PIC 2024 Rav Gav-Hashem Doesn’t Crash Buses, But You Might Miss a Flight!

Okay, I'd like I'd like to share with you guys the my favorite story, one of my favorite stories. That uh I think it was after chazaras hashatz, I'm hoping. And in the back of the shul I was davening, there were a whole bunch of seforim there. It's possible it was during tachnun. And uh this one particular sefer holy moly. That's That's intense. Now I Now I feel chashuv. Chashuv that I show you all the cards. Yeah. Yeah. Uh what drink would you like? Uh if I can get a Diet Dr. Pepper. I'm kidding. I'm totally kidding about that. I'm totally kidding. A little bit I'm a little bit A little bit I'm kidding. I'm saying I'm saying maybe I'm not kidding. All right. So, this is uh this is one of my favorite stories. I read in a sefer by a rav by the name of Lowenstein, I believe it is. Yes. I got it right? And uh what's the sefer called? Maor Maor The men will know it. Gentlemen? Maor Sure. Anyway, so he says the following story. The story is about a boy on a bus in Eretz Yisrael. You know the story? Oh. So, this boy is in He's in Eretz Yisrael and in Eretz Yisrael the way that it works is sometimes parents will let their kids who are a little bit young take the bus. Oh, yeah. Take the bus. Yeah. Well, they chazak ubaruch. It's not Diet Dr. Pepper. What is this? It's Diet Coke. What is this? I just have to imagine like it's Diet Dr. Pepper? So, they will they will uh take the let you know these little kids that are like 6 7 years old, take the bus and usually those 6 or 7 year olds bring with them their own children that are like you know, one or two. And and they get on. So the story is told that a 5-year-old kid or so uh just before the chosson and the kid gets on the bus. And when the kid gets on the bus, uh says to the bus driver you know, as they're going and the bus driver very gentle, relaxed, calm Israeli loving, giving, caring, thoughtful, gentle. Uh if anyone's been to Israel, you know exactly what I mean. And uh you know, it's like when the door you get on, the doors close and they take off, you know, that type of thing. And uh 5-year-old goes flying all the way back. And then he walks up to the front and the 5-year-old says to the bus driver standing there and the bus driver notices that the that the guy is there. So he says to him very gently, said, "Ma like what do you want?" So the kid says Kvod Hanahag honorable driver Ishti Said, "No, Ma." He said Im Efshar Bakasha Im Efshar Lasot To Nat D'rachim Can you please crash the bus? So that the driver was like "What?" And everyone on the bus was like, "Ma?" Like what are you talking about? So the driver was like, "No, like that happened, I'm not crashing the bus." So the So the kid says Bakasha please just could you please Im Efshar Lasot To D'rachim, can you please just crash the bus? He's like, "I'm not No, I'm not doing it. Not a chance." So, the kid's like, "You know, I never asked anything of you. You know, this is the only thing I ever asked. Can you please crash the bus?" And he said, "You know what?" Now, the whole bus goes, "What?" So, he goes, "You know what?" "Why?" "Why do you want me to crash the bus?" And he's like, "Just please do it." He's like, "What's going on?" And the kid starts crying. He's crying. Tears are are are falling down his face and and he's very emotional. It's it's a serious He's not just playing games. He's really feeling it. And now, he knows there's this little puddle, you know, from his tears. So, he jumps in the puddle. That's what kids do. And then, he comes and he's like, So, what did he say back? What's his reply response to "Why?" What's the "Why?" And finally, he says, "Why? Why?" "What do you want me to crash the bus for?" So, he said, "Listen, I always hear my parents talking about over there and they talk about this thing called "Why?" Literal means a accident on the road. So, he said, "I always hear this, but I don't know what it is. I want to see what it is. So, can you please show me what it is?" And he said, "Oh, well, in that case," he was like, "No." And goes on to explain, how many of us have cried for something before? Anyone here ever davened for yes or no? And you really wanted it? You felt it was like one of them is this a good thing, you know what I mean? Like what you really want this. Now I want to tell you the crazy thing is that there are always people in the room that have in their head when I say something like this they go and they go Okay, like cute story, you know. But you don't even know what I was really asking. You If you knew what I was asking for you wouldn't say this. Okay, so I just relax. And take a step back. I'm I wouldn't say that to you if that's how you come at me because then you're incredibly emotional. And if you're It makes sense that people can be incredibly emotional on many things in life. I have nothing to say to someone who's incredibly emotional. That's that we know the Torah teaches us that. That you don't say anything to people in in what are known as what the heck. You don't speak to people in what the heck. Now for those of you who brought children and you're a little bothered that's your emotional issue. Heck is an acronym, HEC. Which stands for highly emotional circumstances. Whatever you were thinking you needed a chuva. But you don't speak to people in a what the heck in a what the highly emotional circumstance. This the Mishna teaches us. The Mishna tells us that when a person's dead is lying before them somebody just lost a loved one do not comfort a person. Do not try to comfort a person when their dead is lying before them. That's strange. You think like you sit shiva. What do you mean you don't try to comfort someone? Do not try to comfort someone when their dead is lying before them. Someone just passed away. You don't comfort someone. I'll explain in a moment. That's an obvious one for me at least maybe for many of you. Number two. You don't try to calm down someone who's angry. Right? Don't try to calm someone It's like the greatest thing. What do you say when someone's angry? They're really upset. You say to them, "Calm down." And they go, "You know what? I never thought about it like that. Thank you so much for your help." Someone just lost their loved one. You're like, "Oh, I'm so I'm here for you." Like it's for the past. You know, that's like the best thing. It's great. Sham. No, you don't say anything. A person's making a neder. Someone in the middle of making a neder, a vow, don't talk to them. Don't ask them what they mean. Don't ask them what they mean. That one needs a little more clarification. People don't necessarily understand that one. But we know there's a homosecta called Seder Nedarim. That goes through with a person makes a vow, whatever someone makes a vow, can they get out of that vow? If someone makes a vow, can they get out of it? Yes or no? The answer is it depends. There are details to this. Something known as a torah sedarim, something known as haforas nedarim, and something known as you can't be mater of a mafair. Stuck. You're stuck forever. What is that? When someone goes and makes a neder, in order to get out of that, you either have to nullify it, you or you have to be mater, means you have to unlock it. So you go to a base din or you go to a chacham who really knows what he's a baki, and you have to find a way to get out of the neder. But it's got to be that you left a keyhole to unlock it. But if you locked it up completely, then you can't get out of it. What's example? This Shabbos, I didn't overhear anyone say this, but mistama somebody said it. Someone's eating again by cake, and they eat the machanahaam yoldaulton, and they're going at it, and then they walk out and they see themselves in the mirror, they get a little frightened, and then they go "Ah!" I am so fat. I am never Okay, I'm going to speak about someone else. They say they are never eating cake again the rest of their life believe me not the whole show. Okay, but let's say they say you As if you've never heard someone say something like that. Yes or no? They say, "I will never eat cake again." Again. Believe me not the But they don't say believe me not the So they say, "I'm never The next day The next day tomorrow one of you by breakfast. You go and you notice There's some There's some uh you know, cake's calling your name. You say no, it says yes. You say, "I'm willing to look at you, but I'm not talking with you." It says, "Come on, a couple words. Come on over here." And then you want that cake and you go, "Oh, no. I made a net there yesterday. Said I'm never having cake again." Believe me not the Who would have said it but who would have said that? So now what happens? What do you do? So you go to the rabbi. And the rabbi says to you "When you said you're never going to have cake did you mean chocolate or vanilla?" Right? So the next day It's the next day. "Did you mean chocolate or vanilla?" What's the answer? What's the answer? The answer is you didn't mean it at all. All you meant was, "I feel fat." So you said a line. You didn't actually mean that. But what happens if at the time you're saying it, you're eating it today? You're going at it. You're like, "Oh, SO SO FAT." AND THEN THE PERSON SAYS TO YOU, "What do you mean chocolate or vanilla?" What are you going to say? Chocolate and vanilla. Strawberry Strawberry cream cream chocolate nugget, I don't care. All of it. For how long? Forever. So the next day you go to the rov, you go to the base and say what So what do you and they say what? Say what did you mean? And then you say I mean what I I I mean I said like what I Now you're stuck. They actually stuck. There's a problem. This is why the mission says don't ask a person what they mean when they're making a nether. Don't ask them. It's a heck. It's a highly emotional circumstance. It's a heck. And you don't talk with people when they're going through heck. What do you do? You just be there. Classic, we all know. What do you say to a Shiva house? Stop, good, don't say anything. Good, nothing. You don't say anything. It's only afterwards. You wish if you're from South Africa, they wish you long life. You know, there's nothing you say. But you don't say anything until until person is leaving or until they talk to you. It it is the craziest concept. Somebody said to me yesterday, who said this? I know who said it to me. I know who said it to me. Someone said to me what They said one, I'm going to say two, but two is going to be confusing so I'll say one and we'll come to the second. What day of the year is the most Torah learned? I said that by the way. I said Shavuos. But my friend Adam forgive me, Adam, if you're watching this, I don't remember your Hebrew name. Everyone gets all religious on me. You know, used to be Adam. I think it's still his legal name. Could be he's probably Usher. Probably Usher. Usher Chaim. Usher Chaim. I'm I'm not sure. But he said, "What's the most" This is standing outside of Young Israel of Woodmere, Friday morning, yesterday morning. He said, "What's what day of the year is most Torah learned? Come on." Well, you're not thinking. Who said it? Tisha B'Av. You don't watch any of these videos that like you have things whatever and you don't go to sheer him. It's like one after the next AFTER NEXT THE WHOLE YEAR YOU DON'T LEARN TISHA B'AV where you're not allowed to learn you're like oh the fastest hard let me go listen to 12,000 sheer him. It's the craziest concept right? And what's the second place? You said it before. At a Shiva house. You said it? At a Shiva house. It's a confusing question cuz they it's not a time it's a particular right so who is it at a Shiva house? You know I'm not supposed not supposed to say to you know Mishkin Mishkin avail is correct but you know I'm saying and you go into and then you start going to discussing what the How much Torah is learned it's unbelievable. How much Torah is learned at that Shiva house is and people come in and they sit down and they go right away go into I want to tell you of what are you doing? Halacha shut your mouth. Don't say anything until they speak with you don't say a thing. But the two most common things spoken about are like in my situation people start sharing with their thing you think you walk in here no one's going to notice you nice try. And what happens in my situation when I was in that situation and you start telling or what's the other most common spoken thing in a Shiva house? The weather. Oh it's cold yeah. Oh. Woo. It's cold. Oh yeah. Cuz they said it wasn't going to be but it is. Now I can't believe it like how did that happen? What are you doing? Quiet. So then what we have over here is I'm just going to back track for those who lost track of where we are. What I said before the idea of the boy who's crying his eyes out begging the bus driver to crash the bus. And the bus driver is saying, "I'm not crashing the bus." And how many of us have been in scenarios where we begged Hashem, who's the driver, we begged Hashem to do something. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, backtrack. If someone's going through a highly emotional circumstance right now, I ain't talking to you. I ain't talking to you. I'm saying, "Okay, I'm so sorry. It's hard, okay?" I'm not saying a word. So, if you're that person, just chill, take a step back, or not, be emotional, do whatever you want. But I am pointing out that in that case, I can't talk, but I am saying for those who are willing to hear the concept. We diving for something, and then we cry for it, and we don't get it. So, on Shabbos today, we spoke about how sometimes you do get it later, if you remember that story with with my note. But what about when you actually don't get it and the person you were dying for, they die, or this goes I'm going extreme here, cuz people think it's like, "You don't know my kid." I'm saying, "Even that case." I I'm going to say something which is it's radical. It's a radical statement. I'm just quoting the Talmud. Kol mad de avid Rachmana letav, everything Hashem does is for the best. You don't see that at a shiva house. You don't see that at a shiva house. Of course, that's You can't see that the person at a shiva house. But is it true or not? Yes or no? So, the crazy concept is that if I'm speaking to a crowd, there's always going to be someone in the room that's going through something, so they You can't say it ever. What are you talking What are we supposed to do? To be overly sensitive to not to say anything. When we know halacha it's brought down in Siman Resh Lamed, say if hey, that a person is supposed to be magel pumeh, you're supposed to accustom your mouth to say Kol mad de avid Rachmana letav, everything Hashem does is for the good. So, then if someone says, "Well, how could you be so insensitive?" They say it's like, "What do you want me to do? So, I should never say" The Gemara says to say it all the time. It's brought down in the halacha to be saying all the time. Accustom yourself to say these ideas. Everything Hashem does is for the best. Everything Hashem does is for the best. But this one we don't really get. It's It's like It's It's cute to look at the kid on the bus. You're like, "Okay, it's almost cute." But like But we're that kid. We're that kid. When we cry out, we cry out, we don't get it. And then we get upset. Do we understand the fact that there's Hashem? Do we get it? Do Do we understand it? And by we, by the way, I want to make this exceedingly clear. Right before I came here, I sent a message to my wife. I was thinking about something that's upsetting me. Something frustrating me that I that There's something going on. It's It's stupid, relatively speaking. It's a silly thing. But it's bothering me. And right before I left my room, I'm in the suite penthouse suite whatever presidential suite thing. It took me a while just to get to the door. And so finally I got to the door, you know. So as I was coming out, by the way, if you're in it, then I Okay, I'm sorry. I'm in your room as well. Um I thought I thought it weird if someone else came in the middle. Um then I realized it's their room. Fine. As I was walking out, I was like Silly. Silly. Silly. Like silly. Just relax. Take it easy. Silly. The whole thing is silly. Okay, but I'm a human. It's hard. It's hard. This It's not death. It It's not It's not the sickness. It's not loss of money. It's not like whatever. It's just a frustrating situation. It's just frustrating. I I I I'm in this situation, which is frustrating. And I'm quite frustrated. So if you're watching this year Maybe she sent it to that person. It's frustrating. I'm nervous they're going to watch it now, actually. But it's a fresh If they can pick up on what I'm saying, it'll be very good for me. It's frustrating. But call my double for the top. Everything Hashem does is for the is for the good. So It's literally It's not just for the good. It's There's nothing better than that. Okay, someone who lived with such a thing, that's that's a very big thing to say. Am I in the diagram such a level to live that way? The answer is I'm trying to get there. Trying to get there. Trying to really build to a point where I can actually get there. Are we all trying to get there? Don't answer the question. Because one of the most frustrating things that I found, it's not true, that's not true. I I take that back. An interesting thing I find. That's a nice way of saying it. An interesting thing I find is that when I go and I challenge someone, I'm ready. An interesting thing I found, hold on. You didn't do it. Where was I about interesting thing? What was I going to say? Oh. Is when I It's Yeah, well, it's actually frustrating, but it's interesting. Is that when a person says they're working on something that they're actually not working on it. I'm not saying no one's working on it. Many of you are and and if you got offended, then you actually have a lot to work on. But if you didn't get offended, then that means you're working on it. I'm proud of you. An interesting thing is that people say they're working on things when they're not actively working on it. How's it How's it How's your relationship with your No, I'm working on it. Really? Oh, okay. So, what what practical steps are you taking on it to make sure it gets better? I'm working on it. I'm working on it. I'm working on it. You didn't say anything. Well, that means I'm working on it. How is your relationship with your spouse? I'm working on it. What have you been doing to work on it? What? Tell me. What are you You're disgusting. What? What just happened over there? How many times have we fooled ourselves? You can fool other people, but how many have we fooled ourselves? Into pretending that we're working on ourselves as people, becoming a greater person. I'm becoming more more relaxed, more calm. More patient. More giving, more caring, more loving. Really? So, what what steps do you take in order to get there? The steps. Now, there's some people that actually do it. So, the question is, number one, step number one, do you believe there's a God in the world? Don't answer the question, but answer it yourself. Do you believe that there's a God? Number two, do you believe that everything this God does is ultimately for the best? I Yeah, there's a God. Yeah, yeah, everything he does for the best. So, so why do we get frustrated, scared, nervous, anxious, stressed? What what what is all that? If you understood that this is the ultimate real best thing for every circumstance then then we wouldn't have those things. I mean, does it make sense what I'm saying? Think so. What what was the last time you saw that there was a baby being held and it's like as if it's about to fall. You know, cuz that's only if you're dropping it. But even then, watch a parent walking with the kid. It's the craziest thing. They're literally like, "Hey, how's it going over there?" Throw it over here. And the kid is like sleeping. No problem. Totally chill. Totally chill. Totally trusts its parent. Do we totally trust Hashem? That's the question. Do we really Do we totally trust Hashem at such a level that that we're chill? That is what the Chofetz Chaim writes in Shaarei Bitachon. What's the outcome of a person who goes and trusts in Hashem? It's one thing. The entire book I'm going to tell I'm going to spoil I'm going to ruin the whole book for you. The whole purpose of Chofetz Chaim is one thing, and that's chill. That's it. Chill. Tranquilo. Everything's good. Yeah. I'm fine. With the greatest level being able to accept the fact that a sham knows more than we do. The person who really lives a life of trust of bitachon of trust in Hashem is a person who's never really fazed. So so let me reiterate. Am I there? No. I I was in my presidential suite coming in. I was very stressed. And then I was like, "Realize, what am I going to I'm about to talk about this." And then I calmed down a little. So honestly, this is just a group therapy and I want to thank you for coming. Who's next? Hashem is not going to crash the bus. God's not going to crash it. Not going to happen. So I'm not going to let it happen to you. But you might miss the flight. So I I I have to ask for shus if I'm allowed to put this on tour anytime. So we we can't put this up yet. If it's live streaming, then I then whatever will just get upset at me. But we'll have to we'll have to figure it out. I have a cover of mine. His name is Rabbi Yisroel Majeski. He lives in Los Angeles, California. And he shared with me a few weeks ago, he was in New York. It was a Friday morning. He had a flight to catch from New York to LA. His wife said to him, "You better make it." That's a nice way of saying, "If you ever want to see your kids again, make sure you're back by Shabbos." So his flight was at 6:00 a.m. 6:00 a.m. New York LA. It thinks about a 5 and 1/2 hour flight, right? So that'll be 11:30, 3 hours back, 8:30 in the morning. Great. He gets to the airport at 4:00 a.m. Cuz he wants to make sure there's no problems. Flight taking off at 6:00, gets there at 4:00 a.m. Gets to the gate, sits down, waits. Falls asleep. Wakes up at 6:30 a.m. Opens his eyes, looks around, it's like nobody there. He's like, "What?" Runs over to the gate, gives the ticket, the guy says, "Ah, welcome. You're going to China." And he's like, "What?" I I fly to LA. He's like, "Ah, China." He said, "No, no, not LA, you know?" And then he looks at the clock. He's like, "Oh my goodness." He's like, "Oh, no." He loves his kids and his wife. So, he decides he's got to make it. So, so he says, "I need to know the flight. Can you do whatever?" They said there's another flight. I don't know if he was in I think he was in Newark. Is it either Newark or LaGuardia? Whatever, in in a Jersey airport. And he says, they call up there's a flight leaving from JFK at 8:00. So, he said, "Put me on the flight." They're like, "It's already 6:45 and like by the time you get the thing, you can't just get there at 8:00, you know? It's like it takes off at 8:00. You got to get to JFK. It's you know, and then Baruch Hashem, there's generally not traffic between New York and New Jersey." So, so he says, "You know what what what am I going to do? What am I going to do?" So, they said, "Sir, we got to Is it Put me on the flight." He's like, "I'm going to make it." HE'S LIKE, "LORD ALMIGHTY." I don't need your help right now. He goes outside, steps in cab. He's like, "How much to JFK?" He tells him. He's like, "I'll give I'll give you $20 extra if you get me there 20 minutes earlier." He said the guy is driving up walls. He's on the sidewalk and he's He's just one of those like, "We are the man." And he goes to the thing. And he's doing his thing. If you understood what I said, again, more chuva. But the point is he's doing his thing. He's flying there. He gets to JFK. He runs up to the counter. WHOA. AND HE BELTS OUT THE MOST CHAZZANUT SHNIGAN YOU EVER HEARD. HE GETS I WAS SUCH A GOOD NIGHT. AND And uh let's leave the doors open. It's good. He goes ahead and he and he And he gets to the gate and there's no one there. Because everyone was on the plane already, but they didn't close the gate yet. So, he gets there and he makes a joke. He's like, "Oh, it looks like I'm the first one here." You know. And uh he goes and gives his thing. They're like, "Not funny, sir." Beep. You know, "Have a nice flight." Goes through. And he's walking. He's walking up He gets to the He gets on. You know, you know the last guy on a plane is like, "Woo! YOU KNOW, YEAH! WOO!" YOU KNOW, HE GETS ON. I'VE BEEN THAT GUY A FEW TIMES. I clap at people. What do you think? And um Actually, I walk on clapping myself. I'm like, "I'm here!" Yeah. Anyway, I I always I'm always looking for my seat in the first class. It's usually taken. Anyway, I left it in my room upstairs. Anyway, so he gets to his seat and he's thinking He's thinking to himself. He's thinking You know, it's it's it's it's my it's our it's our song. It's our song, you know. So, he says he says uh he says to he tells me the story. He said, "I start walking up and down the aisles trying to figure out why did God send me here? I mean, there's got to be a reason." So, I said, "I think it's cuz you slept." You know, you know, whatever. But, he's like, "No, there's got to be a reason. God sent me here. There's got to be something I could learn from this." So so he's So he's walking up and down the aisles staring to see if anyone's wearing a chai or a mugen david. And then he realized he's getting weird looks as he's staring to see if people are wearing a chai or a mugen david. So so he stopped, you know, like the So he stopped looking. But okay. Nothing. He's like, "This is crazy." He saw one old student of his. And this old student of his uh came along. And and that's the one thing that happened on the flight. That's the whole thing. Just that he saw his own student. And it was it was just like a crazy experience. That Keep going. So he saw this one student. That was it. The whole thing was like Well, he's like, "What was this for?" And he's thinking and he's thinking and he's thinking and he said the following. He's thinking maybe maybe the reason why this happened. To know these things, to be on a level to understand why did God decide something should happen. He was responsible. He got there. He sat there. He was tired. 4:00 in the morning. What do you do? He fell asleep. It was out of his control. Okay, you could try. But okay, what can you do? It's early flight. He thought to himself, "Maybe the reason why this happened is for no reason at all other than to realize one thing. A little reminder to let you know, 'Hey there. It's me, God. You're not in control. I'm in control. I run the world over here. You're not the one who runs it. You're not the one who's going to be in charge of what's happening. Realize and recognize the idea that we don't have control. One of the One of the most freeing moments in a person's life is when they're ready to give up control. It's a very challenging thing. We think we have it. We got it. I got it. I'm the one who can do this. I'm whatever. Let go and let God. Let go and let God. Understand the fact that Hashem knows much more than we do. Hashem knows more than we do. And to come to recognize the fact that Hashem understands what's happening. And maybe take it a step further. Maybe take it a step further. I was in a in a situ- I always have to be careful, especially when there's the the camera and I can't deny it after. I was um Actually, if I do like this, then I could just afterwards claim it was AI. So, I was in a situation recently that I I I felt a certain I don't know how to say this. I really don't know how to even word this without like outing this person, but I'm going to try. What's that? Oh, pause it. Yeah. No. Yeah, it's going to get too complicated. I was in a situation where I did something for somebody. And I and I felt a little bit That's how I felt. I felt a little I just wanted to scream. And I felt that they I felt like they didn't they they didn't they weren't makir tov. They didn't really recognize the good I did for them. I'll tell you where it comes up where in in life, let's say like this. Perhaps those who have children. And they've ever noticed that that a kid maybe doesn't say thank you. And I it's not even just a matter of saying thank you, but you don't have to say the words thank you. But there's it's like not even a recognition of like what you've done. You've done so much for them. And you do so much for them. They don't even recognize what they've done. They don't appreciate it. And not only that, they get upset at you and yell at you. They get upset at you and yell at you. It's not And you literally like, "What are you What's going on over here?" And when that scenario happened, I'm saying with one of my kids, just an easy one to explain. When that scenario happened, I I was thinking I I I'm a I contemplate things in life. And I try to, when I'm in the right state of mind, cuz if it's again, if it's a heck, it's hard. But I try to think, is it possible I do the same thing? Like I'm I'm also not makir tov. I don't come to recognize. And I was thinking in one area, there's an area. Maybe that's my relationship with Hashem. Like do I recognize and do I and do I say thank you to Hashem, to God, for the good that he's done for me? Do Am I makir tov? Makir just means to recognize. Do I recognize the good? And then, do I say it? Do I Do I thank Hashem? Maybe that's why I'm going through this with somebody else. Maybe it's a message for me. And then I thought about it. I was like, I do. I do. I do. I say thank you to Hashem. So, why would I have to go through this? But then I was thinking a little more, and I was trying to think, maybe I don't. Maybe there's an area I don't. And I came to the following understanding. When is it that we say thank you to Hashem? When are we makir tov? When it's tov. It is then that we're makir that it's tov. When it's good, so we're we recognize that it's good. But the funny thing is, you don't need to be makir tov when it's clearly tov. You already are makir that it's tov. If something's good, you don't have to come now to go to recognize that it's good. It's clearly good. So, when do you have to be makir tov? When it doesn't look good. When it looks like it's bad. When you're crying your eyes out and that what you're asking for and that what you want and that's what you're begging. You're saying crash the bus, crash the bus and you're at it's the greatest thing ever. And then it doesn't you don't get what you ask and now you now you're all upset. How many at that moment say I want to thank you so much. I want to thank you so much for that devastating terrible horrible and that could mean you failed the test. Now fill in the blank with whatever it is. I want to thank you for that. To really come to recognize that idea. That's real. That's getting real. The person can come to that idea. That's being mocked here to recognize and to see that good. And then step after mocked here is to now go and thank. I'm in a danger zone. I know I am. I'm in a danger zone and I reckon I'm willing to take the hit. I'll take the hit. I mean I don't know if I don't know if I'm willing to actually I don't know if I'm willing to take the hit so don't don't hit me. But it's a danger zone but I think it's an important I think it's important point to come to recognize. Everything God does is for the good. Everything God does is for the best. It's the best thing ever. It's actually going ahead and to to to verbalize and to say that. To see that. To make it part of us. Easy? Not for me. MS truth? Yeah. Getting to that level? Whoa. Steps that have to be taken to get there. To ultimately come down to recognize I think now we're living in a in a crazy kuffa. A situation which is which is untenable. I mean what's going on in so in Israel. It's it's a very very hard thing. It's very challenging. But for a person to really get down to understand the fact to be able to verbalize and say we pray for stuff and we ask and we say please and we but at the end of the day to come to recognize the fact that Hashem, you know what's the best thing. So, just we're not doing a review yet, but I want to review something that if anyone's heard me speak, you've heard me say this cuz this is something which I speak about a lot. And that's that's the following idea. How does one get to a point where they're able to do that? How does one get to the point where they're able to do it? This is like practically speaking. How is it? Say it. Apply? Apply. Prep is everything. Is that what you're thinking? That's a good one. That's from the archives. I'm not going to do that, but I'm going to borrow something similar to that. I actually in that class is when I said the following story. Like Shulchan Aruch tells us, a person should get to a accustomed to say the concept everything Hashem does is for the best. You can use lashon of gam zu l'tovah if you prefer, that's the Talmud. It's Rabbi Akiva. It's supposed to Nachum Ish. I'm sorry, it's the Rabbi Nachum Ish Gamzu. Gamzu l'tovah. That's a very high dagger to reach, the way that some explain Gamzu l'tovah means to say you recognize this right now is the good itself as opposed to everything Hashem doing is for the best at some point in the future. But at least to be able to say the concept that the kol mad d'vach mal d'tavah but so I personally like to say Gamzu l'tovah a lot. I like to say it's something which is part of my my lexicon. I speak about I say it. And I and I think I did a really good job at one point I noticed how good a job I did at brainwash educating my children. When I don't know how it works in America, you tell me if it's the same thing. In Israel the way that it works is that if you buy a bag of sugar the bag of sugar is generally made out of paper. Do they have that in America also? I don't know who came up with this intelligent design that the bottom should be folded in a way You right? You said okay, it's Charlie? Child proof? Child That's child proof? It's paper. It's paper. Yeah, it's not even Yeah, exactly. Even adults don't know how to do it, right? So so you know, okay, unless you're like one of the the wealthy ones who get like it in plastic or something. It is a very The things they did paper. I opened up in my kitchen. Walked in the kitchen on the right side, there's a cabinet. Opened up the cabinet. And there was a thing of sugar. I lifted it up. I lifted up the paper. I lifted it up. And there was like an idol left of sugar, you know? And I and I said when I lifted up and there's the whole sugar there. I was like My son, who at the time was like younger than now. It's got to be before five. I don't know. Somewhere between zero and five. My son says Gamzu Letova. And I was like Yes. I got him. He said Gam This too is for the best. Gamzu Letova. I was so excited. I totally forgot about the sugar. I was so excited. I was like wow. I can't believe it after so many times of saying this too is for the best. This too but in Hebrew Gamzu Letova. Gamzu Letova. My son said it. But I I looked at him after I saw like on his face an interesting looks. I said to him What does Gamzu Letova mean? And he said It means oy vey. I was like, uh-oh, that's a failure. I thought I kind of botched up the whole thing. Like the whole point is that you're going to go ahead and and learn from this that this is for the best. And now what he's doing instead, he comes out and he says it means oy vey. Uh not only was that a successful, I successfully taught him wrong, you know, completely wrong. I'm thinking, why would he say that? And yes, this is why he said that is because every time I say that it's when something bad happens. So it just translated in his head, you know, like other people have different languages, you know, like, oh no, and uh that's unfortunate, and other things as well. So that's what the ham is saying, oy vey. Okay, that's about inculcating into others, but at least for us it has to be something to understand the way to get to a level is through training. Nobody can generally, there's exceptions, okay, but generally speaking, to be thrown into something when we've never trained for it. We have no experience in it. What do you think is going to happen? Well, it's like I I I decided I'm going to go running. I have no idea what overcame me. I'm sorry, and I uh plenarily never do that again, but I decided I'm going to go running. And and I'm like thinking, you know, they have like these mega marathon runners, like they run for like 4 days straight. Like I got at least run for like 4 hours. You know, that's like at least. And I went out and I started running. It was like um Woo! We're talking about seconds in the first five minutes. I I was like, I could What is I don't want to brag, but I did last like 40 seconds. And I was like, oh my goodness, like I can't I can't do this. But I pushed myself, I did another about 4 or 5 seconds, and then I walked home. And then I crawled into the house. It was just like What do you expect? You go from zero and run a marathon? There's always one in the room. I did it. Okay, so yeah. You know how we feel about you. I didn't do it. You got to train. How does a person get to a level where we're able to be chill, where we're able to say we're able to mark your toe to recognize the good, to be able to understand it, appreciate it, and even say thank you to God. How do we get to that point? You got to train. How do we train? Well, we have opportunities all the time. We just don't realize those opportunities. When you train, it's in small increments. You don't just right away start running. It's in small increments. How many times you have something like that happen? Then you just chalk it off like whatever. You don't say say bad, you don't say good, you just go uh. Right? There are things that happen in life that just it is what it is. We're like just things occur. And we have to come to recognize a day that that That's not something which is really When those opportunities happen, take advantage of them. When that happens, but what do you mean? It doesn't bother me at all. That's not true. It doesn't bother you enough, but it bothers you at all. And that is an incredible opportunity for growth. And if at that moment you say don't say you say You say I'm Zulu Tova. So then what happens is if anything gets more intense, now you've begun the process of saying I'm Zulu Tova. Now you can get more and more to Oh, yeah, and it raise the bar. Raise the bar. And we all go through challenges and then understand that's the reason we exist. We're put here in order to overcome challenges to become greater to become bigger. That's why we're here. The mistake is when we give up all these opportunities to grow. And if we were to take them step by step, one thing at a time, we have hundreds a day of things that don't go the way that we want perfectly. Use as an opportunity for growth. Use that for training. To say, I I G, it's all good. It's all good. You're able to recognize, say it, speak it out. Then as we get more and more if we able to handle even those bigger ones. And even though we may pray for something and cry for something, at the end of the day we recognize that this is still the best thing for us. Okay, I I I already got yelled at enough today. So I'm going to do a quick recap of everything we did. End up with one point and then we can go hear other things if anybody wants. So we started off in the beginning in the beginning. Why would you give up the bus when you can go and crash the bus? I'm not crashing the bus. Why would you just crash the bus? It says because this is the worst thing for you. I'm not going to crash the bus. And he said, I got it. What the heck? I got it. Highly emotional circumstance, highly emotional circumstance. Don't ask What kind of cake? What kind of cake? What kind of cake? Don't ask the person. The person is all angry and say, oh, calm down. Person lost the day in front of him. Oh, let me give YOU A HUG. BACK OFF. Back off. Stop speaking divrei Torah. Stop. Back off. Just be there quiet. Don't say a word. Just be. That's it. That's what a person needs to feel is that you're here with me cuz there's nothing really to say. There's nothing to say other than to be there and to recognize I care for you. I love you. You can you can you can rely on me. I'm there for you. That's it. That's what a person needs to say. Then we got a little friend of the story of Chasky goes and he missed the plane over there 4:00 6:30. Oh, China. He said, "No, I'm not going to China." But I want to go there. 20 minutes. $20. Right then he comes over there and what does he do? Oh. I should I should finish up? Okay, let's let's so let's do a quick recap. All right, okay. So then then what we do is he's out of here. All right, so he said what's the idea of trusting in Hashem? There's a really going to trust in Hashem and really going to go for this and be a macro to be a macro. Macro to means to macro the things that don't look like they're tough. To bring the fact that all of that's the greatest thing ever. Although that's painful and it's hard and it's challenging and it's difficult. But a person needs to get to the point if you want to grow. If you're not there am I there? I'm not there yet. It's hard. It's hard. It's a challenge. It's difficult. But at the same time are we trying to get there? Yeah, no, we are. Yeah, what steps are you taking in order to get there? I'm trying. But I'm trying. How? By trying. You know, that's how that's how I'm doing it by trying. When a person starts taking these steps I'm going to say in the fact that these challenges that are going on and we slowly but surely go and see the concept that this too Oh, I forgot. I know but this too is for the best. And someone who comes and realizes this idea then slowly but surely we develop a strength. We become stronger and we could run more than 40 seconds. We could run a minute. Then we could run 3 minutes and 5 minutes and we could overcome and we become greater and stronger and more powerful, more connected and closer. And that's the goal of what we're trying to accomplish here. To get to the ultimate level of understanding the fact that Hashem runs the world. He knows more than I do. Number one there's a God and he's the one who runs it and he does the best thing which is ultimately the best thing for me. And even though I don't see that's the best thing for me. Let me try to work on getting to be able to see that by saying God is all good with the smaller things that it's going to open my mind to get to the ability that I'm going to be able to see really the biggest thing that well, you got to learn as I got mentioned be blessed. Peace. The whole thing. Okay.