L'Covid Shabbos Part 3: Kids & Friday Night: Making it Work

[Music] some practical tips on how to make the Shabbos su the more meaningful and more special we spoke first of expectations expecting every child to be able to sit quietly for an hour is unreasonable and most children and I already spoke about the Shabbos sudha the kiddush it's very very important in general to try to get as many people in the family to have their own jobs their own traditions this is what they do this one does this this one is that and they have a ownership of that job of course we have to figure out what job works the best for every child so sometimes you may know and sometimes I mean not here's a great tip ask your child can you please sweep the floor if it gets done graciously it's probably a good job for that child if she's still gonna do it and so I'm gonna do it ever gets to do it probably China [Music] so Shabbos the kiddush my father traditionally always announced where I met me kiddush it's a mitzvah of the Torah to make it it's a great thing I added on to that a little bit why do we make kiddush anybody know of course my five-year-old says to remember that a Chevy the world excellent what else to remember that a sham to kiss adam it's Ryan and that became our job we're stuck in this shipment remember Fatima commits with their eyes up I meant to the Torah to make kiddush one of our weary kiddush and my youngest daughter young one of my younger daughter says do you remember myself to kiss adam it's Ryan and if I match them creatively so that's why we did why are we washing our hands now I don't know a great question don't mind that self why we do you see why do you want to see this to them the great things just to stay focused we're really doing something we're not just eating some of the great things to do during the meal many people have a big problems Amir Oh singing some euros children that want to sing some people they can contest out of it and a big gun you know I can't even whoever sings nicely gets candies whoever gets see nicely gets tickets for a raffle again it's you know a lot of Hebrew words and many boys children boys and girls don't even know what it means again zones Muse has a little bit of explanation a little bit of the words and that's a great great thing to use Venice Chavez table and then of course just not just a Shabbos amuse if your children are learning songs and at home or in school and a nice songs seem to my showers table whole family together can be beautiful mentioned the idea of making a big deal back again every family is different make a big deal about this Miro's I know somebody who every child gets a leather bound venture with their name on it they sit and again many times these candies in these contests don't have to be forever once it becomes a family tradition that we all seems mirrors we start enjoying it and have to keep giving out the kids we spoke again about preparing stories everybody loves a good story so if the father or the mother was a good storyteller children again a young child the seven-year-old could listen to one of the words get a great story she likes performing better see the story partitions Marcia sheets are great the children have questions from their teachers every child can show off their knowledge and from the whole family everything go Wow Wow anybody know what partially this week my wife always says I don't know how I did go to school and my little I don't know Wow what why she did okay great excellent some families play passion baseball get listed questions play parsha baseball list of questions and the child says I want to single I want to double I want to triple a single as easy question you divide the question is a harder question aren't a question now you play progress you basically go around the patient's they score they win you get three points you get a whatever it is you get whatever the prize is it's another great thing to do at a table another great thing is debating questions you ask a question whatever they'll contribute what is the halacha if you have an elevator and in the elevator there is only told spawn people then eight people went into the elevator and they pushed a button and it went up and then it broke because it only holds five people what's that local everyone can have an opinion about that and then you open up again business in our law club business questions and I'm all I got so Aldi one of these great books we need some silver stain there's a great book called shoes that has these ethical questions you asked the question everyone debates everyone gives their opinion Evelyn loves you in their opinion and then you say okay it happens to be this hard shoes look so bad some people say like this one and some people say like that one you can have a great discussion by the Shabbos table just a great story I heard from Alan David all of a sudden he said that he was at work and one of the non-jews it was Thanksgiving any since why aren't you leaving early and not having a Thanksgiving dinner he said no he says you have no idea where your missing Thanksgiving vism dinner our family gets together we have delicious food we talk everyone is common would you elect Thanksgiving dinner is amazing why don't you have it Thanksgiving them they smile being yourself we have three of them every week and then we have holidays many holidays we have many of these dinners but the non joiners suggested dinner the magic of a dinner the magic of a family again where the most important things where the family is to real has everyone on their level how long can you expect your fibro to sit by the table which parts is really important for him to be there maybe it'll be kiddush may will be a story and maybe the main course and dessert just another I want to throw on another idea a debate some people want all the children to be there by the main course possibly another it is let the adults enjoy the course in altitude be quiet though peaceful and then call them in for the main course here's a great idea fantastic idea I think every family should try this it's called US government's every body in the family should try to come in let's every Friday night with a story that happened to them or story that happen to someone they know of how stuff applies Chicago brothers me I just saw that Hashem is in my life and this is a great great great tool that children at a very young age can start thinking oh this week we were supposed to have a trip a field trip and it was a rainy week and the day that we had to go it wasn't raining it's a fantastic parents I'm supposed to have a meeting with my boss and zoom wasn't working and this wasn't working and suddenly I bumped this remote that I thought of a great idea to help us everyone has that stuff about the story my children said I always forget my cover I have one during the week every single week but I was forget it so we got a little book we were all running I should go help Rob out this book and we kept in the kitchen and as soon as someone had asked all help run the story middle of the week they would run and write it down and then dashed off a pulse we used to joke no dessert with that I talked about the story it's phenomenal that even little children realize mom is having a Chicago prophecy God is in his life God is controlling North God joining dad's life God's running the children everybody gets that message it's so soft health of course the main part of every meal is dessert it's gotta be something good and even better if it's made by the children again you want it to be that everywhere the family feels ownership of the Shabbos soup so if I made the Franks and ice and I made the dessert there's nothing greater now what's it gonna cost you for a child to make it dessert if you already have a dessert it cost you a few extra dollars for the dessert it'll cost you chocolate chip all over the floor of the kitchen as soon as you finish cleaning it up you just clean the kitchen and she wants to make a Duncan Hines cake the shop is kava kava stylish and now last kitchen there is gonna be a mess again that's what it cost you what did you gain you invested and your child did something for Shabbos and when it comes showers and they bring out that Troy Duncan Hines cake if it got that but the sugar that ever goes on the Elijah's created a moment for the child and those investments are investments that every one of us have to be ready to make benching it's time for Benji great idea for the family to sing along again this doesn't work for every family every family is different but singing along the tension and again what are we doing why why are we benching why we do this oh we're thinking it okay let's go everybody and that's how you bringing me me too and finally the most important thing of a Chaba student is don't let it drag on and on and chilly moving slowly a nice space give everyone time to digest everything of course a song worst story of another course another song another debate another little something add and make it a smooth and pleasant experience I remember hasn't happened overnight work for every child doesn't always go for every family but everyone can do one step at a time one idea at a time they are trying to make a shop assuming it's a real honor [Music]