Parshat Chayei Sarah: The Life of Sarah - Rabbi David Kaplan

okay page 106 hey I saw my uke sir may I show the vestry fellow chefs on a mission hie syrup the life of sir was a hundred years twenty years and seven years the years snake I ate sorrow the years of the life of sorrow but Thomas Sarabhai curious are vahik a road Sora dies in a place called curious diary at Arbor thank you very much which is have wrote the arid skin on but Yoga of Rome least fell deservedly because ever comes a cry for mourn for Sarah the eulogy I started to cry for her do you notice that there's a small huff and the word of the leaf coast saw that means when you're looking at safer Torrey you'll see that the huff and they were to believe because I threatened smaller than smaller than normal so the first thing the cabin Terry's point out here is how did Sarah died how did sort of die so the famous Meldrick there was a shock the Sutton came to her Satan came to her and he told her about the Ocado and before he could tell her the it's like didn't get Jack that she died of the shaft shock that she thought he thought he had died that's how she died one thing we'll see we'll see why this was and we'll see how this wasn't why this was so the custom so for one of the classic commentaries in Jewish history is over says well you know that God gives you what what goes around comes around and very ironically when Sarah was told that she was gonna be a him a son what was her reaction she left he didn't believe it so when she was told he would be born she didn't believe it so her definitely when she was told he was died she shouldn't have believed that that's how she died idea that you know you didn't believe it when you should have so then you death kind of a well you did believe what you shouldn't does i guess i'm so for points out very interesting strange is a little connection there now you're a you know yeah alex your reactions that's how she died nineteen everybody from because he was all about the akkada so let's try to understand what's going on here those good sounds go now you'll notice that the torah says are their very first post look says but you say a surveyor shana veteran chef name Shinae hey sir the years of the life of Tsar now that lassic spread that last statement seems to be redundant you just told me what her lifestyle was why are you emphasizing the years of the life of sorrow so obtained two stories the first one happened in Israel was on unloggable Homer there was a guy who went up to me Rowan actually from my neighborhood he was driving back from Iran and a couple of from a couple a surfer ride back here July so they got in the car and he apparently was tired from all night being up and that sort of thing it at some point he apparently does that the wheel ran off the side of the road and the wife was killed the woman pastor was killed a mother of 13 children not a terrible tragedy the guy was you know he was he was just wreck to himself was just wrecked I mean woman died he was driving dad said terrible so he went to at a certain point here for three or four days he went to the house of Shiva at the Comfort then he got the husband he got the father of this young young lady and he was there in a guy's an absolute wreck no this was a blamed himself he fell asleep at the wheel he claimed I think he'd said he didn't vote Kia ran across the street some thought whatever it was but he was the one driving the car dude I lost control again so the father said to man I understand what you're upset does the father the woman has just been if they're less than 113 orphaned grandchildren so I understand what you're upset the Torah says Sarah lives on in 27 years Snape is our that was her like lifespan now the way she died is because God manipulated a certain way for various reasons one reason the Philosopher's reason had it not been that she would have died of a heart attack but there was it she was gonna live under 27 years he said that my daughter was meant to live a certain amount of time that was the day she was gonna die it had not been in your car she would add our to that yeah nothing blame yourself for she was that was there was her lifespan it was a surfer Dave hey sir so the the the capillaries point out that is the attitude that is the attitude or so they're what often happens is whenever people go especially the house of mourning somebody died so know it's on people I know all the details what it was a terrorist attack where did it place was by sharks I'm okay I'm okay I never go there there's a certain amount of you know what happened that well he would he was sick was he overweight you know you know it's what you want to hear he was overweight well although they get happen to me because I'm not overweight or are you did he smoke to they say you know what did what did what did he do I'm okay any here no is a perfectly healthy young person who just dropped dead in the middle of life oh well oh it's a guy not young one way one way or another one way or another we tried to try to find some way how that day has nothing to do with me one way or another how that has W the human nature surro Victor Miller Victor Miller never asked details he never has what's the difference he died how did he die my look I'm of us the angel of death fiato so so you need to know what details better I think they're Miller's grandson died in a car accident and they came in Feldman told his grandson died he never asked how what's the difference what's the difference what's it what is it look at you I make conversation that's a sir theater we have a policy in our home we have a policy nobody comes in nobody brings bad knows something tragic you're gonna find out you find out resent don't find out for me it's not something people enjoy being the barrel did you hear the news right in our home we have a policy we try not to talk about people at all I don't say we always succeeded but in general but that don't be the bearer of bad tidings unless somebody needs to know because it's a if it's something elevated that I need to go through somebody else to tell me other than that sir just to make conversation talk about something else where was it don't make conversation about that the Toray attitude is there was the time the time had come no that other story there was a guy in back in the anime in the 20s who used to go the Jew lived in Israel and he used to go recruiting in America he would fundraise and when he fundraise he would recruit buckram to come to the heifer ownership in Eretz Israel so he went to Chicago after to be in Chicago back in the 20s a certain family in Chicago and he recruited he'd get man had a 17 and 16 year old son and he said you know maybe send your son to 0-3 Shiva and covering him okay yes and his son from Chicago sends with the covering and Shiva is in the heavens over a couple of years and in 1929 was a heaven Massacre and I think over 50 buffer more killed the herbs and kefir and they were they riled up they killed over fit so this boy who ain't been from Chicago happened to be one of the victims it was killed in a febrile massacre so the man who did the recruiting he took Chicago off his recruiting list because he couldn't face the father you know that the father would blame him if not for you my son wouldn't be I'm going to discover in each other so he took Chicago off his off his recruiting list and and he was he went the other places so one point he was in New York now the father of this boy from Chicago was a businessman and he happened to be in New York on business so this guy went to a shoal to give his his his pitch you know for money interests and boys to Isha veneers Israel and this man happened to be there sell fig finishes his speech he starts leaving the shoulders man couplers a shawl Latham says Oh mr. Wexler how are you it was Wexler Issa how are you this is good you know I haven't seen you a couple years in Chicago Arvid you come to Chicago anymore says well frankly you know I dated Ruth I couldn't face you I know you blame me for your son's death and I honestly couldn't face it he's a casa shop I don't blame me for my song he says my son was meant to go at 18 years old now he could have stayed in Chicago and it would have been a very ordinary Jew I had the merit because of you to send them to you seven area so it became a budding Tom McCall Club yeah boy boy learned Torah he died is the boy to learn Torah I have two runs Granite's with you 18 years old that was a that was the life allotment anyway that's what the real Torah attitude should be the real authorities know unless a person does something absolutely silly absolutely stupid a person yeah and say well you know I have a life allotments I could go jump I want to practice wings and jump off of a roof now let's see how it worked and blamed God when it doesn't go to way he wants it to yeah well that was the life allotment yeah yeah that you can't do on the other hand the attitude towards the other swords and towards life and death did that little coders world wrong decision now let's get the Alex's question why does sorry have to die as a result of the of the akkada very powerful idea and you see the ideas like this when when Avram Aveeno has passed the tenth and final test and the Midrash says that on his way to the Ocado the Sutton himself tried to stop him old man the world's gonna say you're out of your mind is one medicine said he turned himself into a river into a little pond so that they had across this pond and he came up to her yet slugs neck and they still swim through and he even went to get suck it he said you're a young man your whole life's ahead of you what do you Letty is you're letting this man go to you slaughter you he tried everything he can to stop over movie no in ever of Aveeno goes and it fulfills the akkada and this is our greatest merit and rosh hashanah we constantly talk about the akkada in order to defeat the that the sultan was trying to prosecute the jewish people so there's only one less chance that the Sutton has in order to take away that marriage from robbery to post facto which is watch it you're sure what could he do to make him to take away the merit of the Ikeda what's that very good there's only one way to lose your marriage for a mitzvah if I do I'm it so let's say I do a big Mitzvah and the guy guy doesn't mitzvah the next day he eats pork he doesn't lose the marriage for his mitzvah you're gonna get rewarded for the mystery getting a pots treating pork is that it's like one cancels out the other doesn't they go well today I'll do another because tomorrow I plan on doing a mitzvah you do admit so that's great you deserve it are you gonna get it for the other era also there's only one way to lose your merit from it so you know what it is to regret it you do a mitzvah say I did the Mitzvah so Dave and I both had an opportunity to help a little old lady so I walked over to help the little lady they walked in the other direction and found the wallet stuff for $20,000 cash oh man did you know that wallet was there no oh man why did you help the old lady well I wish I would never done that boom you just lost your Mitzvah you just lost the merit of the Mitzvah Sutton's got one last chance what's his last chance I've Raveena's gonna come home he's been told by God because of this your children I gotta have a merit because of the akkada and I'm gonna increase your offspring he can't wait home to come home and share the news with his wife he can't the good news is unbelievable and what happens he comes home she dead oh man how'd she die he starts asking people how how'd she die what happened but it's anybody know well the Sutton came in reported the occasion the icater caused her to I give out I wish I would have never done that boom you just lost America this is the Sutton's last attempt in or in other words if Sutton has certain powers I don't know what his powers are he has certain manipulative powers of testing people now she has to die she's gonna die but could have been a heart attack so the Sutton's able to manipulate things let it be through the akkada oh it's through the Aikido now I probably know might regret what he's done so what does the tourists say I'm from you know limits his tears leave cosa he cries less than he normally would have you know why the more you cry the more you elicit emotion I probably does want to tap into that source of emotion which may bring out a form of regret therefore leave cosa he purposely cries less the Torah puts a small stuff you know why I wrote one who wants to make sure that not Hashem in other words not sincerely and not that anybody around him should think that house is home he regrets that Ikeda therefore our Vina limits his crying it's a small Huff it's Luke oh so okay no so what does he do impulsive gimble the Torah says like this but yo I'm sorry sorry it says by Yeovil Aram Lisa polis our relief kossei comes to eulogize Sarah and to mourn for her now take a look at Rashi it's in the right column and Rashi it's one two three four five six lines from the bottom Valvo ever six lines of the top sorry right column right column of Rashi six lines of the top says Valvo Avraham me be heir Sheva he comes from beer sheva to eulogize syrup okay now so they're different it's all discussion where did he come from what was he doing in Bern Sheva she was in heaven there's a metric that says you know where he came from one meddra says he came from the funeral from the burial of tear off his own father apparently Terah had died around the same time he buried there finished where his father came to bury sorrow there's another message that came he came from the akkada he came from the burial of Terah to eulogize ur here's another measure to says he came from the akkada and then they here we ever came from beer shovel he can't cover them all three I mean make up your mind where'd you come from a different pain is where he came from okay so somebody once said imagine what you'd like to have written on your tombstone would you like to have written on your tombstone person to think you know what we'd like to hear said about you Jay I had a friend whose father was a real card I mean I was he was the little bald guy in shield sitting that back made all the jokes drink you know with all the young guys you know there's like one in every show right his name was either L or norm you know there's like one guy like that is it with all the kids usually rich and he tell stories about how he made his money he's got a really laughing okay so we had a guy like getting our shul - this guy was funny and when I was a teenager you know as friends with his son and the only one that ever thought he was funny is usually his own son so so he was once at a family saying he had a bunch of brothers they were all crunch of clowns really funny guys so apparently there was a family celebration we're you know some support or whatever it was kind of go whatever a family get-together it's at a certain point he took a bouquet of flowers he laid down on the couch with the flowers on his okay everybody I want to hear eulogies now I don't want wait till I go I want to hear it now and you better make it good and every one after the other they got up they had a eulogize him okay the guys you know the guys see what I got I was at a memorial service a few years back his son was there my son is now an adult hopefully you know I just remember at the memorial services sunny after tomorrow serve as those a friend of ours had been iftar and his son you hear his voice you there all right it was gonna be the next one of us to go yeah just taking a following his father's footsteps so so what do you got so so this the you know person think what do you want to have written on your tombstone whenever an item you know most of what most people have written under Dillard the eulogy what do you here at eulogies all the time even men that in the Jewish will forget the firmware forget religion what do you usually hear to eulogy oh is a loving father he was such a kind manner so generous it was like somebody in the crowd go alright but it's the third thing I understand but the guy spent his whole life he was trying chasing money drink beer probably running around oh yeah you know yeah how you can put away a six-pack ya know why they say that but at the eulogy well they talk about a six-pack oh he was loaded oh he was look drove a nice character this is a guy was really into cars you never hear that says well here lies L he was really into cars right all you hear is some oh yeah you know I once saw him hold the door open for a little old lady and he was really you know he once gave money to a guy cuz he had you know he had 45 cents left in his pocket you know what to do with it you know he's about to go through a metal detector the airport okay but he gave it to some poor guy was there was groping to find something nice to say about the guy which we would consider nights they never talked about what he did most of his life why not the answer is because at the moment of truth everybody knows that that's insignificant every knows you can't take you you can't take your Jaguar with you and that your money doesn't matter and nothing none of it matters it's a moment of truth everybody knows everybody knows in and in the real in the Jewish world for sure that way how much Torah did he learned how kind he was the people that's what you hear well what would you like a written on your dumb stuff you have to live your life in a way that people are gonna write that any to himself there was a kyboots here in Israel I can't make this up if I went to as a kid what's the left-wing kids thank you like it was here in Israel there's a guy in the covers of the kibbutz Baker and he had apparently some off-the-charts apple cinnamon cake that people were gaga over people love this guy's the kibbutz a baker he made an apple cinnamon cake that was just just cats me out on his tombstone he had them write the recipe of the apple cinnamon cake and people would come to his tombstone to visit if they come doesn't about written on your tombstone I mean said that's what you want renamed tombstone they're only gonna say things about you and write things on the tombstone if that's what you are and a person has to live his life with that and time with that in mind so if I probably know is coming to eulogize sorrow physically what geographical location did he come from he came from beer sheva that's where he was but he's say eulogy about his wife where did he come from we even used an expression and English guy and when we speak you say so where are you coming from right meaning what's behind what you're saying where did Avram come from he came from two places when you lunge I saw when he took on the world alone represented by his father Terah in his idol worship pagan world who helped him bury that world he came from the burial of theraph she was his partner in burying that world that's his first praise for his wife that's a eulogize er in the second thing he came from the Ocado that means if you've raised the son who's willing to stretch out his neck and be slaughtered at the akkada where does that influence come in a child comes from the mother that's rates coming from the ultimate praise from a mother is a son who's willing to put on tefillin he's allowed to go to show he's willing to go up on an altar and stretch out his neck that's where he's coming from where did he come from physically geographically came from bare Chevrolet croshy says where did he come from and singing the praises of his wife oh he came from doing away burying the world of tariffs and he came from the akkada that's what the virtue of sight