Good Judgment and bad Judgmentalism | Rabbi Anthony Manning | June 3 2026

Thank you, Josh. Thank you for those announcements. Um, and good morning everybody. Welcome everybody. Thank you for coming. It's great to see you. Uh, I'd like to thank our sponsors for the Shirim. The Wednesday morning sharim here in Rakavia are dedicated for the academic year Daniel Benavid and Li Bas Ara Strauss and Modai Ben Mosha and Risel Raisel Bas Marcus parents of Judy and Manakim Marcus and the Shia is sponsored my Shia is sponsored for the full academic year Brandit and Zelig Ben Calman Shalom. Now we are in a series of shirim dealing with bayo issues but those which have a broader theme. We looked at the issue of kav habriot kavriot last week of d human dignity. We've looked at the issue of yashar of doing the right thing. Today I want to look at an issue which bothers everybody uh certainly under the age of 40 it seems to me today is that everyone feels that they're being judged. Don't judge me. You're judging me. It's none of your business. Uh, and we have a lot to say about this because I think that that's an old topic which is still very relevant. And on the one hand, we all know that there's a mitzvah not to judge other people. You're not meant to be judgmental. We'll see where that comes from. On the other hand, the Torah says, "Judge your friend." It says, "Judge your friend fairly, but but you're meant to be a judge of some kind." So, when are you judging? When are we not judging? How does that work? Uh, it's a fun share. Lots of really interesting topics. Quite a lot to get through. Let's start with the prohibition that we're not meant to be judging other people and see how that applies. So, let's look at number one. Starts in don't be so confident that you're doing great until the day you die. If you've kept it up, then fine. But everything other than that is a work in progress. We are all a work in progress. We'll get back to in a few minutes. And then it says, "And do not judge your friend until you reach their place." What does that mean? Don't judge your friend till you reach their place. So let's look at a couple of ways of understanding that number two. If you see your friend with a challenge in life which they failed, they failed that challenge. Don't judge them negatively until you've gone through the same challenge and you've been successful. How do you know? Maybe you'd have done worse than they did. You're judging them. You've never been through that. are you may say wow no I have been through that challenge and I succeeded so we'll see good but you've never been them and been through that challenge you've been you and be through that challenge so don't be too quick to judge other people number three a little bit more on this don't say to yourself if I were in their place I wouldn't do those bad things I wouldn't act like they act look at how they act I'd never act like You don't really know. You have your own ters. Everyone has a yates. Well, you're walking around like a malik. You have no yates. You also we also have a yates. You don't know exactly how you'd have fared. Maybe you'd have also been tempted. May you have also given in. [snorts] and and he adds this point I added when you get into their situation on their level being who they are then then you can start to think about judging how they were but until you are in their place on their level in the same situation then you can't the miri goes even further the fascinating miri number four and he makes two separate points with both of which are very contemporary so he says as follows he's in the 14th century. Number four, don't judge other people to even in their place. If you see them do something wrong because of the very circumstances that led into that and the breach that he caused, he she he or she wasn't able to to deal with it. Don't judge them negatively. What does that mean? Gomorra. And here he makes a very important point which we're going to get to. Okay, they did something wrong. That doesn't make them a Russia gour. Everybody's quick to say, "Oh, he's a Russia. She's a Russia." No, that's not what happened here. Maybe they did do something wrong. Maybe you would have done better than them. But that doesn't make them a Russia. I mean, it's not personal. Because sometimes, you know something, people lose it. People can't help it. Sometimes people just aren't able to that's they're not a Russia. They're just a human being. Okay, maybe they should have tried harder, but you can't always win. Maybe even you if that would have happened to you. You wouldn't have been able to control yourself either. Not everybody can withstand uh you know I can resist everything but temptation. Was that the Oscar Wild or one of those people? Okay, fine. Mark Twain I think. Okay. to perhale and he brings an example from perh the the gadas in perh if you remember the story raashi is teaching over certain and he's going to he's going to deal with manasha the king manasha manasha who was a rasha came to him in a dream and raashi asked him a shila and rather he asked ravashi ai shila and ravashi didn't know the answer manashi gave him the answer and ravashi in the dream turns around to manasha hame from back from the the Christian and says if you're such a big how could how come you were such a big Russia and manasha answers him in the dream you know why I went to do a vodora if you'd been in that generation you would have lifted up your cloak and you would have run after me you have no idea what it felt like to be tempted by a vodor you're just not in the same place you don't have that yet as we You know the the temptation for a zora was to a large degree taken away at the end of the first temple beginning of the second temple and manasha lived at a time he says you can't judge me you don't know how it felt if you would have been there you'd have been running to do that of odor it's very true do not judge your friend make sure you've been in the same place like them and you've succeeded and then maybe you can think more or even more so if they've been forced to do something and that was of course very relevant because there were people who were forced into conversions which is a person has to die God forbid rather than convert to Christianity for sure and he says don't be so quick to judge people who did convert to Christianity and this was a reality at his time an increasing reality at his time because they were in they were forced you don't know how you could have done not everybody can stand up to them and then at the end of this piece he gives a very interesting which he's heard from his rabbis which is very interesting and I have some rabbis who explained to me as follows don't judge a friend your friend until you've been in her place what does that mean if you see a strange new person in your town and you look at They look like a person. They look like a really put together person. Very nicely presented. Don't be too quick, goes the other way as well, to assume, well, yeah, there must be a great person of a guy. Don't be too quick to assume that until you go to their place. What is that place? Shahb. Go to his home. Go to his town. See what they think of him. Meaning all sorts of people breeze into town looking like people. It's very easy to fake it. Yeah. To walk the walk, to talk the talk. And people think you're a hash of a person. He says, "No, no, no, no. A lot of people who are like that, they're real fakers. Go back to his town. Go see how he go see how he talks to his children. Go see how he talks to his wife. go see what he does when nobody else is looking and see how he behaves when when he's when he's in his you know private place and see if you agree with him there. Don't look at how he is when he puts himself out to other people. And then you can if he really is a person then you can say he is there are lots of low lives. He says and real you know not great people and they and they push out their trotters like the pig who says look how kosher I am. I've got split hooves and when they go to a new place they dress up and they put on the actimos and they're fakeim. It doesn't mean in the modern sense but meaning there's a lot of fake people around. So it's funny he he puts it in both directions. When you see people who mess up don't be too quick to say I'd never do that. When you see people who look great don't be too quick because there are a lot of fake people out there. One can't think that they had but think that they had some experience of this in life. As you go through life, you realize not everybody unfortunately is what they seen. The sworno even brings yan and coad was and then at the end of his life as an old man, he went off the derek becomes a sad number four. Number five, don't be too quick until you know what he was really facing. Even the Cohen doll, nobody is beyond that kind of uh potential. Everybody, even Yohan and Kodor could lose it. And the Maginavot brings a beautiful midrash which is not so often quoted of Schloame sleeping in and and missing the opening the inauguration of the Ba Mikdash. Very interesting. Look with number six. Don't judge your friend until you reach their place. When finished off the mdash, he put the keys. He put the keys under his pillow. His intention was to bounce out of bed before light early in the morning. Okay. And he's going to be the first one there leading the charge in the new Bikdash. the king's going to be. He even had the keys so he could get in before anyone else was awake and his uh lovely but not so lovely wife who he was married to which was never a good idea. What did she do? She put sets up something on his over his uh over his bed with star signs and this is to kind of fool him. I don't know exactly what this was. Whether it made him think it was still nighttime or whether it was some kind of I don't know Netflix subscription that she's got on the roof and he's there, you know, sleeping the night away watching binge watching the latest movies or or the equivalent of okay because she just wants to be in bed with him. She's got her evil ways to to please and it was 10:00 in the morning before he even got up and he missed the completely. Totally the king. What did he gathered together for was from his tribe? He goes bang banging on the door of the king. Look at you. Who do you think you are? Came out said to him said to him, "Russia, what an evil person you are. You look what you're going to do in the future. You're going to build a whole zor. You're going to stop all the basis from coming and you're going to do it on purpose and you blame him because he slept in. I mean, he's the king. He should have got up on time. He should have said, "Nevertheless, anyone could people make mistakes. Even great people make mistakes when Ephraim rather when spoke with a great passion." Okay. What was that for? went and the whole they became and here everyone became guilty because of the bal meaning the indignity the the indignation not the indignity the indignation that feels is too quick to be like that there are two people who are too quick to complain about everything how can this be and how can you do this etc etc this midrash could apply to pretty much any shul board of management uh in history um that people are so quick to judge the people in charge. How could you let that happen? How could this be? How could that be? And these people would not only not do as well, but they'd often do worse. That's a very interesting medish that uh that gives a little bit of a pak to Schlomma. Okay, he didn't do the right thing. No one's justifying that he did had a lane in the morning with his favorite Egyptian wife. But nevertheless, uh stuff happens. Ravnakman of Brelaf says why little number seven. Very interesting. A little bit of Rabbi Nakman. We don't get that enough in this when a person sits down and starts talking about other people. This is a moment of rash. You've put the spotlight on that person. You've decided to speak about that person. That's like a rash. It's the you are now sitting in judgment on your friend. You have to be so careful about this. Look at yourself. Hate it really well. Are you are you the right one to be the who is the judge on Rashashana? >> Hashem. What a you have put yourself on the throne of judgment to be the the the the dian to judge the Jewish people. Only does this does that. God judges the Jewish people. Wasn't what arrogance. Only is allowed to judge. Not you. Who could be in the mock of their friend? Only Hashem. Very interesting. Hashem is Hashem is the place. God, God, the world exists within God. God is the Mak. God doesn't exist within the world. That's a very interesting philosophical idea, but that's not why he's bringing it. Is a reference to Hashem here. Only can judge a person. That's what we say by the way. If it's a person who's sick, meaning we we don't get involved in we don't know why things happen or what people did, etc. knows everything. Just to underline this section says as follows. You have to feel so much You want to judge another person, you have to feel such a sense of connection to that person, love for that person. It's as if you're talking to yourself. That's what it means till you reach their place. Before you judge anyone else, put yourself right in that place and say, "Could I ever be judged about something like that?" He was sitting on the bench there being accused with him. So I think it's very clear just to underline this section that we're never ever ever allowed to judge other people for things they did personally because who knows what you would have done what I would have done is the true judge and therefore we we we're not allowed to be judgmental. It's very very hard because we're all very judgy what people are wearing, what people are saying, especially clothes. You know, one of one of the one of the uh and it works not just women, men, whatever. One of the painful things about sneeers as a topic and I wrote about this in the book that I wrote about sneezers is because it carries with it this problem constantly. It's not just people are commenting upon what people are wearing. It's people are judging based on and people don't only judge the person. People judge a whole segment of the Jewish people. People don't look at a piece of clothing and say, "Well, I mean, men and women, usually women, I can't wear that. It looks it's too long. It's too short. It's not cut right." They say, "I can't jud wear that. It's so bas." Whoa. You've just used this opportunity to undermine an entire segment of the Jewish people. Who Who you going to ask for? You're going to go around every base of school and and ask for say you don't like it because it makes you look frumpy. It makes you look this. It makes you look that. Say what you like, but don't say I can't wear that. It's too modern. Modern. I I when I was growing up, MODERN WAS A POSITIVE WORD. Who didn't want to be modern? You want to be old-fashioned? Modern was great. Now you can't even use the word in in in in uh in um when you're advertising or publicity material. You can't say, "Come and see our new modern-based medish." You know, no, it can't be modern. Modern is just a passive aggressive word that people think they're being polite, but they're really putting down an entire group of the Jewish people. Oh, that's too modern. And they make out, look, I'm not judging. I'm just saying he was more modern than me. Of course, you're judging. You're judging completely. Okay? So, we are very uh very much in need of on this issue. So, that's part one. Part two though is the issue. When you need to judge, look at number nine. Mishbat. It sounds like he's talking to a judge. Do not uh corrupt judgmental. Do not favor the weak. You feel sorry for them. Oh, okay. He gamed because he he's poor. No, you can't do that. And don't give favor to the the wealthy, the mighty, the people who are important, the people. No. No. You have to be completely fair. Judge your friend fairly. Justly. justly. It's interesting everyone you you give this to anyone they say what's the word sedic they all come out with the word righteousness it's very funny no one ever uses that word in real English but I can guarantee you ask any you know kid that's come out of high school what does sedic mean righteousness it's like they don't even know what that word means it's like a pavlovian reaction okay there's a problem with this posic though it sounds like he's talking to a judge don't favor the poor don't favor the rich judge everybody but sedic but it uses a word at the end of that pos which does not belong in a court which is amit. You don't have friends in court. You're not meant to have friends in court. On the contrary, if it turns out that you're the judge and your friend comes up in front of you, you have to recuse yourself. You're not allowed to judge them. That's not okay. And therefore, you see that Rashi is playing with this as well, bringing. But he says on top of page number three, his first is yeah, it's what it sounds like in a court. Don't judge unfairly. Alternatively, now judging your friend, the calf obviously is the in the old scales the mo you know they go up and down and the is the positive side the the the whatever you call that thing the dish that goes down but that's the opposite of meaning but means fairly it doesn't mean favorably. The judge in a courtroom is not allowed to judge people favorably. That's not their job. Oh, the guy knifed someone. Oh, they were just trying to open an envelope and they and and you know they they they've got dyspraxia and they can't control their arms and we we we we don't we don't that's not a job for the judge. The jud has to judge has to look at the evidence and judge beta but on the other hand when you look at your friend apparently you have to judge. It's not the same thing. How can these two apparently different ideas come out of the same puk? Rash's coming off the gummoran which brings these two ideas in number 11 says this is in the court you the judge can't have one litigant standing uncomfortably and the other litigant he can sit down. It's not fair one can have a full speech on the other one he says to him no that's enough I've heard enough of you. He can't do that. But say they do it has to be fair. And now said alternatively, you have to judge your friend favorably. try to judge them. Yaf. So this is a very important statement. What does it mean? Someone who's with you in Torah and mitzvah. So we'll see that actually what's going on in the mitzvah of is a very precise analysis by the person of what what happened here is what did this person do? And we'll see in a minute are they at Saddadic? Are they a Russia? What do those words mean? This is a very uh very specific analysis. It's not just a you ask people what does it mean dollar so the kids will come out of school they'll say ah it means you have to think nicely about everybody but they don't really believe that >> benefit of the doubt >> the benefit of the doubt but what if there's no doubt what if it's so clear how else could you interpret this and also you can't go through life with some kind of rose tinted spectacles everybody's nice everybody's good surely they'd never think surely they don't you'll never be able to look after yourself there's a word for that in Hebrew it's called the fryer [laughter] yeah you can't be a frier people are going to walk all over you. You can't >> until >> what's that? >> Innocent until >> Okay, innocent until proven guilty. But on the other hand, uh sometimes you got to make a decision. Sometimes important things rest on it. You know, let's say, um I like to give a case. Let's give a case. Um let's say you've got a young woman coming to babysit for you tonight for your grandchildren, for your children, okay? and you're driving through town and you see her standing uh in a very sketchy part of town outside a place which is known to be a place where they deal drugs and she walks you stop the car you're looking and she walks into the shop. She talks to a shady looking guy in the shop. He gives her a brown paper bag. She shoves it under under her coat. She comes out. She looks around and she sort of runs up the road. And this girl's coming to babysit for your kids tonight. Innocent until proven guilty. Is that how it works? Well, maybe she's picking up a prescription for a for maybe the grandmother's on medical marijuana. Maybe they're that. No, no, no, no, no, no. You're not going to turn around and say, "Yeah, she'll be fine. I'll leave her with my kids. What could go wrong?" That's not so straightforward. You have to work out how to work out those cases. So, that's uh certainly those two polls. You judge in a in a in a courtroom fairly and we're going to judge our friends favorably. We'll see what that means. We haven't put that together yet. And the Gomorrah brings another interpretation number 12. One person on a Torah level could be a soul judge. Not singular. You must judge. One person can be a judge. What's people who don't really know if you pick one person to be a judge then you might have picked a doozy. You know what they say? What? He might be a person who's not really capable of judging. Ah. How do you know you didn't pick three might get three donim who were all no one of them was bound to know something it's very you're very uh you know unlikely to get three people who didn't know if you look at what the Rambam says he translates all of that into the mitzvah in a way which is slightly different very interesting which will lead us into the next stage number 13 mitzvah number 177 Seven have a mitzvah to to be fair between the two litigants in court. So you each one has to have their say or whatever length or whatever short you have to give them the same. If you want to speak long short they both have to have the same quotes. just like we saw. That's just one of the reasons, one of the explanations of this mitzvah. I give you another one, says the rama. It's very interesting. Not that one person can be a judge, but if you're the person, you need to be the judge. [snorts] If you can make shalom between two people and you have the wherewithal, you know what you're doing and you know what the is, then you can't stand by and say, "Oh, it's none of my business." You have an obligation to get involved. Obviously, if you know what you're doing and to be the D and he brings here and there's another explanation just brings it down. You should judge your friend favorably. You should try and explain what they're doing as being good, as being the right thing. Now, Raers, you can read in your own time on the bottom of page three who tries to bring shalom between these two different approaches. What does it mean? The judge has to be fair, but you have to be favorable. and he wants to say one's in the core room, one's in society. But I'm going to bring you a different approach which I think is more interestingly which the Ram himself is going to spearhead. So let's go over to the next page because this is where I think it's going to get interesting. Is this mitzvah a Torah mitzvah or a rabbitic mitzvah? And the answer is a Torah mitzvah. It's in the Torah number 15. You should judge a questionable situation favorably. Okay? You have to judge. If you judge other people favorably, then God will judge you favorably. You're the you judge favorably. God will judge favorably. And that's the Torah. Again, he brings the Torah mitzvah and includes within it this idea of judging people um favorably. And how do these two go together? He doesn't explain, but clearly he says it's a Torah mitzvah. But then when you get to number 16, the the things that you read in a are they Torah obligations? Generally speaking, not they're kind of icing on the cake. They're good midas. They're extra. is meaning uh you smile at everybody rather than scowl at everybody. Okay, that's not I mean if you want to walk around with a miserable face, you're not breaking a Torah mitzvah, but you're not doing the extra level of being a more approachable person. So the things we see in we do not expect them to be Torah mitzvah. It doesn't say inot keep Shabbat, keep kosher, don't speak horror. It says these extras. Well, I thought we said it was a Torah mitzvah. If it's a Torah mitzvah, then he told not an extra, it's a Torah mitzvah. And the Rambam says explicitly number 17, it's an extra level of he says, but one second, the Rambam just included this in his description of the mitzvah in the Torah. He said mitzvah number whatever it was 177 is now he's saying it's it's a how do those two things live together it's different and so too when the ram describes a says number 18 which means anyone who represents Torah to the general public shouldn't scream and shout shouldn't act like a talk like a should be gentle They shouldn't raise their voice more than they need to. They should speak nicely and gently with everybody. They should be the people who say hello first. How have I, you know, it's uh you know people you can walk down certain roads in certain Jewish communities on Shabas and and and it's like you're invisible, you know. So, uh I'm not naming any communities, God forbid. Otherwise, uh that would be that would be >> You're not a woman either. >> I'm not a woman either. Well, I can't disagree with you on that one, but uh but you're right. Women also have a different uh I tell you something. I was once many years ago walking through a certain place. I'm not going to say where it was where I didn't expect anyone to say gabas to me. And this man walked past me. He's not the only person who ever said good shabas to me, but this man walked past me with a big smile and said chabas like this. And I was like so taken aback. Thought like gosh, that doesn't happen to me so often. And then I'm walking past him. I'm thinking who is that man? I know. I reckon I realized he was Rash Makbah. [laughter] Was Rabash Malbach. That's the one and only time that I that I met him. He actually passed away the next week when he was on the flight back from where we were to somewhere else. I'm not saying where it was. And and that was my that was my encounter with and and really this idea of shalom in the street, it really affected me. Okay. So everybody, you should be the first person to say hello. Say so that you get on well with people. And you have to judge again not the bottom line the extra. So the answer here which is going to pull it all together is in the wording in the in the Torah which is the Torah mitzvah. It says that's the Torah mitzvah in what does it say? There's a big difference between aadam and a and that's going to open up the whole look at number 19. This is the ram on. He's going to explain it all very clearly. Number 19. What does that mean? Here's the meaning. Someone you don't know your by definition. You know you have a with your you have a connection. This is a colladam. You don't know them from Adam as they say in English which is very interesting. In sadik who or Russia you don't know if they're at sadic. You don't know if they're a Russia. And the the kdesh here saddic and rash don't mean holistic characters like sort of cardboard cutout um stereotypes of the saddak means that sadic in this mitzvah there are certain mitzvah that you can look at a person say they they'd never break that mitzvah. Okay, they're not perfect. They make mistakes, but then that's just not possible that they would do that. Okay, or Russia here doesn't mean an evil person. It means that okay, I don't know whether they're a Russia holistically. Maybe in Grenada and they'll be way ahead of me. But this mitzvah, they don't do, don't forget on on the from the Torah, a Russia is someone who does not perform a mitzvah, a specific mitzvah. And sadic is someone who does perform this mitzvah. It's not talking about the people. It's not the personalities. It's did they do this thing wrong? You see somebody doing something, it looks sketchy, it looks strange. I give some more examples. We had the one about the young lady babysitting. Give you another example. You walk past McDonald's and you look through the door, look at the window, and your rabbi is sitting there eating what looks like a Big Mac. Okay, cheeseburger. And you think to yourself, what's happening here? Is this rabbi eating a cheeseburger? Yes or no? Another case uh you could think of, you go into the mac, somebody walks into the mac, goes up to the shelf, picks up a tub of cottage cheese, puts it in the bag and walks out. Oh, I've just witnessed a theft. Is this person a shoplifter or are they not a shoplifter? Maybe the person bought some yogurt or whatever it was cottage cheese last week and they looked at the date and the date was was already out of date. I'm sure that's happened to you once or twice. You buy something and you go, he went back to the mall. He said, "Fine, fine. Just put it here. Just take another one off the shelf. It's fine. How do I know? Maybe this person is a thief. Maybe they're not a thief. Says the Rambam, you need to know whether they're at Saddic, meaning is it they would they have done this thing wrong or a Russia or would they would they definitely not have done it wrong or would they almost certainly have done it wrong or maybe they're in between? We'll see. But a Coladam, I don't know anything about them. Nothing. I can't judge. I have no information. in Russia. End of the first line of 19. And then you see them. You see them doing something, saying something. If I explain it a certain way, then it comes out he did a good thing. But if you if you explain it a different way, maybe it was a bad thing. Judge it favorably. Why do you think bad of people? meaning you're not really making a judgment. It's like going to a judge in a courtroom and saying, "Judge this person. Where's the evidence? We have no evidence." Well, I can't be a judge if there's no evidence. The answer is, okay, you're not being a judge here. This is the Why don't you think of the world in a positive way? Be a half full person, not a half empty person. Of course, if it really matters and you need to know, you're not going to make a decision based on this judgment. this person with the cottage cheese, he then comes to you next week in the uh in your company for an interview to going to be responsible for your finances. Okay. So now now it matters because now I need to know do I give them a job or not give them a job? So I can't just think, oh yeah, I'm sure they're great. I have to really look into it. But when it doesn't matter, they're call you're just looking at people in the world. Do you look at people like you know the midash with Shimar and his son, you know, burn everybody up. Everyone you look at is because everybody's a Russia. No, don't be like that. Look at people in a positive way. Of course, when it really matters, then you got to judge. But here you can't judge. So that's the and that's why says the Rambam that's should be seeing the world as half full not half empty, but that's someone you don't know. Second box number 19. >> The example of the chiefs might not be a good example. >> Why? because you actually have a responsibility to the to the so you actually might have to just excuse me for that because you owe it to the store. >> Okay. But then you're being somebody of possibly let's say it was your rov >> let's say it was your rov and your RV comes in and you say excuse me did you pay for that? Like I me of stealing cottage cheese for seven shekels meaning it really matters who they are. It really matters who they are. Maybe it's saying it's a kaladam. So it's a kal Adam maybe. Okay. So then you could do that. You could do that. It's not saying you're not allowed to do that. It's saying that you know you're worried about my colle. A lot of people cheat from steal from my colle >> I don't know if you need to. I don't know if you need to because there are all sorts of good ways to explain why they did that. You don't have to assume that everybody is a thief. Maybe it depends on where where where you you are. Meaning in some parts of America, honestly, you walk into Target or stores or CVS, whatever. I go there quite a lot and there's nothing on the shelves. Everything's just locked up. It's either locked up or there's just the shelves are empty and there's like a QR code and scan this thing and someone will come and bring you the item. Why? Because the everyone's going to steal everything. So maybe there that's actually the last place you want to ask someone, excuse me, did you pay for that? Okay, cuz cuz then then then you won't get out of there. But um but in a normal place, maybe not. Okay, second box is second option. You're they're a person that you know sadic. They wouldn't do that. Okay, my rabbi is not perfect. But there's no way in the world he's eating cheeseburgers in public in McDonald's. It's just not It's not possible. It's just not possible. >> In a trade McDonald's. Yeah. Obviously. Yes. Yeah. Kosher McDonald's, you know. Fine. In a trade McDonald's in in America, there's no weight. meaning rabbis have yates horrors but not for that not for that um there's a story of Rashim schwab Rafimab was on the walking the subway and he saw one of his balabatim eating a tra hot dog in the New York subway and he's thinking like you know the kim in in Washington Heights there in Buers again they're not perfect maybe that yakas are not perfect but even yakkas are not perfect but they don't eat hot dogs on the subway they just don't never so he said there must be something else going on here no idea what has to he's a saddic. Later he gets a little note to visit the guy in hospital and the guy's in hospital and he says you know what's wrong? He goes I've got a bleeding ulcer and the doctor told me that if I have an attack or whatever I have to put food in my system and you'll never guess the kind of tariff I've had to eat just to save my life. He says no I can guess [laughter] I can guess what the tarapus is. So if the person is at sadic what does that mean? Uh And you see them doing thing. It looks 99% terrible. How could I explain this positively? The the only way to explain it positively is very far-fetched, terribly far-fetched and highly unlikely. How could this be positive? It looks terrible. Nevertheless, you have to assume that it's good. Why? First of all, it could it could be there is a way even farfetched of describing as good you can't you can't suspect them. That's why it says if you then you deserve malcus the person's at sadic a looks 99% bad. Okay, maybe they stopped being at sadic. How do I know? Maybe my rabbi suddenly had a complete meltdown and five minutes before said that's it. I'm throwing off my whole, you know, God forbid. The answer is that's not how you walk around the world. People who are at sadic, people, someone with a sadic has a khazaka. You have a kazaka. Every time you walk in front of one foot in front of the other, you're thinking maybe the ground will disappear from under my feet and there'll be an earthquake. Who knows? It happens. You can't go through life like that. Your assumption is whatever has been until now will be going forward. The person was a sadic. They remain a sadic. Obviously, if the evidence keeps building up and and all of a sudden you hear, "Oh, did you hear about Rabbi so and so? He's kind of gone nuts." Okay, then you can start reassessing. But the guy who is in the in the McDonald's, there's no way it's bad. It's definitely good. >> Okay, we'll get there. We'll get there. We'll get there at the end. We'll get to the end. And the third box here, what if the person's a Russia? What does it mean? They're well known that they don't do this. I don't mean that they're a Russia. You don't know if they're at Saddak or Russia because you've never stood in their place. How dare you judge someone as a Russia. Russia here means no. They don't keep that mitzvah. I have a nextdoor neighbor. Let's say he's a lovely guy. He doesn't keep kosher. He just doesn't. He's a non-religious Jew. He doesn't keep kosher. So if I and then he invites me to his house for for a meal. I can't eat there. He doesn't keep Shabas. He doesn't keep kosher. Oh, but then I see him running around town asking, "Is this Mahadran? Is this basically Ysef? Is this this? Is this? Oh, maybe he now keeps kosher. Maybe [clears throat] I could eat there. No, he doesn't keep kosher. You can't assume just because he's running around doing something that looks positive that now he knows all about cashas. Now he has no monus. The guy doesn't know anything. I can't eat there. I'm sorry. He still remains a Russia. Not a Russia that I blame him for. But he does he's not going to serve me kosher food. He's not going to know what that is. So what happens then? And everything about what I'm now seeing looks amazing. And this it's very unlikely that it's going to be bad. Nevertheless, you have to steer clear of that person. They haven't they haven't changed. People remain what they are until the evidence spills up. Someone who's a fraud and a scammer and a swindler and then one of your neighbors comes, "Oh, I met that nice man and he said he's going to lend me money and he's don't go near him." Oh, well, maybe he did choua. Maybe the guy's now learned his No, he's a swindler. He's a swindler. You have to warn people, stay away from me. The guy's a swindler. Don't believe that it's good. This is the mitzvah. But means you have to judge people fairly. Now, in many cases, because many people had for many mitzvah that means favorably, but favorably is fairly because they're a sadic, they have a you can't think bad of them. But sometimes that mitzvah is you have to judge them bad because they're Russia for this mitzvah. That's part of the mitzvah. The mitzvah is not to judge your a person you know uh in in a kind of vaguely positive way. That's a but not a someone who is a you have to know they're at saddic. They're a Russia. My rabbi is at sadic for eating tray from McDonald's. He's not at saddic for double parking on Friday morning when he buys kalas. You see a rabbi driving in America you know parking you know blocking the road and runs in for kalas. What you going to say? Oh must be a a kala emergency. There's a nephesh. There's someone who if they don't eat kala they're going to die and that's why no the guy's just not considerate he didn't par well well he didn't drive nicely a rabbi could do that unfortunately that can happen I'm not sure they're a rasher I'm not sure rabbis have a d of a rasha that they always drive badly maybe they're what's coming up next is a beni but there some people have a saddic for this and a rasha for that number 20 says the not everybody's at saddic and arasha meaning not everybody Can you say about them? They never do this wrong or say about them they never do this right. Some people are but many people are not. Many people are what's they try they try to avoid it but sometimes they you know they fail. That's a lot of people for a lot of things. Most people for for lash and horror most people are not sadikim that you I can't believe there are people who are I know people who I don't believe a word of lotion horror would would would leave their lips but most people are not most people are not rashim rashima like gossipers bal lotion horror I don't know many people like that most people are being known they do well most of the time but every now and then they just they can't resist or they forgot yeah >> and when you speak at the sha table about lean or judging. >> That's a great question. >> Oh, that's a good question. Well, maybe you might take the view that, you know, I'm not Kaskan and Shilas, but once these people become political public figures, then they open themselves up to public scrutiny. It depends on how you say it and what you say etc. I don't think politicians should be scared to say anything about them. On the other hand, people have crazy ideas. This one must be this and this one must be that. Has to make sense. But what should you do? If you can make it look, you know, on the good side, then great. We're going to see that tomorrow right now. But if they're a meaning it could really go either way. They're not a they don't have a where if it's 99% bad, it must be good. They're but it looks bad. then I can't really judge it. I've got to be careful. But don't be too quick to say it's bad, but you can't judge it positively. Why? It's very analytical because you're the judge. Listening a TV program. You're the judge. You are the judge here in in a private situation. You're not a judge of the person as a holistic person because we never judge individuals. You're a judge of the circumstances. What What happened here? Did this person steal the cottage cheese? Did this young girl buy drugs? Did this rabbi eat trafe? You you and I need to know why? Because the girl's babysitting for me. I need to know the answer. So, okay, let's take that case. A teenage girl, 18year-old in your community, you don't know her that well, but she's a nice girl from a from family. Can you say with absolute certainty she's a tadic? There's no way she would ever be buying drugs. >> No, >> I don't think so. People, it's a very complicated world we live in. Can you say that she's a Russia? She's a what? If she's a drug dealer and a drug addict then yeah okay what do you think she's doing but that's not most people is she's a bani and then you have to add up well what what happened here and you have to look is it more than 50% good is it more than 50% bad maybe you have to leave it as a sophic and then is the next question which is not this mitzvah so I've judged the situation what should I do I call them up do I call the police do I speak to the parents do I that's another mitzvah what do you do she need my help etc But that's not this mitzvah. This mitzvah is I need to know what happened and I don't have all the facts. I'm not judging any individuals. What happened? Sadic Russia Bayoni etc etc. So have a look at the garra which is very interesting that uh that deals with this. First of all before we do the gmorrah let's have a look at number 22. The Gmorrah says if you see and he did something wrong at night he did he did something wrong don't don't think bad of them the next day because maybe they did chuva and he's about says well maybe they did chuva chuva they for sure did chuva there they must have done chuva says says that's with most matters when it comes to money. You can't assume that anyone did for money things cuz even gets tempted when it comes to cheating. Everybody is tempted by money and everybody is tempted ain't appetitropas. Everyone is tempted by sexuality. Other things you can judge. Oh, they did uh they did chuva. But don't be a frier. There are pl there are plenty of people who didn't resist again I'm not going to judge them individually as person didn't resist the temptation to cheat when it comes to money. Also the garra says this don't be don't be naive and when it comes to sexual issues everybody has to be as careful as everybody else. There's nobody that is beyond that. There are garas unbelievable gumaras of um who was it? Uh Rabi Amram, I think it was Rabi Amra was was uh had there were captives in the roof. Um they were that sounds a bit weird. There were captives in the roof. They they they brought some uh they were paid um pigeon and they brought some women back home that were and they put them in the roof out of the way in in the attic so they wouldn't disturb them. and they're very and he walked underneath and he caught a glimpse of one of these women and she was unbelievably good-looking and he slept the ladder to the to the attic and he starts climbing up the ladder and he and he can't he can't stop himself and then he suddenly starts screaming in the middle there's a fire in the house there's a fire in the house and everybody runs in they see him climbing the ladder to get to these women and they say how embarrassing he goes no it would have been more embarrassing if I'd have got to the top meaning he knows that even the great time of some things that are major major yates horror And we've seen this with our own eyes over the years. But generally speaking, people for other areas. Now let's look at this shabas number 23. If you judge others favorably, either God will judge you favorably or the others will judge you favorably. Let's look at this story. Beautiful Gmoras. There was a man who came down from the upper Galilee and he went to the south and he uh worked as a schle as a laborer for this man in the south shan him for three years. Now the gim had a had a masora and look in the shelters that the the the man who came from the north was Rabbi Aka in his younger days when he was not yet a kam and the man in the south was Rabbi Benhurinus one of the richest men in Israel and also a major figure in the tan. So he went to work for the other one. Fine. It's very important. Everybody's making an effort on the one day a year. Like I want to at least get this right if I can. Says to him, I suddenly realize I need to go and I'm going to go and I'm going to go and feed my wife and children. I've been away for three years and they're waiting for me. I'll bring back some money. I'm he said to him, I've got no money. Sorry, can't pay you. I'm a I'm a said to him pay us. Give me produce. I'm a no. No produce. Really? No produce? You're one of the richest men in Israel. Tenley ka. Give me some land. The deeds to some land for my money. Any tenly behast, give me anything. Give me pillows, blankets. I've got to take something home. Any nothing. He threw his pack on his back. He went back home devastated. You know, he's going to walk in. What's his wife going to say after three years? What do you have to bring home after sukusaba from the south takes? takes all the money for in the north and he takes three extra donkeys one with loaded with food one loaded with drink one loaded with you know chocolates and and sweeties and whatever nice kings things that they'll like and he goes to his house by the way there's a ribb question there I'm not getting into that now but that's for another time after they ate and they drank gave his money to he said okay now I want to ask you when you said to me give me your money, give me my money for and I replied I have nothing. What did you think was going on? So Rabi says I thought maybe you suddenly had a a deal that came up a special offer. Okay. And the money the cash went in. Has it ever happened that someone came to your house did a job and you want to pay them? Oh, I've got no cash. Happens all the time. Does that maybe that happened? You didn't have any cash. You he asked him, you know, as a surprise. Didn't have any cash. Could be you ran out of cash. Okay. When you said to me, give me animals. And I said, I have no animals. But what did you think of me then? I thought maybe all these animals that I can see, they're all leased out. They're all going to other people. You can't give them away. They're all You owe them all to other people to who rented them. Maybe possible. When I said to you, I no land. What do you think? Maybe it's let out to sharecroers. Maybe the land it looks like it's land, but you don't have the rights to give it away. When you when I said to you any pirates, I have no produce. But what did you think then? says, "I thought maybe you can't give it away. It's not been tithed and you're worried if you give away non-tithe produce then I might eat it without yet." And when finally I said to you, I don't own a dime. I can't pay you anything. I can't give you anything. But what could you possibly have thought then? Says, "I thought Maybe you made a and you gave everything away and you didn't own anything. Now that's pretty unlikely. But he said to him, I swear he said that's what happened. I was very angry with my son Hinus because he wouldn't go to yeshiva. He just wants to. There's a whole story there. Maybe I get if I have time I'll mention it. And I got annoyed and I gave away all my property show he wouldn't inherit a dime. And when I came to my colleagues in the south he did it's all happening. He realized oh I'm a fool. I I I I can't I'm not going to achieve anything by disinheriting my son. I'm going to get my money back. And once I got my money back here's the money just like you judge me favorably. So again at the end of the day is trying to make the most reasonable assumptions. Maybe the land is least, maybe the animals are least. Maybe the fruit is not tithed. And when he comes push comes to shove, maybe he gave away all his produce or all his belongings for some reason or Rabben Hukinus has turned into the biggest Russia you can imagine. on erviper he sends away a guy who's worked for him for three years with nothing because he's a schwwindler which of those is more likely he must have given his money away it's just not possible that rebel had act on ervipa and that turned out to be true the backstory is very interesting railben hus was a balchuva his father hinus the elder didn't want him to get f was very unhappy that he was now religious cut him off from everything. His father was a big businessman, very rich and there was a big fallout because the son's now Bouva and gone like over the deep end and Rabbi Leah was really kharif and eventually the story is Rabi Rabben Zachai invited the father to the yeshiva and god Rabza to give the dasha and Rabi and the father was crying goes oh this is so beautiful I didn't realize you know I've never been to ara before or whatever it is and I didn't realize this is what you did what I thought you were doing was like brainwashing and this this is beautiful and he and they there was a you know a rapromo a reconciliation how beautiful except the next generation the children of the balcha hinus the son wants to be like grandpa a businessman I I don't want to go to yeshiva I like grandpa I like his lifestyle more and rebel is annoyed like I became a belcha so that you can go off to derk it's like difficult you know children of bal chuva is this tough time and and and then eventually there's all that stress so the gammorra is dealing with this very strained relationships is very interesting. 24 and 25 I'll leave you to read on your own. All situations where things look really sketchy but it turned out that actually they were good and the only reasonable way to explain it even though far-fetched was a positive way and you can read them on your own. You can look at the gumaras there. It's very very interesting. Like we said, just let's finish off and we'll deal with the Maris points just right now. 26 is the garra that you're not meant to be. It brings Mosher Rabenu the famous case that he said the Jewish people won't listen and in the end he's he's the one that didn't listen and he was and that was not correct. Um but at the end of the day there is something called it's not really Maris. Maris this is the other end of the the sort of the stick. Marus iron is where I do something which is um which looks good and other people but people won't understand what it is and will say oh I didn't know that was allowed I'm going to do that too so uh maybe it doesn't look good it gives classic example is uh dairyfree milk yeah someone sees you having a meat meal when you're pouring dairyfree milk in your coffee and they don't realize oh that must be milk and this man's and he'd never do anything wrong I didn't know you're allowed to milk and meat. I'll do that too. That's maris where you didn't do anything wrong and the person thought you wouldn't do anything wrong and they made a terrible error because it didn't it was misleading. Yeah. Is the opposite where people are going to look at you and think, h like we said at the beginning of this year, they're going to judge you badly. They're not allowed to judge you badly. You've got to worry about them judging you badly because even though we're not meant to judge people ever, we're meant to judge situations like we said saddic, rash, bayani, etc. But people do judge. Have a look at number 28 and 29 says that God says the promise to the Jewish people the land will be conquered and you will live in the land and you have to be clean not just in the eyes of God but you have to be clean in the eyes of people. And the bigger you are, you have to be even more squeaky clean. It's very hard. Look at the Gmorrah the Mishnim number 29. meaning someone who deals with the in the he's in the finance departments of the B mikdash and he's dealing with money all day long. He's not allowed to walk into the to the finance areas with with a hem on his on his cloakal. He's not allowed to walk in with shoes. Sandal or with sandals fillin not with fill in because people are going to say, "Oh, he's slipping coins in here and there. or not with an ambullet. Maybe the guy's going to get poor. What will people say? You know why he's poor? He's poor because he's a thief. Or maybe he'll get rich. Say, meaning you can't win with people. Even if the guy gets rich, if the guy gets poor, people are going to assume that you're af. is terrible because a person has to do the right thing by people to look squeaky clean by people just like bye and he brings a and then he brings a we say or paraphrase in benching meaning yes there are all sorts of mitzvah not to judge and let's summarize we have a mitzvah never to judge people individually personally we never judge people because They could be a big sadic. You've never been in their shoes. You don't know who they are. How can we be the judge only is the judge. But we need to judge situations because we need to protect ourselves. We need to work out the right answers. We don't want to be a frier. And there comes the mitzvah of judge situations. And to do that, you have to be an analytical. Are they? Are they a Russian? Are they a Does it look good? Does it look bad? D. So it's no less complicated to judge situations than to to keep is also very uh very detailed and we have to know how to use that as well. So there's a lot to say. We've managed to get through most of it. Next week we'll go on to pastor's new but hopefully you felt that was interesting and useful and certainly very relevant.