Purim Deep Dive with Rabbi Feldheim 2023

because there's always the best so um let's get started I'm gonna give you short to our Torah before you work on on the prepared module and then I'll sum up the module with a different varatora afterwards the first one is just a general introduction to Purim I think a fascinating idea to think about the uh the McGillis starts off with a subplot and then it gets into the main plot the subplot is a story of the king's vero's throws maybe the greatest party in history and at this party he he asks vashti his the queen of Persia to come to the party basically in in a very degraded way where ain't nothing but her crown that's what the Madras tells us and vati refuses to come hummin's advisor sorry anyone okay I thought someone was asking something's advisors suggests that evashi refuses to come this is a terrible precedence um all the men in Persia will have to lose all their Authority vashti has to die says what a wonderful idea and he has his wife killed and he needs to find a new wife then we get to the real story the real story is that uh there's a fellow hormone payment who is the probably the most powerful person besides the king in the entire Kingdom of Persia which at that time was most of the known world and uh everyone would bow tahman he was powerful Rich he had Authority Prestige everything you'd ever want but one fellow Mordechai the leader of the Jewish people refused to bow an entire world that bows but one person refuses to Bow and Hamman says all of my blessings all of my power my wealth everything I have is worth nothing as long as Mordechai the Jew refuses to bow and uh Harman therefore comes up with an idea that if Mordechai refuses The Bell the only way to do it is I have to wipe out the entire Jewish people men women and children and that's what he does and he gets to eat it fast and we survive that's the story in a nutshell what I wanted to deal with is the the two stories the macrocosm and the microcosm the larger story of Haman and Mordechai Mordechai refusing to Bow the Harmon and Haman saying everything I have is worthless and the lar and the subplot the the introductory story of akashvirus throwing this amazing party and vashti refusing to come and degrade herself and getting killed by mukh on his advisor suggests as such I wanted to compare those two stories if you think about it it's very hard to wrap our heads around why would anybody have their Queen get degraded like this you know we could imagine he's a drunkard he's a foolish King whatever you want to think of him it's it's basically inconceivable no matter how low of a person you are that you would make this request so I I think what's going on is something very deep what is the purpose of such a party if someone is throwing a party for billions of dollars you're gonna drink and eat and then the next day it's all gone the purpose of a party like this is a party is total freedom it's the ability to escape and the noise the drinking and to be unrestrained and uninhibited to be totally free the problem is it's impossible to have such a party when there's a queen on the premises when there's a woman present the Torah perspective the woman is our royalty and when there's a woman present all the men have to like be a man to sit there with their silverware you know you can't be wild and free you're waiting no when's she gonna leave so we can a party can start like everybody has to behave themselves in the presence of royalty it's the Dignity of the queen that's inspiring but if you invested billions of dollars in a party then you can't have that you can't have everyone sitting there ready to party and the Queen the idea even if she's not there the idea that there's a queen in the palace inhibits the entire recklessness and of the party so it's necessary then is the we have to figure out if we can degrade the queen figures that if we can take away the Dignity of the queen then the party could go on because then there's no longer anything to live up to what's powerful that the queen is her dignity or her majesty if we can rob her of her dignity or she'll she'll you know give it up herself then all the men the party could go on everybody gets wild and they're responsible so that's the idea of why sort of like the valve limiting the freedom of the party is is a queen and therefore the queen has to be degraded in the persian's mindset for the party to go on when the queen refuses to come the party's worthless so muhan gives this great idea let's uh uh if she refuses to come then we're all gonna have to be good boys and grow up that's not a possibility so she either she degrades herself or we kill her because if we don't kill her then no man will ever be free again and therefore we always call each other so every man can chill in his house um the queen has to you know lose her Dignity of fact she has to be killed and that's how that's idea the bigger story is exactly the same thing if you think about it and that's why I think it's introduced with the subplot is Harmon has every Escape in the world all the fanciest cars the Palaces all the titles the names everything and it works except when Mordecai doesn't bow somebody could have a million followers on Instagram and Tick Tock when one person looks at them and says I see through all of it it's not real everyone needs to Bow everyone needs to be in awe and be jealous if one person Mordechai doesn't bow Haman says it's all worthless party is worthless if the woman doesn't bow and hamman's Prestige and escapes are worthless if Mordechai doesn't bow so hormone has the same idea hormone says if Mordecai refuses to Bow then I can't be called out I can't all my wealth and my power can't lose its power its effect of of making me feel valid when I see being generous and kind and maybe walking around onions of scenes mirrors with his kids and five kids in matching clothing going on a service work all of that ruins my my my mask my my world where I created for myself and look how happy I am so more so hormone's idea is that if Mordechai doesn't bow then he has to die it's all people because nobody could remind me and the the rabbis in the town would say a fascinating thing it just seemed so minor and so out on a limb they say that the advisor who says to kill vashti is Haman is Haman which is strange because why in the Quran come on it's not like the Magilla you know has any shortages of the name Hama we say hamlet tens of times you know one more time wouldn't divert there's no reluctance to use the name I'm on SO mukhan was ham on why did it change his name in this instant so what I want to suggest is that wasn't really Harmon his name was name was what the rabbis are saying is that is the guy is the people in the world who need to be great women the people in the world when we could strip women of their dignity because they want to give up on life and the woman is the reminder of all that's worth living for anyone who needs to silence the Majesty the Dignity of women is exactly human the people who want to destroy the Jews because we remind them of their dreams and aspirations are the exact same people who want to destroy women it's a person who who cheapens women we think that's a minor sin an anti-semite He's the bad guy wants to destroy the whole Jewish people the rabbis are saying they're the same person anyone who needs to cheapen and and take doesn't allow women to to remain dignified and will do ever he can to make them lose their dignity it's exactly an anti-semite one of the most powerful things to understand and the tires still your Purim is the story of Esther who lived on both planes the macrocosm in the microcosm the dignified Jewish woman inspiring the world with both her femininity and her her jewishness she's a lesson to everybody and therefore Public Enemy Number One for the people who want to be free of responsibility and live their lives meaningless with meaninglessness and just a mask so the story of Purim is their survival not just of people or even of religion it's the survival of dignity itself and the survival of dignity really is the survival of mankind because what allows mankind to continue to dream and continue to have something to live for is the fact that there is dignity still that women exist and Jews exist Judaism and femininity are almost the same thing we provide a role in the world to give the world joy and light and Splendor that is what we bring the alternative in a world with no dignity is freedom and recklessness and meaninglessness joy is the simcha of becoming great and becoming great is only if we Jews and women can both preserve our dignity and therefore Inspire the world to achieve their greatness and the joy that comes with it work on the module now I'll get back in the end for 10 minutes to share an idea with you about the module and uh have a be if you don't have a beautiful Purim okay we'll say goodbye okay thank you so much for my fall time okay so everybody we're gonna go to our breakout rooms make sure you have your store sheet open if you don't have it I included a link to it in the chat box um and we will see you back here in about 30 minutes you know sit back over to Europe all the time okay I'm back on Welcome Back everybody or welcome back me I don't know you guys were there a whole time just um okay so you just spent the nice chunk of time studying the nature of the Miracles and the personal nature of of you know what happened on Purim so I wanted to zoom out and put the idea of Miracles revealed ones and hidden ones put it all in the context because it are we supposed to rely on Miracles are Miracles you know the people there are many sources that seem to point in two different directions I'll just give you an example from the total portion a week ago um two weeks ago the poor portion said that when you have an altar you have to build a ramp you can't have steers going up onto the altar it has to be a wrap and the reason for this is that the coin should be exposed to the on the coming up the altar somehow if it was a staircase there would be some kind of lack of modesty but on a ramp that that doesn't exist so it's a little bit difficult to understand that from a technical standpoint I mean the Cohen one of the garments of the coin was pantsayim they weren't like wearing a skirt and even so like how is a ramp different than stairs I I think the message is more metaphorical it's that in life we're all attempting to climb up to our altars you know our life is is an offering to God and the journey through our life is is the journey up our altars you know climbing to make your offering fulfill your calling there are different ways to climb the idea of I know when we used to take students on age trips uh to to Israel so one of the highlights of the trip is to go to Masada and that Masada you know the whole group come early in the morning when it's not too hot and uh there's always one kid who takes the cable car you know when you get to the top you can always tell which kid took the cable car he's the one with the Sheepish look in the group picture he always looks like he doesn't belong because it's a shame involved when you really cheated and you got to the top without without putting in the sweat even before us as canteen over his head to look all sweated up deep inside he knows the truth in life you can take shortcuts and you can make the whole journey a rant represents the entire Journey where you step at every point along the way you uh you you you you touch every step staircases are jumps many looks like a ramp but but there's a gap between each one you didn't touch every spot the idea is that if you ascend to your Heights and you become a who you were meant to be by climbing a ramp doing every little thing along the way there's no gaps then you're not exposed clotting by a ramp means that there's no exposure and you can stand on top of the mountain and do a deep laugh because there is no shame and no guilt it's yours you actually acquired this if if that's the truth many other lessons like that so then how are Miracles a good idea you know so the normal way of understanding Miracles is they're not ideal the miracle is is sort of like a safety net you know really you want you don't want America you want you want to to you're in the circus and you want to walk the tightrope and and and do you want to do flips and that's why everyone comes to see you and that's why you're famous have your name up on the Marquee because you're the talented guy but on under the tightrope we put a safe net in case God forbid something goes wrong we catch and that's the way I always used to think I would have liked to think about miracles and it sort of reconciles it too that really you should climb it on your own really you should do everything on your own and feel the satisfaction of your accomplishment but when that doesn't work you should know that Hashem is going to catch you when you fall the problem with this is it's a nice idea and it it it is there's a lot of validity to it but it seems like it doesn't really account for the the torah's entire position of Miracles if all miracles were were a safety net a backup plan and the real goal is is accomplishment the pride of having climbed the mountain on your own and we only rely on on a safe Network we've exhausted all of our personal efforts then it seems to be that the place in Jewish literature and history is has a it's a far outsized position for that small role the backup you know if all miracles are as a backup plan they should be a footnote you know but instead everything in Judaism is miracles in fact the whole start of the Jewish people before we even fell you know we leave Egypt the splitting seas and plagues and and man in the desert everything is miraculous we haven't even had the chance to go out and try and see for it ourselves in fact sitting by the Dead Sea the uh the you know the Hashem says like you sit back and watch don't do anything you know you be quiet and I'm gonna I got this you know watch what I do so it doesn't it it's it seems to be the Miracles are far larger that just than just the Savior why why is it like our children the first introduction to Miracles is the month of these is Passover you know tell them stories and really like they know about miracles before they even know about personal accomplishment and Purim is like the greatest holiday all joy you would think that Joy comes from personal accomplishment how does Joy come from the Miracles you know there's a little bit of Shame involved when you're saved I'm happy I'm saved but it's not it's tainted by what they call in Kabbalah the bread of Shame you know the the bread that you didn't earn through the sweat of your your brow that was gifted to you so if that's the case we have to reassess What miracles really are about so I wanted to look at it deeply why do you think people fail at climbing onto their altars what is the real difficulty meaning why aren't we all tightrope walk experts you know anybody can walk a straight line unless you're if you're sober on the ground why would I put the straight line in the sky does it all of a sudden become difficult what is the if we had to encapsulate what the difficulty of climbing our mountains is of achieving our potential is I I think listen again if things are you have irrational dreams and that's not your potential but let's say your expectations are legitimate let's say your dreams do perfectly Define who you were meant to be so if that's the case so so why don't we become who we're capable of becoming so I I think the answer is really two things but they're similar one is we don't try because of the fear of failure I don't try the tightrope because I know I'm gonna fall prop it's a good chance I'll fall and break my neck it's the trepidation and the fear that doesn't allow me to embrace the challenges of my life and therefore I find other challenges which are not the Fulfillment I was meant for but things that I believe are safely within my wheelhouse that's the first real love you know the first reason why we don't climb to the top of our altars is that we are afraid afraid to enter The Fray but then there's another reason similar but another reason is that we do enter The Fray we do pursue our dreams but because we're afraid of falling we do it with tentative reluctance we're hesitant we we dealt with trepidation and you can't walk a typo when you're shaking you have to be confident when you go through life even when you're embracing your child but when you're scared that reluctance and that hesitancy cripples your past you people fall people fail at tight ropes even because they don't try or they fall because they're shaking and they're scared the only way to really succeed at life is to go about it first of all to be confident enough to try and then to be confident enough to go about it with all of your strength and and your eye on the ball and not to be one foot in and one foot out that never works so this is where we come to Miracles and why Miracles are so outsized that have an outsized role in Judaism while at the same time we're supposed to do things ourselves how do you reconcile both of those priorities do it myself or Miracles being so important and the answer is is that the purpose of Miracles it Miracles are a Tyro are a safety net but the goal of the Satan is not what you think it is the goal of the Satan is not to catch you when you fall it's when we put the safety net there then you feel confident and brave and now you go about it without fully the the knowledge that Hashem does miracles and will catch us when we fall that's what Purim is about and Purim is about Joy not because catches us when we fall because then you'd feel shame Purim is about Joy because the knowledge that Hashem is going to catch me when I fall allows me to jump into life with both my feet my eyes wide open and fearless and then we'll succeed and will never need the safety net the existence of the safety that allows you to never need it because you only need it when you live with reluctance and hesitancy that's the secret of the secret of Purim is the knowledge that Miracles free you to live without them and then you can you can sit there and climb to the top of your mountain and look down at the world and give that deep belly laugh that you can only do when you did it by yourself without any handguns but nobody has The Bravery to do that without knowing that Hashem is going to catch us when we fall this is the mindset that you have on Purim find in between a few of your shots and the the parties and the laughter find a few minutes contemplate on how safe we are how even the greatest Darkness even though we don't see things happening behind the scenes Hashem can pull anything off and he can save us from the verge of Despair and the edge of the abyss and all the other cliches about the end of the line and when you know that Hashem can do that then you'll find when Purim is over you live with a balance in your step that you didn't have before not because you're carried because you're doing it on your own because you know that you're safe and you can live life to the fullest with the true cop that's what we say those who are familiar with the Hebrew text before we when we before we start the Shimona esri we say a short sentence the name of Hashem is the name of the miraculous the name of Elohim is the is the name of justice of of nature it's not that I'm supposed to abandon nature and live miraculous it's that I know I can call out to the name of perhaps call out the pillow Kim I can live in nature I can embrace the real life because I know that I I can face Elohim because I know that Hashem is ready whenever I need him to interview I have a beautiful poem and uh we should all live lives with that extra bounce in our steps one question I don't understand the violence going on in Israel today well you know who sir that's a great question with one minute left um what can I tell you you know you know what I'll tell you just a one minute answer there are more complete answers but the one minute answer is is Hashem wants us to be one nation the love and the camaraderie and unfortunately Hashem has discovered that Jews generally become closer and become better Brothers in times of suffering and pain than we do with joy with joy we somehow become we live in our little you know our little Islands but but Hashem the Jewish people has always become a people with our back against the wall may we Merit to figure out on how to become one to love each other and to feel compassion when times are good and we should never need to to feel pain and we said we shouldn't be joined by tears but we should figure out how to how to invite everybody to our parties not just our Shivers thank you very much and thank you so much Rebecca feldheim thank you that was amazing thank you Dede race who did all the tech stuff behind the scenes for us and thank you so much everybody for joining the call and the program um we're going to be having our Passover uh program two weeks from Tuesday so stay tuned for that flyer to go out and we wanted to wish you all a Happy Purim thank you confirm everybody