Part 37: Happiness is a Decision, Not an Emotion

okay our learning is dedicated as it is each week to sh I believe was yesterday should have alah and we're always very grateful to our generous Anonymous sponsors who do so much anonymously for our community uh for the this year and for our amuna WhatsApp group if anyone is not on the amuna WhatsApp group and wants to join it please uh let me know afterwards I'm happy to get you on okay we're on o z we're in the Shalom t still going through the insights into you see it it's on page Z and I want to invite you if if you have questions or push back or challenges or more clarifications I prefer this to not be a monologue so feel free to interrupt and offer and share whatever you like at any moment the Great he added one more holy insight into this concept of faith ofo that what happens when you don't feel amuna life has dealt you some difficult cards or it's not that you're going through a challenge but just you're not really tuned in you know we have highs and lows there are rhythms of Life seasons of life and just like uh there are seasons of the world there are seasons in our own own personal lives and we go through periods where we feel hashem's intense presence and we respond with gratitude and with a sense of dependence on him and there are periods of life where we just feel not connected spiritually and we're struggling spiritually so what happens when it's a great way of putting it even when you don't feel auna in your heart you have to know that you have a in your blood that our forefathers our ancestors bequeath to us they imbued within our very genetic material our DNA when on the outside when on the surface we feel distant and apart alienated you don't feel intensely spiritual my DAV is just not flowing my my mitz are just not going and I don't really feel and connect even in those moments don't give up don't abandon recognize that it may not be in your heart at that moment may not be on your mind in that moment but it remains in your blood it's in our genetic material we have so much else in our genetic material like irritable bow syndrome and diabetes and so we have so much negative in our genetic material that uh you know whatever so much negative in our genetic material we might as well well we might as well take advantage of the positive in our genetic material and our tradition and it's one of theim of our m one of the foundations of our belief system is that our ancestors endured tests to realize strengths in themselves that subsequently became planted into our DNA that we have capacity and we have strength and we have ability that we don't begin to appreciate that they gave to us and this is one of them that even when we feel apart at a distance we're going through a season of life in which we're not intensely connected to auna to hasem it still remains in our blood it is a morha aasha means it's an inheritance we have this it's an inheritance that we have you see this in this week's para in a few places it says in uh yeah uh speaking of DNA yes a group of Scientists non-jewish scientist decided to determine because the Kahuna has passed down father to son thousands of years they decided to test the DNA of the K right and they all had one thing different than every other Jew the that that's accurate and there are studies printed there's two problems with it one is that there's a tribe in Africa who also had the same chromosomal abnormality so either they're all Co on him or it doesn't mean anything the second problem with it is it's a lovely thought that binds kohanim together but it can't attest to the legitimacy or authenticity of a coing for the following reason it's possible that that coin received that in their Gene through their mother which isn't necessarily which wouldn't make them a Coen so but it is an interesting piece of research so two places in our para we say in aash in our the Jewish people miraculously cross the sea they look back and reflect with a deep sense of of uh appreciation and gratitude and they sing MOS at that moment they sing Shir something no one before them had ever done we talked about in the par class yesterday why what do you mean they were all grateful what's the difference between gratitude and Shir singing to Hashem we spoke about that yesterday so they were the first to sing Shir and in that Shir in the aashir they say we say it every day in our daving this they pointed this is got wow everything's come together beyond my wildest dreams everything now makes sense the pieces of the puzzle are fitting together I'm not just looking at the pinpoint dot in the canvas I've taken a step back and I see the whole picture and when I do I realize God's Divine Providence God's kindness God's greatness and I say Z this this God this is my God I'm going to dedicate my life my relationship with him I'm going to represent him in this world we just spoke about a few moments ago here that we are to be a mirror to reflect godliness into this world and the more that we are aligned opposite God the more potent and tense our projection of God into this world and we're misaligned when we're off a little bit or we're not opposite God at all then we're not reflecting godliness we're reflecting other things into this world so what's the second half the the god of my father and I will exalt him I will praise him well Z if he's your god what do you have to come on to the father said a beautiful Insight said the r z you know what this is my personal God and my journey and my story and what I go through in life and my experiences give me my own unique personal relationship with Hashem but you know what what happens if my experiences and my journey don't make me feel close to Hashem what happened if I'm not connected what happens in the season of life in which I don't feel spiritual said the r you know what I tap into then z uh you know what even if I'm not feeling it personally I remember my responsibility and a link in a chain of those who came before me and my parents and my grandparents and my great-grandparents and everybody had a relationship with hasem and even if I don't feel it personally at this moment I will never compromise this chain I will not be I refuse to be the last link so we strive for a level of zy he's my God I see him I experience him I have my own independent unique relationship with him but even in moments where I'm not feeling that that's what the Reb is saying here is an inheritance we are a privileged generation that when your amuna is waning go find an observant Holocaust Survivor I don't know how you can get a greater injection of amuna in your life whatever you think you're going through and I don't mean to minimize people's challenges and struggles they are real and they are painful but believe me whatever it is Holocaust Survivors went through times a 6 million they went through enormously and those who are heroic and were not judging those who struggle with their faith at all but those who heroically maintain their faith they are a shot in the arm they are the El a that's our a they're all of our Collective forefather who give us the inspiration one teaching a group of teenagers and we were having a whole discussion about evidence of hm's existence and is he here and so on and some of the teenagers were saying you know I don't think God exists and here's why I don't think he exists and I'm confident he doesn't exist and here's why I'm going to live my life with the Assumption he doesn't exist and I said to them they were like 15 years 14 15 years old and I said to them still remember Ram was alive and they all grew up getting candies from him and knew him and watching him and I said to them I'm not asking you to base your faith on the fact that Rabbi Klein has faith that Mr Jud has faith not asking you to base your observance because they do but here's what I'm saying to you are you so sure at 15 and 15 years old that you have all the answers and everybody Klein went through what he went through he's wrong and you're right don't you think maybe you should live a little bit more of Life go through a tiny percentage of what he went through in years or experiences and then draw your conclusion but I said do me a favor at least leave it as an open question at least leave it as a possibility does rabbi Klein's Faith Mr juditz and so many others does their faith not at least leave it as a question for you so that's the we have a tradition we have a history of people we could look at who endured and yet maintained Faith so in our moments of personal struggle where is Hashem why is Hashem or not even struggle just you know I'm not really feeling it that's when we tap into the that's when we go to the savings a Jew has to believe that in their Essence the P at their core they're a believer in their heart there's a light shining bright that sees Hashem with Clarity but what happens there's a thick Cloud covering it up sometimes it could be in the summer in batone 3:00 in the afternoon the sky turns pitch black starts raining and you think I missed M it's time for Mar it gets pitch black out the cloud can be so thick it can cover the awesome bright sun to the degree that you think it's nighttime you're confused when it is and that's what happens with a Jew with a person instinctively intuitively in our kishkas we know there's Almighty we know that something greater than ourselves we know there's meaning and Order and purpose to the universe we know it we feel it we Intuit it what happens life gets in the way people fail us our expectations are failed we endure pain and struggle and these are each clouds and they get thicker and thicker and darker and darker and they cover that sun and even when the clouds are there and we're struggling to make them dissipate but it's reassuring to at least know that behind them there's a bright sun burning in our kishkas in our p in our Instinct we know there's a Hashem we know it I've shared with you many many times already but that's Ra's incredible Insight he says how could you expect a 12-y old girl and 13-year-old boy to have amuna they're obliga all 613 mitzvos and among them is Amun so you tell the boy put on and you tell the girl be careful with making BR and you tell and that you could do they could regulate their behavior observe properly do was properly it's understandable but you're going to tell them the great he asks the great philosopher Aristotle debated and struggled whether God exists but the 12 and 13y old kid should know it Anda they're obligated in at that age it's a great question it's a great question and I see none of you remember the answer so I don't feel bad about repeating it so ra says ra offers a magnificent answer he says you know what the answer is the child is not expected to First learn Faith at 12 or 13 if that were the case you'd be right it's a totally unfair expectation it's unreasonable to think that so many adults who teach and lecture and read and write philosophy struggle but the 12 and 13 year old kid needs to understand it that's not the expectation says the child as a baby knew God existed why because a baby cognitively as they begin to mature they know well I have parents they understand the child understands the concept of a mommy and a daddy of an IM and ABA they understand they have parents that their parents came from parents who came from parents who came from parents and the child ints that I have biological physical parents and it makes sense that I have a greater parent when I speak to my four-year-old son when we speak to him about Hashem he doesn't stop and say one second could you clarify say you know Hashem hasem is so proud of you hasem would be disappointed you isn't Hashem amazing he says yeah hasem you ask him who did this Hashem what's that Hashem he doesn't say you know we never talked about who is this Hashem I can't see him I can't feel him what is Hashem right that's only because you imbued that into your son not because he was born with that agreed I think he would be born with it even if we didn't we reinforce it by talking about it but even if we surf right but even if we didn't talk about it the same way did we ever sit down and explain to him here's what it means for me to be your momy and ABA right I I don't mean biologically here's what it means to be but I'm saying the notion that people are created by other people and brought into the World by other people and therefore we have a responsibility to you and you have certain responsibilities towards us not only did we not have it with our four-year-old we never had that with our 18-year-old that's not a conversation it's something people into it I have parents I'm born to them they have therefore responsibilities to me I have a special relationship Vis them it's intuited and if it's intuited to biological parents it's intuited to our great father as well so what happen says ra didn't Abraham find god without anyone showing him also he L the first one correct he found by himself correct AB that's a bigger question the r tells the whole story The rambam departs from his normal code of law and tells this whole story of Abu how where he came from and so on and so forth but the ramam there is very clear AR did not discover God we know that you know Adam spoke to God Noah spoke to God we shame Noah's son shame spoke to God we have Yesa a so there's a whole history of those who knew and talk to God AB didn't discover God what what the r says that abam did differently than everyone else is they kept that secret to themselves AB decided to introduce it to the world and he revolutionize the world with the concept of ethical monotheism but you're right we do have the M about the breaking his father's idols and his going outside and he's asking certain Cosmic questions that led him to the conclusion that there's a God so says was killed by the Nazis says that the child knows they're God you know what your responsibility is as a parent don't mess it up by the time they're Bar Mitzvah or B Mitzvah don't confuse them don't confuse them don't make them cynical and sarcastic don't confuse them don't introduce the cloud to their life that may be in your life when they're four years old they're happy to sing Hashem is here Hashem is there hasm is everywhere when they're four years old Uncle Mishi is the godor right when they're four years old and and he is unclei is he was here for shabas recently at the weisses I tell him this every time I see him he is a godor he is a of the whole Jewish World of generations of the Jewish world I grew up listening to unclei our kids are listening to Ani and please God our grandchildren will listen to UNI And if every one of us could laugh when I make a joke of Hashem is here hem is there it's because uni right so he helped fulfill this mission of teaching the children Hashem is here Hashem is there hasem is everywhere so at four years old he thingss that he believes it don't mess it up by the time he gets to 13 it's not teaching at 13 that's so unfair even Aristotle struggled with it it's at four he knows amuna don't mess it up don't block it and Cloud it don't distort it don't make it that's Ra's magnificent Inside Yes is it's never too late though right never too late of course not never ever never ever ever that's the that's the some people need to Discover it for themselves they okay a AR menu something doesn't work for people it's nice that this Mor thanks for the inheritance I'm not interested in it give it away to someone else they need to Discover it they need to earn it on their own but we should be reassured to know that we have that inheritance waiting to know that if it's not even at the moment it's not in our heart in the Reb's words it's in our blood that there thick clouds on the left hand column now what is the foundation of the faith to know that it's in our kishkas that it's in our core are we missing Heretics how do we know we're not one of them really ideally Faith would be the natural inclination you wouldn't have to work on it you would know it's there you wouldn't even have to exercise the faith muscle as we say Isaiah the prophet lift your eyes and see who cre created everything if you contemplate the wonders of the universe if you study the intricacies of the human body if you understand how the Sun and the Earth have to be exactly that distance a little bit closer we'd explode with the heat a little bit more distance we'd freeze over there couldn't be life if you study science of the world which is what the rambam says this is the rambam writes that you come to know God in two ways we read his diary I.E his Torah and we look at his creation we study his world and we come to know him so for example right if there were a grandparents or great grandparents who you didn't have the honor of meeting in person and then you discovered their diary and then you also discovered their paintings and their sculptures and their architectural plans you would come to know them through their diary their words you'd also come to feel you know them how many of us have you know artwork or something that our our our grandparents they they um cared about and when we look at it we know them we are reminded of them so the ram writes read hashem's Diary this is Torah kadosha it's his word study his world biology chemistry physics go to the Grand Canyon go to we're going to Zer today but we're not going to see the Swiss ales we're flying to Israel today through through Switzerland sh was asked by his t them why he took off time the Yesa and teaching Torah to go see the Alps so he answered them because I'm afraid said you're afraid reab what does that mean being Torah to go to the Alps he said because I'm afraid that after 120 years I'll come upstairs and Asam is going to say to me shamshan what' you think of my Alps and I won't have an answer for him so you could see you could see hasem we see hasem most most poignantly most poignantly most potently we see hasem most accurately most clearly by studying his Tor we study the diary that's where we have the greatest window into Hashem but you know where else you see Hashem the Swiss Alps in the Grand Canyon the biology textbook the operating room the NICU you see Hashem in his world anding everywhere yeah so just open your eyes stop looking down stop being closed off look around at the world see it understand it experience it and you can't help but say and conclude who who created all this whoever sees the totality of creation contemplates it thinks about it has it penetrate their heart can't help but see the glow of hash's Glory if you have even the smallest amount of of mindfulness even the smallest amount of contemplation you can't help but conclude eye for eye that he put the Sun and the Moon exactly where they are it's not a coincidence it's not Randomness as I just said has to be this distance this angle this rotation everything is designed to work perfectly the human body the pulmonary system the C is every part of the human body the reproductive system the digestive system the in aoda of difference we know the tragedy of a tiny fraction of a tiny fraction of a tiny fraction of something being off chromosome one chromosome in the whole chain of DNA one who designed all that there is a designer this is not coincidence LOM the onus is not on the believer the onus is on the atheist when you look around the world it's not a challenge how could you believe it's a challenge to say how could you not believe as has been said it takes more faith to be an atheist than it does to be a believer takes more leap of faith to be an atheist when you contemplate the world than it does to be a believer person sees a picture a drawn would you say a bottle of ink spilled over and would you believe look at this magnificent painting look at the picture look at the words on the page how could you see the intricacies and the Wonder and the details and the ordination of the human body of the world and say yeah a bottle of ink spilled over and this is what we got if you wouldn't conclude it about the paper in your hands how could you conclude it about yourself about other people about the world it's the most simple evidence and at the same time the most compelling but what's the flaw people make walls and put on masks in other words the simple logical conclusion is Is An Almighty he created the world he's involved in our lives he loves us everything happens for a reason but what happens sometimes that conclusion is inconvenient that conclusion is inconvenient and what do we do when we have an inconvenient conclusion when the facts are inconvenient what do we do we make fake news right we distort we distort the facts and we change the facts and we create alternative facts on all sides of all these issues you don't even I mean I think it's one of the challenges and tragedies of our generation is that we no longer know where to find truth yeah take any given issue of the day and everything you'll read or exposed to about it is agenda driven are the immigration laws unfair or fair is it a ban is it temporary who chose the seven countries the last president this President how should we as Jews feel how should we you can't what are the real statistics about gun laws allowing guns stop crime or just taking away guns stop everything is so agenda driven and anyone who has a keyboard and an inter connection can position themselves and pose as an authority that we are living in an no longer do people have credentials and credibility and facts and research it's just an as long you have a video camera and a Facebook account you can make videos about other people and say whatever in the world you want and and it's shocking to see how many people believe it how many believe it it's just went out there too because of media today yeah social media media internet the it's not the information age it's a misinformation age but it's not only true public life it's not a truth that exists only in the political Arena no it exists in personal relationship absolutely one person emails another person about their friend and that comes an email chain that goes around and so that that's like yeah you talk even if you don't talk Lan hard the information that you get that comes to you about things happening or other people right they're not truthful 100% colored and that's why the onus it's very destructive the onus and the burden is on us that everything we read we have to read with a Discerning Eye we have to be judicious before we draw conclusions before we forward emails before we state things as facts we have to know the source of of the message who is the messenger before we accept it but the truth is that within personal within a social environment and personal relationships no one is interested in the truth you can't say the truth you've got to color it got to be diplomatic you've got to eliminate certain things it's complicated but underlying it all has to be a Fidelity to the truth so a person knows instinctively says we know in our heart The Logical conclusion the obvious conclusion is of course there's an Almighty but what happens that's what I was saying facts get inconvenient so what happens if you look around at what's obvious namely there's a Creator there's an Almighty there's Providence there's Dominion what does that automatically mean for you there's expectations of you it means that there is a Divine will it means there's a Divine Law it means there's Divine expectations for a lot of people that's inconvenient I want to just do what I want I want to do what brings me pleasure I want to do what makes me happy now you're going to introduce that there's someone else I have to answer to that there's consequences and accountability that there's expectations that's not so convenient so what happens says the Reb we build walls and we wear masks we cover Hashem we deny what we intuitively know and we justify and reconcile not 100% sure he's here I don't think he really cares about about that even if he is here and even if he created the world I'm not sure he has a relationship with me so we we create all kinds of workarounds because the facts are inconvenient so we put up a wall I don't know who pays for the wall but we put up a [Laughter] wall they are walls that block the light of the sun the sun is still there it's unchanged just because we're blocking it when there's a thick cloud in the in the in the sky that makes us think it's night time even in the middle of the day it's the same sun the sun hasn't gone anywhere it's just the cloud is now conveniently blocking it I don't remember if I told you this last week but it's a brilliant insight into last week's para Moshe God tells Moshe exactly at midnight did I mention it last week I did God says exactly at midnight I'm bringing the 10th plag mosha comes to power and he says God wants you to know that approximately midnight he's going to be bringing the 10th plague why did he switch from at midnight to approximately midnight did he not think God could deliver so Rashi says because he was worried that parro's clock was going to be wrong when parro's clock would be wrong if it was 1159 or 1201 what would parro say nah every firstborn in Egypt died simultaneously fluke random what a coincidence wasn't God you see he said exactly midnight came a minute before it came minute after LMI what must it be ah wasn't God what a CO wow what a coincidence so the commentaries ask what a CO what are you crazy nine times in a row mosha and Aon warn parro something unbelievable is about to happen to you out of the ordinary Supernatural and nine times in a row they deliver Supernatural out of the ordinary and nine times in a row parro says please make it stop just make it go away now the 10th time they come and say about midnight at midnight God's going to strike the firstborn and Par miscalculated 1159 to 121 could he really conclude that it was a coincidence after the first nine came true and the prediction comes true it's just off by 12 seconds they would really conclude there is no God is that possible so the P Satur says yeah that's the power of the psyche of man exactly what the slab is writing here it's our power of when the facts are inconvenient with the life we want to live we have an extraordinary capacity to reinterpret the facts to reconcile to justify to change to create fake news extraordinary capacity whether it's regarding what we eat in our health and we make things up to justify it you know whether it's about whatever the case may be cognitive dissonance psychologists have a term for it cognitive dissonance is that when the truth doesn't match how I want it to be I this cognitive a dissonance cognitively I have this ability in other words how could anyone smoke cigarettes today it's suicide if you love your family you love yourself it's an act of suicide so how can anyone possibly engage in suicide because they have cognitive dissonance they know it intellectually but they explain the odds are it's not me and I've always done it and it won't happen to me and the chances are small or it's too late for me to quit now or they have to go through something in life that makes them quit but it's cognitive dissonance so what was true for parro in the mitam that if it would have been 11:59 and 58 seconds they would have said oh fluke wasn't God they just needed a hook they needed an excuse they needed a wall they needed a mask they needed a cloud something to hide God so they could pretend he's not really there when he was behind it all along and we do the same thing because of this wall a person falls into a distant separate place from hem because they've placed they've built a wall they now don't see or the great light of hem doesn't penetrate and the person can end up straying and draw all kinds of wrong conclusions so they went through something in life that was difficult that sounded small when they were four years old they were singing hm is there is there is everywhere when they were six years old they're at the PES seder wearing a costum sang Over the D Torah using all of that when they were eight n years old they were they knew it their Kish Hashem was there they knew it at 18 years old Hashem disappointed them at 25 years old they went through something that was difficult and it started as a small well what what if what if he's not really there well what if he doesn't really care well what if I don't really feel and with that little feeling the wall starts small and then it grows and the the four-year-old Hashem is everywhere and I Know It with all my heart turns into kofer umin he's now blogging on the internet about there's no God and the whole things are force and religion is the op of the masses and it's not true and that's the danger of the wall yes I was to say I heard someone say that like people who were turned off to God but had a harble thing happen to them actually came back longer after a trauma or something like that because this the whole experience brought them closer other foot so so I had I I had two meetings yesterday I had I had a meeting with a woman who's not from our community whose husband has endured 10 separate cancers and who has dialysis now five days a week and who doesn't have either of his legs and both she and he feel so blessed from Hashem and so grateful every day and live such great life and volunteer and donate and their extraordinary people and I met later with somebody whose niece had um would it be cystic vibrosis I don't remember and needed ended up needing a lung transplant because of the lung transplant got cancer which often happens with a transplant thank God has recovered from the cancer and I was talking about how she's you know struggling in a dark place and and what I said I I couldn't say this to a person going through a difficult time they have to come to this on their own none of us are in a position to tell it to them but the first meeting with the man who went through everything what he basically said was I have two choices I can go through everything I'm going through and therefore be negative and fabis and resentful and bitter and miserable about my life or I can choose to see the blessing that I have be positive and upbeat and happy and optimistic and be joyful in life so I can blame others or I can make the choice myself about who I want to be and what kind of life I'm going to I'm going to live and that choice that choice is ours and I'm not suggesting that anyone should ever talk to someone going through a hard time this way only so that person has to come to that conclusion on their own it's not for us to enforce it or project it onto them they have to conclude it but the guy said I could look at it as whato was me why in the world would God make me go through all those things there is no God or I could look at it as I went through all those things I really shouldn't be here Hashem is amazing to me look how I'm still here my life while I still have it to the fullest so which way do I want to be right's father who recently passed away who was an outstanding person blessing to our community for the short time he was here went through a very a lot of challenges in his life a lot of hardship you never met someone with moruna five minute visiting with him was a muso was unbelievable at the very end of his life literally in his last weeks of life when it was clear that he was at a terminal illness that there was ala in the natural world zero chance of his recovering from he was telling me when I get better I have to come to SCH to meet with you I have a project I want to start that I want to be in charge of so a person looked at him including his own children wondering wow could he be so naive should maybe should we tell him what the reality is or should we keep it from him because he's so naive they didn't think that and I'm positive he wasn't and I talked to him about it and he said to me you think I don't know my situation you think I don't know the reality he said but I never would have gotten to where I am today and I can't get through these days unless I wake up every day saying auna everything's going to be great and whatever it is it is and it's going to be fantastic someone who lives with amuna is not naive someone who lives from Muna is not detached from reality nor are they using it as a coping mechanism it's not it's not a drug of the masses SC Mark said it is a strategy for life it it is a decision it is a choice happiness is not an emotion happiness is a decision it's a decision that we make I sent on the WhatsApp group this morning the katb ins which I also shared yesterday I like to make the most of I believe in recycling a lot so a big proponent of green Torah so um when the Jewish people they're not three days out of MIM three days out of seeing 10 plagues splitting of a city God's divine revelation in hand they're not 3 days out of all of that and they're busy complaining there no water the water is bitter I'm so thirsty I'm so hungry kind of servic is there around here call this a menu I paid for H they're busy you know they're the Jewish people our good friend gers wadon when he owned a restaurant in St Louis on the receipt was printed it used to say was anything okay that's ran a kosher when you a kosher restaurant so he used to say was anything okay made it on to uh who was it Johnny Carson David Letterman used to have they'd show those things like so his receipt made it onto the show was anything okay that's how we got the reputation because three days three days after Liberation 3 days after being saved from 210 years of persecution they're busy complaining and the Torah says what's the complaint that there's no water and they said the water is bitter and why' they say that water is bitter the Torah says the name of the place was bitterness because they complained the water was bitter the simple understanding of is that the water was bitter comes along the and he says no is not talking about the water you know who was bitter the miserable people when you are bitter everything tastes bitter when you're sweet everything tastes sweet so the cut gbba says the water wasn't bitter they were bitter what do you see everything is perfect and beautiful my friend Tony gelbart likes to say you know the whole debate do you see the the cup is half full or half empty so Tony's got a great aile he's got a great he says no the cup is not half full the cup is entirely full half with water and half with air but it's entirely full so it's not to you see the cup is half full or half empty the cup is full there's a third option that no one even sees the cup is full just half of the water and half and half of the air so the people were bitter so happiness is not an emotion happiness is a decision it's a decision there are there's a clinical depression depression is a very real mental illness there struggles they're legitimate they need treatment medicine I don't mean to suggest that a clinically depressed person can choose to be happy I once wrote about that that's the worst thing you could believe is is the worst thing you could say it's the most unkind conclusion you could have there are legitimate diagnosis challenges and the most cruel cruel conclusion or thing you could think is well just snap out of it just choose to be happy I'm not talking about somebody with a clinical depression I'm talking about the Jewish people I'm talking about I'm talking about is anything okay I'm talking about kimar kimar choose to be sweet and everything will taste sweet in your life choose to be bitter and everything will be bitter in your life life it's all the attitude it's all the attitude that we bring and the same is true with Aruna wake up and God is nowhere and you won't see him everywhere wake up and God is everywhere and you will see him everywhere you look and let you turn and while we think these are emotional decisions and conclusions they're not they're intellectual ones and they all depend on what we choose to think about and how we choose to conclude however who has in their life and they want to fulfill the will of the almighty and they're working on amuna by the way this is another Point that he's making here is that for so many people losing faith is simply a pretext to justify something else that's going on it's not really about questions of Faith it's not really about the questions of Faith it's really about that Faith what faith demands is incompatible with the life you want to live that's for many people what it's about it's a famous story about a kof who came came to ra brisker that's a a heretic who came to ra brisker a a uh you know during that time of the Enlightenment there were um aior so an aporus who had a Jewish Education and who knew better there were many from who went off the and became so came toker brisker and he had says I have a lot of cases I want to ask you my questions have a lot of philosophical questions about God's existence refused to answer him so he asked why wouldn't you answer me I'm coming with questions so says I only give to Casas I don't give to which means I only give answers to questions I don't give answers to answers sometimes people pose answers as a question they pretend they're asking a question but they're really providing an answer yeah I only give toas I don't give to so sometimes is a legitimate question you have to engage the question it's a genuine search for truth it's a legitimate question sometimes the question is just an answer it's an answer of how to get out of a lifestyle it's an answer of how to excuse not being a certain way how to reconcile certain things so that's the danger a person who genuinely is committed to and invested in a life of Torah and Mitzvah and personal growth when they when they approach the question questions they ask them as questions they don't become answers they remain questions and even questions that don't have answers shouldn't become answers they remain questions we have a tradition of take we have a tradition of not always having the answers it's okay to have questions it's okay to live with the question just finish this paragraph the person has to believe so when you feel far from hem when you're not feeling connected when it's not flowing when it's not going for you there's two two reactions you can have you could say well I guess that was it it was a fun ride while we had it I guess I'm done I don't really believe I'm going to stop observing I'm going to stop or you could say you know what I'm looking forward to the clouds disappearing I know there's still a sun behind the clouds and tomorrow might bring a bright day I can't wait for the clouds to dissipate cuz I know he's behind there sh you know that it's clouds blocking the sun you know you don't feel it you're disconnected it's not flowing but that doesn't mean that it's not all true and he's not there it just means you're in a season of life where right now it's not flowing that a person has to be a a Searcher of faith that even when it's not flowing even when it's not going that even when you don't feel it you don't react by therefore ditching it you react by therefore looking more for it searching harder yearning stronger and I'll leave you with a beautiful Insight from this week's paraa that I didn't say or print or publish or text anywhere I'm sharing it with you is that the beginning of the para describes when the Jewish people leave Egypt Hashem gave us God traveled with us when we left Egypt Hashem was with us God went before us and he protected us with The Cloud of Glory during the day and the pillar of fire at night to illuminate the path for us so that we could go day and night and the not here in his safer but in his safer on shos says beautifully what this means is we Jews are to feel that in our journey through life Hashem that hem is going before us both in the day when this Clarity when we understand when things are clear and even during the night of our life even when there's Darkness even when there's dark clouds even when he's hidden even when we don't see him even when we don't understand how do we tap into that how can we feel am when we are when we keep going keep going keep living with even when it's Lila even when you're going through a season or a period where you don't see him and you don't feel him and you feel like they needed and you're struggling for him when you are by the way is the same word as is the way the way guides us and regulates how to go through life on the journey but if we are if we walk with Hashem not only in the good times and the clear times and the easy times but laa in the dark times and the difficult times as well then we will feel that he is with us that he is clearing the way that he is guiding us that there is a meaning there's purpose that nothing in fact is random so have a fantastic day and a wonderful rest of the thank you so much