PIC2024 Keynote Dovy Weiser - Top's Liquor Store - See Something; Do Something

ladies and gentlemen another thing we learned over this weekend and we know to be true in our lives is that sometimes we have this expectation that when we encounter a less Affiliated Jew we have this expectation that after the encounter with us us amazing fir people that somehow the person's going to then take off their t-shirt and put on a Becka and somehow automatically become from bentura overnight but life doesn't work that way in our own backyard we have recent story that taught us just this very lesson ladies and gentlemen it's my honor to introduce to you doy [Applause] Weiser good everybody um so I just heard the tail end of the uh fill sagas and actually my story uh for right now opens with a little bit of filling story as well two years ago we were on a trip on a tour and one evening we were having a kumzits and there was a non-jewish uh tour group that was near us and after a little while we saw an older gentleman um without yam clearly not a fju at least walk over and sit with us and a couple people started to talk to him and I joined the conversation and after a few minutes um he shared that he grew up in Brooklyn New York went to ISA Brooklyn now he lives in California and he had him put on film since 1960 something recall but it was clear he heard the Jewish music and it called him and so he came to sit with us and I started talking to him and I don't know why I just said to him well and I don't remember his name honestly um I said we have shockist tomorrow morning at 8:30 why don't you come join us and you can put on filling he says no I can't I said it's no big deal you guys are right next door anyhow come he says you don't understand I can't and he went on to proceed and explain to me his mother had passed away from a terrible sickness his sister and he had issues with that he couldn't reconcile but I don't want you to think I've forgotten everything he said because um I still give tedua I still give charity and I even send the check every year to my alma to yiva Brooklyn said okay and it just stoned to me that clearly Sedaka is important to him and a little spark had been turned on by the music air tonight so I said to him you know if you come put on film tomorrow morning I'll make a donation to your favorite charity he said no we spoke a little further and let's just say that by the end of our conversation there was a there was a promise of substantial donation for myself and somebody else to his favorite charity if he would join us to put on fill in the morning and he took leave and I left went back to my room and I called my friend MO gray who's in Dartmouth College I said Mo how do you guys do this I see all the pictures you make it look so easy and he said to me what happened I told him he says don't worry he said if a yid wants to do a Mitzvah to be with the Mitzvah be and I got to tell you I went to sleep I was pumped I was sure that guy's going to be in in the morning I was early to daving um let's just say that he didn't show and to say I was deflated would be an understatement however for the past seven weeks my thoughts about this story have totally changed and I'm filled with hope that this Jew will find his way to putting onil and maybe even to the group who knows and um the seed that I planted two summers ago will perhaps take root and grow you see approximately 30 years ago I went to buy a bottle of wine for shabas and I walked into Tops Liquor an Avenue between East 28th Street East 29th Street and um the um I bought a bottle of wine I think it was a little more than 30 years ago and they carded me and um it was a little more than 30 years ago and um I didn't have proper ID and they said you can't buy it I said it's for shabas didn't care what it was for you need ID so I went out to the car my father was in the car he came in and of course we struck up a a small conversation and then from then on every time I walked into the store you know we were friends and my friendship with the con family with hoe whose Uncle started the store in the 1940s his wife um passed away during covid his son Jeff who's become a good friend of mine and his wife Mary um they become my friends and I sent them tons of customers over the years um he taught me a lot about wine I taught him about whiskey nobody knew much about bourbon then so it was just scotch and um they' been to our home for shabas and for shabas meals and um one time I invited him for suus for lunch I was thinking I have a little vaness rig how can I get them to bench vaness I don't want to be so obvious they may look at it as weird what is this thing so I decided I'm going to leave the VRI on the table and the Suka and they'll come in I say I just got back from sh oh this is little VRI and if they engage we'll do something about it and K they come in we make Kish and the Suka and he I pick up the to walk out and he says what is that and I tell him what do you do with it and I explained that we shake it and his wife says can I do it too I said for sure I said I give her the little vaness rig and I make a br she repeats after me then he does it and she says to me what is the sign significance of this log so I said it's a very very good question let's start the meal and we'll talk about it I'm thinking to myself how am I going to explain to a non-firm person who knows they're wonderful people they're super Jews but they don't know much about anything when it comes to practicing yish how am I going to explain kav what it resembles so we go in we wash we sit down at the table and as soon as we sit down I he says so what's with the LA that trog I said we're going to get there and three four times throughout the meal she keeps on pushing saying no and before I can even say anything she turns to my son Yehuda who was 8 n years old at the time and she says Yehuda do you know the significance of the little vaness Rog he says of course my Reby told me and in 30 seconds he spits out an answer and she goes oh I get that that's great you sometimes you bring a person to your table and you're so like you have trepidation about it I have to make the right impression I have to say all the right things your right notes and then sometimes you see that you don't have to have a the answer just comes out naturally well excuse me approximately 15 years ago I was in my office it was the end of the day and my phone rings and it's Jeff how are you good say I need to talk to you I said okay he goes no no no I really need to talk to you I said like in person he says yes I said do you need me to come to the store he says if you wouldn't mind I said okay so it was towards the end of the day I got in my car and I drive into Brooklyn and I get to the store about 7 7:00 at night and I come in and he calls me into the office in the back he's sitting there with his wife with his mother with his father and the ear in the room was very very heavy and he goes and he pulls out a piece of paper and the paper shows how basically somebody had said not to shop in his store because he wasn't shabas and the store was open on shabas um recently there had been other stores that opened in the neighborhood um from own liquor stores today we have a dime a dozen but back then 15 years ago there weren't so many and you know 20 30 years ago there certainly weren't and he looks at me he goes how can they do this to me I was quiet he says my uncle my dad I we've been here for the community when you needed to buy wine for chabas this was the only store orlanders wasn't Jewish store yet Midwood on conal Avenue wasn't here we were the only ones how could they say not to shop by me I was quiet and put in my head and I said Jeff I said you know imagine your suit is dirty and you drive up to the cleaners and there are two cleaners on the same block and one of them has a pink ribbon in the window that money from the business goes to support cancer research and one doesn't and somebody in your family unfortunately has suffered through this and so cancer is a cause that's near and dear to your heart given the Choice you're going to walk in and support the store he says of course of course the store I said yes I said well Jee you need to understand shabas is our cause it's the cause of the Jewish people nobody is not choosing you we're just choosing to support our cause he was quiet he looks at me and he says so what do I do I said I can't tell you what to do but if you want to close in chabas he says how does one do that and I said well really you just pulled the gate down and he looked at me he goes well I don't know if I'm ready but and we started to talk a little bit I said to him well let me ask you a question I said you know what would be if your daughter Emma I think she was eight or nine years old at the time came home with a non-jewish boy and before I could even finish the sentence him his mother all them God forbid I said well let me ask you a question why shouldn't she I mean what does Judaism mean to you what does it mean to her what does she see that she should want to marry a Jew or at least stay away from marrying a non-jew and we had a very long conversation I spent a little over five hours there that night the next day was a of chabas um being makat are here and I bought them shabas candles and that was it and I go in there regularly I've sent them over the years hundreds of customers tell everybody go in say hello tell them you're my friend talk to him he's a Jew reach out to him love him and that's it well s weeks ago I was in erell it was Friday afternoon about an hour or so to shabas and my phone rings Jeff con I didn't answer it and then I get a WhatsApp says hey buddy call me when you can all is good so you know WhatsApp you push the button and you just connected back so that's what I did I pick up the he says hello how are you I said great I said I'm in Israel he go you're in Jerusalem I said yes that's fantastic I said what's going on he says remember that conversation we had this conversation was 15 years ago I said said yes goes I think it's time I said okay I said this week he goes no no no I'm not ready yet I said what do you mean goes I need to go talk to my accountant to my lawyer we have to talk it through I said Jeff stop says what I said it's clear for me and there was such his voice was shaking I said it's clear to me you're doing this from the right reasons and you're coming from the right place meet with whoever you need to meet with but when you meet with them let them know this is what you're doing and he says okay and I said to him well if it's not for this week he say well I need to know what to do and I said I'll be back in New York on Tuesday we'll sit down and we'll work it all out and I hung up the phone he wished me a good travas I wished him a good tras I called a friend of mine in New York and I said listen do me a favor this conversation just happened please go over to the store give him a hug give him a little kiz and that's what he did well that was seven weeks ago and and um the uh following chabas back in New York was my son rafal's Bar Mitzvah um and that was the first chabas in 83 years that the store that been a staple on AV a you was open on chabas was closed on sh excuse me it's been a long journey with my family in 1941 my great uncle open up the liquor store on Bedford Avenue and Avenue U and Flash Forward 83 years later my family is still here I've always been proud of who I am uh I've never pretested to be something I'm not but growing up in the store I always imagined uh how my life would end up and after what's going on in this world and thinking about everything my wife and I and my father and children really want to have a better quality of life so I picked up the phone and called one of my good customers and said I think the time is right for what I want to do and he goes you're talking about closing on choas aren't you and I said yeah I said I think it's the right move uh I just don't know exactly what to do and he said just do it so we closed the store 5 weeks ago at 4:15 on Friday closed on Saturday and started what I believe is the best chapter of my life which is the to celebrate shiat it's been an unbelievable experience for the last 5 weeks um I get to be with my family my shoulders feel like they're below my knees no pressure I get to hang out with my daughter and just have an amazing time what I did not expect was or wasn't ready for the what the community was going to do next which was my phone didn't stop bringing people didn't stop coming in my store um the gifts the the hugs the kisses the thumbs up people telling me that they're proud of me and what I did and um the best way to sum it up is if I needed to have a football team I'd have 2 million Jews on my team in two seconds so although being a dad is the greatest thing I've ever done and meeting my wife this is way up there because what it's brought us has been the most unbelievable path that we've had for the last 5 or 6 weeks just the way my store is Flowing the way the customers are coming in and talking to us and treating us they'll ask me a question and as they'll walk out they'll turn around and go you did a great job we're so proud of you I've witnessed customers laughing crying I'm like why are you crying they're like cuz we're so so happy for you so although I'm proud of who I am never before have I ever been so proud to be a Jew like I am now so I'm excited for this new Journey I'm excited to see where it takes us um but I just want want to thank everyone for making us feel like we did the greatest thing ever so we love you um anytime people have questions or anything come talk to me but um I'm just a static really for a guy with a big mouth I think I have no more words left to [Applause] say you know Jeff said it better than I can but I just want to conclude by saying first of all for those in the room if anybody has gone into the store to support him thank you if you Haven yet we all have friends in the business but let's show the love and make it go around I never would have thought that I'd be watching this video or standing up here telling the story at the time it was just something that happened and this was just somebody that I was friends with who happened to be a Jew um but you got to plant seeds you got to reach out you never know sometimes they grow quickly sometimes takes a long time but we see that they grow I get the thank you for listening back