Why Daven? by Rabbi Yossi Goldin

we're really going to go back to the basics why do we dve in um why do we dve in three times a day where does that come from the development of the sitter the text the N that we have many basic questions that are fundamental which some of it we might may be familiar with or pieces we're familiar with um and I really just to kind of take a step back and to really do a deep dive and and and the hope is that by understanding in a deeper way aspects of of doing it'll it'll enhance our doing on a on a day-to-day basis because of course that is the ultimate goal is not just to be able to learn Torah together but to use this as as a way to um to improve our overall our overall daving and what I'd like to do today we'll start this week and and continue next week is to really analyze a number of different approaches to the the basic question why do we dove in okay now um some of the ideas that we're going to discuss this week and next are are are are not new they might be ideas that you've you've thought of before uh had heard about before but I think it's important to in a in a in an organized way try to analyze a number of different approaches to the goal of the purpose of because when we understand the goal that hopefully will help us in in the actual Act of of of of daving of daving as well um of course this isn't an exhaustive list there many there might be aspects of F that we're not going to be able to capture um and of course they're also not mutually exclusive we're going to we're going to explore a few different approaches some of them overlap but the idea was to really kind of in an organized fashion try to understand and see some of the sources not just talk about to see some of the main sources discuss the uh the basis behind behind daving so today we're going to discuss two main approaches to why we DAV the first approach I think is the probably the simplest approach but at the same time there's actually a lot something new that I learned when I when I when I when I when I when I really uh prepar this Shure which is we dve in to ask things from hasem we dve in to receive things from okay perhaps the most basic type of is what we would call bakas bakas from the wordes means to request when we Davin one of the reasons why we are daving is we're requesting things from AOS we're asking things from him okay now on on on the one hand it's a little bit it's very it's a very simplistic approach to doing because it's basically looking at as if this is like a a quidd proquo I ask for something you give me I give you and and there's something overly simplistic about that about that relationship obviously when it comes to AOS at the same time that doesn't mean we have to minimize this aspect just because it is not the only aspect of daving doesn't mean we should minimize the importance of this aspect of ding because Basha which is request is is ultimately uh one of the main aspects of why of why of why we D for example Shon which is the main of our day it has three aspects to it it starts with what we call shevah we praise Hashem in the beginning of shon again we'll do this hopefully in more detail in in the future we'll go through the structure of the Shon to gain a better understanding but a basic breakdown is you have the beginning of which is called praising a you have the the main core of shim which is the requests that we ask from and then we end with thanks to and all three are important but there's no question that ultimately the main aspect of shon is the bakha because that relationship where we turn toh to request things is an important part of our relationship even if we don't want to you know put too much of a focus on that interestingly enough though when we get to some of the sources that we're going to see inside the idea of asking for things is a little bit deeper than we originally thought usually we think about asking for things from the idea would be that I want something Hashem hasn't decided whether to give it to me yet or he doesn't know or he doesn't want to and I'm going to ask for in hope to whether you want to call it change his will which is obviously an interesting philosophical question or change myself and there for through that change the the decree different ways to look at it but the idea would be that a hasn't decided as it were what to do and therefore my to ask the what the reason I'm asking is because I want him to almost give me something that maybe he wouldn't have given me otherwise but there's another aspect to Basha and that is as we're going to see in the sources today even things with which has already decided to give us even those things which have been decreed that they're going to come to us we still need to ask for them part of our relationship and part of the way the world has been said up is that even those things which are quote unquote meant to come to us through our wants us to ask for them and let's let's start we'll start with some of the sources Source number one is a gar and the gar discusses the following question may Source number one may what should a person do if he wants to become wise person wants to be wise like Solomon wise like wise like or just he wants to become smarter that he already is what should he do what you should do is you should learn sit down study and you'll become wise what do you mean what what what kind of question is that put in the work do the they responded there are a lot of people that tried to study and they didn't become that wise they didn't become that smart what you should do is you should request you should turn to please help me please help me in my studies please help me become smart please help me become wise as the POS says we see that is the one who gives the the wisdom from his mouth to the knowledge and understanding continues the we have it's a parable to a King you have a king who makes a suda for his servants and then he takes from what he has and the people who he especially likes people who he loves more he gives of what he has has the and when we create that relationship then then gives of his wisdom quote unquote to us to us as well okay so that's one way to be so there's two ways to become smart one is put in the work number two is to continues the what are you teaching me why do you mean I mean of course I have to turn to answers the gor no you need both the reason why it's mentioning it is because you need to both have the put in the work and you also need to turn to continues what happens if a person wants to become rich if a person wants wealth what should he do and then get get get involved in business he should be business he should be ethical and he should be honest in his business and if he does it correctly he'll be able to attain wealth there are a lot of people who were involved in business tried to become rich and were unsuccessful answers what should you do you should has is the source of all wealth that I have the money and I have the that's talking what is the teaching us that you can't have one and and not the other you need to have this relationship between what we would call you need to put in your work but ultimately a big piece to achieving the things we want to achieve whether it's wealth whether it's wisdom whatever and and this could apply to anything else any anything else on our list it needs to also be part of that is DAV yes said that there's something that already decid to give us we have to any way so what does that help us to know that because we will never know what decided correct it's a very good question and we're going to see soon when some of the sources discuss it what the purpose of it is again you're right we will never know but it's important for us to realize that the goal isn't simply me I think it's very important we talk about daving and especially we're talk about trying to connect to ding it's very important to be able to have different ways to connect to Ding and different approaches in our minds because you never know on a on a given day what might work for you and so when we're talking about when we're thinking about doing and okay today I'm going to do things that I want we have to recognize we're not just asking for the things that I that that I think Hashem might not want to give me or also this is my way to receive things this is this is this is this this is the way that I'm supposed to get what's what's meant to come to me and I think that knowledge and that understanding can impact us in our approach to daving so you're right we may never know what's what but it's important to know that those two tracks exist and we're not and that it's not like well whatever I have coming to me that's going to come anyway it's that even the things that are meant to come to me are meant to come through this process that we call that we call Fila and I think that it's that knowledge empowers Us in in in a certain way um okay so this gimar is clearly talking about that e that again it doesn't say the things that you're supposed to have or some things you're supposed to get but it says if you want to acquire things what what should you do you should have a dual a dual a dual plan which is you should work hard what we would call and of course you have to have and that he should give you that he should give you look at source number three explains how this works and this is again he's one of the people who really lays this out lays out the fundamental idea we're in Source number we're skipping Source number two for now one of the paths one of the ways that the ultimate wisdom which set up this is the most important line that in order for the cre cre creations the creatures us those who have been created to receive the shefa shefa means the flow to receive what wants to give us in order for us to receive that they have to awaken themselves turn to him and ask for it okay anything which we want which we're meant to receive from Hashem has to come through our requesting the more that a person awakens and develops and and asks of that from he creates a pathway to then be able to receive I guess the best one is actually Bounty the Bounty the amount that wants to give to him if you don't ask for it then you'll be more limited you're going to have less that's going to come to you because this Rel the relationship is such that you have to also request even those things which is planning on on giving we'll talk about why that might be but first understand that this is how they This Is How They explain it part of one of the most fundamental aspects of the of the philosophy of is is the ultimate good and he wants to give good to all of his creatures which means fundamentally Hashem wants to give us as much as possible it's almost as if it's like waiting there the goodness the which is what the ra describes is there waiting is there for us and it's waiting for us and because it's set up in a that we have to ask for it in order to receive it also established something called daving he created a he created a mechanism through which every single day created this thing called daving and commanded us to DAV so that that shef which is waiting to come we will be able to receive it by on a daily basis turning to a and asking for it now again you know how much are we supposed to get how much are we not supposed to get that's going to be is going to determine that based on various factors but the point is whatever good whatever shefa we're meant to receive will only come says the r if we actively ask for it okay now interestingly enough this idea uh is highlighted in a in in a different Kamar by the maharal in in in in a different gar and the gamar is is is talking about one a well-known story and sa for bous look at source number four there is a claw a rule that is established based on the story in the says if somebody doin for somebody else for something let's say a person doin for somebody else they should have a child okay for example and they themselves meaning R ruen is doing for Shimon that Shimon should have a child and it is also happens to be that ruin himself is in need of that same thing so we have a rule that ruin will get answered first okay where does that come from says the gamar where do we have this rule that if Ruan Davin for Shimon for something and Ruan happens to also have a need to have that he's going to get he's going to get uh answered first says the from the following story the story of a and El the Torah tells us that when when a and and and S had gone to guar had traveled to guar and aam had told s to say that that that she was his sister sister and Al took took s and then eventually and then and then and then it caused all sorts of problems so Al returned excuse me a returned sah to to Abraham and the Torah tells us that that a asked to DAV for him because he had been given some kind of a disease and the says and apparently the disease was an inability to have children okay so to and Hashem then cures a and his wife and therefore now because he has DAV for a a is now able to to have children okay and then soon after that we have the story of sah giving birth so says thear abah had D for a to be able to have kids AB himself was in need of that of that of that because he and his wife started been wanting to have kids for a long time and who ended up having children first Aram and Sarah and therefore we see from there that if a person doin for somebody else and he himself needs that Yeshua he's going to get it first the maim asked a fundamental question on this they say that's a very nice gamarra but something here doesn't fit in because there was something that happened before the story of aik what what happened before the we had three we had we had three malim who came to and S and what did they do they promised him he was going to have a kid so meaning the reason why AR had the kid wasn't because he D into a it was because he he had already been promised he was going to have a child even before the whole story of him daving for look at the toos says the toos K the Thea and what Abraham received wasn't the idea of of S getting pregnant and having a child that wasn't what he received from his because he was going to have that before he was already told that his wife was going to have a child they were already told that they were going to have a child so that can't be a Hashem answering a by giving him a child he was already told he was going to have a child rather what happened was says toos was that the that was given was that the birth was in a very was very peaceful andc it was an easy quote unquote easy very careful it's an easy birth an easy quote unquote birth okay the idea being that even though where where as they had already been promised they had already been promised that they were going to have a child but a DAV for that he should be able to have a child in an easy fashion and a therefore received that in return okay that's the that's toos the maharal asks the same question the Mahal says I don't understand they had already been promised they were going to have a child so then what does it mean that ab's Lord were answered first if he was already told he was going to have it this was some meaning this is our example of something which was already promised was already coming to Abraham so what was the purpose of him daving such that hiso were're answered answers the mar Source number six we're in the the beginning of the first of the line the fourth word the fourth word even though you're going to turn to me and say but what about the fact that he was already promised a child that's not really a difficulty the why when a person is meant to receive something he's already been promised that he's going to receive receive it he's already or it's already or another way of saying it's already been decreed in he's going to receive it you still need action to to to make it happen something is going to off was promised he's going to have a child okay but there still needed to be certain activity to to to to bring it to fruition God says he's going to give a person X Y and Z you still need to turn to and pray for it and ask for it in order to bring it down into this world you might deserve it a might have deserved it but it was only because a DAV for a that it then brought it into this world and made it and made it and made it happen and the the maharal continues by the way in this this idea in Source number seven with the following question yes please question ah so that I that I don't know no I mean I mean well see the the question is does the question well you're asking a very very important question question you're saying wait a second okay so if needed so turn all the events such so the answer is that obviously and this is again really beyond the scope of our conversation but obviously when we're talking about events in this world there's a balance between two fundamental ideas one fundamental idea is something the concept of which is personal free choice and everyone has free choice we also know that there's a certain concept of that there are certain things that will happen in the world to us two people that are that come from how that balance cares itself out is not something that is be is beyond definitely beyond the scope of our of our conversation and and and I think for many of us beyond our understanding so the answer is I don't I don't have an answer to you I don't I don't I think it's overly simplistic it would be overly simplistic to say oh yeah did this with and by the way there isn't there are people who take the opinion of and take it to a very very big which basically anything that happens to them now again sometimes to me in my opinion personal op it's a little bit overly simplicit because it takes takes out and takes away the responsibility and accountability of which is a fundamental part of who we are and a part of the way the world is run as well and and so it's a very good question um and and and and how to find that B I think it's a combination I think there was a combination here and this was you know event a chose to do this and ab chose to do that but it it the result was was was was was was was the way that it was now the maral in Source number seven continues this conversation and asks a very important question which is again a piece to what we've been discussing some people ask regarding the if I'm supposed to get what I'm supposed to get why ask for it what do I what do I have to say if it's GNA happen it's gonna happen why do I need to say give me sustenance if hasm is supposed to give it to me he is you know he's he's he's the he's he's he sounds like a fair guy right so he's going to give it to me and if I'm not supposed to have it that even if you asked for it would give it to you because you D now first of all I'm going to stop there for one second and say sometimes yes meaning moral isn't going to go with with this approach but there are approaches that will suggest that maybe yes that maybe in certain circumstances we can again so again well right exactly correct meaning we I so the answer so the moral is asking a question he's not going to go in this direction but one answer to this to this will be sometimes yes we might not fully understand how that's done does it mean that hasm changes his mind we don't understand what that mean does it mean we change and therefore there's there's different approaches and maybe one day we'll be able we'll have we'll have the opportunity to do a deep dive into that question because it's a very important philosophical question but I don't want I don't want to spend too much time on it now but that but so one answer would be yes sometimes our fer will change quote unquote K the will of God however we understand that but that's that's not the direction the maral is going to go the and then he asked another question even if we assume we need why do I need to say it with my words you know hasem knows what I'm thinking right God is the he knows what I'm thinking should be good enough to think about it he says this complicated Point has gone to the people then therefore question the whole idea of doing because they say well what is this you're doing because you believe does that mean you don't believe that God is Almighty right so the question again the the question is an important question there are a number of different approaches but the the mahar's question here is an important question number one why do I need to D whatever is going to give me he's going to give me anyway number two why do I need to verbalize it if Hashem knows what I'm thinking answers the mar the following idea says the says the the following idea he says that there is in in in in our relationship there is thees and then there is by definition a person who is a mes somebody who is request is somebody who's missing something something is missing you don't request something but even the fact that you're requesting and asking for something is an admission that I need something from you I'm missing something and and and I need you to what's called be to fill it and to give me what I what I am missing because by definition man does not have everything and he needs to be given what he's missing and therefore he turns to okay so therefore the f one fundamental idea that the maral is pointing out here is that by definition a somebody needs to request because he's recognizing that by requesting he is missing something and that is his way to achieve what he's missing it has to come through an actual request by do again I need to request and the and through that I will receive what I am meant to receive why does it have to be with speech he then says the following what makes a human human this is something we're going to talk about soon but the fundamental what what what distinguishes human beings from all other life forces it's our speech it's our ability to speak okay without that you're not really a human and therefore if you don't use your speech then you're not using the highest form of what you're capable of because somebody who is a or or receiver by definition needs to request what he is meant to receive and we need to activate that says the maral using the highest form of what we are capable of which is our our speech and therefore he ends therefore says we need to ask for it because by asking for it we're showing that we are missing something a and that b we need to create this pathway for us to receive it we are a m or as he also says a Mel a we turning ourselves into a receiver and by doing that we're also activating the highest level of who we are as creatures which is using the medium of speech yes sure sure sure excellent okay so now so your question is referring to the not to the source we just did but the gar we did before you're basically questioning if I understand correctly you're basically saying I don't understand we had a gor the gamor told us that if Ru DAV for Shimon for something and Ru himself needs it that ru's going to get get he's he's going to get answered first okay you're giving us a great example the bab rebbi who DAV for for for I would probably say hundreds of thousands of of people plenty of them many had many Were Meant to have children and he himself was not to have a child so how do we understand that GAR it doesn't seem to be accurate yes no I understand what you're saying I understand what you're saying so why didn't he so so first of all and this should be a disclaimer in general we talking about the of and things like that what all of those question there's always going to be examples of things we're going to be discussing general rules there's no question that we don't understand how the ways of the ways of the world and the ways of God and the individual situations and why this works and why that doesn't work and that and and we're not here to to try to suggest that we do that we think that we think we understand that meaning the way I would understand the gumar is as follows the way to understand that GAR is if ruin Davin for Shimon and ru self is meant to receive it he's going to get it first before shim meaning for whatever reason and I don't want to get into the details of the had decree that that was not what was meant to happen to he was not meant to receive that he was not meant to be blessed with with a child for what for whatever reason okay because the gamar we have to very careful about promises in the gamar the gamar isn't saying anyone who do is always for sure going to get this and that because we know we see that all the time as we say that things don't always happen literally the way that we understand it so the way I would I would have put an addendum on that GAR where again maybe I didn't I didn't expl explain it that way originally I didn't explain that way originally but I think the way I would say it is if Ru dav's for Shimon okay and that Shimon should have something and ruin himself is meant to receive it as well what the gar was just telling us that Ru will get it will get answered before Shimon gets answered it'll happen first okay so in this case A and S were due to have a child that had been promised to them and it was decreed and now therefore that's where they got it first but in there may be situations where I'm going to dove in for somebody that he should have something and I want it as well but I'm not going to get it because k for whatever reason no to me and there are so many different issues questions that are you know buum shal that are only up in heaven that we're never going to fully understand why this person gets gets answered this person does not get answered and those and those are those are things that are going to remain there but as much as we can we're trying to understand you know uh the principles yes doesn't it's what he doing for what he okay it's it's it's a very good question it's a very good question I don't know why why why why why the gamar brought that example it could also just be that chronologically that was the first that was the first place that was the first time where it happened U that would have been my initial thought let just uh you know um I don't know I don't know and you're right and there's lots of questions like that why they this example for I'm assuming there's more that we could learn from that story maybe it's to teach us what he do for it maybe to maybe to shed light on that story because maybe we don't understand it and again it's a gamar the gamar so so excellent so what you're raising is when and and this also obviously gets into a larger conversation which not going to spend too much time on that is what what we're discussing there is what's called a in the gar aad are atic stories in the gar which are similar to MIM okay the gar is made up of two different types of conversations generally there's the which is the main part of the gar and then there are the agatic stories which are no less important sometimes they're intertwined into theic discussions and sometimes you'll have a point where the gar will just like take a break for like three off and just go through various uh stories and and and and statements now is this meant to be taken literally it's similar to midashim and those of you who have ever studied with my father uh know my father feels very strongly about this and it's something that I've that I've learned from him when it comes to the world of mid we have to very very careful not every midash is meant to be taken literally some midashim are meant are were are stories of what actually occurred and some of them maybe didn't occur and they're just meant to teach us lessons and we may never know on a given okay I'll give give you the classic examp example most people if you were to ask them uh about the story of aam and the and and the furnace they would think they would be positive that it's written somewhere in the Torah that aam was went into the fire and he was saved and and all not there okay uh most people would think that the whole the whole story of aam and and the idols and and right not those stories are not in the Torah those are those are midashim now some of those MIM are midashim and some of them are AAS that come from garot they're similar types of ideas now does that mean did those stories actually happen they might have we have no idea we don't know whether they happened to whether they didn't many of the MIM did happen and many of them are not necessarily meant to be taken literally but rather to teach us lessons so here too as well it could very well be that this is the this is this is this is what happened and I see I mean and there's no reason to think otherwise although again other than just when it comes to or it could just be this this is meant to be and the is teaching us a lesson the simple understanding seems to be that it's that it's actually it's actually a story that happened because it's trying to learn a concept from it but again whenever you're dealing with aad you never know you never know for sure okay so what we've what we've seen so far again is we've been discussing this idea that one of the main reasons we dive in is to receive things from aosu both things that maybe we wouldn't have otherwise received and even things which aosu was going to give us anyway the our create a pathway or as the way the Ral called it a way for us to re to unlock that all of that Bounty that thatu wants to give us I brought for you here in Source number eight it's again it's a similar idea but it's just the language is very very interesting a comment by the the and he says it in a very very like um a bit of a Different Twist H says the source number eight Source number eight excuse me thank you Source number eight H when hasem wants to give something to man then a man needs to and needs to make himself able to receive that goodness fundamentally says the again his language is a little bit funny fundamentally God wants to give goodness to man God wants to give us things we have to therefore make ourselves what we called before a Mel a CLE that's willing and able to receive that goodness says says because fundamentally hasem always wants to give as the saying goes this is the famous statement in the G that more than more than a baby wants to suck the gamar the mother wants to feed the baby right there the the fundamentally a mother is full of a desire to give to her child even more than the child wants to receive from the mother says that's the same thing with more than we want to receive Hashem wants to give us and I think most of us would say the same thing about parents in general more than our children want from us I'm talk not talking about material pleasure but all of the things that we want to give we always want to give more to our children the question is are our children prepared to receive it and part of what fah does is it creates that pathway you could call it spiritually metaphysically you could call it emotionally for us to receive that goodness from because this is the Delight of when his Creations his creatures are able to receive this goodness from a now now we saw this idea by the way this idea that Hashem waits for us to ask for certain things we saw this a number of weeks ago and I I brought it here again there's a very interesting contradiction in this past week's para this past week's para we just began the Torah reading saer braus in par brus there seems to be a contradiction between twoim that the gar notes in Source number nine when God creates the trees and the vegetation the Torah tells us as follows Source number nine says let the land Sprout forth it should be grass that creates uh more seeds o and it should be a tree that creates other PR again there's a lot to talk about here but we're not going to get into it a zobo Al that will continue to sprout forth on the land V and then the Tor the P describes how again the vegetation was created the the vegetation sprouted forth later on in in per bet in the second per of saer bish the Torah tells us the following Source number 10 all of the bushes had yet grown on the ground and the grass had not yet grown why not says the Torah because God had not yet brought what rain it hadn't rained it can't grow if it doesn't rain and therefore says the Torah it hadn't yet rained and therefore the Torah and therefore the nothing grew there was no man to work the land and help and help things grow as the gar this is a steer this is a contradiction you just told us earlier that the that the vegetation had grown and now you're telling us that nothing had grown yet and look at source number 11 the garii asked the following question on the third day of creation it tells us that the that the that the ground sprouted forth but yet on AR shab it tells us that they hadn't yet grown so could you tell me on the one hand it did grow on the other it didn't grow answers the what happened the grass just started to grow the tiny little bit above ground had grown and it stopped it it basically had grown so it had grown a little bit and then it stopped why until came and Dav for the rain and the rain then came down and everything grew what this shows us is that desires the what happened here this was something that was meant to happen it had decreed that he was going to bring about the vegetation and yet it didn't just Sprout forth what happened it grew a little bit until what until Adam did what daved until he daved until he prayed created the world in a way where certain things were not going to come forth until until had for them even those things which were meant to receive even those things which are decreed to come to us said I want to wait until and as the Torah said sayses and I would argue it's not just but even as we see wants because that is part of how we are going to receive the things that we are going to receive Source number 12 of Shimon pinkis who was the Riva in and the Yesa in inim for many many years and died in a tragic car accident many many years ago he has a beautiful book called and he summarizes this point we've been saying until now this idea uh in the following in the following words Source number 12 explanation of of of everything there are two paths that a person can have in the fundamental of in order to receive something from from Heaven the first is what we're used to if a person needs something yeah and for some reason a person is meant to receive something and he hasn't yet gotten it a person hasn't yet gotten found a yet and he believes that he he's meant to have it but because of his action and his he hasn't gotten it yet so what's the purpose of the hope the hope is that through daving you can quote unquote whether we want to understand us change hashem's will change ourselves that we can change the reality and receive something which we were not necessarily meant to receive that's path number one and that's the way we usually understand the idea of bakas we're asking for things that hasm wasn't going to give us we're trying to somehow get them that's one path but there's another fundamental aspect and this is what the earlier sources all of the fundamentals for him WR about our is the door and the pathway to receive all of the Bountiful things that is meant to give us even if a person deserves and is meant to receive some type of and that goodness is there it's almost like waiting like like like like the grass at the it's like waiting for us to receive it the only way that a person will be able to receive those things is when he first doin for it that is what is about is that gate through which everything everything passes without using or accessing that what he calls the a person won't be able to receive what is what is coming it says we see from this is something fundamental nothing can be achieved without daving received without daving sorry it's the next page the second paragraph is on the next page and this is what has been established in the in the reality of the world from the six days of creation similar to that grass everything that we're meant to receive is going to like be standing there waiting for us on the on the at the entrance of the ground nothing will be received either in gash spir either in physicality or spirituality without man coming and watering that plant as it were or ding to Hashem to bring it out everything needs to pass through so this is the this is our first approach that we've been discussing this morning to doing we do in in order to receive things now here's the we haven't yet explored is why why would AES we' just established this is the wayes set up the world why would AES set up the world that if I'm supposed to receive something that I need to doin for it why not make it like like the maral originally asked if I'm supposed to get it I'll get it what what what now we what what what now we could just say spiritually this is the way set things up but what I want I think there's more to it let's try to understand what exactly we're trying to do yeah what what do you think the the goal what what are we gaining from this okay okay so what you're suggesting is it brings us closer meaning there are many other aspects that we gain from DAV which we're going to see that are all part of and therefore KES says I want to give this to you but in order for you to give it to me I want I want you to come to me and get everything else that you're going to get from that relationship if you're look at people how many are not you're not necessarily to findm True again I mean meaning in terms of I think I think what you're raising is the issue of how these things plays out on a practical sense in terms of you know people who get good things though they don't do and people who do do agree agree and those are questions that really that really fundamentally is the question of totic valo Russ vov which I don't which you know is I think Beyond meaning what we're trying to understand is the way things are set up and and how how it is that there are certain C that that there are certain that there are certain exceptions to that rule is something that I I you know I I agree as a question that I can't say I fully I fully I fully understand but I think the idea here is what you're suggesting is is that there's so much that's accomplished through the through the process of that is almost saying if you want to be able to receive the things I'm going to give you I want you to come to me and develop develop develop the relationship up in the the first thing we say correct correct correct agreed agreed agreed I'm just going to yeah I I saw there was another raise your hand I'll get get to you yes I think that what we see from what you said previously andab to show to demonstrate to articulate that we rely on him to demon excellent I would say I I I would say it even a little bit differently but I think it's the same idea the same idea which is the follow which is the following idea very often I I think I use this mus last time I let's say let's say I have a I have a gift that I want to give my my my children for whatever whatever reason it is I'd much rather there's two ways I can give it to them I could either just go one walk walk in one morning and and just give it to them or I could wait until they ask for it and then give it to them why would I much rather the latter than the than the former they take action they take action excellent number one they take action what else happens when they take action when they ask for something they want it they want it which means what happens when they get it they appreciate it much more right if I walk in I say hey take this leg whatever whatever it's going to be then they'll be like oh that's cool but then very but it but if they feel and I think this is what the maharal was talk about somebody feeling if you feel the if you feel that you're Miss Miss in something such that you ask for it and then afterwards you receive it you're going to appreciate it much more so I think from a psychological perspective there's something very very important here in addition to what you're suggesting which is part of us why wants us to ask is because when we ask then we continue to show that this is something that that's important yes one other comment and then I want to move on yes of course look you're you're you're you're not creating the question and you're ask the question is a fair point and a fair question you can have conversations about Fila and daving without ever having the the idea of what do you want to call r or the world of hash and God's intervention versus the balance of and these are all excellent excellent questions and they're going to come up naturally in any conversation about Fila the I the one thing that I would say which I said before is that to me those are questions that are important questions I can't say that I have I have enough of an answer to really say something intelligent more than I think most of us have right now meaning I think that these are issues and these are again people more than me have said that the r has said that these are questions that you know are are bu the issue of why is it that a certain great Rabbi would have somebody and then he would have a tragedy like that these are questions we can't answer we're we're living in a world right now just this just the last two weeks that we've been what we we what we've been experiencing what the world has been experiencing a year but the last two weeks the amount of fathers of fathers of so many how how many orphans are we in the LA we in the last week and a half obviously doesn't stay away from everything else before then we don't have answers to these questions so ex so excellent it's a good question I I so again so the way the way I the way I would approach this is I'm I I specifically didn't want to approach this from a more theological and philosophical perspective because I think that that's a conversation that not everyone is comfortable having it's a different type of conversation and I and I and I honestly personally am not a philosopher and I don't necessarily feel equipped to be able to give you something that I think you would have been able to get from so so I didn't want to bring it to that place not because it's not an important question but because don't it it they're they're all very very good questions I think our our goal is to try to see the fundamentals and what I would call the rules the basic rules that Kaza lay out are there exceptions to all of those rules there absolutely are how do all those rules apply to each of us individually there's going to be ways that they do in ways that they don't and and I'm not I'm not I'm not trying to you know skim the question or sidestep the question but I think that our job is to try to connect to some of these rules and then we also have to deal with those questions in real ways I just don't necessarily know that this is the proper format to to to to do that and that's why you know it's a very very good question I'm just kind of laying out what I believe from kazal and from the different sources are different reasons for what who wants us to do why certain things do happen or don't happen is a very good question that I you know I can't say that I have a full I have a full grasp on okay yeah sorry one one other comment and then then just because of time if you had a perfect system where things work just the way you want them to work you would take out yeah I I I mean correct correct there's going to Bean meaning there's also there's also there's we call Tor and then there's T there's there's understanding the Torah in the way that it is and then there're seeing how it plays itself out in real in real life and there's so many factors here at play right just just simply the question of versus is such a such an important question that we all struggle with and that and that all of the great rabbis struggle to find the balance in answering that question and therefore I you know I'm hesitant to to to St to step into that question because I think it's something that's very very there's a whole there's a whole range of opinions how much of this how much of what happens in the world is due to our free choice or the free choice of those around us versus how much of it is due to deciding X Y and Z is going to happen the answer is it's a balance of the two how you find that balance and where those B where that balance lies is very very hard to hard to answer and and I and I and and therefore I don't I don't feel comfortable you know really being able to give you a proper answer on that but there's no question that there's always going to be a difference between what we're seeing in in in in the text and how it plays itself out in real life the hope is that by seeing it in the text it can then inform us make us thoughtful about these things and be able to then connect to it in a deeper way even if sometimes we see questions that come up that we have that we have we have trouble we have trouble answering I hope that I hope that that answers even though I you know I understand where I I when I Was preparing this I thought to myself this is probably going to go in that direction and I understand why um like I said it's such it's such a it's such a you know how many people have spent years and years of their lives searching this question and have not been able to come up with a with with with the real and the answer is the way I look at that is that there's just certain things in life that I just I don't fully understand and therefore I try to look to the sources to be able to gain what ever understanding I can but not necessarily and do my best to strengthen myself to not let those questions prevent me from you know from from continuing to do to do what I can do okay I'm just going to stop just simply because we're already we're going to end in two minutes we're not gonna we're gonna we're gonna have to do SE um the approach number two next week but what I'd like to just just just to give a preview the second approach that we're going to explore for why we dve in which again is obvious but it it it it needs to be stated is the reason we DAV is simply to connect to a one of the goals ofil is to take us out of this physical world around us the world that we live in and to connect to to spirituality and the First Source for this and we we'll just we'll just do this Source today and then with that we'll stop and give you a break before before the next year is From safer braus when when when Leia names her second when not her second son sorry not Leia this is Source numberers this is Source number 13 Source number 13 Leia names her son naali Source number 13 Rashi quotes what does naali mean it says na Elohim says that says says Rashi he quotes that the word comes from the word a connector it means some kind of a connection that from Hashem I have connected and I have become integrated with my sister through having children what that what we see from this from this from this rash is that the word which is connected again to the word is on some fundamental level the concept of what is about connection it's about connection it's about about between Heaven and Earth between this world and the world above and about between the between us and what we're going to see next week uh is is to to see more of the sources as to how that plays itself out it's amazing to see different sources different great GM discuss the same concept and yet come at it from different angles the way Sal talks about it versus the ABR jski talks about it versus the way the or talk about it each of them enlightening this concept of connection but fundamentally is about connecting with the almighty connecting with something greater than ourselves um so be we we'll do that next week wishing everybody a wonderful wonderful week [Music]