Tehillim Chapter 130: Chizuk During Iron Sword by Rabbi David Walk

okay good morning everyone thank you all for joining this morning um I I want to learn Psalm 130 klid one of the 15 Sher hamalot songs of ascent but um before I get into the poem I just want to share one one thing with you uh which hadn't been my plan when I when I arranged with Sam uh Rabbi Shaw to get this slot yesterday I I went up north um to visit my son um my son's in Golani and he was on the um the Lebanese border but a couple of days he had a very minor injury he pulled a hamstring so they sent him back to Amad M Amad which is uh right near Roosa directly below spat so I went there and it was it was really wonderful I went with my wife Rifka and uh it was 2 and a half hour drive we get there and Huda said can we take a friend with us to lunch which of course I said yes he said if another guy has to go to a dentist so uh so it was it felt like here I am I'm helping I'm taking this guy to the dentist even though I hate to be I hate to be part of the Dentistry profession because I'm afraid of dentists but anyways um but and he was so thankful and was so wonderful the most amazing feeling besides just hugging my son and and you know and and knowing that he Sav and and all of that but the most amazing thing was it feels different up there back here in youram especially this week last week there were all the funerals and I I went to I went to two and I went to a couple of Shivers this week it really feels she gr it really feels normal uh you know and maybe the traffics down a little bit some of the cafes are closed on Derek B leim um but it feels pretty normal and then you go up there a majority of the people you see Are Soldiers there are tanks on the side of the road a large percentage of the traffic on fish tiim that's the trans Israel Highway goes from Matula in the north to aot in the South the the main traffic on on Route 90 are military vehicles uh jeeps and uh Earth movers that are going up to set up positions in the North and it's just a different feeling and then I come back to yusim and and I go to Minion this morning and I almost feel guilty um because we're we're it's shra I mean it's like so normal for us but we can't forget what's going on on the border of Gaza of you know of uh ruat AA and on the Lebanese border we can't forget we have to continually watch the news and pay attention and uh it's only when you really see and feel and understand uh the danger that our young men are in that we can really say these toim with the proper Cav and uh it was just it was just eye opening you know I I went there almost like it was a t and by time we're halfway through brashem it felt more like a mission and uh we got home and felt mission accomplished uh the guy got his filling okay having said that let's let's take a look at KL um Psalm Ked 130 is most people don't even know the number they say the the song of of David this the song of a sense out of the depths the poem starts immediately with an anomaly it's almost a contradiction here is a song of a sense these were the poems that Jew sang on their way up toim these are the songs that the levim sang on the 15 Steps going from the outer Courtyard to the inner Azar the inner Courtyard we're we're supposed to feel we're ascending we're getting closer and closer to Hashem and then D starts the poem I want to ascend but I'm in the abyss I don't know how I can get from point A where I am to point B the BET mikdash where I want to be and it's just that jarring difference between the title of the poem and the beginning of the poem that right away gets us into the mood something difficult is going on in the poet I'm assuming David aik's life we have no idea what the problem is many mam have tried to talk about what this is what this is discussing some people say it's yose sadik it was Joseph when he was in prison in um in Egypt because when he comes out of prison if they said he bring him up from the boore from the pit which is you know a depth it's not just a prison was probably Underground so some people say it means that a lot of maor say that the term m makim means the ocean so this may mean a sailor who returned home after a difficult Voyage some people say it's a reference to Yona when he was in the belly of the whale um I just think it means depression someone is in the deep dark pit of depression the word depression means to be low a depression is a lower place out of the depths of my emotional depth I call out to you Hashem and I beg Hashem God please hear my voice let your ears pay very close attention uh again that I'm I'm going back to my my time in the military here when I was uh in the I was not like these soldiers I I looked at these soldiers and said wow these guys are ready I I went in schl I went into the arm I was 37 I never became what these guys are uh up north um but you know one of the terms in the Army right away is aave listen up pay attention and we're turning to Hashem and saying hash please pay attention to me listen to my plea your your you know your of course God doesn't have ears but your assumed faculties to hear please pay attention to the sound the voice the words the Deep emotion of my of of my supp ation translation in front of me uh attended to my plea for Mercy plea for Mercy is JPS and Rabbi uh Professor alter um my plea but supplication a begging it's different than a a is a communication aim is is literally I'm on my hands and knees I know I don't deserve this we learn this from from mosu the it's a prayer that I really don't feel I have the right to ask for but I'm going to do it anyways just like mosha rabenu who said to hasem I know I don't have the right to ask again to get into I give you my I give you my supplication my begging we're asking to please listen to that a if God if you pay attention to all of my sins Hashem m l Lord Hashem God who will be able to stand up who can survive all of us all of us have merits and demerits however most of us can remember the demerits quite often more they they they stick out more than than the merits and those are if those you pay attention to all the things I've done wrong who can survive I need your mercy now this line is the reason that we recite this poem at the beginning of cre on rash it's a major part of that transition from the Su the early poems to the blessings over kma when we have that big break in the dining before we get ready to do the the more heavy lifting of the prayer service we say this Psalm and we're saying please God listen to me because I know I don't have enough merits to be here I am dependent upon your mercy and so we've placed it there and there is amongst historians an idea that before in the early middle a we started saying on the first night of Yip they used to recite this poem then that they started Yip not with but with with which is very appropriate and then it says for yours and you alone is the power to forgive there is no forgiveness in this world like yours I know I go to everybody that I may have uh I I may have bothered along the way and I ask them to please to please forgive me but the ultimate forgiveness it belongs to a kades he who controls our our Eternal fate so with you is the power of forgiveness so that we hold you in awe in fear we fear you not not because we can ignore you we fear you because we know how much we need this forgiveness Rabbi Sachs commented on that line who inspires deeper fear one who rejects us or one who refuses to reject us one who rejects us makes no more demands upon us we can go our merry way but one who refuses to reject us never losing faith in us and refusing to let go of our Eternal bond that is the one capital O we fear not because we fear him but because ultimately we fear ourselves we fear greatness we fear that we're not worthy that's the great fear we have tremendous faith in but not enough in ourselves that's the beginning the first four first half first four sukim first half of the poem the second half of the poem is very different the first half of the poem is is about being in the depths being despondent almost but not quite having given up hope the second half of the poem is a very different feeling sense Vibe if you will where we have expectations we're waiting for something we know that something is coming yeah one of my one of my favorite uh musicals was uh was Westside Story from the days before I was a diti and there's a song called tonight and in that song you hear this couple who are fallen in love talking about expectations for what's coming and fear about it arriving now of course ultimately this play is Romeo and Juliet and is a uh and is a tragedy um but we don't know that when they're singing tonight tonight tonight won't be like any other night tonight we're expecting something I can't wait for tonight um and that's what's happening laav many many of what's Happening Here in the second part of the poem the person the poet David let's assume has expectations so first I'm in trouble and I know only you can save me only you can forgive me and therefore give me hope and then comes the second part of the poem which begins with one of my favorite Hebrew words K Hashem I have hope in you now why do I love this word I mean we're all I hope we're all zionists so we all all knowva the hope but I have actually two grandsons who were named kave um and and you know and we have great hopes for both of them both the one living here in tcoa and the one living in Seattle Washington um and the it's a it's a beautiful name and our children and grandchildren they are our tikv so it's so wonderful to have grandchildren whose actual name is C hope faith I have this expectation this Hope Oh God my very Soul hopes for this it's a hope it's an expectation H Hal and I have I I have I have hope for your word and then I expected what's the difference between Kiti and H now there is a as probably all of you know there is a uh a tradition amongst um traditional Scholars of Tanakh that Biblical Hebrew does not have any synonyms so if two words are used it's because they have different gradation shadings of meaning so what's the difference between Kiti and HTI when uh very much you could translate them into English the exact same way uh uh I hope for the for the Lord my being hoped and for his word I waited okay hope and wait that's uh Professor alter in the JPS I look to the word to the Lord I await his word okay what I think the difference between the two words is Kiti is hoping and waiting pining for something but it could feel very very much like waiting for gdau that famous Samuel Becket play where the you know they're just saying oh gdau is coming gdo is coming and he never does a and and for generations for Millennia Jews felt that way we had these we had these waiting hopings and it just didn't happen until us we are the beginning of the fruition of that hope HTI doesn't mean just waiting and hoping HTI is a confident expectation so let's look at the verse again hasem I'm hoping I'm pining God my very soul my very being has this hope but I have an imminent expectation for the Lord's word for his word that it will come true it will happen so that difference in the gradation is is is very beautiful so the despondency of the first paragraph is already broken it's like the clouds have cleared a little bit and we say but I really expect it I really know it's going to happen I can feel it in my bones and in my nephesh my my soul my very being ah my soul is for you Hashem M sh very difficult verse to translate and I had no idea what this verse meant I'm going to read three translations of it okay uh the first one is uh is Rabbi saxs okay my Saul waits for the Lord more than the Watchmen waiting for the morning more than the Watchmen waiting for the morning it's just repetition at the end and Rabbi saaks put in the verb Waits the verb Waits is not there in the Hebrew that's why I first translated okay my soul is for the Lord because you know the the verb to be can be in Hebrew without it being there okay this is uh Professor alter I hoped for the Lord again he's putting in the verb hoped okay uh oh no this is the previous verse I apologize I hope for the Lord my being hoped and for his word I waited my being for the Lord my being for the Lord uh Professor alter noticed there's no verb there so he can't throw it in more than the dawn Watchers wait for the dawn okay now JPS I am more eager for the Lord than Watchmen for the morning Watchmen for the morning okay I never understood this verse and I had trouble trying to parse exactly what I told you and that was until 1983 1983 for the first time I I started Living in a settlement called the elazar mosab elazar in gusion then there were 22 families there I mean today it's a beautiful really terrific Community uh that's many hundreds of families um but um then it was uh not so successful um MOS shui and I was there as a dorm counselor for RAB Riskin and Rabbi brav and the yes miar moved out there um in 1984 1983 there was a smaller program for rber Riskin and because I lived on the moshav I did guard Duty for the first time in my life I had never touched a weapon till I made Aliyah then they taught me how to fire uh and Uzi um and I did guard Duty and I felt that last shift guard Duty just like in biblical times is usually three watches for the night the first watch was from um was from around 10ish till around 1 then 1 till about three maybe four and then from 4 3:30 to 4ish Till Dawn that last that last watch boy do you really want that sun to rise it's like you're a little bit afraid you're walking all by yourself around this fence this perimeter and and you know there's there are lights periodically on the fence but out there is is the dark and especially at the beginning I I I was scared the every time I did it it was twice a month uh and I just couldn't wait this the sunrise couldn't happen fast enough because I I was afraid and anxious and that's what this poem is is drawing into people before Edison waited for the sunrise very very impatiently because the night is dark and scary all of us go through periods in life which are dark and scary our Medina is right now in a dark and scary time so what are we doing we're waiting for the dawn we're like those let's read the line again okay my soul is yours it's for God more than those Watchers of the night for the morning sh we are waiting for the morning we can't wait god with this expectation you you know the when we when I went in the Army in 87 we did some exercises they were not serious but they did something that reminds me of what's going on now they would give us an order to get to a certain place and then on purpose we would have to sit there for sometimes hours waiting for the next order the worst part for our soldiers whether it's by ruat AA by the Gaza Strip or it's by the Lebanese border the worst thing it's that waiting you just don't know when the shoe's going to drop and you're just sitting there with these expectations you don't know what to expect you don't know what's going to happen you just want something to happen the waiting is so difficult and painful and that's what we're going through right now on both borders hopefully on the the southern border it's something that's going to happen imminently and be done with hopefully on the northern border we're hoping for nothing hopefully that that's just going to you know we're just going to go home and say no you know nothing's going to happen Okay is elhem now this is the word back from uh from verse five it's again the expectation Israel has expectations anticipation for something from you Hashem because God has now my translation in front of me says steadfast love um um with the Lord is standfast kindness Rabbi Sach said um said where is it uh there is loving kindness okay um because with God there is loving kindness okay what's loving kindness there's ra this this a lot of these words that we use all the time what's the difference ra is compassion or empathy Love Is Love that's a long discussion is a gift that you don't necessarily deserve we have this hope and expectation that a kades is going to give us more than we deserve we begged before and we have a track record with kades in the days of tanak yeah not so much in the last 2,000 years uh that who pays in such a way and helps in such a way that we get more than we deserve and we have that expectation and great is his power to redeem now I I we have two words in Hebrew for Redemption and you know them both one is G that word doesn't appear here the other word is Le out to redeem like ponen what's the difference between between them again Biblical Hebrew we can't have synonyms I'm going to ask you to wait about five minutes and then we're going to talk about that term is and he will redeem Israel from all of their Aon all of their iniquities sins and Aon is a is a a worst sin it's a sin done on purpose as opposed to a which is sin done by mistake okay I didn't know that that was you know that that was milking right after I ate my uh you know my hamburger okay I didn't know then you told me oh that's a aone is I knew it was tra and I ate it anyways that's aone it's worse okay so we can understand how this poem would be used on Yip during the to do want to awaken us to we want hashem's forgiveness go back with me for just one second [Music] um we said in uh verse five I I have this waiting I'm waiting I'm waiting what am I waiting for I'm waiting for God's word which word inot in the literal meaning of this poem what word am I waiting for R salic said the word that we're waiting for is Sal I have forgiven you that is the literal meaning of this poem that this person feels down in the dumps because he doesn't believe that God will forgive him for all the terrible things that he has done he just feels this this guilt that puts him into this depression that's an abyss like being in a dungeon and then we say here I'm waiting for the word the r actually said the most famous of the we say on Yip night is is sung by the Kazan and we sing it with him but it ends with the word Sal I have forgiven you and that's the word we're waiting for and that poem remember they used to say they used to say this Psalm at the beginning of of yam kipor night so the answer to I'm waiting is in the in the poem that we recite later in the night we're not waiting for the word salak we're waiting for the word yeshu ATI my victory my salvation that's when we read this when we did this you're going to redeem us from all of our sins and you're going to say what word to us Yeshua you have my salvation you have my victory it is all going to work out fine so what about the word pep which again you know figures here call it's so fascinating how repetitious this little poem is the difference between Gula and Pon is um is very simple to explain but not so pleasant to experience in Gula Ines I'm gonna I'm gonna quote myself a few years back I I wrote on this the psalm ends with the logical extension of the faith that we have expressed God will redeem his Israel for all its transgressions that's we just said in verse eight but with this exuberant admission comes a caveat the term used for redeem is POD not goel the difference according to the malim is crucial pidion means that there is a price extracted for the Redemption just like PID you have to pay you have to pay for the Redemption okay you buy it do quite often means we say Pim and right now we have we have captives but you usually have to pay a ransom to get them back so pidong means a Redemption with with a price paid we have never lost our total faith in the final and complete Redemption but our poet also recognizes that our people have suffered greatly along this path so what I have been thinking about as we recite this poem after doing in in my minion this is one of the two poems that we we say regularly is Hashem we've already paid enough now please it's time for the Redemption and CLA isrel in the last uh the last two weeks has has paid a very high price and uh I hope and I pray that a Kadesh agrees with us that we have earned our Pon and that it should come very very speedily thank you all