Rabbi Aaron Dovid Poston: What does Rebuke have to do with not hating your brother in your heart?

[Music] okay now as an introduction to verse 17 I want to look at verse 16 it's chapter 19 and Leviticus chapter 16 and verse 16 you're not supposed to go around as a gossip monger and when Hebrews cauldre Heelys recoilless what is rooh Heelys it's being a Yenta it's peddling your wares what does a peddler do he goes from door to door he wants to sell I mean maybe today it's not the same I have no idea but soliciting door to door and he's going to try to sell you on his wares and at the same time he's surely gonna talk bad about its competitors right you shouldn't buy that part mine you know mine is so much better his won't last that long or is not as good so I just wanna know I wanted you to become familiar with this word reck heel you should not go around lotte lake rock hill by a mecca okay why look now at verse 17 you shall not hate your brother in your heart you shall surely rebuke your fellow but you shall not bear a sin on his account now what does that mean this is gonna be really crazy idea you know if you learn anything about metaphysics and you know about the string theory and the theory of the we're all connected there's only one this is ancient Kabbalistic Judaism that goes way back before you know before the scientists came out with these ideas why should somebody ever rebuke somebody why shouldn't anybody rebuke anybody live-and-let-live man right like you what you do doesn't affect me and what I do doesn't affect you go live okay so I understand if you're talking about running through a red light you know how it could affect somebody or jaywalking worst or maybe stealing but for most part what what I do with my life in private shouldn't really affect anybody should it so where does this idea of rebuking someone else it's actually one of the 613 commandments to rebuke somebody so first thing that the clear car says it's specifically your people who do mitts this that's who you're supposed to rebuke meaning a fellow religious Jew to exclude three types of people these three types of people are going to be called racheting evil casillas fools and late seem we're back in the Hebrew on the first sheet by the way late Seymour scoffers the reishi tables the acronym for all of them is repeal regime is rash ceiling is cuff late seem Islamic it's rough heel so he says this you have no obligation to give these people rebuke because they're not gonna accept it okay OSHA keto chain and macabre MOCA ha you have no obligation to give them now you look at the Torah you read it and it says you give rebuke but what you didn't read the rest of the Torah you didn't read the the prophets and the writings well guess what we have an oral torah and it connects i already told you the word rocío is destroyed three types of people these three types of people you don't rebuke and look at I want look at these three verses consecutively so when you go to the number three four and five in the source she proverbs nine eight it says do not give rebuke to a scorner proverbs who's this King Solomon he's just a man well he had ruach ha'qodesh and he didn't remember nobody can make up anything new a prophet is never allowed to make anything that isn't already hinted at in the Torah otherwise we kill him okay so he's a false prophet now this is he says reap reap prove it's already hinted at in the Torah the scorner does he's not gonna accept it so you don't have to and what about a late look at look at okay one second that was the first what about do not speak in the ears of a fool in the ears of the seal by Ozma hack seal out of the there don't give rebuke to the fool and what about a russia an evil person look at the proverbs 9 7 he who reproves a wicked man that is his blemish no kiosk la rocha Momo you see right there even though it says that our rebuke now we have a definition of later on who not to rebuke and it's already hinted at in the Torah the verse before use the word repealed and so we know right just to get this clear no prophet ever came and told us something that our forefathers had not known it's impossible what's the job of the Prophet to come and warn us to do chuhwa to repent with meaning something you're doing wrong something you know about not something you had no clue ever okay just to get that clear so he coholic Rahil some miracle aid do you know that anybody that goes in and there's a tail monger right who goes around and sells his wares is libel libel garbage he's happy about other people's misfortune it gives him more more things to carry around right when people fail or fall he's happy because she wrote the Arabic aveiro he sees a blemish he sees a nakedness you know that's what he's looking for their long animal clean clothes she woman Darko and he is not going to give any rebuke to anybody he himself he hates it and he doesn't want to see anybody improve either because if they improve it's less where it's it's less where's for him he wants to see people fails he's not gonna tell them to do repentance to that's what rebuke is it's how to be most effective to get the person back on the right path no it's called a reproof reproof you're going to prove to some in the correct way to get them back on the right path but no he's lol ahah Lake moraga elbow he's even studying the people he's like spying on people he's really checking you out he's looking for what they call a news fake news he wants to make up thing he's looking for stuff to make up Kidane Lavasa by robbing the far same Cologne Oi in order to proclaim to the world and publicize your disgrace could there a coholic Rahil just like anybody who the rock seals gonna do slow Chiquito Salem these three types of people are disgusted by takako that's why you're not obligated to give them rebuke because they they hate it and then I could accept it now we understand when it says do not write the last part of that verse you shall not bear a sin because of him lo Tisa a lot of hate this infers what she looked okay Co if you do not rebuke somebody someone who you can review but you don't as yet o nosso let her then his sin will be upon you the Zettler fee should call yourself a raving thereby on Zeb this is like it this is a this is a game-changer when one realizes that all Jews are responsible for each other not because it's a great evolutionary you know bond that they created for themselves because that was actually the Brit hadashah the actual New Covenant that God had them when they crossed over the Jordan and stood at Mount Greaves iam in a veil Ava went six stood on this mountain six tribes on that mountain and the blessings and the career all Jews then became responsible when one Jews sinned we were all guilty can you imagine taking and seizing the guilt of the nation that's what the Jewish people are and that's why I would tell Christians when you read your New Testament just replace the word JC JC penney with the word Jew we're the suffering servant of Isaiah 53 okay so all of Israel is responsible one for another and this is the whole reason why one has to give rebuke because as long as you're sinning I'm guilty and I don't want to be guilty so I need you to get back on the right path it affects me as well see from different examples brought down here's the well I might want to skip anything and so what we said so far was that this implies that if you didn't give the person rebuke then you're gonna carry this in because all the Israel is responsible one for another you'll find that in the Sacketts should load 39a now what if someone lent money to somebody a malval of Aveiro the note in law arrived so I either I lent money to somebody and they gave me a gun and they gave me as some kind of collateral right somebody gave collateral somebody signed as a guarantor so at the time this man cha ararot is Charlotte in the Fosse amimoto so the guarantor the person's gonna pay back this loan if he doesn't pay up he sees the person not using the money that was given to him wisely they either he's throwing it around irresponsibly or the choices he's making in the business is just not good so who mojito the ureter our booze he will rebuke him because he's afraid of his being guarantor he's gonna lose his own his own collateral Pena Tariq McCallum beware lest he's going to end up paying for him this is what the reason kaha Arvest it's because of this covenant that we made with each other with Hashem shall Claudia shall glory motto hoffa this is what causes us this is why we have to give rebuke vino macabre if the person doesn't accept it as I knock in any manner we're free we at least have to do aught it's just one of the 613 commandments you have to do it you can't say I think he's not going to receive it from me you have to come out with a creative way we're not talking about one of these three okay that's a whole nother category when and how maybe even to publicize and to what's the word publicly shame that you must talk to your local Orthodox rabbi to find out how to deal with a Russia a fool or scoffer we're talking about a kosher person you can sit down and reason with them and try to but if you're not the most effective person because you know you already have some tension find somebody else find somebody else who will be more effective in trying to bring this person back on the right path in fact one of the myths those are to return or lost objects right you find an object on the street and you can look for a sign maybe the ideas and the wallet well guess what when you see someone walking around the street looking at a map upside down sideways or whatever you can go over to them and help them find someone comes and ask you for directions it's a mitzvah to help that lost object get back on its way well guess what so a Jew or for that matter even a Gentile doesn't know about the seven Noahide laws you have a mitzvah to get them back on the right way too but you have to find out and figure out what's the most effective way okay just standing there with a big flag you know God loves you or you're gonna burn in hell I don't know what these people think they're doing with these bull horns and scaring the heck out of everybody I don't know how effective that is there there we always have to think of creative an effective ways of helping lost objects find its its right way back he aims short and then no tensions will F abarca vero Shana bro shut up and the reason you would not be responsible once you give the rebuke hopefully in a effective way and if it thought was not effective so you you're not gonna carry his sin it's not logical that you're gonna carry on account of him when he he's totally not on the authority he he's not interested ah the Dove Rosetta LaVon Osceola raving however on this thing alone this is what makes Israel responsible for each other this is Mancha HB yard Oh limb cuz of the a mimosa you know when you carry the sin when you had the ability and you didn't go through with it and then you bear the sin and this sounds very Christian but they got it from us as did you then once right if you had the opportunity and you didn't rebuke him then logic dictates meaning the logic exclusion is that you will absorb his sin your ear your standing in the in his place you're just like him the ISA all of Quetta M lo yo Kehoe then you carry his sin because you didn't rebuke him that's what it means and yes please so define when you speak to someone who is different be very careful you'll be very careful it means a transgression love or to violate to transgress he ran in like a trans Gordon Jordan it's Avery yard name to transgress to be yeah and that's so what are you asking in terms of lush and horror when you you find someone you know is more effective so the laws of lush and Hari after we know what they mean what they are and that's a whole study in its own let's just do the basics you have bad intent that's intent as part of the thing yeah it has to be true which in this case it will be so yeah it's be really careful but you're not your intent is not to harm him your intent is to help the person so how you present it you're gonna be pretty much concise on remember you're gonna approach words that I think you're more effective that's the only reason I'm telling you because if you don't tell them you're in the middle telling him he's saying that's much higher no walk away so you have to begin with an introduction you love the person you wish you had you could give him review you don't have to tell them the name yet right and you can describe the actions of a person and say and I know that you know the person and I'm only gonna reveal to you if you're willing to accept the respondent then you can tell him the name but before that first off see if this person is also on board and expressed from the very beginning and it's private you're not you're not announcing it in front of a whole bunch of people right you're saying it privately to this person cuz you know that or you think that he'll be more effective and you can describe it in third-person terms without the person's name he might even tell you I see I know you're talking about and you should know these mentally ill or he just had a divorce and it's not what you think you remember it's partly your venting on a certain level you're also disturbed because we what we didn't read and what we didn't really read it but the first part says you should not hate your brother in your heart okay so let's say normally what causes this hate because you see him doing something that you don't like so well you also have a mitzvah to judge people favorably so if you can't get to that point perhaps venting it if you're talking to a healthy spiritual being he may help you get to that point where you misread a lot of times hopefully that would end up being the situation where you actually misread or it's not you're making a mountain out of a molehill right or whatever it is you'll find out a lot more remember you're going to talk to somebody who you think knows the person who's gonna be more effective so you before you reveal the name you're already telling them you're unbothered it's my problem right now I'm gonna put my problem on you because I don't think I and the most effective person in the meantime you're the sky that's got discussing what it is and half the time either we didn't know the halacha we thought the person was doing something evil and little do we find out you know let's say you see somebody running around and at middle of the night and doing who knows what and then the guy tells you you should know that he's delivering food to all these poor people and he doesn't want anybody knowing you know I happen to know whatever but and that's what you know what I mean so you may think the person is doing evil and so it all come out so you're right it's like walking on a tightrope when it comes to Lush and horror but it's certainly better in a certain sense to talk to a third you know anyway like to your own local Orthodox rabbi or a learning person before you approach them because you know first of all if they really are doing something you'll be a little bit more in tune with what exactly is the problem right or maybe it's a no problem I can know they're there you know I know they're there okay I'm so where are we we're about to tell you a story it's an analogy the analogy goes like this you're sitting in a boat and this guy starts to drill a hole in the boat underneath his seat amazing who would ever do such a thing so everyone starts screaming at this guy like someone who drills Kamisha Kodiak Vesnina taka table and everyone is screaming on him sokku a lot of coal on chest Vina Mazda autoscent what is this if you're doing hey Steve LEM he's gonna be spun hello Toxie on eco death isn't it just under me but I'm drilling what are you getting all freaked out about you know this is then mind your own business I'm rule oh you don't thinks he backed in unique on a sam-i-am taka taka okay dude you know if the mind is all gonna come underneath you it's gonna happen oh Baha FINA makovica the entire boat's gonna sink and drown we're all gonna drown so now we're going to the story of job I want you to open up to chapter 19 verse 4 Joe so his friends say to him I'm sorry he responds to his friend and even if I have indeed heard let my error stay with me okay it's what would you care how's it gonna affect you and what do they respond look at the vid Rashi stayed right let the air stay with me I'm the one who receives the punishment but job 34 37 so they respond back for he adds transgressions to his own sin it's like what they call that how do they say it there's another expression right adding insult to injury perhaps he adds transgression to his sin among us he speaks I know what that word is anybody can pronounce it loquacious ly and multiplies his words to God here Rashi he speaks loquacious li is an expression of many words and raising the voice in other words he's opening his mouth but he's just making things worse right so that story tells us what that's why it says do not lo T so love hate this whole idea do not you should not bear a simply must give him you must give him rebuke and not more by doing that you will not carry the other person's sin the summit limits asahikawa pursuit now remember it sound it's interesting our our idea of giving rebuke is connected to this idea you shall not hate your brother in your heart Lotus necesita bill Rebecca why kiba's mantra haha verbal abuse RAL when the Jewish people love each other and there's all kinds of camaraderie and friendship and Shalom and peace colocar Batu Vitosha have Erica fades everybody is wishing well for the other right you can only wish the other person wins the lottery and lives to 120 and you know is healed and all kinds of good thoughts out cane whoo mojito that's when you're gonna give rebuke shallow you shabba Vera that the person doesn't fall and sink and stumble in sin of Abbas Mancha Steinem Zell is there but God forbid when the Jewish people are in experiencing less less than love for each other right a type of the hatred so then nobody's gonna rebuke anybody else layla animal Kiko in fact the opposite Adorama Hema Knievel owner he's he doing a flatter the other guy right and he's gonna save them cash receipts ah you're doing well man you're doing good Phillipa out there Evan you didn't commit a sin I'll come on atoll idea ha la vara you're real intent is to pushing further to do more evil right they call that peer pressure peer pressure can work positive and negatively right so you need to teach love man and bring people up they have this expression la mid hey loud the kids right la maybe you heard it blobbin hey la man hey go to hell the easy way if ever you've heard because our job is to raise ourselves up in the world around us we have to work on our character but it's hard work so isn't it just better I'll just push the other guy down and I and by pushing the other guy down I'm automatically raised up right it's like not really but I certainly feel it for the moment right put everyone down around me and I can feel good about myself for a few minutes so so that's what he's saying here that when you're you're not when you're acting in an evil way right and all the people hate each other so then they tell each other you're doing great right you're not doing a sin and they're just pushing you to do more evil and guess what the fee shoe some mass then laughs a lot though he's even happy with his downfall and this character trait he's gonna describe is why we're still in exile me the zoo LOV Behrami Bonet I'm a know me young che guevara a good Rufus shall see mop clean um it's this very character trait is it not increasing amongst our people from the day that the there was a strengthening of the grip of this concept called causeless hatred baseless hatred which was the reason for the destruction of the second base of mikdash and still exists to this day any generation the rabbi's tell us that the jet that them that the temple is not rebuilt that generation is as guilty as the generation that caused its destruction through causeless hatred in spiritual terms you either going up are you going down there's no such thing as spiritual spiritual stagnation okay so we have a lot of guilt a lot of things to work on the rabbi's know how to lay it on thick well old high yellow sera until this day it has not been removed this scene Athena van vinod the huh Naga whole ACO pesha and this disease this plague is constantly spreading autoshare Yash give a sham until Hashem is sitting in his holy abode looking down the Viera the Yasir laven he sees and then he removes the heart of stone from within us so I will leave us with this prayer that we should all wake up with a consciousness of what is our real true job in this world is to work on our character to feel the love that God has for us and know that he loves every human being not anymore not only less anybody else and why should i if he loves us all the same why shouldn't I love us all the same so basically we should really experience this true love we have for omnis Ralph for God for the world and that pray that a shem removes the the stone from our hearts and circumcise our hearts as this true circumcision on the outside of our body is supposed to represent as a constant reminder that it's not only the flesh the alwah flesh but the inner flesh as well and with that I wish everyone a shabbat shalom [Music]