Passover Class: The Sages Debate How to Heal from Deep Trauma

Okay, welcome everybody. Thank you for joining us. Yes. Yes. I missed the class too and it's a pleasure to be here. So, this will be our uh final class before PES. Then we will we resume after PES. So today's class is dedicated by uh Liz and Dr. Michael Michelle in the loving memory of Liz's mother, Mr. Shirley Levy. Alo hashalam sar pessel bas ar in tribute to her fourth yard site which was recently on the 22nd day of Mrs. Shirley Levy was one of the pillars of Muny, one of the pioneers who back in the early 50s together with her husband built up major parts of the Muny community and was a pillar of uh of kindness and love and and Tyra and education and uh generosity for so many here and uh we honor her memory today. May she continue to be an eternal source of light, blessing and inspiration for her family and the entire community and all of our people. Amen. Class is also dedicated by Elliot Kaplan in memory of the arts of Rabdel Bened and Rahul on the 18th day of May it continue to be an eternal source of blessing and light. Thank you very very much. So today I would like to learn with you Ezra Sashem a little piece of the Hagada. This is right before the Denu right before the section of the Denu. Now truth be told most seders when you sit down manana of Adamu that's where there's usually some people who prepared talks insights explanations and I don't know how everybody's seda runs there's different sedas there's short versions there's long versions there's people who like moving fast there's people who don't like moving fast there's people who fall asleep early on there's people who fall asleep a little later there's people who prepare too many talks and so on and so forth but as they say masle right everything needs masle this is a part of the that's close to the end and therefore many people are like when are we getting to the egg or in Hebrew it's called deno I had enough so it's a section of the hagada that's often overlooked and glossed over because it's later later in the evening and that is right after we enumerate the 10 plagues that has befallen the Egyptian oppressors and tyrants oppressing the Jewish people. So we finish the 10 plagues, pour out some wine from our cups into the bowls and then the Hagada quotes a fascinating and yet very very perplexing and enigmatic argument between three of the greatest sages. I want to read it with you inside so you could see it. If you have the it's page 550 and if you have the other sedorim it's in the rais you see he was called gali because he came from the gal. He came from northern up north. His obvious name was and he says what does he say? How do we know that the Egyptians were plagued were struck with 10 plagues? And by the sea they were struck with 50 plagues, five times the amount. How do we know this? And he answers and his answer is that the pusk says in par that the Egyptian magicians and sorcerers told parro this is a finger of God. These plagues are it's a finger of God at the sea. It says the Jewish people saw the gigantic great hand of what Hashem performed in Mitzim. So if the plagues in Egypt represented God's finger and what happened at the sea represented Hashem's hand so that's five times the amount because in each hand we have five fingers. So in Mit they said and at the Yamsu it says they saw Hashem's hand. So says obviously whatever happened at the Yamsu was five times the amount of what happened in Egypt. So if in Egypt there were 10 plagues because that's clearly says in the Torah there were 10 plagues blood and frogs and lice and uh let's see if I remember you have to remember for for the seder and the wild beasts and then the pandemic and the boils and the hail and the locust and the darkness and the firstborn Egyptian males who died. I got a 100. Okay, extra credit for the rest of the class, but that was 100. So it says clearly there were 10 makas and that's a finger. So what happened at the sea of hand? So it's five times the amount. 5 * 10 is 50 times table. So obviously says look at the last line. So the equation is simple. Well, if in Egypt they were struck with 10, at the sea they were struck with 50. Okay, you would think, okay, very nice finger, hand, very nice v, five times the amount. In others, whatever they saw in Egypt, it was quadrupled actually five times the amount in at the Yamsov. But by Jews, we need to argue a little bit. Rabelzar comes who was a colleague and he says no sorry you got it wrong. Each plague in Egypt consisted of four. So there weren't 10 plagues, there were 40 plagues. If each plague consisted of four, so 10 plagues becomes 40 cuz each one has four. So that means that the C it's not 5 * 10 it's 5 * 40. So what's 5 * 40? 200. How do you know? How do you know all this? He brings a P from Hashem sent against the Egyptians something called which is Vam anger oppression. evil angels. In other words, each plague had four dimensions. In Egypt, they were struck with 40. At the sea, they were struck with 200 cuz remember from the finger to the hand, you always got to make it five times the amount. So, says 10 50 says, "No, 40, 200." You would think we're good. No, Rebea, our great sage, the greatest of the great he says, "No, that you got the mathematics wrong. Each plague with which theam struck the Egyptians consisted of five, not four and not one, five. So 10 becomes not 40, it becomes 50. And he uses the same but he interprets it different is one two three. And how does he conclude the paragraph? Here is the conclusion. Now in Egypt they were struck with 50 plagues. How much is five times 50? It's not 50. It's not 200. It's 250. So if in Egypt they saw God's finger finger. And at the sea they saw Hashem's hand and in Egypt we know it was 50 because each plague had five aspects to it or it had five dimensions or it consisted of five parts. So at the sea it was 250. And that's the end of the argument that we repeat each year on PES in the right after this we go to denu and is usually even if somebody tries to explain this somebody else just started to sing denu because they had enough right so uh and is already beaconing you know it's like when you're reaching the destination and and it's already beaconing and the is hungry you're exhausted is hungry. So as I told you not too many pauses at this stage but uh huh first of all this is such an interesting argument. First of all like why do we have to argue about this? Thank God we're out of Egypt. I mean it happened 3,300 years ago. Even when they were arguing about this, it wasn't about an event that happened a day before. Rabbi Akbilli, Rabbi Alazar all lived in the second century after the common era in the generation right after the Sheni. The destruction of the second was in the year 70 after the common era or 69 or 68 in the secular calendar. in the Hebrew calendar was 3,828 or 29 or 30 38 28 or 29 because we're not sure exactly which year but one of those three years on tishab and that's when these people lived would ultimately be slain by the Romans a few decades later after the revolt which happened around 60 years after the destruction of the second bt. Now remember when the Jewish people left Egypt they were 40 years in the desert they went into Israel it took 440 years till Schlimmer built the Bameikdash and the first Bdish was destroyed 410 years later so the first Bikush was destroyed more than 800 years after they entered Israel and then there was another 500 years till the destruction of the second bas so you're dealing with a period of 1500 around 1500 years give or take between the stories of Mitzim and this debate it's not a debate eight that happened a day later. So what are they arguing? everything. And then there's a bigger question like there's a there's a question what was was but a bigger the clearly says there were 10 plagues like it says clearly every child who learns and every adult who learns knows there's a list not only that in the we just listed the 10 plagues the could have said there were 40 plagues could have said 50 it says 10 and that's where says there were 10 plagues even gave a sign that adash What would be the quest and the reason to search and say no there weren't 10 there were 40 and there were 50 and then automatically it results in how many plagues happen at the sea whether it was 50 at the sea or 200 at the sea or 250 at the sea now you could say well brought a from that's aim and that's Why? He says there were more plagues. It's the chapter 78. But also knew that verse into so obviously it's not the verse itself that creates the paradigm. It's a certain perspective that he then sees in this PK. Not only that, Rabzar and Rabaka bring the same PK and he interprets it as 40 and he interprets it as 50 because of the way they're they're analyzing and dissecting that PK. So there's obviously a certain inner perspective that each of them has and then they find the source of it in the PK. So the way that looks at the PK looks at are with three different prisms. What are these three different perspectives and it's important to mention this in the sedar even if there was an argument even most people would have not known about this argument if it wasn't in the Hagada. Were they part of the balaga? Huh? Were these people part of the bal? It could be. These names are very important in the Hagada because when we opened up the story of the Hagada, two of these names were mentioned already, right? Right after we says, there's a story about Rabbi Ali, Rab Yeshua, Rabbel Oazar, Rabaka. So, two of these people debating were in that story. Rabbi and Rabelzar Rabeki was not there in Benra that night. Now it could be this conversation happened that night in Benbra. Could be it was another conversation that doesn't that's not said but these two people were already familiar with and they were the ones who were telling the story of it all night until their students came and said it's morning. So this was inserted into the Hagad as part of the criy to be able to understand either the plagues in Egypt number 10 or they really numbered 40 or they really numbered 50. Now obviously don't have the authority to argue with the nobody does. So they're not arguing. They're interpreting that each plague really had four or had five. What's the point? and and what's the relevance and why is it in the so here we could see a classic example how you could read something and on a superficial level just looks like a very technical argument about numbers and frankly doesn't seem like a relevant argument in any form or fashion and let's say each plague had four dimensions okay thank you so now what each plague had five so instead of saying four times Thank you for each plague. I should say five times thank you. Is that the point? But yet when we go a step deeper, a new world opens up and we see that this debate is a very profound debate. And it's a debate that reflects their personalities, their souls, their belt on Shaolong, their experience with exile and Egyptian exile, their experience with pain and suffering and agony, and their understanding of what liberation and emancipation is. So let's with God's grace begin the journey at least part of it. What do they say? A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. Let's go a few steps. the rishim. There are many commentators on the Hagada and some of the you have the Ritva, the Ritvah, you have the Rashbats, you have Abarbanel. These are some of the famous commentators on the Hagada Avam. They say that this argument has to do with a fundamental question of how you view the plagues in Egypt. I'm going to use their language. It's a little bit of an ancient vocabulary that was very influenced by the philosophy and cosmology of the time. But then I'll try to bring it down to the best of my ability. The Medish teaches and this is very often quoted in Medish and in Zoar countless times and the Rambam discusses this and in many works of the rishim of the middle of medieval times but much before already in the Medish and in the Zar and Laavdil who was a very fundamental idea in Greek Greek philosophy and the Arisatelian understanding of the universe and the cosmos. most is that all matter is made up of four elements. When something is dissected, you can ultimately find the component of fire, the component of ru of ear, the component of mayim which is water and the component of earth. That means even fire has these four components and even water has these four components and even earth has these four components and ruach wind or ear also has these four components. This is known as the arbaidas. In the cabala and zoya and the writings of the Arizal they even correspond the four letters of hashem's name yud and he and vav and he corresponding to the four elements of aim fire ear water and earth in kabala they also correspond to the four worlds bria ba teaches there have an evolution of four worlds four states of consciousness from higher to lower onto our world which is called the world of there's the world of oneness The world of creation, the world of formation, and the world of action and separateness. Again, four worlds corresponding primarily to these four. You saw this. Each world focused predominantly on one of the four elements. Atsilus the four worlds their names is atos is the highest bria. It's four states of consciousness in which each reality evolves from one state into another state. To give a simple example for that would be if I'm looking at somebody crying. What I see are physical tears. But we all know that those physical tears are just an embodiment of what? Of an emotion. But I may not see the emotion. I may not know about the emotion. But the person crying, what do they feel for them? The emotion is far more important than the tear, right? I only see the tears and then I could trace the tear back to the emotion. I may say, "How you feeling? What are you feeling?" But for the person himself or herself, it's the feeling that is ultimately the the predominant experience. The tears are just the manifestation. So we look at a world, we see so to speak, I see rain, right? So it's like I see physical rain, but what is the emotion behind the rain? What is the energy behind the rain? What is the spiritual consciousness behind the rain? That's the higher world of rain. So that's what it means. You have four worlds. Every reality manifests itself on different levels until it assumes a physical incarnation. This is called inabulous the order of evolution. So you have a [Music] dram in the beginning of bacious speaks about a fifth level. And by the way in Hebrew we in English we have a famous word called the quint essence. You'll say the quint essence of this person or the quint essence of this book or the quintessential nature of a soul. What does quintessential mean? Anybody knows? Quint is five. Why is the essence called five? The answer is because there's four elements but then there's the fifth and the fifth is the core the formless core beneath the four elements. They call it hyic matter and that is based on the idea that before the four elements there is formless matter that's then develops into the four components of fire, air, water and earth. And then ultimately every aspect every creature and every piece particle piece of matter gets developed the way it is. So you have three dimensions. You have the core essence quint essence the fifth level that's formless matter. And then it devolves and develops into four distinct elements fire water and earth. And then everything is developed from that. Whether it's a tree or a person, whether it's an ant or a bee, whether it's a butterfly or a squirrel, whether it is a rock or a drop of water, this was their understanding. Yes, hinder. Oh, good question. Good question. Good question. How do we apply this to our modern understanding of science, physics, and chemistry? Because today if you're going to study chemistry it's not how the class will begin with the dollarus. And that's why some people have a problem with this because how does it uh how does it coincide with our understanding? That's your question right? So the truth is that these four elements that we're talking about in the ancient world were a very very popular conception of describing reality. In fact, the four elements were even used to describe four temperaments that a person can have. And there's still people who are involved in this. Are you a fire person? Are you a Are you a ruach person? That's why you go to tvasu or are you a fire person or are you a Mayan person or are you an affer person there even some models of therapy that are uh based on this and they uh they were used as four elements to describe the various parts of the body and that the temperaments and the humors were were needed to be in balance with each other for a person to be able to be well both physically and mentally. So these are the arbaidas. Now you ask about the modern application of it. So the truth is that the four elements do align with four states of matter that modern science agrees on. Matter can exist in four states. Now, I know you're not in elementary school or in high school or in uh studying now chemistry in college, but give me two minutes because I want you to understand this argument because you'll see it's quite fascinating how these tanoyam talk about this. There's four states of matter. One is called solid. One is liquid, one is gas, and one is plasma. The solid state of matter is associated with earth. The liquid state of matter is associated with mayam water. The gaz state of matter is associated with ruach air. And the plasma state of fire is associated with ash fire. Others associated the fourus with the four fundamental aspects of matter. Positive, negative, matter and antimatter. Positive, negative, matter and antimatter are the fundamental four fundamental aspects of ma matter with others also associated with theus. Now what does this mean? What am I saying? Matter is anything in the world in our world that has mass and volume and is made up of atoms. Atoms are the building blocks of matter. We look at matter with our eyes. But what are the building blocks of all matter? And the answer is atoms. Every single aspect of matter is made up of atoms. These are the smallest particles of matter. Now what happens? Atoms have to bond with each other. They have to connect with each other. And bonding occurs among atoms to create larger molecules. A molecule is a shiddok of a few or many atoms, many many atoms together. So the atoms bond to create molecules. Mass when we talk about mass. What's the mass of something? It's how much matter is in an object. Volume is how much space the object takes up. Now how atoms are arranged in an object determines whether it's a solid, a liquid, a gas, or a plasma. It's all everything is an arrangement of atoms. There's nothing that's not an arrangement of atoms. Those are the particles that make up matter. But how they're arranged that creates a different state of matter in a solid in a solid state of matter. The atoms are packed closely together in an ordered pattern and they cannot move. So they give solids a definite volume and shape. That would include a rock, a piece of wood, a piece of metal, ice. This is the solid state of matter. The atoms are packed closely together and they're not moving. In a liquid, a liquid which we're calling may, the atoms are close together, but they can still move around each other. There's some uh wiggling space, some musical chairs. This allows the liquid to take on the shape of whatever container it's placed in. You put the liquid in a cup and it takes one shape. You put in another mold, it takes on another shape. Examples of liquids include room temperature water, room temperature mercury, hot lava, modern rock. In a gas, there is more space between atoms, even more than in liquid. Now we're going to ru. So the atoms can move so freely that if the gas is not trapped in a container, what happens? The atoms will diffuse and spread throughout the atmosphere. That's the uniqueness about gas. Examples of gases are oxygen, nitrogen in the air which we breathe, helium and steam which is water vapor. That's an example of gas. Finally, we have a plasma which is ash. The atoms are spaced similarly to gas but it's different. Here there is so much energy in a plasma that the atoms actually split. Because of the energy the atoms split into smaller pieces. So plasmas are able to carry an electrical current and generate what's called in science magnetic fields. Example of plasmas include lightning, solar wind, the sun, fluorescent lights, neon signs. These are examples of plasma. So this is the concept of it's the way the atoms are arranged to create a different type of matter. So you have ice and you have a rock. You have water and you have lightning. It's all atoms but the arrangements are different. So here there's and the question is what's the predominant component? So now we'll understand the argument says there were 10 plagues says there were 40 plagues. Rabaka says there were 50 plagues. They weren't living in three different Egypts. They all saw the same reality. But there was a profound question. Which level of matter did the plagues reach? According to the 10 plagues knows that, but says, "One second, blood is not blood. Blood is made up of four elements. There's the a of blood. There's the ru of blood. There's the may of blood and there's the offer of blood. True. When I see blood, when I see water, I only see water. But if I have a microscope with microscopic instruments, we all know what looks like something on one level on a deeper level is so much more complex, so much more multi-layered. So Rebelz says each plague struck not only the outer surface of the water, but also each of the four elements in the water. So the ash of the water became blood and was contaminated. The ruach of the water, the mayam of the water, the afer of the water. So it wasn't one plague, it was four plagues. The same is true with Sarda and Kinim and Arov and De when the frogs attacked Egypt. It wasn't just the frog. The way I see it, the a of the frog, the ru of the frog, the mim of the frog, the offer of the frog. The same is true with the lies. The same is true with the wild animals. When they were bitten by the wild animals or attacked, it was a multi-layered plague which included four dimensions based on the fourus. That's view comes and says guys no it was even on the fifth level. Thei remember we spoke about the fact that everything has three layers. There's the outer layer that we see with our retina with our eyes the way our brain processes reality. When I look at something, I don't see Adams. I'm sorry. I see a cup. I see coffee. I see a computer. I see people. We don't look at each other and say, "Hey, wow. I Wow, you're I see your atoms." We don't do that. If we had microscopic eyes, nobody would see what we're seeing now. And the truth is that's the world we live in. We live in that external world, right? I was once giving a class how important it is for people to be self-aware and work out their inner emotions. So somebody said so why does Judaism focus so much on behavior and not equally we should talk about our internal selves. I said that's true but you also have to understand that ultimately the person is behavior. They said why the ponyus matters. So I so I'll give you an example. I once read this from a professor. It was a brilliant example. He said nobody when they want to put a picture you want to put a pictures of your children in the dining room or pictures of your parents or your grandparents. He said really what we should do is we should go to a dentist of your teeth of your child's teeth or an x-ray of other parts of his body and that's what you should hang up in the dining room cuz that's the truth about your child. But I never saw a dining room or living room with the X-rays of the teeth. Even though that's the pimus and the answer is because the person is the person because ultimately what I look like defines who I am and it's an important idea. It says in the end. So I have to work on myself internally. Absolutely. But ultimately the person becomes how they live on a day-to-day life. So that's the outer layer of existence. But then there's an inner layer. The inner layer is all matter is made up of these four elements. And then there's the deeper layer, the fifth, the quintessence. Which level did the makus hit? Which level? Lily says the outer level. Rebel says the inner level. Rab says the innermost level. Even the fifth. So every maka consisted of five, not a four, a five. It it went to the formless core of matter. Wasn't just a matter. Huh? It wasn't just a matter. Yeah. Yeah. It wasn't just the water on an outer sur the outer surface of water became blood. the water was affected and contaminated to the deepest core. That's and therefore they have these different paradigms what happened in Mits. If we want to apply this using a little bit of uh our vocabulary of 2023 I'm just using the language of the rishim and just using different words. We could say this when I'm looking at a table I see a table. If I had microscopes, I could see the atomic substructure. Substructure. Thank you. That was the word. Substructure. And it's incredible. In a droplet of water, how many atoms are there? It's beyond what we can imagine. You're talking about sectillions. You know what sectillion is? How many zeros? Unfathomable mathematics. Unfathomable. How many atoms are in a droplet of water in in a needle in in the in in the edge of a needle and it's organized? Because if it's not organized in a certain way, matter could never be what it is. Not a single cell of ours can function. Nothing in the world could function. That's the miracle of existence. Sometimes sometimes people wonder the the the the maral says the reason Pes is called a seder. Why is it called a seder? Did you ever see a seder that had seder? Come on, let's be honest. Let's be honest. I I'm still looking for that seder, right? There's always somebody who makes a comment or does something right in the beginning that derails us. Whether my wine spilled on my matzah, they broke the matzah, they did this. Especially if you're careful with gibr. OMG. If you're lucky enough to come from stock and you come from a house that if a fork falls on the floor, do you remember what happens when a fork falls on the floor? The option is cardiac arrest or suicide. Just joking. Just joking. Just joking. [Laughter] That's called seder. So the maral says something beautiful. He says the whole seder is there to teach you that there is an inner seder in life. There's an inner rhythm. Inner rhythm doesn't mean it always looks that way. Sometimes it looks very chaotic, but there's an inner rhythm that does not always that's not always captured by the external eye. But it's hard for a person to believe this. Sometimes people look at their lives and like sorry there's no sad here. But the truth is when you look at every other part of the world, it's incredible because there's not a single reality that can function. There's not a single element and component of life that can exist without insan I'm using the word insane insane order. It's not just order what we call an orderly person. You're talking about the tiniest droplet of rain flake of snow grain of sand cell organism functions with such intricate and precision. say that if one detail and nuance was out of order, everything would fall apart. The finetuning of it is simply mind staggering. Somebody came to see me, a teenager. He's struggling a little bit. So he said, "You seem like an intelligent person." I said, "Thank you for the compliment. Tell my mother-in-law." He says, "How could you be a believer like with you know a little like you read looks like you read a little science like why are you not an atheist?" So I told him, I'll be very honest with you. I don't have enough blind faith to be an atheist. Today we know so much about the insane structure of the universe that to believe that there was no intelligence behind it, you have to have a lot of ammuna. I said, I don't have so much amuda. What should I tell you? I'm being honest with you. You have a lot of ammuna to say it's all random. I get it. I just don't have. I said, maybe teach me faith and maybe one day I'll be able to become an atheist. So when you see when you see that in every aspect of the planet in the universe there's so much seder when there's one aspect and you say but here there's a deta where there's no seder obviously an intelligent person understands that there may be a seder but one that doesn't meet the eye so when I look at the universe when I look at matter I don't see atoms if we would see atoms life would be very very different I don't even see what x-rays show till 150 years ago or 120 years ago, there was no concept of an X-ray. Which year did they invent the X-ray? You didn't learn that in medical school? You did, but you forgot. Okay, I won't tell them. [Music] We didn't know. We didn't know that there's such a thing called germs. We didn't know there's something called fungi. We didn't know there's something called viruses. We didn't know what an infection is. During the black plague, they blamed the Jews for poisoning all the wells and the devil and the Jews for poisoning the wells. Right? These are new mamish new developments. It's crazy. It's all new develop. Why? Because we only saw the external layer of things. That's one level. Then you could look at something and see the substructure. The substructure is atomic. And when you see the substructure, you see it could be a solid state, a gazous state, a plasma state. What was the other one? Liquid state. But one second. The word atom means indivisible. Is an atom indivisible? No. There's something called subatomic part. They used to think an atom that's it. You can't get more. There's no substructure. Today we know there's what's called subatomic particles. Each atom is made up of different aspects. So you're talking about this sub substructure. And the question is how far does that go? may be go it may go beyond what anybody believes. sub substructure. The atom itself is not indiv. The atom itself has so to speak quarks, different parts, what we call the nucleus of the atom. The electrons revolving around the nucleus. And 99.9% of an atom is empty space. Which means, and this is a statement of science, not of religion, listen to this. The entire matter, real matter, real gashmies of our planet can fit into a carry-on suitcase. Did you hear what I said? The entire gashmas of our planet fits into a carry-on suitcase. Pure science. Because everything is made up of atom and 99.9% of an atom is empty space. Because of the arrangement of the atom, it becomes a solid in our touch and our perspective. And 99% of Adam is empty space. That's the hashem, the divine energy which sustains it. So now let's go back to it. So when I'm looking at the world are talking about the same reality but three different pairs of glasses says I see water water is water is water is water. They say that Freud once said sometimes a cigar is only a cigar. We don't have to sit in therapy and analyze what's the cigar, why are you having the cigar? What happened in your childhood that made you like cigars? Sometimes a cigar is only a cigar. Says sometimes water is only water. Don't get complicated on me. Rebel says one second. What about the atomic structure? There's a substructure to water. There's a substructure to every mammal and bird and shrub and bush to every mineral to all of vegetation to everything. Every part every particle of matter is made up of atomic atoms. But one second so you have to go deeper. Every plague got four comes and says you forgot about subatomic particles. You forgot about the core of reality even beyond the atom. There's something at the core of the atom that ultimately what makes an atom is something even more fundamental. And this is where physics goes into a world of insanity. They call it quantum physic, quantum mechanics, where they can't even talk about rationality anymore. Subatomic particles move around clockwise and counterclockwise simultaneously. Imagine you see a ball spinning in this direction and the same ball is spinning in that direction. And that is pure science. Today, Stephen Hawkins said, "If you talk to me about quantum physics, I open my drawer to take out my gun. A cat can be dead and alive." Schwinger's cat. It's it's it's it's fascinating. It doesn't even have a fixed place says the Maka went all the way there. The fifth level, which is formless between the three of them. This was the argument. How deep? Now you'll ask, okay, very interesting. What's the relevance? They left Egypt. I always thought one came after the next. One said the next. No, no, no. It was debate. But in Yiddish, debates are just different truths. They're not real debates. That's why they don't hate each other after the debates. You understand? The Gmorra says, "What does it mean? What did God say? Is this the word of God? Is this the word of God?" The answer is everyone is defining a truth, a different aspect of truth. So it's an argument, but it's not really an argument. That's what really real arguments are that way. [Music] Is that part of the It could be. So now let's go to the world of and there's an unbelievable argument about how you have to destroy and suddenly you see the relationships between the world of science and physics world of history of the makus and the world of what do you do with your pes we know there's three about one is you're not allowed to eat it that's fine no eating but a lot of things you're not allowed to eat but with there's a special is you're not allowed to benefit from it if I I have on pes and I want to feed my dog or I want to feed my chickens or I want to feed my sheep. I'm not allowed to. If I want to gift to my my neighbor who's non-Jewish on Pes, I could do it before Pes, but on Pes I'm not allowed to have a benefit from even if I'm not eating it. You have other foods that are I'm allowed to benefit from it. I could sell it. I can gift it. I can give it to my animal. My dog doesn't have to eat kosher unless you have a very firm dog. had a behemoth wouldn't eat had a donkey wouldn't eat untithed food. That's his dunkey was sensitive. He his dunkey knew who his master was. But on butt did the third prohibition. I'm not let even have it. I'm not let even have that's very unique. this tray for food you're allowed to own tray for food mostly food you could sell you're not allowed to eat you're not allowed to benefit from but I'm not allowed even own it have it on pes it's called and that's why there's a mitzvah to destroy of course if I give it away before pes to somebody else or I sell somebody else then I don't have it but to have we know is prohibited by now here's a fascinating thing most people know says that is mutah No was one opinion who held that you're allowed to benefit from that's what the Gmorra says it's not the but that was his huh because he says means you're not allowed to eat and he has his proofs not only you're allowed to sell it you're allowed to gift it you're allowed to give it to your animal much more than having it clearly says you shouldn't have in your house because you may come to eat it. But in terms of I'm allowed to have it's a it's not the it wasn't accepted by the other sage but this was his you were allowed to work on your wheat field according to him. Yeah. You're allowed to work with it because you're allowed to benefit from it and you'reow. Yeah. It still says he says you shouldn't have it because that's because most say because you're going to come to eat it. That's the issue. But you lot of benefit from it on PES that's now what about destroying how do we destroy there's a huge argument how do we destroy in the Mishna you have to burn it disagree they say you don't have to burn it you can turn it into take bread and uh maf means you uh crumb it crumb it You throw it into the wind. You take the little crumbs, you put it into the sea. What's the argument? One of you have to burn it because you have to destroy it completely. The other view and that's the the say you don't have to destroy it completely. You just have to remove the ability to eat it or sell it. Now, if there's a crumb in the sea, nobody's going to go to the ocean and find a crumb and sell it. It's worthless. So for all practical purposes it's gone. Who holds that you have to burnt the including hold you don't have to burn it you have to crumble it and make it inedible and unusable. So now see the parallel says you have to burnt Relis says you have to get rid of it and you can't have an off from it but you don't have to burn it. says you're allowed to benefit from when you talk about the three layers of something. What can I eat? I can't eat Adams. Does anybody eat Adams? Of course, we eat Adams, but we're not eating Adams. You're eating a pizza. You're eating kale. Let's go with the kale. You're eating Adams. But if anybody tells you, "What are you serving at the Bitzvah?" Adams. And you know what? It's cheaper than the caterer. It's true. But then you can also give tissue boxes for them to eat. Tissue bags are also made up of atoms. It's not going to work. There's a deeper level that has atoms. But you got to serve food. It's called food. Whether you're a vegan or a vegetarian or uh whatever we're eating food because food relates to the external layer of things says remember what's represents the kipa of mitim the negativity of mitz according to the negativity of mitzim penetrated the surface not deeper. So what are you prohibited with on pes the surface the outside don't eat it benefit applies to the totality of something you enjoy the a and the and the and the butil you can only eat the outer lays I can't I don't eat I don't I don't eat fire and ear and water and earth even though it's inside but that's a deeper layer of reality so says is mut because the prohibition against parallels how deep was the kipo was the toxicity of mitzim according to him it penetrated the surface and represents the Egyptian negativity that we want to get rid of we want to leave so says it's fine you could benefit from that layer of thet was not contaminated the layer oft that you're enjoying not eating that's fine it's mut [Music] Rabbi Eleazar says, "You're not let benefits because even the substructure of the KTS has been contaminated. You're not let benefit of that. But do you have to burn it?" You don't have to burn it. You could crumble it, throw it into the sea. You know why? It's not edible and it's not usable. You don't have to burn it. A says, "No. So the says says all the burning. What does burning do? Burning destroys it completely. The ashes is not a continuum of the previous matter. Burning finishes it. That's the difference between planting and burning. Why is Judaism so against cremation? When we bury a corpse, we're not destroying it. In fact, all of the nutrients, all of the the parts of the body become part of the earth. Any fossil even of an animal that dies, it becomes part of the earth's nutrients. It doesn't die. It lives on in a different form. Cremation is different. Cremation is different. That's why it's so important. The body should offer says in that burial is a form of planting. When you plant a seed, you're not destroying the seed. It's going through a transformation. The resurrection of the dead is the growth of the body after the planting. But when you destroy, there's an expression in when you destroy something, it's like a new reality. It's a new face. You don't look at the ashes and you say, "Oh, wow. This was nice." You don't see anything. Soaka says, Rabbi Aaka says the needs to be destroyed at its core. You know why? Because the plagues went into the fifth level. So the quint essence thei so the comet it's penetrated the core of Egypt. So when we get rid of Egypt, what do you have to get rid of? The core, not just the outer structure, not just the inner structure, but the innermost structure, the quintessence. The best we can do in the world is burn something. We don't have another way of of uh of eliminating that. So the about by the sages reflect their argument in the Hagada. But now let's take it to the world of the nishama, to the world of the soul, to the world of emotions. What is really the argument? This is a very very deep argument and that is how deep could mitim reach into a person. The word mitsim comes from the word msarim. We spoke many times mitsarim means confinements constrain. When a person is trained in shackles it's mitim. The word mits is from the word sar distressed. Torah is the same word mates are boundaries, borders. Borders are good. But when my soul is confined in narrow borders, I can't flex my spiritual, emotional, physical muscles. It's a form of slavery. That's what slavery is. That's what authent. [Music] And then there is emotional slavery, emotional servitude, psychological servitude, spiritual servitude. I may be a slave to a self-image that is so distressful and debilitating. How deep can Mitsim penetrate a person? How deep can it penetrate a culture? How destructive can it be? They argued about this and it's a profound argument and it's not really an argument. Everybody spoke about their experience. Rabio Lily had one life. Rabelza had another life. Raba had a third life. Who was Rabos Lily? What we know about Lily is that he was as pure as it gets. He was as innocent as it gets. Hagilli Kazal say was the paradigm of innocence. Huh? I want to say the story about his wife. It's not a comfortable story, but it's it's quite a story. It's quite a story. But his piety was of a different level. He just saw the world differently. There's a Gabi chapter 11 and it's quoted also in Medish and a few places. Unfortunately, you'll forgive me was married to a very very very difficult person. There's a word that your grandmother would use for these types of people. You know the word your grandmother would use Yes. How did I know your grandmother used it? Cuz your grandmother wasn't the only one. Let's put it that way. Okay. She was a very Let's put it mildly. She was a very And in Yiddish they say, how do you say that in English? There's no word for it in English cuz you can't deay somebody the yin in English like you do it in Yiddish, right? Dear means she drove the poor guy mad. She was just very very difficult or as they would say in today's English, she had a lot a lot a lot of issues that were unresolved and she was not ready to look in the mirror. So her husband was blamed for everything. Now, one of the deepest and truest rules in life is when I have a challenge, the best thing I can do is look inward. This doesn't mean the person near me doesn't have challenges, but it does mean that so often I can literally throw my challenges on the other person and blame them for my misery when essentially my brokenness is coming from inside. And that's why the greatest blessing is the self-awareness which is sometimes not easy because my subconscious may not reveal to me what is going on and I may have repressed it very long ago because I couldn't survive. This is why we need compassion but we need a lot of honesty to be cou and be courageous. So the gammor says she was just so difficult and it he was choking. One day he was visited by Rabi Rabbaza Benazaria who was also in the story in Benabra one of the great sages and was a student of Rabio and he saw what's happening and he said Rebba maybe it's time for uh time to get divorced such abuse like like such abuse he told him he said he said the way you're being desecrated the way he told her it's the Hey, you're being violated and compromised. It's not fair to you. It's not fair to us to watch. The Gmorra doesn't say what she did, but you can imagine. You can imagine it wasn't just that Cholan got burnt. Let's put it that way. You know what he said? Rabi was a very very poor man. He says when I married her, she made sure that the kuva is huge. Meaning the amount of money I have to pay if I get divorced is an astronomical amount of money. I push don't have it. I don't have it. It's a huge kuva. And hically, you have to pay her. I got to pay her the money. That's my huh what was the [Music] Listen to this. Asiah was a very rich man. Asiah. Everybody's having a good time. Okay. I thought, how am I going to tell this story at a woman's class, you know, but I see you're all having a wonderful time. Bar Hashem, I underestimated you. Okay. So, was a very rich man. He was willing to lend you the money, not lend. He said, "Reb." He gave the money gave her a get and he gave her and it was and there was and was separated from her. They were divorced. She went and found a new man who the shimmer of the city. There was a security guard of the city. This is what he did. He was a lonely man and she she got him. She was a rich lady at the time. Now she was a very rich lady, right? And if he hired himself, he was a security guard 24 hours or whatever the amount of time he was. Yeah. I don't know what that looked like, but maybe she didn't need a kua anymore cuz she got her first kuva. She married him. And the garra says that he became so miserable. He became so miserable. He lost his eyesight. And he he made crazy decisions in business and he all the assets she gave. He lost everything. He was a poor man and he was blind and they push didn't have money to live because she gave him the money to invest or to work with and he went so crazy from her he lost it and he lost his eyesight and they would go around to beg together but people knew who she was and what she did to what she do. So they they were dismissive of her. The Gomorrah says nobody gave them anything. So he turned to her and he says you know I moved here because of you. Is there anybody in this neighborhood who can who has a good heart? So she says there's a neighborhood of Rabio Hagilli and over there there are unbelievable people but he divorced me so I can't go there. We we can't really go there. So this guy got so upset the Gmorra says he he uh he gave her a slap. He slapped her. Aguili was walking by and he heard groaning and he takes a look and he sees that his ex is in a difficult position and they both look disgraceful and they're sleing around like schnars and nobody is helping them. So the garra says took both of them and he had a house and he gave them the house and he gave them to live and for the rest of their life he supported them. He was no rich man. He couldn't even pay. supported them both of them till the rest of their life. So that don't be don't close your eyes from your flesh. Even though she was part of his flesh, he never ever ever forgot about her in there. Now what does this tell you about? It tells you something, right? Yeah. So this where basically speaks about people being contaminated, toxic, negative. He says, "Yeah, it can affect the surface." Even his ex. And you would think any therapist would say boundaries for good reason. For good reason. I agree. But basically was just he was made of a different thing. So you might say he was naive. He was he was being exploited. But that's not what the Gmorra is saying. He wasn't being exploited. when he had money for the he divorced her. If he was being exploited, he would stay married. He wasn't a victim of endless abuse. He didn't have the money. He got the money, he divorced her. But nonetheless, his heart was so big, his compassion was so deep, his empathy was so deep. He probably looked at them and he had ramonas. It's like, wow, this is what people are like. You know what? Best I can do. I'll give them some food and maybe one day they'll find healing. So when literally speaks about the mockus of mitz and the of he says the substructure is pure. Now you come to rabelzar rebel wasn't like was a nsi. He was the nsi. Rebel wasn't I'm sorry. Rebel wasn't a nsi. Rebel was a nsi. Rebelzar was a b shami. Rebelzar had midas hagura. Rebel Eleazar understood the Gmorist says the name Eleazar comes from the Buzz Eli Ezri [Music] Elzar Ali Azar. Is this Yeah. Horinus bin Horinus. His father was one of the wealthiest. Huh? Why doesn't it say his father's name? It also doesn't say Rakiv's father's name. Doesn't always say a father name. usually just says the first name in the beginning also it say doesn't usually say sometimes it says a father's name and there's a reason for it when it says a father's namezer came from tremendous Jewish lineage benhkinus's father Herkinus was considered one of the greatest wealthy Jews and philanthropists of the generation whether it was Tyra whether it was Gdullah ultimately ultimately he was extremely wealthy came from a very very wealthy prominent family. There's a whole story how binus went to learn how he went there. It's a whole Ma but the Belzar he came from Jews. So the bazar saw the world in a more complex way and the bazar said the could penetrate deeper. The could go much deeper therefore is user. Why? Because the kipa of mitzim went into all four levels, the ash and the ruach and the mayim and the offer. And when we say it went in to the and the ruach and the mayim and the it means that it can affect a person not only on the surface level. My atomic arrangements can be affected. The fire in me, the water in me, the ear in me, the earth in me. Isak literally allowed his ex to live in his house rentree. Shalom once said, you know, when I carry resentment in my brain, he says, why are you allowing your enemy to live in your brain rentree? At least charge them rent. But it's not so easy to get it out of my brain. Takes a lot of avoid. I can't just snap my fingers. It's out of my brain. So rebel says dysfunction, abuse, negativity can penetrate into our internal composition and that's why and that's why the makas were 40 not 10. Sometimes I can be messed up and I can mess up others in a very deep place. Healing can't only deal with the external. Yes, healing has to affect the external, but healing has to deal with deeper issues and we live we all understand when we only focus on the external and say just do the right thing, smile, pinch your cheeks and say you're happy. Maybe it works for some people, maybe it works for a limited amount of time, but if there's real brokenness inside of me, it's going to resurface and it's going to come back to bite me. We have to deal with the four elements of our personality. the fire, the water, the air, and the earth. What does that mean? Fire represents anger, rage, fury, [Music] do I go into rampages? How hot-headed am I am? Do I holler and scream in my home, in my office? Do I lose myself? Does my element of fire need healing? That's the is water represents tanuk, pleasure. There's a unique sensation of pleasure when we're in the presence of water. Maya makes grow all the pleasures. Am I a pleasure freak? Do I know how to practice self-control? What are my addictions? Do I respect myself in the sense that the pleasures I engage in are ones that are meaningful and healthy and productive? Can I be focused, responsible, restrained? Do I have that self-respect, those boundaries? If not my element of water requires healing. Ear represents emptiness. You know you say an eerie person. It lacks substance. It says hulus. Hulus is frivolousness, mockery, cynicism, empty boasting, idol talk, meaningless talk. This is all ruach. Empty ear. hoodiness, arrogance, that's h that's fire. That's like part of anger. You disagreed with me. I can't be vulnerable. But ru is like this empty arrogance. This this fake hoiness. I have no substance. I always need validation from everybody. And the conversations I get involved are just there. They contaminate the soul. And then there's aur is heaviness. Heaviness. The power of gravity. the earth filth earth it's depression sadness melancholy am I pessimistic am I gloomy am I despering am I always miserable and unhappy and when other people are happy then I have to confront my element of earth now these are not always conscious things that I could say okay this is what I'm dealing with and I know why sometimes the cause of it can be very deep and says you have to go to the dalitis you have to go to the substructure you have to see how your atoms are arranged So therefore each one of the plagues consisted of four and together it made 40 plagues not 10 plagues then comes. Baka came from a whole different world. Rakiva was a grandson of Cisra. The Gomorrah says in Sanhedrin Mibonov Shisra Luab Cisra was the archeneemy of the Jewish people. If you remember the story in the book of the whole story with Yael, how Cisra came to attack the Jews and Dra led the campaign and Cisra ran away and went to the tent of Yael. He thought she's his friend. She gave him to drink and she gave him milk and he fell asleep. He fell asleep. He fell asleep. Sorry. Thank you. Huh? The Gammorra says that in order for Yael to do what she did, she was intimate with Cisra seven times that night. That's why he was so he was a mighty muscular man. He was so exhausted and he fell asleep. If you read theim says there were seven intimacy says this was an she did to save the Jewish people. She had intimacy with Cisra and the Magala Mukas teaches that from that relationship came Rabaka and that's where Rabbaka had a different level of sensitivity. Rabaka had to deal with very deep stuff. Baka says, "I'll tell you something. Mitam can penetrate the core. Mitam can penetrate the DNA. Not just the substructure, but the sub substructure. Not just the four, but even the fifth. Rabaka says trauma can hit the deepest layers of self." The word comes from the word avo struggling with the heels with the lowest places of reality the lowest stratas of reality and holding on to asa came from that world was a grandson of sisterha was a bengadim his parents were converts to Judaism wasn't true yael ya wasn't it's not so paret Oh, could be Sha. Sorry, we have to research that. Okay, I have to look. Was a real activist. No, no, but Rabbi Yaka's par but ultimately remember you're talking about many many years in between. It's just the seed passed down cuz sister was killed. But ultimately's parents had to convert to Judaism. Some say himself converted to Judaism. And that's why you'll see something interesting in says Every person is beloved. They were created in Hashem's image. Then he says Jews have a love because they're children of Hashem. And then he says because they have the Tyra. Why does Ryaka say this? Cuz he went through all three levels. Rabbi knew what it means to be an Adam not a Jew. And he says you're Malikim. Rabaka knew what it means to be a Jew with Ala 40 years. He didn't know olive base. And a told his students later when I used to be an amates I saw and I said give me and I'll bite him like a donkey. That's how much I hated them. That's what he says. So says why didn't he tell his students I'll bite them like a dog. You know what the answers bite and don't break bones. Donkeys bite and break bones. The word forets bone means essence core quintessence said I know that the could be broken I could break the core the essence that's how deep brokenness can go in because sometimes and we know this today and this is very very difficult and sad to say but I say this because of the people who think that nobody understands but it's important to know that there is some understanding of this and it's becoming better and better. Some children who were physically emotionally abused, especially molested or raped for shalom at young a young age, especially at a very young age, often as Dr. Bessel Vanderulk once told me personally in an interview, I said, "What happens if you're if you're touched or even worse than touched before you developed an identity? You're three, you're four, you're five. He says then it's not I have trauma. Then it's I am trauma. And I want you to understand the difference. I have trauma means there is some eye that has value, but it's dealing with something painful. I am trauma means there's no eye. My atoms are organized from trauma. My core nucleus is broken at its core. Now when this person becomes completely dysfunctional as an adult or disassociates emotionally or detaches emotionally can't be in a relationship we often blame them and say what's wrong with you to say what's wrong with you I have to believe there's a you what's wrong with you you know better you are better what if there's no you what's wrong with you is a beautiful question what's wrong with you you're such a good person what's wrong with you. It's a beautiful question if there's a you. If there's no you, it's an abusive question. The question needs to be not what's wrong with you. What happened to you? Let's go find take my hand. We're going to go together and find the you. I want to find the you pre the abuse. Because that you, that you is whole. But in order to do that, I have to know how deep the brokenness can reach. Rabaka understood this. Ribaka was the quintessential person who knew how deep the kipa of mitzim can penetrate and therefore transform it. And that's why Rabaka is the greatest optimist in Jewish history. Why? Because nothing can deter him because he saw it all. Some people they live in a more innocent world and when they see the darkness like I'm done. Rabbi Aaka worked it all through. Rabbi Aka had to learn to see God in the abyss. So when Rebaka saw a fox coming out of Kadeshim, everybody was crying and he said the field was destroyed. It's plowed. But when a field is plowed it can it's the beginning of growth is the beginning of is the one whose body was penetrated by Roman combs and he could still believe in aus spiritually. What does that mean? Some people went through that level of emotional or physical torture or intimate torture to the point that combs of iron scraped away on their identity. What's left? Riaka worked that through. went into that place and he can come out saying somehow could go down to the lowest [Music] and emerge. That's why the whole and loses 24,000 students. Most people in such a situation would give up at Kan but not how it's hard to understand. It's not logical but was in touch with a level of mitz that was unprecedented and that's why come back to the beginning of the and you'll see how the whole is connected. How does begin here? We come to the last point that came to Benabra. Who was the Rev of Benabra? Rabbi Aaka. Rakiva was the R of Benra. They all came to Benabra. One second. Rabza was a Reb. A student goes to a Reb. I never heard Pes calls the Reb say come hang out of my you go to the Reb on Yam. That's what do that's what students do. You go to the Reb. He don't slept the Reb to you. Rebel was in Lud. should have gone to Lud Yeshua was his rebel. Some were his friends. The Reb came to the students especially Rebel was his rebu he's coming to to to Ben. Not only that the Gomorrah says in Rebel said I like lazy people on you know why they don't go to the stay with their wives. That's what he says. did not believe you leave the house on. That's what he says. I like lazy people. I like the men who love their couches. So they stay home did not believe you should leave home on. Hey, why'd you run away from your wife and go to Ben? Huh? But he says, "No, I want you to stay home." He says it clearly. Do not leave. Huh? Thank you. I'm so sorry. What happened? The answer is the answer is this was after the this writes in his this was after the and the Jewish people were desparing. There was no hope. The Romans destroyed everything. And the question is, how are we going to celebrate Pes? No BS mikdash, no carbon pes, no light, no hope. Everything was destroyed. Can we still leave Egypt spiritually speaking? And they all knew the answer. We're going to have to go to Rabaka for this. You have to go to Ryaka. They went to Ryaka. Rabbi Aka is the one who will be able to teach them and show them how to go out of Egypt in the midst of such darkness. Why Rabbi Aka and we get close to the Hagada? The Hagad explains Rabaka is the one who understood that the redemption of Egypt is not just a redemption from a surface evil. It's not even a redemption of a substructure evil. It's the ability to redeem yourself of that which went in to the subconscious and maybe to the sub subconscious maybe to the sub subatomic particle spiritually speaking the fifth level the I know how to break bones I know how to break the you look at yourself there's no core there's no core it's not just my fire my water my ear my earth my might have been destroyed and that's how when you get rid oft says burn thet. You have to burn the don't turn it into crumbs. You know why? That's not going to be enough. It's not going to be enough. The didn't just go into the nice fancy kala. It's in that crumb. It's in the crumb in that little little meaningless crumb. It still hasn't. It went into very deep places. That's why I'm broken. That's why I can't function. That's the endless anxiety or sense of complete despair or fear that's so overwhelming and debilitating for this poor person who didn't even choose it and has been blaming themselves their whole life for something they did not choose. It happened to them because it was so painful their conscious suppressed it or repressed it to the point they don't even have a memory of it. Says, "I'm not going to say what happened to you. I'm not going to say what's wrong with you. I'm going to ask you what happened to you. And we're going to go into the fifth level. And I know the fifth level has makas. It went into the fifth. I know the went into the core. But comes Pesa. We can have on the fifth level. That's his That's the Rebea. Now it's easy. I just have to say this as a disclaimer as I talk about it. The worst thing about trauma is to talk about it. What do I mean? I don't mean it literally. I mean it makes believe that words capture it. But this is not about words. Cuz if it would be about words, it wouldn't penetrate so deeply. This is a preverbal experience. So it's deeper than words. So as we talk about it, I have to say this that the words never capture the truth of it because it's much huh I spoke to my mother whose daughter was horrifically abused at age five. The child's 18 now. I just spoke to her last week. She said she went back to five. She's laying on the floor making animal noises. It's literally a physical thing. Yeah. This little girl who was abused at five, now she's 18, but she makes animal noises. She's going back to that moment. It's preverbal. So it's important to understand what we're talking here is an energetic experiential level which begins with a lot of compassion and empathy and a search for healing on this level. This is Rabaka's perspective. Rabio 10 raka 50 is a the question of how deep penetrates but also a question of how deep the gula is in every person's life. Thank you. And have a and a beautiful. Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Yes. Yes. That was Raul. So many different things. Yes. Who he is didn't know who he was. Yeah. Yes. That's why when Rabbi Aka came home with his 24,000 students, he says, "Shaliv, it's all hers." Because understood that the person who believed in him when he didn't believe in himself was his wife. It's extremely moving how the beginning of the Hagada, the end of the Hagada, right before Denu, how the two come together. That's why they all went to Rebea. I think this was one of the best. Thank you. Fantastic. Thank you. That's a compliment from a writer. Thank you. Not just a writer, a brilliant, brilliant woman. I work for I talk to parents. I do I support my house and they describe children going back. Yes. Videos of this kid acting like screaming, yelling. It can't be normal. Yes. They hold on to things that are unbelievable. And people who don't understand this make terrible mistakes. They blame them and they say, you know, snap out of it. They think they're not. Could you ever heal such a person? You could heal. Today Today there's Today there's models of healing. Today there's models of healing. Today there's models of healing. But it's not simple. It's very very sensitive. Yes. First of all, thank you. That was very beautiful. Thank you. Thank you for being here. I did have a quick question. Yes. Um this whole concept of like quantum physics chemical spirituality I like it. It's very not much not much but quantum quantum physics quantum physics is the portal of physics into cabala. People write some sometimes here and there. I don't know. You have to research a little. I don't know. No. Yes. Hindi. You'll explain. You'll explain to your mother about what quant quantum physics is. Physics. Okay. I was she's going to teach me tonight by dinner. Explain your father and mother. Yeah. You mentioned about feeding animals, right? is not human consumption on pes. Yeah. Oh. Oh, if it's not edible. Yeah, that's fine. Yeah. Oh, you're welcome. Thank you. Oh, I didn't know. I I meant that's edible. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There are people who are stringent with uh noted ediblets as well. But yeah, the basic prohibition is edible. My son is she can't she can't man vain we have to write kenos but her whole body is falling apart her has nothing she just wow she was abused before she knew who she was she was abused that one of the most speech no it's it's very powerful that's what Bessel vandok told me there's a pik to by year didn't believe he could be a prophet and hashem told him, "I knew you, I loved you, and I connected to you before you were formed in your mom's womb." That line is the remedy to the ultimate trauma. Before she knew herself, what' you say? Before she she knew who she was. Before she knew who she was, she lost her sense of being. So she and we all need to go back to the place of before before she knew who she was where Hashem knew who she was. And that's where her power is going to come from. And then it's infinite because it comes from before before she knew who she was. And that's the fifth level is such a powerful example to somebody like that. Yes. Wasn't abused. No. We don't know. Okay. All right. It's not about ab it's not the word abuse about the word abuse. It's about the fact the exper the experience of where you are came from Cisra. So there was things he had to deal with and contend with in his core that were very very very heavy. There's a darkness there. The reason why but the Rambam says that a G is greater than a Jew because he wrote to he says all of us trace our lineage to and you trace your lineage directly to Misha Omar directly to Hashem. What does that mean psychologically? Sometimes I could trace back my sense of self to human greatness, healthy parents, healthy grandparents which is amazing. A person like has to trace back his greatness to God himself. So you're recreating yourself in the ultimate source and then you your power is infinite because it's not limited by human greatness. But to go through that is not simple. Not simple. It's not simple. Whatever it is. Yeah. Yeah. So no perhaps yeah sometimes learn from this is that says it says in Tanya chapter 2 that sometimes a tremendous nishama comes down as a child of very lowly people. Imagine you can have parents who unfortunately are are are morally messed up and they do bad things to the child but the soul of the child is pure and the geneim he goes through or she goes through is excruciating but as he or she goes through it and comes in on the other side they encounter a greatness that's unparalleled essentially that's the seed of Messiah which comes from light and his daughters Roose and Moyov and Yehuda and Tamar and all these relationships that are very questionable because essentially the seed is coming down through a lot of trauma and yet and yet when he or she finds that the light is is is beyond because of the darkness. My daughter. Yeah. Oh, it's always that way. Yeah. My priest has told me this is the only ones that come. Yeah. Yeah. That's how it is. The most sensitive and the most spiritual, the most holy. Thank you very much. Going to have to create a new consciousness of healing. A new consciousness of healing. This wasn't my daughter. This is my friend. But I think your friend's daughter, too. Your friend's daughter, too.