're walking on that path, everything that you need and everything that you want will happen. I know you all have desires and dreams and goals and I want this and I want that. When I want something, I don't go after it. I go the complete other direction because that's how I'm going to get it. That's how Hashem works. You're going to pray for somebody else. You're going to get what you need first. That's the motion. So that's the how I manage my life. I need something. I want something. And sometimes in your life you need many things. I don't go and pray for that. And many of the times I'll give you one example out of many. something pops up in your life, some financial damage that you need to come up with $15,000 right away or something comes up in your life. So, you urgently need Hashem, I need even when stuff like this happens, I don't turn around, Hashem, you know, the boiler explode. I need $5,000. You need something, you want something, then you turn to the complete different direction. Complete different direction. In that respect, I need urgently a certain amount of money. Then I'm going to look for a person that urgently needs some salvation that I can be the one that handes over to that person. Happens to be that person needs an urgently ride from point A to point B. You have a car. Jump on the opportunity. You're opening now all the channels for you to receive what you need. But the tomah to make to cut it short he says three very good recommendations what one needs to do if you want to reach to a place of humility. The first one make yourself a habit to move away from any type of honor respect and and all that somebody praises you thank you so much thank hashem it wasn't me don't look to put yourself front line to receive some respect. So if you feel that any of your actions are causing you to gain respect of them, don't do that. You want to donate to your favorite synagogue, don't write it all over the wall because if in the back of your mind that's going to bring him respect, oh so and so donated the ark, so of course going to give you, oh, he has a lot of money. He's very charitable. Reverse engineer gives me respect. I donate it. I don't need to write my name on everything. You know that only a few years ago I started adding to my name rabbi. So I remember once I started adding to my name rabbi and somebody told me you're a rabbi. Told him yeah for seven years. He's like what? Says yeah I just never signed rabbi because okay rabbi some rabbi you know some people call me harav har is harav. Every schmo speaks on YouTube har you're not harav you are a speaker you are a rabbi so for many years I didn't even write on anything rabbi to my rabbi told me you are a teacher you teach people write your title it's no nothing arrogant there but the point is that I'm constantly focused on what hashem wants me to do so the first h advice Guys, from the to get yourself used to moving away from anything that brings you honor and respect. And you have to be aware of that. Then nobody will come with a sign. By the way, right now you're getting a lot of honor. Run away. You have to be aware of that. The second thing that you should get it used to in your mind that you constantly see your disgrace. Now I'll explain very simple. It's a very simple act and I'm telling you it works great. How would you feel if I would bring you now to the front here to the front of the room in front of all the people and the live people online and I will tell you please expose the most horrible thing that you did in the last few days or the last few something horrible in your life. Who would be the first volunteer? Silence in the room. Okay, I'll give you a million dollars. Okay, with all the jokes aside, nobody will run that fast to stand in front of a group of people and to say the most disgusting thing that went through their mind today, the last week, the last year, whatever. something everybody has something that is disgusting that they thought of they did they want to do they're thinking of doing let's let's you know let's cut to the chase right you got to be honest right now let's do chuva all together everybody has dirty laundry that's the fact I don't know anyone who's such a goody two shoes that they have nothing now imagine now you have a certain act that you do or did or thought or a desire that is not so nice, immoral or whatever you take it in your mind wherever you want to take it. Would you come out and just saying out to people, "Hi, my name is Alon. Don't ask what I did last night. Oh, and I have bad habits that every day I do this and that." No, no, no, no. Most people they go on dates they put on such an act for the first month or two like what do you think is going to happen when that person actually likes you. You know when I was going on shidim I was of course looking to get married and uh I was in my path of chuva. So I went to search matchmakers and I sat with one Shadh Khan one matchmaker and just to make a point across I told that matchmaker that I have tattoos. Oh, >> don't tell the lady you're going out with you have tattoos. Now that's brilliant advice. We'll go out for two or three months. We'll fall in love. Then we'll get married. Then we'll come to the bedroom. Then I'll take my clothes off and she'll be like, "What the brilliant idea to hide information from my future wife." And you should see sometimes the advice people ask me, they come to me what to say, what not to say on the day. I'm doing this, I'm doing that. First five dates between my wife and me, she knew every little dark part of my soul. Everything I did in my life, she knew everything. I told her this is the product. You're not getting anything ahead. This is what you're getting. First, let me tell you all the faults. Then we'll work with the good stuff. So why am I saying that? Because everybody has places in their thoughts, in their mind, in their soul that are not so pure that you wouldn't be that happy to have it in front of everyone. Now maybe in front of a group of strangers you don't care but there are always going to be a group of people that you cannot dare to reveal that little thing that you did or do or want to do in front of certain individuals. Right? So everybody has something that is the ramach says every time you have a little bit of arrogance towards another person remind yourself this dirty disgusting filthy thought action or desire of yours that you're also not the biggest saint. Trust me it hurt it helps a lot. The third thing that he says he says remember that I don't care who you are you all we all have sins think of your sins think that you are lazy to do certain things whether you agree with it you don't agree with it you're you have sins and your desire should be only to pursue purity that's what I care about to pursue purity to accept rebuke and to accept whatever hardship Hashem wants to give to me accept it with That's what the Raak tells you. If you're not taking notes, go look at the uh rewind. So, in order for us to conclude, even though I can talk for another 3 hours, I don't think that I even got to the bottom of it, but to conclude it in some type of a message, the ganu everything that he does, he designs it in a way that you can take something from it. So the entire Torah is coming to teach you how to grow to the next level. That's the Torah. For 27 years, I thought the Torah is just an obligating book with a lot of commandments. You have to do this, you have to do that, and you're not able to do this, and restrictions. And the Torah is a manual how for you to pass the journey in this world in the most successful way. You want to come in not like a revolving door that you're coming in the same way you you're leaving the same way you came in. You came to this world already. You want to leave this world tens of thousands of levels higher than what you came to this world. That should be your focus on everything else will work out. Your weddings, the money, everything. It's just going to work out. Let Hashem run the show. Everything will come at the right time in the right abundance. Everything. Let Hashem do it. You worry about what you need to do. I know you need a lot of ama for that. But let Hashem run your life. Trust me, he does it better than you. He will give you everything that you need, but I have to understand that I constantly need to bring myself to a higher level. How do I bring myself to a higher level? I need the Torah. And that's why the Torah is called Torah, not a Bible. You call it a Bible or a testament, it's incorrect. It's Torah. And why? Because in Hebrew the word Torah means to teach. So this book is coming to teach me how to walk through this world of confusion successfully. Now if this is the book that is taking me through the world successfully and by the way the Torah is universal. It's for Jews, non-Jews, anyone who wants to learn it go and learn. The Torah is for everybody. It's not copyrighted to the Jews. On the contrary, we are obligated to take the Torah and to teach it to the nations. Now, if we're talking, of course, I'm talking about the seven laws of, of course, seven laws of whatever the Gentiles need to learn. Everybody needs to learn Torah. There's no difference. And by the way, it's seven laws, but it's really 70 laws. And if you actually break down the laws, it's more like 140 laws. So, the Gentiles have a lot more what to do. And we have to educate them. in a humble way, not in an arrogant way. We are the chosen people. Get off your high horse. I don't know what you think you are. You're not chosen for nothing. You were chosen to do a task and so far you failing. So don't come with some, you know, I'm I'm the chosen people. Okay? A little bit of an a little bit of humility. Don't go and brag to the entire world. We are chosen. Yeah. What do you have to show for yourself before you're saying you're chosen? And by the way, to to keep things as they are, we were chosen to do a certain task. That's it. Don't get it in your big head that you're better than anyone. Then you are completely not applying anything that we just talked about in the last two hours. But if we taking the idea that the Torah is here to teach me, then look where the Torah was given. The Torah was given on a mountain. Now, if Hashem wants me to learn humility, wouldn't he give the Torah on a flat place? Why on a mountain? A mountain shows, you know, arrogance and put it on a flat piece of land. Or if you really want to go the extra mile, give it in a valley where it's underneath ocean surface. Why giving it on a mountain? So, Hashem answers you first of all be a mountain. You have to understand when you wake up in the morning, you are a mountain. You means that you can do huge huge things. Which means you can do huge things. You're a mountain. You need to believe in yourself. You need to wake up in the morning and after you say your morning prayers to understand that I am now a force that can change the universe. My negative actions will spoil everything. My positive actions will change the world to be a better place and by default the people around me. That's what needs to be in my mind. So I need to understand first of all be a mountain. You're not a nobody. You're not a loser. You're not not good for nothing. A lot of people say what what are my prayers worth? What is my action worth? Hashem really cares what I do. Yeah. You have to understand that you are an MVP, a very most valuable player. That's the attitude you need to have. I'm not joking with you, by the way. It's not I'm trying to build you up. I'm not a Tony Robbins coming to give you guidance what how to go through this world. You have to wake up in the morning and say, "I'm a mountain, which means that I'm big. I'm influential. I can change people's lives." All you need is sometimes to give one person a smile. You made that person's day bright. You did your purpose that day, which by default you grow spiritually. By default, you invite Hashem into your life. So, first of all, Hashem brought the mount the Torah on the mountain to tell you, first of all, be a mountain. Don't be a loser. Know who you are. Know your virtues. Know where you're good at and run after that. You know what you're good at. Pursue it. Use it. But more than that, be a mountain. Know where you're good at. know what's your virtues but don't be humble. Don't don't be arrogant about it. You make money, you make good parasa, don't be arrogant about it in whatever way you think is the right way. You want to buy yourself some nice stuff, that's nice, but don't throw it in other people's faces. That's arrogance. Or write all over your Bentley and Omador. Okay, now he's saying I need to advertise Hashem. What a better way to advertise a sh on a Bentley. Well, I'm going to advertise him on a Honda. So, right on your Bentley and Vado. The loopholes for everything. The point that I'm trying to say is be a mountain, but don't be arrogant about it. Don't be be humble. Be low. How do you get to a place that is the most healthiest for you to become that low mountain is when you being disrespect disrespected or disre or somebody puts you down degrades you. It's called a biz that you think that you need to get all the honor and you get the complete opposite. Something like this happens to you that day just know that you are in the best. Hashem loves you. Somebody insulted you. Somebody proved you wrong. Somebody in front of many people embarrassed you. Say thank you to Hashem. Shut up. Don't say anything because you're going to ruin it. If you're going through such a situation and you don't react, just know you are now passing all the tests in the world. Our sages say 70 years of harsh decrees of gayom are are nullified because you didn't say anything cuz somebody insulted you or you were hoping that you would be the one who's getting all the credit and somebody else got the credit. And so when things like this happen to your life, accept them. Be happy. Be humble. Quiet. but to reach the highest level because I hope that everything that I'm talking to you right now makes sense. I hope it resonates with you. I hope it's inspiring to say, you know, and I want to I want to try that. I want to change something in my life. I can tell you already that if you don't try, you'll never know. But you want to better your life. Let's let's conclude. You want to better your life. I don't think anybody here in this room will tell me, you know what, my life is at the top right now. I think I need to lose some money, gain some weight, lose hair, divorce my wife, be sick, and what else? Most people, they always look high. They want to get better physically, spiritually, want to achieve things. Hopefully, you have goals. Come on, choose th. But the bottom line is that we're all looking to have a better place in the world. I want to be a little bit happier. I want my challenges to be less. I want to be blessed with success of whatever I want to do. Whether it's business, whether it's my career, whether it's my Torah learning. I didn't even touch the fact a lot of people don't have the desires to grow spiritually. That's another thing you need to work on. But the bottom line is that you want success. So I told you the the loophole. The only way where you can be elevated to a level where you are successful and success is not how much money you have. As I told you, your attitude, your emotions, your feelings, you are happy, you're healthy, you are motivated, you're inspired, you're not distracted by junk all day long. I look at most people and I see, sorry to tell you, most people look miserable to me in my eyes. I see the on the face and then they run to their phone 6 hours like this. Like now some people realize that at 3:00 in the morning when you're saying after the next video I'm going to that's it. I'm going to bed. That's where you already realizing what am I doing? I'm wasting my life on nonsense and I'm running after nonsense. And you want to reach to a place that your day is full of happiness and joy. Not because you make money or because you're with your your partner and you're super in love. Even when there's bad days, it's all rainy, nothing works out, but you're still in a good mood. You're still in high spirit. That's what you want to reach. And you can only reach it when Hashem is around you all day long. Yesterday I told you how to invite Hashem into your life. Now I'm telling you that without having humility in your life, Hashem will never be around you. You will feel it. You will feel it cuz things don't work out and you reach dead ends and doors close, opportunities don't work out, hopes are blown away and things don't work out how you would want to. Just the other day, I was talking to somebody that I know that that person is looking to find their match for many, many years. Finally, finally, she found the man of her dreams. I'm talking about a lot of years. All she's doing in the last four months is complaining. The hole for the wedding is not what I wanted and I wanted flowers like this and for over a decade you were complaining. Where's my husband? Now you whining cuz the hole is not what you dreamt of. Say thank you that Hashem brought you a good husband. Who cares how the hole looks like again? This involve around her all day long. Don't you remember how much tears went to to bring this groom? Now you have more tears because the flowers are not purple then they're yellow. That's being very ungrateful. So we all want to reach to a place in our life that I have peace that I'm happy that even when the world is collapsing around me I'm in a good spirit. I'm in a good mood I'm inspired to continue walking only if you reach to a level of anava. So, I gave you a lot a lot of basic things to do and hopefully I don't know I I hope you either have a genius memory or you're going to watch it again so you can apply it. But the last thing that I can tell you and this is really the the top it all and everybody in their life has something like that and hopefully you don't but I know there is and that's the message I want you to leave the door tonight with and the ones who are online to to leave and to apply. It's very simple. I know you're looking like as if I'm going to give you another lottery tickets numbers. If you want to reach a very high level of anava and to do what's called a shortcut is that you have to learn how to forgive people. Hashem is always going to bring people in your life that you feel wronged you and they owe you an apology or they owe you some type of rectification or something. and you're waiting for some apology or you're waiting for some peace or something. And even if you don't have any person like that in your life, then you're very lucky. But most people have somebody in their life and maybe it's not happened in the last month. Maybe it happened three years ago. But Hashem is always going to bring somebody in your life that does something bad in your life that you have all the rights in the world to be angry at that person, not talk to them, cut them off or whatever. I hope you didn't go to the extra mile to slander them, badmouth them, lie about them. But the trick here is to know how to forgive a person for something that they did wrong to you and to understand from that that that person was just a messenger of Hashem. And really, it was Hashem's desire what that person did to you. And when you reach to this level, that's when you're really opening the the the box of anava where you're saying, "Hashem, I know everything is from you." So even the bad thing that so and so did for me, somebody cheated you out of money, somebody horrible divorce, whatever. I can give you 5,000 examples. Everybody, I believe, has somebody in their life that they're not so happy with. And the more you need to work on that, then Hashem is going to put more people like this in your life. And I have a lot of people in my life that are in that level that did very bad things to me. And I have all the rights in the world to be angry, to maybe pursue justice, to hate, to maybe seek for revenge, anything. I have a few individuals like that in my life that if I would now remove any godly intention behind here, my na na nature, my natural respond would not be a good response. Everybody has somebody like that that either is suing you right now or some contractor you hired and he took all your money and didn't finish the job. And I can give you now 5,000 examples of that person that got you completely off. And you're right, by the way, in most of the cases. So, Hashem is always going to bring that individual in the in your life, sometimes five people like this to see how fast you forgive that person. And why would you forgive that person? That person did something wrong to you. And in many cases intentionally, you need to forgive that person because without Hashem allowing that person to do it, that person wouldn't be able to do nothing. Which means that nobody can do nothing bad to you. Nobody can take your money. Nobody can break your heart. Nobody can hurt your feelings. Nobody can embezzle, cheat, slander, nothing. Only Hashem allows it to happen. I'll share with you quickly a private story and then we'll conclude that and don't take it the wrong way. I'm just trying to make a point. 10 years ago I moved from America and I moved to Tvat to Israel and very quickly after I moved there I opened a learning center that many of my students worldwide started to come there. Very quickly it became a synagogue and we opened a woman's center for elder women who want to do chuva. Not 20 years old, 50 years old, 60 years old. Very quickly we did a whole men's program. Older men doing chuva. Very quickly within a year became a very very beautiful place in fat. You wouldn't even have a place to sit on Shabbat meals there. People would stand outside. It was like the best place to go to. Every Shabbat we would cook homemade organic healthy food and our capacity was I don't know 140 150 people. It was always like cramped best energy. I'm telling you, it was the oasis of everybody wanted to go and against what I just told you in the last two hours for many I was a sore in their eye and the many that I'm talking about are not our enemies from across the border. Many, and not to shalom slander anyone, many of the rabbis in ganged up against me in a very disgusting way, not like in a nice way, in a very horrible way. All from jealousy. Why is he successful? Why is his place thriving? Why does he get half a million views on his video and I get three? Why does people talk about him? Why does people look him? I don't do anything. I just I'm doing what Hashem wants me to do. And unfortunately, it became so disgusting that for about two years, major rabbis in my little town, it's a very small town. It's not Miami, were all going against me in a way that you can't even believe to what extreme it went to, spreading lies and I'm breeding up my wife and beating up my kids and stealing money from their organization and I'm a cult. Oh, that was the next thing. Don't go there. He's a cult. And many other things. And it went so bad. I'm not going to uh extend too much. It was very bad. Bad to a point that my kids had to all leave their schools cuz the kids of these people would gang up on my kids. How bad it went to just to understand that one time one of my students happened to be a computer programmer and a group of three of rabbis from my city called him. He's like this kind of a frantic person. He records everything. He came to me after the meeting with these three rabbis. I'm talking about rabbis and you know probably some of them you know. Played the recording where you hear them saying to him, "We want to destroy this man. We want you to hack into his websites. We want you to hack into his social media and bring everything down." This is rabbis. Why? Because I get three more views than them. And more people came to my synagogue and my center. It went to levels that you would throw up what I would tell you. And I silence and people come up to me with all these accusations. They said this and people said that, you did this, you did that. No, didn't do nothing. My attitude was like, I'm I'm I'm not letting it distract me. But at some point, listen, doesn't matter who you are, at some point it gets to you over and over. Everybody's stepping all over you. May it's right. Okay, they're up. They're on they they caught me. But everything is lies. And from having 150 people on Shabbat table, it went down to 20. And from having barely placed to walk into the synagogue from Minyan, 12 people. It became very bad. That's how bad the lash is. But why am I telling you this entire story is because at some point it got to me some point I was like you know there's there's a limit how much abuse a person can get and not to react. And of course many was like start reacting because when you don't react it's you know you you're agreeing. To make a very long story short I went to the rabbi of my town and I told him the situation. Told him you're the rabbi of the town. That's what's going on here. I thought he's going to summarize, summon all the rabbis, do some meeting. You know what he told me? Sue them. In Israel, there's a law that is called the Lashon law. You can go to 5 years in jail and millions of shekels in fines. In Israel, a real law. Now, I'm a celebrity. So, I took the rabbi's advice and I went to a lawyer who had a heyday. He's like, "Really? Can you get me proof of all this? We're going to barbecue them all." So, now the attitude of revenge started waking up. Oh, two years. I shut up. All the abuse I got for two years. Now, the lawyer was, "Get me some dirt on them. We're going to nail them all down. You're going to destroy them all. So for a very short period I started getting all the junk on everybody and it wasn't there was very easy. Everybody has dirty laundry. Everybody has things there are ashamed of, embarrassed and even illegal because in any country not to pay taxes is illegal. So that's let's start with half of us are illegal, right? Doing illegal things. Let's cut to the chase. The IRS is listening right now. Okay. So for a few months I gathered all the junk on all these people and I had a lot of junk to a point that we had 17 lawsuits prepared. If we would go through with it some of them would be sitting in jail for the junk that I found on them. But before doing such an extreme act because this would cause such a earthquake in my little town. Then I said I don't bother my rabbi for anything but for things that are that level I have to go and bother him. I drove all the way to Naria where my rabbi is there. For the ones who are very curious, it's none of your business. Everybody's who's your rabbi? It's none of your business. But since it's everybody's business, I went to my rabbi. My rabbi is the grandson of the babasali. That's the rabbi. That's my rabbi. I have a good friend rabbi. I can't call him a good friend. He's a great sadikov. I don't look at him as a friend, but he's another one of my rabbis. He's not. I go to him for other stuff. But when I need solid answers, I go to my rabbi. So I went there and if you ever went there or will go there, women can go in. He only accepts men. But you will sit outside for maybe 7 hours before you maybe will get the chance to go in. So I went in there. You know, it's not appropriate. You just walk in. I sat in the corner. The guy sees me. Give me a few minutes. You get in. If you go there or ever been there, there's a wall in the waiting room. There's a big rating room, 10 times the size of this room, and there's a bookshelf along the entire wall. So, I randomly went to the bookshelf. I don't go like this on Instagram when I'm bored. I'm never bored. So, I went to the bookshelf. I said, "I'll read something. Be productive." I chose a random book. The book happened to be the book of Tim. I opened the random page, chapter 37. I'm not going to read it right now. Go home, read it. It's like Hashem called me and told me everything that I needed to know through that chapter of Tim. Every verse in that chapter was talking to me. Read chapter 37. You will laugh because it's talking about how my enemies are stepping all over me and it's shameful and this but Hashem is going to bring the truth out to the light and this and I got my answer. So I looking at the goodbye said, "Okay, I'm not going to waste the rabbi's time. I I don't need any ah you here come and say hello. So I go to the rabbi tell him you know maybe in 30 seconds everything that I told you this is didn't it? And he looks at me he lifts up his head and he looks at me and he tells me in Hebrew. Your your life is Torah. Ben Torah means you're the son of the Torah. Your your life is Torah. This is what you're dealing with. lawsuits cuz somebody said about you something. Now, I didn't need to hear it cuz I already got my answer from Hashem. But the rabbi nailed it. And of course, I came home, called the lawyer. He was very disappointed. But something needed to be done to stop it. So, I grabbed the biggest gossiper in our town, invited him to a cup of coffee. He was very honored and in 45 minutes I told him everything that I'm planning on doing. This lawsuit and that lawsuit and this rabbi and that rabbi. Within 3 hours the whole town knew that Rabbi Nava lost it and he's going to now flip out on everybody. So the result was that nothing changed. By the way, 10 years pass, I'm not so popular in my little town, which is fine. not looking for the popularity. I don't need the likes. I don't need the you're doing great. So my entire my entire teaching my my in this world my jour everything I'm not doing it to get some clap or some thumbs up or a heart of I don't do anything to get some uh feedback. I'm doing it because that's what I need to do. That's what Hashem wants me to do. That's what I'm good at. That's my path. Who cares what somebody says about you? Who cares if some person says you are the most amazing person in the world and the other person says I hate you the most you the most biggest psychopath. I've been now a month and a half on a tour in this country. And every year that I come here to a tour, I come back and the next 10 15 lectures are all that I took from the tour. So stay tuned in September or October to find out what I have to say, what I learned in the last month and a half. But one thing that is totally up there that the hate and the jealousy and everything completely opposite of what I talk tonight, it's in everybody. It's in everyone and every place. And you would think you might be my fans. You would think that in every place that I go, I'm being greeted nice. Every city that I was scheduled to go to in the last month and a half, there were the side that greeted me nice and then the side that didn't have a lot of haters which I'm very happy about because it's just telling me that I'm doing good. If everybody would like me, I'm not doing nothing. If a lot of people don't like me, it means I'm on to something. But the point that I'm trying to tell you that I don't care what you think. I don't care what people say. It doesn't bother me. I don't go and read these stupid comments because I will read the comments. Maybe it would bother me because some clown user Mark 278B from I don't know where just said some derogatory word about me. Oh no. But the sad reality that you only care what people think about you and talk about you and say about you and how you look which is again you you want to care to a certain extent. People are always going to talk bad about you. People are always going to trash you. People are always going to look down at you. You do something good. Of course people are going to hate you. Anytime that you're going to do something good, there's going to be hate towards you. jealousy cuz you're doing something good. So the point is not to be impressed by what's going on around. I'm telling you for two years I and it's much more than two years. It's the last 10 years I received and still receiving a lot of abuse from a lot of haters. And up until today it's nothing changed. Does it make me stop doing what I'm doing? No. because I'm not doing something to get other people's attention. You want to like me, good. You don't want to like me also good. So, what I'm telling you that this is one example out of many of things that I deal with and dealt with and I only found one way how to to to to completely go above this challenge in in ways that you can't even imagine. The only way of doing it is when you know how to forgive people. There's a long list of people who did very bad things to me in the last 10, 15, 20 years. I don't hate neither one of them. [Music]