Parashat Vayetze - Can jealousy be a positive thing in your life? - Rabbi Alon Anava

so there was once two factories uh right next to each other manufacturing the same product it's a true story and they were both doing more or less the same one of the factories hired a certain worker that came added Twisted shifted did whatever he could and slowly slowly that factory started becoming a little bit more stronger than the other whatever marketing he did whatever management he changed whatever he could in the factory and suddenly slowly that factory became stronger than the other one to a point that it became so stronger that this H worker came to the owner and says listen we are so much more stronger now that we can buy now the other guy and the owner of the company says no no no I'm not interested in buying the the competition guy doesn't understand why why won you want to buy the competition and he continues his work and the factory is growing better and stronger sales is stronger everything is becoming greater the other Factory is becoming much more weaker in the market and he goes again to the owner of the company and says listen this is a good opportunity now we can buy our competition he's struggling he doesn't have work we're crushing him no two three attempts like this at some point the guy is like you know what I'm not being taken serious maybe I'll just quit you know I brought this Factory to such success but I coming with such a a good idea and he's not taking me serious so maybe my place is not in this company he goes last chance to the company owner and tells him listen I don't think you taking me seriously I'm telling you analytically financially now is the time to strike so the owner of the factory says I'll tell you why I'm not interested in buying the other Factory cuz the other Factory is mine and I opened the two factories initially only to create some type of like a comp a competition but not really a competition to create motivation in the factory why whatever brings out the best of the individual is competition when there's a when there's an enemy when there's jealousy when there's the desire to be much stronger than the other that's when you get the best out of an individual if I will buy them yeah I will win the competition but I will lose the excitement of the fight we all have in some type of a way a competition doesn't matter where it can be at home two brothers one is stronger than the other one is a better student than the other competiting competing on the the attention from the parents can be in the Sho one person always comes the first one you always the one who comes last there's always going to be a place of competition can be in your place of work this worker is more diligent is more successful sells much more and you just you br one sale to this month and this guy brings 10 sales a month there's always going to be some type of competition in any environment that you might be spiritual physical work Finance it doesn't matter you're always going to see your competitive doing a better move than you and then what happens you startle whoa whoa whoa whoa where did he bring that from and after you startle what Happ happens it starts developing hate and jealousy that's how usually it works today I want to talk about one of the most important uh messages in the Torah that affects our day-to-day life [Applause] [Music] sometimes Hashem sends us some body that we should be jealous of and like I told you it can be your job that you were the top salesperson suddenly somebody else come sells much more than you you have a certain profession comes your competition sells much more than you more popular and it can be in any type of respect like I told you it can be in the spiritual world I'm a teacher now of a community I'm the rabbi of the community another Rabbi comes into the City and starts taking all the ATT attention so sometimes a person sends a person in your life so you will be jealous of now at this point I'm going to call it healthy jealousy not jealousy that you hate and you you want to do horrible things I'm talking about healthy jealousy right now and like I told you can be a better worker a better student a better whatever it is makes more money his kids are more on the path of the to it doesn't matter somebody that you look at and you aren't happy because that person is doing much better than you this type of jealousy has to take us instead to a of a place of hate to a place of how can I become better that's what happens when Hashem sends you this individual into your life and we all have it by the way you might now ignore or say m me I'm not jealous person I'm also not a jealous person but somewhere along the line in your life you will meet somebody will call it now your competition and it arouses jealousy so when Shalom something like this happens instead of taking it to a negative place that develops hate and then the jealousy is a very negative jealousy you need to take it to a place how can I become a better person and that you're going to so to say go out of yourself and demand from yourself more that's really when Hashem sends you uh a person like this in your life man before we start it's always good to start the class with a question in this week's par we are introduced to I think one of the most exciting in the Tor yob runs toan then he runs to to ra the whole story with laan he's working for ra I mean it's a very full of excitement Paras the half the tribes are being born I mean very significant parasa and in this par we find a very disturbing message that is on the surface how hard to understand we find in this that the Torah blames Rael of being Envy of her sister and Ra was a Envy of her sister then he she goes to Yakov I don't have kids my sister has kids bring me kids I need I want kids too if you're not going to bring me kids I'm going to die that's where the soap Oprah raises the the volume in this week okay I understand Leah is the one who has the kids she has four kids she's already you know shooting forward than all the four mothers if we divide the 12 tribes into four mothers Leah should have three kids she already has four she's already one step ahead of all the mothers and I understand natural Rael wants to have kids too but to go to the extent to blame Rael for being jealous of Le what good does it do to me the reader to see that the Torah says that Rael was Envy of her sister does it add anything to me couldn't the Torah just say and Rael wanted kids to that I understand Leah has kids now Rael wants kids why do I need to know that Rael was jealous of Leah what does it add to me to put ra down to make her less of a person what is this information give me stop for a second your reading and ask yourself what what does it give me this information that Ra was jealous am I here to not judge Rael was she right of being jealous was she really jealous what's going on here but what's what's questioning me the most is why does the Torah think that this point is important for me to know because after all the Torah doesn't throw information for no reason if the Torah mentions that must be that there's something I need to take from that now the thing is why is it such of a shocking question because ra is the opposite of jealousy Rael is a jealous individual I mean we find in many cases in the Torah jealousy we don't see with Rael the that she's jealous on the contrary we see that she's she she gave the the place to her sister to get married that's jealousy she could have married Yakov I mean you know the story I'll go through the story in a few seconds but she she's not a jealous individual she was supposed to marry yov she on the night of the wedding she knows Rael is going to be switched with Leah and Rael goes to Le and give her the secret car that Jakob won't think anything and then you coming and telling me she's jealous of of Leah she doesn't look like the type of jealous individual it seems that throughout her life she's the one all the time who's giving in so why is the Torah coming and telling me and Ra was jealous of her sister when we see something like this that's where you need to stop that's when you need to ask a question and that's where you need to understand understand what is the Torah trying to tell me so let's go through the quickly the story that we have it fresh in our mind we're going to call this story the success story of Leah after all yakob goes down to Khan and he sees Rael he falls in love with her he goes to Lavan he says I want to marry your daughter Rael Lavan says no problem seven years work and you'll get Rael everything on the surface looks fine but suddenly Everything Changes seven years passes yob is waiting to go into the K and marry Rael and Lavan switches Rael with Le now the problem is that for seven years while Rael is waiting for her wedding day Leah is kind of waiting for the day that she's going to meet asav because it was known there are two brothers yob and isav who are twins some say that ra and Le were also twins just Le was a little bit older in a few minutes so it was known to everybody that if yob is going to marry Rael the young one goes to the young one then asav is going to marry Leah so seven years Rael is waiting for her wedding day jumping up and down in the field and uh fantasizing of her coming husband and Leia on the other hand is saying okay so she's getting the good one I have to now one day meet asav and in the meantime she opens the newspaper and all she sees asav was arrested for fraud asav was arrested for drug trafficking asav was arrested for rape like a PDD whatever he was so she's saying this is what I'm going to marry now the guy on the on the news so one girl is waiting for her beautiful wedding day Leah is waiting for now I'm going to meet this hlim and finally seven years come her father says don't worry Leah you're ain't marrying isav you're marrying yov you're the first one and he switches her in the in the wedding it's you know it says thatan on purpose did the wedding on Friday night and on purpose somehow the Lights Went Down and he did whatever he needed to do and whoop he switches Le with ra which of course there's a lot of questions about that we're not going to go into the to the commentary about how can such a thing happen but I can see such a thing happen dim light two sisters possibly twins kind of look the same Jakob is not the type that took Rael out every Friday night on a date they saw each other they fell in love he went to work she went to wa he don't he didn't quite remember her didn't meet for seven years they didn't live somewhere together it's not like what we think so he barely even remember how she looks very easy to to to to switch in the wedding and yes she was covered dim light jakov is excited jakov is Aid he's not thinking right now of the beauty of his wife he's in there okay so right on this point already the lack of Leah chain anes seven years she's doomed to marry El Capone and suddenly she gets yov everything switches in her life suddenly she's on the top the Fate has changed and right after boom she gives birth to four kids and the important ones not that Shalom the Tora says these are less important but if you're looking who came out from the first four I mean all the kings leim I mean all the major figures in our history came from the first four tribes so Leah not only that she has four children right on the spot the the the elite of them and Rael nothing now the Tora of of course goes very fast but if Le had four kids that's minimum 5 years which means that five years that she's having B babies realistically could be more but realistically we're talking about 5 years and Rael is nothing every Shabbat meal is coming with a bunch of kids and Rael is sitting there Shalom and she sees her sister with you know a bunch of kids around her and with her nothing and before that before she even blinks boom ra brings that brings that other two she's already have half of all the Min of theim so what is left for ra so already Le without even blinking past ra with how they say with flying colors and finally finally she gets her own kids Rael and then she dies she doesn't even raise her own kids raises bamin and ysf that's the story in the short version and when we looking at this story everything is like thrown in the face of and really the the the topic or the theme of par is the power of prayer and the power to change your ma if you're looking at the theme in general of the entire par that if you wanted derive something the power of prayer because we see ra is going to yov please you pray I don't have mitv you have you pray for me and sure enough she gets pregnant but not only that the how prayer can change your your entire life that's really the theme of the Paras but now we're asking a question how does Rael act when she sees that Leah kind of passes her she marries before her she has kids before her everything is before her how does she react okay it says that's what the says in our Chapter 30 verse 1 and Rachel saw that she had not borne any children from Yakov and Rachel envied her sister that's what the Torah tells me now why the Torah adds the concept that Ra was Envy of her sister does it really important can you judge let's say she was jealous can you judge her no I wouldn't judge her she was supposed to marry Yakov she was switched she backed up now le is getting everything I can say you know I understand that she's jealous but why does the Tor think it's important for me to know that she's jealous not only that the verse continues give me children if not I am dead now she's already threatening yov give me children if not I'm dead I'm a nothing without a child let me ask you something else if her sister wouldn't have six kids if Leia wouldn't have six kids wouldn't she want to be a mother the answer of course of course she would want to be a mother so what why is that making her jealous of Leah you understand the simple question what the D is not clear let's say Leah wouldn't have kids Leah let's say would marry and Rael doesn't have kids she would still want to have kids she would still go to yov and say I want kids so what is that going to do with jealousy even anyway she would want to have kids it's not that she's jealous of her sister she's upset she doesn't have kids let the Torah tell me and Rachel was a upset she didn't have kids that's it the same thing with Rifka last Paras she was upset she didn't have kids and she turns to please you pray I'm a daughter of a wicked individual you a son of a sadik and you are a sadik so why does the Torah instead of telling me and Rachel really wanted to have a child why does it tell me she couldn't have children but she was jealous of her sister she would be she would want a child anyways and the word v is one of the most hardest harshest hardest words in the Torah you know what it means I mean it means in Hebrew and she was jealous or and she had Envy but the connotation of the word it's very bad negative word it it it testifies on some type of anger it doesn't come in a nice way it's not coming in a positive way it looks like she was very vulnerable maybe misj Justice going on here I mean after all where else when you see in the Tor the same concept it's not coming in a nice way next week we're going to read the same thing that theim the tribes were Envy of ysf and they were jealous of him which means they were angry how he's getting treated better than them it brought anger to them misjustice vulnerability look in the entire Tor every time you'll see the word that's not coming in a positive way it's coming in a very negative way something is going to happen right after that I'm jealous same thing now we're going to see with the shim with the tribes that they jealous with with ysf or what we saw with K and Heaven every time we see this jealousy something bad happens like we're going to see they go kill everybody that's that's jealousy what are you touching our sister that goes Ona you see that from the this jealousy comes Rage or something bad so why does the Torah enter jealousy into this concept why do I need to know that Rael was jealous and what does it add to me does it add anything to me does it make me like Rael more does it make me like her less do I understand what the message is better now cuz Rael was Envy luckily for Rael all the commentary come to the aid of Rael okay that's likey for all the commentary says she wasn't really jealous she was maybe jealous but she didn't want evil Rashi said say no no no no that's a good jealousy she was jealous of her good deeds she wasn't jealous of her that she married first and she got Yakov bear in mind that when Le gets Yakov she Rael doesn't know that in seven years she'll marry him it didn't say anywhere and she didn't know he's going to marry her in her mind she lost her love of her life so Rashi says no no no no no when the Torah says Rael was jealous of Leah she was jealous of her good deeds she wanted to learn from her she wanted to be like her it's a good jealousy Rael understood that Leah did something that changed her luck maybe she gives donations quietly what's called mat just the other day somebody asked me something about charity and I don't remember now the whole discussion but but the concept was it was my daughter who asked me it doesn't matter all the details but I told her it's considered a much greater Mitzvah when you give charity with no that nobody knows that you gave the charity nobody needs to you don't have to make a whole fuss out of it have your name all over the wall it's a much greater charity when you do it quietly you give the person and if the person doesn't even know who gave it to him even better ra says maybe Le is giving money quietly nobody knows she has some type of Mitzvah she's doing something she's doing something that she changed her maal completely maybe some good act some good deed something is she's doing to change her maelle that's what Rael figured out cuz Rael was here suddenly she goes down Leah goes up all the way up so she comes to yov and she asks him can you prayer can you pray you are a sadik she understood that even with prayer you can change your luck now again luck in English is not the right term in Hebrew is mazal okay now I know if you translate the word mazal it's luck but mazal is not really your luck mazal would be more your your fate your destiny understands that that that can be changed especially with prayer she goes to Yakov and tells him pray you're sadik you have power in your prayer prayer that my luck should be also good and we also know that prayer can do that I mean you're familiar with the story I told you that story a lot of times I'll repeat it very quickly just for the sake of the example this story is about the daughter of RAB AKA ra also her name was RA this story can be found in the T tracted chabbat page 100 156a and the story says that RAB AKA had a daughter and while when she was born the stargazers or whoever you want to call them told him unfortunately we see that this girl doesn't have good luck good mazal and she will die on her day of a wedding so of course all the all her life RAB AKA was not waiting for the day of the wedding but sure enough the day of the wedding came and he in the next day he was like okay now it's going to happen I'm going to open the a call in the morning to see what's going on what's going to be the fate and sure enough she calls him in the morning and tells him you won't believe at night I was coming to the tent or to the cave or wherever they were her and her new husband and she had like all her hair in a like some ponytail something and she had like a like a pin holding the hair she took out the pin so all the hair can go down and you know like stick it in one of the cracks in the wall and in the morning she pulls the pin out and there was a snake there that came to bit her and she killed the snake so AKA saw what's going on and he says what did you do she's like what do you mean what did I do he says You must have done something you did some type of act that changed the fate and what happened she acknowledged that while the wedding was going on and this is like a big wedding AA that's the Reby of the generation can you imagine what type of a wedding it was thousands of people were there needless to say how wealthy he was was a huge wedding so as the wedding is going on his daughter Rael sees a homeless person walking in and he barely has a place to sit and doesn't have a a plate to eat she takes her own food and she gives it to this poor person SOA says on this act okay this is a verse from The Book of mishle Proverbs proverbs 10 verse two that charity will save from Death so that's the famous story with and he understood that a certain act changes your fate that means that a good act that I do can change my fate can change my ma Shalom I can go into death or into any situation and a certain act that I do changes it so really if you you want to look at it the right way Rael is looking at the success of her sister and understands from that that she needs to do some good act here that's really what understands then she goes to her husband and tells him can you pray for me pray for me to have kids this is a still doesn't explain to us why the Torah is using in such a not nice way a negative word and she was Envy of her sister okay so Rael sees the success of Leah and says something needs to be done here or up until now everything makes sense but why is the Torah now adding that she was Envy of her sister it still doesn't explain to me now if ra if you want to look at it in objective way if Rael has some type of Merit is the fact that she completely kill jealousy if we're looking into some Merit in Rael and what is that Merit Merit that she actually is the one who pushed away jealousy away and in that Merit by the way we have the the Merit to come back to is and to build mdash that's our Merit the fact that Rael gave up her place in the wedding with Leah Rael knew that they're going to switch she could have protested she could have come to yakob and say whoa whoa they're planning on Switching don't marry her she could have done whatever she wants really but she knew what was planned she backed up she gave Leah the the secret code and she gives Leah the blessing to marry the love of her life after seven years of waiting so if Rael has some Merit on her credit is the fact that she gave up the position of marrying yob and she gave it to Le and because of this Merit by the way we as the nation of Israel have the Merit to come back to is and to build mikdash I'll explain it says in the tal in Tred Baba batra that when Yakov ER finished the how do you call the negotiation with laan about the marrying ra it wasn't like that he came in on a white horse said I'm the son of RKA and I want to marry this girl Lavan you know was questioning how's your portfolio how much money do you have where are you invested are you in crypto where where where do you have your money from what's your vision what's your horizon it came of course negotiation you think Lavan will just tell him okay you can marry my daughter the fact that he tells him go and work for seven years that's already but nevertheless the second that negotiation was Final and Lavan and Yakov shake their hands and Yakov thinks okay I'm going to now work for this guy and in seven years I'm going to marry his daughter Rael the next second Rael tells him my father's a crook you can't take his his word is worthless you shaking now a hand with a crook doesn't matter what paper he gave you you can wipe your tus with it my father's a thief he's a crook he's a liar anything that he promised you won't happen yov being such a innocent individual says an innocent person a a wholesome person sits and learn to Long doesn't even know what's going on in the real world he tells her why would he lie to me what's wrong with him why would he St lie to me why you telling me your father's a liar so ra answers because I have an older sister that's why you really think he's going to give you to me when I have an older sister he's a very traditional individual first he'll give the older sister to you he's cheating you he's tricking you you know it's his name was laan arami it's the the same letters of ramai ramay means a cheat a con artist a charlatan everything is with him conning why would wouldn't he call you here so yob says so what do you think we should do so because they're not going to see each other so yob says I'll give you a code word and the code word will be KH KH is the acronym of the three mitv that the woman needs to be familiar with before she comes into uh marriage right Kal she has to do D for the kalat is the family Purity and is lighting the candle that's the acronym of the three mitv that the woman has to be prepared for nevertheless that's when she comes to a wedding that's what she prepares for that will be the code it sounds normal says this is the code when you hear the code then everything everything will work fine comes the wedding of Leah I mean comes the wedding of Rael Lavan switches the wedding dress from Rael to Le everything is Switched Rael approaches Le and she says by the way when the Katan comes to you you have to tell him Han Rael didn't even tell Le that she's switching that's even something that most people don't take to consideration Rael didn't tell Le I'm giving you the place to marry the the Le didn't see the wedding gown getting off Rael and putting on her the wedding gown was just waiting on the on the bed Rael pretended like just a wedding day and when she comes and gives her the code she doesn't tell her by the way it's the code between me and yob no it's something general that a bride has to tell the the groom right after the wedding ra doesn't even tell Le by the way I'm doing you a favor here that you won't get humiliated that you're not going to get now now shamed in front of everybody what's harsh is that later on we read in the torat that after Leah has four kids one day Yehuda comes back from the field with these flowers called dudaim and why with these flowers because they're very good for getting pregnant for Fraternity so Rael comes and asks these flowers from leak and do you mind giving me the flowers that your son brought can I have them it's good for me to get pregnant Leia lashes out at Rael and tell her not only that you took you almost took my husband you want to take also my my the flowers that my son gave me Rael gets it all the way and still Leah doesn't know that Rael gave in the code and allowed it to happen so the of RA of giving over the place and not saying anything that is the Merit that Rael told hasem not to be jealous of the of his Nation when they're going to idolatry you know there's a long story in the mid the mid what we read on I mean we read the me but the mid on this me explains that that right after the destruction of the first temple they all you know left yush can you imagine of the scene they have the temple standing there for 410 years and suddenly the temple is destroyed the whole yush is being destroyed and they're all being led out of yush into Exile can you imagine how that's how that looks somehow they went through out of yush part probably from the you know the direction that they went through eata next to the grave of Rael so all the leaders of the generations the the maybe the whatever whatever Prophet we had whatever leaders kohanim they probably went through the C of Rael and started crying praying for Rael the midash says that at the time bet mikdash is being burned the nation of Israel is leaving whoever went to K Rael to the grave of Rachel to pray mid says that abah comes to Hashem and says listen after a 100 years of waiting for a child I took a child in your command and I was ready to sacrifice him isn't this enough of a merit for you to forgive them Chim says no comes to hem and says I was the sacrifice I was was 37 years old I wasn't a little kid I by choice in your command went and sat on the altar isn't this enough of a merit sh says no it's not enough of a merit that Nation went against me they went for false Idols then they're going to be punished the mid says that one after the other great sikim came to hasem nobody was able to convince hem that they have enough of a merit to forgive the nation of Israel till ra came and Rael says I wasn't jealous of my sister I gave her the place to marry yov and you are jealous of this nation that they went to idolatry why and then Hashem says answers back famous verse from the book of 31:1 15 translation stop your voice from crying there's a reward to your action and the the nation will come back to their border and sure enough 70 years later after the punishment they came back but it was the Merit of Rael that gave in to and gave Le that Hashem says for that I will forgive the for and says I'm not going to forgive other situations not going to forgive but when Rael came and told him you jealous of this nation I wasn't jealous of my sister so really it's rael's Merit that we have we as a nation have the Merit to come back to is doesn't matter if it was 2500 years ago or now but up until today what Rael did is stand to us as a merit not only to return to Israel also to build bet mikdash so to take from ra the best attribute she has and to you know flip it on her it's almost like saying Moshe was arrogant or Abraham was evil how you say Rael she was jealous she was the complete opposite how come the Tor comes and takes like the the strongest attribute of Rael and say and Rael was jealous of her sister that doesn't make sense when we see that Rael was the epiphany of giving in and no jealousy whatsoever in order to understand this whole concept we have to mention another situation in our history and that will help us understand there is a eulogy in the books of the prophets specifically in the book of Shel bet chapter 1 verse 26 okay shmoel Bet is shmoel number two and this eulogy is David King David saying to yonatan to say goodbye to him and he says a very weird sentence that by the way up until today a lot of people twist the sentence in a very distorted way says translation I am distressed for you my brother you were you you were very pleasant to me your love was more wonderful to me than the love of women that's and needless to say that many people like to distort it David and yonathan were gay Shalom to say such a thing but when you read it in English that's how it sounds but nevertheless David King David is saying goodbye to his so brother to his best friend by saying to him your love to me was so great greater than love of women so some has to be some type of hint here I mean listen let's completely negate the option of them being gay okay that's not even an option for the Crooked mind of some people but still what is the what is David theik telling me here what is the prophet telling me why what is the message in such of a claim so there's a wonderful explanation from a great meal I've mentioned his name a few times and we actually learned from some of his teachings his name is the lived about 500 years ago a little bit less than 500 years ago great Nal amazing commentary on the on the Torah and he says that what David means that your giving in your V is greater than what your grandmother did to my grandmother okay let's remember that Jonathan is the great great great grandson of Rael and David is the great grandson of Le so David tells yonathan the act that you did about giving in Le to give give up not give up give in is greater than what your grandmother did to my grandmother the see this were words in he in English never work well but in Hebrew says the fact that you didn't have any jealousy Mr yonathan is much much greater than what Le did to what Rael did to Le because Rael and Leia are sisters you and me are strangers we're just friends that's why it's greater than the love of women not me loving women the love of the two women of these two mothers these two sisters now what's the story let's understand the story sha understands that he's he lost his leadership right Shmo comes to him and tells him three strikes you're out now comes the big question who's going to take the kingship his son yonathan or that schme benai David okay sha understands that he needs to somehow move away the competition because if David is there as a competition he might take the crown and then the whole kingship is moving from One Tribe to another from the tribe of binyamin to the tribe of Yehuda and his legacies is all going to be destroyed okay and if he somehow removes the opp obacle which is King David to be then Jonathan can be the king okay David agrees with Jonathan that Jonathan should Snoop around what is his father is planning after all don't forget that's his father-in-law for David sha is a father-in-law and he tells Jonathan you go and Snoop around what does David wants to do okay so the next day is the big Feast of thees yonathan Goes To The Feast David is not there shaol says to yonathan where's your friend says what am I secretary he's not here he didn't show up find out where he why didn't he show up to thees meal so he tells him he went to his family he went to to sacrifice uh uh uh uh to give a sacrifice in his own Hometown doesn't say have to be with you okay next day second Day meal David doesn't show up same thing sh asks Jonathan J tells him I don't know he he went home sha loses his temper that the David didn't come to the meal and he pulls already out his short sword and he already uh he's coming to kill his own son he's coming to kill Jonathan okay and it says to yonathan you don't understand that it's either you or him okay so either he's out and you're the king or you're not the king what does yonathan do he goes and he saves King David he goes to the field they had a deal with them how to shoot the arrows and Jonathan comes to David and tells him don't come home he's going to kill you he's planning on killing you to get you out of the equation yonathan saves David's life and of course what is the result the crown goes to David's head and not to Jonathan so really yonathan gives over to David you be the king I give it right David says you're giving in your lack of jealousy is greater than ra and Le what you did is much much greater than the act of RA and that's the explanation of the ramao that David says your love is greater than women not that David loved him more than he loves women rather he says your love to me you did an act that is much greater than the love of these two women that Ra was she was in such a high level she was like you take the man to be the husband saying in other words that our entire history of our nation is leaning on the fact that Rael did not jealous her sister and then the tah comes and tells me that Ra was jealous of her sister what that doesn't make even sense and if we want to add more to the greatness of Rael in there's a big question how could it be that Rael and that Jakob is marrying two sisters we discussed that already numerous times yov marries two sisters we allowed to marry two sisters according to the Torah okay I'm not going to get into all the explanations now I did that in one of the previous years but the the on the surface explanation it was before mat it was before the giving on the Torah before we had any restrictions they didn't have any restrictions the fathers only after we got the Torah came the prohibition so there you go so he married a sister besides I have explained if you remember in one of the classes that the prohibition was if you live in Israel if you live out of Israel you you don't have this prohibition so yob lived out of is and the second that he came into Isel Rael died he could have two sisters in Isel and there's a lot of other explanations how he was able to do it but nevertheless the reason why Yakov was able to do such a thing because it says in the Torah don't marry two sisters because the jealousy will be too great and then it will cause one of them to be jealous of the other and to hate the other that's what the Tora says yob says with these two sisters that's not happening that's not H I don't see such hate and jealousy between these two it will never happen with these two sisters Rael gave the secret code to Leah I can't even imagine hate and jealousy between these two in these two in Hebrew it says the Torah was not talking about these two sisters talking about other sisters so again we are set with the question we have all the signs that Rael was the complete opposite of a jealous individual why is the Torah entering this fact that she was jealous and what good does it do to me what do I take from that after all this what we just explain what was left from Rael the fact that the Torah said that Rael was Envy of her sister and now if we go back to the what we read before how come the the sacrifice of didn't impress hem but that impressed hem do you have a some common sense some a normal reasonable explanation the AA that up until today the sacrifice we're using it for almost anything to use as our Merit suddenly Hashem doesn't think it's a merit I'll explain to you why of course it's not my explanation I just read and give it over the explanation why hasem wasn't impressed by the aka the sacrifice of to use that as a merit and the the fact that Rael let go he used that as a merit because that is a one time thing let's say Hashem would tell Abraham continue then abah would Slaughter it would be a onetime thing and hell right ra saw every day every Shabbat meal she's sitting there with her husband and kids every kanuka every puim well they didn't have kanuka every holiday every family gathering every B Mitzvah every is every day the challenge is daily the ifem would allow Abraham to sacrifice it it would be a one-time event in history so hasm says okay one time here for the rest of rael's life she has to see it every day she sees Le walking hand with hand with yob and says that was supposed to be me that's much much bigger than than once in a lifetime that's every day soem gets much more impressed in Rael than in abah a so after all this and everything is explained clearly what is the toorah trying to tell me I just explained to you for the last hour how there's no way Rael was jealous and the entire image of Rael is the opposite of jealousy and the Torah finds it important to tell me and Ra was jealous of her sister must be a very important message between the lines that I need to take from that when I see a person that is very successful and especially much more successful than me but in important things then you have to let that jealous bble I'll say it again when a person is much more successful than me but important things he comes before me to pray in the minan he's much more diligent in his when it comes to doing mitv he's two steps forward than me when it comes to learning the Torah four steps forward than me seems he's having the whole connection with AEM much better than me and how he approaches other people with a much better kindness than me much greater patient than me I can look at another person and say this person is much better than me he's what I want to be then naturally I'm jealous of this person how come he does it how can he how is he so successful why does he have more success in everything that he does totally natural that I feel now inferior to this individual and needless to say I start to have jealousy I want to be successful like him that's the point when you need to let the jealousy bubble why our sages explain this is explained in in babra page 22A when you are jealous of somebody who's a scholar it will gain you a lot of wisdom why cuz you want to be now successful like that big Rabbi now so it will cause you to learn more to wake up earlier to be more diligent in your to be more appreciative to your work to be it causes you to be a much better individual why because you're jealous of him but I'm talking about positive jealousy of good important things not jealous because his wife is more attractive than mine that's stupid jealousy I'm talking about when I see when I'm going on my path of a let's now take a pause and focus just on you don't think of anybody else right now think of you you are targeted to work and serve to Hashem right if you're sitting in this room right now or you watching on the screen right now you are targeted on AEM your mind is not elsewhere if your mind is elsewhere you're not listening to this class which means that who you're already listening to this class we have a common denominator you already threw your arrow to the Target I want to be devoted to Hashem that's the common denominator we all have if you don't have that then you're there's a big problem in your life Hashem is number one in everything I have a lot of goals me I have a lot of aspirations I have a lot of dreams I have a lot of marks on my timeline that I need to do conquer I have a lot of a lot of plans for myself but after everything and just for you to understand what I'm talking about to be a much greater servant to hasem to learn much more Torah to be a much better example to my kids and to raise them to Torah to love AEM to be good hearted God-fearing individuals I mean I have different goals in my life spreading toah in such of a way I I have my in Hebrew it's called my my targets but all together the ultimate Target is constantly focusing on Hashem the knows how to move you away from the ultimate Target which is Hashem blinding you with some money success blinding you with a business success blinding you with some type of a success that you'll get you know off of the real Target the real Target is to be focused on AEM for me and for every other individual if that's not your target you're you're doing it wrong your life is not walking on the right path the the Target that you need to be focused on is only Hashem what does hem want me to do that's a question that I ask myself a thousand times a day what does hasem want me to do in this situation that's a question I ask every few seconds I meet a situation Boom the screen goes down what does a want me to do here does he want me to be firm does he want me to be kind does he want me to let go does he want me to fight what does he want me to do that's the number one question I ask myself every day thousands and thousands of times and I might be exaggerating with thousands but I ask myself all in any situation so it's literally hundreds of times a day that I have this question that is triggered in my mind what does AEM want me to do right now I can be very firm I can answer hard I can smile and not say anything does he want me to fight in this situation does he want me to put my foot down does he want me whatever and this can be with reacting to my child asking for something this can be a stranger in the street this can be a situation that is happening why CU constantly I'm targeted on hasem every second of my life is I need to do what hasm wants me to do and how many times do I have a situation does hasem want me now to leave every everything and go to my S and pray now it's time to pray or do I need to push this away and to deal with this I mean constantly I have this yo-yo in my mind of course in a very healthy way not in a sick OCD way but why CU I want to please the master of the universe I want to do exactly what hasem wants me to do at this giv moment and Hashem gives you the tools gives you the knowledge there's no difference between me and you you're Focus has to be constantly on hasem nothing else of course your spiritual growth your financial gains your business your loved ones your relationships but everything is under the title what does Hashem want for me so if Hashem is not number one then there's already a problem in my life so going back to the fact that we all have the common denominator that I want to focus on hem and I want to constantly spiritually grow then that's where hasm is going to throw distractions into my life and in many of the situation bring a person into my life that makes me look this big now again I know a lot of people don't have the jealousy in them at all but nevertheless when it comes to your personal matters there is going to be that one person that arouses this jealousy if your jealous if jealousy is your weakness then for sure you need to pay attention but you have to understand that hm is going to test you not with basic things he's going to test you where it's really really really really sensitive and then there's going to be this jealousy towards another person now comes the Torah and tells you when the jealousy is for something positive let the jealousy bubble in you why the jealous of a scholar will make you wiser the midash on this point says if there wouldn't be jealousy in the world world people wouldn't be doing nothing you would be just sitting all day long doing nothing what causes you to do something is that you seeing that person now you want to be minimum in the same level of that person the other people's success is your drive to start doing things people come first to the Sho and they pray in a very focused way you say I I want to be I don't want to be left behind everybody the conversation is Talking Words of Tor throwing all sorts of sources you don't want to be left behind you you don't want to be the ignorant one standing there you also want to have something to say or whatever it is in your life you need to focus in your life where you feel that another person is inferior but to remember that when I see somebody that is better than me in good things none of is a better cheater than me or he's a better Thief than me talking about that he that individual is achieving what I set to myself to achieve in a positive way then the jealousy needs to Bubble why because that will inspire me to do much better when I look at another person I say I want to be like this I want to be great like that successful like this I want to have this pride and another unbelievable message that it brings this entire story is teaching teaching us something very very powerful is teaching us that you have to live your life to the maximum not to settle to okay I did enough that entire story is to bring you to a place that I'm here in this world for 60 70 80 years the maximum I need to scrape not to come and say okay I took 60% if you feel you taking less than 99% from this world then that's a problem and that's most people their day is wasted or nonsense hours are wasted on nonsense the knows to put a smartphone in your hand and you go like this hypnotically the news the situation around you puts you in a place of H don't want to do anything the sad reality is that most people don't it take advantage of this of this place just the other day my wife needed to do something she she added oh by the way I'm doing this and that which would was a very big burden I told her why and needless to say a big inconvenience to others when I asked her why are you doing that she was like I need the extra Mitzvah that's what she says I need the extra Mitzvah I'm already going from point A to point B I'm already doing this whole thing I know to do this task is a headache inconvenience not convenient whatever it is but I need the extra Mitzvah on the way I need the extra Merit and that Mitzvah will give me that little extra Merit that's the right way of thinking I'm already here take with you a few passengers most people they don't take advantage of this world they don't take advantage of their opportunities what you have today you might not have tomorrow available for you and most people are on a conveyor belt walking in the same place not growing not achieving anything no goals whatsoever no aspirations walking tired on a treadmill just trying to keep your tongue inside so Hashem will put these individuals in your life by saying look a little bit of effort look at the success a little bit of hard work look at the success there's some individual that we know you probably might even know him that needed to go through a lot a lot of hard work he needed to put a lot of effort but eventually he got exactly what he wanted he was old of age and single couldn't find his other half for many many years and all the advice that he got from me and many other rabbis is get your act together get get your life together you think a wife would want you you think a wife is looking for a a bum you know 22 you in your late 40s you need to to shape up you need to shape up spiritually doesn't matter he took himself extremely serious in regards to coming and praying every day and learning and it was a big challenge but nevertheless after he did his entire transformation met a wonderful wife they have a child okay so the point we want to take from this unbelievable story is that doesn't give she gives in for Leah to give to to come in but she doesn't give up hasem gives us every day and we need to fight for the maximum every day that Hashem gives you and you wake up in the morning and you say mod it's for you to do the maximum what is the maximum I can do today not the minimum just to get by sh is not expecting or he doesn't want you just to do the minimum to get by you have a day that you just got by that's not a successful day when you wake up in the morning is like how can I get the maximum out of this day that's what ra is telling us ra is telling us I'm willing to give in but not to give up so you have to understand that every moment in this life is important I'm telling you already most people don't take advantage of their time they don't take advantage of the the situation that hasem is putting around them they just going through life and not taking advantage of everything CU hem gives you a lot of opportunities that today you can just grab tomorrow you won't have them so Rael is coming to tell us life is about grabbing opportunities every moment Hashem gives you an opportunity you can give in in a situation that's very Noble but you never ever ever give up so really the message behind the fact that the Tora is trying to tell me that Rael was jealous Rael was not jealous of her sister she just looked how Leah is Dil diligent in her service to Hashem in growing a family and raising a family and being an amazing wife and exactly like Rashi says she was jealous of her good actions she wanted to to be B good like her sister now can you imagine when you have somebody next to you that is like a star successful in everything and at the Shabbat table the father says wow look how successful so and so and you like in the shadow there's always going to be this situation doesn't matter who you are there's always going to be somebody that's better than you and Hashem is going to make sure that you see that that person is better than you that jealousy that you have in you has to be used for a very positive way it has to inspire you to become just as good as that person it needs to inspire you to even if you're not going to ever be good as that person but it needs to inspire you to be good better than what you are now to grow to the next level not to look back not to pass another day and another day and another day Shem is showing us how the days are going like that it's not that it's me or you everybody feels that you do have before the the smell of the Bim is is evaporating it's already Thursday you all experiencing it it's not that I'm the only crazy one why hasm is telling you I'm giving you so much opportunities you're not grabbing them strong with your hand so many mitzvot are passing in front of your eyes and you're just too tired or you too busy or you now occupied with other junk is coming and telling you look at the ones who are on the fast lane that are grabbing I told you once life is like this video game subway surf that this video game for the ones of you who are lucky and don't have a smartphone and don't know what it means it's a boy I'm sure there's different versions of it and he's running on subway tracks and he has to jump somebody's running after him of course the and he has to jump off the train carts and off and but the point of the game is to get a lot of coins there's a lot of coins on the way and you go from one lane to the other and you grab a lot of coins and every now and then there's some big present and you fly faster stronger get more points that's life you're running on some track you go left and right and you need to just grab coins all day long all these mitv all these opportunities Rael comes and tells you look at the ones who are flying on the fast lane and and get inspired so this wonderful powerful message of the Tor is coming and telling me between the words is that the jealousy prayer the battle the war the argument it's only to get the maximum out of you [Applause] [Music] [Applause] oh [Music]