Purim 5720 #3: The Point of the Needle - I Won’t Crack Open If I Don’t Surrender Every Last Thing

Good look. Okay. Good morning everybody. Welcome. supposed to be back from Chicago Monday morning, Monday afternoon, but due to the snowstorm, I I was there. So, I got back yesterday. Okay. Okay. So we did the first two in the Balah of Purim Purim 1960 5720 and we're up to now the middle of Gimmel which is page 410 in the copies. It's page 410. the middle of the line starts the middle of the page like like 10 lines from the bottom. We'll have a Shir Bashem tomorrow also. Tomorrow's Friday and of Shabas. We'll have a sh tomorrow also. Let me just see the dedications. Good. Okay. >> Okay. So, today's class is dedicated by an anonymous benefactor for the fulfillment of the words of Mashiach to the BMP. I will be revealed when your wellsp springsings are disseminated everywhere. Amen. So also dedicated by our dear friend in memory of his grandfather in honor of his yard on the sixth day of passed away and may his soul be a continuous source of inspiration and blessing. Amen. Also dedicated by Yakov Kalman Ben Pesha in honor of his own birthday on the sixth day of Adar Maztov Maztov happy birthday of Kalman an amazing year of success and Yam Rashan on all fronts long happy healthy prosperous years physically and spiritually and also dedicated by Zalman Margaretin in honor of his own birthday masleto of Maztov and also dedicated in loving memory of his grandmother whose yard is today the ninth day of Bas David. She was among the very first Jewish souls taken to Awitz. She endured nearly three years of unimaginable anguish and suffering. very very few survived Awitz for so long. She survived and through all remained steadfast in her resilience, identity, faith and devotion. It's also de dedicated with deep appreciation for this vibrant class. That's due to the people filled with such powerful energy and growth. Thank you very very much. >> Oh, that's so funny. Oh, okay. You have one name. >> Zman. >> Zam. Okay. Masleto. Happy birthday. Wow. Okay. >> Ah. Wow. Okay. So, your birthday. Okay. It's a good lesson. You know, sometimes we read things, we don't realize that it's right here, right in front of us. Everything, you know, it's always somewhere else. Okay. So, your grandmother was taken to from the first ones. Which year? >> 42. >> From where? >> She still had over 5,000. >> From where was she taken? Well, she was there three years. >> I knew a Jew that was there two years and that was unique. Katnik, I knew him. He was there for two years. I didn't I never heard of anybody three years. >> The first time I hear that,000 people. >> Well, >> so yard is also today. >> So you were born on there. How many years ago did she pass away? >> No, no, you were born before. I understand. >> How many years ago did she pass away? Which year is it? >> Okay. It's a It's a It's a dedicated for her. >> Huh? Yeah. Okay. So, we are in the middle of Yeah. Okay. So, the Maya began with a whole about what it means that that night the king woke up or the king couldn't sleep. He suffered from a a difficulty. he couldn't sleep and what that means spiritually and uh explained that at length what sleeping means in a person's life and how it affects the creator and then from there he explained what was the miracle of it wasn't just a miracle on high it was a miracle here in the life of the people in the life of the Jew and for this he brought a pik inim I am asleep but my heart is awake and explained that despite the fact that a person could be asleep their entire life what we call sleepwalking which is the metaphor of the world in the time of galos is called the time of shena time of sleep yeah and that's why it saysaloosa it says in zaloosa because exile represents a generation or a world that is in a state of sleep. Nonetheless, there's an there's the core of the heart that always remains awake with an inner knowing and an inner clarity. Now, when he describes here the fact that a person could can can live their whole life and yet be asleep. And that's really what gullis represents. We we all need to understand the intensity of the metaphor. Okay? cuz I was just uh yesterday on the plane I'd had some time. It was a long whatever got delayed a little. So I was thinking about this h just think for a moment. Yeah. If you were sleeping your entire life and you never woke up, you were alive. But let's say a person from the first moment they sleep and that's how they live their entire life until their death. We when we speak about sleep, we don't really understand what sleep is because we be we're talking about it when we're awake. But imagine we're in sleep and we stay in that state our entire life. Okay? Literally. Okay? And now think what if that's the only part of you that you ever knew, the part of you that was asleep and that's how you know yourself without ever being awake. Only then can you begin to understand the metaphor of the mimer. Like I was realizing that we're not really understanding the intensity of the metaphor cuz yeah, you go to sleep. Of course, you wake up and we're talking about it when you're awake. Big deal, right? You slept a few hours. Why not? You went in bed, right? That's not the metaphor. The metaphor is that I'm asleep and I stay asleep. And that's the only state of consciousness I know of. So now think about yourself and contrast it to your the self that you would have known if all you knew about yourself was sleep and you stay there. So we know ourselves in sleep, right? We have dreams. We have emotions. We We have a lot of a lot of things happen in sleep. >> Huh? Yeah. Hopefully, nobody's disturbing you. Yeah. The dreams could sometimes be even sweet dreams. Not always. But but but but imagine that that is the scope of your identity. That is the scope of you knowing yourself, of you knowing the world, of your relationships. It's all in a dream. And the Reb is saying that this could literally be exactly the life of a person without waking up. Yeah. Yeah. So just think of Yeah. That's what we speak about, right? Talk talk about that's what gullis says the level of alienation to the point and in the person's sleep that is reality. It's not like there's another reality and you're being put to sleep. That is reality. That is really reality. That's how deep an exile and alienation could be. And that's how profound it is to the point that a person could not even even begin to have a comprehension of what this even is because this is reality. And yet comparing this state of consciousness to the consciousness of a person is awake. It's not like 10% versus 20% or 50% versus 80%. Right? Or even 1% versus 100%. It's a whole different dimension. It's a dimension. It's it's not even a different dimension like you you can't even compare it. And that's That is what exile really means psychologically, emotionally, spiritually. It could be individually and it could be collectively. Individually, it could be my own life and it could be collectively a whole generation or a whole world, a whole planet in that state. And if there is even one person who is aware of that, right, they could be deemed as completely crazy and insane, just disturbing the the >> peace. Exactly. The sleep. the sleep. So this is really it's just it's a it's a very very intense metaphor. Despite all of this there's a there's a core heart that stays awake. In other words, that knows first thing. It knows the difference between being asleep and awake. And it knows it has an inner clarity, an inner knowing of real reality. And because of that, the libe is present and ultimately could never ever be dulled, could never be deemed, dimmed, could never be obliterated. And over there the person's consciousness is completely completely alive completely aligned with reality not in sleep whereas he said paradoxes can exist there's no commitment to truth I could be here I could be there I could see this I could see the opposite and it all works in sleep my internal uh he says in a completely different place it's it's it's not guided by truth it's not guided by clarity things are not really functioning and that's all a state in which a person lives and yet they're fully alive and they don't even know that. They don't even know that they're asleep. But and the med says that the heart of the Jewish people is Hashem. Hashem is called it says in so the med says Hashem is so what that means is that when their heart is awake the king is awake. Hashem is awake. The heart is awake. And as a result of that awakening that creates the in the next chapter he began to say what does it say right after that? What is it that the heart feels? What is it that that heart that is not asleep? It hears the sound of doi. And here's the sound of Di knocking on the door. And is saying open up the door for me and gives four words, four expressions. So the Reb said that comes from the word. The word in represents friendship like you did is me to my beloved represents a term of love, deep affection. So means the the infinite love that comes from the to the was the main focus we learned that there's a love and the love is rooted where it's rooted in the essence of hashem it's rooted in atmos and that means it's not just rooted in a certain energy or a certain light or a certain frequency or a certain world or a certain dimension and therefore or it is transactional or it's temporary or it's external but that love is rooted in the ultimate place of MS and the ultimate place of etsim of atmos which is built in and the ultimate source of reality there is that love and what's that love directed to it's not directed towards an external part it's directed to your essence the love of the and because of that love he says despite the fact that there may have been mistakes and stumblings and sins and transgressions and he violated the path. Not only that, he may be missing and absent of all the madreas all the levels and all of the aspects as he said not only is he not a he's also not only not only not but not which he's going to explain later what these all four things mean. Nonetheless, despite all of that, you could think that there's some uh compromise or some weakness in the love. So he says, "No, he's pounding on the door." It's like pis what does pisky mean? Pisky means open up or to put it in simple I want to be with you. Open I don't want the blockage here. Piskily opens because I want you. I want you and I want to be with you not in a transaction. I want to be with you because of something else. Thehat is that it's my to yours that it's the connection itself that is the deepest element here. Nothing else. So all I want is open up. Open up meaning open up so that I can be with you and you could be with me. And that's the says I love you. And the Jew right away says I'm just like in this moment or in this mat it's exactly the same. So therefore you would think that there's no so he says no in this state the is exactly with its full core core because it's an aa that comes from atmos. It's an aa that comes from the core that never changes. It's not something that is a certain dimension or a certain time or a certain situation. It's in the deepest core of reality which is the source of all reality. Talking here the source of atmos is the source of all reality. You can't even call it a source because it doesn't have any definition. And that's where the love is. And it's to a place in you that is forever that it's eternal. So it's not like you could lose it. The etsim doesn't change. Of course I could make mistakes. I could cover it up. I could be asleep. That's true. So my consciousness I may not be connected with my etsim. But the fact is that atmi is something that is the core. It's the essence of everything. And because it's essence, it's not something that's going to be subjected and it's not vulnerable to change or or to say I I lost my you can't lose your etsum. The eye that I could try to lose my but the eye that tries to get rid of my doesn't have access to that space of reality. So the etsum is there. It's true. So now he continues what does the words mean? And this now the whole as I said last time we gave the whole introduction how works very fundamental stuff's idea of what love is and all that. So he now goes in what every word here what what does say what does this how does this love speak obviously are metaphors. So every word here is saying something to describe this love and he goes through what he starts off with. The first is then Which is also interesting to use four different terms, right? Open up the doors. Enough. No. And then he's going to continue afterwards. >> Huh? The continues when does it come out? What what does the pounding? What does the knock feel like? What is the experience that the soul hears? The liby the heart hears. It hears two words. Pis open up for me. means open up for me. Explanation is this is a very famous medish. There's different versions of this medish but this medish is already brought here on the Pash and in other places this is a very famous mede says what does say I don't need you to open a a huge breach I don't need you to open an expansive door means the is the point the sharp point like is the point of the sword is a needle is the point of the needle, the edge of the needle. So that's what I want you to open up. I want you to open up for me an opening, a hole, a cavity, a space. Literally, it means when you take the point of a needle and you you prick you prick let's say a sweater or or a garment, whatever it is, how big is the hole? Tiny tiny invisible. That's how much like the hole created by the by the by the by the by the point the sharp point of a needle. What am I going to open up for you? But the the door of the ulam the door going into the mik. It was like a a corridor before the it why does I say that? Because that was the largest opening in the ba mikt. It was 40 amus in its height and 20 ammus in its width. And it didn't even have doors. So it remained open. All the other rooms had doors so they were closed. Shalulum the 40 I think 40 in its height. So that's approximately uh between 60 and 80 ft and 20 in its width. So that's approximately 30 or 40 feet. So you're dealing with a very large door and there were no doors. It was an opening. So you open up a hole that's tiny is tiny. But there's a safer called the kardunis which literally means pillar of darkness from of the balv's grandson the bump had a daughter and had a son of majush. She also had a son and she had a daughter Fagger who was the mother of just for the little history but one of the her son was of they called him of he says over there it's very interesting says when speaks about the Jewish people he says ah it's so beautiful your tense so Rashi brings from the medish from the and that the beauty of Jewish tents is that they didn't have the doors the opening parallel to each other. So if I open my tent and you open your tent, we don't see into each other and that represents modesty is respect. That's that they understand and appreciate the value of privacy, of discreetness, of modesty. You don't have to look into somebody else's tent. talking about and the Jewish people their openings are not parallel to each other usually. Yeah. I open up for you a big door then you'll open up for me a big door. He says here it's not says you can open up a tiny little opening it's not fear their openings are not parallel to each other. So that's what the medit. interesting here in I looked at the med this morning says I'm going to open up for you doors like huge huge openings this is other places in midrash so that's the open >> oh very good very good so it says do you say maybe it means the eye of the needle which is the hole >> in the needle >> inside the needle on the other side on the other side of the point where you put the thread through. So that we're going to see now. Very good. Good question. Yeah. If you look through med two different versions one of it's also from the old midrash also known as over there gives a different gear he says comes from the word right like a means a So over there the gear says not which literally means like the hole of the needle, the eye of the needle. Yeah. at the end of the needle you have a you have a hole a cavity an open hole and through that you pull through the the the thread but the virgin that's brought in beginning from the alter whenever he quoted this he would bring a different gear and that's the ga from what's You see 38 is 41 is it's in what's the difference? So you could think it's the same thing. He says no no no no no. In Yiddish he said is the in the nud is the spits from the n. The in the n is the eye of the needle through which you put the thread in is the spits the the the pointed edge of the needle the point of the needle. So you say what's the difference? The point is a tiny little hole. What's the difference point? That's the whole point. Just open up a little tiny hole. So either it's the hole created by the point of the needle or it's the hole that you have in the in in in in the in the at in the needle itself through which you put the thread. The bottom line it's a tiny hole. It's not a big hole. The thread doesn't need big holes. It needs a little tiny through which you put the thread. In other words, just create a little opening is an earlier. So that should be the but it's not the brought in is so the says that there's a fundamental difference between the two. It's not another it's a fundamental difference. What's the difference? is a the hole in the needle has a it has a space because you need the thread to go through it even if the thread the the strand is cuter it's narrow it's thin it's very thin so you don't need a big hole you need a tiny little hole because it's a tiny little thread true but it's a threat And the thread needs to get through because that's the point. You're using the needle in order to sew let's say a button to a jacket or whatever it is. You want to connect one thing to another thing. And as a result, what you call it, right? Sewing one of them of so you need that should have somehat some space to be able to get through the thread even if it's a tiny narrow thin thread. You're talking about the the point of the needle, the over there. It's different. The needle gets narrower and narrower and shorter and shorter and thinner until it becomes that the only the only the only uh the step afterwards is eph which is nothingness. So we don't have that mitz of ephes obviously but that's the in it's a small mitus but it's a mitsus it's a the point is it gets narrower and nar and narrower until you hit so to speak the border of ephes of of of zero of nothingness that's what ephes is >> from a lot of concentration of matter to singular atom >> yeah yeah yeah so this would be a this would be a metaphor Yeah, you have a larger concentration of atoms. And here here you hit like a single single point like you say like a single atom. Yeah, like a single cell until you can't get there's nothing afterwards because afterwards I have nothing to say because it's but till that point we're getting till that point and after that it's not the it's small but it's a it's a because it's it's functioning for the threat to go through here the is you're trying to it becomes so concentrated huh Huh? >> Very good. >> Very good question. >> You can actually make a hole somewhere else. >> You're right. The hole is that itself with the you make a hole somewhere else. With the with the point, you make a hole. You prick. you you penetrate something. It's tiny but you can make a hole. So what does this mean? So what's the here? So he says this is the this is the depth of so represents what we call the surrendering of the soul the surrendering of the ego completely. then this of surrender doesn't have a it doesn't have it's not it's not a space it's not is also a big deal you're creating that opening but that's an opening where there's there's real there's no what what do we mean here there's no explanation with the intellect of the brain it's not something that is appreciates and analyze and dissects. You could say okay I'll be not but an explanation on an emotional level. There's no explanation emotionally. You could say okay maybe there's different frequencies of reality that get that that that are being explained here. No, there's no explanation in any other. So what? Yeah. The real of it's means like the point of an there's no length. There's no breadth and there's no depth at all. This is that the person completely surrenders without any hispas without any expansiveness. It's as we said it's it's the closest you get to e. So there's no there's no structure to it. Even the smallest structure, there's no structure to it. It's complete complete disintegration of everything we would call our identity and reality. You know, true true death of the ego. So you'd say, oh, so it's not really anything. It's audas. There's no there's nothing but it's an where everything is there and he's completely inside there his whole and his whole and that's why it's only because everything is there everything is there and just like the hole there the point of a needle this creates a hole what what does it burst It it it it creates a in the iron wall which separates between the between the Jewish soul and their father in heaven. This creates it burst through it. It ruptures it burst the bubble you like you put the needle in the balloon and boom. This this is what creates. This is what means and this creates the reciprocal opening of it is an tremendously expansive opening. But it begins with what? >> Huh? I love the expression. >> Boom. >> Exactly. Exactly. I also thought about that. Yeah. >> American Jews always think that was because >> Exactly. >> behind. >> Exactly. Yeah. So Churchill, I think, is the one who who gave the phrase the iron curtain of the Soviet Union. Huh? >> No. for the Soviet Union after the war after the second world war and that's the expression the gar says yeah it's an expression so here the is that this this there's nothing there but that is what creates the ne that theel can't exist anymore and once there's That hole now ultimately already the whole falls off. So you have but what you need is that hole that opening once that hole shows the vulnerability of the it's not real that it's that it's not it's not ultimate reality and what what bursts it what destroys it what penetrates it. What's the of these two? What's the difference of of what's the what's the difference? Huh? Very good. Pun intended. Yeah. What's the point? Yeah. There's the eye of the needle and there's the point of the needle. Yeah. The in the nud and the spitz from the nule. So the difference is the first type of ms of surrender is he says it's with mitsus. You can describe it. Even a tiny hole, but you can describe it. That's what it is. It has its identity. It's true. It's a It's a humble identity. It's not uh it's not loud. It's not egotistical. It's not arrogant. It's very very humble. It's very small. You know, it's only allows for a thread to go through. You can't put it other things. But nonetheless, it has its it has its shape. It has its in it has its mits. You have a big house, you have a small house, but it has a mitsas. And that's what that definition is. Is touching here. It's the closest you get to the border of Mitsus and not Mitsus. In other words, it's as much as Mitsus could come to not Mitsus. Right? He says smaller smaller smaller narrow and narrower. The step after that is fading away into oblivion eff into nothingness. So this is the like the border between mitsas and not mitsas that border for mitsas to face its own border. That's midnafish. That's the deepest midnafish because mitsus means reality identity however you want to define it spiritual physical. for Mitsus to face the eff of Mitsus. That's the deepest midn. And that's why whenever a person gets to that space, Mitsus will revolt in every possible way. Usually two ways. Either threatening you that this is going to be the moment of death or the moment that you're going to become insane. The common denominator in both is don't go there because Mitsus feels threatened by for its very identity and therefore it will use every single last bullet and ammunition in its bag in its baggage in order to prevent you from there. You want to change your mits I have no problem one yesesh another yesesh but but to go to the pace of e zo that not now you're tampering with the very structures of identity you want to expand your structures fine you want to go to a deeper no problem with that I'll help you from one yesh to another yes to another yes you want to become smaller you want to become more humble you want to become more spiritual you want to be more receptive I'm good with That's not nef means the surrender of the last vestage of mits the true true death of the ego and for the ego death of the ego if you wanted to be you want to become a bigger ego through ego death that I'm good you're such a good guy that you even have an ego death you're completely you're transparent you're like amazing you're not defensive you're like the best guy in town to fabang with because you're just like an You're an open You're an open faucet of inspiration. Okay, ego. Okay, ego. You're so amazing. Yeah, you have that's and it could be in very very big mad. It's not necessarily it could be very very deep is you're touching eff and that's why he said there's no espas there's no espas there's no beard in there's no beard in mid there's not even a beard in a husband every beard and hes is something that the ego grasps to give it some context to give it some explanation to give it some structure to justify it I need you to justify it you know it's like a business plan you want a spiritual business but I need you to justify it the is it's you can't even say this in words. It's not like it's I'm going to say more words, more words. I'm just telling you that I can't even say it in words. Huh? No, because you understand why I can't say it in words. Another explanation. Another explanation, right? It it it's audas. There's nothing to write. It's not I'm not g I'm not putting in context. It's not transactional. It's not for this. It's not growth. It's not another madrega. not another schlam is you're going to reach madregus you're going to be a deeper madre it's not any madus here and e doesn't have a seer doesn't have it and and this is what mus this is the surrender this is the pis in many ways when you look at it you're not seeing a so he says but it's the whole is there the holy is there because it's an of e so therefore Everything is there but it's not there in a way that you own it that you grasp it and that's the and this is what creates a this is what changes the posture from and that's why the gear that brings them is always not but it's a whole different it's a whole different their hair in what they in what what real surrender looks like. >> No, this is this is what that's what mean. What am I asking for? Yeah, I'm asking the pisi that's the duki. That's the opening. It's not a shift of consciousness to another madrega to another level. That's all nice. It's all good stuff. We're not being but that's not the of the change of the change what we said before a person could be a whole life asleep. And what that means is that my entire consciousness is literally like the consciousness of somebody who's asleep and never wakes up. And I don't even know that there's anything else. Like I told you before, I don't even know there's anything else. Like imag literally imagine that you person sleeps their entire life. I gave you the mushroom we've learned in the other mime when it was at I think about the the chicken the egg and the chick never comes out of the egg. And that is reality. Nothing there. It's not sound not like it's not a joke and I never come again. We we all our malam we know it from the other perspective. So it's like a cute mush. Yeah. The chicken is an egg for 21 days and then you come out of the egg. No, no, you never come out. There's nothing in my consciousness that takes me out of it. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. Whenever you talk about contrasts, you're already in a much more liberated place. You can already say, "Oh, this versus this." It's not really the metaphor. The real metaphor is that not the contrast. The metaphor is that I am in that state and that is the only state that exists. And that's what gullis means. That's what we have to at least we have to understand this on some level that our entire life we could be in this place you know and those who who who those who are engaged in in deep emotional spiritual work sometimes reach a place where you're like it's like literally you woke up from a coma it's like oh my god 50 years 50 years sleep 50 years sleeping and it's not that you were sleeping and you weren't productive here we're talking about very productive you made money you were successful ful. You built a career. You built a life. Maybe you built a you built you built and a lot of good things too. A lot of good things too. It's not like you weren't sleeping and making you made a couple of in the process usually, but but a lot of good things happen during sleep. Good dreams. Good dreams. >> Huh? 2,000 years of the person it's almost like it's breathtaking and it's not a realization where okay, I made a mistake yesterday. It's a it's a paradigm shift of infinite magnitude. That's the word. A paradigm shift of infinite magnitude. It's not a paradigm shift where okay this fine I have to upgra. It's not an upgrade. What creates that shift? He says it's it's until I'm not until the soul doesn't go into it's just going to be you know incremental what is it called incremental uh changes and upgrades in this and this is this is a very very deep emotional question. It's even deeper than an emotional question and that is are you ready for the disintegration of every single thing that you ever consider to be real? That's what is paradigm shift awakening. >> Yeah. An awakening of infinite magnitude. Yeah. Because paradigm shift again is Yeah. We'll go from here. We'll go to there. You know, we'll change the color of the car. We'll do a makeover in the house. We'll get a new granite counter and redo the kitchen and the roof. And once we're at it, we'll put in a jacuzzi. >> Huh? >> Quantum leap. Yeah. So is it's small. It's humble. It's powerful. But is there's no there's no there's nothing to means there's there's a there's a space I call my own. This is it's my it's my little container. It's small. It's humble. It's it's open, but it's it's my it's my little container. But don't take that away. It's a little thread. I don't need I'm not asking for I'm not asking for a big hole. I just need my little thread to go through. That's it. And I have my little thread. But that nud I'm not going to give away. That nud I'm not ready to give that away. >> Yeah. Over there there's going to be control. The real of nephesh is the real surrender is the surrendering even of the mid neph experience. So what's there? You don't have anything to write home about. He says it's audas. What do you mean there's no? There's no expression to it. Like somebody will ask you, you know, what did you do over there? Right? You don't have an answer. I didn't do anything. Oh, I told you you're wasting your time. I didn't do anything. There's there's nothing. What? You made money? No. You made new friends. Maybe. Whatever. I mean what what it was right but but but the but but he says and that nud is everything because there's no espous so you have your whole etsum over there you have a whole because that's where the is expressed yours is comes out and what's that is called so >> well yeah I mean she's the one who created the whole Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This is what Esther represented. Yeah. >> Yeah. Vanity of In a sense, >> exactly. >> Yeah. >> Right. >> Yeah. Is not just a it's the ultimate king and it's load and there's an element of a and from there everything changed. Ultimate sacrifice. >> Yeah. >> There's nothing left. >> Yeah. Yeah. Even the word sacrifice is is is is not so much the point. >> Yeah. Yeah. It's not. Yeah. Because you know, sacrifice could be I'm sacrificing everything. Put it on my tombstone. >> Yeah. Yeah. Right. The ultimate. Yeah. So that's that's when the person confronts the ultimate reality of ephes and is ready to to go there. Huh? >> You can't >> you can't cash it. There's nothing to cash. So somebody what are you doing? What are you doing? Like I need some espressos. What? What? What's the wealth that you gathered? New information? No. You became smarter? No. You became more famous. No. You became more successful. No. >> Yeah. You became you became you became happier. So the truth is Yeah. You become much happier. Huh. >> As a result. >> As a result. Yeah. But there's no there's no here. >> There's no Yesh anymore. Yeah. And that's really why you become happier because the source of all happiness is that's the source. So when there's so then of course you have a nef but it's a different it's a it's it's not of separateness. It's a nefes because of complete surrender >> in a sensei everything goes back to basilani. This is the PK. This is actually the PK of Basili. It's the same. It's literally the same verse. It's not is the next after basili. It's chapter 5. But what do you mean? It goes back to basil. >> Oh, the the Ghani, the garden. Yeah. >> The Tog. Yeah. >> They gave up their entire essence because they wanted this connection to >> Yeah. saying, "Here's the come to me." Physically, it looked like they died, but really they were just same with it. She gave up her life to live with the non-Jewish. >> Thank you. after this of now comes the next step. What's the next step is he gets now to the details who should be who what's this? So he says now he gets to the details to the through which you start experiencing the opening that flow of relationship that flow of connection which is completely expansive. It started off with but it ends up so you see the paradox. One second. You said has no and how does it end up once you touches now the relationship is extremely expansive because it's based on the now here we also have in the usually is that the point of a needle where is the hole rabb said the answer is because the point makes a hole. So doesn't really make sense like is very open up a hole as big as the eye of a needle. The point of a needle doesn't have a hole. So you have to explain doesn't but it makes a hole. That's why you have to touch right. But here we have a whole new depth. It's not just the hole that it makes. It's doesn't have a hole. It's that's the that's what but through that you create a hole in so the it's a which doesn't have a there's no there's no openness here it's of but that creates the and from this opens up and for here he decided four things that after the There's my sister, there's we'll see what means literally my spouse my love and is my completion or my twin. So this of means a book in Yiddish the the people that would write the so they were they were called because they were like a manuscripts that were like you had a book let's say called bookis was one of the of I told you once he was a very big madak whenever would start rolling in the middle of a mime he would roll after him so you shouldn't miss any words and sometimes in his you see a few words are missing thing because he missed a few words turned while used to sometimes start rolling in the middle of my he took a turn and he missed it so he wouldn't fill it in. He would leave it blank. He was a very big mad. So there's a called and uh over there explains and it's he says that is a little different than the term my sister represents that comes from the arousal of the natural embedded love. represents the relationship between siblings. The love between a brother and a sister, between sisters is not something that you need to explain. It's not something that needs understanding. It's not something that you need to comprehend and it's not something you have to prove. It's it's natural. Why am I connected to my sister? I'm connected to my sister because she's my sister. You say, "No, because she's successful. cuz she's an interesting person. That's not my sister. You're connected to your sister cuz your sister is always going to be your sister and your brother is always going to be your brother. Unfortunately, we all know that there can also be fights in a family. That's sad. But the po that's not obviously we know that. But the point is that the love in a healthy family between siblings is not something that is based on a husband and a kesh and you have to invent it. It's something what we call it's it's it's it's genetic. It's embedded in our DNA. this is my sister. In other words, we come from the same womb. We come from the same father. We come from the same mother. So, we are intrinsically connected. And even siblings who don't talk to each other, they still have to sit sh for each other. Why? Because they're connected. >> And that's why they don't talk to each other. Exactly. Exactly. Very good. >> Yeah. No, very good point. Well taken. You mean because they're so close so they hurt each other. Yeah. Yeah. But here he's talking of course in the positive. You're right. So even the negativity is part of the positivity. If there was no connection, there was no connection. If you were just a stranger, fine, whatever. Here it's very deep. But the point is that it's an it's it's a natural love. It's not something it's not like in marriage. The kadesh is in marriage. It's not a natural love. You weren't born with this person. You have to choose it. And as much as you choose it, you can also unchoose it. That's the concept of divorce. You cannot divorce your sister. You can unfortunately have a difficult stressful relationship, but you can't divorce them. Why? Because you didn't create the relationship. You can't uncreate the relationship. You didn't create it. It's part of your DNA. You're always going to be siblings. That's how it is. You're always going to be connected. And there's something that siblings know about each other in a very deep way because they grew up together. You know, they they saw each other running around with with without diapers. You know what I mean? And they also know all the mishagasan in the house from a deep place, right? Every family has its idiosyncrasies. They know their mother well. They know their father. They just this there's there there's a connection there that's very deep. It's true sometimes siblings evolve in different ways and you know the old relationship like has to pave way for a much deeper relationship and sometimes it doesn't work always but essentially you're talking about a very deep relationship. So says is the it doesn't need a husband. It doesn't need a it's like why what if my sister calls me up middle of the night she needs something. Why should I help her? It's a foolish question. Why? Cuz she's going to pay me back. No, because this is what you do for a sister. This is what you do for a brother. That's what it's not. You don't need a Hezb for it. Just like you do it for yourself. says this is the you're talking about the beginning of the person was asleep. What's the beginning? So in the beginning of when the person doesn't have anything what do we mean they don't have anything? Not that they don't have anything that they're worthless. He says the person has which transformed them from one extreme to another extreme. So doesn't have anything means in terms of expansiveness. What they have is that they they were ready to let go of everything and they were ready to disintegrate. That's nef. >> Yeah. Yeah. It's a very it's just a very natural deep relationship and that by the way the word and where does it come from the word is you have Alexandri an Alexandrian not means a not when you're things why is not and the answer is because they're knotted together God chose these two people to be that's what family is family means you're knotted together why creation not because I chose you marriage is the opposite marriage you're not knotted together. You have to at some point in your life choose to be knotted together and then sometimes people choose to be unnotted. That's what a divorce is. You connect and you could separate is God chose the knot. He made the knot. You're not it here. Here you are family. And everybody knows there's no love like family and there's no fights like family, right? It's works both ways because they're kned together. Like you can't separate. So that's and so what's is the first thing Hashem calls us is my sister. Why my we're sisters of God because that represents you're not a together. So in the beginning of a that's what you have to know. You have to know that you are divine. So at at this point where the person has nothing besides the death of their ego completely everything was disintegrated. They became that's what means that's the are you ready that everything you knew about your life and everything you held on to with your dear life and your dear ego and your dear imagination you're ready to let everything go everything could disintegrate without that there's no this this pis doesn't exist this is a pis where you're ready to face eff and that means everything gets thrown into eff All in. Yeah. >> Just one second. One second. >> You don't have to be sorry. It's fine. I just I just want to finish the sentence. So the is that this this is why it's called because it's it's not sophisticated. It's not sophisticated. It's not a more sophisticated form of life. If you're looking for more sophistication, go to This is it's it's audas there. It's not more sophisticated. So what's the motivation? The motivation is you can't there's no motivation. If you're looking for a motivation, the motivation is that it's MS. That's the mot but that's not a motivation. The has an expression that is he does truth because it's true. What's the reason? Give me a reason because it's true. Why do I need truth? But if the dam is going to explain that, I don't have anything to say. If you don't understand, if it's not a motivation, fine. I have nothing to say. I'm going to have no I'm not giving you. So, I don't know what to say because it's what what's the real I remember he said is not it's not a reason. It's not I'm doing truth. SO, I HAVE TRUTH. SO I COULD TELL you by the way I have truth. It's not mip with a reason. It's you could say it's another reason because I'm a truthful guy. So I'm not a fake guy. I'm a real guy. So that's what that's not what is saying because it's em. So there's nothing else. >> Yeah. It's not it's not a reason. It's not a reason. It's because because in the there's MS because that's what you are because you're MS. >> Yeah, it's efficient. >> Yeah. >> In other words, if it's all about the attraction, you know, MS is is is It happens to me that MS is more attractive than other things. That's true. But but if that's what I'm looking for, I'm not going to find that truth. I'm looking to be more attractive. So So it's it's another form of ego. It's just taking on different shapes. So, so this is an in we are ready to dis ready for complete disintegration that's he's saying he says here in the beginning of he doesn't have anything when when you say that you understand what he means he doesn't have anything in other words because all I have is that I lost everything that's what I have and that's a very painful moment but because he doesn't have anything therefore before he can get to everything but not from a place of ego. So the first step is that I have nothing. I let go of everything. Why? Because I went to I surrendered everything. There's nothing that I'm holding on to that I need to hold sacred because this is what used to be. So every single even relationships, connections, uh convictions, things I was dedicated to, things I was building, I literally let go of everything and surrender it all to the of from now from here starts building. What's build first is what's that you're essentially connected. >> Josh, what do you want to say? I'm sorry. I just wanted to finish my train of thought. >> It's such an incredible You can't get better. You can't get better than Yeah, >> that's what it is. And that pricks, that's what penetrates the penetrates. There's no anymore. And you know it. You know it. You can experience it. There's like a is like this iron curtain that literally blocks the flow. It's like and my whole identity ex exists on the other side of the Iron Curtain. And there's no connection. Which is why they call the Soviet Union the Iron Curtain because there's no connection. Every letter that you send will be read. Every package that you send will be scrutinized and the people can end up in the gulach. Nothing goes through. There's nothing. It's an iron curtain. Nothing goes through. You're on the other side of the curtain, you know, like the Berlin wall and that's where you stay. There's no connection. Only what is monitored by the by the by the tyrants, by the dictators. They monitor the connection and emotionally what that means is like my entire identity is on the other side of the but in the pi forever there's a hole in that it's already oh wow it's literally that the egg cracked it literally that crack and light came in just a tiny bit of light but light came in and the moment that light comes in it's unrecognizable you're in a different mitz it's completely different mitz now the person says but I have nothing. So he says no what's means you were born brothers and sisters you're connected. So he says what starts awakening is that there's a natural love. It's a it's an inheritance. It's your DNA. You don't have to create this. You don't have to be a bal Madreas for it. is an avut embedded hidden love which is an inheritance that comes from a was one and he inherited this. It's like a genetic mutation so to speak that happened with a spiritually that the soul has an auterous thousand mistakes. Still my brother and sister. Family is family. Why? Because you're essentially connected. That's the and that's something that is embedded in your nature and essence and you cannot obliterate it even if you want to. So that's that's the first >> yeah this is called it's embedded even if it's concealed my entire life I may not know about my brother and sister but they're still my brothers and sisters and you see in a moment of crisis right people are there for their I mean hopefully people there for their sisters and brothers you say yeah but we didn't talk and there's issues and I don't agree fine you don't agree and you have this but it's still your sister my sister calls me up 3:00 in the morning, I'm stuck somewhere. You go help your sister. Why? Why? Because it's your sister. That's what it is. That's what a person does. You don't need an explanation for it. It's it's it's it's in the core of your consciousness. So, what is what is the saying here that this is the first in a what does it mean to you have a relationship with Hashem? Relationship with Hashem means you're essentially connected. It's not it's not sophisticated. You don't this but it's beyond. This is you're knotted together. There's a deep deep deep deep connection in relationship. This is who you are. This is what you love. You say, "No, but there's a lot of pain in my life and there's disappointment in my life and I've been turned off." Good questions and bait. Either we'll have an answer, we won't have an answer. But it doesn't take away from the fact that this is a connection that you don't only seek. It's a connection that's there and that's why you seek it. It's very painful to be estranged from family. Yeah. People who are estranged from family know that there's pain there. Now one of the ways we deal with that pain is we say we don't need the connection but that's not a real way of dealing with pain. We all do that. A lot of us do it because we don't want to feel the pain. But the pain of family estrange from each other is a very deep pain. Sometimes people don't always have a choice. That's that's the reality. And maybe it's the best whatever I don't you know the circumstances are different in every situation. You can't always reconcile every relationship. We hope you could but some relationships are difficult or challenging. And sometimes there's very painful things that happen and you know people are not ready to be accountable. So I'm not judging a strangement. We're not saying there's pain in a strange and you have to pay tribute to it. You have to pay tribute to it. There's grief over there. That's why we sit you know there's shiva. What's shiv? There's grief. There's there's physical death and there's emotional death. There's physical estrangement and there's emotional estrangement. Sometimes people are dead even when they're alive. There are orphans who are orphans even when they have parents. Right? So it's important to pay tribute to that. There's says one has to sit sh there's a why is there a because it's an amputation. So emotionally when a family is estranged from each other there's a deep pain there. So what the reb is saying is when I'm estranged from Hashem it's it's a brother and sister that I'm not speaking to each other. So you say yeah but I can't get along with my sister. I can't get along with okay I hear but there's a pain over there because the na the relationship is a natural relationship. It's embedded in who you are. It's an and that you don't have to create. It's not through. This is who you are. It's who you are. That's the first thing. There's another which is connected to this is a very interesting med also in it says in we have a little sister and she's not yet developed before puberty. And the says it's talking about au who grew up without in an environment of complete paganism and he is defined in the as my sister says the medish why is he called a sister. So says amazing the word I told you comes the word which means nodded. He is the one who knotted all of the citizens of the world with Hashem is called because he connected the world with Hashem. It says he called out in the name of Hashem. The God he planted he planted a orchard inv. And he called out in the name of hem the god of the world. And here so fascinating here it should have said like in English the god of the world actually in English they don't translate it right means god the world that doesn't make sense god the world the god of the world like we say the king of the world the god of the doesn't say that so the says that's the whole this grammatical mistake in the is not a mistake it's telling you what was he's the first one to teach that it's not the world is a and no The whole mitas of is kale. It's not two separate things. Ka god the world that's the world gave a whole new definition for reality which is not a new he was defining what real reality is that's the of that's the depth of it's not the medish he nodded the world to god okay because what does a real knot mean? A real knot means that the two are revealed to be inseparable. That's what a knot means by a knot means two things were separate. You connect them through a knot. But spiritually knotting two things together means you reveal that they're not two. That's what did >> Yeah. Is not the god of the world, which is nice. There's a god. He's in control. Monotheism. Everybody say invented montheism, but that's not the vert. Monotheism is there's a creator. There's no billion creators. He's control. He's infinite. That's not a vert means the ism. The mits is of is not two separate realities. And that's what a that's what brother and sister means spiritually speaking. Brother and sister if you go back to the source you'll find the eggs the the the the mother the the the the seed and the egg of the father and mother in in in in the space of the brother and sister. If you go back back back back back back back back back back back back back back. What are you going to you're coming to the father and mother. That's what it really is. Yes, it developed the cell of the father, the cell of the mother developed into an embryo and you know trillion cells, but really it's one mitas. It just it huh what? >> The Russians the Russians like to speak blunt. >> The Russians like to be blunt, but the iron curtain. They don't have an iron curtain. The Americans have an iron curtain. No, no. Yeah. What's that? >> No. Cuz he was teaching thus is >> huh? >> Or is it? >> Yeah. Yeah. >> That's why the most spiritual people they fascinated by the world. >> Of course. >> Everything in the world is fascinated. >> It's not he's the god of the world. the the problem of God, the problem of of understanding God is the moment you call him God, that's your issue already. In other words, faith in God is is is is almost atheism. >> You don't believe. >> Yeah. Yeah. The the problem with God is the word God. Even if you talk about God, that's the problem. That's what was teaching. You're missing the whole point. There's God. So, there's a table and there's a cup and there's me and then there's God. Okay? God is big. I don't know him. I don't have names for him. He's undefined. Fine. It's all nice, but you you're you you're already barking up the wrong tree. You're barking up the wrong tree because you don't know what the tree is. So Kam is the re revealing that the whole mitus of isos. >> It's also dangerous by the way. >> So you're saying this sounds like Spinosa. Ver fine. What's the explanation in this explains in the second section of is following that more length. If not for the means the divine activating energy inside every creation without that if from the heaven and earth would depart the energy of Hashem that gives them life and sustains them and creates them. The says that through the word of Hashem, heaven was created and through the breath of his mouth all of its legions. So if that would have departed from creation, so the whole reality of heaven and earth and anything else existing would revert to no thingness just as it was before creation. Moving from this we understand that every moment creation needs to be renewed like we say in every day continuously he renews creation. explain when it says every day it doesn't mean once a day means every day constantly every day every just like in the beginning of creation just like the beginning creation everybody understands you need a because naturally it's this happens every single moment of creation so it's not that there's two separate things there's a universe and there's hashem and hashem creates the universe when you understand the depth there is That beetsum since without the kayak bifl there's no nifl the whole nifl is really an embodiment of the kayak being manifested which is why it has to be every single moment. So the whole bria is a manifestation of the kayak the divine energy in it because it is and that's why it has to be created every single moment. >> What video >> very good Remind me. >> You tell you sent me once a video. >> At every moment there must be something holding it all together. At every moment there must be something holding it all together sustaining it. >> You're right. previous. >> Yeah, sent me a video a few weeks ago, a few months ago was so somebody was he was an atheist and a professor or a scientist and he was explaining how we all see in life like everything that exists is being held up by something, right? This cup is now being held up by my hands. But what about my hands? What about my hands? what my hands were just always here and they have this ability to hold oh my hands are being held up by uh by um by my shoulders right which are being held up by my spine by my back which are being held up by my legs but one second oh my legs were just always here so my legs are being held up actually you know by the earth and he says if you go further and further and further all of reality everything is being held up by a by a previous reality that is a foundation for it and you go deeper and deeper and deeper Yeah. What is the source holding it all up? And and it never stops because you go back further further further. You go to the earth and you go deeper into the earth and deeper into the earth. Then then that's the planet and then you have the entire universe and it goes further and further and ultimately you this is this is the benl and if that kayak for a moment you know goes on vacation right if my legs decide I'm not holding you up and my hands are not holding up so what happens to a cup of coffee boom so everything is being held up both for its existence and for its maintenance for its functionality every single so it's not that God was involved involved but it's it's the point I think right >> he gets very very very specific sustaining >> right every moment >> every single moment yeah >> it must be >> doesn't know what it is >> right >> so that's the and that's not it's not it was it's every single and because it's every single so that means it's not a separate reality it's not two separate things and that's the idea of That that is the mitus of the I just want to add one more detail just to take it one step deeper. We spoke about those ones I mean a few times but just to give a mushel just to see it's saying something even deeper and that is that uh just imagine okay Dr. Yakov Brower was a professor McGill University of neuro neuroscience. So he has a book called something from nothing where he discusses this at length. So he gives a beautiful mushel over there. It's actually a mushel in Tanya chapter 48. But he applies this to this beautifully. He says imagine you know a person is uh I don't know you're sitting at a class let's say and it's boring. You start daydreaming. You know people's daydreams are very interesting. Yeah. I don't know if you ever focused on your daydreams, but you when you wake up from it, it's like, "Oh, wow. That was interesting." And in a daydream, you can imagine yourself anywhere in the world. You can imagine yourself on an airplane. You can imagine yourself in a stadium, at a large event. You can imagine yourself shopping. You can imagine yourself at a meeting, wherever you want. And in your daydream, you can actually see the place. You can even smell. You can even see the people. You can even feel the reactions of the people. A daydream could be extremely extremely specific and granular. And it has emotions. It has excitement. You can even get anxious in your daydream or excited in your daydream or get upset at your daydream or get jealous. Like it has all the features that have in a night dream. You have in a daydream. >> Huh? >> Very, >> very, very vivid. And if it's a long sheer and the guy is not stopping, you continue with your daydream. Yeah. You could travel to Australia, first class, you can go visit family, whatever it is, whatever you want to do. And you could put in your daydream as whoever you want. And then you wake up from the daydream. Okay, the teacher says, "Dismissed. Class is over. Back to reality. What happened to all the characters in the daydream?" He says, "They're all gone. Why are they gone? Where are they? Where are they? Why are they not there?" And you'll say, "Well, it's a foolish question." Because what does it mean they were there? What what were the what was there? You didn't have here independent people. Basically, all the characters in the daydream had no reality outside of me dreaming about them. It was the brain waves, the thought waves that created them, right? So, as long as I'm thinking about them, they're there. If I'm not thinking about them, they're not there anymore. Why are they not there? Because their reality never existed outside of my dream. Their entire reality was made up. The chemistry, the stuff that made up their reality was me thinking about them. So, if I'm not thinking about them, what do you want to be there? Their reality is nothing outside of my thoughts. Everybody understands that. And you're not expecting all these 30,000 people that were in the stadium and you actually saw them and you even saw a guy eating a hot dog with mustard and sauerkraut and ketchup. You saw it and the hot dog is not there. The 30,000 people are not there. Why? Because there was no reality outside of your thoughts. Everybody understands that. To put it in simple words, they were created from your thoughts. As long as you're thinking about them, they're here. As long as you're not thinking about them, they're not here. Essentially when you say the whole world was created yeseshme it means the world is divine energy. It's created from divine energy. That's what it is. It's a physical manifestation of divine energy. So as long as the divine energy is creating it, it's here. It's thinking about it. Right? Daycart said I think therefore I am. And alterba says God thinks therefore I am. God speaks therefore I am. Why is it called speaking not thinking? Because in my daydream, the characters never get and can't rebel against me. In this world, it's not like that. We look at a yesh and say, "No, no, no. I'm a yesh." That's why it's called speech because thought remains inside your domain. Speech already is something that goes out of my domain and you could plagiarize it and even re misconstrue my words and use it the way you want. So speech is a beautiful metaphor for something that has a dual identity. really it's nothing outside of the divine energy but in your imagination you could say I don't even know if God exists so it's not only Hashem is holding up the cup it means what is really the cup that's a little deeper than what he says you understand one is that the is constant and if not everything is doesn't exist this brings us to a deeper vart of and that is that it's not a separate mitz >> god is the cup >> yeah god is the I it looks like a cupe assumes a physical incarnation. That's what always talks about but it's all the question is what did looks like. Here it looks like a cup and here it looks like a tree and here it looks like an ant. And here it looks like a beer and here it looks like a squirrel and here it looks like my nose. And that's why in physics, by the way, the deeper you go into creation, the deeper you go into creation, the more you come to places that are completely intangible, mysterious and to the point of paradoxical because really you're getting closer and closer to the which is and is infinite. that it's a the creation is that the assumes a very finite reality to the point that I could look at the world and just say I don't know some physical thing but that itself is just the hashem that itself so it's not a separate m so it's not it's one that's what is that's what is there it's Maybe if I surrender then maybe I can find the true. >> Yeah. >> You can also interpret the I think >> I think therefore I am sometimes takes you away from who you are. It's only when I surrender my eye completely. >> That I could begin to experience who I AM BECAUSE IT'S GOD thinks therefore I am. >> Stop thinking. >> That's why BL >> is the only normal way to live. any other way to live is cuckoo. No, you it's really cuckoo and that's why it's torturous. Doesn't work. It's like investing all your money in a Ponzi scheme that never existed, never will exist. The only way you can actually be normal is through b cuz then you actually could become a mitas. Now you could okay now you bench. This is the this is the that's why it is and there's no way around it. No brain has yet invented all the Napoleons in the world and all the in the world and all the pharaohs in the world and all the Hitlers in the world who have never still not invented a mitas. That's not the tried terribly. They tried terribly and that's why they want to kill the Jews because the Jew reminds them that they're bottle and they can't stand it. >> Yeah. >> Jew. If you get rid of the Jew, you get rid of God, which means they can finally breathe and exist. And that's why they hate the Jews more than anything else. Because the once said at a faba, there's nothing that you hate like something that threatens the core of your mitsus. You're threatening my business, I don't like you. You're threatening my house, I don't like you. I'm going to when you threaten the core of my mitz, now you're enemy number one. And he says, the Jew threatens the core of Mitsus. That's that's dangerous. Of course I hate you. It's a different level of hate. It's like so but this is the whole so is the only real way because that means now you could be God thinks therefore I am. So the more I could surrender to God's thoughts and words I can be without that noas and the world feels it in a deep way and that's what au that's why they threw au into the fire because au was threatening the entire world order and that was his Indian. He was what is it called? An iconoclast. People who break u the word icon people who break the the foundations. In other words, the role of au was to reveal not. >> Huh? Who made? Yeah. Your t is the here. So this is this is very fundamental. Well, this is who came to the world and he introduced a whole new you're nodded. What does nodded mean? Nodded spiritually means that you're essentially one intrinsic oneness. In other words, you know, we talk about having a relationship with God. No, no, no. It's not a relationship. >> It's interesting the concept of entanglement also. It's like a sister because doesn't matter the distance. >> Exactly. If you the other one. >> So that when you have that in physics, when two things are entangled, they could be in other sides of the universe. Space doesn't matter. One spin, the other one spins. Why? Because they're essentially it's a brother. You know how twins I have I have I have somebody from our marriage that's a twin. And sometimes one person gets into they've told me one person gets into a depression. They don't know why because the other one is going through something. It's literally like you spin and the other one spins on the other side of the world. When you're deeply connected, you you affect and you get affected. So it's not you don't it's not you're not building a relationship. It's essential oneness. That's koam. And that's that we're a sister. That's called that's called >> Yeah. Whenever you take two things and you connect them together, it's called >> one. >> Becomes one, right? I know in physicality a knot, it's just a knot. But when we're talking here, it's like uh it's like you're saying when you melt silver or you melt gold and it they merge together. When you weld you weld them together, it merges completely one. You don't even see the separation. That's the Vart. Yeah. >> Huh? >> Fusion. >> Fusion, right? Fusion. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. He just adds here one more vert and we'll we're going to finish more just another few moments. There's something even deeper something even deeper that revealed. It's uh 412 1 2 3 4 5 seven lines from the bottom. Yeah. Six lines. Six lines from the top. deeper on a deeper level. You can this needs to go one step deeper. Creation is not just called Hashem's word. It's also called Hashem's desire. It says inim what he desired he did. So the true mitas of creation is not just his words, it's his desire, his why is creation sometimes called his words and sometimes called his desires. Say what's the difference? He wants he speaks. So he says it's a different strata of creation. It's a different way of defining the world. He's going to say now a short beer, but it's something very, very, very deep. I'm going to read it and translate. We'll touch on it and then we're going to continue tomorrow. The word desire is very, very, very meticulous. You see it by a person. Everything you could see in a person in the faculties of a person desire is different than all the other faculties of the soul. The soul has tremendous amounts of faculties. For example, cognitive faculties, the ability to conceive, to understand, to invent, to discover, to explain and many other faculties is different. All the faculties in a person, if you describe their identity, it's that they are a mitas of outside of the soul. The soul possesses characteristics, qualities, faculties, potentials. And therefore what they create is they create something that's outside of the person because you are you create what you are because their mitis is outside of the soul. The soul possesses certain faculties, abilities, characteristics. So what they create is also something outside of the person. They are outside. So they create something outside. For example, you have a person and he's immersed in an intellectual project and he has an epiphany. Is like an invention, a discovery, an epiphany falls into his mind and it like it changes something. It's a new equation. It's a new answer. It's a new explanation. It's a new idea. It's a new theory. Even after he stops his involvement with it, he may not sit with this for the rest of his life. The idea remains the idea that came into him that he conceived. He conceived it without not for his brain the world would have not known it. But it doesn't stop. It doesn't cease to exist after he stops. In fact, he may have died a thousand years ago. He may have written it down and it still may be the guidance for a whole a whole generation of people, right? Every invention, every technology, every theory that has been developed and it has not been refuted. Yeah. It still exists. And not only exists, we live based on it. You say the guy is dead. Fine. So what? THE GUY IS DEAD, BUT the ideas are not dead. He came up with something. True. If not for him, maybe we wouldn't have it. So we're very we're very we're very grateful. But the idea is a reality outside of him. I it came from his soul. It came from his soul. But what's the is something that the soul possesses outside of it and it creates something outside of it. And even without the reality of the person, it's still there. That's in another you have love or the opposite of love. He doesn't want to say hate but the same concept. When somebody did something that made great created goodness for another person but came from love even if the arousal of love is not there the goodness that was created will remain and it could remain for years it could remain for generations true it came from an experience of love and from a flow of love but even when that flow is gone maybe the person's attitude changed the relationship changed different times whatever it is the mitsas that was created is so it's true with it's true with mid and it's true with every single and it's based on this idea since the of the is something outside of the soul so therefore it creates something outside of the person desire no desire is different because not outside of the why The word comes from word. What is ratson? Ratson is the soul gravitates. It's the soul yearning. It's the soul desiring. It's not outside of the soul. Ratson is the soul taking on a certain shape. It's the soul. It's the soul searching. It's the soul inclined, gravitating. So it can't create something outside of a that's outside of the neph that's its creates something that's outside of the ne and it remains but the whole of is the itself. So it doesn't create something outside of the neat iss you have it. The moment the leaves it is gone. There's no outside of the just like if the soul departs from the desire, there's no desire. DESIRE IS I WANT. There's no want without I. If there's no I, there's no want. So the mitas that is, it's mitas is that I want it. And if I don't want it, there's no mitsas here. There's no mitsas outside of the rotus. >> So is a manifestation of the soul. >> Yeah. Ratson is the soul manifesting the soul the soul taking on a certain I want it's the soul gravitating the word from the word mirut it's like you're running in a certain direction you're going there you're running it's not a separate is the ability of the soul to create something that's a mitas a beautiful idea an amazing idea and that idea remains forever I my soul is not involved I'm not thinking about it I'm not involved so what it created something ratson does not creation anything. Why? Because rats is not outside of the ne. It's the neffesh itself. So it doesn't create anything outside of the ne. As long as I want, there's a mitz. If I don't want, it's not mitsus anymore. That is its significance. The significance is that I want. There's no other reality to it outside of I want. That's what real rats is. Now your rats may use to take it to the next step. So then the rats led to that's going to stay. I may have a deep desire to go into this work. Right? So the rats may feed the butts itself and its purity doesn't have a mitsas outside of the soul. And the moment you take away the rats and the mitsas goes away. Just like if you take away the nephesh the ratsen goes away because rats is just the shape of the soul. >> The idea is already something that's created. Even if it's not whatever it's there it's separated can live after your soul. >> The idea is created and it could leave live posthumously. It lives after you. Yeah. >> But not gone. Yeah. The person evaporates the rats. There's nothing there because what is ratson? THE PERSON WANTS THE SOUL WANTS. There's no soul. So what's left? Nothing. >> You could say it used to want. Fine. But there's no mitsas. There's no >> Yeah. There's no person. >> The soul. Yeah. The nephew >> the eye. The the the soul. Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> So I ratson is for something. You're right. But that mitsus doesn't remain a mitus in the without that roten. It's mitsus is I want it. The it is because I want it. And if you take away the I want that it doesn't have significance in that world of rotten. It it's it's only that I want it. >> Huh. >> Oh. So the Reb says that's the difference of Hashem and it's a whole different level of reality. >> Is already creation. >> Yeah. So it's like whatever exactly could be could be is a world that created it. It's words. It's it's all God. That's what we said before. It's it's the divine energy concretized in the world. But there's something called a world that is his. Ratson is all relational. It's all relationship. There's nothing outside of relationship. There's nothing tangible. It's it's a different way of experiencing reality. It's it's a deeper It's a deeper dimension. It's all a relation. It's all a relation. It's I want. Now I may want this person. I may want this thing. I may want this reality. But there's nothing in the reality outside of the rats. If the rats goes away, there's no mit because even when it's there, there's nothing outside of the >> So you're saying we exist because Hashem continuously wants >> wants us. So here, what is existence? He wants you. >> That's the difference between >> course infinite is forced to overflow into creation is there's no force. Hashem decided he had he had a he to create and we only exist because he continues to that's the didn't get to >> so the rosson was not there. >> Yeah that's what he finishes here. So he was stuck in a door. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. head. So because it's from so it's it's much less it's more absent then there's that comes from where you speak from it's like from so over there it's also all the like we said before there's no mitas outside of it but nonetheless it's the way Hashem becomes the mitsus of the world in ratson what's what's felt in mitsus is that there's nothing outside of their I want you. SO THE WHOLE YOU IS I want the relationship is a whole different level of the relationship. It's not even your concretize as a mits is but this the truth of the chemistry of your mits is that's the first level. That's also very very deep fusion. But he that's why he says certificate that if you go to a deeper layer in existence you'll see it's all ratson and because it's all rats there's nothing outside of the rat theas of the world is just a manifestation of rot and this is the difference between desire and any other kayak that's why desire is something that's sacred in a relationship I want is touching the eye right if if uh somebody very close to you says, "I want something." And you start explaining to them why they shouldn't want it, which a lot of people make that mistake. It's a mistake because the the truth of desire is it's not what they want. It's that I want it. >> It's it's eye. It's touching the eye. It's true. You see it also in in the in the absence of it. For example, a child who has a deep desires and they're not met. And it could be because of an explanation. It's not important. It's not significant. But the message the person got was that I don't matter. I don't exist. You understand? But what's the big deal? It was a small thing. In you could say this is significant. This is not significant. This is a stupid theory. In rats, it's not about what. It's not about what you want. It's who wants it. It's a very big difference. If we talk about what you want, this is big, this is small. And that's why when it comes to the smallest thing becomes as significant as the biggest thing and maybe more because it's what I want. It it it means to me it means to me now of course a person could be aware of diff sometimes a person is only aware of external parts of themselves and the I want you know is coming from a very superficial eye or coming from a very wounded eye. So that that's a very important disclaimer, but that's a very important disclaimer. You know what I mean? I may want to finish the whole cheesecake because my taste buds are hungry and I need to numb my pain and I'm starving and I'm in a bad mood. So >> because I'm so not in touch with >> uh because I'm not in touch with my eyes. So that's that that's a ruten that's actually alien. I don't know who I am. I just need to numb something. So this is like it's like a crush like it's it's a distraction >> like a trauma. My trauma wants it. Very good. My trauma wants it. But but but that we have to understand that doesn't take away from the nikuda of rats. Rats. But but there's there's something called I and that I is real. Yeah. If you remember we spoke about this I think it was class 4 um about ratsen over there. He speaks we often are taught that I want is a dirty word. Well, first of all, you don't exist. And even if you exist, you want you want like it's a double, right? Strike two, right? Strike three is when you tell me what you want. I is strike one, want is strike two, and then what you want, you know, for all three strikes, frank. But that's that's that's a a distortion of reality. It's a distortion of reality because sometimes that creates very very broken people. A wholesome person can actually say I want. Not because you're narcissistic. I want is not narcissism. The real I is divine. Hashem says I want. That's not narcissism. Hashem. It's actually when there's a real eye, it wants even more. Not it wants because it wants to manipulate. Because because this is who I am. means there's something called desire and desire is very very real. It's very very authentic. I would say a healthy person could say I want I was I was at a at a ray of hope Shabbaton. So it was a big therapist Dr. Tamar Pearlman. So she said a beautiful line. It was like wow. She was telling people who are survivors of sexual abuse ray of hope. So she said there was a panel. So she said uh when people are living in trauma all they could say is I need. How do you know that you began healing? When you could start saying I want. Not I need but I want. When I'm when I'm in trauma all there is I need. I need you to get away from me. I need you to give me space. I need to breathe. I need and even good needs. You know I I need I need things that will help me survive. At the moment I don't even have the luxury to be able to feel what I want. I want I need survival is a need. It's a need. The the person wants to survive. Even the neph wants to survive. It's a need. That's what I focus on needs. Needs want actually comes from. It's like you're actually you're in touch with yourself. You're not in survival. When when when somebody is in awitz, right? I remember Rabbi Lao was once talking about you. You don't say I want. The word I want was a stupid word. You understand, right? It's stupid. No, cuz cuz I want will distract you from survival. I need I need now water. I need now water. I need to find a worm that I can eat. I need to find a potato peel that I can All you focus on need. I need a little sleep. And and if and if you get your needs, maybe you'll survive to to the the brain will not go to I want because I want will, God forbid, take away your 24-hour obsession with I need. And many of us live in that zone. unconsciously because maybe physically we're not in danger but emotionally we're in danger. So there's no such a thing I want. Even if I say the words I want, it's really I need healing means no there's actually an eye and the eye can feel its heartbeat. You actually have a heartbeat. You actually have desires. We God has desires. You have desires because you're actually in fact you're one. You're actually one. Your deepest desire is but you have real desire. I really want I want this relationship. I don't need it. I'm not for I'm actually fine. I'm good. I want it. It's a very big difference. You understand? Also, the fact that you're actually fine when you're whole. So, you say, I actually don't need it. In other words, you may tell me no. I may ask you if you want to be connected to me and you may say and I'll be fine. I'll be fine because it's not a need. It's a want. I want it. I want you. I don't need you. I want you. And it makes the relationship much deeper. It's actually it's my soul in its deep core feeling that this is part of MY CALLING. I WANT IT. I don't need it. I don't need it. If God doesn't want me to have it, fine. Maybe there's something else. But I it's something I want. You understand the difference? So ratsen rotten is is is the eye that is it's the shape of the eye. What what what shape does the eye take on? It's worthiness. Yeah. Real worthiness. And that's a deep question. Do you are you worthy enough that you're allowed to have desires? A lot of people deep down do not feel they're allowed to have desires. They don't feel it. Men do you mask him with what I'm saying? >> How did I guess? >> Get married. >> Right. In a good marriage, a wife tells a husband, "I want this." And he starts arguing. Nah, you don't know what you are. You don't need that. You're missing the whole point. Respecting the eye is respecting the desire because the desire is just the eye. That's what it is. And that's why it's not neg one, small one. Desire means that I exist that it's re my my eye is real. >> I matter. >> I matter. Yeah. That's the here. And therefore there's no mitzen outside of I. The moment the is gone, the mits the mits is not significant. See, but it's a small thing. It's not small or big. It's not about what it's I. It's what I want. It means something to me. It means to me. So telling a child your desires can't be met. It's a delegitimization of the eye, not of the object. Se I can argue with you about the idea. I'm not arguing with you. I'm arguing with the idea. Rutson, right? If I say I'm not going to do your rotten, I'm not arguing with the idea. The mitsus of rats is the nephesh. So just like if there's no neffesh, there's no rats. If there's no rats, there's no mitas. The whole mitsus of something is the rats of it because it's the soul itself. It's not a outside of the soul. So what does this mean in creation? That there's different levels of creation. One level of creation is the hashem. The whole mits of the world is alus a deeper level is there's no mitsas outside of the that is its mitz what is the world a relationship it's what am I god wants me that's what I am and if you could feel that that's pretty uh by the is the beginning of a but it's between you and me it's a very deep moment in a in other what is your mitas he want I want he wants you now think there's there's a lot of there's a lot of ecstasy in that imagine you can experience what is the re what what am I What what are my cells made up of? What what are my cells? What is my brain? What are my neurons made up of? What are my genes made up of? And the answer is God wants me. His desire. You're feeling desire. You're feeling crazy ecstasy. That's what you are. That's what you are. You are the That's what you are. There's no mas outside of the That is the Okay, Basham will continue the shar tomorrow 8 o'clock a.m. Friday. Everybody have a beautiful day.