Mindflex- Passover, Relying on Miracles- Rabbi Yitzchok Feldheim

[Music] shalom alaikum everybody in the project inspire audience it's always inspiring to talk to people looking for inspiration so let's get uh started i i called the shirt and you shall remain silent relying on miracles and it's sort of an ironic title is that hashem wants us to remain silent but on the other hand really not supposed to rely on miracles so i just spoke about this for purim and i want to say what i said for purim and then tell you the new version of what i have to say for pesach the purim talk was that was also this but from the opposite angle meaning that in in the context of purim like the definitive moment maybe in the megillah is where mordechai tells us that you better you got to go to ah and the words he uses are him if you will remain silent at this moment then it's all for naught and and this is your moment this is what you were here for and this is your whole family and your whole history was leading up to this moment and you have to be up to the moment but over here we the torah uses exactly the same word and it says you shall remain silent and i guess for both the um told him you have to explain why their opposite approaches my purim talk was explaining why esther had to not be silent god forbid god forbid you should be sound if you will remain silent it'll be a tragedy and for pesach we have to defend why it is that we're required to be silent so the idea i said for purim was really i want to say it because it's a paradigm shift and i don't know how many people heard that speech but the hebrew word for silence really has a different meaning the word for silence in the torah is really plowing to be quresh the first malacha right of anchovies the third time allah is plowing this forbidden the word for plowing is called to plough what is the relationship between plowing and silence so this is how we color is so cool it's like listen to this there's two stages in growth there's the gloria stage which is growth you know seating and plan everybody wants to be a cedar or flowers or fields of waving grain you know and this is this is the image of of beauty is the planted field an orchard beautiful fruit the less glorious stage is plowing is taking your your metal your iron your steel blade with a pack of oxen and ruining the beautiful soil in the perfect field but we understand that plowing is integral and essential for anything that's going to grow the relationship of plowing to planting is exactly the relationship between action or speaking and silence silence is the stage of the plowing the reason you have to plow before your seed is you have to loosen up the soil and open up the soil so that the seeds can penetrate deep into the ground and take root and the minerals can be loosened up so that this the entire growth can take place and that's exactly what the role of silence is the wisdom the terror is sharing with us that that in the idea that plowing and silence is the same it wants you to understand silence not as the absence of speech silence isn't an act of meekness of passivity it is the brave act of allowing yourself to be opened up so that the growth and the powerful things can happen and uh that's how we have to see silence and and that essentially was the explanation of why in the initial stage of jewish history we had to have atam takarishin you had to be silent and because first you have to go through the plowing and it's only at the later stages when that's why it says it's a double expression if you will be silent silent meaning that plowing is beautiful and but but it's just a preparatory stage you can't plow forever enough with the plowing it's time to start to seed the first stage as we begin as a nation you have to begin with the silence to allow the experience to penetrate i remember going on vacations and going on trips and sitting there with a camera making sure i got every perfect shot and you really have no memories of the moment because you were so busy you know preserving it for the future that the present didn't take place it's it's it's a different experience to put down the camera and absorb everything that's happening and uh okay then you can preserve it but there's something at least that you wish you preserved to preserve something that just reminds you of empty moments is i guess the perfect world is both is the synthesis of uh you know you you have to you have to experience the moment and therefore be silent and allow the things to penetrate especially in the formative stages and it's after everything's taken root and the ground's been loosened up and the minerals are exposed and the seeds are are are have the perfect you know place to put them in that now you can begin to plan and that's how we have to see this stage in history that was my problem talk okay now let me give you the pixel talk the pace of talk is is i'm not i'm i have no problem with the purim talk it's just i think it's a much large not that this isn't large but there's a much larger message here you know there are certain huge we call them huge fields of study within judaism that need to be fleshed out and the place of miracles i think is is is is one of the most one of the least understood or at least clarity you know we it needs a lot of clarity needs some light shine on it and that's what i want to do what is the role of miracles so first let me let me start with what i assumed for years and i'm sure many of you assumed and then we'll we'll see if that's actually going to be the case the way i understood miracles is miracles is essentially a safety net that hashem controls the world and he can it'll catch you if you fall but you're not supposed to rely on miracles we grew up hearing that you shouldn't rely on miracles why shouldn't you rely on miracles because miracles are you know you want to cl you know i always use the masada metaphor for these kind of things you go to masada there's always the guy who takes the cable car you know but 90 of the group kids in the trip do the work and they climb the mountain it's harder you get sweaty it takes a long time and you get you get to the top you're you're worn you're tired but you're climbing masada and you're experiencing the top is vastly different because it because of the way you made your journey the guy who took the cable car he you know he's a fraud he doesn't feel the same way you can tell which is the guy who the cable car so life is supposed to be where we eat the fruits of our labor you know maybe i'll go off on a tangent because this is something a question i get a lot there's a very famous jewish concept that many people have heard um called the bread of shame nama the kisofa and that's we understand the reason why god gave us free choice and didn't make us all of god like the jewish ideas that god created the world only to give he's not here to torture us he only wants to give he's a loving god he wants to give so the question is why weren't we born then already in the world to come or ready with all the gifts if god wanted to give why couldn't he just give god can do what he wants he should have just given it to us and the answer is is that it's impossible to give the perfect gift because by definition the perfect gift is imperfect because the gift is lacking in pride in a gift you're a beggar in the gift you feel guilty and you feel ashamed and therefore the perfect gift is not a gift at all the perfect gift is the opportunity to earn it for yourself and god who wants to give give he wants to give in a godly way in the perfect way the perfect gift therefore is not a gift the perfect gift is earned and that's why we have free choice and a whole complicated world of good and evil is also that we can ultimately experience the top of the masada through our own journey and not take a cable car because it would be a very sad experience if the world to come we was achieved to a cable car we wouldn't want to spend eternity at the great feast feeling guilty and ashamed the whole time okay that's the famous idea and most thinkers of people who are on torreira time classes probably have heard this you know or in project inspire classes i've heard this already the next level question that thinkers ask on this is so why did god have to create the concept of shame of guilt why why couldn't he have made people without that monkey on their back and therefore they could have experienced he could have like he created god did everything so he created a problem that needed to be solved by all this complexity just create people without that problem create a world where you're oblivious to earning things so listen people think it's a great question i can't tell you how proud students are when they they come to me rather i have a good question it's a good question but it's not really a good question because the answer is so obvious when you think about it i i'm surprised people don't realize it right away why i need to say it is that it's not a game shame it's not it's not something that god arbitrarily created and why do you have to do that it's it's it's it's just a reality of logic it's a law of existence is that if you didn't create it yourself you don't really have it you're not really perfection requires self-sufficiency if you didn't earn it yourself then it's not really the full experience people misunderstand the bread of shame as some made up psychological you know quirk that god put into people no it's if if you want to be perfect you want to experience totality so you have to be the whole package if you need something else then you then that we call it shame so it sounds arbitrary it's not shame it's the lack of self-sufficiency it's a lack of perfection you're dependent on others so you can never if i'm dependent on someone else i can never feel the total feeling of total self-worth we together can experience self-worth as a community and that's how we live but but independently we need if i don't earn something and and you gave it to me it's not a quirk it's a fact that i don't really have it i didn't earn it that's this is this is a truth it's just reality so that's how how we understand the the real understanding of the bread of shame and therefore that doctrine you know is that you got to earn things and everyone understands this you don't you don't need classes to explain this why it's better to earn your money than to inherit money you know it's easier to inherit but why why why we you know men don't want to ask directions why why we sit for hours like doing riddles and you want somebody i'm doing a riddle and you want to give me a hint because you want to leave already i'm not taking hints don't tell me a riddle if you don't have all the time in the world because i'm old i don't think so fast anymore but i'm not going to let you help me so i'm going to be there all day figuring out like you know uh what the trick is and what the catch is and doing the math and because i gotta figure it out that's a reality of how we are so that's why intuitively miracles are not the ideal way to go a miracle is is is leaving us lacking so that's that that's the way maybe a fancier way of explaining it but that's the way i was raised and most of us think about it if i could sum it up my whole long speech in one sentence is that it's better to do things yourself don't rely on a miracle god already is god this is your chance to shine so shine don't don't ask for him to shut the shine on you but we need a safety net you know because we can fall and life is hard so there is a role i understand there's a role for miracles the role of miracles is is you know you go try and make some money and you you raise a family and if things go wrong we have social security we have unemployment we'll have you know government the stimulus you know you'll get your check or your deposit and uh but that's not you know ideally you shouldn't need that so that's miracles and that would be issue and we could we would stop there the reason why i i have another half an hour left to go is because here's where it gets complicated is that it doesn't seem like that in judaism you know if miracles were a safety net then when would we talk about miracles the metaphor i like to use is in the circus you know you have the guy who walks the tightrope so he he walks the tightrope his goal is not to fall off a tightrope even though we put a safety net there you know the goal is to do his flips and his old schtick and to ace the tightrope to do it perfectly the idea that that uh that it's a safety net is just a last wizard we don't want him to splatter if something goes wrong you know so if that's the case so if that's life god put you in the world let's do it let's do the job let's feel proud of ourselves let's eat the fruits of our labor let's stand the top of our mountain you know i i talk a lot to to in college because they'll have a lot of potents you know so it's so you know so this is how like they all it's all they want to talk about is like rabbi what's wrong with the what's wrong with doing doing doing marijuana you know it's illegal already so what i explained to them is this i explain to them you know like what's wrong with it is just just you come to a mountain you know you can climb the mountain and feel like a million dollars or you can take a nap at the bottom of the mountain you know if if you climb the mountain so it's hard work and you can break your neck and you can catch pneumonia but you get to the top you feel great the other i go with my buddy and he goes out there's a dangerous mountain my clients mountain but you see how much shade there is you could have a nap here like nobody ever had so one buddy takes a nap at the bottom of the mountain the other guy climbs the mountain so we both do the same thing you know the guy in the bottom is like this lying flat on the floor the guy climbs to the top a week later he gets there he lies on top of the mountain does exactly the same thing but nobody would say they're doing the same thing right the guy in the bottom is chilling he didn't do anything the guy in the top he's he's vibing you know he's sitting there like he's just he did it it's the same posture but don't mix it up you know the problem with shortcuts is is that you don't you didn't climb the mountain you just feel like you climbed the mountain but you didn't climb the mountain life is about the achievement so if that's the case so then when should we talk about miracles we the whole jewish calendar should be all about hard work we should have a holiday about waking up early and holiday about pulling up your bootstraps on a holiday about discipline and structure and responsibility and loyalty and ethics and diligence and vigilance a lot of holidays and then the last holiday and if all else fails the last holiday should be and now we have safenet holiday if this all fails don't worry god will catch you and he'll come in and wave the wand and or the moshe's staff and everything will you know you know moshe is like our fairy godfather you know that's what moshe is and he's the guy who's going to turn everything right all the pumpkins and the coaches and everything will be perfect in the end because we didn't do it ourselves the problem is that that's not the reality the reality is is the first mitzvah terror gives us this is the beginning of your calendar the first month is the month of nisan the month of miracles judaism begins with splitting seas and plagues weirder plagues one after another every plague miraculous the ocean has the waters have to split we walk through the middle this is this is far from a safety net the entire role of judaism over here seems to the role of miracles and judaism seems to be the first stage the most important stage then we have a seder we sit down with our kids and we do weird things just to make them ask about the miraculous and we talk about the miraculous we talk about god's plagues we count the plagues and we we count all the miracles and it's very hard to reconcile the judaism that we that we know of in the texts and in our experience with the judaism that logically we assume it is the assumption is earn it miracles will have a backup plan but the reality of judaism seems seems to be that we're missing the bone in miracles miracles have a whole different role i'll i'll just because the people who are in these kind of classes probably have a little more background and thought so i'll stick in something i normally wouldn't stick in because the haggadah starts off we refer to god by a very rare name of god that we don't normally refer to him as barak hamakum right connect the the four sons begins with the phrase of referring to hashem as the makkah it's a strange name of god and those who will know this will recognize that that name hamakum shows up most it's most known as the name of god you use in the house of mourning we say hamakom god will come for you and the the name for god we use there is means the place so how do we explain the idea of hamakom what what what is the connotation of hamakum so this is a cool thing and really i don't know why i went here because i should spend the whole class explaining just this point i'll say it fast is we do the kedusha in shmo nester we have right uh in the second blessing when the khasen repeats it we do something called the blessing of holiness and kedusha's a few stands there's a few freight lines that we say responsibly the first one is called kavodo maliolum that god's right god's honor his splendor his honor his perspective fills the entire world that's the phrase we say kadosh khan right everyone puts their feet together and you raise yourself up hashems splendor his honor fills the entire world the next paragraph says from his place he will turn to us with mercy now when we when you get into prayers everyone just gets all flowery and we unfortunately we don't think of it as something precise that needs to be analyzed but that's exactly what it is and when you analyze it you realize this is weird because it's it's it's really the two lines are in a total conflict with each other is his kavodo his honor malay kala islam is he filling the entire world right does god is god everywhere or is it minkoyma his place he can't be everywhere and have a place which one is it so this is the idea of the two phrases first we say kavoda malayolam that god exists everywhere that everything is godly and you just have to invest yourself in life and the way we experience god is in my house in shul in my office there's a godly life and the godly marriage and the godly parenting and is this being a godly student and a godly teacher and a godly boss and a godly employee there's a way to live life and what we do is in that course of our lives if every one of us lives a holy spiritual life then our life is holy and that's that's what we mean when we say cuddles cut is the sound of every individual embodying his holiness living life a certain way and that kind of holiness fills the entire world it is the symphony of existence where every element of the world is proclaiming god through his everyday life and that's kadosh that's the kedusha of god that fills the world but then let's say it doesn't work let's say you're not successful in any field in any field in all fields then you can appeal to a different version of god yes god revealed himself in the world and all you need to do is live an ethical moral life and you'll have blessing but sometimes we're too depressed and we can't do that i don't have i know if i went to work i make a living i know if i study with my kids i'll have nakas i know if i i do what it takes everything will work out but that ship sailed and i'm too broken and i can turn to hashem and say hashem i the i can't experience the you that's in the world i need the you above the world and kaimuri the god who's above it all beyond it all you turn to me with mercy barakamim kavodo is mali olam is justice i earn it minkomov misplaced god turns in mercy mercy is the miraculous side of god that's beyond this world it's his place this two versions of god is the god that embodies all of existence this is when you say kadusa is what you're supposed to think you're supposed to think first kavod mali ola mashem fills the world and then we say but if that if that fails then hashem you will turn to turn to me with mercy miracles and mercy to me are synonymous and justice and and reality and nature are synonymous in fact the word elohim which is the name of justice has the same numerical value as nature nature and and the god who fills the world are the same and miracles and mercy the god of above i didn't earn he's going to carry me that's that that's also the same so in in kedusha the script is exactly like we would expect first we talk to the god of justice and only then when that doesn't work then we say to the god of mercy in comma and this is what we do in the god this is what we do in the house of mourning when when life didn't go the way we want when someone's died and we feel the loss then we don't talk about that god has as he's revealed in the world we say god beyond the physical world the god who who when life is is is not wrecking with the perfect perfection of life and the justice is not cognizant it's not recognizable then we turn to hashem we say the makkah will will come for you hashem's merciful god who's beyond you you're not going to understand this and that's the same god that we talk about ironically i'm not going to go with go there but that's the god that we relate to in the haggadah the haggadah is the god of mekomo the god beyond this world and that's the same god who wants me to be silent and don't do anything you should be silent not the plowing idea but the idea is is that for some reason even though in the normative way of thinking of it we say kavodo mali olam before makomo first we try and do it ourselves and then we appeal to the god the holiday of pesach is different the halal pesach is introduced by the god who is makomo the god beyond the world the god of mercy and of magic and by the cleaning of the sea hashem says you be silent and by all the plagues everything is the hand of hashem not of our hands there's no role for us we leave we going to desert all the food is magical everything's magic everything's there's nothing earned so now i have to explain why that's the case we explained what it is and we explain how it's really the opposite of the way we normally understand judaism and uh why are miracles all of a sudden front and center when it comes to pesach and if pesach was the last month of the year it would make sense why miracles are front and center but pesach is the first thing it's our first holiday this is the first month why are we beginning with the safety net why don't we begin with the tightrope what's the glory of jumping in a safety net at the beginning of the production it's only supposed to catch you on your phone so here's where we understand this is i think the entirety of what pesach is and everything i said now i said it with such confidence and like i had no right to say that i was it was misleading because miracles have nothing to do with catching you when you fall that's not the reason for miracles if there was to catch you when you fall then it would be exactly like we said it would be an afterthought in judaism and everything we'd ever read about would be about doing it yourself and we wouldn't be having holidays with plagues and splitting seas and every mitzvah wouldn't be and remember the leaving of egypt the leaving of egypt should be a source of shame that god had to carry us we're a proud people how come everything is that god carried us god took us out of egypt and we were just props little marionettes right so what are we missing what are we missing is is it it's it's it's probably maybe the most important thing that people need to know is let's talk about why people people don't succeed in life why do we need a safety net why are safety nets necessary why don't people succeed at their tight ropes between me and you it's a good question everyone if you're not drunk you can walk a straight line right there's nobody in the world not nobody but very few people who are sober and healthy and stable who can't put one foot in front of another so if you can do it here how come you can't do it up there what what difference is it if you're 500 feet in the air or you're on the ground it's a straight line right we're not falling over walking on the ground we're not losing our balance walking straight so why should you lose it up there i'm really that that's a metaphorical question but really we're asking the question on life itself why do people fail why like what real our jobs are like what's my job my our jobs aren't insurmountable they're not they're not jobs that we can do we're quite capable of doing our hashem gives you jobs that you can do so why are we failing at jobs that we're capable of and that's a very big question right what's the answer the reason why people fail is not because we don't have the ability to do it every single thing that i'm giving i can deal with if i wasn't able to deal with hashem wouldn't send it to me he's not cruel he's only there for our for our good so there's two reasons why people don't succeed at life they're really the same reason but there's two ways it plays out one reason is we're too scared to fall so we never try we get paralyzed in that little box at the side of the tightrope and we're afraid to put our foot down and we do it in shidduchim in dating i'm afraid to go on a date i'm afraid to go on a job and if you're afraid to apply to the school i want i'm afraid to go over to someone when i'm a kid and say be my friend i'm afraid to ask to be chosen for the play or to do the solo or to sing we spend so much of our lives on the sidelines in the wings because we're too scared to put our feet down even though we could do it it's the fear of stepping on to the tairoa that's the first reason we fail and then we fail because even when we're brave enough to step on the tightrope and we force ourselves onto the stage but we don't sing the way we could have sang because we're scared and we don't walk the way we could have walked because we're scared we fall because we're shaking we sing our voices crack because we're tentative i don't make the money because when i go do sales i knock meekly i answer the phone i answer the phone and i talk on the phone i don't do it with the confidence and the the power it's necessary there's two reasons we fail one is that we don't try we don't take the first step and one is that when we talk we try we do it tentatively and reluctantly and we're bound for failure if a person would bring his whole character and personality to beer he would succeed at all the things that were offered to him if you knock on the door with power and you talk and your eyes are lit up and people feel your fire they want to do business with you the lit up person the person who's confident and proud and you know he's in a good place you wake up in the morning and you go to chakras and then you learn after chakras and then you go to work they don't stand a chance they're going to buy whatever you're selling and everyone's going to want to hire you they're going to want to date you they're going to want to study under you they're going to want to hire you as a student they're going to want to sell what sell you what you need and buy what you're selling because when you feel good and you live life without reluctance you lose your tentativeness you'll hit it out of the park so the reason we fail in life is because of the fear that we're going to fail either and therefore either we we don't try or we try and we fall so you know what the secret of the tightrope is the secret of the safety net is the secret of a safe man is not to catch you when you fall it's that when you know that there's a safety net you're never going to fall the safety net is the first thing not the last thing if it was they catch you when you fall then the safety net would be the last month of the year but our first month of a year is nissan we begin with the seder your kids first memories need to be the pesos they need to take a nap so they can stay up and they'll ask their questions because you have one job at the seder as a parent and that is to convince your kids that hashem will catch them when they fall and if your kids know it there's a safety net no matter what they do hashem will catch them they will live life they'll be doing flips and jumps on that rope because nothing can go wrong what's the worst thing they're going to fall into this fun soft bouncy net the purpose of miracles is not to catch us when we fall on the bailis out the purpose of miracles is that we know that hashem will will save us and hashem will make it work and if you know that then you'll never need a miracle because you'll do it all yourself of course the goal is to do it yourself and decline the mountain to take no cable cars but if you know there's a cable car and you know that you get tired they're going to take you you're not going to miss anything you know that you're going to make it then you live life freely with fire and no reluctance because the stakes aren't that high and that's why judaism begins with miracles they're not it's not a safety net and this is the secret of why this why islam says the first things you have to know is watch me if today you're silent and you watch me and you see that i can do anything then the rest of life i can tell you in this don't be silent you're safe you can be all in and that's what we learned and that's why to say there is this the night of the say there is a night where there's no messengers we're not doing yourself hashem goes out he himself he smites the firstborn he splits the seas hashem does it all because if you know that he does it then you'll live a different life and that's our job as parents we go into the seder we don't know what our job is this is your job your job is that your kids should see in your eyes and hear in your stories the unlimited nature of hashem because we all want the same thing we want our children to giggle and bounce their way through life we we don't want to ever see them scared and reluctant and foregoing their dreams and what they wanted and watching life pass them by but everyone's reluctant because we believe we're going to splatter on the floor so the first thing you have to teach your kids is that hashem is going to save them hashem does miracles and then they'll never need a miracle as long as they live that's the goal of the satyr it's one night it's a night of miracles and then from then on once you learn this then never be silent again then go with the ghost you'll sing every solo this is the lesson of pesach and this is especially listen raising kids i think that's why we say parham can be raising kids you know i remember when i had my first kid we got every single book on parenting and then you realize that they don't agree on anything then you realize that you know what the torah speaks to all four sons that hashem is going to make it work if i didn't believe in hashem i don't know how i would have killed howard to raise kids every single step is terrifying everything's scary how do you do a shidduch gonna marry somebody forever how do you go on a date how do you choose a yeshiva how do you choose a community this so everything has flip sides and downsides this is why in judaism we focus so much on the miracles we're hard-working people we don't like shortcuts we're not socialists we're not looking for for free rights the purpose of miracles is to make you feel so safe that now you can have as many kids as you can have and and never look back and hashem's gonna make it work and now i can love my kids fully enough to protect myself and and not care and not have them i can throw myself into work and everything this is the secret of why we say in small nesters those who say no the swanes we say when i cry out to the name of hashem it gives strength to eloquem why does it change from name hashem to look him because this is exactly what we're saying here in the synopsis that i can cry out to the name of hashem which is a name of mercy that will give me the strength to face eloquent shame hashem it gives me all the ability to face elohim the god of reality my goal is to live in reality but it's the knowledge of hashem that allows me and this is the highlight of yom kippur the final punch line of wolverine kippur we say hashem hashem like him seven times what are we saying of the goal is to face it like him but allah kim is so daunting ella kim is terrifying i can fall hashem is like him that hashem fills the world but beyond all that is he's really there i'm repeating i wish i could repeat it 10 15 more times because everything depends on this bottom line is is everybody dreams everybody wants the same stuff but then we spend lives frustrated we we learn young to say whatever words like whatever sad words that that describe a sadness and a frustration and we give up because the world is scary you know justice is beautiful it's beautiful to know it is justice and that hashem gives you whatever you deserve but as beautiful as it is it's terrifying this is the secret of what it says that hashem created the world with justice and he saw the aina muskayam it's not going to work why won't it work we all love justice right we don't we hate injustice we definitely hate injustice but we love justice the idea that hashem is going to give me exactly what i deserve there's no cheating you know it has the good side that nothing every kindness i did will be paid but also every bad thing i do will be paid and as sad as that is it's sort of you know it's nice to know that to live in a world that's fair but the flip side of justice is terrifying and if i don't work hard and i'm depressed or i'm broken i'm going to starve if i if i check out for a week my kids might hate school and everything will change anything could go wrong if every single thing is a result of what i do you understand how scary justice we can talk all day long about the beauty of justice of experiencing the sodogas declined to yourself but you have to understand the terror that comes with justice and this is what ghazal described in their wisdom is that hashem created the world with justice because he wanted us to experience masada like kings but russia ain't a misguided he saw that it wasn't going to work because it's too terrifying and no one's going to do it everyone will just be in in the wings of the stages would have could have shut us and um and you know i just thought of something i i never thought as i'm saying this is that's the image of the slave who's afraid to go free he stands in the doorway and the thing i'm thinking about now is the whole point here was the silence we nailed his ear to the wall because he was supposed to dream but you didn't do the haresh you didn't do that the reason why he's the reason why we're scared why is the slave nobody dreamt of being a slave everybody wants to conquer the world for themselves so when the slave is able to go free he paid off his debt he stole and therefore he had to work for the master till he could pay off his debt and it's paid off and now we should go free why would he say i want to stay right he's entitled to say he wants to stay it's his choice but if he wants to stay you have to pierce his ear in the door frame you know why because the door frame is where you look out to the whole world the dream of the slave is by the doorway looking at that tomorrow and all of a sudden open the door and he's stuck he can't cross the threshold and that's that's our lives we're all nailed to the threshold but why is it the ear that's nailed that's what i'm just thinking of now that i just had this thought it's because the reason why we get paralyzed by the fear is because we didn't listen first hashem and know that he does miracles the atem you should be silent just open your ears and listen to hashem once you've gotten your dose of watching hashem do anything you'll never be afraid to cross the threshold again so if you're afraid to cross the threshold let me nail your ear to the doorway so you'll just sit there listening for a while and when it finally penetrates that look listen to all the sound of hashem in the world then next time we ask you maybe you'll run across the threshold like you should have in the first place so this is our world justice is scary beautiful magnificently beautiful but dauntingly scary and this is why this is what i'll say russia ain't in the sky and we saw that it wouldn't work and therefore what did he do he partnered with justice kindness mercy mercy god added the miracles back to the world mercy the miracle is the part of life that you didn't earn where god just steps in and does it all himself and god only did it because the justice is not going to work on its own hashem added to kindness and that's we want you to face i like him to see to face the justice in the world and to build yourself a magnificent world where you can sit one day at the top of your mountain and knowing that you climbed everything yourself but you're only gonna get there when you're fearless and you're only gonna be fearless when you know that hashem can catch you on your phone and that's what you have to teach your kids and that's your job i'm going to say that one night i mean it's not one night but this is the night if you don't do it this night you know it's like everything you don't do it the right way it'll take you forever to do it the wrong way try and do it the right way sit there by the seder and you know we have so we as parents we have so many thoughts of what we're supposed to be accomplishing and and then we end up guilty after because did i listen to enough of their things did we did we did we spend enough time on this the kids were so tired in the end they missed the songs it's good to know what your goal is your goal is that your kids should bounce out of the seder feeling like nothing could ever go wrong because hashem is going to save them that's the jews felt like you should be silent watch what hashem can do and then dance for the rest of your lives on this stage of your life wish you a beautiful say eternal nachas from your children and everyone that you touch good job