Parshat Vayigash: Aged Wine - Rabbi David Kaplan

[Music] well Yama Yosef LF of a Neos a photo be quite that's what we said yesterday how that turns into a rebuke you also say I'm Yosef is my brother is my father still alive somebody asked me yesterday White's as somebody s why it says Father in the singular with a uu s my father by father is trollman that question he said to say it almost the same answer that we said yesterday that you'll say this is part of the review it's my father and my father that you weren't worried about earlier number one number two I had a different thought here if you remember when Yaakov when Yaakov sends the the gifts to Asaph do you remember what the first thing that he says I saw was with goats remember we had mentioned that that's a strange thing that that after all these years 20 years at aces upset him because he stole the brother using goat skins and then the first thing that you remind him of the first thing that you remind you that you send them as a gift and we imagine you have a partner in business 20 years ago you had a nasty split because you accused the guy of the guy was stealing money right and and then after 20 years when he wants to he wants to apologize so he sends you as a gift some counterfeit money you know you know you know just you know I I did just in case here you know how how you thought this was real and that sort of thing you know you turn and in obvious said that sometimes that's the ultimate test of does the person really forgive you and it might might I say I know that you're saying you forgive me do what the ultimate test is women really recreate that situation he also sees you know they've gone to bed for been Yemen with Yosef interprets as well if they want the bathrobe in Yemen after selling me down the river and I am ruffles son and now they go to be it for the other one of ruffles son so it looks like they really regret what they've done then yes a throws one more one more little curveball at them an eeo say if iota because my father still alive he somehow he again he mentions that connection between him and Yaakov a very special connection which which which could be that it's like that last test let's see can you get past this guys can you get past the idea that there's a special a special connection there so one of the kappa traits part that I think the toughest I am I think it's time though it's not like this you know I would compare to I've ever been to ever been to a movie I'll have will even to the movie and the movies are some of these mystery what he caught nothing is making sense nothing is making sense at all we can't figure out who's Snape is night until we get into Snape some memory yeah and also everything starts to fall into place and and you go to one of these movies where you know you're confused you're confusing until the very last scene when L see you just going oh then you find out that the bad guy was really a good guy because he was a good guy that's why I made sense everything they did all along even though it was bad it was really good and all it all the whole picture opens up so how much time says you know yo say see brothers were very confused being spies and first the money's in the bag the goblets are the regular take it be government is it you'll see says two words I need you're safe oh oh you oh oh because of that uh-oh it's one long series of those right Oh all right so cover sizes if that can happen with with the king of flesh and blood there's that cadet with the food king of flesh and blood so then then then imagine what happens when after 120 years of Persico we all have questions about what goes on in this world we've all had questions now we all have questions and he get up there and all of a sudden all the guy I need a Shem oh oh you mean that he's got all the questions are answered they had years ago I don't remember all the details of the story but apparently there's a young child who was very sick and everybody knew the child was gonna die and they told the child somebody said to the child I remember who this is attributed it was attributed to the to the Rambam or somebody else and they said that this child do me a favor after you die what you come back to Italy in a dream and I want you I have three questions the first two questions hit through with Torah concepts I don't understand the third question is please ask God why is it that young children died I do the righteous suffer and come to me in a dream and let me know it was I think they attributed it to the Rambam I'm not sure so short while later the child dies and then he comes to him in a dream and he says then the first day and the answer to your first question is that's a good answer that can answer the second question he asked me the other day is this any other and I'll tell you the third question I was gonna ask but the closer I got to God's throne things became so clear that I had no question I just had absolutely no question the question just kind of melted away so I have I can't give you an answer because I never got the ask the question because things are so obvious it just became so obvious right so the cuff implant has everybody that questions but ultimately when you hear an ear Shem hopefully when hear any a Shem so so that becomes that well that will answer all the questions in other words the revelation of absolute truth and everything everything fits of the place that really everything becomes clear ok now go down to putz the case of puzzle cake well you may yell say fellas have your shooting areas are public Davi every other fella hope you soon I live they approached him your money you'll say for he temperature but hardly will seems like I'm you'll see if your brother you sold to Egypt and air emphasize the annuals if I'm the same yourself same you'll say that I was then and that nothing has changed success and success he hasn't changed me at all the ahta and now I'll tie up so don't be sad don't be aggravated values are beneath him don't be upset key MacArthur Massey haenam don't worry about the fact that you so be Kela mutual Canio look you believe that Hashem has sent me ahead of you in order to in order to be a source of of sustenance God sent me here so that you're very calm down it's a famine and all hope the whole plan worked out there's nothing to be upset about anybody have a problem with that anybody have a problem nobody from you're all good with that that's good that's kind of it hey don't worry about the fact that you sold me into slavery possible death don't worry about it you don't work that good listen if you if you would sell me you would sell me you might be able get a good price you know now think about this so you would sell me and I would become vice president and they have kosher meals and a limousine hey Jana worked out good I would have nothing against you believe if you sold me and I ended up in Comiskey Park as a White Sox fan then I'd come after I wouldn't forgive you for eternity but if you sold me if you sold me and I am the vice president with kosher meals hey you know you're welcome in you come into the White House anytime you want I don't care what your intention was all right so that works from his end you mean if you kidnap somebody and sell somebody if it has a happy ending then you're good then you're okay you kidnap somebody you sold them kidnapping is a nice order Raisa there's a sign of very bad meet us when you kidnap somebody and you sell it right and they're there that's okay that's okay as long as it works out good that's okay that's okay so I'll tell you what I used to do with my kids you know here's something to your boy is this so this is more boys than girls boys will be fighting in the house you know to get an older brother is beating up on a younger brother and you get a little tired or you thought you cut it out he keeps thinking about so what my way of dealing with it is our good at a younger brother I'd say listen I'm responsible for your well-being I can't stop him because he's out of control here's ten chuckles I'm paying you for damages yet stops the older brother that stops it yeah yeah you know some days I'll try to cut a deal with him look I'll punch you then we'll split the money yeah that I know it's that I'm not gonna be the last thing I want to say you're gonna make money off of me maybe they usually put a stop to it okay yes I'll give you the money I'll give you the man I'm supposed to I can't control him he's out of control but I am responsible yes I'm giving you money yeah that usually worked so if if what do you that means you're okay that means what you're okay dude cuz he because then what you did is okay find that I don't find that that's our doesn't work that way doesn't work that way you're still responsible so the commentaries say that's why yo SE says the word data and now the word of the ahta means now but he has a double layer of meaning here number one the ahta means no nothing's gonna happen to you but according to our tradition later on page 252 later on in history what happens we read it on Yom Kippur every year the ten martyrs who died on Yom Kippur we read the death of her be a key vote maybe can it have been to ride you on their server game else's so according to the iris al the Asaro game I'll close and when you say that dirge in the Yom Kippur in the Yom Kippur liturgy so it starts out with the Roman Emperor talking to these ten Jewish men tendrich sages and saying to them listen your Torah says that the punishment for kidnapping is death yet we never find that the brothers work when the brothers were executed and there have never been 10 men like you since then say the 10 of you are now accountable for the brothers and he puts them each one he put the torches them to death famous aguar you say you weren't you revving Akiva they raked the skin off and maybe stronger maybe smoke going got all day they chopped is that they skinned him and River should be completely a chaplain so on and so forth so according to the I result they were a reincarnation of the brothers that's why you'll see it says I taught and now there's not gonna be a punishment they're all worked out well but you're so accountable there will be accountability later on in history there will become they come back to the ten brothers and their further torture to death as a atonement for what the brothers did at this point even though what they were doing all all had a happy ending over matter means and now and now though the word that that doesn't seem to be doesn't really isn't really need it in the puss will give you he could have just said hey fellas don't be sad what I said and now don't be sad okay so in context that understand outside now don't be said though waste your time being sad now nothing's gonna happen now but now he has an implication now it won't happen but in the future well in the future there's gonna be an accountability over and it's gonna be the ten marriages I want to show you something else looks like we're not done yet turn to turn to the partials Mattos in the book of in the book of the meat bar so here the Torah is talking about the concept of making an editor person makes that it makes a person makes a makes an ED there that they vow off of something so the Torah describes a woman and the halacha is and if a woman makes a vow her husband has the rights to annul her vow I mean I shouldn't even call know this he's got veto power so a woman comes along says you know what I'm making it better that I'm not gonna I'm not gonna eat red meat for a month and the day that the husband hears it and he has until nightfall the husband say veto he could veto it he doesn't want his wife making a neder that's gonna affect your health is gonna affect her mood it's gonna affect everything else he he has veto power over his wife so if she makes a nether unless the husband ratifies it if he ratifies it he's finished but if he hears the down there and then he vetoes the nether so then the netter does not exist okay now what happens take a look at posting you dia moment the post-acute Jim on page nine oh two is about nine lines from the top theme hah Pharaoh Pharaoh some YCJA be ohms Shama if her husband vetoes it and the day hears it call motes a so selling the rallies are natural logical whatever she prohibited will not is that in force he shahe fear of a semi-circle her husband is vetoed it and therefore RFM should forgive her all right so why does she need forgiveness if her husband he thought if she made a vow husband we need four years okay so that doesn't count whitey why she need forgiveness so rash she says you know we're talking about we're talking about a woman who vowed off of something in her husband Vita there but she didn't hear the veto and then she goes and breaks her vow has she done anything wrong has she done in a Vera why not because well the veil about what was her intent her dad wants to break it you know imagine you walk into the you're walking that I'll see you open up the refrigerator there's a cheeseburger in a McDonald's wrapper and you pull it out you pull it out and you say hey this looks good right and you take a bite out of it just then your brother comes in he goes how did you like that part of a cheese that's what he says yeah I bought I bought you know it's kosher - kosher burger with Parvati's I put it in a McDonald's wrapper just to see what you would do all right I put in but it's really is kosher all right are you serious yeah also it sounds good anymore right hey I thought it was good next bite doesn't taste as good because now I know it's good you know once it was forbidden it was delicious right then next but now it doesn't taste as good now did you do something wrong yeah what'd you do wrong the intent but did you technically did you do a nivara yet the Torah says you need an atonement okay listen carefully listen carefully says the Gomorrah when rebbi akiva would come across this verse in partials Mattos rib Akiva would cry he was it Wow if when a person intended to do a Vera and didn't succeed the Torah says have a shame you suffer you need an atonement so that when you intended to do Anna Verity did succeed you certainly need an atonement oh boy oh boy and Reba Q as a boy we're playing for keeps over here and Ruby Kiba wouldn't cry every time he came across this puzzle but the obvious question is a lot of people read this puzzle why I didn't really keep a crowd where David else correct why did only Ruby keep a cry over why didn't he else cry a lot of people read this puzzle why is it because they worked on him before him there I'm all right after only Ricky they read this post candy crowd so the I Rizal says let's go back to what we said originally the ten brothers in the ten murders the martyrs our reincarnation of the ten brothers Shimon comes back as whom as rebbi akiva and Shimon was the catalyst of the entire thing so rebbi akiva senses in his neshama somewhere where the conscious or subconscious I can't tell you yet some level when Ruby Kiba reads this passo he senses that as shamone who was the catalyst of the sale of yo safe even though it turned out good but its intention was not good so he understands it there's going to be some sort of who's gonna retribution and therefore Ruby Aquila is the one who cries because it's unlevel he senses that he's the one who's going to somehow and we find the rabbit even someone who gets raked to death he gets that he suffers the worst death of all in rebbi akiva is the one who is then cries because his shinbone he understands Shiva was the catalyst of the sale of Yosef never make you understand this is accountability that's why we keep it cries nobody else then in the secured out now let's get city where we work so that he also reveals himself to the brothers and he tries to Capiz that he's them you didn't sell me a Shem took care of it and quickly go to my father and tell him to come down to come down to Goshen and I'm gonna take care of him page 254 and then impulse at 14 he says this is me and I'm sure he shows them that it's him then it was like fourteen eight lines nine lines from the top vyi paul outs have already been yummy enough heath he how does the arts go translated he falls upon his brothers bit Yemen's neck vias get he weeps and others he's hugging around neck who benyamin baha out savoir even me I'm gonna fell on his necks plural really means that sever of his neck but it could also be understood in Hebrew as plural now take a look at Rashi it's the right column three lines from the bottom right column of Rashi three lines from the bow and pulsing adalat on page 254 ye pull outs of our abt I mean okevia he cried he found the neck of endearment he cried why i'll Schnee me crushes see the millions with Rocco maneuver cellphone card he cried for the to base like meat dishes that would be in binyamin's portion they're going to be destroyed Reuben yeoman both out suburban you mean cried and y'all say snack aisle Mishka and she lost Elio spicoluk OSHA Yeltsin suffer he cried for Mishka and Sheila which is gonna be in yell saves the minute the tabernacle of Shiloh I mean that's quite a time to cry for these things you know you haven't seen your brother for twenty years and you're finally giving it embrace then you're crying about two future based on English's the medium is crying for you sir two questions here number why are they crying for the future why they cross crying Petey I'm in Chains you're gonna cry about the basis of medium and should cry about his base of me because you yell safe we'll grab our gun Sheila why is Ben yelling yo she's crying for Ben Yeomans base let me coach doesn't mean young man is crying for us which country look so do questions about your crying for the future so the answer is like this is very interesting you know there's a gumar that says mother that says that anybody goes to a wedding and you bring you glad in a custom see go to a wedding and you glad in a possum I call it Miss America song it's as if you rebuilt one of the ruins of your life it's an interesting thing you got a wedding you got a glad in the cousin why do you have to glam there's no custom glad already why do you have to go make him happy I went to think I isn't a groom normally happy I mean you're getting you're getting gifts there's good food there's also a wife you know but it you know yeah you know yeah I mean animal most of most costs are pretty happy if their way happy anyway why are you glad again the answer is that I think I think the answer I didn't see it I just think human nature is such that this is the moment of truth for the cousin he's making a commitment over here you know and you're making a life commitment and you know on the one hand yeah you're happy about everything but you know I hope I'm doing the right thing and if everybody else is dancing they're all in such a good mood that's must be the right thing to do that makes them very happy by the way the way you make the husband tender you make him happiest is not the date you know that you dance and you do everything else the real way to make him glad you know how you really what's the the prime way of making him happy to say something nice about the hunk of the column it's what you say more than what you do you walk over to us and say wow I heard her dead loaded I mean I heard she I heard she's a really nice girl a man she's a really nice girl whatever you say I heard she's just a wreck and use any adjectives it could be very ambiguous don't say anything about her looks by the way I don't say the about her looks you just say something I heard she is just unbelievable he's just a terrific guy actually terrific just terrific right even if you don't believe it and you know it's not true it's your sister that doesn't matter doesn't matter yeah you say it anyway you make him happy make him think who everybody thinks this is a good idea everybody thinks it's okay he'll find out soon enough but everybody everybody thinks it's a good idea okay so the guy gets rich guy gets Ricky and make him happy it's as if you're rebuilt one of the ruins of your tour what's the one thing Ethel it the other you're standing there juggling and you just rebuilt or one in the ruins are you showing something out there the other so the answer is like this you see why was the base of meters destroyed the second base of English anyway the one the the longest exile we have to now clean our faceless hatred why is Yosef and in Yemen been separated for 22 years she knows we know mothers the embrace of Yosef and bin Yemen is really an embrace that shows hey why were we separated to begin with and I want to thank so they do you know when you cry they're crying tears of joy right these are tears of joy when you see somebody you haven't seen for a long time those are tears of tears of joy and if you something who you want to see obviously you know it was a guy you owe money to you know nobody cries you just cry those are tears of pain right but if it's something that you really enjoy you cry in there too a forced separation you know why you're really crying you're crying at that moment this is there any anytime you crying life out of joy the tears from joy the joy should bring laughter not and that not crying if you're crying is because at that moment there's a memory of some sort of all of all the sorrow that you've had the fact that we haven't seen each other for 22 years there's a lot of pain contained in there and therefore Yosef iminium and when they crying number one they're crying because what caused the separation was baseless hatred which is exactly what destroyed the second Mesa video so we throw the the first base levitus which is there's only seventy year gap there but the second base finishes the main goals who are in in Binyamin Christ Rio states of Michigan Sheila but don't you're saying the rectification what's why are they cross crying because how do you overcome baseless hatred you know where hatred comes from I'm gonna say to come right hate the guy you know where hatred really comes from hatred is only because of a concentrated self focus the reason anytime there's a fight any time it is a disagreement anytime there's a dispute because you're focused on you and I'm focused on me that's why there's a dispute if I be focused on you when you'd focus on me we wouldn't be fighting at all if you would worry about me and I'd worried about you we wouldn't have any fighting at all you're worried about you and I'm worried about me the rectification is that you cross over the replication has been yeoman's concerned about yo states Michigan yo says concern about the young uns base of English's and that's the rectification for the citizen and which put us here to begin with both in their time and in our the in our in our current day and age that's why when you go to wedding you've built up one of the ruins of your life when you go to a wedding it's this guy's it's his simcha what are you going to wedding for I'm not talking about what we do I thought what we should do never confuse the two when I go to the wedding the first thing I look at is you know Who am I sitting next to at the table and what's the main course right the fact what's supposed to happen what's supposed to happen I was also good at a wedding and it's all an afterthought it's wasn't good waiting on something thinking about the cousin and how am I gonna make this guy enjoy his special day that's what I'm really supposed to be thinking about so the first thing I do is you know I check out the menu hit the hit the you know the the the drinks table right then we'll worry about the hustle then we'll worry about the hustle I told you I was in Chicago boy this was torture in Chicago it was 1985 I wasn't I was out thank heavens I was out of Chicago at the time the beers were playing the Super Bowl in 1985 and of course the game was at 3:00 in the afternoon and some guy in Chicago was getting married at 3:00 in the afternoon very very very very difficult test so there were three types of people there were some guys that said listen footballs football a guy gets married once in a lifetime I'm going to the wedding Super Bowl just a bunch of nonsense the other people said listen the bear is good at a Super Bowl once in a lifetime you know the guy might be getting married more often yeah he's likely get where more often the Bears go into Super Bowl hey you know forget that yeah I'm calling to watch the super oh then there were the meet that then there were the bane who knees there were the middle level people who went to the hotel where they had the wedding and they kept sneaking up into the room upstairs to go watch the TV to see what was happening at the thing oh yeah very very big test a guy who goes to a wedding and you're going to gladden the Hussam that means what you really say it's not about me and so me about you it has nothing to do with me this is all about you oh and it's as if you've rebuilt one of the ruins of Jerusalem because you schleimann was destroyed because of sin s kena the opposite is to go and show concern for the other person you show concern for the other person you've rebuilt one of those are ones okay let's go on we have what there's one more very essential point I want to get to today take a look yet posix 16 plus ik 16 now remember yesterday I pointed out back on the previous page the back kind of previous paid on page 250 - I told you there's a puss ik we're gonna have to come back to on page 250 to buy ye tain s Kolob you king eight lines eight lines from the top last word on the line ye taters called before Yosef Christ by Ishmael meets Ryan VII Shabab a sparrow the Egyptians and the house of power they hear about Yosef crying now turn to the next page look at what 660 plus ik 50 10 lines from the top by in a shake like Olaf ugh he kisses all of his brothers page 254 by F Calais he cries on them he weeps on them docker a faint deep breath of Ito that his brother started talking to the hawk called Mishima a sparrow the voice the sound was heard in the house of pyro lamer news reached pyro bow after Yosef yes his brothers have arrived by Gita vein a parolee Nevada and it was very it was very good in the eyes of power in the eyes of his servers power and his servants were happy why are they happy that Joseph's brothers have arrived where there was one thing you got to do with the other over here right where they have you here the news reached pyro that yo saves brothers who cut me up I was happy and servants are happy the inner circle the cabin is happening right why should power be happy now imagine mr. Powell i matter mr. Powell all of a sudden news reaches the president your your finance minister is crying hysterically here to present in United States so if it's your military general is crying you're fine hysterically it's not assumed you know there's some sort of nuclear nuclear war about to happen do you tell me your Finance Minister we don't your we heard news your finance minister has broken out he's banging the carpet he's crying hysterically what would your reaction be if you're the president that's not so good it's not so good you know 1929 here we go you know it's hit this I checked the stock market the first thing you do is check how two markets doing and you get nervous guys your your presidency depends on the economy you want to be president make sure the economy's good your Finance Minister is crying hysterically and all Sen you find out your it would throw president the panic and all sin you find out his brothers arrived oh good oh it's like family reunions right because that means that when I was afraid of isn't with me what happened I was afraid that he was crying for some other reason all it's a family reunion yaha it's very sentimental it's terrific then I'm happy yeah good take a look at panco vase he sends the brothers back he gives everybody gifts he gives Benjamin more than he gives everybody else which is almost a way of showing confidence in the brothers I so believe you've got over this business I could do exactly what they did to me dad gave me more knee gave you I'm giving the German more and I gave you right and that's the way of showing it because I know that you guys don't care about it anymore I know that you guys have gotten over that jealousy thing that's that's that's the best way to show confidence I could even show I can even show that I have no problems anymore it's like your first baseman makes an error you throw out a ball to the first baseman makes an error so on the next ground ball you throw it softer no I'm gonna throw it just as hard they got full faith in you I have full faith in you you're gonna catch her this time right you don't you it change that's the way you show faith in the person you made this mistake once I'll do it again and now I showing you that I'm so confident that you've gotten over this but then look what he sends yaakov last word on page 2 454 Lulla of these shala kazoos he sent his father a sorrow Comorian no simply to be trying 10 donkeys carrying the best of Egypt we'll see what that is in a second the F Vanessa as so knows 10 donkey yet no see no soz bar vilaça more muzzle carrying food l'viv Ladera okay take a look at Rashi me two of me try him top line and the right column of Rashi on page 256 top line right column last two words on the right collar me to me time he sent them from the best of Egypt what he said but Cena but Gemara we find in the guar Shoshanna flow ie Neosho nice old scent of Asian wine she does is a cane him no ha Amana older people are pleased with it older people enjoy why'd he send them wine and why is it that older two people are pleased with wine why do you send them wine why is it that older people are pleased with wine something very unique about wine yes wine is the only food other than Romanians salami but it wasn't around at the time wine is the only food that we find that if you longer you leave it the better it gets any food that you leave any food normally when you leave food or cheese cheese but cheese goes with white but any any of any food that you leave normally and even the cheese why does it she's become better it's really is it isn't it bacteria isn't it what he called right wines that bacteria wine is - is an ageing process of wine it does not obey the natural laws of nature any other food you leave it you know finished you leave it out for a few hours it's gone food rots domain gets better sometimes sometimes it gets better and if it goes off what happens turns into vinegar is an expression in the Gemara when the Gemara wants to criticize somebody whose father was its addict and he became what somebody perceived as a Russia he's called vinegar the son of white interesting expression is that home it's been yeah and the Gomorrah calls him vinegar the son of wine right why because your father was wine he was its addict and you became vinegar so what's the first message Yosef wants to convey here's wine your wine and I'm wine I didn't go off 22 years 22 years at the University of Arizona right you would have expected you'd expected some effect on his personality all right some effect that 22 years in San Francisco 22 years in Las Vegas 22 years in Monaco 20 years just about anywhere in the world yes I said some wine I'm still the same your wine and I might I didn't turn into vinegar number one number two older people like the wine why do older people like the white why you see you see in in the world at large I heard about the there was a hospital there was a there's a guy one of the doctors was an oriental I think from Japan or Korea or something run of doctors one of the patients was about 85 years old the doctor referred to him to another doctor and she what treatment does she need today so the doctors are worried cause she it's a heat in their language their culture II called he says they because where we come from after 80 years old a person deteriorates therefore we've referred them as he is a sheep and in Torah you see it's obviously the opposite right stamen was it was a mere hundred and 403 Rover yeah she was a hundred and two lucid clear to the end to the final day if Sheinberg was 101 Rashad was 107 hey it clear it clear is it because in the world at large the older a person gets the more he deteriorates also people kind of in on bother me and I hear what are you worth it more in the Toria see to the contrary we look at our olders with respect they've got life experience they've got wisdom and we respect them more so it it it defies the natural than the natural tendencies because the natural tendency of the world is a person gets older you know move over it lets somebody else take over and tour it doesn't work that way the older you become the more your family looks up to you if a person's got some connection to Torah res doesn't connection to terrorist say you're right that it becomes foolish references got a connection to Torah see becomes better with age so you know say if they're saying to the oculus I think warrant says and older people older people liked it better because wine does not obey the natural laws of the world therefore that's the message the other convey dziak [Music] you [Applause]