Perfectly Measured, Rebuking R’ Akiva! Paying Shirt’s Worth, Which Shul to Support & More (Vayigash)

Good morning. Welcome. Welcome to our viewers on Torah anytime as well. want to dedicate this year for the of him and his family for the of who is in a coma as well as the great Simra of the the engagement of my dear Kusa's son Tahila Lewis and the one who's responsible is sitting right here and we should all say thank you to you Ahmed should be uh two announcements. First of all, I mentioned that a few weeks I'm going to speak in different communities in the state. So that will be the shabases of we won't have a all the shabases are taken but there's still a few days available if communities want in it's a a weekday shir. The other very happy announcement that we spoke about a few weeks ago with,200 pages came out. The first one came out about 17 or 18 years ago with only 700 pages and I thought I covered the whole subject with 700 pages. A few years later it came out B and then another 700 pages and I was sure that's it, 1400 pages on one topic, you know. Gmail comes out with another 700 pages and then a few years later with 1200 pages and now hey with 1200 pages and I understand that I probably didn't even scratch the surface because it's not every so often sometimes we see measure for measure that is how conducts his world measure for measure. So you just have to open your eyes and wear these special glasses and everything turns into and you see it and everybody's always searching what is the mid and in fact one has to search for it because the says that one who always looks for the mid but wait a second why did this happen over here why did this happen to me in this specific situation this specific day why when he always wants to see in that matter He is the one who's going to be so he's going to see because he always looked for he will be all those who are interested there some in the back and the whole set obviously one can [clears throat] purchase that as well >> any parts in English. Yes, there are parts in English because the migillas two volumes came out in English in Hebrew and in English is in English and will come out with volume two in Hebrew and in English and there's the benture which is in Hebrew and in English benture with interpretation. Now we can finally start the year will be speaking about the missing link in our collective DNA. There's something missing. Who in the world had permission to rebuke on a ongoing basis? Do you have to pay the shirts value? And how much how much does your shirt really cost? Taking very dangerous long strides when you need to choose between shoes to support. Which one should you choose? And the milliondoll questions, how do we find love for how do we get which I think is a question on everyone's mind? Maybe we'll have a few more things in between, but we'll start with the with the riddle. Did he have a daughter? Not everybody together. Did Ysef had a daughter? Joseph, he had a daughter. her name. >> I don't know her name. But all the children of >> you taught her in seminary. How do you know? >> All the boys got accompanied to a girl. >> All the boys thevatim. What happened to them? They had >> a twin girl. Sister. >> Ah. You saw a twin sister. Rashi says over there that every one of the tribes had a twin sister born with him. But but you didn't look at the the gu says yes except Ysef. has why that isn't and even if you want to say Ysef in fact had a twin sister when we all go down to Mit how many people were there >> 70 >> 70 you just told me there are another 12 twins and with binyamin there two twin two sisters where are they how come they're not counted >> it's a good question >> it's a good question she addresses this question she asked wait a second I just told you that there's the twin sister with every one of the tribes. How come they're not counted? And Rashi is forced to say because of this question, they all died before they went down to time. >> You want to kill them because you have a question. You know there's a famous rule in the yeshiva world. You don't die from a question. You have a question, keep going. Keep going. Keep learning. One day you'll find the answer. And even if you don't, sometimes you have an amazing question. What? So what he doesn't stop everything also knew everything that you know and maybe he had an answer maybe he didn't but he continued you can also continue from a question you don't die but here because of this question Rashi is killing the sisters very strange why was Rashi forced to kill him because he has a question what's the question >> if you're counting and you get to 70 and these girls are not there obviously they died But Rashi doesn't know this rule that you don't die because of a question. He's killing people because of a question. So some say jokingly how did these girls how were they born? What's the word gum doing there? Grammatically it's not needed. Someone say oh gum. Oh I have a question. What is GUM DOING? OH, GUM TO INCLUDE gum comes to just like and gum is gum comes to include that there was also a girl born with every one of which means these girls were born out of a question because you had a question. People who are born just because of a question they also died because of a question. [clears throat] Jokingly back to our question did a did he have a daughter or not? Yuda says to Ysef as she brings to the Are we asking for your daughter? What are you getting so excited? Obviously implying that Ysef has a daughter. Otherwise, it's very not nice to say this to who doesn't have any kids. Am I asking for your son? For your daughter? He doesn't have any kids. So, obviously Ysef had a daughter. If you can address him and say, "Am I asking for your daughter?" That's a proof that Ysef had a daughter. >> Who did a friend who was married? >> What's that? Who did a Friday to marry? >> I don't know why I wasn't invited to the wedding. >> So I don't know. >> Hazal, don't tell us. You have to assume not. They were converted just like everybody else at that time. By the way, at that point there's no Jewish people. And whom did yadik marry? >> Who is she? The daughter of >> is the you know the you know you know what does the say the daughter of not a problem who did he marry >> converted them even though there's no Jewish people he took them out of the belief in let's speak about was the ultimate not IN YOUR HEY, WHAT DID YOU DO? THEY said it's also it's also a very nice way of by the WAY I'M NONE OF YOU SOLD ME. I'm when you are stuck with the ems in your face. Is my father still alive? Cuz I don't know cuz I'm stuck here for 22 years. Part of them is an evid because of you guys. I'm not saying that this very very surprising Gmor about to the Gmorian speaks about this medish also appears in the Gmorra says Omar heaven and earth are my witnesses many times He got it. I don't want to say lashes cuz that's the literal translation. That's not what it means. You know why? I used to go and complain about him. You see it today. Would give it to to his young disciple. But don't worry, but I wanted to fulfill the says don't rebuke a scoffer because he may hate you. If you rebuke, he's going to love you. So, love me even more. But this bears some questions. What's going on here? Four questions. Rashi explains when he saw something which is totally unbecoming he went to and complained what in the world he see that was doing which is what does it mean he says not once not twice many times don't you get it the first time they have to come back to you again it Again, again this is about sad of going to not right what you're doing. No, he leaves and he goes behind his back. It's about what's going on. I think it's the strangest. At first glance I thought to say maybe we're talking about it in the beginning stages of because came from a background you know he didn't grow up in the mir and not in the lakewood is a sort of type of a thing so maybe it's a midos are not so polished what's the proof used to say you know when I was young when I was an I used to say give me and I'll bite him like a donkey. Say why you say a donkey bite him like a dog. You mean a dog right? Says no a dog bites but he doesn't break the bones. I used to want to bite and break their bones like the donkey. So that's the he came kind of rough not uh you know so refined. That's what I thought at first glance and I saw a saying this called and I think to say this how can you say this? You know why? Because about the daughter of it says over there who was the shepherd of her father and why did you decide to marry him if he is so rough he's not and he's unrefined why do you want to marry him says because she saw that is because he was humble and he was refined SO HE HAD TO be ah you're asking how can you say such a statement Give me a and I'll bite him like a donkey. So already answered this says as an he didn't understand what the were doing. He thought that the hate the ignoramises that he was part of. He didn't hate. HE THOUGHT THEY'RE ARROGANT. That's what he said. He thought they didn't want to touch him because a ignoramicist are disgusting. No, it's just because they didn't want to get tumor. So it wasn't coming from a place of he had this he thought that were not conducting themselves in a certain way the right way. So it's not a sh wasn't refined. Yeah. Mahalak why he was doing this. So I don't think you can say because the whole reason she married him is because ads he was showing me. So he was he was humble. He was just [clears throat] so what in the world something which is disgraceful for you see many many times and therefore he has to rebuke not through goes around and once and twice is not enough and he keeps doing it again and again again what can it be this bothered me for years [snorts] I think seven and a half years until one day gave me this thought and I think it works says I must come from before we explain I have to go to say so I have to go to a friend shop and start acquiring friends how does it work go spend money and buy yourself what does that mean on that Mishna explains go find yourself a that will rebuke you it's not a yes man whatever you Oh, you're the greatest. You're so smart. You're so successful. A good is the one who corrects your wrong mid your wrong ways. But similar again when the Mishna says what's the right path that a person should walk on and three opinions a good friend about explains a good is the one who fixes you who rebukes you. He tells you when you're doing something wrong. That's a good he actually cares about you. What's that? The goa actually used to call every so often the mid to rebuke him. You of great maleim. You can awaken me to do some cha mid came to I should give ma to you. Yes, that's a good which means sadikim always want to excel. So you find yourself somebody and you tell them ahead of time if you see anything wrong that I'm doing please please tell me because my mission in life is one I just want to grow I want to ascend higher and higher on the ladder of of I want to get close to and I need some to help me do that you can say the same thing about if it's good for the go it's also good for the came to he says do me a favor you're a good Whenever you see me doing something wrong, let me know. You know what? I even need the permission to give to the because tells me for sure I will change. Great. But what is that thing that is doing again again? Rashi says Rashi doesn't say Rashi doesn't say bad. What is that appears twice in the says it's disgraceful for to be wearing patched shoes. Ah, look at you. You look like a It's not right. You represent. It could be in the dun we learned was very very poor. THAT'S WHAT HE WEARS AND HE DOESN'T CARE for two reasons. First he doesn't care about gashmir. Who cares about my shoes? I just want to learn to second of all I'm poor. Can't afford it. THIRD OF ALL I DON'T THINK that discusses he's so humble. That's the SAYS WHO AM I? I KNOW WHERE I CAME FROM. He sees him walking out like that and says no no good. It's told him to be walking like this and says, "They weren't talking about me. Are you kidding me?" And therefore, he did it again and again and again. So, he was forced to go to the says, "Listen, it's a bizarre. It's a go and tell he's not allowed to because to me he's not listening because he's so humble." He thinks this doesn't apply to him. Maybe in a different way. Alf the says and the source is from the same it's for him it's disgraceful for him to sit in auda with ignoramicism sitting in a with says no good says I hold like it's only going to be written 1500 years later what do you mean it's okay I I you're allowed to say you're not allowed to over there inf brings different opinions when this may be permitted for example in is the problem no problem you're sitting in and some are sitting with you according to the are you fine there are that permit it what do you want from me I'm sitting in a it's not more than that for and two of says of course you're allowed to say I don't think you're allowed to even for that purpose says you don't understand you know I was a shepherd I know these guys I know how to speak to them for me it's it's a mitzvah it's a great mitzvah to be involved in k I have to be sitting with him says I don't think so what people see from the outside is sitting with ignoramis [clears throat] says it's disgraceful or was sitting in his place in his regular table and the came to him says in case of that there are opinions that permit it. It's not that he went to they came to him or he was sitting with a group of and in that case if there are some ignores as well that permit it we have therefore he says it doesn't work with so he feels you're not allowed to he goes to say look he's sitting with it's a it's not an issue it's not And that's why it keeps happening again and again again because doesn't want to listen to him because he says to him what's the it's talking about doesn't even start and even if it does I don't know that you're right. How great was the four snippets there's many more in the language of the he is considered one of the if it wasn't for would be forgotten from Israelenu turns to and says you have a person like this And you choose to give toya through me. Why not through? Because he's greater says things that were revealed to were not revealed to knew the truth is the greatest person. All the that we have today is from because after all his passed away. He passed on to his five and that's everything we have the Mishna the everything that we have he knows how great is and we say you can't do this that's why he keeps going back to refuses to accept it HE SAYS WHO AM I WHO am I is walking in his path we found in another example of a night it's disgraceful to walk out alone at night unless he has a people may suspect him at night you go you know there's no electricity outside where you going doesn't look good doesn't smell good stepping out of his house again and again again again you're not allowed to say what are you talking about this about not about me and he also doesn't have this he goes to the to complain about it and this way it solves all questions. How come again and again again because they hold it doesn't apply? That's why it's not that's why he goes to it just doesn't work. You can say that if he said doing something that's not correct, we have to find excuses. >> You're sending us to and says after the fact if you see that you see in your eyes something that you think he did in last night, you have to judge him favorably. But don't give re people reasons to suspect you. It's the before and after. Moving on. Ysef gives five new suits to everybody else. He gives only one. And he also gives him some cash. How much? >> 20. >> 300. Where'd you get that from? Why are you giving binyamin 300? And why daamin and no one else? What's when the says came back to the pit rashi says what do you mean came back says the day that they sold him he wasn't there where was he serving his father that means every single day somebody else they took turns they had shifts today you taking care of daddy tomorrow you're okay 12 tribes everyone has to take care of daddy. Everybody has to be there to serve him. How many days a year? How many days in a year? >> Yeah. But if you don't have to help daddy, everybody's there. You have to take care of him on weekdays, but everybody is out of the house. So you have to take 300 days, and that's also a number that represents how many days you put on because you don't put on. So you have 300 days divided by 12 tribes. How many days does each tribe get to take care of daddy? 300 divided by 12 >> 25 >> 25 DAYS PER kid Ysef wasn't around for 22 years he didn't serve his father so how many days does he owe the system he owes all the fathers the all the brothers 22 years times 25 days a year that I'm supposed to serve my father 22* 25 550 wait a second it's like hiring workers if you're supposed to show up at the job and you're not somebody else comes instead of you, you have to pay them. So he has to pay. But wait a second, I don't have to pay the brothers that sold me. So out of the 11 brothers, 10 I don't have to pay. If there's 550 days that he owns the system and every brother out of the 11 has to take his place. So how many days per brother? 550 divided by 11? 50. 50 time 11, right? 550. So every brother I have to pay 50 days. I'm not going to pay 10 brother that sold me because they cause it to themselves to start working extra. If I need to pay someone, it's only been on me. He wasn't involved in the sale. So how many days do I have to to give him? >> I have to compensate for 50 days that he worked extra throughout those 42 days. 32 years correct. The is if you make an agreement with your worker how much you're going to pay him per day. So you have to pay according to the agreement. But what if you didn't? You hired a person for the job and you didn't make up ahead of time. How much is your wage? What do you do? You pay him af six mouse. In other words, six coins of silver. Oh, if I have to pay six coins silver per day, 6* 50 days that I mean 6 * 50 is 300. And therefore, he gave him 300 silver. You need dessert or comes the many many after the say the same thing without seeing the because they thought about it on their own. We said was not a part of the sale. The other brothers that did sell him we have to penalize them. If somebody sells a person to be a slave by a you have to penalize him. How much do you penalize him? 10 times the amount of his worth. The worth of the How much is an worth? They saw the worth of the value of the times 10 is 300. So I have to penalize all the brothers 300 each. Byam didn't sell me. So I really wanted to give them 300. I'm not they have TO BE PENALIZED AS IF BIN comes and takes the 300 of each one of them. But not Binyam was part of the sale. So he can get 300 KF and that's why Ysef gives Dava only and he doesn't give the other brothers. He also gives him though five new suits. Why five suits? says the one for the fact that Binyamin had to tear his suit as the pasu says that when they found the goblet in the sack of beyam they all tear their clothes I caused you to tear your suit here's one the second one as you're my brother from the same mother the third one because I accused you of being a gun busha what embarrassment you know what here take another suit from it for that and another two we already have three another two because as a gun you have to pay. So because as if I cause you to be obligated to pay here's another two suits all five suits together the panaz is one of the bal so they ask why did he give him suits on a new car maybe a laptop why suits are they missing clothes did they come with ripped clothes look you guys look you look terrible why don't you get a new suit why did the dafka give them suits And the and the explained because he caused them to tear their shirts when they heard oh the is in it's terrible you I cause you to tear your shirt I'm going to give you a new shirt instead. That's why the says in Hebrew is a suit but that's not what it means is from language of khalif switcheroo. I tore I cause you to tear your shirt. Here's another shirt. INSTEAD BASED ON that Ruven kill now is doing cha. He comes and he asks the rabbi. When I killed Shim, his kids said chiva. When they said Shiva, they all to do I have to pay Shim's sons the value of the garment that they tore. You see Ysef is paying the brothers because I caused you to tear your shirt. I'm going to pay you another shirt. If a person kills another person and because of that his kids sitting Shiva and they took does he have to pay them the value of their shirt? Is this one of the ways of doing an ultimate? What do you say? You don't like it. Why not? So explain Ysef. What was Yseph doing? just being a nice guy. Shuva, what was he doing? Get him a laptop. Why are you getting him a shirt? I caused you to rip the shirt. I'm gonna give you a new one. >> So the the murderer SAYS THE SAME THING. I CAUSED YOU to rip your shirt. Here's the shirt instead. >> There's a few differences >> and they are >> one is that here in killing Shim said they had a creo to Creo and Ysef it was a toast. He sort of tricked them into >> but they don't know. Ysef felt bad. I caused do this. Ysef had to make them look like Ganavim. He had to do this. >> Not the difference. >> I don't understand the difference. Let's settle this one first. >> Yeah. >> Okay. Second one. >> That [clears throat] the um the normal way of life is that this man will pass anyways and it's >> a Yeah. Yeah. Look anyways at one point the father's gonna die and you're gonna take YES. SO I CALLED YOU to do it a little earlier. What's the big deal? But if that's the case, let's reverse the question. Killed Shiman's son. But the father will never rip the shirt for his son because he's going to die before him. So do you have to pay the father for ripping his shirt sitting Shiva for his son? >> Nice try. >> Nice try. [laughter] >> Shirt that the father ripped. >> I'm sorry. >> The son would ya the shirt that father ripped and then he would have to rip it anyways. >> Who would want to wear a ripped shirt? He's going to throw it to the garbage. No, that shirt would live and then the son reactions in the shirt and then rip it. >> I think as soon as the father gets up from his hea there who keeps torn shirts >> the father ripped because his son was sitting his son he lost his son as soon as the shiva ends he throws away the shirt. There's no and if he's saying the reverse if he didn't kill this son. So at one point he would be the shirt and this shirt will be told when the father dies. And who told you he [clears throat] would use this shirt? >> I think in a gma that's what I wanted you to say. What's a gramma? Indirect damage. Are you for indirect damages and therefore I asked if is it one of the way to rectify we did not but that's only if one wants to be even on a he should pay but who says the gma isn't this ai is more direct even though it's not mish mish direct but It's a higher level than GMA and for GI we do obligate in Bin. And when one kills his friend, he knows that his kids will have to say isn't it closer to GI bigish. >> No, we cannot say because that's when the two things happen at once. A person steals and isab. So we say, "Wait a second. You have to get for and you have to pay back what you stole." No, forget about the forget about the stealing. We'll just charge him for the skil. These two things happen at once. But if he violated chabas and 5 minutes later he stole, we don't say, "Oh, let's give him the the bigger the punishment." That's only when they happen at once. The ka happens after the father dies. So it's not very surprising and the quotes and I think we mentioned it last year or two years ago when in the middle of the war I don't know remember why certain came up is sending a for business you're a driver please drive to Shal and bring me something do some business for me the Shalia embarks on his journey and something happens car accident, a heart attack, something dies. Does the who sent him has any responsibility for the fact that his Shalia died on the way? Has nothing to do with him. He gave him some money. He gave him a package delivered in Yushim. He started driving. Half an hour later, two hours later, he died on when he's on his way to the says, "If you choose to give something to the orphans, it's the right thing to do." He's not obligating him, but he does say it's the right thing to do. You see, there is a level of responsibility towards the next generation. Even though it's a it's not even a grandma for sure, it's not even a gramma. What does it HAVE TO DO WITH THE FACT THAT THERE WAS A MICHIGAN driver or the himself was a Michigan DRIVER OR A HEART ATTACK? But the he was working on my behalf at that time. It's a but you see there is a level of responsibility. So can't we say that the same thing will apply here? You still don't like it? >> What's the difference between >> killed Shim? Shim's son said Shiva there is no level responsibility but the went in the cab have nothing to do with him I should give a nice gift to the orphans it's the right thing to do here killed the other person killed intentionally or unintentionally but he killed him directly he doesn't have any responsibility towards the kids he caused him to tear the you don't like it >> it's Good. It's good. It's good. I I don't think I don't like it actually. Why? And I think you touched a little. You hinted to it. When the brothers, why did they do it? They were so embarrassed. And then the med says they were even more embarrassed to walk around with torn clothes. Oh boy. Were they embarrassed? Because it feels terrible for them. I caused you embarrassment. Then I want to pay you. When the kids sitting Shiva tearing or the father sitting sh for his son, why is he doing it? THE MAH. IT'S A MITZ TO CATCH. So I want to compensate you when I cause you a loss. That's to the brothers. I didn't cause you a loss. You think you lose when you're doing mitzvah. Now we don't recommend this. [laughter] This person should do this in order to gain mitz for other people. No. But after the fact it comes out that when he did tear he did a mitzvah. If you're involved in a mitzvah there's no loss. If there's no loss I don't have to pay your doesn't have to pay. Sends the brothers away. One of the opinions brought what does it mean when he says to them? It means you have told him don't take long strides. Why? Because what does taking long strides do to your eyesight? It takes away one 500 60 >> one of 500 of one's eyesight in which we quoted from before the same page the same says it's disgraceful to take long strides it takes away one's eyesight why is it more so than anybody else you want to keep your eyes wants keep his eyes. So, but when he takes long strides, it's not becoming of you. Why not? What's the connection? What's the difference? The higher level that we require from more so than regular people different answers over the he explains two ways [snorts] really applies to both regular people and but there's an extra measure for to be careful here because the says in what happens to a takes bribe It makes the person blind. So if this guy is going to lose his eyesight because he takes long strides, that's what it does. The game says, "What are people going to start saying about him?" You know why he lost his eyesight? The guy said people come to him. Oh, [screaming] we know. And even if he's not a kava, it has to be that he had some kind of a and people will suspect him. And therefore that's in other words on top of the bodily damage you're going to lose your eyesight there's also going to be if a person is because people are going to be talking about you. The other explanation says that must make sure to maintain good eyesight because there's many instructions that he has to give that are dependent on the eyes seeing the blood of a woman you're going TO SEE REALLY WELL. SO WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU LOSE your eyesight and people come to you especially those people used to come to you last year and you know how to pass say I'm I'm so sorry I can't answer what happened. Oh yeah, I don't see what Oh, you don't see. Okay, fine. It's at Vagna. It's at Vagna. And therefore should be careful more so than other people. The reef. Who's the reef? >> No, that's the who's the other on the reef of Pinto maybe 450 something that years ago. He's not the from the And he explains in two different ways. It's true that if you take long strides you may lose your eyesight but there's a for it over there says what how do you fix it you look at the wine when you do kdish Friday night and some suggest of it fixes your eyesight so what's the problem says it's not right to put himself in danger and then go looking for the looks forward into the future and if you know activity is dangerous even though potentially there is a for it. Why would you do that? It's not right for himself this way. Second of all, he adds and he says it's true that it fixes his but when loses eyesight and he's going to do kdish, what do you think he's going to be thinking about? He's going to be thinking, I hope this works I'll be able to see better. It's not right. We want you to have the ultimate kavana. Stay away from long strides. When you doda, you'll be able to have kavana. Another fifth answer. Don't bring this. That one is not allowed to take long strides. And therefore, you see people running to the bank before it closes running to the bus not to miss it. People do it. So if it's not what is left that's what's in that that if take if one takes long strides may endanger his eyesight what's the connection to eyesight and and long strides comes the he explains why does a person take long strides where's he rushing to he wants to get and grab those things that his eyes saw he wants TO GET THEM QUICKLY SO HE TAKES BIG STRIDES. AH, so you know what? Because of that, you're going to lose your eyesight. So, how can Shabas fix it? Cuz what does the P say about Shabas? And Shabas, you sit in your place. YOU DON'T RUN AFTER your eyes. If you do that correctly, Shabas comes and fixes one's eyesight. So, finally, just a few comments. had that wonder replenish the eyesight by looking at the ner 250 also when you lose when one loses 500 is it 500 every time >> yeah yeah yeah the so 500 times I take long strides 500 strides and it's over no it's 500th of what's left similar to will also give people who are sick and the says one who goes to visit the sick takes 1/60th of the disease So the government says, "Oh, so let 60 people come and visit the sick and it's over. It's 160th of what's left. So you need a little more than other doesn't become blind. I'm saying it's a very very negligible amount of eyesight." >> Who told you to lose? >> Maybe it depends on the length of the strike. I don't know. >> He can lose his eyesight to what degree don't know. Maybe he does things to counter it and he's going to gain more eyesight. Don't know. in we just learned he said that is to run and he's allowed to shabas you're not allowed to run forget about long strides you're not allowed to run but running to shab you're allowed to fight mitzvah when is allowed to run finally after 22 years is united with his son what's comes the again and says look I Bohu runs the world in a measure for measure mida mida fashion and how exact and precise is 22 years ago the 22 22 years yakov didn't serve his father where was he by love he wasn't with his father so now ysef is taken away from him for 22 years and he can't save him but within the 22 years this already ash brings it but within the 22 years it's so exact so he brings ashi says 22 years that Ysef was in mit without Yakov corresponding to the 22 years that Yakov didn't fulfill 20 years that he was in the house of Lavan in two years when he is traveling from Lavan back to his home. So says in all those 22, let's break him up. There's seven years, the first seven years that he worked with for in order to have a wife. That's what didn't then his mother say to him, listen, go to my go to get a wife, sit until you and how much did he work? These days, these years seem to him like a few days. So this is the same which means he had permission to be in the house of he didn't fulfill the but he didn't transgress anything. Then comes 13 years that he stays more by and that's without the so not only does he not fulfill kibu he's wrong to be here. The first seven years he's not fulfilling but he's okay to be here because his mother sent him. The next 13 years he's even wronged to be here and he's not fulfilling the mitzvah. The last two years we have already 20. The last two years he is longing to go back to be with his father to serve him. As the pastor says, love says to him because he yearned so much to go back. So those two years obviously are measured differently. Says Ysef look what happened to Ysef. Unbelievable. Se 13 years Ysef was betar. He came at the age of 17 all the way to the age of 30 when he stands in front of a po he was a slave he sat in jail that's 13 years connected the 13 years that Jacob didn't have permission to stay in the house of Lan 7 years he was still away from him but as a king as a king that corresponds to the seven years that Yakov had permission to be with Lavan but let didn't fulfill kibbu but at least he's not suffering and the two years is when Yakov heard heard and is there and he really was dying to see him. The med says that he had such a yearning to see for two years corresponding to the two years that he had a YEARNING TO GO BACK to see his father because says all my measures are done. It's exact. It's so so so precise sends first says what does it mean to open up a best medish you don't go to a place if there's no best med if there's no sh you don't go there since this is me it gives us a chance to ask a question I think it's a very common question Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday in Jewel A. I think many people maybe even people sitting here mish applies to them right week in one sho are different now both shs are having a campaign they need your money they're building a new shoe renovations whatever it is sh campaign A and sh campaign B want your money you can only give to one sh maybe there's some here that need to know this you can only give to one sh which sh you prefer the wig sh or the shabul you're saying shabis and you think we're going to money somebody's pocket without giving a ayah just because it's a chabas you got to give me substantiated give me some documentation something >> so on the school on the application they ask you where do you d on shabas because they realize there's no kus for Sunday Wednesday one day you're here one day you're there but let's say you always dive in on weekdays in one shoe and you do have kus and shab in a different one whom should you give the money to can only give to one >> the show that you learned during the I don't learn learn at home with the kava. I learn the best a different one than the sh talking [snorts] about dik membership. >> What's that? >> Membership >> in both. >> In both >> in both or neither. >> Prepare both. >> There's no membership in both schools. They don't ask for membership. But they do need your money now for a campaign. They're building the place. Renovations. Very applicable. Shabas. >> What's that? Shabas. Why? Yes. >> And you think as you're a gaba you come to me say I think you should give to us because you got your shabies. I say tell me why >> and therefore I'm going to keep shabis everything and I'm going to have does it say giving money to that I d that provides a maybe you have to add and add that as well. >> Is there an opinion that says when you learn Friday morning >> I don't learn the whole week in I learn somewhere else. I d in a >> weekday. I in B. What do you say? >> What's that? >> Oh, how many times do I d on weekdays? >> 18. >> 18. And only three times in Shabas. Is it? >> Let's see. [snorts] >> Unbelievable. unbelievably brings the words says it's a mitzvah to but it's a mitzvah to come to together and to praise that's the language so shab you have kadusha and maybe shabis also is just like shabas is k Shabas is more of a cruise and that's why they [clears throat] ask you on the resume where you ask where do you dab maybe ask it's a I but you do have what do you do when you have a problem called comes first something which is frequent comes first before something which is infrequent but when you have something which is moreash when a and a are clashing what do you do you go to and the says unreason resolve. Do whatever you want. When you have an issue of you pick but also have some very it's a heavy weight and therefore you can pick whatever that's the right thing to do is to split the money to give both if you can. So one month give only to this jewel the next month give to the other work here as a >> why not >> I mean think about >> I come visit this place 18 times during the week >> here we're saying do instead of this usually t before here we're not saying give and donate to the >> good so if I can only give to one I prioritize the and I gave up oh now I'm stuck I can't give the shad okay >> it's a technical thing once I was able to give because I'm supposed to I'm left with no money suffers but what can I Okay. Well, we don't say that regarding Kaneka, do it lights, right? Kaneka lights or mar which comes first, right? >> Depends. What? >> Depends. >> So, >> that's what the Mishna Bua wants you to light a certain time. The Mishnab wants you to light a certain time before comes and therefore you don't run into the problem of so make sure you light before. If you go into the the time that you already can destabazim will light most of them 5 minutes before 10 minutes after 15 minutes 20 minutes 5 minutes before it says before I can d in order not to run into this problem because and they both unve is and that's >> what is >> no it's a po some differently Every p is different than kanuka. It's not a minute of the place. It's a min of your rav or whoever you follow. >> So what if without your full money one of the one of the crew going to close? >> That's a consideration. >> I mean so you have you split if you split it doesn't help. >> No that's a new consideration. We're just showing and you're saying something else. If it wasn't for you the place is going to close down. >> So which oneize >> the one that's going to close? We'll forget about the Don't forget about Tanya. >> No, no, both of them. Both of them. >> Both of them will close. >> So then we go back. >> So [clears throat] if I only have I can only give to one, our question comes back and we ignore this consideration. We're back to Tad and Mesh. And whoever you prioritize, whoever depends which Gabby gives you more alos throughout the week. Ysef is getting ready to meet his father Yankeev and Bashim. They finally do meet and Ysef is running running running towards Jacob. JACOB SAYS, "OH, STOP." OH, the ultimate ine there's nothing like it. Really, what Yak wants to do is to run like Michigan, hug and kiss him like there's no tomorrow. 22 years I was waiting for this, but he realizes something bigger than that. And that's and from him I have everything that I have and I have to say thank you to the highest level. How do we get there? The says one must say when will my deeds reach those of my forefathers? I want to have that. How does one reache? I think it's a million-dollar question that is on everyone's mind and if it's not it must be and we have to [clears throat] try and progress and become better at this and have stronger and more intense love to how. So there are a few ways says it says you're commanding me you shall love but I still don't know how. How do you do it? Go and learn when you learn. No matter what, you're going to fall in love with great. What if I'm a woman? Doesn't apply to me. What if I can't sit and learn too much? I don't know. He's a doctor. He's performing surgery after surgery after surgery after he's doing great but he can't provides the path called learning to comes. He says, "I have a different one." And he will see the unbelievable wisdom of infinite wisdom. Immediately he's going to love he's going to praise and he's going to have this unyielding desire to know. By the way, many people misinterpret this and they think the Rambam here was either a travel agent or worked for a travel agent and this says YOU MUST GO TRAVEL, GO TO THE EVEREST, GO TO THE GRAND CANYON. THAT'S NOT the Ram says you don't have to travel. The Ram doesn't say you have to see spectacular things. He says boo look at each other open the window every single morning and say wow I see sunrise I see the I see mountain I see whatever I have in front of me that's a kish maybe if you happen to go to the grand canyon you will see him again in a different place a different way wow but there's no to go there if you go get you'll enjoy it okay so we this is very important because I I think many people think that the raam had some kaks in a travel agency I don't know So we have we have I don't want to say traveling because what if a person doesn't like to travel? He doesn't have shadows. He's closer to place. He can't look out. A third way is if your neighbor that you're not crazy about started giving you $1,000 every single day, will you not love him? He doesn't owe you anything. And every morning he comes knocking on your door, he's a th00and. What if he gave you 2,000? Every single day doesn't miss a day. Chavez comes motis. Of course, I'm going to love him. Yeah, but he's kind of nasty. He gives me $2,000. Ab gives you much more every single day. Even though maybe yesterday we took some long strides, our eyesight are still here. Digestive system, shoulders are working, knees are bending, our brain, our wife, kids, house, car, whatever a person HAS AGAINST US OR ANYTHING. IF YOU VIEW IT as a million DOLLARS EVERY SINGLE DAY, YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE HIM. A person comes to you and says, "You know, I just acquired this unbelievable sensor. It's a a love gauge. You see this guy over there? Love him in the next 30 days more so than you love him now. If you don't, I'm going to give you a million dollars. Do you think you're going to find a way to love?" So, you go over and you start talking to him. What do you do? Where you from? There's some some find something in common. And you don't you don't he's also kind of rough on the edges and he's kind of nasty. But a million dollars are waiting for you. Are you going to find a way to focus only on his good character traits? I love it. You're going to ignore everything and he's going to say he had a reason different background. You're going to convince yourself. And what if after 30 days they find that in fact you love him just a drop more. You get a million dollars. The guy comes to you and says, "Listen, you have another 30 days. If you find a way to love him a drop more, you're going to get $2 million. WILL YOU FIND A WAY? YES. Everything you have is from him and he's the one going to shower you with more than 2 million. SO IF WE THINK THAT YOU'RE GOING TO FIND LOVE TO but that's the reason I brought this a fourth way says a remarkable thing. We tend to think that giving is a product of love. When I love someone, so I give him gifts. Giving is a product of love. Comes and says, "You're wrong. Giving yields love." He says, "I'll prove it to you. This doesn't apply here, but you should know out there. Some kids sometimes don't always listen to their parents. I I know it's a you never heard of it. You should know SOME KIDS DON'T ALWAYS LISTEN TO THE PARENTS. YOU never heard of this, right? I know. And what does the parent do? He continues showering them with more and more and MORE GIFTS. WHY? What is it to you? The more you give, the more you find love. When the father stops giving, love will cease as well or it will diminish. says the look at your children look at a person who built a building arts whatever he created when you create something when you plant he discusses trees and plants he discusses buildings when you create something because you gave from yourself you find love and he says if you don't believe me try it which means if your wife said something nasty she upset you go buy your gift you want to find love give and you will find love. Giving heals love. It's not that giving is a product of love. It's the opposite. If the wife is upset and a husband, let her bake him a cake. Nobody wants to fight. Just how do we end it? How do I love him again? No problem. Give gifts and you will find love. He says, try it on people and you see that suddenly everybody becomes your relatives. You love people. That's the used to always say the root of the word love is have which means to give. You want to love someone give give. You're going to find love. Many times you see you see a g convert how they d and it's all inspiring. Wow look AT THAT FIRE. AND I'm not talking about the first week the first year they're in the business. 20 years later much more fire than a boring FFB who grew up with Davening. Where is that FIRE COMING FROM? HOW THEY HAD to maintain it? I think the answer is very simple based on this based on the what the convert and Bouva had to do is to give to sacrifice so much more than an FFB. They have to sacrifice their family ties many times, their friends, their surroundings, sometimes their jobs. The ta, the burden, the money. Suddenly in the middle of life, go spend money for a fitting. Go change your wardrobe if you're a woman. Go change all the pots and pans and all the dishes and everything. You know how much money that is? WHAT AN EXPENSE. And everybody looks at him. What happened to you? You became one of them. What a sacrifice. But since when you give you find love, the bala the convert gave on the highest level. So mim they have the highest level of love towards the more so than an who doesn't have to sacrifice. He grew up with these concepts. So I don't drive on shabas to the beach while eating shrimps. Big deal. It's not even a challenge before. It's an unbelievable challenge. It's a major sacrifice. Oh, you sacrifice. You got to find love. Good. dash the two HEARTS even if he takes your soul away even if you have to spend all your money we normally understand this to mean you should love I'll tell you how to apply it you have to be willing to sacrifice everything I think this person not only is saying what the says but is here how to find the is asking a question you want to find love I'll tell you how if you're willing TO SACRIFICE EVERYTHING YOU HAVE if you're willing TO GIVE YOUR BROTHER EVERYTHING LIKE [screaming] THAT LIKE THAT COVERED YOU WILL FIND LOVE IT'S AN INSTRUCTION IT'S A GUIDE HOW TO FIND LOVE IT'S OBVIOUSLY WHAT the gam says as well it's the application of how to love you must be willing the sacrifice, but it's also a directive. You really want to find it, I'll tell you how. Be willing to separate from everything you have. If you're willing to do that, you're going to find a very very intense love. And this theme continues. This is one later. Don't read it. IT'S A QUESTION MARK. OH, YOU'RE ASKING ME, MAN. HOW DOES HOW TO ARRIVE THERE? I'LL tell you. Keep everything that he tells you because it's going to cost you a lot of money. Put them together. Keep everything. You know how expensive that is? What a sacrifice. You have to refrain from so many things that you would like TO DO. YOU SACRIFICE INSTEAD OF YOU'RE GOING TO FIND LOVE. When you sacrifice on the highest level, you're going to find the highest level to so we just have to reprogram ourselves. We're not going through the motions and doing what they telling us. We're wanting to sacrifice everything to give everything to because we want to find love to and we will. Last thing riddle of the day. Is there a in our para that appears the whole a in our par that appears in any that appears in but the whole not one word or two words I know appears in the answer is yes says it's right after in the next paragraph Thank you.