My Life Didn't Start Until I Was 65

I'm on a mission right now. My mission is a mission of you know going into rashashana. I'm exploring the idea of happiness. I'm exploring the idea of love. I'm exploring the concept of giving. Um of course and receiving. I want to go into this new year with a different light and that is why I asked you to come on here today. So shout out to Ellie Bashu. Recommended by the way. >> Shout out to Ellie. I just spoke to him before I got here. >> Okay. Beautiful. So thank you. He is my >> Thank you Ellie. >> He is my uh super. >> He likes to be called Elio. He's my Elio is my super fan of the week. So, uh, El Yahoo, thank you for continuing to listen and giving us tremendous feedback. He is a marketing branding guru, >> right? And he may show up soon. >> And, uh, he happened to have helped me come up with this logo of the none of your business podcast. Did you know that? >> I heard I heard he told me about that. >> Yeah. So, uh, so shout out to you, Ali. Uh, Rab Avi, >> what happened? It gets you nervous when >> Yeah. I I like Avi. >> Just Avi. >> Just Avi. Just call me A. >> Okay. Don't don't teach me anything and I'll call you Avi. >> Just call me Avy. [laughter] >> Okay. So, you learned >> regular regular guy. >> You learned something from your uncle. I'm sure you learned something from from from everyone. Let's get this started. So, welcome back everybody to the None of Your Business Podcast. Another amazing uplifting growth oriented episode where we are uncovering ourselves, the people behind the business. Uh thank you to all the subscribers, the listeners. We're we're overwhelmed with joy with so much that happened over the past couple of years and week after week we're putting out good content and thank you to the Prime Source production team. Thank you to all the subscribers and the comments. Keep it coming. We like hearing feedback and we are listening. So with us today is someone who I'm excited to be with and uh for the reason being that I'm on this journey. I'm uncovering happiness and I'm uncovering being joyful and being filled with love and going into the new year with that recognition and that idea and that concept. It's a little bit foreign to me and um I've been exploring it. So I'm so happy to have you Avi Weinberg. Thank you very much for being here. Thank you for joining us. Thank you for everything you're doing for the community, for the cl. You're saying let's get started. What's on your mind when you say let's get started? What are we starting? First of all, I I want everybody to know it's not about Avi Weinberg. Um, it's about the content and my goal [clears throat] is to perpetuate this so that people do this themselves and it continues on and one person teaches the other person, another person teaches the other person. So, it's about the content. So, very very important. It's about the content. It's not about Avi Weinberg. >> Okay. So I appreciate [clears throat] that when you say this. What is this? Replace this with another word. >> I'm saying this content is not about me. >> What's this though? What's the word this? What are you referring to when you say this? >> I'm referring to the um insights. We'll call it the sparks of Simha. SOS. Cool. Now >> like it sparks of um >> sparks of happiness. >> Sparks of happiness. I mean I'm exclusive on happiness. I've been working on it for 50 years and I'm still working on it and it's all about happiness. Straight up happiness. >> Okay. Um I like this. I I like where this is going. So and and we're going to get into it and we're going to break it down and I'm going to need you to break it down for me. And you know there's there's a concept of being happy. It's an emotion that I don't think could just be turned on when you tell somebody be happy, right? Why you not happy? Be happy. you're you're going to bring to light today in this discussion that it's not something that just happens overnight. It's you have to work on it, right? So, you just said 50 years. I'd like to take a step back and understand who you are, who's your family, where you from, where you grow up, what were your challenges when you grew up that led you to being on this journey. So, please, if you can just back up a little bit for us. Okay. I grew up in Lawrence, New York, in a place where there weren't many Orthodox Jews there. most or maybe all of my friends were in far rocket which is borders Lawrence and um I grew up in a family a very illustrious family um my parents were like from literally from the ammud from the pillars of Yiddish kite of Judaism and um so therefore I was introduced to many many illustrious people because of that that was very >> Who were your parents? Can you give me a little bit? >> My parents were Mosha and or we'll call him Morris. He was known as Morris Weineberg and my mother was Selma Weineberg. >> Okay. >> They were um phenomenal people. Um that's that's an understatement. And I say anything that I have, I attest to them plain and simple. >> Okay? >> Anything that I have, I attest to them. I give them the credit. In fact, I thank them every morning when Hashem wakes me up in the morning. I say, "Thank you, Hashem, for giving me back my nishama. And thank you to my three partners that brought me into this world." >> Three partners. >> Three partners, Hashem, my mother, and my father. >> Okay, you got me there. >> That's right. >> Okay. Got it. And uh so you tell me about your environment. >> And then I also I I mean I'm going to share this with you. I also thank all the people from Adam and Kava from Adam and Eve straight down because everybody deserves a thank you. >> Every morning you're saying you do this >> every morning. That's right. Every morning. >> Can you tell me the routine? I'd like to hear it. How does >> one take one second? And I also thank the people that are part of the makeup of the world >> for example. That means good people, happy people are the fiber of this world. The fiber that of the world is made up of good, happy people. So these are people to thank. >> I see. Okay. So >> this is I mean there's no better world than happy people. People that are creative, proactive, kind, uh caring, sensitive to others. wanting to bring out everything that life has to offer, excitement, fun. Um, you know what I'm saying? Next level. I mean, really next level. It's like it's it's almost a level of bringing the eternal world into this world. How How you like that? [clears throat] Isn't that pretty cool? I like it. I I do want to explore this whole Adam and Eve and thanking the people that are happy and all that stuff, but you got to take me back. Who are you? >> What made you get down this journey as a kid? Who were you? Did you >> Did you recognize happiness as a kid? Did >> what what were your challenges back then that helped you grow to who you are today? >> So, I must [clears throat] say like this. I'm 69. Thank God. Um at 65 I started living. 65 I started living. The trials and tribulations, the challenges and the struggles that I went through, some of them were indescribable. I mean, like when I say indescribable, I'm not mincing words, indescribable. But I always felt somewhere down deep that there was a solution to every challenge and to every struggle. How do you like that? That means I was pushing and pushing and pushing to say, you know what? There's something going on. There's a happiness out there that is it's there now. Find it, Avi. Find it under any and all conditions. And I want you to know the 65 years at some points were brutal. I mean, like nasty. The the consolation that I have now is the way I reflect back to this is Hashem was training me for 65 years. Training me, putting me through all kinds of different stuff so that when I come out of it, I'll be able to relate to people that are going through pain. When I see somebody suffering or I see somebody going through pain, it eats me up alive. The only thing that keeps me going is when I solve it and relieve the pain of the suffering. That's what that's what makes me feel good. And that's the only reason why I'm able to stomach hearing pain and suffering is because I know that I'll be able to get them out of it. Now, I don't know I'm going to get them out of it. I'm not king. I'm not King Solomon. To me, there's nothing greater than helping somebody, relieving pain and suffering. You can't do it even in the eternal world. So to me, it's a gift. That means if Hashem allows me to have this opportunity, there no words. So sometimes Hashem allows me the opportunity and sometimes Hashem doesn't allow me the opportunity. But it's such an opportunity that I would pay people to have problems and to have pain just to have that feeling of getting rid of it, of relieving them of that of that pain and suffering. >> That's a very unique way of looking at things. I've never heard that before. >> I'm saying cuz like this is what I do. I I help people get through life through struggles and challenges no matter what they are across the board. married, not married, single, this, that, the other thing, marital harmony, disharmony, that harmony. Um, trauma. I love trauma. I love the things that really scare the living daylights out of people. I love diffusing terror and horror and panic and oh my god like things that people can never ever get through in their life and it's about happiness. And I want you to know something. It's very interesting. We would think that now it's about happiness. No, no, no, no. It was about happiness from day one. Day one of creation was about happiness. The only reason why Adam and Eve ate from the forbidden fruit, so to say, is because of a lack of happiness. How do you like that? >> Ex explain that. And by the way, we're going to get back to your beginnings because you're shying away from it a little bit, >> right? >> And I I need to get context, >> right, >> for what you're saying and where where your background is and you say trauma. I want to understand to to live in that world that you've lived in to understand how you've overcome it. But go for it. What do you mean by Adam and Eve? Uh I'm saying like people people say as the generations progress there are different challenges that come up. Um, some say idol worship, some say um, sex, um, distorted sex. Um, some people say, uh, money is the issue. Um, all kinds of issues. Um, tongue issues, you know, what comes out of your mouth, all these issues. And so with the with the generations progressing it goes it shifts sometimes from one thing to another thing and then from another thing to another thing and we just keep on going. However, you see [laughter] the things like this, if anybody underestimates the power of we'll call him the devil, then they don't belong here. Plain and simple. You're not you're you're not in reality. It's it's as simple as all that. It really really is simple. the we'll call it the devil. We'll call it the sahara. We'll call it whatever you want to call it. Anything that's negative, we're going to attest to this angel. >> Okay. So, take me back to Adam and Eve and the core of all this. >> Okay. So, very simple. It's amazing that you ask people, what's the first thing Hashem said to Adam, Adam, when he created him? people are clue they're clueless. They don't they were not educated to know it. It's not like I'm coming up with this brilliance. Wow. Like I know this and you don't know this. It's black on white. You take a look at the Torah in the written Torah, not even in the oral Torah, right? It says clearly, Hashem creates Adam, Adam, and he says to him as follows. Eat from all the trees of the garden. It's fab. I mean, it's fascinating. That means like this. Hashem creates Adam in his palace in the Aen eden. Then he puts him into the gaden. He puts him into the garden of Aiden. And he says it says like this. And Hashem elim right that means Hashem is the mercy. Eloim is the den the judgment whatever [snorts] he commands Adam to eat from all the trees of the garden. Now that's pretty wild. I mean it's like crazy. I mean the first thing if I created Adam I would say you know what hey Adam. Hi, my name is God and you and listen to everything that I have to say. I created you so that you can listen to everything they have to say and it's a matter of what you have to do and it's a matter of what you can't do and get it together. It's like I mean like God is it couldn't be better. the first thing that he creates us and he says eat from all the trees of the garden and the garden was like magnificent right the garden of Eden and he says eat from all of them now then God says afterwards he says and from the eight from the forbidden fruit or the fruit of knowledge don't eat [snorts] so what does that mean that we can't eat it of course we can eat it because God said, "Eat from all the trees." All the trees, includes the eight sadas, the the tree of knowledge. But for some reason, Hashem says, "Don't eat it." So, there must be a good reason why he says not to eat it, right? I mean like if if I invite somebody into my house and I have everything in the world, all the fruits and vegetables and this and that from all sides of the world from different crops and for this and that and a whole spread and I invite the people into the room and I tell everybody to eat but I say, "You see that one thing on the table over there? Don't eat it. So now people that have any brains in their head and like they call them a mench, they they say, "Look, Aby, what a guy you are. I mean, like I I can't believe the spread you put out here." Do you think that they would focus on something that I say not to eat? Well, you [laughter] What's your problem? Well, he's such an ingrate that the only thing you could think about is that one thing I say not to eat and then you make a whole story about it. Why does he say not to eat? How come? And focus on that. Focus on it to the point that you disregard everything else that's good. I mean, it's insane. So, I want you to know something. When we come to like rash and we're talking about >> [snorts] >> um regret and this and that the other thing it's very simple a [clears throat] right in Hebrew a sin all it is is a mistake that's it can you believe that it's a mistake symbol I made a mistake [laughter] saying I'm in the garden of Eden I made a stupid mistake by focusing on one thing that I can't eat. That is pretty stupid. Besides the fact I didn't even realize I mean like Hashem said you can't you'll be you can eat it. >> I have to interrupt for a second and say as a human being, >> right? >> It's like almost like God set me up for failure. You're going to see all these amazing things in front of you, but that one little thing over there, don't even don't look at it. Meaning, come on. I'm a kid. >> You can look at it [clears throat] and you can even touch it. >> But you can't eat it. >> Don't eat it. >> Okay. But the point is that if obviously if everything else is so good and so delicious and so amazing, that thing must be wow if he's telling me not to eat it. So you're as a human nature, I'm curious. If you would invite me to your dining room table, I promise you I would take it, go to the back room, and I'd eat it. I don't know what to tell you. That's just my human nature. But continue. I like where you're going with this and the concept. So continue. you're talking about. >> I want you to know something. I would say that the biggest challenge in this world, in our world, by far with everything pale in comparison to it, is to realize the kindness and the benevolence of Hashem to us, plain and simple. How do you like that? >> Okay. I I I like everything you're saying, but let's break this down. Go back to Eden. >> So, break it down. What happened there based on what you're saying? Yeah. So, you say something like, "God set us up for failure." And I'm going to show you that not only did God not set us up for failure, but he set us up for success. >> Okay, continue. >> Watch this. In the Garden of Eden, right, there was one outstanding tree in the garden. The most outstanding tree in the garden was what? It was the tree of life. How do you like that? That was the tree that was stood out from everything, right? Why? Because God set us up for success. Because he wanted us to eat from the tree of life. Cuz he knew that we're going to probably struggle with the fact that we can't eat from that. So, we're going, you know, think maybe we should, maybe we shouldn't. Why does God want? Why doesn't God want blah blah blah blah blah blah and maybe we'll screw up and we'll eat it? So Hashem says, "Fantastic. So they'll eat it." But they ate from the tree of life, so nothing's going to happen to them. Like hello, why do you think the tree of life was the outstanding tree there? Cuz Hashem said, "Guys, be smart. Eat from this first so you're okay." Because after they ate from the the the tree of knowledge, they said, "Oh, darn it. We made a mistake. Let's eat from the tree of life." But now you eat from the tree of life. Genius. Eat from the tree of life beforehand. So in case you mess up, you've eaten from the tree of life. You dig it? >> Okay. So, and we're talking about Adam and Kava here. We're talking Adam and Eve, right? So, and and we're we are Adam and Eve today. >> Okay. Okay. >> It's just um it's just like um Adam is like till the end. Eve is till the end. So, we we we're just like take over. You know what I'm saying? Adam dies, somebody else takes over. Eve dies, somebody else takes over. Takes over, takes over, takes over, takes over. We're just continuing the >> So, we you left off before on the devil. You were talking about the devil and then you brought in Adam and Eve. So, let's go back to that. So, please connect the dots for me because this is something you're living and breathing and it's new to me. So, >> you have to break it down a little bit simpler for me, please. >> Okay. Um, >> and and go through what you're saying is written in black and white so and I can understand it better. >> Okay. It's really something I in in the Torah it says like this. Hashem commanded Adam, right, to eat from all the trees of the gun. >> Okay. >> Okay. Good. That's the first thing Hashem says. >> Okay. >> All right. >> Right. And it and it has to be a commandment nonetheless. Hashem commanded them. What do you have to command them for? Whatever. And then it says Hashem commanded him eat from all the trees of the garden. And he says a double expression. Eat you shall eat. What do you have to say? Eat you shall eat for just say eat. Okay fine. Now the first thing that the first thing that comes out of the no's mouth is what? He says like this >> being is the devil. >> The devil. That's what you're referring to. The devil. I'm referring to the devil. The devil the all the same thing. One and the same. >> Okay. >> What does he say? He says like this to he says to the Isa to the woman. He says, "Didn't Hashem say you can't eat from all the trees of the garden?" I mean like are you joking something? You know, it says the the snake was sly. He was cunning. He was sneaky. Is it cunning? Sneaky sly. He's a fat liar. I mean, how like ridiculous. God said, "Eat from all the trees of the of the garden." And he says, "Didn't Hashem say you can't eat from all the trees of the garden?" Like, I don't get it. What's going on here? Hashem is showing you, showing us, you know who you're dealing with? You're dealing with a fat liar. He's out to kill. He's out to kill you. He's out to kill me. He's out to kill everybody. And if it wasn't for the fact that I helped you out, you'd never be able to overcome him. So now I'm introducing to you what your challenge and your struggle is going to be in life. the devil. >> That's right. Now, if you underestimate him, you're making a mistake. Plain and simple. >> It's okay. We'll we'll get to that, but let's break this down because you have a very keen understanding of this part of the Torah, and I'm appreciating the fact that you've researched this obviously, and you you know about all the writings. So, keep breaking it down for me. First of all, why did the Satan go to the woman? >> The reason why [clears throat] he he's a smart cookie. >> Okay, he's a lot smarter than we think he is. He wants, make no mistake about it, he wants to kill Adam and Eve. What's the best way of killing Adam and Eve in one shot? Is going to the woman? Because if he kills the woman, now he kills the woman and the man. Because God said it's not good for man to be alone. He has to have a woman. So now if he kills the woman, boom, knocks them both off in one shot. >> Got it. Okay, thank you for that. >> That's pretty cool. No, >> that that's a great explanation. And then the fact that he's lying, why why would then Eve fall for such a lie? >> Why would Eve fall for such a lie? Um, good question. The truth of the matter is that when Hashem told Adam not to eat from, he only told it to Adam. He didn't tell it to plain and simple to Eve, right? When Adam told Eve what Hashem said, he said that God said not to eat it and not to touch it. So like he added that like we already come to adding that. What are you adding to what Hashem said for? So the reason why he added is because the way Hashem said it is that the day that you eat from the forbidden fruit, you know, the tree of knowledge, die, you're going to die. So he's like all scared and panicky. So he tells his wife, Hashem said, not to touch it because he's afraid that if she touches it, she's going to eat it. Bad mistake. Now, if you're smart, you you realize that who's the schemer over here? The schemer is the devil. That means the devil make sure that Adam is going to tell Eve that Hashem said not to touch it. I mean, he he's the force behind the holes. You know what I'm saying? I always say like this. A a soldier goes out to war. He has all the ammunition and the equipment and the this and the that and he goes out going ho, right, dude. If you don't realize that there's a sniper 500 yards out that has his target on your head and you're not a soldier, you're a dummy. You're going out there and blows your head off as soon as you get out there. So, Hashem says, I'm going I'm introducing you to what's going on here. like get a life. This is what's Make no mistake about it. He's out for the juggle. He's out for the kill. He's out to ruin everything. It's all for you. And the reason why I did this, it's all for you so that you should win over it and feel good and feel like you earned it and this and that. Everybody feels good on the challenge and a struggle. [snorts] That's it. Finish. End of the story. So, because we're just like God. God doesn't get anything for free. We don't get anything for free. Nobody likes getting anything for free. Everybody likes working for their thing. They like the struggle. They like the fight. They like the effort. They like the >> So you're saying that that's the reason why the Satan the devil was created so that we can have that feeling and uh >> winning >> a feeling of winning. >> That means that every there's one problem that's that festives. People think that when they have a challenge or they have a struggle, they start thinking about it. Why this that? God, what are you doing? Mean, dude, when you have a struggle and a challenge, it is for us. Everything in life is for us. And you know what it's for? To win over it. That's what it's there for. And guess what? Hashem wants us to win and he has our back and he says, "Go for it." He says, "Don't depend on me. If you wanted to depend on me, you could have stayed here. I sent you from the throne down here. I'm depending on you. You do it. Don't talk about me so much. You do it." Got it. So, and I like how you're doing this. You're you're you're setting the baseline and you're saying that Adam and Eve, >> the whole creation of the world and humanity was created with the devil in mind. and allow us to have this superpower to overpower the Satan, the devil. >> And that is the I guess the premise of all that we're going to discuss today. That's right. >> Understanding that concept and having that in our mind. And I I definitely appreciate what you're saying about that. Anything else that you want to add to the Adam and Eve and the Sutton and the and the and the tree of knowledge part that that we didn't talk about because I like your I like your knowledge of that uh whole history of what's written. And so is there any added stuff that's written about it that can help us understand more? >> You know what's the the book mas? >> Yeah. >> Okay. The sharm says that the world was created to have pleasure from Hashem and to enjoy the raise of who he is. Okay. So now What? Where's the devil? The devil says, "Listen, what do you think this is to have pleasure from Hashem? Pleasure from Hashem? What are you kidding? Not about pleasure, dude. What are you in kindergarten?" It's not about pleasure. It's pleasure. The way Hashem sees it, it's not real pleasure. The Torah defines pleasure. But pleasure that means like fun, enjoyment, alive, energy, this, that, the other thing. Come on. That's not what he's talking about. You understand? The devil is is called a manuval in the Torah. It's called manuval. Manuval is the worst adjective word in the entire lot. Okay, this is who he is. >> Okay, I have to tell you by the way that speaking of trauma, >> right? >> I remember my rebi calling me a manov. >> So I want to ask you that. >> Can you imagine? >> I I want to get into that because we skipped it before and I and I and again I appreciate you breaking down this whole Adam and Eve thing. Thank you for that and I'm going to keep that in mind in our discussion. Let's talk about the traumas. Let's talk about um those challenges that you're saying, you know, let's beat him up and let's work on it and let's, you know, you you're talking you you're oversimplifying it, but it's you're talking about 69 years, right, of living and 65 of them in that world of trauma and, you know, trying to figure it all out. So, I'm sharing with you one of my traumas. I was called a manuval when I was 12 years old. Um, I also got um, you know, I I shared this once on on the pod a long time ago. I got smacked in my face by my principal because I had my hands in my pocket while praying and and daving because God forbid, you know, who do you think you are to put your hands in your pocket, right? So, that's the memory I've had my whole life of of prayer of davining like, oh my god, like and I've gotten over it. I've worked on it. You know, I'm I'm a big boy now and like, you know, like we're saying before, but take me to back to 10 years ago when this was trauma for me. Take me back to the trauma that I've had or give me some examples of stories and go back to who you were as a kid. I want to know who you were in class. Were you the guy playing sports? Were you the guy bullying? Were you the one getting bullied? >> I was I was the outstanding student. You know why? Because I was always out. I was always out. >> I like that. Okay. I mean, if you think I got to tell you, school, there was no place more fun than school. If my parents wanted to punish me, would not let me go to school. >> Really? >> Absolutely. >> How'd that happen? >> I'm telling you, we had the time of our life in school. I mean, there's no jokes. >> Good for you. >> Yeah. We It's not what we did, it's what we didn't do. It's like it was insane. >> So, so then take me through the process of when you say trauma, when's the first time you recognize that? >> So, I tell you, I want you to know something. Trauma, you know, we make a big thing about things. You know what I'm saying? Like, for example, I work with people, right? So, a guy comes to me and says, "You know what? I suffer from anxiety." So, I said, "So what? You suffer from anxiety and therefore therefore what? Therefore, it's a challenge. It's a struggle. Figure it out. Let's figure it out. Let's add it. Let's see how to get rid of it. And you know what? If I were you, I also suffer from anxiety. What's the big deal? Another guy says, I'm traumatized because this happened. I said, so therefore, so what happened? So therefore, what? I'm traumatized. What are you traumatized about? Well, this happened, that happened, everything. So life has to be so simple. I I'll show you why the right all the wicked, most nasty, brutal things that ever can go on, right? Hashem says, "Why? Why did it happen?" He says, "Directly why?" Because you didn't serve Hashem with happiness and goodheartedness. >> Whoa. Pause. Right. Where where is this? What? Explain. You >> don't forget we have some non-Jewish listeners, people who are are Orthodox their whole life. and don't know what the word is. >> Right? So to is like everybody knows that there at the end of the Torah in certain of the paras >> we're holding there now >> the chapters right in there chapters there's a place where it talks about all the curses and all the terrible things that could happen to people and this that the other thing and the worst possible the worst the worst worst worst worst worst may have not even seen it. so bad yet. God forbid, whatever. And the reason why it happens is Hashem tells us exactly why it happens. It's the only time that Hashem says exactly why something happens. And you know why? Because we didn't serve Hashem with happiness and good-heartedness. Never serve Hashem. What does serve Hashem mean? Like what Hashem needs us to serve him? Ridiculous. It's crazy. He really doesn't need us. He doesn't need anything. God doesn't need anything. Get it? He needs us to serve him. I mean, like, hello, get a life. You understand? He doesn't need us to serve him. Trust me. Serving. There has to be something different than serving. You may you may translate avoda, the Hebrew word avoda as serving. You could translate it to whatever you want. Who cares? It doesn't change the meaning of it. So the when it says it's because you didn't serve Hashem. Serving over here means appreciating. Plain and simple. Hashem says all this crazy stuff happened is because you don't appreciate me. That's all. You're not happy. You're not happy. You should be happy. And you should be good-hearted. That means be sensitive. Be caring. sharing. >> So, you're telling someone who witnessed, God forbid, some of the worst tragedies in the world >> that um stop it with your traumas and your anxieties because you're not appreciating Hashem. >> Just try to explain that to me. Meaning, >> right, it's >> if you don't mind, just break it and I'll tell you why. Let's break it down a second. Again, you're you're living in a in a in a planet, right, >> for the past four years of your life, I guess, right? 65 you mentioned >> that is >> a little bit different than uh the way I see it on a daily basis because you've studied it for so long and you're involved in it >> and you're laughing at it because it you're living it >> but come down to my level if you don't mind for a few minutes. Let let's just figure out what I'm going through. My anxiety that I wake up with in the morning. my trauma that I have from witnessing things or seeing things that hurt me and hurt my reflection on how I look at human beings or you know maybe not on God so much but you know you you're you're simplifying it and I've heard this approach in the past and I applaud you for being here where you are right now >> and I still want to hear your feedback about your background and we're going to get there but let's just break it down for me in in the simplicity of it if you don't mind break it down for me a little bit. very simple is very important because a lot of times I come across like this and people take it the wrong way for me to not validate something that went on by a person is insane. It's insanity. That means you want to tell first of all Hashem knows we're human beings. So if we're human beings, human beings get hurt. I mean, what do you think? Human beings don't get hurt. So I want you to know something. Validating is the essence of why the happens. Why does the happen? Why is all this rebuke happens? remember is because I didn't appreciate Hashem and I wasn't happy with what I have. That's happiness. Good-hearted. What does good-hearted mean? Good-hearted means good-hearted. That means validating, caring, being sensitive, um being committed to the other person, doing whatever you can for the other person, understanding the person, being there for the person, taking care of the person. What do you think good-heartedness is talk is talking about? Is it skipping the validation and people's pain and anguish and suffering? I mean, hello. Darn it. We have to understand something that bad is insane. Good is sanity. You understand? Bad is insane. Like it's pretty funny. Hashem has a bad rap. Plain and simple. He has a terrible, terrible rap. Understand? No question about it. So, the thing is, let's break it down. Okay. What does that mean? God, your God, God is God. He's perfect. He's great. He's magnificent. He's way above it. Now, what do you think God is about? And if you don't I mean, the idea is to be in reality, man. You understand? It's like I say, I believe in God. Dude, believing in God is a decision. Plain and simple. Nobody proved that God exists. They may have proved it with seal like you know logic this that the other thing. Prove that God exists. Nobody. Did anybody prove that he doesn't exist? Nobody. Nobody will ever be able to prove that he doesn't exist. But will people be able to prove that he does exist? Absolutely not. Because if you prove that God exists now, you don't have any you don't have free choice, free will anymore. It's clear. Everything's clear. There's no choosing. There's no nothing. You don't get any like what are you doing? There's no struggle. There's no there's nothing. Duh. Okay. You you understand? >> Yes. I I I see where you're going with it. I just I want to back up again and say talk to me about the trauma as I'm experiencing it. Right. So, um you know, this past week in in in our community, these two boys on a motorcycle got hit by a car, right? >> Okay. They're in the hospital right now. Now, talk to me about appreciating God >> and and for them to understand what appreciate. Talk to me about the the people that lost their families in fires or in floods >> or people that have been uh you know molested or you know raped >> and beaten and mugged and murdered and >> all those things right and hurt right so >> anguish mental anguish >> right right >> so then >> okay so so the thing is like this we need it's a question who is God you understand we it. Who God who are you? You understand? Is there a way of dealing with you God or is there no way of dealing with you God? Is there a way? If there's a way, for heaven's sakes, please show us the way. So, Hashem says, "I'm willing to show you the way, but make an effort to find the way." That means prison, you know, this is God. God, you're out of here. You understand? Like what are you doing? The Holocaust, the this that like what's the matter with you? Like you know saying God is that God can't be God. So God says who says who says it can't be me but because you because you because the devil told you so. That means we need to understand that there is a way out of pain, misery, hell, call whatever you want. There's got to be a way out of this stuff. If there's no way out of this stuff, then it's not fair. Then God, you are not fair. Plain and simple. So that means as follows. Anything that happens, there's a way to deal with it. And Hashem wants us to find a way to deal with it because that's what he's all about. So I'll give you an example like David. If you ask ask a guy when I mention the word God, what comes to your mind right away? Reaction. >> Impulse reaction. >> Powerful. >> Okay. So now I'm not knocking it. Don't get me wrong. But there was a man by the name of David. David, king of Israel. When you mention the word God to David, you know what his reaction was? Happiness. How you like that one? You believe that? [snorts and laughter] That's the last thing that anybody will like in today's day and age after all the you know what that happened for 5,786. You say, "You mention God's name to me and I'm going to say happiness. Hell no. Maybe there is such a thing as happiness. You know, it's a part of the world. It's it's a certain aspect. This, that, the other thing. If this happens, that dude, happiness, God. Impossible. No, wait. >> You're saying yet that's what King David would describe. Where did you get that from? That's >> it says in Right. He says, "I placed God in front of me." >> Right. That's why I'm happy. Believe it. And we're not educated for this stuff. You understand? We took the wrong We drank the wrong soup, man. God is about [clears throat] happiness. God is about happiness. He wants us happy. He wants us having fun. He wants us being good to each other. He wants a [clears throat] beautiful, stunning world. Happy people don't get into trouble. They don't cause trouble for other people. This is what God is all about. He created this world to give. He's a giver. It's all about for us. Imagine the the father is angry at his kid cuz he's not happy. I told you to be happy. Like, you know what I'm saying? It's like it's insane. It's really I'm telling you, man. It is like >> it's probably probably not the right approach. >> It was not the right approach. >> So what what would you say, you know, >> what would you say to have um I'm a parent, >> right? >> Okay. And I'm coming to you for help. >> Right. >> Right. My kids aren't happy. >> Right. >> And you know, I'm a pretty happy guy and uh my kid's eight years old and I have another 12-year-old and they're fighting, >> right? and they're not happy and [clears throat] and you know give me the formula if you can break it down for me and again >> let's try to dumb it down a little bit because it's pretty obvious that I can tell that you're high on life bro you are just high on life you're high on happiness >> and you are on this drug for almost 5 years now and >> but be be careful I'm high on people >> okay >> I'm more high on people than I am of God Remember, explain. >> That means the difference between Judaism and any other isms that mankind comes before God. Means my relationship to my fellow man is more important than my relationship to God. And guess what? That's what God wants. Isn't that amazing? That actually is amazing. Yes. Thank you for clarifying that because the happiness that you're talking about comes from people and uh you know I always I've learned that you know there's God in all of us, right? So we have an we have a we have a soul >> and so you're you're your highness that you're that I was referring to you're correcting me and saying it's not from just so much of God it's of people which is good but and again you've been doing this for so many years. It's not even so many years to be honest with you. a few years. It's less than 5 years, but you you can tell that you're this is who you are and what you're dealing with on a daily basis. You said earlier you wake up in the morning and you're thanking all the people that are happy and you're thanking you know, Hashem for Adam and Kava. I mean, who does that, right? So, whatever. No, no. I I'm learning from you. It's okay. It's okay. I also like to be happy with and from you. >> I want you to understand something when we talk about appreciation. So, right away we say appreciate God. Dude, what about appreciate each other? Appreciate each other. Doesn't Hashem say, "Love your fellow as yourself? I am God." Why doesn't he say, "I am God. Love your fellow as yourself." Hashem says, "Put people first." Appreciation. Do you have appreciation? Do you have appreciation for your for your father, for your mother, for your grandfather, for your brother, for your sister, for your children? for for yourself. Do you have appreciation for yourself? Hello? Anybody home? Why not? >> This is good. This is good. This is This is You're breaking it. You're breaking it down for me a little bit more now. I can understand it more. I can >> This is rock salad power. >> I'm I'm loving this energy inside you. And I'm trying to get it out in a methodical way that I can understand it and I can have a formula to break it down for myself. Right. >> And I'm appreciating what you're saying. So appreciating >> the people around you, >> right, >> is a godly thing. >> So, and that's something that we need to recognize more and I and I accept that upon myself. I appreciate what you're saying. And and having a relationship with oneself is also something that I've been exploring recently, >> of course, >> and and in talking about, you know, having a relationship with others, but learning how to have a relationship with ourselves and our subconscious and and the shadow of ourselves, which >> Let me show you something. It's very simple. Our soul is a guest to our body. That's it. Plain and simple. So now soul I mean are you going to pay attention to the body or not? You have a decency to pay attention to the body. I mean after all it's your host. What's the matter with you? What do you you fly off somewhere? soul, everything's spiritual, this that dude, you came into a material place. Can you imagine? You invite a guest over to your house and the guest treats the house like a pigsty. I mean, like what are you degenerate? You don't take care of your host. Yeah, it's true. He's a guest. I mean, yeah, they they invited you in to take care of you or whatever it is. But what does that mean? that you don't have to take care of your host. >> So that's what you're saying. The reflection of oneself of the relationship [laughter] >> is is to understand and appreciate that you are hosting your soul. >> I'm hosting my soul. You got to take care of myself. >> Okay. You know what I'm saying? And my soul is the source of taking care of myself because he's a piece of Hashem. And that's why he's sent down here to be good to the body. Just the opposite. Everybody like focused on the soul. The soul is focused on the body because the soul is doing because anything from Hashem is about doing for somebody else. It's what it can do for somebody. So if my soul comes into my body, my soul comes to my body is to do something for my body. Not only that, my soul comes into my body to elevate my body completely and make it like a soul. Like there are certain people that walked into the Garden of Eden when they died. Why? Because they were transformed from material to spiritual. Mind you, my father was no slouch either. >> Yeah. What's your father doing? >> My father was a businessman and a kum. He spent his time either learning or making money. >> Beautiful. >> That that was him. He was they used to say on him used to say I'm not afraid of Marusion but I'm afraid of Morris Weineberg. >> Wow. That's amazing that you even have that being said about you know your dad. So you know >> Yeah. My father was a piece of work. >> What an upbringing you must have had. And and again that's what I'm trying to tap into. So So you're you're you're you're doing your years in Israel. You're still single, right? You've gotten married at a certain point. >> I got married at 24. at 24 sh system. >> Um I I'll tell you the truth. The the girl that I married who I'm married to right now is the lit I had my mind made up that she was going to be the last girl that I was going to go out with. I was so frustrated in the dating scene that I said, "You know what? That's it. She's the last girl." >> [snorts] >> And the truth of the matter is that she wasn't so much a more as like a mutual family connection. So it wasn't like >> Got it. But either way, you're saying this was it. >> This was it. >> That's it. And it worked. >> And it worked. >> Okay. That's right. >> Okay. What were you frustrated about the system? >> I'm saying it just didn't go. I couldn't I couldn't find anybody that I wanted to marry. >> So you're going date after date after date. >> And And I got engaged a few times. >> Oh, you did? >> Yeah. >> So you broke off a few engagements? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> By the way, uh we have a lot of youngsters listening to our podcast. I get a lot of feedback. Any feedback for people going now that you went through this >> and you're living a world of happiness and recognition of happiness. >> Any simple words of encouragement or advice that you can give for people going through the world. >> Okay. The first thing I mean I'm obsessed with happiness. You got to understand happiness. I I believe that happiness happiness is not only going to bring Msiah but happiness is Msiah. That means when we get into that we when people find out what happiness is, it's going to be Msiah plain simple because that's the ultimate. So, so let's put it this way. If you're going out dating, you need to learn what dating is. That's number one. If you don't know what dating is, you don't belong dating. You're going to get rejected and you're going to get frustrated and you get this and you get that and do it. Dating is something that needs to be learned. If you don't learn it 10 to one, you're going to get messed up. >> Okay. Okay. That's number one. >> That's number one. >> So, I'd love to know what it is, but take me to the number two then. Okay. >> Um, and number two is I want something that's going to last throughout the time that I spend with this person. That means let's say I get married at 20 and we're I'm going to die at 90. I want something in this girl. The girl wants something in the boy that I know is going to last straight through. It's not going to get messed up. So, let's say I'm looking for Let's say I'm looking for a beautiful girl. Let's say the guy is looking let's say the girl is looking for a beautiful guy. It's very nice. Go for it. But is that something that's going to last till 90 years old? I don't think so. So, I want something that is unshakable. I can depend on it and it's going to it's going to give over my legacy and it's going to I mean there's nothing like it. I want that one thing that is there and it could be happiness but happiness is so d is so threatened that I have to be careful with happiness of expecting too much but midos that means being a fine person a dignified person and a caring person and a social person. I mean that is like that's major. >> So take me back to the number one then. By the way, thank you. I I like that. What is dating then? Well, you said it before. >> Okay, so watch this. It's very simple. Dating is me finding out whether I am for this person and whether this person is for me. Both. That means I may be for this person but this person may not be for me. So the best scenario is when I'm good for that person and that person is good for me. That's perfect. So now a guy goes out and he's a little weak and he he's dating a girl and he loves the girl and he thinks the girl is great and then the girl rejects him. He falls apart. What are you falling apart for? You should thank Hashem that one of you realized that it's not good. That means you may have been very good for her, but she wasn't good for you. So, either you find that out or she finds it out. But that's why we're dating. So that one of us finds it out because we're dating objectively because she's objective about me. I'm objective about her. So that's the perfect way of dating. Am I good for her? Is she good for me? >> Got it. Okay. I appreciate that. So, let's go back to you. You're dating and it's the last girl, right? >> And you know, you didn't know all these rules back then, right? Because you were young and you were learning. >> That's right. >> You get married and you go into the world of textile, you're saying. >> That's right. That's right. >> How'd you even find your first job? What did you do? >> Well, my father was in textile business. >> Oh, I see. Okay. So, you followed in your father's footsteps, >> right? Exactly. >> Okay. >> So, at different points I worked for him. At different points, I worked for myself. You know, we're speaking a lot about, you know, your family and and values and things that you learned. >> So, I grew up in a business house. >> Give me something that you learned from your father. >> Give me something a good a good, you know, tip that he taught you about life or a good something that you can pass on that he that you just you felt within him or you saw or he told you or something. Um, first of all, my father was extremely generous, extremely um ext beyond generous. He was um um good-hearted and he was tough as nails. So, he plowed through. That's probably something that I really got from him. Even though there were times that I didn't think I was going to be able to plow through, but I plowed through anyway. But he plowed through a lot of stuff. Beautiful. >> And that's a big big big thing. I want you to know, you should know something. Life is so amazing. You have no idea. I'm telling you. it. You'd be surprised how amazing it is, how easy it is for people to see how amazing it is, and for people to feel good and to be relieved of their stress and their anguish. You believe it. I want you to know something like this, very simple, and we need to realize this. The Ben Israel, the Jews, were the nation that lasted the longest, right? We're the toughest of the nations. No question about it. Who are the people, if you really break it down, who are the people that were the solid links from one link to another that brought us to where we are today? The longest nation and the toughest nation. Who what is that made out of? I'm telling you, it's a twist like you never believe. >> You want me to guess? >> Yeah. I I >> I would say it's the father to a son. >> Okay, very good. I validate that. But I want you to think about something else. The people that suffer and despite their suffering, they stay strong in Yadas and these are the people. These are the links. And it's [clears throat] so interesting that the people that suffer, [laughter] they're the ones that are going, "Why am I suffering? Why am I suffering? Why? Why does God do this to me? What is like I can't take it? What's the matter with you?" And and you know, they feel so bad about themselves and they feel like they're nothing. You're the man. This is crazy. You are the man. You don't even realize what's going on here. You're the link. That's why I'm here because of guys like you that went through it and stood fast. You said guys after the Holocaust that built big families. These are the men, man. These are the men. These are the women. These are the These are the people. >> Wow. >> That is so powerful. >> Wow. I'm I'm starting to see what your uncle saw, by the way. [laughter] But I'm also appreciating it to the next level because you've you're studying you took all your craziness of your life and your years >> and you plummeted through it, >> right? >> And you learned that from your father and you went through that and you and you digested it. >> Also my mother was a very isha amita. That means she she um was very honest and true. So it gave me also a truth like seeking the truth. truth to truth. >> I love that, by the way. I am I'm a a truth seeker all the way through. >> I love the art of a debate, >> right? >> Simply because I always want to find out what the truth is, you know? And I play this game with my friends a lot. >> Michael, let let me show you something. Let me show you how powerful >> what you could do, what you could do for people. You can't imagine. And I I'll tell you, maybe the guy is going to watch this. I was at a wedding and I see this guy is a a He looks like a regular guy. Suit this that the other thing. He's a ber. He's a ber a friend of the right. I said I here's an opportunity. Here we go. Watch this. I went over to the guy and I said, "Come, I want to talk to you for a minute." Brought him outside. I said, "My friend, hi, my name is Harvey Weinberg. you know, I'm I help people get through challenges and this and that and I like when people have it goodah. I said, "Buddy, I am going to change your life now." He said, "Really?" I said, "I'm telling you, your life will change right now." He says, "Oh, really?" Let's see. I said to the guy like this. I said, "Let me ask you something. If before you came to this world, God said, "Yakov," he grabbed a hold of you when he said, "Ya, let me ask you something. Would you be willing to be a so that your friend doesn't have to be the midget?" You would say, "God, I'm in." He said, "That's who you are. You took it for your friend." Imagine that. So when you walk around thinking that you have a handicap, baby, you know who has the handicap, the guy that you took it from. [laughter] >> Wow. >> Imagine that. I tell you, the guy did react lit up. >> Yeah. >> He didn't know what to do with himself. >> Wow. >> He was like pumped. >> I guess you can do that for any disability that a someone has any any uh >> You have no idea challenge. Now the Now the guy walks around like he's king. >> Wow. Wow. >> Is that amazing? >> Yeah. Know, I like this. And and again, seeking the truth, which is >> and it could be the God's honest truth, right? Think of God in the best way possible. Come up with a brilliance. Like you see the Torah says like this, if things bad are happening to you, check out the deeds. >> Check out the >> check out your deeds. Check out that means something happens to me. I say >> check yourself >> bad. Yeah, something bad. I stuck my toe. So why did I st my toe? Oh, because I used my toe for something wrong or this and that. I did this. Dude, when it says that something bad happens to you, check out your deeds. You know whose deeds we're talking about? God's deeds. That means when something bad happens to a person, even though everybody says there's nothing bad, I mean, come on. You're a human being. bad. I mean, a guy gets punched in the nose and he screams. You think Hashem says, "What are you screaming for? Everything is good." When something bad happens, look to [clears throat] see where Hashem's is. Trust me, if you find the Hashem did, it will overwhelm everything that you went through pale in comparison. >> It's hard to find that though sometimes, >> but that's the struggle in life. >> Sure. That's the power. The power is The power is choose, choose, choose. Stay strong. You know what I'm saying? That's what it's all about. Moshe told Yeshua in front of all. What do you do that for? Yeshua was with him all day. He has to tell him in front of all Israel. He points out to us that you could be Yeshua. need. It's important to have it. It's important to ask for it and you need it. And if you think you don't need it, then you really need it. You know what I'm saying? Pal. [laughter] Wow. Yes. You know, I haven't been called a pal, by the way, in 30 years, you know. Um, so I [clears throat] appreciate that and I appreciate everything you're saying. And again, going back to truth seeeking, you know, um >> I I'm still looking into you and I'm still trying to understand your background and the the challenges that you went through in order to figure out how to get over it because I want to learn from that experience. >> Watch. Let me let me show you something. Let me cut to the chase. >> This will really be helpful. The way I deal with trauma, okay? The way and I want you to know something. Anything that I do, I share the tools and techniques that I use for myself with other people. >> Sure. >> That's it. Plain and simple. You understand? So, I'm in it with it. I'm in it to win it together with you. Okay? Plain and simple. So, and in fact, when I help somebody out, it helps me out to the nth degree because I'm able to see myself objectively. I talk and I hear myself talk and this and that. Okay. trauma. Here we go. Watch it. Watch me slice through this trauma like you're never like a razor blade. Okay. I say to myself, Avi, if I was God, as if I was God, I would have designed my life exactly the way it was. Why? Because God is perfect. And God runs the show. God is the creator, the sustainer, the director, the supplier. God runs everything. So whatever happened till now, if I was God, I would have done the same same thing. You hear that here? Real good. If I was God, I would have designed my life exactly the way it was. Guess what? Next level. If I understood God, if I understood his his reasons and his that, guess what? I would have asked him [clears throat] to design it that way. I like that. So I look back at my life and I say, "Yo, buddy, if I was God, I would have designed my life that way." And you know what? I asked God for all the things that happened to me. I asked him for it. I asked him that. Now, the only problem with this thing is is putting myself in there. Get the hell out of it. You understand? Take yourself out. What are you putting yourself in there? I put myself in there. I want to figure out. What do you want to figure out? What are you nuts? You want to figure out God's want to figure out God's reasoning? Mosher Rabenu doesn't understand God and you won't understand God. Get off of it. You know what it was? It was a freaking nightmare. That's what it was. Can I see my nightmare? No. How much time do I spend in a nightmare? None. Can I see my past? No, get off of it. You want to I tell you what you want to be. Everybody wants to be Malik. >> What do you mean? >> That means you want to you want to do the ultimate. The ultimate is to wipe out a Malik. >> The ultimate for who? For me. >> The ultimate for life. Yeah. The ultimate for every person is to wipe out a Malik. Because when we wipe out a Malik, Hashem's throne becomes complete. And that's it. We're home free. >> Okay. All right. >> You want to wipe out a Malik? >> I I guess now I do. >> That's right. Wipe out your past. Freaking wipe it out. >> Is this why you're having such a hard time with me? Not in a not in a negative way. Is this why you're having such a hard time with me going back to the past? >> Because this is your attitude. Your attitude is wipe it out. Stop sitting and, you know, indulging on your past. >> It's not It's not necessary. >> No. This is I think what who you are as a person. Every time I ask you to go back into your past, you keep pushing at me another answer. I'm starting to pick up on that and understand. >> I want you to know something like this. The life is the I call him the bald. I call him the the snake. Whatever it is, he always says, "Look at this. Look at that. Look at that. Look at this. Look at that. Look at that. Look at that. Why happened? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Dude, if I'm going to Baltimore, it takes me 4 hours to get there, right? And I start detering from my you saying I see this. Go, wow, what's that? I see that. What's that? Wow. So, I make all these stops. I'm getting there in 10 hours instead of four hours. I have one path. My path is from the kiss cover from Hashem's throne back to the Kar cupboard, baby. I'm going to make it as short as possible, as quick as possible. I'm going to be a Zurus straight in there, baby. You have been tame says be bold like a like a leopard. Be swift like an eagle. Be swift. Don't keep Don't be so grounded. How can I rusty run like a deer? What is a deer? A deer, as soon as it smells danger, it runs the hell out. I can open my door in the backyard. Five deer. I open my door, I come out, they all run. Where are you running from? Terra says when they smell danger, they run. They don't even they don't make a could handle it. Now, they get the hell out of here. And Gibra read like a freaking lion. You know what I'm saying? That means you want you want to rest. A lion sleeps most of the day, but when he's up Oh my god. Look out, baby. >> Right. You know what I'm saying? >> Yeah. No, I I I I I appreciate what you're saying. I really do. I really really do in terms of, you know, the wiping out of that mullik is wiping out of your history of your of your challenges. >> It's clean. I'll show you proof after proof after proof after proof after proof >> that what >> that Amalik is the past. >> Amalik is the past. >> Absolutely. >> You got to wipe away your past. The >> Amalik >> I want you to know something. And the Amalik says you must wipe me out. I tell him I'm not wiping you. I I'm you're being wiped out. Don't tell me what I have to do. You understand? >> No, I didn't understand that. >> Okay. That means he says be busy with the the the devil. >> Okay. The devil's >> devil says be busy with wiping out your past. Be busy with wiping out your B. >> Where does he say this? You're saying this is just a >> this is this is an understanding. >> Yeah. This is the understanding. >> This is not or anything. >> It's like if I tell you like this, don't think of a pink elephant. Don't think of a pink elephant. You're you're going to say, >> I have the most vivid image of a pink elephant now in my head now. Exactly. Right. Rest of the conversation. So, so what what are you going to do now? Um, he told me not to think of a pink elephant. Not to think of a pink elephant. Not get it. Think of a white cow. And that's how you get rid of the pink elephant. That means we got to substitute our minds. And my mind can only think one thing at a time. So, switch it. Don't focus. I just want, you know, I want first of all all the listeners to recognize something because I'm about to say something. >> First of all, you you might be putting all therapists out of business by what you're doing, what you're saying. But that being said, and I want to be very clear on this, >> right? >> What you're describing is a lifetime of recognition and of work. This is not something that just happens overnight. You can't just get hit on the head. Just like you can't turn on the emotion of being bas and being happy. Oh, be happy. Like you said earlier, you can't do it. So too, you can't just turn on this like, you know, oh, wipe out your past. Just it doesn't work that way. So, I think that what I'm gaining from this conversation at least is that the therapy is the understanding of what it takes to wipe out your past and understanding that it's not necessary. And that is the amalik, the sut and the devil. And understanding what the creation was all about of Adam and Eve and what the desire was and where it came from. If I spend my time studying this conversation over the next few years, I will 100% lead a happier life. It's not even a question. I appreciate what you're saying. I really, really do and I understand. I get it. And and I speak to a lot of people about therapy and trauma. We always go back to these conversations and uh you know, in terms of sometimes you just have to stop, you know, dwelling in it. And and and I agree with that to a extent. If you can figure out the tools of how to stop living in that life, then it's worth it. But you can't just say, "Wipe it out." >> You need tools and techniques, >> you know, and I like it. >> And this is the beginning of it. You're really And I said, I always say like one of the best things I love about this podcast, I get a front row seat of learning so many amazing things and growing with these discussions and and again, like I said earlier, I was trying to say before that I play this game with my friends of called switch, which is like every debate I can be the opposite. >> Right. Right. So I want to do that with you for a second, which is I can't I just can't I'm not going to be able to take my amalic of the past. If God put that in my past and he put it there for me for a reason. So I need to learn from it. I need to pick up on those pieces. So I want to talk about that for a moment. Okay. So watch. This is how I deal with my past. Avi God was training me. And while I went through it, I didn't realize that. Had I realized that when I was going through it would have been piece of cake. >> Right? But that's goes against the whole grain of life. Meaning you can't realize it while you're going through it because that's the whole says who so I want you to know something. He says you got to be be smart in life. We need to be smart sly cunning. We need to be smart and catch the mean things of life. The kazal say like this either a person has a friend or they die in per it says buy a friend doesn't say how much you should spend when it comes to a rv it says make yourself for a when it comes to a friend says buy that means if you have to spend every last penny that [clears throat] you have from the time that you were born to the time that you die and you can get a friend pay for Now watch this gets better. Say like this. A poor person is considered like he's dead. A blind person. He's considered as if he's dead. When it comes to a friend, it doesn't say orusa or death. It's not like death. It is death. That means there are few things that are synonymous with life. One of them is happiness. Number two is friendship. That's life. No happiness, no life. No friend, no life. Plain and simple. As simple as all that. >> Wow. Uh it's it's it's very powerful. The words that you're saying are very very very powerful, >> thick, powerful. >> I'm really enjoying this conversation. There's a lot that you're a lot that you're exposing to the world and I know that you started on >> very good. >> You mentioned that you have your own platform now that you're putting things out there. You know, every morning when I go for my walk, >> right, >> I listen to uh daily bakan. It's a 12minute like he tries to make it 11 minutes against the 30. Michael Safy I think is >> Michael Safy, right? >> And uh take it to the next level. >> You remind me of him a little bit by the way. >> I want you to know something. >> He talks about about relying on >> I'm talking about happiness. Happiness will bring you to amuna everything that you want. >> But got to start from happiness, >> right? And to break it down. and to break it down because you know I I I want to do this for for our listeners and for myself >> right >> we just spoke for over an hour about you know the the the importance of happiness so let's rewind a little bit and understand in order to get there in order to put the work in what do we need to do what are we learning from this >> ready I'm going to shock you >> okay so I'm writing a book called happiness we all have it right >> happiness we all have it >> okay >> a person >> you already you already settled on title. >> Yeah. >> Okay. >> It's a great title. >> I love it. >> Love it. The point is like this. I need It's important for me to realize that I am a happy person. That's who I am. That defines me at my core. Happiness. How you like that? >> So maybe you need to say the word happiness in a different way. What do you mean? I'm a happy person. Do I look like my face is exuding happiness now? No. >> So what does that mean to a human being? So the pro one of the problems is everybody talks about happiness but nobody defines it. >> Correct. So do [clears throat] it for us. >> Okay. So you ready? Here we go. Right in between your eyes. Happiness is the focus on good things that I have in my life. Remember it's the focus on good things that I have in my life. That means realizing it, appreciating it, and knowing it. If I knew the good things that are going on in my life, I recognize them. I realize them, I know it, I know where it's coming from, why it's given, and what to do with it. I got that down, Pat. I [clears throat] am set for life. >> Okay. All right. All right. So, I don't need to read I don't need to read your book anymore then. >> Right. [laughter] Right. >> No, I I appreciate that. I want to go back to the friend thing first. >> I'm just saying remember remember >> I'm just going to press repeat on what you just said. >> God is fair. God is beyond fair. God is great. How is he great? Because God says, "The things that I'm doing for you are so fantastic that if you hooked in to what I'm doing for you, your life would be a breeze." >> I love it. >> And I have proof for it. Mark my words. I'm not just making this up out of my head. >> When you say you have proof for it, can you expand on that? Because I I do like all the words that are coming out of your mouth. >> I help people only through hazal. >> Okay. I don't help people through goes stories or books or this that whatever I don't care whether they're from not from I don't I don't care. >> It says like this when parro came when Yakov comes to parro right Jacob comes to par comes to Mr. Parro takes a look at him and he goes yo what's up with you he looked like a wreck like a total wreck. >> Well he thought his son was missing for a number of years. >> Yeah. >> He was a wreck. >> Yeah he was a wreck. Okay. So, so watch. So, he tells parro listen my life was short and bad. So, right who I don't know if he's a whatever he says like this. He says when Jacob said that to parro Hashem says Yakov that's how you talk about me. I saved you from as love Dina and Yoseph and and you say your life was short and bad. That's how you talk. So the question god I understand what do you want from Yakov as wanted to kill him. Love on bes like to uproot everything. Dena was the most embarrassing thing ever. Yoseph was still suffering from Yoseph today. And you and you have a problem with Yakov's head. >> Isn't that a great kasha? >> Let him complain a little bit. >> I mean for heaven's sakes. Yeah. I mean, [clears throat] complain. It's a miracle. He's alive. Each one of them was enough to kill anybody. Give me the switch. >> Here's a switch. Hashem says, "Yakov. Your focus. You You just shift your focus, pal. Shift. Don't be f be obsessed about the good that you have, not about the bad that [clears throat] you have. The good watch this now, who is Jacob? Jacob has it made in the shade. He's the biggest master in the Torah. Jacob is is the is the choice of all the he is his sura is carved out in the throne. He has 12 all good not like a hadish as shift nothing less he has you so down pat he has everything he's strong as hell you understand he goes in he picks up the the rock by um you know when Leia and Leia came to to um water [clears throat] there came and everything. I mean he has it all. He has everything he has. If he would have focused on that as of love on Dena Yose who cares. >> Okay. >> And think about it. >> I I am and I'm saying so that was his flaw. His flaw was not recognizing that not shifting. The floor was shift, >> right? That was it. That's what Asham was saying. >> Shift your focus, >> right? >> That's it. >> 100%. >> If you focus on good, mark my words, you'll be blown out of the sky. And I'll tell you, God reminds us of this all the time, but we don't we don't get it because we're not trained to get it. Watch. A person goes to the to the restaurant. He says at the end of the he says that means you do a pella. You know what pillar is? There's a nace and this pella. Nace is you know um a nace happened. I fell and I almost banged my head on the desk. I could have had 25 stitches. It's a nice [snorts] appella. Aella is um like I walked out um like I I walked through a window or something like I or like um my car lifted up. I mean something outrageous. That's a pella. >> And the literal translation nace miracle pella wonder >> wonder. Right. >> Yeah. So imagine person uses a restaurant he says guy asks somebody what's doing anything doing nothing's doing same oh same day different stuff same stuff different day you would think that nothing's happening to the person you would think that nothing is happening you know that the more nothing is happening is more happening shabas anything happening on chabas can we see Anything going on in Chabas that is different than the rest of the week? Nothing. There's nothing in Chabas. Meanwhile, that's the action. It's the action of all action. Shabas. When I go like this, can I see my breath? No. So, the things that I don't see, the things that I don't notice, the things that this, those are the things that are happening. So, buddy, wake up, man. >> Okay, you're right. You do have a lot of proof and a lot of uh a lot of >> everything that they [clears throat] said has proof. >> Yeah, >> everything has has proof >> and I appreciate it. Unfortunately, I'm going to have to wrap up in a minute, >> right? >> Um I I can continue this by the way and I am appreciating it and I think that it's a little heavy already. So it's like let everyone, you know, sit on what you said and appreciate it and >> think about it, >> think about it, listen to it again, rewind some parts and >> think about it, >> you know. I I think that >> see if it makes sense. I I think everything you're saying makes a lot of sense with sprinkled with a little bit of crazy. It's making a lot of sense, >> right? But it's not religious, >> right? >> It's >> right. >> It's what makes sense logic. It's not like esoteric or this that the other thing. That's what made us human beings. We're human beings. Think like a human. >> Wow. Aby, this has been a tremendous tremendous discussion. I really appreciate it. I I really I really sincerely and [laughter] you can tell the happiness exuding from you. >> I believe me, I appreciate it more than you appreciate it. [laughter] >> I know. You know, >> I'm kidding. I'm not joking. >> I met you a little over two years ago and we did some bumper stickers and put them on magnets. What's that line that you that you're putting out there? >> We love Hashem. I love you, Hashem. >> But make no mistake, the reason why I love Hashem is because Hashem loves me. That's why it's not I love Hashem. What should I love Hashem for? You know why I love Hashem? Because he loves me. Why do I love Hashem? Because he gives me everything good that I have, he gives me. The bad things I We'll deal with bad things a different time, but I can tell you one thing. Every [clears throat] damn good thing that I have comes from him. And there's you guess what? There's a little note on there. Hi, Ali. I love you. It's God. He has notes all over the place. Right here, there's a note. Note, note. I'm full of notes. You ever see these people that have, you know, pictures all over the place? I have full of notes. Hi, Avi. It's me. God, I love you. >> A Javi, I love you. And uh whether you like it or not, I'm calling you Rabavi. >> I've learned a lot from you today. And uh and I c certainly appreciate it. >> Smack. You know what I'm saying? >> Uh we have a couple of things we like to do before we wrap up. Right. >> You have any questions for me? First of all, not why did I start the podcast? >> [laughter] >> Um >> if you don't have it to it's totally okay. Move on to the next uh the next thing. >> Are you are you I you know what I have a question for you. Do you appreciate your um [clears throat] impact on the world? And do you appreciate what kind of impact you could have more on the world? getting feedback from people is amazing. And it's not the can I take a selfie with you. That's that's not what it's about. It's about someone who just told me the other day >> that >> this podcast saved his marriage. >> Beautiful. >> I couldn't understand it. And he said, "Because you talk about therapy and you talk about people and you connected me to somebody who you don't even know what you did for me and it ended up being amazing." >> So yes, I'm recognizing the impact by hearing the feedback from people. It's very very important hearing back the feed the feedback from people. Of course, >> I'm a I'm a I'm a huge advocate of friends in general. I talk about it all the time and I believe in the concept of right >> and hosting. I like hosting, right? And one of the reasons why I tell my friends all the time, I like hosting is because that's where I'm listening to my other I'm I'm paying for you to come to me so that I can host you so that I you can be my friend and you can come to me. And I think that hosting people talk to me all all the time. You know, people lack friends. >> Oh, tell me about it. People lack friends and the and the the way in my opinion to gain friends is by listening to the host, take him out for lunch, buy him a muffin, find out what he likes. >> Invest in >> invest in it 100%. So I do recognize do I recognize your second part of your question is I recognize the the the potential or the output in the future. That's something I'm learning about myself now. >> I am learning about a relationship that I have to have with myself. I'm I'm on that journey right now. want to have not that you have to have. >> I'm thank you for that. I I am learning about the relationship that I wanted to have with myself and um you know I've been having discussions with one of my uh mentor Rabam I like to call him Zish Mustin because he gives a shir in the morning by Urslammo and he talks about uh you know who you are and I mentioned it earlier the shadow of yourself and your subconscious and you know connecting to yourself through that relationship. So that's amazing. So yes and I appreciate that question. So that's that would be my answer. Um yeah. Yeah, that's that's what I would say. And last question for you is if you were to start a podcast tomorrow, you're going on your journey now of social media and you're putting yourself out there. Who would be a guest that you would interview? >> Michael Greenfield. [laughter] >> Okay. I can't interview myself, but the the question was, >> is it Greenfield? >> Green. It was It was Feldman, by the way. It was turned to Green Grunfeld and then it went to Greenfeld and then Greenfield. >> Greenfield. >> So, uh yeah, it's Greenfield. Thank you. >> I appreciate that. I bet you weren't ready for that. >> I wasn't. I would have let that one sit. I I like that. I want to thank all our subscribers, all of our listeners. Thank you to the Prime Source production team. Don't forget, if you have an operation that you're servicing people and you want to look out for your costs and implement best practice, come to Prime Source. We will help you elevate the level of service you're providing to those people and we will help you cut your costs. Uh we appreciate all the feedback and the subscribers and everyone who's been with us on our journey. Thank you so much Avi for being a part of it and this was amazing. Shaatva to you and to everybody. I think this is going to be the one before the new year because it's coming close and it's uh and and we tapped upon something of loving Hashem and I think that's what I'm going to focus on the entire new year which is how am I going to connect and love Hashem more and recognize that he loves me and how am I going to fight that Satan and how am I going to fight that devil? My friend Zishi Bar has been telling me when you finish your podcast, give a little bit of an antidote of what you learned. And that's what I've learned from this interview today is fighting that sat and recognizing the creation of the world of Adam and Kava and Adam and Eve and recognizing the Satan was there for us in the beginning to be used to feel accomplished and I'm rec to win and to fight back and and and fight back the negativity and taking all that history of trauma and working through it. Not by recognizing and thinking about that peak elephant and and and putting that in our heads constantly, but fighting back the Sutton and winning, by recognizing how much Hashem loves us and loving him back and fighting doing for us, >> how much he's doing for us and fighting back the Saturn and we could go back and forth on this. >> But I can tell you one I can tell you one more thing. >> A final thought, >> a final thought that I can not that I can't like I said it's the content I have content about Rashana that will blow your mind. Share it with us. We'll put it in the description. >> Very very short. >> Yeah. >> The fact that Rashashan is the yoma is the greatest thing ever to take place in the world. How do you like that? >> Isn't that [clears throat] funny? >> Again, >> the fact that makes it the greatest day in the entire Bria. >> How? >> Entire entire world. Because watch this. It says in the first in the beginning of Hashem creating heaven and earth. So Rashi says in the beginning created says like this first the first thing was Hashem says I'm going to create the world within and then he saw that within the world is not going to be the world can't exist within. So he said, "Okay, I'll put together Rahman with Den." Oh, so you know what that means? That den is the greatest. Because if Hashem wanted to create it with Dinen, there's only one reason why. Because it's better. I it wouldn't we wouldn't be able to exist with it. It's cool. But the bottom line is it's better. So we have one day yadin baby cash in man cuz that's the best. >> Wow. Beautiful. That's a wrap. [laughter] >> Wow. Good. >> Amazing. Not good. Amazing. Huzzah. [music]